The "Complete" whacked Out wrestling Memorial...

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

After the show, it was basically hell weekend: I nearly forgot about the show Robbie booked in Detroit for that weekend. Luckily, it was close enough to AWAMLW's area so that I could get there, but then I heard the news:

"You mean...I drove all the way from Minneapolis to not get booked? No offense, Mr.Richter, but I could have stayed there for the next AWA show, and it wouldn't have been a problem..."

Robbie: "Well...yes..."

"So why did you ask those who aren't booked there to come?"

Robbie: "Um...shits and giggles..."

"I see..." Well, at least I'd get a chance to "network" with the necessary people. I quickly moved around looking for those who I intend to play a major part in this...

<<SUPER-DEFORMED TOM GODDARD: Sorry, kids, but this is top-secret: I'll put you in over at the AWAMLW show.>>

Samoa Joe v. Roadkill

I was not that surprised on this match getting a good ranking. Samoa Joe has quickly become one of the better brawlers in indy wrestling, and Roadkill's always good for a decent fat guy match. As a result, their match actually was decent, and the crowd recognized the two enough to get into this second-round matchup in the tournament. Samoa Joe got the big victory- not a real problem, as his ROH title makes him a good choice for a decent run (well, unless wOw decides to bury him to show their superiority...)

(54, 83, 68)

After that, Reno headed to the ring for his second-round matchup. Just then, "Whistle when you're Low" hit over the wOw speakers as Zach Gowen headed to the ring. Gowen took the mic...

"Hello...I am Cancer Boy... Now- I know all of you wOw fans probably don't think I will succeed- because I only have one leg- but I will destroy this guy- and his two legs- and win your World Title- despite only having one leg- and show people- that just because I have only one leg- does not mean- I am not a force to be reckoned with!"

(I'm going to Hell for this character, aren't I?

Satan: No prob, daddy- everyone knows we have the better musicians...

Oh, okay...)

"Cancer Boy" Zach Gowen v. Reno

Okay...we have a tornado match here...not in the wrestling sense, mind you, but in the sense that it managed to both suck and blow. Gowen proved he hasn't managed to shake the WWE style off yet, while Reno was not good at all. In addition, their mutual lameness was in different styles, adding a clash to the mix. Gowen hit his impressive Moonsault (I believe the announcers called it the Moon-Child Sault- apparently, they're building a new name for it in wOw), getting the win- a good thing, after all: At least fans still care about Gowen...

(46, 56, 51)

Teddy Hart v. Alex Wright

This was a match that I expected more from, honestly. Alex Wright is usually able to put on a decent enough show, and Teddy Hart's skill is well-known. However, the match was only a par-for-the-course match in itself. The two didn't mesh as well as I thought they would, with Hart having to slow down to match up with Wright's more methodical high-flying (both a bad thing match-wise, and a reason I'm surprised WWE hasn't given Wright a call yet.) Hart got the victory here in a surpriser- Alex Wright still has a bit more "name" recognition, even with Hart becoming the flavor of the month in the indy circuit.

(52, 75, 63)

Devon Storm v. Gillberg

I'm surprised that the WWE allowed Storm out after he signed for them, myself. I guess their new direction for lower-carders is allowing them to have any committments previously made by a wrestler to be honored. Anyway, this match was a fairly decent squash for Devon Storm, and for good reason: On the one hand, you have one of the WWE's young superstars in Crowbar/Storm, while on the other, you have: Gillberg. Yeah, THAT's not a mismatch... it was what it was, and it was fairly poor.

(54, 59, 56)

After the break, Barbara Vixen led the Anti-Life Corporation (Sugar Man and Danny Hillstead) out to the ring for a Tag Team Title matchup. Just then, the wOw speakers cut over... "...Like...like basketball players...and...and Greeks...You know, MEN FROM GREECE?" Just then, "Grease" hit as The Men From Greece headed to the ring with Nia Vardalos carrying their Tag Team Titles!

(TAG TEAM) The Men From Greece v. The Anti-Life Corporation

And the second-round tournament matches force two possible title matches to be squashed together, as Cruiserweight champ Sugar Man went up against the "Tag Team Champions From Greece". Naturally, this is not for the Cruiserweight title, as I sincerely doubt wOw's crazy enough to give the belt to a 350 pound guy. This match was pretty straightforward, as The Men From Greece put on another great match with another opponent despite styles clashes. Really, don't look now, but The Men From Greece may be the best tag team on the indy circuit today. Sugar Man and Hillstead made a run, as Hillstead nearly hit The Finishing Move (a nice Shooting Star Legdrop) on Nico...until Vardalos sprayed Windex into Hillstead's eyes, causing Nico to be able to roll him up for the win! Afterwards, the Men From Greece cheered, until Kelly Osbourne appeared at the top of the ramp with Kangor and Nate Webb flanking her...

"Yeah, yeah...you can beat those guys, but there's better teams out there. More skilled wrestlers...and talented specialists from around the world....and...and Samoans...you know, MEN FROM SAMOA?" Just then, "Jammin'" hit as Inita Ho and WWE superstar Rosey ran down into the ring to a MASSIVE chant of "RIP...OFF...RIP...OFF..." and attacked the Men From Greece! Yeah, this looks like it'll suck...

(34, 88, 61)

Magical Girl Essa Rios v. Frankie Kazarian

Okay then...they...they have Mr.Aguila...one of the world's best cruiserweights...as an anime magical girl? Memo to wOw writers: Stay off the pipe, okay? To add to the pain, when they put Frankie Kazarian, one of the best lightweights in the world today, the match should have been awesome..."should have" being the key words, as Rios's forced "magical girl" offense led to a styles clash that should not have existed. This is an example of the gimmick killing the wrestler, people. To add to the pain, Rios...went over. Yeah, cheer, wOw fans: YOU could have an anime magical girl as your World Champion very soon!

(47, 79, 63)

Danny Doring v. Mikey Henderson

Okay...why is Mikey Henderson employed? He's overrated, it must cost more money to fly him from the coast than he'll ever bring in, and he rarely puts on an amazing match to make it worth the while. Add that to Doring's boring in-ring ability, and you have a match that is one to miss. The match was fairly formulaic- Doring got the win fairly easily (as he should have.) After the match, however, Chris Hamrick came down the ramp...

"Yes, yes, Doring...you think you're the man, do you not? Well, just to show these people that you're not what these people should be cheering, I will give them the truth. You see, I have been doing some...detective work, if you will, and I have found millions of things that YOU probably don't want people to know! Stop going after MY International Title, and I may deign to keep it secret..."

(37, 74, 55)

However, "Detective Hamrick" (as the announcers called him) was attacked from behind by Steve Evans, putting him in the ring for a match!

Steve Evans v. Detective Chris Hamrick

This was a fairly downer matchup. Chris Hamrick's always been just on the cusp of being a cruiserweight/ "X-Division" wrestler: Able to keep up with them in the ring, but not able to put on an amazing match with them. In this case, Steve Evans managed to put on most of the nicer moves in the match. Let's see...nicer moves...looking like a million bucks...TNA X-Division star...AND he's homegrown? Three guesses who's winning this one, kids... The guess was right, as Danny Doring attacked Hamrick in the ring, allowing Evans to come off the top with a nice Shooting Star Press to get the victory. After the match, Doring took the mic...

"Well, Detective Hamrick, here's something I've deduced You'll be interested in: YOU no longer have a shot at the wOw World Title...and I DO!" Detective Hamrick fumed as Doring headed backstage.

(44, 82, 63)

Jeff Hardy d. The Run-In Man

Oh sweet Yevon, why is Ed Leslie in a main event? I don't care that it's for tournament reasons, I don't care that it's an indy fed, I don't care that he's facing Jeff Hardy...it's ED FUCKING LESLIE! The only thing he's ever done in wrestling was Hulk Hogan in a bathroom stall...but I digress... This time, Mr. Leslie comes to us in his old attire when he was the "Run-In Man"- so bad a character he didn't even get a real name! This time, we got a small favor, as Jeff Hardy absolutely squashed him, no matter how he was dressed. Thank L.Ron this occurred- at least Jeff Hardy's been putting on good matches in the last year or two (and to be fair, this was one of the better matches Leslie's been in in 15 years.) Sad- when you need Jeff Hardy to carry you, it's time to call it a day...

(46, 60, 53)

After the show, I was pumped. I had gotten all that I needed set up, and it was time for another big drive- this time, to get to the AWAMLW show tomorrow... eh, as long as I'm here...

<<SUPER-DEFORMED TOURNAMENT UPDATE!>>

Changed:

Region 3:

Devon Storm v. "Cancer Boy" Zach Gowen

Teddy Hart v. Samoa Joe

____________________________________________

Region 4:

Jeff Hardy v. Magical Girl Essa Rios

Steve Evans v. Danny Doring

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

Dead Reflecto Day

"Hi, kids! I'm a super-deformed version of everyone's favorite wOw superstar (or at least the 'top face' as Sophie claims, Tom Goddard! Today's the first episode of wOw Memorial 2's Dead Reflecto Days. Basically, these are excuses for our author to add additional little vignettes and other things in order to help increase the whole universe of whacked Out wrestling Memorial, to better help you understand where this place is coming from! Too much of these things can't be gtouched on as much in a linear storyline or in the story, helping everyone out. It works when he doesn't want to add more stuff, or just can't get to a computer with EWR for various reasons, say, going home for Spring Break. Here's our first one, so read it!"

____________________________________________________________________

After the show ended, me and my friends headed on our way from the wOw show in Detroit to Minneapolis for AWAMLW Underground Monday. I knew I needed some new refreshment, found at a 24-hour place we found on our way there...

Salesperson: "Welcome to Dunkin' Donuts, can I take your order?"

"Yes, me and my friends would like...what was it again? Oh yes...12 large coffees, 3 large mocha lattes, one caramel cappucino, refill this with a iced latte, both caramel and mocha swirl, preferably...4 dozen donuts...make them the Express, that'll work..."

Salesperson: "Okay..."

"And we don't need to pay..."

Salesperson: "Excuse me? What did you just say?" Crud...I forgot we weren't in New England...they don't know why...

"Oh...sorry...please take a look at my refill cup- that'll explain it..." I showed the cup to the salesperson, who saw:

copyright: 2004- whacked Out wrestling

DUNKIN' DONUTS PRESENTS THE STARS OF WHACKED OUT WRESTLING: Collectors Cup number 3 (collect all 5)

The Bishie Boys

Tom Goddard

Height: 6'2''

Weight: 175 lbs.

From: Providence, RI

Steve Evans

Height: 6'0''

Weight: 200 lbs.

From: Providence, RI

Titles held: wOw Tag Team Champions (1x), AWA Tag Team Champions (1x), AWAMLW Junior Heavyweight Champion (Evans)

In case that didn't go through, I passed the "Endorsement" card that granted free food for life- always a plus with Robbie's sponsorship deal for wOw with Dunkin' Donuts (plus, no Rhode Island cop is willing to pull over the guy on his souvenir cup!)

Salesperson: "Oh...let me get it then. My mistake..."

"Don't worry...I doubt this deal made it to the Midwest, anyways..." The salesperson started to get the stuff. I tried to call the others in to get their drinks, donuts, and the like. Eventually, it all went through, and we headed out for our stuff. Joey was pulling shotgun, and motioned for his wallet...or to take off his pants, I don't know- am I my AWAMLW tag team partner's keeper?

Joey: "Dude...how much do I owe you?"

"Dude- don't worry about it. Remember: Endorsement deal?"

Joey: "But I thought that only worked in New England...you know, where the commercials and cups are made for?"

"Nope- goes with any Dunkin' Donuts in the lower 48. Why do you think I always stop there?"

Joey: "Because you're too New England to see the joyous nature of Krispy Kremes?"

"Honestly, man...you've been up north since you started training, and you're STILL on that?"

Joey: "Just saying, is all..."

"Come on...no need to worry. Just change the CD..."

Joey: "Cool...what do you want?"

"Something I can drive to, you know..." Joey put a CD in, and the long-dormant sounds came into it... "Um...why'd you put this in? I need driving music..."

Joey: "Hey, the Wallflowers were a sweet band back in the day..."

"Yeah...okay..."

Joey: "Well, you're the one who owned the CD..."

"Touche..." I drifted into the stuff, just driving, drinking my iced latte, as the memories started overtaking me, sending me back to the days before I made it to high school...

Spring Break Side Story: High School Memories...

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

I could remember it like it was yesterday. Summer of 1997; when I had gotten the news...

"Tom, the letter came in!" My parents passed me the letter, which I proceeded to read...

Dear Thomas:

Congratulations on your new good fortune! After checking out your records from elementary and junior high, we have made the decision to allow you entrance in the CLAMP school starting in the 1997-98 school year. As you are no doubt aware, this school has an ungodly amount of skill in Rhode Island high schools, with the highest ratio of students who go on to college in New England. Your grades make you the ideal student to carry on our proud name. Welcome to the class of 2001, and we hope you'll enjoy your time here! (

Peanut Gallery: "REFLECTO READS SHOJO...REFLECTO READS SHOJO..."

"Shut up! A true artist must know of all skilled people so that they can merge styles and blaze their own trail, dammit!"

Peanut Gallery: "SURE...")

Somehow, I knew the letter would come any day now: My grades were awesome, my extracurriculars were talented, and my parents donated a lot of money last year to them. However, I was still a little nervous...

"But...but I thought that it was planned, I would go to the public school. You know, the one Sharon and Shane went to?"

