GoGo Yubari Ranks the James Bond Themes (Except the Main One)

[Hewey]

As long as Live And Let Die and Goldfinger are in the top spots, you won't get any complaints from me. (Y)

But seriously, Die Another Day is such a horrible song, but it does make sense since Die Another Day is the worst Bond movie by far. As for the next song, it's either Licence To Kill or Moonraker maybe?

[SRN]

I agree so far.

So far.

[gunnar hendershow]

Yeah the 2 truly awful ones are out of the way. Most Bond themes are pretty good at the absolute worst, but we've still got a couple songs that are forgettable still to come.

[apsham]

I'm having this huge conflict in my head right now between Diamonds Are Forever and Goldfinger - but I am quite sure that Goldfinger would pull it out in the end. The music there just seems more iconic.

Can we at least get a nod for Snake Eater which, to this day, I would still take over most Bond themes?

[GoGo Yubari]

Interesting guesses from the two people who did! But no. License to Kill was mentioned in that thread, but so was...

20. "GoldenEye" by Tina Turner

Sorry, DoubleX. While I'd agree with show that "Die Another Day" and "All Time High" are way worse than anything else, I'd put "GoldenEye" in as well as a decidedly bad James Bond theme. There are a few Bond themes where you can tell the writers (Bono and The Edge. Yeah. Ick.) were given a cryptic title, maybe told "oh, by the way, GoldenEye is a satellite" (maybe) and had to try to shoehorn it in. Apparently this was a decent hit outside of the US for Tina Turner (of all the people to get in 1995, Tina Turner?), and... good for her? But she mostly sounds bored. She's right to be, since the music accompanying her sounds super-lazy and "this is what a James Bond theme is meant to sound like, especially if you slow it down to 33 rpm." It's a pity that the movie that revitalized the franchise has such a forgettable theme, but there you are.

Next Time: See #22.

[stokeriño]

Hmm...still a handful of Moore-era tunes I'd place lower, but okay.

[Colly]

Also The Man with the Golden Gun, which is horrendous. Goldeneye is boring but its not that shit. Fully agreed on All Time High as all time worst though.

[GA!]

I love the GoldenEye theme.

[GoGo Yubari]

Hmm...still a handful of Moore-era tunes I'd place lower, but okay.

Like this?

19. "For Your Eyes Only" by Sheena Easton

Another product of the fact that basically 80% of the Moore themes were ballad-y love songs. I guess it makes sense since his Bond is the one where the playboy stuff was emphasized more than anywhere else, but it makes for a pretty same-y period of three or four movies. We're at the point where I don't actively dislike any of the themes going forward (and 19 out of 22, that's a pretty good track record), and so it gets harder to properly separate and rank them. "For Your Eyes Only" is... fine? It's not offensive to the ears and it has a pretty good, catchy chorus. But man, it's really just sort of boring when you get away from that, isn't it. I think generally when a Bond theme succeeds you're going to hear a bunch of less-good versions of that theme in subsequent movies, and this is one of them.

Next Time: Great artist, not so great song.

[stokeriño]

Exactly like that.

[Thrilla]

GoGo needs to stop using YouTube videos from EMI that restrict embed viewing on this site.

[GoGo Yubari]

They all work fine for me. I'll see if I can find a different uploader for other ones.

[Thrilla]

Probably just a region issue. You just have to click on a link and it takes you to YouTube, its no biggie.

[GA!]

FOR BRITISH EYES OOOONNNLLLLYYYYY.

[Hewey]

For Your Eyes Only is such a forgetable song, shame, cause it's one of my favorite Bond movies.

Good call on Goldeneye, such a shitty song. I do like the pre credit titles, though.

[Hewey]

For Your Eyes Only is such a forgetable song, shame, cause it's one of my favorite Bond movies.

Good call on Goldeneye, such a shitty song. I do like the pre credit titles, though.

[Vamp]

This went wrong when you pretended that Another Way to Die isn't the worst song. I'd take the DAD tune any day over that awful effort. Just abysmal.

Also, Goldeneye makes great sense (and enhances the movie) if you accept that its a song written for Bond by 006. Because it is. It suits their relationship perfectly.

[Rainiac]

This went wrong when you pretended that Another Way to Die isn't the worst song. I'd take the DAD tune any day over that awful effort. Just abysmal.

Also, Goldeneye makes great sense (and enhances the movie) if you accept that its a song written for Bond by 006. Because it is. It suits their relationship perfectly.

"Revenge is a kiss. This time I won't miss"

Yep, totally written by a guy about another guy. I agree with you about Another Way To Die, just one of many things that film did wrong

[Mick]

This went wrong when you pretended that Another Way to Die isn't the worst song. I'd take the DAD tune any day over that awful effort. Just abysmal.

Also, Goldeneye makes great sense (and enhances the movie) if you accept that its a song written for Bond by 006. Because it is. It suits their relationship perfectly.

"Revenge is a kiss. This time I won't miss"

Yep, totally written by a guy about another guy. I agree with you about Another Way To Die, just one of many things that film did wrong

They did share everything.

[GoGo Yubari]

Oh, whole lot of dislike for "Another Way to Die?" Funny you should mention that.

j/k

18. "Moonraker" by Shirley Bassey

Before I started relistening to every theme, I initially pegged Moonraker to finish 21st, just ahead of "Die Another Day." But actually, repeated listening helps this one a bit; for a movie that's set in space, it has the right vibe. So, not the second-worst. I'm torn on whether I like it more than the next couple either, but I keep falling back to not liking it so much beyond the decent ideas, so whatevs. Anyway, it's another Moore-era love song, and it was the one immediately after "Nobody Does It Better." Like, I think that one really set the tone and had a bunch of subsequent songs trying to do what it did, to greatly diminished effect. It wasn't originally meant to be Shirley Bassey who sang this; it was going to be Johnny Mathis but he dropped out, and if he hadn't this probably would have actually finished lower than "For Your Eyes Only." But it's Bassey, and it's Bond, and even on a song where she's outright said she doesn't really have any attachment to it it still works out to where it's okay-ish. Needless to say, we'll be seeing more of Shirley Bassey on this countdown. But not for a while.

Next Time: "A Bond theme that tries to do what a prior Bond theme did really well and not being as successful" could be a one-sentence summary for this one too.