WWE 2007 - The Challenge

[Kyle_]

Couple of things. First, AAE has already been in a match before. And second, I thought Khali was fired from RAW after losing to Flair?

[cloudtheconfused]

I'm really liking this Diary so far..The Helms push, while unexpected at the start, has turned into a nice storyline, I am looking forward to the build up and match with whoever wins and Cena at Wrestlemania..

Striker as Warrior = Absolutely gold :-D. As a youngster, I just loved the Warrior (like all kids 6 and under at the time).

Masters as a Pirate, not so much of a great thing, IMO, but it looks like it could work out with proper writing.

Really good start and I like the whole concept of Refletcos rules...Although, I don't think I would go for the whole "Renee's little sister" thing.

On a lighter note, I love what you've done with resigning Matt Morgan, when he was released, I was caught well off guard. He's pretty much what I would call "Vince material", with the size, look and hopefully the eventual Mic skills, or a good mouthpiece, I could have seen the guy being huge.

Keep up the good writing :-)

Edited February 15, 2007 by cloudtheconfused

[Chris the Human]

Couple of things. First, AAE has already been in a match before. And second, I thought Khali was fired from RAW after losing to Flair?

[Chris the Human]

Smackdown opens with highlights of last week’s clash between Shawn Michaels and Kane to decide who would face Gregory Helms at No Way Out for a chance to main event Wrestlemania. Michael Cole thinks that HBK can go all the way this year, while JBL asks why Cole isn’t praising Helms for his part in the huge win over The Undertaker and Batista.

-- A Comment from Your 2007 Royal Rumble Winner --

Gregory Helms…

The 2007 Royal Rumble winner and former Cruiserweight champion, Gregory Helms comes out to the howls of the crowd. He’s again wearing his long leather coat and sunglasses, and takes his time getting into the ring and grabbing a microphone.

Helms: So, it’s going to be Shawn Michaels vs. Gregory Helms at No Way Out…

The crowd cheers

Helms: Forgive me if I don’t tremble in fear. Let me take you back to a few weeks ago at the Royal Rumble, when Gregory Helms personally eliminated The Heartbreak Kid from the Royal Rumble to claim his place in the Wrestlemania main event.

Footage is shown of Helms sliding into the ring after Michaels had eliminated Edge to presumably win the Royal Rumble, with Helms giving commentary as he eliminates Michaels from behind.

Helms: Poetry! You people can boo me all you like, but I know that your boos equal respect. You don’t boo a nobody – you boo somebody who you know in the pit of your stomach is better than you. You losers boo me because when I go home tonight, I’ll still be heading to Wrestlemania as #1 contender and I’ll still be Gregory Helms. You can’t get over the fact that when you go home tonight, you’ll still be the same forty year old virgins and sweaty fat women you always have been.

More boos

Helms: And that brings me to Shawn Michaels. Your time has passed old man. 1997 called – the want their rebel back. I can’t think of something more sickening and pathetic than a guy with a receding hairline acting like an eighteen year old rebel without a cause. At first this whole act confused me, but then I realized. It all made sense to me. You’re FORTY ONE! You're having a mid-life crisis! This DX thing isn’t you being a rebel, it’s you realizing that your time has come and gone and trying desperately to cling to that! Freud couldn’t have made a more astute observation!

The fans are positively rabid at this point. HBK chants have broken out.

Helms: So, since I’m such a humanitarian, I’m going to humour your last ditch attempt to recapture your youth. At No Way Out, I’ll face you for my spot at Wrestlemania, but don’t expect me to go easy on you because you’ve got a bad back and need a walker. Don’t expect me to feel sorry for the old man looking for one last moment in the sun. And don’t expect me to go easy on you when I put you down for the 1-2-3. I don’t care how brittle your bones are or how weak your bladder is. At No Way Out, you’re going to feel the Vertabreaker and you’re going to realize that your time has well and truly past!

He tosses down the microphone and the crowd boo him up the ramp.

RATING: 86%

-- London & Kendrick vs. Morgan & Jindrak --

Before the bell rings, we’re taken back through the recent history of these two tag teams – with Jindrak & Morgan having dogged the steps of the champions in recent weeks. We’re reminded that tonight’s clash is a non title affair. This one starts off with Paul London managing to get some good offense in on Mark Jindrak, who is the smaller man in this fearsome new tag team. An interchange of tags between the champions allows them to keep Jindrak isolated and keep Morgan out of the match, much to his agitation. Morgan’s sole involvement early on is a brutal clothesline on London from the outside – crushing the champion and giving Jindrak the opening he needs to tag his bigger partner in. Morgan dominates. He tosses the champions around like rag dolls before hitting the F-5 on Kendrick for an easy 1-2-3. The new team have just crushed the champions and they’re surely in line for a title shot now!

RATING: 71/63/80

Brian Kendrick lost overness. Matt Morgan gained overness

-- Sylvan's Big Mouth--

We return from the commercial to find Sylvan in the ring with a microphone in hand. In recent weeks, Sylvan has aligned himself with Gregory Helms and drawn the ire of a number of Smackdown superstars including Kane, The Undertaker, and Batista.

Sylvan: Last week on Smackdown I made an example of Kane. I proved that I am a dominant force on Smackdown – a rising star whose progress cannot be stopped and I begin to wonder what challenges I will set myself next? Then I saw my friend Gregory Helms beat Batista and The Undertaker last week and I got to thinking: maybe Sylvan wants some gold around his waist? Maybe it’s time for Sylvan to call out…

Sylvan’s meandering speech is interrupted as Batista’s music hits and the crowd goes absolutely crazy.

Batista: You want some gold, Sylvan? You want to be the big dog? I’ll give you that chance.

Sylvan: (Nervous) Batista, I wasn’t talking about you. I was thinking about…

Batista: I don’t give a damn who you were talking about, Sylvan. You’re a dominant force? Maybe you need to be put in your place. Maybe I need to put you in your place right now.

Teddy Long’s music hits and prevents things from getting ugly, as the Smackdown General Manager comes out and puts a calming hand on Batista’s shoulder.

Long: Sylvan, let me holla at ya, playa. Last week you crossed the line when you attacked Kane, and you best believe that I’m going to punish you for that. That’s why I’m making a match for tonight. It’ll be Sylvan vs. ‘The Animal’ Batista!

Sylvan: That’s not fair! I have beaten Kane. I have beaten Shawn Michaels and I have beaten John Cena. If I have to wrestle Batista tonight, I should get my chance at the gold!

Long: You know, you’re right, Sylvan. You have beaten some huge stars in the past few weeks, and you do deserve a title shot for that. Batista, have you got a problem with that, playa?

Batista: My gold on the line against Sylvan? Why would that be a problem?

Long and Batista leave a confused Sylvan in the ring to contemplate the repercussions of his actions.

RATING: 73%

Batista lost overness. Sylvan gained overness

-- Gangrel vs. Finlay --

This match came about after Gangrel and Finlay clashed following Chris Benoit’s match on last week’s edition of Smackdown, and Cole and JBL argue during the introductions over why Finlay sided with his long time rival, Chris Benoit. The clash itself is a remarkably good one, with Finlay able to draw out a career high performance from the former leader of The Brood. Finlay dominates much of the match with chops and his technical style, with Gangrel’s offence restricted to the occasional cheap shot followed up by something harder hitting. As it was last week, it is outside intervention that solves things, with The Boogeyman cracking his staff over Finlay’s back while the referee is distracted. Gangrel hits the Implant DDT for the 1-2-3.