Mr. Goddard: "Are you crazy? Public schools in Rhode Island are deathtraps for young minds like yours. (Re-Release Notes: Speaking from personal experience, I can safely say that this is much more true than claimed...) Do you want to end up like Sharon and Shane did- spending all your time in some second-rate high school gymnasium in front of about 50 people all your life? We want better things for you!"

"Um...didn't you and Mom MEET while working for wOw?" I knew those old photos of 'Airborne Ranger' Johnny Goddard and 'The Eastern Cowgirl' Annie Eckstein would serve me well in one of these arguments...

Mr.Goddard: "Well, that is true...however, you have to understand. We were smart enough to get out when we knew we had no choice. Shane...Sharon...they weren't. They believed all that Robbie told them, and think that just because they're the lords of Rhode Island wrestling, they're successes. What's it gotten them? Shane works in some cheesy bar, Sharon still working at Burger King, just because they don't want to give up that dream that Vince McMahon may think they're worthy of being 'Doink the Clown XXIX' one day. No offense to them, but we want better for you. You're going to be the one who makes something of themselves in this family..."

"But...but Mom..."

Mrs.Goddard: "Now, Tom...come on. We donated a lot of money to CLAMP School this year. Do you think we did it for those tax cuts?"

"Um...yeah..."

Mrs.Goddard: "Well, yes, but we also wanted to help make sure that you'll have the best possible education we can give you; one that you could only get here."

"I see..."

Mrs.Goddard: "Well, will you at least go to the open house? Humor us, Tommy..."

"All right...I had nothing planned that day; I guess I will..."

Mr.Goddard: "Okay, then. We trust you'll make the right decision..." Suddenly, the doorbell rang- two short, one long...I could recognize that melody anywhere. My mother went to get the door...

14-year-old Jocelyn: "Hi, Mrs. Goddard! Is Tommy home? We were going to go off to the beach today..." Oh...if only memories were real...and I was interested in playing Jerry Lawler...

Mrs. Goddard: "Sure...Tom..." Before she could finish, I blasted out the door...

Mr.Goddard: "We need to make sure he'll be gung-ho about going to CLAMP School..."

Mrs.Goddard: "And I think I might know one way..."

After a couple weeks that were pretty much a blur, it was time to head for the open house. At the very least, it'd provide me something to do that night...

Tour guide: "Welcome to the CLAMP school. I'll be your tour guide..." Dammit, I forgot my tour guide's name...FROM ALL THE POT I SMOKE...*waits for a pop from my readers* Dammit- why aren't there any readers yet to pop for that...?rassafrassinbakaswouldratherreadsomecrappyBattleRoyalewannabeorsome"well-known"writerturnWWEintoRingofHonorthansomethingtrulyoriginal...[ "Here, come and meet your fellow touring students." I headed over and met the others on this tour...

Younger guy 1: "Hey, what's going on? My name's Steve Evans...what's yours?"

"Tom Goddard- nice to meet you..."

Steve: "Wow...are you related to that dude Shane Goddard? I saw him at this wrestling show over in Cumberland- he was freaking AMAZING!"

"Yeah, he's my older brother..." Take THAT, mom and dad...he does have fans...

Steve: "Awesome! I'm a huge fan of wrestling...been trying to learn the craft in my backyard, but most of the people I know aren't willing to get beaten up with barbed-wire bats..."

"I see...so you're a yardtard, are you? No offense, but the backyard stuff is not the way I'd go about learning- who goes to an arena to see a bunch of idiots going through tables?"

Steve: "I see..." Suddenly, another person in our tour group came over to us...

Younger guy 2: "What did I hear? Were you two talking about *snicker* WRESTLING?"

Steve: "Yeah, so? It's on its way back up to greatness..."

Younger guy 2: "Oh, sure. Amateur's the only way to go- like did you see last year's Olympics? I bet Kurt Angle could wipe the floor with any of those 'fake' wrestlers any day of the week..."

Steve: "Yeah, but come on: Who'd want to see Kurt Angle in a WWF ring, anyway?"

Younger guy 2: "It doesn't matter. Like, this one show I saw in Seekonk last week...this butt-ugly bitch, Sharon...Goodhead or something, kicked the ass of some guy- like THAT is believable..."

"Um...the name's Goddard, and that's my sister you're talking about..."

Younger guy 2: "Oh, sorry..."

"No offense- I know she's a butt-ugly bitch, I don't care if others say she is..."

Younger guy 2: "Okay, then. Name's Jared...Jared Steele. Charmed..." The three of us all headed off on the tour. Damn...if these two are the students I'd have to deal with all day, I would DEFINITELY consider that a downer...luckily, I doubt I'll have anything to do with them after I graduate...

Edited July 29, 2004 by Reflecto

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

Meanwhile, at the Goddard Compound...

Mr. Goddard: "So, have you thought of this idea?"

Mrs. Goddard: "Of course...meet Sean Altman, one of the interns at my company. I've already promised him a glowing recommendation for college if he goes through with this..." (re-Release Notes: I did NOT get this name from X-Pac, I swear. I don't remember where I got the name from, but when the smoke cleared, I remember feeling like I ripped it off after realizing it's the same name as one of my close friends from college's favorite singer...)

Altman: "Nice to meet you..."

Mr.Goddard: "Are you sure? I mean, this isn't some random person who's being screwed here, its our son, possibly the daughter of one of our close friends..."

Mrs.Goddard: "I know, but still..." Suddenly and without reason, everyone broke into song... (You don't see those OTHER "original" series doing stuff like this, do ya?)

Mrs. Goddard: School is coming, need Tom to succeed...

Mr.Goddard: Don't want him to be one of those idiot Thayer Street kids, spending all their dough on weed...

Mrs. Goddard: But now this girl's, leading him astray...

Mr. Goddard: If it means he'd succeed, I'd rather he be gay...

Both: Gotta get the fool, into CLAMP school, so we need to take his will to fight...

Altman: Tell me more, tell me more

Is money in it for me?

Tell me more, tell me more

I won't do this for free

No way, no how, no way, no how……

Mrs. Goddard: She'll make him wrestle, be like his sibs

Mr.Goddard: He's way too smart, that's not how he should have to live

Mrs.Goddard: Puppy love's not as important as his smarts...

Mr.Goddard: So we need to screw him like he was Bret Hart...

Altman: That never happened yet- that's not until November.

Mr.Goddard: Oh, sorry...

Both: This school is his chance at true happiness, so take out his will to fight

Altman: Tell me more, tell me more

This girl that I'll have to see

Tell me more, tell me more

Will I get to touch her boobies? [Hyuk, hyuk]

Mrs. Goddard: We don't care, as long as he gets in this school

Mr.Goddard: He needs to be somebody, not be somebody's fool

Mrs. Goddard: Do whatever, you think needs to pass

Mr.Goddard: Not too much, though, lest Robbie kick your ass...

Both: Do what it takes, lead those two to a break, and take out his will to fight

Altman: Tell me more, tell me more

This plan sounds like it shouldn't be

But I'll do it anyway

If it'll get me into an Ivy...

Mrs. Goddard Don't worry now, I'll write up the letter

Mr.Goddard: Just as long as this works... Mrs.Goddard: IT BETTER...

Altman: This internship sure beats being your gofer...

Mrs. Goddard: Well, get to work then- I don't recommend loafers...

Both: Get out there, don't wait to stare, and take out his will to fight...

Altman: Tell me more, tell me more

I doubt this'll take long...

Tell me more, tell me more

(on the school tour) Tom Goddard, Steve Evans, Jared Steele: HEY, REFLECTO, WHY DON'T WE EVER GET TO SPONTANEOUSLY BREAK OUT INTO SONG? Hello...major characters here...

Mrs. Goddard: The plan's out there...I hope this will work

Mr.Goddard: You know if he finds out about this, we'll look like total jerks...

Mrs. Goddard: We'd better make a secrecy vow...

(out of memory) Tom Goddard: You two realize I'm reading this now..right?

Both: Wasn't us- don't spit, don't cuss, now go lose your will to fight!

TO BE CONTINUED... (Re-Release Notes: I really dislike this bad habit that my local mall's computer has- namely, the habit that when I put in a post, it doesn't all go through. The library's computer doesn't have that, but in exchange, I can't use AIM on that one [which is the only way I can talk with my assistants...] *sniffle* I wanna go back to school and have a computer that works...)

Edited July 29, 2004 by Reflecto

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

After the open house ended, Jared and Steve kept hanging around me...

Steve: "Let's go get something to eat..."

Jared: "Yeah- it'll give us a chance to sample what we'd be eating here." I knew about how the tour guide told us about where the kids at CLAMP ate around here, so I headed to the finest place will go through...

"Welcome to Subway, can I take your order?"

"3 subs, please one steak and cheese, one meatball, and one Veggie Delight..." We got our subs and headed over to a booth.

Steve: "So, what else is around here?"

Jared: "Well, 91.1's holding a free concert just down the road..."

"Cool- I never got to go to many of those." After we finished eating, we headed off to the park down the road. Suddenly, a car pulled over to the side of the road...

Jocelyn: "Hey, give these guys a ride, Sean...Tom! What's going on?"

Steve: "And who is this lovely lady, Tom? Are you hiding stuff from us?"

Jared: "Yeah, just because we just met a few hours ago doesn't mean you should keep this from us, man!"

"Oh, sorry...this is one of my old friends, Jocelyn..."

Jocelyn: "Are you guys heading for the show, too? I wasn't going to go, but this guy asked if I needed a ride, and I was like...sure..."

Sean: "Hi...Sean Altman...I'm 17, have my own car, have a regular job, and you probably think I have a larger penis than you..."

Jocelyn: "Isn't he cool?" It begins... "I really wanted to see this band, and it's cooler if you come with..." Now we'll have to go our separate ways... "I really want to talk to you...I...I think that I'm..." We're doomed to drift apart now...I can see us grow further, even as she is here...

Jocelyn (yelling): "HEY! WHY DIDN'T YOU GET IN THE CAR?" I ran over to get through to her, seeing my new 'friends' and oldest, dearest one carrying on all the way...

(in the car):

Steve: "Is Tom always like this?"

Jocelyn: "Yeah- he's been going off into space like that for as far back as I can remember."

Jared: "I see..."

I finally managed to catch up with them, if by "catch up with" you mean "find the car parked near the park that the show was taking place at." By the time I got there, I managed to find them, looking as Sean tried to do stuff with Jocelyn...

Steve: "You might not want to do that...give them 'alone time', man..." Crud...I'm who she's supposed to want 'alone time' with...Luckily, the band came on, and I was ready to forget...

Jason Knight: "Hello, Providence! I am Jason Knight, and with me is Joey Styles, and we're proud to present AWA action for you!" Hey, AWA wasn't around in 1997... "Tonight, we've got a great match: Tom Goddard v. Christopher Daniels in the finals of the 2004 Super-8 Tournament!"

"Wait...I don't wrestle..."

Steve: "Sure you do...don't you see up there?" I looked at myself on stage, crawling until I was beaten...Daniels was almost there...I could see him grasp the title...

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGH...wait, what am I doing in the passenger seat?" I saw Joey next to me...

Joey: "Oh, sorry- at the end of the driveway at Dunkin' Donuts, you went into your own little world for a bit. I had to dead-lift you into the passenger seat and take the wheel...after a bit, you fell asleep." Yikes...just a dream...feeling slightly more refreshed, I kept watching as we headed to the AWAMLW show.

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

When we finally touched down at the arena, I was somewhat refreshed, if slightly worried...why did that memory come back into play? Was it the music choice? A random thing? The author trying to keep his momentum going despite leaving for spring break and having no EWR to make more shows? (Personally, I would bet it's that reason...) I tried to get it out of my head, tonight was a big night. We needed nothing to work to take me out of my zone...

Kari-chan: "TOMMY-KUN! You've come back to be wif me foreverandeverandever..." Need to stay in the zone...

Jared: "Hey, Tom...I've got a copy of tonight's Sin on tape...you want to watch?" ...Well, maybe I can do something while getting in the zone...

wOw Sin

Your hosts are RD Reynolds and Tony Schiavone.

Vic Grimes v. Finale

This is a surprising match, at least to me. On the one hand, you've got Finale, arguably the best brawler outside the bigs today. On the other, you've got Vic Grimes, arguably the most overrated and undertalented sack of shit outside the bigs today. Put them together...and you get a match just good enough to entertain me. The crowd was just barely into it, as the two did what makes their names: Finale by putting on a nice hardcore matchup, Grimes by...taking shots with barbed-wire lighttubes and falling off balconies. Thankfully, Finale won this one. I can say it a million times: VIC GRIMES DOES NOT DESERVE TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR A WORLD TITLE. Shot, yes, tortured, probably- World Title? Definitely not...

(52, 76, 57)

After the match, Finale took the mic...

Finale: "Next Monday...live at the Ryan Center...the end will occur. No longer will I be forced to prostitute the great joys of causing pain, searching desperately for new victims around the globe. I will take the whacked Out wrestling World Heavyweight Title, and then my endless quest will go unneeded: Instead of me going out for the next victim, my victims will at long last come to me, like young children enraptured by the gingerbread house, not knowing of the witch that lies in wait! Next week, wOw fans...prepare to meet your title's Finale!"

Scoot Andrews v. Jared Steele

This is a matchup I had really high hopes for, only to be derailed. Scoot Andrews is arguably the best wrestler to not get a major run with any of the "Big 3" yet, while Jared Steele can put on a *.5 match with a broomstick (and is young enough to get to the *** star quality eventually...) Hence, this match should be awesome, right? Think again. The match was fairly good, to be sure, but it showed each of the two's failings: For how good Andrews is, he wasn't able to make Steele look up to par, and the fact that Jared Steele is still a relatively green wrestler showed in spades against the more experienced Andrews. Jared Steele got the win following a Done Deal. Yeah, booking a relatively obscure wrestler over someone who's a top indy/valued star for it: No, wOw doesn't give preference to homegrown wrestlers, HONEST...

(52, 79, 58)

After the match, Steele took the mic...

Steele: "You know, for too long, I've been overlooked in whacked Out wrestling. I see all the other wOw guys get the major props on a national level, while I just sit back and put on good shows for the fans. To be honest, though: I'm tired of just sitting back and remaining just another hand. I'm going into the Ryan Center next Monday, and I am taking that wOw World Heavyweight Title! If no one's going to give me the credit I deserve, I'll just have to take it!"

After I saw that match, I knew I had to do some ragging...

"Oh, sure- lame matchup there, man...you claim to have skill, but couldn't have an awesome match with Scoot Andrews?"

Jared: "Come on- Scoot's style was way too different from mine. Actually, from what I saw of him, I think you could probably put on an awesome matchup with him- your styles are very similar."

"Thanks for the tip- I'll keep it in mind." With this in hand, I continued to watch the show.

Tito Ortiz v. Akio

And we get a "WWE" matchup, as Tito Ortiz fulfills some committments against rented "superstar" Akio. It's a perfect matchup! Raw v. Smackdown! WWE v. WWE in wOw! MMA star v. high flyer! Wait...that's not good, that means we're in for a styles clash...which we were. Granted, it was a good styles clash: At least the two are standouts in their style. However, I get the feeling it would have been better if they matched up a bit more. To add to the pain, the fans weren't even into the Raw/Smackdown on an indy show factor, as it didn't get much more of a reaction than the previous two matches. Tito Ortiz got the victory, going on to the final 16. Not...horrible, but it could definitely stand to be better.

(57, 76, 59)

After the match, Tito Ortiz took a mic...

Ortiz: "Finally, I'm getting in position to do it. whacked Out wrestling has had some of the best MMA competitors hold the World Title here, and next Monday, I am going to be in line to do the same...it's the order I was given..."

RD: "What could he mean by that?"

Schiavone: "Who cares? This is the GREATEST foreshadowing claim in the history of sports!"

After that break, Duke Droese headed to the ring trying to find his opponent. Suddenly, a WWE logo showed up on screen and "This is NOT 'No Sleep Till Brooklyn', Please Don't Sue" hit as Chuck Palumbo came out to the ring as the mystery opponent!

Chuck Palumbo v. Duke Droese

I almost expected Palumbo to show up as one of these mystery guys from WWE; I've heard that Palumbo's been a long-standing friend of whacked Out wrestling, and according to reports got former wOw stars Brad Richter and Shane Goddard the dark match that became their tryout for the WWE. It seems like wOw is paying him back by treating him well; he and Droese's styles meshed about as well as you could expect for the two. Of course, that's nothing big between the two of them, but it made it a "nice" poor brawl instead of a crap poor brawl. Pretty WWE-style matchup, a poor thing on an indy card. Palumbo got the win with a quick Superkick- expectable, plus it means that the wrestling garbageman won't be a wOw Champion.

(51, 66, 52)

After the match, Chuck Palumbo took a mic:

"Hey, yo- this place's been going on too long without the right connections, ya see? These whacked Out wrestling chumps've been going about their business, not giving the proper tribute to me and my boys. Next Monday, all that's gonna change, BAM! ya know, when I'ma take the wOw World Heavyweight Title and use that as our tributes, capiche?"

After that, Paul London headed to the ring, and introduced to the fans his own mystery opponent (at least, a nice way to sell the WWE honor among thieves thing...) Just then, the WWE logo showed up as Al Snow headed into the ring for the matchup!

Al Snow v. Paul London

And we get another Raw v. Smackdown matchup here, only this time- the crowd was somewhat into it. Granted, Al Snow's a much more established player than Tito Ortiz and indy fans care more about Paul London than Akio, but still, there is hope. In addition, despite this match also having a bit of a style clash to it, it was really good despite that. The crowd got into the match, helping turn this into the likely match of the night of all of them. Paul London got the victory here, which puzzled me: Al Snow's the more over wrestler- why wouldn't he get the nod in the two? Either way, the fans were happy with this, so who knows?

(60, 79, 62)

After the match, Paul London took the mic...

"Um...uh...next week, I'm going to...um...take the wOw World Title, and use it to finally get a bit more respect in WWE! No one's going to put a World Champion on Velocity to job, will they? Huh? Um...YEAH!"

Tom Goddard v. TJ Wilson

Okay...this match is a disappointment on all levels. TJ Wilson's usually a good wrestler, Tom Goddard's usually a good wrestler- this should be naturally golden, right? WRONG: The two didn't manage to mesh at all in the match, leaving a completely mediocre matchup for it. The fans weren't into it (a shock; Goddard's one of the most over faces in wOw), the match was extremely poor (a shock- as I said, the two are usually awesome in the ring), and it was basically a wreck. The ending needed help too, as Jocelyn Richter headed up to the ropes and distracted TJ Wilson, allowing Goddard a chance to come off the top with a nice Dragonrana on Wilson for the victory!

(48, 68, 52)

After the match, Tom Goddard and Jocelyn Richter took the mic...

Richter: "Yes! We did it- We've made it to the Ryan Center! Finally, things have fallen into place, Tom..."

Goddard: "Seven days...just seven days until I have the chance I've been waiting for since the moment I signed with whacked Out wrestling. I've been put in tag team matches, I've gotten some spot singles matches, but in the year since I signed with wOw, I've never gotten one chance for this....no chances to get the whacked Out wrestling World Championship. It's taken me one year right now of fighting, trying everything possible, and now, now I finally get a shot...a shot to seize that belt! You see, the other people in this tournament may WANT the belt...but how many of these people HAVE TO HAVE it?"

Richter: "Not one of these people eats, sleeps, and breathes whacked Out wrestling like we do, and always have!"

"I've seen these WWE guys come into whacked Out wrestling- into this tournament to get a shot at the World Title...but any time they say they want the wOw title, it's just lip service: They want the WWE championship, the World Championship- Any championship but this one! But with me...every wOw fan out there knows that ever since I was 4 years old and my parents finally allowed me to come to whacked Out wrestling shows, I always had one goal in mind. I never asked to be a rising star, I never wanted to be considered the 'Next Big Thing' in wrestling, I never wanted to be named 2003 Rookie of the Year, I never wanted to be considered the 'King of the Indies', I never wanted to be the first wOw guy to qualify for the Super-8- hell, I never even grew up hoping to hold the WWF Title. To me, all I've ever truly wanted in professional wrestling was to be able to hold up the whacked Out wrestling World Heavyweight Title- to know that, even if it's just for one day, I had made it to the top of the mountain in wOw! To know that my name could be put on the same list of all the great wOw champions who I watched since I was a child...just to be the wOw World Heavyweight Champion!" Tom Goddard was fighting back tears as he continued.

Even with the wOw guys in this tournament: You may want that wOw World Title...but this isn't what you need. You need the recognition that you've gotten...you need to make a claim that you're the crown jewel of wOw to get superstardom. You don't have one-half of the want we have: The endless times me and Jocelyn borrowed the belt from Brad, Geoffrey, or Shane, practicing throwing clotheslines and dropping elbows on each other, then holding up that belt as if we actually were the wOw World Champion and just hoping that one day, it could actually occur that we would be able to stand in a wOw ring and hold it up for real! That willingness to sacrifice 5 months of your own career just as it's beginning to truly take off just in the hope that wOw would be able to have weekly Pay-Per-Views! To you, that title's just a prop. To ME, THAT TITLE IS THE ONLY THING I'VE EVER REALLY WANTED IN LIFE! I AM NOT GOING TO LET ANY ONE OF YOU TAKE IT- NOT WHEN I'M SO CLOSE THAT I CAN ALMOST FEEL THE WEIGHT OF THAT TEN POUNDS OF GOLD AROUND MY WAIST!"

Richter: "I guess what it comes down to is...these others...they WANT the title. But we...we NEED that belt more than anything else in the world...we HAVE TO HAVE that belt more than anything else in the world...and if anyone else thinks they want it more than us...they'll have to go through Tom next week..."

Goddard: "And no matter what it takes, that belt is leaving the Ryan Center with me!"

After the break, Brandon Downard was in the ring as he waited for his mystery opponent. Just then, a wOw logo appeared as Spike Dudley came down to the ring for the matchup!

Spike Dudley v. Brandon Downard

This at least was a pretty normal matchup. It showcased each wrestlers' skills: Downard in dishing it out, Spike in taking it. This led to a fairly decent match, but also made it more of a WWE-style matchup: Downard could have been replaced by any wrestler in the world and it would have been basically the same matchup. Other than that, it was fairly straightforward: Dudley takes punishment, Brandon Downard hits the Downfall (a nice top-rope Ace Crusher) through a table, Downard gets the win. Pretty subpar, if you ask me...

(51, 69, 54)

After that, Downard took the mic...

"Oh, boo-hoo...Little Lord and Lady Fauntleroy claim that they deserve the title? My question is: What for, exactly? Being born to the right wrestling families? You two have never truly fought a day in your life! Your mask is in the guise of being the top stars in whacked Out wrestling...a federation owned by one of the two's father? Gee...what a coincidence...you haven't fought through the toughest fight clubs in Pittsburgh just to get noticed by wrestling promotions, then went through the East Coast looking for it. If you two want it more than any of us 'little people' here in wOw...good news: Next Monday, you're going to see me fight my way through everyone in wOw and realize just what it feels like to want!"

(Meanwhile, I remembered catching up with Spike Dudley after the match...)

"Hey, I thought you guys weren't supposed to job to wOw guys..."

Spike: "Oh, yeah- like I could really do that to Robbie: He's been a friend of mine for years. Good luck- hopefully you won't have anything happen to you on the way through this tournament..."

"Thanks, Mr....Dudley..."

Spike: "Please...call me Spike..."

Masato Tanaka v. Shannon Moore

Sometimes in wrestling, something occurs to give you the hint that maybe something's not on the up-and-up backstage: Hulk Hogan winning the World title at Wrestlemania IX, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley choosing Triple H instead of Kurt Angle...and now this. When Masato Tanaka, one of the most well-respected ECW wrestlers loses to Shannon Moore, a fairly unknown WWE wrestler, that's a sign that there might be something wrong with all these WWE guys coming to wOw. I sincerely hope the brass at wOw can manage to nip this in the bud; I don't get a good feeling from this...

(61, 78, 62)

After the match, Shannon Moore took a mic:

"Next week, ah'm gonna prove I deserve a title...um...by winning the title! Yeah!"

Over: 57

After the match, Joey tapped me on the shoulder...

Joey: "Um...dude...we're up."

"Let's do this..." We left to get into position for our match on the AWA card...

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

(Meanwhile, while the people in wOw were watching Sin...)

WWE RAW

Shannon Moore v. The King of Pop

Okay, I am still in awe of why the WWE, one of the biggest shows in the world, thinks that Hy-Zaya is worthy of a spot on their flagship show. Sure, he's able to do a Michael Jackson impersonation, but there's plenty of actual decent workers who could probably do the same.This match was fairly blah: The two weren't good enough to make it a good enough spotfest (which I fault entirely to The King of Pop), and this was thankfully a huge Shannon Moore squash. That's good: Moore can at least contribute something, whereas The King of Pop's lifespan will basically be eliminated as soon as this feud is over...

(41, 72, 56)

After that match, Rico and Nicholas Dinsmore were in back...

Dinsmore: "NOOOO! Cancel my match...cancel my match, Rico, please!"

Rico: "Don't worry, my protege- you're easily able to get that...ghetto fabulous wannabe Orlando Jordan...you have so much more STYLE than he does!"

Dinsmore: "That's...that's the problem...I'm out of Axe...how am I supposed to smell well enough to defeat that...baser person? I can't risk going out there, working, and smelling like I just worked a match, can I?"

Rico: "This is a problem...here, borrow mine, then go out there and kick his ass!" Rico passed Dinsmore a bottle of Axe, and their match is NEXT~!

Nicholas Dinsmore v. Orlando Jordan

Oh, great: We get some form of buildup for a Nicholas Dinsmore/Orlando Jordan match. Really nice move,WWE: it REALLY made me care about these two second-raters... To add to the fun, it was a total styles clash. It's easy to make fun of Dinsmore, but I can say this: The guy's got the skills to go far in the WWE. Not so with Jordan, as he made the match more of a problem, trying to keep up with Dinsmore and almost-but-not-quite making it. Orlando Jordan got Dinsmore reeling, then shouted "KOBE!" before going for the Slam Dunk...only for Dinsmore to reverse out of it and lock a Crossface in on Jordan for the victory! Unfortunately, during the match, I was busy talking...to my girlfriend...WHO I'VE HAD SEX WITH...so I couldn't really tell how good the match was or was not (I'm betting on "not...")

[We now return you to your regularly scheduled AWAMLW show.]

AWAMLW Underground

We headed out to the ring in order to do this. Jared and John were already in there to make it work. I whispered to them...

"Let's roll..."

EMOtion v. The Cannonball Commission

I'm honestly surprised that this match wasn't awesome. The Cannonball Commission always put on good wOw matches with both the Nobodies and the Bishie Boys, so a team of one Nobody and one Bishie Boy should manage the same, right...? Wrong...The match was pretty normal for what I've seen: Not a bad match, to be sure, but nowhere near what I had expected from these two together. The two put on a nice amount of moves, with EMOtion making the Cannonballs look like something special. Eventually, after a number of good chains of wrestling (and natural INDY APPLAUSE STANCES~! galore), Tom Goddard and Jared Steele locked up in the middle of the ring...

"You ready, Jared?"

Jared: "Let's do this, bro..." Suddenly, the two paced around the ring before heading into the middle...where the two teams broke the tieup off, and Tom Goddard reeled back and hit a FINGER POKE OF DOOM~! on Steele! An audible "COUNT IT, YOU MLW PIECE OF SHIT!" was yelled by Roche and Hamm at the referee as he went down for the three. After the match, the four wrestlers shook hands- after which the locker room emptied of virtually every AWAMLW worker who counts whacked Out wrestling as their home base!

Not a great match, but I want to see what's happening...

(53, 78, 58)

After the match, Goddard took the mic...

"Okay, guys: LOCK THEM OUT!" Finale proceeded to grab a steel chair and weave it through the doors that served as the Gorilla position for the show...

Knight: "What the hell is going on here? This isn't in the script! We're sorry folks, but this is beyond even us...

Goddard: "Now, AWAMLW fans...we doubt you idiotic Minnesota hicks DESERVE an explanation for what we're doing out here, but we'll give one to you anyway..."

Styles: "They'd better..."

Goddard: "Now, all of you fans may notice that there's been a problem in the last few weeks. wOw guys have been treated as jobber fodder for AWAMLW guys, and basically made to look like jokes. We're okay with that, it's all part of the show, right? WRONG. Last Saturday night, the mood changed completely. As you all saw, me and Joey lost to the Extreme Horsemen. Nothing wrong with that...losing's a part of wrestling. Only problem with this is...Kari-chan, will you do the honors on that AWATron?" Kari-chan proceeded to try to change the channel given to it, finally getting to Spike TV... "Watch and see..."

Two Bad MF'ers v. The Dudley Boyz (for the WWE World Tag Team Championship)

And we have York and Matthews, er, the Two Bad MF'ers versus the Dudley Boyz, because everyone knows no one else is a team on Raw...To be fair, I can't complain much about the match quality. Maybe it's because all the matches these two have together is bound to make teams work well, but this was an awesome matchup. The two teams were working on all 8 cylinders for it. Suddenly, Dawn Marie showed up at the top of the ramp, and slowly walked down to the ramp. Alexis Laree tried to keep her away from the action, as the Dudleyz and Bad MF'ers kept working their magic. Suddenly, an opening occurred for the champions. York managed to get the Onion Buster on D-Von Dudley, giving the two the win. After the match, the Two Bad MF'ers celebrated in the ring. Alexis Laree went in to celebrate with her team...allowing Dawn Marie to make a signal out to the fans! Instantly, Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger rushed the ring and laid waste to both teams! Simon and Swinger left with Dawn Marie as they went to break...

(74, 94, 84)

(Commercials...)

After the break, Terri was in back with the two...

Terri: "Dawn Marie...just moments ago, you sent those two wrestlers in to attack two of the top tag teams in the business. Can you tell us why?"

Dawn Marie: "I think it would be better to let them explain..." Simon Diamond took the mic...

Diamond: "Hey, WWE fans: SIMON'S GOT A PROBLEM! For the last few years now, me and my associate Johnny Swinger have been going around the world looking for the best teams to fight, both together and separate. Name the major belt, and one of us has probably held it! Go anywhere where wrestling's big: Philadelphia, Nashville, Atlanta, and one of us has probably had a match there with title implications! Hell, as of right now, I myself am one half of the tag champions over in Minneapolis!" The camera zoomed out to a slightly blurry picture of what could be seen as an AWAMLW Global Tag Team Championship title belt. "Now, the only problem I have with this is simple: After all of this time, I've realized, and Johnny here concurred..." Simon Diamond then grabbed that belt, spit on it, then threw it in a trash can! "...these other places' titles are nothing, and the only belts that mean anything are the WWE World Tag Team Championships!"

Swinger: "And because of that...shine those belts up nice, MF'ers- we're taking them!"

(75)

The crowd was in shock from seeing those...

Knight: "I...I cannot believe what I just saw! Simon Diamond just showed up on WWE Raw and trashed one of the Global Tag Team Titles!"

Styles: "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? HOONANCONRANA!"

Goddard: "As you can see, Simon Diamond just broke a cardinal rule of wrestling: If you know you're going to leave the company, you do the job on your way out, no matter what! But it gets worse: After the show Saturday, Court H. Bauer said flat-out that me and my friends weren't good enough for AWAMLW; that we were too freaky and too loyal to wOw to deserve any semblance of respect here! That is why, since we obviously don't have any hope of getting a chance here, me and my comrades from wOw are hereby declaring ourselves FREE AGENTS, and tonight is our try-out for ANY federation that feels we have the skill to make it there!"

Knight: "He's taking control of AWAMLW Underground? I don't believe this! This is insubordination!"

(82)

After the break, Geoffrey Richter headed to the ringside area to join Jason Knight and Joey Styles on commentary...

Richter: "Hello, sirs- since you guys are still working for the enemy, I was asked to come down here and keep an eye on you during these matches..."

Knight: "Oh, great: Just what we needed..." Just then, The Men From Greece and The Downard Brothers jumped into the ring to put on a match as Geoffrey Richter hyped the two up...

Richter: "Hello, all you heads of wrestling federations reading this! I am of course, Jeff Richter: Former wOw superstar in the ring turned up-and-coming color man. I am available for any federation on the rise looking for someone who can make their second-raters look like superstars...As for the wrestlers in the ring, you're currently looking at a pair of decent buys for anyone. On one side is The Men From Greece, the reigning whacked Out wrestling Tag Team Champions. This set of 350 pound Greek twins are each deceptively agile big men, and would make a great addition to any tag team division! Their opponents, the Downard Brothers, don't have as much credibility as a tag team, but they are worth attention: Brandon Downard may be one of the best brawlers in North America today, and is a definite blue-chip prospect for any up-and-coming federation looking for someone they can build around, both in a hardcore division or in the heavyweight division! Order now, and we'll throw in Brett Downard at development cost: Get a potential superstar and a good potential jobber to the stars! Call 1-800- WOW-STAR and get your hands on a wOw Superstar now!"

The Downard Brothers v. The Men From Greece

This match was actually better than I thought it would be: The Men From Greece are just awesome together, and they meshed well with Brandon Downard. Brett Downard proved he doesn't have what it takes here: A bad thing, considering that they're "trying to get deals with other feds". This led Brandon Downard to take the forefront, as he and the Men From Greece had an awesome matchup together. The Men From Greece wore him down, however, and got an easy Big Fat Greek Suplex to get the victory. Fairly poor crowd reaction, which was probably the result of the total problem of that.

Richter: "An amazing win for the Men From Greece! Remember, they ARE up for the right price to any of you budding promoters out there! 1-800- WOW-STAR!" The Men From Greece then celebrated with the Downard Brothers...until Ken and Frank Shamrock headed out to the ring and attacked the teams as the show went to break!

(38, 82, 54)

After the break, Halo and Prodigy headed into the ring and observed Code of Honor rules as Jeff Richter continued his play-by-play...

Richter: "This is going to be awesome, folks! On one hand, you've got Halo, one of the most complete wrestlers in whacked Out wrestling today, and the perfect addition to any roster! In my opinion, this guy's the next Christopher Daniels, only one who doesn't hide behind Court H. Bauer to keep his spot when wOw guys deserve it more! And his opponent, Prodigy, is just as great: Look at the physical specimen that this guy is, only he can wrestle as good as he looks! Both are available to good homes, just call 1-800-WOW-STAR!"

Halo wOw v. Prodigy wOw

This was actually an awesome matchup. The two meshed together really well, as Halo's all-round style worked to make Prodigy's brawling and submission look amazing. It was a pretty decent showing of the two's strengths, as they managed to make each other look really good. I'd like to see another match or two between them to see if they could do better. Halo got the win here, but really everyone was the victor here. After the match, the two followed the Code of Honor...until Homicide came in and beat the crap out of the two of them!

Knight: "Yes! You cannot stop the power of the AWAMLW, no matter how hard you try!"

(41, 90, 58)

After the break, the entirety of the wOw contingent that took over was in the ring. Goddard took the mic...

"Okay, who the hell is responsible for this? This is our night, not you MLW punks! Show yourselves..." Just then, Court H. Bauer came out to the ring and grabbed a mic...

Court H. Bauer: "Oh, so this is YOUR night? Congratulations, wOw punks! You just took over our show, put on acts of blatant insubordination, and broke FCC code by simulcasting Raw over our airwaves! I should have you all arrested right now, but I'll settle for firing you all right here on Underground!" The group looked somber for a moment...

Goddard: "Okay, Mr. Bauer. I know that what we did was wrong. Go ahead and fire us..." The group started to look sadder... "After all, my close personal friends STEVE EVANS, JOCELYN RICHTER, and GREG BURCH told me that there's plenty of room in their sandbox for all of us to come play!" The group looked happier as they started a "T-N-A!" chant up as Bauer looked livid.

Bauer: "Okay, okay...bad idea. But I CAN make your lives a living hell. I mean, come on, Goddard...you think you had problems just being a tag team guy after making the finals of the Super 8? Just for this, I'm making a call to them: No AWAMLW wrestler can use your name. If they want to refer to you, they'll call you like you were in Philly- we'll make you Harry Potsmoker again! You like that, don't you? If you're going to take MY show over...then I'll just have to ruin all the credibility you have on the indies! By the time I get through with you, even that shithole in Providence you people are so proud of won't touch you with a 50-foot-pole!"

Goddard looked somber again as Chris Dobbs and Jared Steele headed out of the ring ...

"You know what, Court...you can threaten to fire me; I'll just get more bookings elsewhere. You can threaten to give us all bad gimmicks- we're all talented enough to make them work." Goddard headed out of the ring. "But never, and I mean EVER, BADMOUTH WHACKED OUT WRESTLING!" Just then, Dobbs and Steele struck, with Dobbs hitting a Pepto Plunge on the steel ramp on Bauer! Steele followed with the Done Deal, before they loaded Goddard up as he hit a My Final Heaven off the top rope and through the announcer's table! As the show ended, the crowd of wOw wrestlers looked over Bauer...

Styles: "It's official...a mutiny has begun in AWAMLW!"

Knight: "Heaven help these wOw wrestlers after this occurs, because no one in the American Wrestling Association will!"

(73)

66

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

After the match, the wOw guys were electric. My plan had worked perfectly, and we were excited about the next plan.We couldn't see much of Raw (well, after the big tag title match), so I headed off to the nearest website for what occurred...

Evolution put on one of their patented 20 MINUTE PROMOS OF DOOM~!, this time hyping the new members, AJ Styles and Maven...oh, ho ho, you thought that was true? 20 more minutes of Triple H talking about how...well...he's Triple H...(87)

Shane Goddard d. Val Venis following a nice display of cheating... (70, 85, 77) (DAMMIT! The one time I miss one of my brother's matches, and he pulls off something like that? Rassafrassin...)

Molly Holly d. Alexis Laree (42, 59, 50)

Maven d. The Hurricane to retain the Intercontinental Title. After the match, Lance Storm ran in and attacked Maven. (80, 73, 77)

An episode of the Highlight Reel occurred, with an interview that led immediately to...

(88)

Chris Jericho d. Scott Steiner (89, 78, 85)

Shawn Michaels, Chris Benoit, and John Cena d. Evolution (Triple H, Ric Flair, AJ Styles)- Cena pins Flair (88, 78, 84)

Over: 76

After the tape finished up, I happened to get a phone call...

"Hello...Tom Goddard speaking, who is it?"

Voice: "Hello, Tom...just who I've wanted to speak to..." I recognized the voice almost immediately...

(Sorry, wOw Memorial fans, but this sounds somewhat important- In place of this, here's something to keep your attention...) I proceeded to have some of the wOw wrestlers go into Super-Deformed Mode and dance around for the readers' amusement while I took the call. After a fairly long call, I headed back to see the others...

Lori Angel: "Hey, what's the big idea of having us go into Super-Deformed Mode for a half hour, Tom? You know how much it hurts to do that..." I sincerely hoped the smile on my face didn't show the lie...

"Um...uh...sorry, guys. That was just Robbie on the phone...he said that he was going to be on TNA XPlosion this week, and wanted to make sure we were watching..."

Kari-chan: "Okay, that's all I needed to know! Just as long as you can watch it with me to continue our eternal story of love-love, Tommy-kun..."

"I see. Well, he asked for it, so, um, watch!" I hated leaving them in the wind, but hey- they're going to get the info soon enough from me...

Now, to head over to FYE and desperately try to gain less of an abhorrence to country-western music...

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

I wished I could say that the next XPlosion was great, I really did. I meant to go for it, at least from all the things I heard: Robbie said he was going to have a recurring role (that's allegedly somewhat large in it), and it was supposed to be the beginning of a bit of a push for Steve (that from what I know, is going to see some big changes in his generic "I'm just here to put on a bunch of cool moves" gimmick...but I may be digressing...) To add to that, I felt it was time to start watching more TNA, so to speak, so I needed to put it on anyways. Yes, it would have been nice to say XPlosion was great...but to tell the truth, I didn't see it.

I know, I know, I'm stupid, I told them I would, and I fucked up, but come on: I got bored, I took a nap, when I woke up it was 10:00 p.m. and the show was over. Luckily, I was able to see enough to fake my way through...

America's X-Cup Divisional Matches (representative country in parentheses):

Tag Team:

The Hart Foundation 2k3 (Team Canada) defeated Ashley Hudson and Michael Foster (Team Australia) (49 overall)

Singles: TAKA Michinoku (Team Japan) d. Jonny Storm (Team Britain), Alex Wright (Team Europe), and Elix Skipper (Team USA). After the match, The Amazing Red came down and claimed Skipper was the weak link, then challenged Skipper for his spot on Team USA. (68)

Michael Shane defeated CarWreck (63 overall)

Luckily, I was able to find a KaZaa video of the main interview for it- hopefully I could fake my way through if I was cornered...

Jocelyn Richter: "Now, Dave, that was an awesome match between Michael Shane and CarWreck, wasn't it?"

Dave Meltzer: "I suppose, if you like spotfests...no psychology for either one of them..."

Jocelyn: "Well, I know you'll be interested in the fact that earlier this week, I was invited to Newport, Rhode Island for a very large news in the America's X-Cup division, and I managed to get a tape...let's go!" A tape showed up of some stock footage, before Jocelyn showed up at a press conference...

Jocelyn: "Hello, NWATNA fans! I am Jocelyn Richter, and I was called here for huge news on the NWATNA circuit!" Just then, an older man came out and took the microphone.

Older man (Robbie Richter): "Hello, media people. I assume I need no introduction...well, at least not to these- civilized folks. For those...lesser people, my name is Robert Lowenstein. Everyone here in Newport knows of my success: bringing events that could add more...culture to us, and even helping those...baser people around here by promoting an outpost of the National Wrestling Alliance. After this, I have had some problems with this, mostly in the fact that they claim that their 'Team USA' in the America's X-Cup is the best. Well, it might be to those Tennessee hicks..." The crowd booed at that statement...

"...but I feel that the people of America need to be given a more civilized, higher class of representatives. Hence, I am here to announce the formation of the newest team in the tournament, to debut officially at the Super-X tournament: Team X-America2." A bunch of cameras flashed.

Jocelyn: "Excuse me, sir, but why would you do this? NWATNA already has an American representative, and most of them are doing good..."

Lowenstein: "What did you just do? Everyone knows you must be allowed to ask a question first, not blurt it out! *sniff* I'm just glad that my daughter wouldn't do something so...so base as that...anyways, have you noticed this? Team USA hasn't won that America's X-Cup yet. Hence, I have found a team of...of civilized people to take the cup for the truly worthy Americans, and I have looked throughout NWATNA for someone who is worthy of it. I found a captain for this team when looking through the roster of NWATNA; someone who has been doing well in NWATNA but never getting a shot to be a representative of Team USA, and who I feel would be able to help the Cup come to the United States. Hence, I present the captain of this team, Steve Evans." Steve Evans came out and shook hands with Lowenstein.

Evans: "Um...I'd just like to say that...I'm unhappy I never got my fair shake with Team USA, and while I don't agree with all the things Mr.Lowenstein says, if this will allow me a chance to try and get my country the America's X-Cup, then I'd be willing to work for him without a problem!"

Jocelyn: "Thank you. From Newport, I am Jocelyn Richter, and let's get back to the XPlosion action!"

(44)

Unfortunately, that's all I could find (and it was a fairly standard interview to boot:), but it looks like it'll work. (I'm already liking some of this stuff...) I found some of the results...

Chris Sabin d. Steve Evans to retain the X Title (60)

CM Punk d. Balls Mahoney (66)

The Amazing Red d. Elix Skipper to take his spot on Team USA (81)

As I looked through to get to the results, I saw a KaZaa link that said "XPlosion Video." Since I had time, I decided to download it and watch it...

I saw a small-screen go through and the bass line for "Goody Two Shoes" play as a black square came up, finally getting the line "NWATNA: Prepare...He is Coming..." A small smile went across my face as I clicked out of the advertisement and continued reading...

Legend d. Julio Dinero (54)

BG James talked about how he was going to kick Shane Douglas's ass... (81)

...And he does... (75)

Jeff Jarrett d. D'Lo Brown to retain the NWA World Championship (81)

Overall: 66

After finishing this, I logged off. I am SERIOUSLY going to have to work on how I'll bullshit my way out of missing out on this... ah, this is where the author's help can work...Reflecto? Enter the action and go into Super-Deformed Mode to explain this problem...please...?

(Um...uh...let me think... 'He was trying to book EWR while drafting his fantasy baseball team for this year, and in the rush to complete it, forgot to save the results for typing out the matches in Word [thus losing the results of the show]...(edit: If I can re-post today, can I please redraft the team that got added? *sniffle* My intended biggest hitter (Garciaparra) and best pitcher (Prior) both were out for most of the first half of the season, both closers are currently in the minor leagues (Aquilino Lopez, Mike MacDougal)...*cries* I wanna do-over!!!) will that work?)

"Oh, yeah, like THAT's believable...isn't this September?"

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

The next day, I headed towards the gym the Flagship tapings would be at and looked around. Robbie came up to me... (Crud...don't ask about the show, don't ask about the show...)

Robbie: "So, what did you think about XPlosion?" Be somewhat nice...

"Um...uh...it was...good...and...good..."

Robbie: "Thanks...It's great to be on TV again. In fact, I've been talking about getting an on-air role in AWAMLW...oh by the way, I've got the posters for the show Monday all set up..."

"What are we talking about again?"

Robbie: "Yeah- Finale's girlfriend was a real help on the advertising aspect...check it out!" I read it, and saw that match was apparently not on Monday's card...

"Looks okay...I assume that I'm on tonight?"

Robbie: "Yeah- we want to get as many of the regions that'll have Raw wrestlers in them on, if only to lower the people who'll have to be there Monday to a crawl. They'll be handed out in leaflets after the show, and they go up tomorrow morning on posters. You up for helping?"

"Sure- I'll do a little..."

Robbie: "Excellent. Oh, by the way, I was thinking- with how the angle's been going; I wanted to have your singles music be the same as the one we had Shane use during his last World Title reign back in 2001..."

"Okay; that song sounded cool..."

Robbie: "Perfect; we'll start using it tonight." Luckily, I had my stuff for this info, and headed to the Gorilla position to watch the show...

____________________________________________________________________

wOw Flagship started up, only this time with a video!

V/O:"In wrestling, everyone has the same dream. Sometimes, it's vaguely defined..." Scenes of each wrestler come up over a black background...

Danny Doring: "One day, I'll be a World Champion..."

Magical Girl Essa Rios: "Voy a llevar a cabo un título del mundo que en el lucha profesional de americano..."

V/O: "...for some, there's something to prove..."

Shannon Moore: "If I were to win a Heavyweight Title somewhere else..." The scene quickly changed to Paul London...

Paul London: "...the WWE would have to respect what cruiserweight wrestling can do!"

Samoa Joe: "When I win the wOw Heavyweight Title, then no one could deny me as the best wrestler in the indies today!"

Jeff Hardy: "If I win the wOw Heavyweight Title, no one can say I wouldn't deserve to return to the WWE!"

Cancer Boy: "If I manage to win the title- despite having only one leg- then I will finally show the world- that I'm not- a sideshow act!"

Chuck Palumbo: "I've done everything on a major scale a man can do except win a World Title; I can't think of a better place to do that than whacked Out wrestling!"

"...For some...it's about solidifying themselves as the best..."

Brandon Downard: "When I win the wOw Heavyweight Title, all the fighting I've done will pay off!"

Tito Ortiz: "Some great MMA fighters have held the wOw Heavyweight Title; if I can't do the same, then how can I be worth the hype?"

Devon Storm: "I've spent years proving I was one of the best in the indies before WWE gave me a shot- winning the wOw Heavyweight Title will be the perfect exclamation point to leave that scene on!"

"For some...it's about getting the recognition they deserve..."

Steve Evans: "I've been the face of wOw on a major scale too long; If I win the title, I'll finally get my moment in the sun!"

Jared Steele: "Finally, I get my chance to break out of the pack here in whacked Out wrestling!"

"...for some, it's a lifelong dream..."

Two small children are talking as fainter background images of Tom Goddard and Jocelyn Richter show up behind them.

Young boy: "When I grow up, one of us will be the wOw World Heavyweight Champion...promise?"

Young girl: "As long as we'll be able to celebrate it together; the one who holds it won't matter to me..."

"...for some, it's a moment of making their own path..."

Teddy Hart: "When I hold the wOw World Heavyweight Title, I will finally break out of my family's shadow..."

"...for some, it's even the culmination of evil mastery..."

Finale: "Once that title is in my grips...the world will tremble before me..."

V/O: "For the next weekend...16 dreams will enter the ring... but only one can come to fruition.

wOw FLAGSHIP

The Quarterfinals Start Tonight."

Carter: "WELCOME TO wOw FLAGSHIP! I am Madison Carter, and with me as always is Gristleizer!"

Gristleizer: "Tonight's a big night for anyone with wOw World Title dreams: The Quarterfinals in the wOw Title Tournament are beginning...apparently, right now!"

Just then, Teddy Hart's music hit as he headed to the ring...

Hart: "Okay, I'm here to kick some ass...where's Samoa Joe?" Samoa Joe's music played, but he didn't show up for a few minutes. After the music restarted, Robbie Richter came out...

Richter: "We're sorry, folks: It seems Samoa Joe is currently in Japan wrestling for Zero-One as we speak. However, this is not an excuse, in my opinion, to miss his quarterfinal matchup. Hence, it is my duty to disqualify Samoa Joe from the tournament and give Teddy Hart a bye into the Semifinals Monday night!" The crowd had a scattering of cheers as Teddy Hart left the ring!

Gristleizer: "This is a huge benefit for Teddy Hart- now he won't have to wrestle until Monday, giving him time to rest up more!"

(50)

Devon Storm v. "Cancer Boy" Zach Gowen

Okay. I can't say this enough: Zach Gowen is not worth having on roster. Sure, he'll give you name value, but he just plain can't wrestle. He's not as good as advertised, and while the fact that he's doing it on one leg is impressive, the fact remains that he does it at about half the skill of a talented two-legged guy. Devon Storm was unable to bring him to a good match this time, which is a shame- Storm's been a little overrated in my opinion, but the guy didn't deserve to be sentenced to a match this bad. Storm got the win, luckily: If Gowen can't put on a good show, he can't be my World Champion, thank you very much...

(59, 56, 52)

Tito Ortiz v. Jared Steele

Okay, some matches leave you questioning things. In this case, it was "What the hell did Jared Steele do to deserve this?" This doesn't mean the match was bad- the two put on a good show. Instead, this means that Steele appeared to be totally punished by the UFC star Ortiz, who appeared to totally shoot on Steele like nobody's business. As such, the match was fairly obvious at the end: Steele may be a good wrestler, but I'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who could win when one of the best MMA fighters in the world is shooting on them...

(61, 85, 65)

Chuck Palumbo v. Finale

Okay...this was better than I expected it to be, even if the crowd didn't think so. This was surprising: For a indy match with a WWE superstar and one of the top independent wrestlers in the world today, this crowd was DEAD. It was a shame- the match was actually one of the best matches I've seen Chuck Palumbo in in his career. Palumbo managed to toe the line between looking like an awesome wrestler against Finale and still making Finale look like a million bucks. Palumbo got the win, and I'd be hard-pressed to say he didn't deserve it after that performance- if he's putting more effort in wOw matches than he does in WWE matches, that's a sign he'd be worthy of holding the belt...

(39, 73, 50)

Paul London v. Brandon Downard

This is a surprising match to me. On the one hand, you have Paul London- one of the best high flyers in the world today. On the other- Brandon Downard- one of the best brawlers in the world today. Theoretically, this should have been a styles clash...until it ended up being one of the better styles clashes I've seen from wOw in this tournament. The two's immense talent may have helped, but they managed to make London look better than I've seen him in WWE, let alone in wOw before. Downard's brawling made him shine as well; he proved he's got the skill to be a big name here. London got the win, but I could possibly see Brandon Downard as a wOw World Champion after this...

(50, 86, 61)

After the match, I got myself psyched up for my big matchup. I overheard a voice in my head:

Teddy Hart: "Remember...use the force...no-sell everything..." I turned around...

"Um...you might not want to say that too loudly...people could hear that I'd do it..."

Hart: "That's for telling people I wanted to screw Vince McMahon, biotch!" Hart walked away as I continued waiting. I saw Shannon Moore was playing to the crowd. Just then, the opening strains of "Carmelina" hit (Ah, they picked the theme that I hoped they were talking about) as I headed out to the ring to my people, drinking in their cheers as I went to get through the first major test...

Tom Goddard v. Shannon Moore

Okay, I'm just as surprised on this match. Tom Goddard and Shannon Moore should theoretically be able to put on one of the best matches possible in the world, but didn't manage to wow me. Why did this not work? Oh yeah...possibly because Tom Goddard's mask keeps dropping and dropping as he goes from being arguably the top wrestler in the world today to being another Teddy Hart in the ring? In case you don't know why this has to go through, Goddard basically no-sold every move Shannon Moore made in the ring, making Moore look like a putz (well, not as much as the WWE does, but still...) This was surprising: I'd expect it from someone like Hart, but from a normally good seller like Goddard, it's almost astonishing (but then again, this IS the guy who apparently ditched out on a match to go have sex with one of his co-workers in AWAMLW and also basically staged an on-screen mutiny in the same fed...) Goddard got the win here, but I hope this is just another match in a short slump for Goddard and he can get back in his right mind before he finds himself blackballed in wrestling- his actions over the last few weeks are sending him in that direction...

(57, 73, 58)

Over: 56

Edited August 3, 2004 by Reflecto

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

(This was the results of a planned poster for the event. It was also supposed to be used for a prediction contest, but the fact that this is a re-post [combined with the fact that you people just plain don't deserve to get stuff from me until we're a hit ] is the major form of this...too bad, because my winners know I give REALLY good stuff out...)

THIS MONDAY

Live at the Ryan Center, Kingston, RI

whacked Out wrestling action: A Champion will be crowned!

Matches signed:

QUARTERFINAL wOw WORLD TITLE MATCHES:

Former WWE Superstar JEFF HARDY v. Former WWE Superstar "Magical Girl" ESSA RIOS

NWATNA Superstar STEVE EVANS v. Former ECW Superstar DANNY DORING

SEMIFINAL wOw WORLD TITLE MATCHES:

Hardy/Rios winner v. Evans/Doring Winner

WWE Superstar Devon "CROWBAR" Storm v. NWATNA Superstar TEDDY HART

WWE INTERPROMOTIONAL MATCH:

RAW Superstar TITO ORTIZ v. SMACKDOWN Superstar CHUCK PALUMBO

WWE Superstar PAUL LONDON v. AWAMLW Superstar TOM GODDARD

NATIONAL WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH:

"The Anti-Diva" Sharon Goddard v. Jamie Kogyaru

Plus: FATAL FOUR-WAY to determine the whacked Out wrestling World Heavyweight Champion!

Tickets only $20.00 at the door.

Come join us: We promise there won't be any dead cats or nothing, neither!

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

That Saturday, me and my friends headed into the locker room, almost certain that we were in for some trouble. Sure enough, when we got there, every eye was on us, and most of them appeared to be the "evil" variety. However, despite this, there seemed to be some pluses to it...well, not when I saw some figures rush towards me...

Teddy Hart: "Okay, punk! You do NOT perform mutiny on MLW! Let's take this outside!"

Alex Shelley: "Yeah, it's time for us to teach you about respect!" The two grabbed me and headed outside...where I was almost shocked at their reaction:

Shelley: "(DUDE! That was so...so...WOW! How the hell did you manage to freaking take over the AWAMLW show like that?)"

"(Would you believe really good networking skills?)"

Hart: "My respect goes out to you, Tom Goddard: Your screwjob skill is best. Please teach me your ability to screw an owner on that magnitude so that I may improve my craft..."

"Do not worry, young grasshopper- it is not as hard as you will think. Besides- taking over a relatively small show is easy: Taking over a Raw or Smackdown would be harder..."

Shelley: "I've got to get back in- I've been booked to be 'Jobber number 1' v. your friends Jared and John tonight...I assume this means I'm actually going to get pushed!"

"Cool, knock them dead..." I left the room as I overheard the two talking again...

AWA: Major League Wrestling

Your hosts are Mike Johnson and Joey Styles.

John Roche and Jared Steele v. Alex Shelley and Chance Beckett

Johnson and Styles began to call Steele and Roche 'The Mutiny', so I assume they're selling that as the team name. Surprisingly for a match involving one randomly-matched jobber team, this worked really well. Alex Shelley's proven to be so good with any partner he teams with on AWA TV that it borders on a psychic link...

(Super-Deformed Shelley: HEY, DON'T GIVE AWAY MY SECRETS, WRITER...)

(Oh, Sorry...)

...while Steele and Roche always come through with the goods. The two teams managed to put on an even match. Steele and Roche took the advantage...until Ken and Frank Shamrock came down the ramp and began attacking The Mutiny! The two Shamrocks attacked, allowing Shelley and Beckett to pull off a surprising upset victory! It was a good little jobber match that ended up being better than it was supposed to be.

(40, 89, 64)

After the match:

Shelley: (Hey, guys- I'm tired of being treated like a jobber in AWAMLW; I'm getting really over here, yet I never get anything close to a push. Mind if I join in on your mutiny?)

Steele: (Sure, I doubt the others will mind...luckily, we'll all know if you're trying to screw us over...)

After the match, Court H. Bauer came out to the ring and took a mic...

Bauer: "Ladies and gentlemen watching this pay-per-view: Last Monday night was a night that will live in infamy throughout the confines of the American Wrestling Association, and indeed, wrestling in general. The AWA has been through talent raids, dwindling crowds, and even its own closing, but it has thrived despite that. However, last Monday night, something occurred so reprehensible that it never happened in wrestling. Last Monday night, a group of active wrestlers for this company, apparently angry at their own alleged bad treatment in AWAMLW, took control of a AWA Underground and basically performed acts of mutiny against the American Wrestling Association. I have tried to get in touch with the leader of the company the group of angry wrestlers represent, but he has not answered my phone calls. Therefore, it is my duty to call out the wrestler who is apparently the ringleader. Since he lost the privilege to use his real name when he performed mutiny last week, I will solely refer to him as Harry Potsmoker. Potsmoker, get out here!" Just then, I heard my brother's old "No, We Swear This Isn't 'Through the Wire', Please Don't Sue" AWA theme come on as I headed out to the ring.

"I'm sorry...I don't enter the ring without my people- I don't want to set myself up for a fall..." I motioned to the back as the rest of the wOw guys and gals came out here.

Bauer: "Well, what's your problem with how we book this? I assume that's what you took AWAMLW over for..." I grabbed the mic.

"Our problem is simple. You have been mistreating the wOw stars who wrestle for AWAMLW since the moment you got us under your contract. These fans come out here to see us, and you repeatedly job us out to MLW guys who they don't really care about. Saturday just proved it- you proved you hate the wOw workers so much that you were willing to let Simon Diamond trash the AWA Global Tag Team title rather than give the belt to the people who he was scheduled to face, solely because we're wOw and he was MLW! We've had enough of this mistreatment, and we're going to make it end ASAP!"

Bauer: "I assume you're the spokesman for the group, Potsmoker?"

"Yes...that is why we're here. Your MLW people may falter, but I at least know that all of my loyal Death Eaters here will always have my back, and I them."

Bauer: "I see. So, they won't mind if you take their careers in your hands, then?"

"What are you talking about?"

Bauer: "Tonight, your little cadre will have to go through some problems:

On the first part, your group will only get to have AWAMLW jobs IF they can manage to hold an AWAMLW Title. You can choose one of your tag teams, and they'll fight for the Tag Titles tonight." I looked through the wrestlers, then decided:

"I have to choose? Well, tell your MLW boys to be prepared, because they're going to face the best team in the world today...and the wOw Tag Team Champions, the only TRUE Tag Team Champions out there...and...and Greeks...YOU KNOW, MEN FROM GREECE?"

Bauer: "Okay... But the problem is, since they're fighting to hold AWAMLW gold, the rest of your team must put their hopes on YOUR getting AWAMLW gold tonight. You see, you're going to fight in a match for your jobs...against the AWA World Champion, CHRISTOPHER DANIELS!" The crowd cheered at the news. "Oh, yeah, and remember, Potsmoker: You and your crew only get to keep your jobs if you can win an AWA Title..."

"If that's the stipulations, then be prepared, Bauer: My older brother beat your little butt-buddy for that belt once, and it seems like the perfect time to make Daniels's second title reign go UP...IN...SMOKE!"

(71)

Meanwhile, after the in-ring altercation, Christopher Daniels was WALKING~!around the back. Suddenly, Jerry Lynn came in and attacked Daniels...

Lynn: "I don't care who's facing you: As long as someone takes that belt off of you, I'll be happy!"

(79)

After the commercial break, Court H. Bauer was in back with Jerry Lynn...

Bauer: "Excuse me...why did you just attack Daniels? I know you have some issues with him, but dammit, Lynn, where's your sense of loyalty? A Minnesota wrestler like you..." The crowd gave some good cheap pops... "...should know about the great history of AWA wrestling in this area. When Daniels goes out there tonight, he's going to be defending all of the great AWA history in that match up against those punks from Providence trying to take down everything good about professional wrestling! Is your sense of anger at Christopher Daniels so much so that you can't see the greater good here?"

Lynn looked at Bauer...

Lynn: "If it means that Daniels gets beaten down, I really don't care who or what they're fighting for- just as long as they beat Daniels up to get what they want."

Bauer: "It's like that, huh? Well, maybe a match tonight with THE OUTSIDERS will teach you some respect for AWAMLW!" Court H. Bauer left the room as Jerry Lynn stood there.

Jamie Kogyaru v. Brett Downard

You know, I just love it when the Johnson and Styles try to cover something up- they were just so cute doing commentary for this match, billing Brett Downard as an evil 'wOw traitor' and billing my future wife as the angel representing AWAMLW with dignity. Um, news flash: Jamie Kogyaru's a wOw wrestler...remember? Holding the title that's really the wOw Women's Title? Either way, it was the same. The match was horrible to watch, as most inter-gender matches are, with Brett Downard pulling an 0.3 on the Andy Kaufman scale for this one. Kogyaru tried to carry him, but it's harder to carry a guy than a girl...their lack of boobies makes it hard to keep your interest when facing a crappy male wrestler. Either way, Sharon Goddard ran in and attacked Kogyaru, giving her a victory as the announcers sell this as treason and wonder why Sharon Goddard would help a wOw wrestler. Um...maybe the 'she IS a wOw wrestler' and 'Her younger brother's the ringleader of the wOw wrestlers' would be good places to start out...

(38, 57, 47)

(Global Tag Titles) Youthanazia v. Who: Betta Than Kanyon v. The SAT v. The Men From Greece

Yeah, this is a styles clash: You've got two great high-flying teams (Youthanazia and the SAT), one great brawling team (MFG), and one team with a style all their own (Who: Betta than Kanyon.) This match had an easy start, as all three teams attacked the Men From Greece while the referee looked the other way. However, since the Men From Greece can, you know, weigh enough to match up with the smaller teams in the match, it wasn't too much of a problem. The three teams kept attacking the Men From Greece. Finally, The Men From Greece started using their skills to attack, hitting a Big Fat Greek Suplex on Joel Maximo and Josh Prohibition simultaneously, sending them out of the ring. The two then proceeded to hit a HOPA! Elbow on M-Dogg 20 as the referee was forced to count a 3 for it. A similar action occurred on Jose Maximo, before the two were left against WHO: Betta Than Kanyon. Chris Kanyon began attacking the two relentlessly, as the referee allowed massive double-team moves, weapons, and even got a couple of kicks in himself on Nico when he was on the mat. Chris Kanyon covered Nico quickly, as the referee had his hand hit three times without barely having his hand leave the mat, giving Who: Betta Than Kanyon the tag titles! The two celebrated in the ring as Nico and Stavros attacked the referee, giving him a Big Fat Greek Suplex for their troubles.

(48, 82, 65)

(Global Cruiserweight Title):Sonjay Dutt v. Teddy Hart

WOW. Now this is the match I had heard Teddy Hart could have, and the breakout match I knew Sonjay Dutt would eventually have in his career. The two managed to put on an awesome show out there, meshing fairly well as they pulled off an amazing amount of moves. The match's pace was almost perfect, ending up as one of the better Cruiserweight title matches I've seen in AWAMLW. Dutt got the win of course, but I wouldn't mind Teddy Hart getting a bigger push in the AWA Cruiserweight division...

(43, 92, 67)

Ariel: "Now, AWAMLW fans, it's time once again for the 'Bret Hart Whines About Montreal' Show! Here's your host, Bret Hart!"

Bret Hart: "Thank you, thank you. A round of applause for my new assistant Ariel- since my last assistant decided to turn against AWAMLW, I needed to find a new one...let's give her a hand!" The crowd cheered. "Now,everyone knows about the problems from this. In order to find an answer, I decided to go to one of the members of this mutiny. Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to present, Jeff Richter!" Jeff Richter came out to the show and sat down next to Bret Hart.

Jeff Richter: "Thank you, Bret, I'm happy to be here!"

Bret: "Now, Jeff, the world wants to know: Why did you do it?"

Richter: "It's simple: You know exactly what it's like when promoters screw you around, give you treatment that you don't deserve, and make your life miserable, right? Well, we decided to do something about it!"

Bret: "Well, of course I do...but don't you think there was a better option?"

Richter: "Why?"

Bret: "Come on- everyone deserves a chance. Like me: I was screwed around for a long time. I gave people a chance to do something right- a chance to discipline Shawn Michaels...when I knew they were going to pull something, I still showed up...I did the right thing, showing up at Survivor Series...all I wanted was to not have to job to Shawn Michaels in Canada...then VINCE MCMAHON SCREWED ME!" Bret began to sob...

Richter: "There, there...let it all out, big guy...who's a modern-day wrestling legend?"

Bret: "I am..."

Richter: "That's right...do you see what we're coming from here? It's like Court H.Bauer is our personal Vince McMahon, so to speak..."

Bret: "I see..."

Richter: "That's why I'd like to tell everyone; good wOw superstars are still available to work your shows! Call 1-800-WOW-STAR today! Order now, and we'll put you in a lottery to get to have the next AWA World Champion, Harry Potsmoker, work shows for you! Call in the next 5 minutes, and he'll trash the AWA belt on your indy show at NO EXTRA CHARGE!" (72)

The Outsiders v. Jerry Lynn

Okay...this was surprisingly good for what it was. On the one hand, you have Jerry Lynn, one of the best in the world today. On the other hand, you have- Scott "Alka" Hall and Kevin "OW! MY FUCKING QUAD!" Nash: The Outsiders- about 10 years past their prime. And somehow, it worked. The Outsiders always had some good teamwork, and their chemistry's immaculate. That allowed the fans to get into the fact that, hey, Jerry Lynn's actually a really good wrestler... The Outsiders were able to get over that "Lynn's being sent to the woodshed" feeling, beating the crap out of him to get over this lesson. When Nash finally got to pin the current number one contender, you know he was pleased as punch (though if this leads to him beating Daniels for the AWA Title, I will snap...) All in all, much better than I expected.

(76, 82, 79)

(AWA World Title): Christopher Daniels v. Harry Potsmoker

This is one of those matches where it looked like both wrestlers were holding back, personally. I wouldn't doubt why- both wrestlers would have a reason to think that (Daniels because Potsmoker's mutiny would leave him open to shooting on him to screw the AWA over, Potsmoker because Daniels has a history of shooting on him and causing injury, thus making it more likely he'd do it for this...). As a result, for a hardcore match, it was less violent than it could have been. Add to this the fact that Daniels and Potsmoker are just not attuned to wrestling hardcore matches, and it put them out of their element. A nice straight-up match would have really done both wonders, IMO. Harry Potsmoker eventually took advantage, hitting a series of nice moves on Daniels. Potsmoker set up a table, and had just hit his top-rope Tiger Driver (that the announcers were calling the Babylon Fall instead of the My Final Heaven for some reason), when Steve Corino came into the ring and attacked Potsmoker with a series of stiff-looking attacks and weapon shots! Corino then put Daniels on top of Potsmoker, giving Daniels the victory! After the match, the two cheered as Court H. Bauer came out and tried to lead the fans in a "Na Na Na Na, Na Na Na Na, Hey Hey Hey, Goodbye..." chant (only getting about half the crowd to do so- apparently, there's a nugget of truth in their claims...) Decent bout by anyone's standards, but these two can do much better.

(78, 84, 81)

(71)

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

The next night was fairly big; as since it was Summerslam, Robbie had a Pay-Per-View parties for most of the workers. It was pretty cool- have most of the wOw stars over, get to see the PPV for free, and just chill out. This time, with how big the next night was, it was almost a time of relaxation for it. Unfortunately, since he was all getting his IWA-MS on, Jared couldn't be there. I wondered what was going on there...but decided against it and decided to watch the show...

Meanwhile, earlier that day, Jared Steele was backstage setting up the plan...

Jared: "So, you think this gimmick will work?"

Wrestler: "Of course it will- IWA-Mid South already said our plans. Now, let's go make this work."

Jared: "You have your motivation, right?"

Wrestler: "You got it, man...now let's go kick some ass." Jared and his partner went into the locker room and waited for their matchup on the card...

Jimmy Jacobs v. Alex Shelley

Ladies and gentlemen, I am officially disappointed. Everyone who knows indy wrestling knows that one of the most blue-chip good matches in the indy scene today is Jimmy Jacobs against Alex Shelley. However, this time...it was not as good as usual. That's a nice way of saying, it came in to party and ended up passed out on the couch with frat boy dong in its mouth. The match had its problems, mostly with the two misusing their characters. The characters played too much of a role in this- during it, Jacobs started with his typical "HUSS HUSS!" motif. Unfortunately, this time he kept yelling "HUSS! HUSS! HUSS!" throughout most of the match...

Shelley: (Dude, what's the problem!)

Jacobs: (It's...I see them...I can't shake them this time...) Suddenly, after a few minutes of HUSS-ing, Shelley quickly rolled up Jacobs- a poor end to one of their poorest matches. I'll give these two the benefit of the doubt this time, at least. Jacobs left the ring still shouting "HUSS!" for some reason that I'm unsure of, myself...

(19, 68, 43)

After the match, the two headed back into the locker room as Jared headed up to them...

Jared: "(Dude, what's the problem?)"

Shelley: "(Maybe this is a good time to let you in on something about Jimmy...)"

Jared: "(What?)"

Shelley: "(To put it simply...Jimmy Jacobs sees dead people...)"

Jared: "(Oh, sure- like I'm supposed to believe that? You guys watched Sixth Sense last night on the bus over here, didn't you?)"

Shelley: "(Is it harder to believe than a psychic? Besides, Jimmy sees more than that: Angels, demons, all your general manner of spirit. When he says 'HUSS', that's him trying to send the spirits away so that he can wrestle in peace...)"

Jared: "(I just thought he was a Berzerker mark...)"

Shelley: "(Who do you think he learned how to control the spirits from? You wouldn't guess, but The Berzerker was one of America's best paranormal mages outside the ring in his time...)"

Jared: "(I see...will he be all right?)"

Shelley: "(He'll probably have to leave the arena- I'd bet that they built it on one of those ancient Indian burial grounds again...that's what usually happens for this...)"

Jared: "(Okay. I'll see you later...)"

Shelley: "(Okay- kick some ass, dude!)" The two headed out of the arena as Jared headed back to watch more of the show... (Bet you didn't see THAT coming, now didja?)

In the ring, the Boogie Knights were on the mic...

Drake: "Hey, IWA-MS! Tonight, me and my partner are pissed off! We're one of the best teams in IWA-MS, and yet we were not allowed to go into the Tag Team Title four-way!"

Tobin: "That's why we'll challenge any team in back tonight to fight us right now!" Suddenly, Demolition came into the ring to a chorus of boos from the vampires in the audience for a match!

The Boogie Knights v. Demolition

This match was...surprisingly good. The Boogie Knights were able to run with Demolition, who proved they still have it as a tag team for this match. The crrowd was just DEAD during the match, almost as a protest that Demolition would be added to their IWA-Mid South roster; a shame, as like I said, the two put on a decent show for themselves. The crowd booed more when the finish occurred, as Demolition got the win; apparently proving they're not just a one-night thing for it. A good match that was ruined by the crowd being DOA.

(27, 87, 57)

Ryan Wing, Danny Dominion, Jerrelle Clark, Japanese Pool Boy- Four-Way (IWA Light Heavyweight)

This was not as good as I would have expected. I like work from all of these workers, but together it was just...blah. Part of it might have been the previous match- many people were leaving the arena as Demolition headed into the ring. Despite this, the four tried their best, but it ended up overbooked. Danny Dominion and Japanese Pool Boy were quickly eliminated from the match, leaving Clark and Wing to put on a match. The two gave it the old college try, but were unable to do anything much to get the fans back into it. Ryan Wing got the victory, but at the cost of all the fans who had left the arena early due to this.

(23, 73, 48)

After the match, a group of people who appeared to be bad ripoffs of wrestlers came to the ring in full force! Adam Flash took the mic...

Flash: "Hello all! Who here came to see the IWA?" The crowd coughed... "Who here came to see the...um...I...W...A?" The crowd also coughed again. "Tell them what it is, Z-man!" Another worker came over...

Zeeboe: "Well, you know something, Mr. Greenjeans, Zeeboe's here to take control of the IWA-Mid South! Who wants to be first on my reign of terror, and WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN ZEEBOE AND THE IMPRESSION WORLD ALLIANCE RUN WILD ON YOU?" Just then, "It's Not Unusual" hit over the mic as a man in green bodypaint and blue tights came to the ring, lipsynching all the way!

Man: "You people don't deserve to be at the top of this! Right now, these ladies want to see one, and only one: The Martian Lounge Singer, Mister T'Omm J'Onzz! I am here to teach all the people in this area how to rock- Lounge Style!" (Re-Release Notes: After some of the gimmicks that I personally have come up with and my frequent admittance of having a crack team of assistants who help on many portions of wOw Memorial, the question would have to be whether these assistants are as borderline-insane as I am. For those who wonder that, I submit to you the character of T'Omm J'Onzz- created by a meeting of the minds which went from just giving Nathan Jones a Martian Manhunter gimmick [already somewhat insane], then separating the character and adding a Tom Jones gimmick on to that to make something that I sincerely doubt anyone else could have come up with. We now return you to our regularly scheduled programming...")

T'Omm J'Onzz v. Zeeboe

Okay...this match was horrible. I had heard horror stories about Zeeboe from friends who follow whacked Out wrestling, and J'Onzz was not good enough to carry him. I'd like to see J'Onzz against someone with talent, as if Zeeboe is this bad, J'Onzz is still a question mark as to his own talent. J'Onzz won with a Senton Bomb (that announcers called the Sex Bomb). Now, to see him against someone good.

(16, 52, 34)

After that match, Jared got ready and headed out into the ring with his partner, looking at their six opponents. Steele took a mic...

Jared: "Hello, IWA fans. Now, you may notice that there's been a few changes to your normal Mid South action tonight. I am pleased to say, this is MY doing!" The crowd gave huge heat at that claim. "My name is Jared Steele, and I represent the Redemption Crew. You see, you people do not know what is necessary in wrestling. It is supposed to be the sport of gentlemen, not a sport of idiots cutting each other with cheese graters! I would like to show everyone my first success story- the first of many in IWA-MS!" Jared gave the mic to his partner:

Wrestler: "Greetings, people. My name is Vance Nevada. Before, I thought that wrestling did not need order, indeed, the world not needing order. Then...then I saw what people had thought of me. I saw people on the Internet, thinking that I was some idiotic freak who was unworthy of any semblance of respect. Then...then Jared Steele and the Redemption Crew helped make me see the light. Now, I am dedicated to helping eradicate these lesser people, and showing some respect for wrestling, and indeed, for the world as a whole!"

Jared: "Remember, kiddies: You can watch someone get their head blown off in the movies, watch people dying over the TV news, but the appearance of one breast for a couple seconds will make people shoot up their school!"

The Redemption Crew v. The Strykers , Midnight Express, Rock N' Roll Express

The Redemption Crew are, as was said in their promo, wOw prospect Jared Steele and Canadian star Vance Nevada. The Strykers are indy star Matt Stryker and New England non-star Mike Stryker (no relation, though they're claiming there is.) If you don't know who the Midnight Express and Rock and Roll Express are, stop reading this report right now and go find some of their classic work. The match was pretty poor- the result of two teams in it making their first teamup in this match. Even classic teams like the Midnights and Rock and Rolls couldn't keep it going. The Strykers were quickly disposed of, however the Redemption Crew were not. The two tried to bring these unknown players into the match, but Nevada and Steele managed to win the match despite this. Are they trying to make the worst team of them all win it?

(46, 70, 58)

Meanwhile, in back...

Sophie: "Did they just talk about the Redemption Crew?"

Josh: "Really did it- cat's out of the bag..."

Sophie: "GET HIM!"

In the ring, the Redemption Crew celebrated with their titles. Suddenly, four large guys came out and went to attack them! Steele and Nevada ran to the stands, only to find some more coming down the ramp. A woman then proceeded to grab them beforehand and help them out of the arena as chaos ensued...

Woman: "So, you really told about the Redemption Crew?"

Jared: "What are you talking about? I just found a paper and thought it would be a cool gimmick. Vance here agreed; we decided to run with it. Is this a problem?"

Woman: "*sigh* I KNEW these wrestlers are idiots... you just stumbled onto something very big. Much bigger than you could expect."

Jared: "Yeah, yeah...I need to get back to Rhode Island for a live show tomorrow...you want to come, Vance? Might be a spot for you at wOw..."

Vance: "Aren't we going to stay for the rest of the show?"

Woman: "Don't bother... the other matches were...

Mr.Hughes d. Colt Cabana (42, 61, 51)

Hawk Younkins d. Brutus Beefcake by Kenny King interference (39, 57, 48)

Earthquake d. Spanky (54, 67, 60)

20 Man Battle Royal for the IWA-MS Heavyweight Title:

1) Ahmed Johnson eliminated by Butterbean

2) Barry Windham eliminated by Rick Steiner

3) Big Bossman eliminated by Shawn Stasiak

4) Kamala eliminated by Bryan Adams

5) Chaz Warrington eliminated by Brian Lawler

6) Doink the Clown eliminated by Jake Roberts

7) Alex Wright eliminated by Brian Lawler

8) Rick Steiner eliminated by Big Vito

9) Eric Angle eliminated by Marty Jannetty

10) Oklahoma eliminated by Brian Lawler

11) Mr. Hughes eliminated by Butterbean

12) Butterbean eliminated by Big Vito

13) Chris Hero eliminated by Marty Jannetty

14) Marty Jannetty eliminated by Jake Roberts

15) Shawn Stasiak eliminated by Big Vito

16) Brian Adams eliminated by Mabel

17) Brian Lawler eliminated by Jake Roberts

18) Big Vito eliminated by Jake Roberts

19) Mabel eliminated by Jake Roberts

(53, 51, 52)"

Jared: "Excellent. I'm going back to Rhode Island- you want to come, Vance? I can see if I can get you work at wOw..."

Vance: "I guess so- beats actually slacking off for another month waiting to wrestle more for IWAMS..."

Woman: "Wait a second...you two are in grave danger. The real Redemption Crew's going to be looking for you! If you're going, I'm definitely going."

Jared: "Suit yourself- the more the merrier."

Woman: "Well, okay. By the way, the name's Melissa Hardy...my friends call me Missy..."

Jared: "Jared Steele...my friends call me...um...Jared..."

Woman: "Charmed..." The three headed off to the wOw show the next day...

(48)

"So, think the IWA show is over yet?"

Steve: "Who cares? SUMMERSLAM CALLS, BABY!" We sat around and began to watch as the pre-show started...

Jonathan Coachman: "Welcome to the Summerslam Free-For-All! I'm Jonathan Coachman, and with me is Al Snow! Just in case you haven't ordered yet, we've got some big matches, including one by some of our boys from Raw, as Shane Goddard and Steve Blackman will be taking on Rico and Nicholas Dinsmore..."

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

Summerslam results (RAW):

Shane Goddard and Steve Blackman v. Rico and Nicholas Dinsmore

This match was one of the hotter matches I've seen as a Heat opener, especially when it wasn't supposed to be this way. I didn't think it'd be bad: Dinsmore's a very good wrestler, Rico's one of my guilty pleasures, Blackman's been red-hot in the ring since he returned from injury, and Goddard's been awesome for the most part in WWE. The two teams managed to put on a good show, using each of their skills fairly well (especially considering neither team really had much experience together.) Steve Blackman hit a Pump Kick on Nicholas Dinsmore, but Miss Jackie proceeded to distract him, then hit him with a Greco-Roman Nut Shot, sending him down to the mat. Meanwhile, Goddard set Rico up for the Godd-Hand...until a man (who friends who watched are claiming is indy standout Brad Richter) came down the ramp and attacked Goddard, hitting a nice Samoan Drop on him off of the ropes! Rico rolled Goddard up, as the four celebrated in the ring!

(65, 85, 75)

The Dudley Boyz v. Diamond and Swinger

JR and King sell the fact that the winner of this match would get a shot at the Two Bad MF'ers later that night. The two teams didn't really mesh as well as I had hoped: It says something that the match before it was higher quality despite the fact that neither of those teams had spent more than a month together, while these teams have spent anywhere from 5 years to a decade teaming. The two teams were better than most, but weren't able to really get through on this. Bubba Ray Dudley proceeded to get the advantage, and set Johnny Swinger up for the WASSUP! Headbutt...but Dawn Marie hit the ropes , sending D-Von Dudley down. (Wow, the same finish for the last two matches? How...unoriginal...)With D-Von down, Simon Diamond attacked Bubba Ray and hit the Problem Solver, then put Swinger on top to give them the victory!

(67, 79, 73)

Jerry Lawler v. John Heidenreich

Sometimes, you just know a match is going to be horrid in the ring. This is one of those times. Nothing personal, but a really bad hoss and a really past-his-prime announcer can't really put on a good match. This was no exception to the rule, as it ended up being an overbooked extravaganza. 90% of the match involved Lawler trying to attack Heidenreich and Heidenreich running away, with some examples of Ms.Joni verbally warning Lawler. Some extras occurred, with The King of Pop attacking Heidenreich from outside the ring, but nothing major happened. Finally, Ms.Joni came into the ring to attack Lawler...only for Lawler to hit a Piledriver on her to the delight of the crowd! With no one to help Heidenreich, Heidenreich backed into the ringpost...only to have Booker T run down to the ring and attack Lawler! Booker T hit a Book End on Lawler, allowing Heidenreich to pin him! Poor wrestling, but it worked as a comedy match, at least...

(62, 63, 62)

Two Bad MF'ers v. Diamond and Swinger

Now, this is what I'm talking about. These two teams were able to get it done in the ring, putting on an awesome match together. Maybe Diamond and Swinger were saving it up for the major title match, maybe Diamond and Swinger and the Dudleyz didn't click, but the two teams managed to put on a showcase. Dawn Marie attempted to work her magic for her team, only to have Alexis Laree stop her, leading to a catfight outside the ring. In the ring, Simon Diamond went for another Problem Solver...only to have Shannon Moore and Matt Hardy rush the ring and attack! The 4 -on-2 attack was too much, as the Two Bad MF'ers managed to get the big victory!

(67, 88, 77)

AJ Styles v. Chris Benoit

Okay, one pay-per-view, one dream matchup...and the best part is, it actually worked well! These two were just awesome when put together, putting on a match that should rightfully get MOTY cred in the future. AJ Styles proved he isn't just a big fish in a small pond with this matchup, as he and Benoit's skills managed to mesh in a good form for it. To add to the "run-in" victories here, Maven rushed the ring and channelled all his "I'm the Intercontinental Champion and I don't merit a PPV matchup?" force into clocking Benoit with the title, before dropping the belt, allowing Styles to hit a Styles Clash onto the title belt! Styles got a win, and Raw goes 5-for-5 on matches ending on run-ins tonight. Not a bad match, which could have worked as a main event...

(83, 91, 87)

Triple H v. Shawn Michaels

...but of course it couldn't, seeing as HHH v. Shawn Michaels has main-evented for Raw for most of the past few PPVs. The match had everything the rest of the HHH/HBK matches has had: Triple H starts off on the offensive, Michaels uses his MAGICAL JESUS POWER~! to get back into the game, and proceeds to use all his best stuff on HHH. However, HHH no-sells most of it, Kick, Wham, Pedigree, match over, let's all masturbate HHH's ego again- and this time, with every Raw undercard match ending in a run-in but this one, it's even moreso of one: Apparently, HHH is the only Raw wrestler who can win a match cleanly! Geez, luckily these Smackdown matches worked better, or else I would be pissed...

(90, 77, 86)

(78)

( Re-Release Notes: You say bad booking, I say "necessary to make it look like a bad PPV"...

Assistant: "I say Reflecto just got lazy, and he needs to come back to wOwfed before he fritters away all the talent he had there..."

I am NOT taking requests from my peanut gallery...)

After the show ended, the others left, as I proceeded to head for bed. Either tomorrow will be the biggest day in my career or one of the biggest heartbreaks I could have, and either way, I'd best get a good night's rest...

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

(TIME: 3:30 a.m.[EST], Providence, Rhode Island.)

That night, I was unable to really sleep...

Joey Styles: "Daniels is close...he's reaching the title...WE HAVE A NEW AWA CHAMPION, and MLW recieves Weekly Pay-Per-Views and the title of the American Wrestling Association!" Suddenly, the scene rewinded...

Joey Styles: "Daniels is close...he's reaching the title...WE HAVE A NEW AWA CHAMPION, and MLW recieves Weekly Pay-Per-Views and the title of the American Wrestling Association!" The scene rewinded again...

Joey Styles: "Daniels is close...he's reaching the title...WE HAVE A NEW AWA CHAMPION, and MLW recieves Weekly Pay-Per-Views and the title American Wrestling Association!" Just as the scene was about to rewind once more, it stopped up, as that girl Finale was dating came into play holding some stuff...

Kasuga: "Falcon! Eggplant! Mount Fuji!"

"What the hell is this about?"

Kasuga: "You might want to wake up right now..." I sprung up from this and was slightly confused...I mean, she's not my type, so I probably didn't want to drill her...so why would she appear in my dream? I tried to get some sleep after this...today's when it all happens.

(Time: 5:00 p.m.[EST], Uncasville, Connecticut.)

That night, the WWE was getting ready to broadcast from Mohegan Sun in their first post-Summerslam Raw. Shane Goddard and Bradley Richter went through to see the booking sheet that night...

Shane: "So, Brad- how the hell did you get out of development so quick?"

Bradley: "Come on- they had me in OVW for training, but they saw how crisp and WWE-style I already was, so they made the call to promote me ASAP..did you expect anything else?"

Shane: "Not at all, old friend- welcome to the big time."

Bradley: "I know. In addition, I checked the board- My first official WWE match is going to be against you, Shane!"

Shane: "Awesome, man: Wouldn't want it any other way. It's close enough to home- let's steal the show!"

Bradley: "That reminds me: Tonight's the big wOw show: It's close enough to here so we might be able to make it."

Shane: "Hmmm...what would we say on this...somehow, I doubt Vince would like it if we asked him 'Excuse me, can we take off after our early match so we can go to a rival federation's major show?"

Bradley: "Well, tell him, but don't TELL him. Besides, he's been acting really nice lately; he might allow it..."

(Time: 6:00 p.m [EST]. Uncasville, Connecticut.)

Shane Goddard: "Excuse me, Vince, I had a question to ask you..."

Vince: "Sure thing...what is it?"

Shane G.: "Well, since we're so close to our home in Rhode Island, me and Bradley here were wondering if it would be possible for us to leave right after our match so that we can get to visit with our families a little bit longer: as it stands, we probably wouldn't get home until around 1:00 a.m, when they'll be asleep..."

Vince: "Well, I don't see any major problem with that. Go ahead..."

Shane G.: "Thanks, sir..." Shane left to go tell Bradley the good news.

Bradley: "You're serious? He's allowing us to go there?"

Shane G: "Well, come on: I didn't lie: We ARE going to go visit our families, right?"

Bradley: "Genius!" The two hit a 'jumping-white guy-high five" as they went to script out their match.

(Time: 6:00 [EST], Kingston, Rhode Island.)

"This looks like an awesome crowd...I can't believe we're able to fill this place!"

Robbie: "Come on: It's the hottest indy fed in the country and a large amount of established stars are on the card..."

"I see. Well, I'll just have to channel my brother and do some show-stealing tonight, then...I'm up at about 7:45, right?"

Robbie: "Not even close...I got word from the Wrestling Network: They're putting us on opposite Raw tonight- you know, give us a tryout to see if we can handle prime-time. You're going to have to be able to carry this roster..."

"Yikes..."

Robbie: "Don't worry about it. You can spike ratings...remember the Super 8?" BAD MOVE, Spaaaaaaaaaace Cadet...

"Um...I'm trying to suppress that memory..."

Robbie: "No problem...break a leg..." I winced at the comment. "Um...bad choice of words..." I left to go attempt to get myself psyched up for the matchup. I headed towards my locker, only to find a new set of trunks and boots inside with a somewhat different style, this one having blue, yellow, and white lines that almost looked like a strand of DNA on each side, covered with mostly bright orange backgrounds. I checked a note next to them...

______________________________________________________________

Tom:

Nothing personal, but I couldn't have you go out there tonight not wearing your dad's traditional colors for your trunks...consider these a gift after what's going to occur...

Robbie...

_______________________________________________________________

(Time: 9:00 p.m[EST]. Uncasville, CT.)

The pyro went off as Raw started...

JR: "WELCOME TO RAW! I am Jim Ross, and alongside me is Jerry "The King" Lawler, still smarting from last night's loss!"

King: "Laugh it up, JR: That was such a screwjob not even PUPPIES could cheer me up!" Just then, Rico's theme music came on as Rico and his 'disciples' Nicholas Dinsmore and Bradley Richter came to the ring accompanied by Miss Jackie.

JR: "Well, there's a way to see if that's true, King..."

King: "What'd you say? I'm too distracted by the PUPPIES!"

Lillian Garcia: "Making his way to the ring, at 240 lbs., from Los Angeles, California, Wendi, er, Bradley Richter!" Richter recieved a small amount of pops from local fans knowing where he was really from as he headed into the ring.

JR: "The debut match here tonight for young Bradley Richter, apparently stemming from his helping Rico and Nicholas Dinsmore win last night on the PPV Pre-show..." Just then, "Same Old Song" hit as Shane Goddard headed to the ring accompanied by Steve Blackman for the match.

Garcia: "And his opponent, weighing in at 250 lbs., from Providence, Rhode Island, 'Showtime' Shane McMahon,er,Goddard!" The fans gave a surprisingly large cheer for the heel Goddard as he came to the ring.

Richter: "I guess you're working the face here..."

Goddard: "I guess..."

Bradley Richter v. Shane Goddard

This match was actually a surprisingly good affair. I had known that Goddard and Richter had worked together countless times in the past, but this is one of those things where you don't know exactly how good it is until you see it for yourself. The two's in-ring chemistry was outstanding, and I really would like to see these two go at it more often. The two were able to call and reverse out of 90% of their moves- a Samoan Drop became a Crucifix Pin, as did a Goddardsmack- a DDT became a backdrop, and so on. Rico tried to interfere on Richter's behalf, only to have Steve Blackman give a quick chairshot to the back, sending him down. However, Miss Jackie got to the ropes and flashed Shane Goddard, allowing Richter to hit the Samoan Drop (which the announcers called the H-Bomb Post-Nuclear Apocalyptic Death Driver for some reason...), getting a victory!

( Re-Release Notes: This match is a rarity- in order to solidify the time period for each one and get the best view of this possible, I simulated AWAMLW Underground and Raw for this, solely booking wOw Sin. Due to the Raw simulation, that led this to be the only match in the diary (so far) that was not simulated by Extreme Warfare Revenge. Considering how many matches are here, that isn't too bad...)

JR: "An impressive win for Bradley Richter in his debut match..."

King: "I'd say Goddard got the win here- he got to see the PUPPIES!"

JR: "Wasn't that stuff what got you into that match last night in the first place?"

King: "Come on...that was...last night..."

After the match, the two quickly left the ring, making it look like Shane Goddard was chasing Richter and his cronies. The two kept running after they got off camera, heading for their cars in the parking lot.

Shane: "Let's rock..."

(9:00 p.m.[EST], Kingston, Rhode Island.)

wOw Sin

Your hosts are RD Reynolds and Tony Schiavone.

Steve Evans v. Danny Doring

I was honestly surprised that this match managed to work. Evans is more of a spot wrestler and a high flyer, while Doring's more of a mat wrestler for this. Despite that obvious style clash, the two managed to put on a good show for the fans. The fans seemed to be fairly hot for the match (well, by indy standards), and a good time was had during it. Detective Chris Hamrick then proceeded to come down the ramp and lay in wait for Doring to go over. Hamrick saw a place when Evans Irish-whipped Doring, and put a chair in between the ropes...but Doring reversed the Irish Whip, sending Evans into the chair! