GoGo Yubari Ranks the James Bond Themes (Except the Main One)

[Vamp]

This went wrong when you pretended that Another Way to Die isn't the worst song. I'd take the DAD tune any day over that awful effort. Just abysmal.

Also, Goldeneye makes great sense (and enhances the movie) if you accept that its a song written for Bond by 006. Because it is. It suits their relationship perfectly.

"Revenge is a kiss. This time I won't miss"

Yep, totally written by a guy about another guy. I agree with you about Another Way To Die, just one of many things that film did wrong

Apparently men can want to kiss other guys. I know right!

Its not a film that resists a queer reading in any way shape or form. That's also the only bit of it that hasn't dated badly.

[gunnar hendershow]

You sort of landed on what is wrong with "Moonraker", it's not a Shirley Bassey song. It's basically restricting her from using her immense talent to its fullest, which is disappointing. The song has no range, and would have likely worked better with a male singer.

All told you're probably now in the part of the list where about 7-8 songs are interchangeable though.

[GoGo Yubari]

It's definitely meant to be a song sung by a crooner, probably designed to evoke "Fly Me to the Moon." But I still like Bassey's tone and delivery more than I imagine I would have liked Johnny Mathis', so it works out.

Oh, right. So I changed the order of the list at the last minute. Instead of pissing one dude off, I'm going to piss a bunch of dudes off! ENJOY.

17. "The World is Not Enough" by Garbage

OH SHIT. YUP. A lot of people have explicitly say they like this one! But I dunno. I think an accusation I'd make of most of the Brosnan themes is that they sound too much like they're trying to be A Bond Theme but not really adding anything on top of it that's uniquely theirs. (SPOILER: I will probably rank something or other higher that you can make the same accusation of.) With "The World Is Not Enough," beyond "Shirley Manson has a nice voice" I really couldn't tell you a single thing about this song that I specifically like, and I can do that about every other song going forward, including songs that have way worse moments/qualities. For some reason this just reads as disappointingly generic to me, when on paper the Garbage theme would look to be the most exciting of the Brosnan themes. Instead, it's (no spoiler here since all the other ones are gone now) Sheryl Crow, who I cannot name a single song of otherwise. Funny how that works out.

Next Time: Probably the song that was going to be here until ten minutes ago! Or maybe something else!

[Mongrel]

DON'T DO WHAT I THINK YOU ARE ABOUT TO DO, GOGO!

[GoGo Yubari]

I don't even know what I'm fully about to do, don't worry

[gunnar hendershow]

Some people are gonna be pissed, but this is good placement for the song. I personally probably would have it a little higher (and I'm going to make my own list to compare), but this whole group is completely interchangeable. Unless of course you put one song in this group that doesn't belong!

[Your Mom]

GoGo....no longer a friend

[SRN]

I can't believe how much I agree with this list so far.

Maybe GoGo DOES have a good taste?

[GA!]

Good call on The World Is Not Enough. I remember when I watched the film again recently, I was surprised how this song doesn't work at all - as though it wants to be epic but something's missing. Mind you, it doesn't help the music video is fucking atrocious as well. I could render better CGI than that.

[GoGo Yubari]

DON'T DO WHAT I THINK YOU ARE ABOUT TO DO, GOGO!

16. "The Living Daylights" by a-ha

This is for sure one of those "this song worked, let's do it again!" Bond themes. After "A View to a Kill" ended the ballad streak, it definitely made sense that producers would want to get another new wave band in a-ha to record another one to follow up. And the results were... decent? This is a decent song. Where I'd say it fails is that it feels a bit all over the place and unfocused, like there were a bunch of ideas that went into the making of this song that never coalesced into one thing. The singer's voice also really doesn't work for me in this one; too much sing-talking. I hate sing-talking. As a Norwegian I wish I could put this higher, in fact! But I can't. It's firmly middle of the pack.

.

Next Time: We're either going to wipe out one Bond's filmography out of contention or eliminate the first movie from another's, depending on what I decide.

[Sousa]

BIH George Lazenby!

[gunnar hendershow]

This song I heard well before I ever watched "The Living Daylights", because who the fuck watches the Timothy Dalton films anyway? But it really is like a carbon copy of "A View to a Kill" in retrospect, though I did enjoy it much more than I probably do now because I was young, ironic, and though New Wave was the best musical movement this side of anything.

Again, though I might and probably would rank this a little higher it fits in perfectly in the group of "good, but not very good" Bond themes.

Most important takeaway from that opening theme though? Those credits read like a list of names you'd expect to see on a "Where are they now?" news story. You can count on one hand the number of people who were confirmed as actually being alive by the end of the Cold War.

[Chris2K]

Moonraker should never out-place anything, ever. And GoldenEye is tremendous! If All The Time In The World is next I might just cry.

[Sousa]

Moonraker should never out-place anything, ever.

The first two are significantly worse than Moonraker.

[Chris2K]

I've never minded All Time High that much to be honest. I think for me and Moonraker it's because I don't like the film and the theme reminds me of that, particularly as it starts just after a 7'4" man survives falling out of the sky without a parachute for "comedy purposes".

[The Mask of Norro]

It's okay Srar, you and me can go appreciate real Bond music in the corner while GoGo acts all high and mighty with his stupid Garbage hating lists

[Noah]

I liked "For your eyes only"

It almost won an oscar! :/

[GoGo Yubari]

I've never minded All Time High that much to be honest. I think for me and Moonraker it's because I don't like the film and the theme reminds me of that, particularly as it starts just after a 7'4" man survives falling out of the sky without a parachute for "comedy purposes".

Letting the quality of the film influence opinions about the quality of the song is something I've worked very hard to not to. Which is why "GoldenEye" was eliminated quick and "A View to a Kill" is still in the hunt.

15. "Another Way to Die" by Jack White & Alicia Keys (from Quantum of Solace)

One thing I really like about the Craig themes is that beyond including one basic leitmotif, all of them feel very distinctly like the end product of the artists who made them. The three we've had thusfar are all their own things with their own styles, which is a breath of fresh air when considering certain runs of songs in Bond theme history. That includes the decidedly weakest of the three, "Another Way to Die," which I actually like much better as a song on its own than as a Bond theme. The reason it's 15th is because I think the chorus is pretty killer, and there are a lot of good musical elements in it. As a Bond theme... eh. The first time I heard it, I hated it. It's grown on me, but Jack White still never should have sung on this song beyond maybe harmonies on the chorus. If he gave more to Keys and got rid of his own sing-talking, it probably would have finished higher. (Also, I totally forgot that Shirley Bassey recorded a possible theme and had it rejected. It's pretty solid, but I get why they shied away from doing it.)

Next Time: See the last hint, but now remove two possible options from that field.

[gunnar hendershow]

I'm a big fan of Jack White, but I can't say I was the biggest fan of him doing a Bond theme. It's decidedly better when looked at separated from the movie, because it is a good song all told. It really doesn't fit though, that's absolutely the biggest knock I have against it.

[apsham]

Oh god. I almost forgot about Another Way To Die. For sure, that would've been in contention with the Die Another Day for last place on mine.