RATING: 74/64/85

Gangrel gained overness. Finlay lost overness

Chris Benoit rushes out to return the favour from last week, an elbow to the back of The Boogeyman’s head putting him down. But as Benoit slides into the ring, he cops a faceful of Gangrel’s blood mist. Boogeyman, having recovered, slides into the ring and crushes Benoit with his pump-handle slam. Boogeyman and Gangrel have laid out two of the most experienced veterans on the Smackdown roster! And we're still no closer to knowing why these two hard-as-nails technical veterans are helping one another out!

-- The Booker Lifestyle --

We cut to a vignette in which King Booker and Queen Sharmell sit at the banquet table of what would appear to be an old English castle. Spread out across the table is all manner of fine delicacies, goblets of wine, and expensive cigars. Booker has one of these in his mouth as he reaches for a goblet practically brimming with a fine red wine.

Booker: I don’t know about you, Queen Sharmell, but this decadent lifestyle of ours is truly divine.

Sharmell: Indeed it is, King Booker.

She punctuates this statement by feeding him a chocolate dipped strawberry.

Booker: What say you, CM Punk?

The camera pans across to a disheveled, dirty looking man in rages. He bears only a passing resemblance to ECW’s CM Punk.

Punk: Straight edge for life!

His voice is high pitched and squeaky, like the Krusty Burger kid from The Simpsons.

Booker: Oh, CM Punk, you are indeed an amusing diversion. It will almost bring a tear to these royal eyes to see you go.

He turns to a man standing nearby in the livery of a servant.

Booker: This one bores me. Find me a new amusement.

The man nods and drags away a kicking and screaming CM Punk.

Punk: Straight edge for life! I thrive on competit….

Punk’s words are cut by the sound of a door slamming. King Booker and Queen Sharmell exchange laughs, and soon a trio of scantily clad women dance into frame.

Booker: Ah! This is something more to my tastes!

RATING: 88%

-- CM Punk & Matt Hardy vs. King Booker & William Regal --

When we return from the vignette, William Regal is already out in the ring. He applauds his King’s ‘hilarious parody’ (JBL’s words) as King Booker makes his way down to the ring. Hardy follows soon after, and CM Punk’s arrival draws a loud cheer from the Smackdown fans.

Continuing a night of so far enjoyable clashes, this match is another top shelf bout. Matt Hardy and William Regal play support roles in the feud between King Booker and CM Punk, but both are given ample opportunity to make an impression. Matt Hardy spends much of the match isolated and fighting against the odds – and the hot tag to CM Punk gets the biggest roar of the night thus far. He cleans house on the two evil-doers, a back body drop to Regal followed up with a uranage into the Anaconda Vice for King Booker. Regal makes the save only to be clotheslined out of the ring by Matt Hardy. Meanwhile, Punk has whipped Booker into the corner and is charging in for his running knee to the skull when Queen Sharmell cracks him across the face with Booker’s scepter. Punk collapses back to the mat, and Booker staggers forward to make the 1-2-3 and score a cheap win over his arch nemesis.

RATING: 79/79/80

-- Mercury’s Vision--

We’re backstage with Joey Mercury and Kristal. Michael Cole reminds fans at home that Joey Mercury will be in a four way cruiserweight title bout after the commercial.

Kristal: Joey, tonight you’ll be getting another chance at the cruiserweight title in your four way match. With Jimmy Wang Yang, Matt Striker, and Shannon Moore in the match – who are you most concerned about?

Mercury: Most ‘concerned’ about? This match up is a collection of freaks staining the prestige of the cruiserweight title. What kind of world do we live in when a crying little emo punk, a guy who thinks he’s a cowboy, and a guy who thinks he’s some washed up eighties superstar are the best the division has to offer?

Kristal: I…

Mercury: Don’t answer that. It was a rhetorical question, sweetheart. My point is that I am an elite superstar and a Hollywood icon, and it’s offensive that I am lumped into the same loose group as these losers and delusional ne’r-do-wells. Tonight, when I win that cruiserweight title, I will personally go to Theodore Long and make sure that he makes changes to the division. It’s not just about weight limits – it needs to be about a minimum level of marketability and appeal. It needs to be about the best and brightest – not the weirdest and lightest.

Joey Mercury seems fired up by this rant, and he brushes past Kristal to storm off camera.

RATING: 76%

-- Shannon Moore © vs. Joey Mercury vs. Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Matt ‘The Warrior’ Striker for the WWE Cruiserweight Title --

Things start out with the challengers teaming up against the former ECW Extremist; Moore quickly bundled out of the ring by Mercury and Striker. Wang Yang hits a springboard splash onto the champion. Joey Mercury manages to duck underneath one of Striker’s attempted big boots, and a neck breaker puts the Warrior tribute down for two. Striker puts Mercury down with an axe-handle to the back and a dropkick, only to have Wang Yang slide back into the ring and take him down with a spinning heel kick. The cowboy comes off the ropes with a springboard moonsault into the cover – but Joey Mercury drops an elbow across Yang’s back to break the fall. A swinging neck-breaker accounts for Jimmy Wang Yang, but Moore’s back in the ring. MOOREGASM! He’s put Mercury down and is covering. The Warrior drops a leg to the back of the champion’s head and rolls him over. 1-2-KICKOUT!

The champion shows fighting spirit, but it does him precious little good as he’s whipped to the ropes and Striker manages to heft him up Gorilla Press style. He can’t support his weight, though, and drops him face first into the mat. Yang’s on the top rope and a missile dropkick sends Matt Striker tumbling between the ropes and to the mat below. He stumbles to his feet in time to be rolled up by Mercury. 1-2… Moore breaks the fall, rolling Mercury up instead! 1-2-3! Shannon Moore steals a win and successfully defends his title!

RATING: 65/55/76

The Cruiserweight Title gained image

-- Gregory Helms vs. Kane --

The Big Red Machine comes out in this one with a point to prove, having to atone for both his Royal Rumble elimination and his failure to beat HBK in last week's big clash. Helms spends much of the match avoiding Kane's blows and rolling out of the ring to buy himself time, much to Kane's annoyance. Indeed, Kane doesn't really get to grips with the Royal Rumble winner until the fifth minute - when he is able to catch Helms' leg as he attempts to duck between his legs. He's set for the chokeslam, then, but a rake to the eye saves Helms' bacon. He can do precious little to save himself from eating a big boot and tasting a hard elbow to the throat, however. Kick-out at two, but Helms hasn't managed to get any legitimate offense in.

The end comes after a sustained period of Kane dominance, in which Helms is repeatedly saved by his wily ways - making excellent use of the ropes and feigning injuries to buy himself time. One such ploy sees him play possum in the corner, only to blatantly thumb Kane's eye. The Big Red Machine stumbles into the referee, momentarily distracting him, and Helms is able to football punt the monster in the crotch! Kane drops to his feet and eats a Shining Wizard, and Helms makes the cover with his feet on the top rope. 1-2-3! Helms steals a win!

RATING: 84/86/81

-- A Rebuttal --

Helms' celebrations are short lived, however, as Shawn Michaels hits the ring! Helms attempts to clobber him with a clothesline, but Michaels ducks underneath it and kicks Helms in the gut. He's hauling his No Way Out opponent up onto his shoulders. VERTABREAKER! Helms has just been made to taste the very move he promised to treat Michaels to at No Way Out! Shawn Michaels soaks up the crowd's adulation as we go to commercial. Helms got the win, but he's the beaten man here!

RATING: 93%

Gregory Helms gained overness

-- Sylvan vs. Batista © for the World Heavyweight Championship --

There's no shortage of support for Batista here tonight, and Sylvan's recent alignment with Gregory Helms has made him a target of much hatred for the fans. A 'Go back to Canada' chant starts up before the two big men have even had a chance to lock up. When they do lock up, however, it is Batista who gains the upper hand - shoving Sylvan hard to the mat. A second tie up ends in the same fashion. A third, however, sees Sylvan break out and slap Batista in a blatant sign of disrespect. Batista lets it settle for a moment before responding with a hard right that absolutely floors the challenger. He's back up for more, but goes right back down. Batista plants him with a running powerslam into the corner, and then crushes him on the mat. Cover, but Sylvan kicks out at two.

The champion continues to dominate for some time, beating the cocky young French Canadian from pillar to post. Indeed, he seems almost reluctant to make a pin, and twice forgoes a pinning predicament in favour of putting more of a beating on the challenger. The second time he does this bites him, as Sylvan pulls up after being whipped to the ropes and delivers a hard kick to Batista's jaw. A swinging neckbreaker gives Sylvan his first pinning predicament of the match, and he holds onto the advantage with a series of rest holds and dirty shots for a few minutes. Ultimately, though, he's no match for Batista. Coming off the ropes, he's surprised with a spinebuster and Batista shakes the ropes. Thumbs up? Thumbs down! Batista Bomb! 1-2-3! Batista picks up the win and Sylvan's been taught a valuable lesson in respect!

RATING: 76/76/73

Batista's celebrations are interrupted by the dimming lights and the tolling of The Undertaker's music. The Dead Man is at the top of the ramp and he points to Batista's gold. He mouths the words No Way Out, and Batista doesn't look nearly as confident.

OVERALL: 76%

BEST SEGMENT: Shawn Michaels' appearance

WORST SEGMENT: Cruiserweight Title Four Way

MOTN: Finlay vs. Gangrel

BIGGEST POP: The Undertaker

MOST HEAT: Gregory Helms

Edited February 18, 2007 by Misanthrope

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

Notice to the fans:

-The Misanthrope did NOT follow any of the rules he was given on this show.

As Misanthrope does receive special perks for shows where he succeeds, so too must he get problems for not fulfilling any rules in a show. Because of this, he will get a punishment rule given to him imminently.

[Chris the Human]

Raw Preview

There are a lot of unanswered questions following last week's edition of Raw, and everyone will be looking for answers this week. The big question on everybody's lips is: "Who saved Ric Flair last week?" The Nature Boy will be in the house to try and get some answers, and will be in the ring for the in ring debut of Armando Alejandro Estrada in a match he requested himself.

Kevin Nash has been in a thorn in the side of Shane McMahon since his debut as Donald Trump's representative, and McMahon has vowed to do something about it this week. Nash makes his in ring debut to take on Ace Trump - but McMahons never play fair, and you can bet it won't go down as a straight clash.

We'll also see Mickie James defend her Women's Title against Victoria, Chris Masters & Paul Burchill pairing up against the newly named team SNM (Steven Idol and Johnny Nitro), and a huge main event that pitches John Cena and Randy Orton against The Great Khali and Orton's former ally, Edge.

In addition to all of this, Shawn Michaels and Gregory Helms will be present to sign the contract for their upcoming match at No Way Out. There's no love lost between these two - and you can bet it won't be a simple signing when they're both in the ring together.

ECW on Sci-Fi Preview

Since eliminating Carlito at the Royal Rumble, RVD has been dogged by the self professed 'Coolest Man in the WWE', Carlito. Tonight Mr. Tuesday Night finally gets an opportunity to get his hands on Carlito - and you know that the two will tear the house down in order to beat their hated opponent.

Marquis Cor Van will back up his upset win over Bobby Lashley last week with a clash against ECW original, Tommy Dreamer. Can the Alpha Male continue to impress and push his claim for a World Title shot?

Plus we'll see James Gibson clashing with Little Guido, CM Punk taking on William Regal in reprisal for Regal's role in last week's Smackdown tag match, and the New Age Punisher makes his ECW in ring debut when he takes on Balls Mahoney.

Smackdown Preview

The count-down continues towards No Way Out and this week's episode of Smackdown offers some mouth-watering clashes as the Smackdown superstars continue to prepare what will undoubtedly be a brutal pay-per-view. In a huge main event, Gregory Helms will face off against The Undertaker in a clash that could very well preview the Wrestlemania Main Event. Will The Dead Man stand tall? Or will Helms manage to steal another win and continue his rare streak of wins?

Chris Benoit & Finlay have been forced into an unsteady alliance of late, and tonight it will be tested to the limit when the two veterans pair up against Gangrel & The Boogeyman. Are they truly on the same page? Or will old habits die hard for the fighting Irishman?

Plus we'll see Matt Hardy and William Regal follow up last week's tag team clash with a singles bout, Sylvan clashes with Vito, and Paul London squares off against Mark Jindrak, the man who has made the tag champions' lives hell since arriving on the scene with the dominant Matt Morgan.

Edited February 19, 2007 by Misanthrope

[Chris the Human]

-- Escalation --

Here comes the money…. Here comes the money

Shane McMahon is on his way out to the ring with Drew Damage and Ace Trump at his side, the stand-in general manager of Raw looks unhappy as the big screen replays Ric Flair’s epic victory over Umaga last week. He scowls as Kevin Nash appears on the screen to fire Umaga.

Shane: Donald Trump is an egomaniacal coward.

The crowd boos

Shane: Why else would he choose to continue to meddle in McMahon family business even after my father had to go away? Why else would he send somebody else to do his dirty work for him? Well, tonight Kevin Nash I am going to deal with the Kevin Nash situation – which is something I should have done weeks ago. You see, tonight I’m making a match. It’s going to be Kevin Nash up against… Ace Trump!

Trump doesn’t look at all pleased at this, and immediately begins to plead with his boss. Shane seems unmoved.

Shane: Quit acting like a God damn baby, Ace. It’s only Kevin Nash. I’d do it myself if the doctors hadn’t told me I won’t be able to wrestle again. You do this, Trump, and I’ll give you anything you want. You want a title shot? You’ve got it. You want a night with Torrie Wilson? I’ll arrange it. Just beat Kevin Nash tonight and make sure the son of a bitch doesn’t come back.

His piece said, Shane McMahon leaves a stunned Ace Trump and an amused Drew Damage in the ring.

RATING: 88%

-- Mickie James © vs. Victoria for the Women’s Championship --

This is a fairly unremarkable women’s title clash between the two only real mainstays of the division left in the company. Victoria gets off some good offence early on, but the clash is clearly hear to highlight Mickie James’ abilities, and she’s able to pick up the pinfall after the tornado DDT.

RATING: 64/65/67

The Women’s Title gained in image

-- A Challenge --

Mickie James is still standing atop the turnbuckle celebrating when Melina’s music hits and Raw’s premier diva appears at the top of the ramp with Johnny Nitro and Steven Idol at her side.

Melina: Bravo, Mickie. What a wonderful job! But the fact remains that you continue to avoid the #1 diva in the WWE. Any scrub can beat Victoria, but that’s why you chose to let her have a title shot, isn’t it? Next week I want…

The pirate themed music of Paul Burchill hits, but it’s Candice Michelle who comes out. She’s again looking all kinds of fine.

Candice: Hold on a second. The WWE’s #1 diva? Please! I don’t recall seeing your face on the front cover of Playboy, Melina. You’re just an interesting ring entrance and a high pitched scream.

Johnny Nitro and Steven Idol move as if to approach Candice, but Kelly Kelly’s music hits and the former ECW diva appears. JR and Lawler remind us that Kelly Kelly won a #1 contender’s match upon her debut.

Kelly: I don’t want to interrupt, girls, but didn’t I win…

But now The Coach is on his way out, Raw’s executive consultant not trying to hide the fact he’s admiring the view as he snatches a microphone from Candice.

Coach: Hold on a damn second! Now, it seems to me we’ve got the makings of a big match for next week right here. We’ve got one champion and three ladies who think they can beat her – that sounds like a four way to me!

Lawler loves that.

Coach: Now, I know Kelly won a #1 contender’s match last week, but I think both Melina and Candice make excellent cases. And I don’t think the fans would object to seeing all four of these lovely ladies in the ring at once.

Coach gets a career high pop for the suggestion. Candice looks happy with the decision, while the others aren’t so impressed. But The Coach has spoken, and it looks like we’ve got a big women’s title match next week on Raw!

-- The Mystery --

Ric Flair is backstage with Arn Anderson. A scattered Horseman chant begins in the crowd.

Anderson: I wish I could tell you more, Ric, I really do. But I had nothing to do with that mystery man. I was out there to make sure you weren’t screwed out of the company, and apparently this other guy had the same thing in mind.

Flair: And you know I appreciate it, Arn. But you know me, I can’t just take this guy at face value. I need to know what he wants with The Nature Boy. Woo!

Anderson: And I’ll keep looking into it, I promise. But for now you’ve got a match to get ready for. Don’t forget that.

Flair: Forget that snake in the grass? The man who did his level best to put the dirtiest player in the game out of the game for good? I may be getting old, but I’m not losing my memory just yet. Woo! Tonight, the Nature Boy is going to break Estrada’s ankle and then I’m going to go after the head of the snake. I’m going to go after Shane McMahon and I’m going make him wish he’d never, ever messed with The Nature Boy. Woo!

The camera leaves the room, but catches sight of movement as it moves through the doorway. A man in a long, black coat is seen fleeing the scene. Could that be the mystery man?

RATING: 96%

Ric Flair gained overness

-- Chris Masters & Paul Burchill vs. SNM --

We’re seeing the ‘debut’ of two new tag teams here, as the pirate pairing of Paul Burchill and Chris Masters prepares to take on Steven Idol and Johnny Nitro. We start off with Burchill up against Nitro, and it’s the former Intercontinental Champion who gets control of things early. Together, he and Idol are able to isolate the pirate captain, much to the annoyance of Candice at ringside and Masters in the corner. A near fall comes to Nitro after he super kicks Burchill in the mouth, but somehow he’s able to kick out. A whip to the ropes sees Burchill showing remarkable agility to leap-frog the charging Nitro – and an arm drag sends Nitro skidding out to the floor. Burchill is moving to make the tag when his ankle is grabbed by Idol – but the enzuguri puts Idol down and the tag is made.

Masters comes in with a vengeance – leveling Idol with a Polish hammer before putting Nitro down with a back-breaker and covering for two. Idol again attempts to intervene, but is put to the ground with a full nelson slam that shakes the ring. Nitro’s stumbled to his feet as Masters signals for the Masterlock, synching it in and getting the crowd going as he shakes Nitro around like a rag doll. Nitro shoves backwards with his feet, pushing Masters towards his corner. While Masters doesn’t relinquish the hold, Idol manages to make a blind tag unbeknownst to the Masterpiece. As Nitro looks to give up the fight, Idol collects Masters across the back of the head with an elbow. He releases Nitro, who slumps to the ground. Burchill’s in the ring and charging to his friend’s aid, but Nitro has the presence of mind to trip him up! Burchill’s pounding on Idol in the corner while Nitro puts Burchill to the mat with a hard kick to the jaw. The crowd jeers as Masters turns around and walks right into a superkick! Idol with the roll-up. 1-2-3! SNM have stolen a victory after some excellent tag team work!

RATING: 62/62/77

Chris Masters debuted his new gimmick (Bad Ass), it got a positive response. Steven Idol debuted his new gimmick (High Society), it got a positive response. Steven Idol gained overness

-- Super Crazy vs. Jeff Hardy © for the Intercontinental Championship --

We return from the break as Super Crazy makes his way down to the ring for his title shot against Jeff Hardy. Fans are expecting something special and get just that – with the two workers pulling out some exciting spots in a short, fast paced match. Super Crazy steals the show with a number of inventive springboard moves – but one lands him in trouble, the champion ducking underneath an attempted springboard moonsault, kicking Crazy in the gut, and laying him out with the Twist of Fate. A swanton bomb from the top gets the 1-2-3, and Hardy retains to the delight of the crowd.

His celebration doesn’t have time to kick off though, as somebody slides into the ring. It’s Vladimir Kozlov! The Russian mixed martial artist is again sticking his nose into Hardy’s business. He kicks the champion hard in the gut and hefts him up to his shoulders. TNA fans know it as a Muscle Buster, but the commentary team calls it From Russia with Love. Hardy’s again been laid out by this Russian superstar!

RATING: 66/67/81

-- Dissent in Rated RKO? --

Edge is backstage flirting with Maria when he is shoved from behind by Randy Orton.

Orton: What the hell, Edge? What the hell is going on with you!?

Edge: Randy! I’ve been looking for you, bro. I just wanted to apologise for…

Orton: For Spearing me last week? Forgive me if I don’t immediately accept your apology, Edge. Seems to be becoming a nasty habit of yours.

Edge: I understand that you’re mad, Randy, but believe me when I say it was just an overreaction on my part. You know how much the tag titles meant to me. It’s just frustrating when you lose us…

Orton: When I lose us the titles!? You saw the finish just as well as I did. We were screwed. Charlie Haas got a handful of tights and he rolled me up. Where were you, anyway? Why weren’t you in there to break it up? Huh?

Maria is looking more than a little awkward as the two former friends and sometime allies get in each others faces.

Edge: I was busy with Shelton. I thought you’d be able to handle Charlie on your own. Obviously I was wrong.

Orton: Oh, that’s hilarious, Edge. Really funny, seriously.

Orton plays up his amusement and then unleashes a right hand on Edge! Maria’s bowled over as the two tag team partners tumble to the ground fighting. Suddenly Shane McMahon is in the room, his security crew dragging the two apart.

Shane: God damn it, I don’t need this! I’ve got enough problems with Trump without you two idiots going at it. You want one another so bad? Fine! Tonight it will be Randy Orton vs. Edge one on one.

Edge: Fine!

Orton: Sounds good to me.

Shane and his goons stalk off, McMahon clearly unhappy with the chaos that has dogged his time as general manager of Raw. Moments later, after Edge and Orton have also departed; Maria’s meek voice speaks up.

Maria: Hello? Little help?

RATING: 88%

-- Kevin Nash vs. Ace Trump --

Ace Trump is out first, paper money raining from the roof as the Donald Trump ‘tribute’ comes out looking far from overjoyed at the match he’s been given. And when Kevin Nash’s music hits and the crowd roars, he has even more reason to be unhappy with his employer. The match itself is short, with Trump unable to get any legitimate offence off against the much bigger man. Nash picks up a win after less than three minutes following a Jack-knife Powerbomb.

Drew Damage hits the ring immediately after the bell with a chair in hand, cracking it across Nash’s back and dropping the former World Champion to his knees. He comes off the ropes with a brutal lariat that knocks Nash down and out. Trump and Damage stand tall over the fallen Nash as we go to commercial.

RATING: 59/64/68

Ace Trump debuted his new gimmick (Rich Snob), it got a positive response. Drew Damage debuted his new gimmick (Bodyguard), it got a positive response

-- No Meal Ticket --

We return from commercial to find Josh Matthews with Armando Alejandro Estrada, the man who last week saw his charge, Umaga fired after he failed to beat Ric Flair in a Loser Leaves Town match.

Josh: Armando, tonight you step into the ring to face Ric Flair, the man who last week ensured that Umaga was fired. Aren’t you intimidated?

Estrada: Intimidated by that old man? You must be crazy, haha. I may have made my name as Umaga’s handler, but I am more than a match for a near senile old man like Flair, haha. Tonight you will see that Armando Alejandro Estrada is the real deal, haha.

RATING: 73%

Armando Alejandro Estrada gained overness

-- Ric Flair vs. Armando Alejandro Estrada --

The bell rings on this one but we don’t see any action for a minute or so, Estrada employing various tactics to avoid tying up with Flair. At first it’s stretching in the corner, then it’s rolling out of the ring to remove an expensive watch, and finally it’s feigning a tweaked nerve in his leg. The last time sees him take a thumb to the eye from Flair and a series of brutal chops to back him into the corner.

The match from here is one sided, Flair dominating the man who looked to have him fired last week for much of the match. Estrada isn’t completely buried, however, managing to get off some offence in the form of Flair’s famous ‘botched’ moves. Flair carries the day, however, forcing Estrada to tap out to the Figure Four leg lock after 5:11.

RATING: 63/78/56

-- The Contract Signing --

Gregory Helms…

The 2007 Royal Rumble winner, Gregory Helms makes his way down to the ring with Sylvan at his side. JR and The King hype up the fact that we’ll be seeing Gregory Helms and Shawn Michaels sign the contract that will confirm their match at No Way Out. Helms joins Jonathan Coachman, Theodore Long, Pat Patterson, and Gerald Briscoe in the ring. But the crowd’s cheers are reserved for the arrival of Shawn Michaels – whose ovation brings the house down as he plays to the crowd and struts down to the ring.

Coach: Alright, boys, you know what to do here. Let’s just get the signatures on the paper and get this over with. I don’t like this ‘parasite’ sucking up air-time on my show.

The ‘parasite’ he refers to is Smackdown General Manager, Theodore Long. For his part, he simply shakes his head and smiles.

Helms: You know what? I don’t want to sign this contract. It’s outrageous that I am being forced to defend something I rightfully won just because Shawn Michaels is a sore loser. I don’t remember seeing a disclaimer on the Royal Rumble that allows every failure and washed up former champion to demand a match against the winner. Tell me this, Coach, why should I let Shawn Michaels have a match against me at No Way Out?

Coach: Well… I….

HBK: Let me field this one Johnny Boy. I can call you Johnny Boy, right?

Coach: I’d rather…

HBK: Thanks, Johnny Boy. (To Helms) Why should you let me have a match against you at No Way Out for my chance to claim my rightful place in the Wrestlemania Main Event? (Pause) Because if you don’t I will kick your head right off your shoulders!

The crowd roars their appreciation. Helms steps backwards and Sylvan interposes himself in between Helms and HBK.

HBK: A demonstration? Sure!

Before Sylvan has time to react, HBK steps forward and lays him out with Sweet Chin Music! The crowd goes crazy!

HBK: Am I making sense? Or do I need to give you another demonstration?

Helms: Listen here you washed up old…

HBK snaps another Sweet Chin Music, this time taking the head of The Coach and sending papers flying into the air.

HBK: I’m running out of targets here, Gregory. Did you want to call out some friends? Or should I just start tuning up the band for you?

Helms puts up his hands.

Helms: Alright, alright! I’ll sign the contract. But only because I’ve got pressing business. You wouldn’t believe the parties I’ve been invited to since I won the Royal Rumble. I don’t want to be here all night debating this with you.

He gingerly steps within kicking range of Shawn Michaels and puts his name down on the contract. HBK smiles and does the same. The two No Way Out opponents stare one another down before HBK moves as if to hit Helms with Sweet Chin Music. Helms flinches away and rolls to the outside, while Michaels hasn’t moved from where he stood. He gives Helms a cocky grin as the Smackdown superstar retreats up the ramp and talks trash.

RATING: 90%

-- Feeling Left Out –

You Think You Know Me…

Edge surges out of the fog with his black trench-coat and wraparound sunglasses on to the boos of the crowd, the Rated R Superstar preparing to take on fellow Rated RKO member, Randy Orton. However, while Edge waits in the ring and Randy Orton is making his way down the ramp – John Cena’s music hits and the crowd roars as the WWE Champion makes an appearance.

Cena: Hold on a minute. Hold on a minute. Hold on a DAMN MINUTE! Last week I said Raw was going to the dogs, and this week I know it is. We’ve got a show and there’s no room for the champion!? Instead we get to see Episode Fourteen of ‘Edge and Randy Orton’s Will They or Won’t They Romance’? Not happening! Either I get in on this match or I come down there, beat the crap out of both of you, and make my own match.

Here comes the money!

Shane McMahon’s out now, and he doesn’t look at all pleased.

Shane: I am sick and tired of this. Now I know why my father had to take a break. This is infuriating! Cena, you want in on the match? Fine! You can team with Orton.

Edge: This is bullshit! This is just the kind of crap I’ve had to endure throughout my career. You want to see me take these two on by myself? I should…

Shane: I wasn’t done, Edge. Cena and Orton will be teaming with you and… THE GREAT KHALI!

-- Edge & The Great Khali vs. Randy Orton & John Cena --

There’s some uneasiness in this match – with Cena warily eying Orton as he prepares to start the match against Edge. These two have a history, and it shows in the early going as the two turn on a fine brawl that see-saws backwards and forwards for the opening period. Edge eventually tags out to The Great Khali, who immediately begins to dominate Cena with his astonishing variety of overhand chops and head butts. Cena sells like crazy, but can’t get to his corner to tag in Orton. To be fair, though, Orton doesn’t look all that keen to tangle with Khali.

Cena is beaten from pillar to post before he’s able to duck underneath an attempted big boot and come back with a flying shoulder block. Khali staggers back into the ropes and Cena hits him with a series of clotheslines. He won’t go down. A top rope dropkick, however, manages to stagger Khali enough that Cena can make the hot tag to Orton. The former legend killer doesn’t look overjoyed at being put into the match – but he goes after Khali with a series of hard rights and chops. An attempted whip to the corner is reversed and Khali steamrolls in, but Orton sidesteps the attack – sending Khali chest first into the turnbuckle. RKO! Orton goes up for the RKO, but Khali catches him and tosses him across the ring like a rag doll! He drags Orton to his feet and lifts him up by the throat for the choke bomb, but Cena dives in and takes Khali’s legs out from underneath him. Orton covers, but Edge breaks it up at two. Orton and Edge stare one another down, but neither moves to attack the other. Instead, Khali gets to his feet and lays Orton out with another overhand chop.

He tags out to Edge, who stands ready to deliver the Spear while his former partner staggers to his feet. Cena’s crying out a warning and Orton hears it! He dives to the right and Edge spears the post! Cena drops a few forearms onto Edge’s back for good measure, and Orton moves into place to roll his former partner up! 1-2-kickout! Edge kicks out. Orton smartly tags out to Cena, who goes right after Edge with punches. A whip is followed up by the blue thunder driver. He’s dusting off his shoulder. FIVE KNUCKLE SHUFFLE! Cena covers. 1-2-NO! Khali’s in and he drops a big size seventeen boot onto Cena’s back! Cena’s to his feet. CHOKE BOMB! Khali absolutely buries Cena in the mat. Orton remains on the apron as Edge gets to his feet. SPEAR! Cena’s been brutally beaten by both members of the opposition and Orton hasn’t stepped in! Edge covers. 1-2-3! Edge and Khali score a win over Cena and Orton, but Orton could have saved it!

Edge turns to Orton, but the legend killer isn’t sticking around. He drops down off the apron and leaves to the booing of the crowd, only pausing to look back at his confused former tag partner as he and Khali stand over the unmoving Cena.

RATING: 65/78/64

The Great Khali gained overness.

OVERALL: 73%

BEST SEGMENT: Ric Flair promo

WORST SEGMENT: Kevin Nash vs. Ace Trump

MOTN: Jeff Hardy vs. Super Crazy

BIGGEST POP: Ric Flair

MOST HEAT: Gregory Helms

[Kyle_]

Other than a few coding errors, it was a good show. And Edge said "bullshit". I really like how Helms is developing, and even being the HBK mark that I am, I hope Helms keeps his WM spot.

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

At a glance:

No rules were directly passed in this one, but there were some buildup for future rules in it...

[Chris the Human]

Other than a few coding errors, it was a good show.

Edited February 21, 2007 by Misanthrope

[Kyle_]

You didn't bold something and HBK's name was both red and blue.

Anyways, decent show but too many matches. And Noble/Guido getting 100%?

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

The rules that Misanthrope succeeded in with this match were:

-Tommy Suede must be promoted. Misanthrope gets the right to determine where he goes and how he is used.

-Upon his release from WSX, Genki Horiguchi must be hired by WWE and assigned to ECW. Misanthrope was allowed to use Arsenic for this rule.

-Website update

From: www.whackedOutwrestling.com- All the rumors that are too whacked Out to print!

-Well, it's time for another random update from the person with all the dirt behind the scenes for the professional wrestling world today, Tommy Goddard. Let's get started with the rumors, shall we?

-In WWE, the biggest news story going around is the new regime in World Wrestling Entertainment. With the world not seeing Vince McMahon since he did not appear at the Royal Rumble, people are beginning to suspect the worse. In any case, if smark faves will get a fair shake like CM Punk and Gregory Helms are- who cares about if Vince McMahon is still around?

-WWE discovered a shocking relapse over the weekend of one of its superstars in rehab. One positive of the new era is their willingness to pay for its workers to go to rehab if its needed. However, there was a reported misfire during rehab last week. Apparently, Linda McMahon went to the rehab center in Texas where WWE Legend "The American Dream" Dusty Rhodes was cleaning out, only to discover Rhodes's longtime friend and sometime rival, wrestling legend Abdullah the Butcher there with him. This was not seen as a major problem- until rehab officials had to restrain Rhodes during this meeting after it was discovered that Abby brought with him three large coolers filled with ribs, causing Rhodes to go into a frenzy.

There are some bonuses for this, however- afterwards, Linda was seen snacking on a few of Abby's ribs as the two began talking.

-More news is going on for the WM 23 card of possible matches. Already, there are reports that some WWE legends have been approached to rework their classic matches on the card. wOw.com has already learned that WWE has been in talks with former World Champion Randy Savage in a claim rumored to be about having Savage reprise his classic Wrestlemania 3 match with Ricky Steamboat. This follows the rumors of other WM3 matches being reprised, the most common one being a rematch between former WWE Superstars The Iron Sheik and B.Brian Blair.

-It was reported earlier this week on "Bubba the Love Sponge" that Hulk Hogan is still debating talks with WWE for a match at WM 23. Hogan was reportedly very dead-set on the new era giving him a rematch with WWE Hall of Famer Andre the Giant at the show. Hogan reportedly was very angry at the new head of WWE after the man told Hogan that Andre had been dead for 14 years, after which Hogan claimed "It wasn't 14 years- he was dead during the WM3 match and I bodyslammed his corpse as it weighed one metric ton in front of 2.5 million people, BROTHER!"

-The WWE has already seemed to get much older than it was before, as a number of legends on the roster have been added. Rumors are circulating that the WWE has entered into talks with Ricky Morton to reform the Rock and Roll Express, for one. In addition, former stars and WWE officials Mike Rotundo and Barry Windham have been approached with regards to coming out of retirement.

This isn't the only place WWE's trying to get legends, however: Reports out of an NWA Shockwave show claim that Lex Luger refused to job recently under the claim that he was going back to the WWE. When called on this claim and when he would debut, all Lex responded with was "I DON'T KNOOOOOOOOOOOOW!" In addition, conservative talk show pundit Warrior made headlines by saying he was in negotiations to return to the WWE to clean up the filth on their shows. (Sources at WWE claim if he comes back, it would likely be short-term to help put over Matt Striker.)

This news has already met with problems in the wrestling world. Former WWE and WCW superstar and noted gay man Chris Kanyon has vilified the WWE for planning to bring back a person who was proven to be so homophobic like the Ultimate Warrior. Kanyon then went on to claim that if the WWE had any real attempts to think forward, they would rehire Kanyon and give the world proof that "a man can be homosexual and still compete on a high level in World Wrestling Entertainment." Sylvan was unavailable for comment.

In TNA news recently, the firing of Kevin Nash has caused a number of lower-card stars to be morose, specifically in the X-Division. Most of the X-Division wrestlers felt that Nash was the only reason that Vince Russo would put them on TV, and there were reports that there were morale problems in TNA (that were exacerbated from Sting's recent retirement, feeling Sting's Christian beliefs helped keep Vince Russo strong and grounded.) This was not just kept to the X-Division wrestlers: Christian Cage was reportedly quite unhappy that Russo planned to abruptly turn him face and give sermons in the main event segment of every TNA Impact, Christopher Daniels was reportedly unhappy at Russo's claim to turn him into a Satanic heel and lose every match following random jobbers defeating him after joining with Cage, and Rhino has been unhappy over the fact that Russo planned to have him hit his head and believe that he was a legitimate animal who would only be able to converse with the "animal whisperer", Shark Boy.

However, these problems have reportedly finally reached the boiling point in TNA. wOw.com can now confirm that over the past week, TNA superstars Jay Lethal, Alex Shelley, and Sonjay Dutt have asked for their release from TNA. This likely explains the loss by the three PCS stars to Chris Sabin, Austin Starr, and Senshi in a Dildo on a Pole match on Impact last week. According to a source close to TNA, there are reports these three may not be the last to go.

It is unsure whether the three will go, as Lethal and Shelley have apparently been unnecessary in Ring of Honor. However, rumors circulate that all three men have been booked for WSX tapings in April.

[Kyle_]

Hilarous update. I love the added backstory that is full of the jokes.

[Chris the Human]

March rolled around and found me face down on my desk, paper glued to my face with drool, and a half empty bottle of JD gripped in one outstretched hand. I didn’t have to be in the office, of course, but ever since I had stupidly leaked my address onto EWB – I’d been mobbed by aspiring writers with ‘brilliant’ ideas.

“ZOMG,” one had said, “We hire AJ Styles, Christopher Daniels, and Samoa Joe”.

“Go on…” I’d said, foolishly.

“And we push them to the moon. It’s money!”

I’d had Vinnie and Jax on security beat him a little before sending him on his way. Nothing that would land me in trouble, mind you, just some shots to the kidneys and a rather brutal strapping. Cop that, K-Dogg.

To be completely honest, I was up to my ears in bad suggestions.

“Hire the Headbangers”

“Push Viscera”

“Book a six month Great Khali baby face world title run”

In the end, I’d just stopped taking Hunter’s calls. I was having enough trouble with Vince.

A knock on my door jarred me from my semi conscious state. Who the fuck was coming by my office at midnight? I hadn’t promised any more colossal pushes to any divas, and I’d already politely refused Pat Patterson’s offer of a super slippery lap dance in exchange for a rise.

“What?” I hoped my voice sounded intimidating, but I think it came out more as ‘tired’. The door opened and a veritable posse of eight workers entered my office. From the nervous way seven of them carried themselves, they were developmental talent. The eighth, he walked in and took a swig from the bottle of JD as if he owned the place.

“Teddy Hart, I presume?”

“Fucking eh,” he said with a cocky grin, “You got any pot around here?”

I did, but I said I didn’t. Christopher Lawler had told me he wouldn’t be able to get me any new stuff once we got into Canada.

“No biggie,” he assured me, “We were just coming by to talk about this new administration we’ve heard so much about. Seems to me you’re a smart guy and you’re pushing the right guys. We were wondering if maybe we could all get called up to the main roster. I think you’ll find most of us have what it takes”.

I wondered which of their number he didn’t think would make an impact. Van Hammer’s eyes remained firmly on his feet.

“Sure,” I said after a few seconds of mulling it over, “Consider yourselves promoted. Now get out of my office. Except you, Teddy and Harry – I need to talk to you”.

Van Hammer, Mike Kruel, Jimmy Jacobs, Claudio Castagnoli, John Walters, Roughhouse O’Reilly, and Van Hammer file out of my office – leaving me with Teddy Hart and Harry Smith – two guys I’ve got very big plans in store for…

----------------------------

As per Reflecto’s Rules, I promoted all workers who achieved 40 or more over, and any who requested a promotion (Mike Kruel). In addition to this, I had to hire eight more workers to place into development. These workers were: EXesS, Kevin Martel, Mikey Hendersen, Azrael, Shemus, Daniel Puder, Gary Steele, and Mickie Knuckles.

Edited February 22, 2007 by Misanthrope

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

The rules that Misanthrope succeeded with were as follows:

1- Everyone who made 40 overness or asked out of development for February had to be promoted. (As reward, he got to choose his 8 replacements.)

2- Michelle McCool must turn face.

3- Johnny must be promoted. He must turn face, be assigned to Smackdown, and given a push as Michelle McCool's new client.

[Kyle_]

Great show/backstory, and the shorter matches are fine by me.

[daileyxplanet]

One thing I have to say about the new format is cut out so much smark-ness as it smacks of indy diaries, which isn't a bad thing, but for the WWE it seems off.

[Chris the Human]

Note: I'll probably go back to the original format after this. Just got a busy day ahead of me, but wanted to get an update up

Raw Report

Date: March 5th, 2007

Location: amyway Arena, Orlando

Report By: SecondCitySaint

Just got back from the Raw show in Orlando and it was a 50/50 kind of affair. Some very good matches (Edge vs. Flair and a remarkably good Kozlov/Eugene affair) but some absolute trash as well (the main event). Still not sold on this new regime, but here we go.

-- Tired of the Arrogance --

The show opened with Edge making his way out to the ring. We're shown highlights of last week's Edge/Khali vs. Cena/Orton match, focussing on the fact Orton didn't make the save when he could have. Edge says that he knew he could trust Randy Orton, and last week Orton proved that Rated RKO was far from dead. He also proved that he was more than a match for John Cena, and it was offensive that he was being left out of World Title figurings in favour of Shawn Michaels. The crowd went nuts for the mention of his name. Tonight, he's calling out Shawn Michaels and he wants a chance to show the world that he's the bigger man and the better wrestler but...

WOO!

Ric Flair comes out to a tremendous ovation. He says that he's sick and tired of hearing Edge tell everybody how great he is. To be the best, you gotta beat the best, and it's been a long time since Edge has been in the ring with the best. That's why tonight Flair wants a match against Edge. In the past few weeks he's beaten Umaga and The Great Khali - and he can beat Edge too. No word on whether or not Edge accepts, but Flair's music hits and the Nature Boy plays to the crowd.

RATING: 90%

-- Eugene vs. Vladimir Kozlov --

Scary as it may seem, this clash actually ended up being MOTN. Don't be to afraid, though, as it was more an indication of the weakness of the card than the quality of the bout. Eugene being here after weeks of not being on TV tips us off to the squash, and that's what we get. Eugene barely gets off any offence as he's thrown around, choked, and then crushed with From Russia With Love. The 1-2-3 gets a win after about five minutes.

Kozlov is to his feet to celebrate when Jeff Hardy comes off the top turnbuckle, a dropkick sending Kozlov into the ropes. He stumbles back into a Twist of Fate. After weeks of being stalked by the Russian mixed-martial artist, Hardy's scored a measure of revenge! Kozlov and Hardy aren't done, though, and the two battle out of the ring and through the crowd to the cheers of the crowd.

RATING: 64/54/75

Vladimir Kozlov gained overness from this match

-- RIP Eugene --

After Kozlov and Hardy have left the ring, Eugene gets up with help from the referee. He isn't happy, though. Not retarded unhappy, either, he looks downright pissed off. He grabs a microphone and, in a completely regular voice, says he's sick to death of this bullshit. For almost three years now he's been playing an offensive, stupid character to please the WWE fans. He's been degrading himself each and every week by putting on comedy matches and he gets absolutely no respect. He asks if the crowd knows he was an eight time Ohio Valley Wrestling champion? If they know he was once compared to Chris Benoit? Well, tonight it ends (apparently). Tonight Eugene is dead, and we'll all get to meet Nick Dinsmore. He grabs something out of his coat pocket. It's a set of clippers. He shaves his head but keeps the beard. He tosses the Eugene jacket to the crowd and leaves. The crowd don't make much of a reaction. Some cheer and some boo. Most are quiet.

RATING: 69%

-- Recruitment? --

A backstage segment aired next, with the crowd largely cheering for John Cena as soon as he appears on screen. Kevin Nash's arrival gets a smaller cheer. He says he was impressed with how John Cena stood up last week despite his partner stabbing him in the back, and that he's been watching Cena's title run the last year and he's very impressed. He also said he was watching when Cena went to war with Vince McMahon, and he thinks the two of them have a lot in common. They both know what it's like to be the outsider, and they both know what it's like to have a crowd turn against them. But, ultimately, they both know how to make life hell for the guys in power. He wants to know if Cena wants to help him make life hell for Vince and Shane McMahon.

Before Cena can answer, though, Shane McMahon and The Great Khali barge into the room. Shane wants to know what the hell is going on. Nash responds that it's nothing. They were just talking. Shane doesn't buy it. He thinks Nash is trouble and he knows how to deal with trouble. Tonight it will be Nash against Ace Trump, Drew Damage, and The Great Khali in a handicap match. But Cena doesn't think that's fair and he tells Shane as much. Shane agrees. He puts Cena in the match as Nash's partner and leaves laughing.

RATING: 77%

-- Steven Idol vs. Chris Masters --

Idol's accompanied to the ring by Johnny Nitro and Melina, while Masters is accompanied by Paul Burchill and the unbelievably attractive Candice Michelle in all her pirate whore glory. Masters is in squash mode here, and he throws the smaller Idol around like a rag doll for most of this clash. The return of the Polish Hammer to his repetoire brings some pretty impressive results, and he goes through the motions with a press slam and the delayed vertical suplex before preparing to lock in the Master Lock. But Melina is up on the apron to distract the referee. Candice comes across and yanks Melina's legs out from underneath her - causing her to bang her face on the apron. Nitro grabs Candice as if to hit her, but Burchill spins him around and drops him with a hard right hand. All of the chaos has also distracted Masters, who goes over to investigate. While he's doing that, Idol removes the padding from the far turnbuckle just as the referee and Masters both return their attention to the match. Masters charges at Idol, who deftly steps aside and drop toe holds Masters into the exposed turnbuckle. Cover gets a surprise 1-2-3 for the new Raw superstar

RATING: 57/55/60

Steven Idol gained overness from this match. Chris Masters lost overness from this match

-- Teddy F'N Hart! --

A promo video for Teddy Hart aired next, and garnered a pretty damn good reaction. Bret Hart's music hit to open it, and I think the fans went a little prematurely crazy. Still, seeing highlights of Teddy Hart's work was impressive (they showed the Hart Attack 2.0, Open Hart Surgery, and the Hart Rate). A voiceover (done by Hart) said he was a third generation superstar from a line of wrestlers that includes Jim Neidhart, Owen Hart, Davey Boy Smith, and Bret Hart. He says that there's unfinished business between his family and the WWE. He's coming soon and he's not coming alone. He's coming and he's going to settle some scores and raise some hell.

RATING: 68%

-- Melina's Out --

A short segment aired next, with Melina screaming and holding a presumably blood soaked tissue to her face as Nitro and Idol fawn at her side. A medic is with them, and he informs Melina that her nose has been broken and she won't be able to compete in tonight's title match. She does her high pitched scream and says she'll kill Candice Michelle.

-- Kelly Kelly vs. Candice Michelle vs. Mickie James © for the WWE Women's Title --

Mickie James and Candice both draw good reactions here, while Kelly Kelly's arrival is largely ignored despite her high degree of fineness. This is a straight three way dance now - meaning Mickie doesn't need to be pinned to lose her gold. With this in mind, Mickie comes out of the stalls with all guns blazing - laying out both Candice and Kelly with clotheslines. She immediately hits a tornado DDT on Kelly Kelly for a cover, but Candice smartly makes the break. She then shows the benefits of bunking with Burchill by locking Mickie in a passable Fujiwara Armbar, but Kelly has the presence of mind to break things up. This is a fairly terrible match, I need to highlight that. Mickie does her best, but in between a green Kelly and a largely unconvincing Candice, she's got her work cut out for her.

About six minutes in, Mickie is sent to the outside by a dropkick from Candice, leaving the pirate wench to fight things out with the former ECW exhibitionist. Candice has things in control and looks set for a win when she locks Kelly in Candylicious (her insanely appealing hanging figure four neck lock), but Melina's arrival with a chair turns things sour. An absolutely brutal chair shot to the face of Candice forces her to release the hold and fall unceremoniously to the ground (although Melina's presence means she doesn't hit the ground). Melina rolls her into the ring where Kelly Kelly gratefully covers. Mickie rushes to break things up, but she's a fraction late. Kelly Kelly gets the 1-2-3 and is the new WWE Women's Champion!

Kelly Kelly celebrates as a furious Mickie James watches on. Melina, for her part, looks over the moon at Candice's plight.

RATING: 59/66/43

The WWE Women's Title lost image

-- A Woman Scorned... --

After the commercial, another backstage segment aired. This time it's a still furious Mickie James storming through the halls backstage. She looks absolutely enraged at having lost her title. She shoves a smaller looking staff member out of the way and has just kicked a stack of cardboard boxes over when Kenny Dykstra comes into sight. He makes a smart ass remark about Mickie being on her period. She asks him to repeat that, getting right in his face. He tells her she's pretty when she's angry and she slaps him. Not a weak slap, either, a full blown 'fuck off' slap that sends him reeling. She says she wants a match with him next week!

RATING: 66%

-- We Cool? --

The door to Randy Orton's dressing room opens and it's Edge who enters. The two Rated RKO members look a little wary of one another as Edge approaches. He asks Randy if they're still cool after last week's match. Randy said he showed he was trustworthy when he didn't get involved in the finish. It's time that Edge showed him some loyalty. Edge asks what the hell that's supposed to mean and Orton says that tonight Edge is on his own.

RATING: 83%

-- Edge vs. Ric Flair --

The crowd are right into this, but despite the calibre of workers involved, this clash just doesn't reach any great heights from a workrate standpoint. Maybe Flair's just burned out on having to carry Umaga and The Great Khali in the past few weeks. Edge controls things early after catching the dirtiest player in the game in the eye with a blatant rake, but Flair gets back into it with his trademark low blow when the referee takes in 'inadvertant' bump when Edge is whipped. A scoop slam sees Flair go to the top rope, where he is predictably racked up by a desperation dive from Edge.

Edge goes back on the offensive with a suplex before coming off the ropes with a leg drop to Flair's head. He then takes advantage of the referee being down to blatantly choke Flair. The ref is to his feet in time to see Edge setting Flair up for the Edgecution, but Flair shoves Edge into the turnbuckles and rolls him up for two. Flair goes old school, chopping Edge into the corner before whipping him and crushing him in the other corner with a clothesline. He then throws Edge over the top rope and struts around the ring to the crowd's cheers. The referee is preoccupied counting the ten count though, and doesn't see Randy Orton hit the ring. RKO! Orton hits the RKO and makes a hasty retreat. Edge is back to his feet and enters the ring as Flair stumbles to his feet. SPEAR! 1-2-3! Edge picks up a win with a huge assist from Orton, and Orton stands on the ramp yelling that Edge 'owes him'.

RATING: 86/92/73

-- John Cena & Kevin Nash vs. Drew Damage, Ace Trump, and The Great Khali --

The less said about this 'main event', the better. When your match is being carried by John Cena, you know you're in a bit of trouble. Nash starts things off against Drew Damage, and mostly controls things. Damage's only real offence is a big body avalanche in the corner before tagging in Trump who, despite his pedigree, isn't able to lift anything brilliant out of Kevin Nash. Nash, for his part, seems exhausted after just three minutes and tags out to Cena - who gets a roar. He and Trump have the best chemistry of the clash, and a fairly enjoyable two or three minutes ensues before The Great Khali is tagged in. Cue overhand chops that floor Cena and Nash like they're rag dolls. Khali has Cena up for the choke bomb when Nash takes out a knee from behind. This allows Cena to knock the taste out of Khali's mouth with a slap. The two men are able to hook Khali up for a double inverted atomic drop before Cena covers. Drew Damage makes the save. Damage and Khali whip Cena to the ropes and a double clothesline puts him down.

The cover is broken up by Nash, who goes toe to toe with Khali, allowing Cena to knock Damage and Trump off the apron before hitting Khali with a flying shoulder block. Five knuckle shuffle follows, as Damage and Trump both hit the ring. Damage eats a big boot from Nash, while Trump is kicked in the gut and Nash signals for the jacknife powerbomb. Cena hefts Khali up onto his shoulders, screaming with exertion. F-U! Nash hits the powerbomb! Cover. 1-2-3! Cena pins Khali after a short, bland match!

RATING: 55/48/63

This match was seen as a let down after the last one. Drew Damage is losing overness because of his weak gimmick

OVERALL: 69%

BEST SEGMENT: Ric Flair Challenges Edge

WORST SEGMENT: John Cena & Kevin Nash vs. Drew Damage, Ace Trump, and The Great Khali

MOTN: Vladimir Kozlov vs. Eugene

BIGGEST POP: Ric Flair

MOST HEAT: Randy Orton

As I've said, I'll probably return to the other format now that I've got time spare again.

Edited February 26, 2007 by Misanthrope

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

The rules that Misanthrope followed were as follows:

1- Teddy Hart must be assigned to Raw...

2- Carlito must be traded to ECW for Kelly Kelly. Kelly Kelly MUST win the WWE Women's Championship within one month.

[MGW]

When i read that Kelly Kelly went over Mickie James, I died a little inside

I'm intregued by the Teddy Hart thing, do i sense Hart Foundation?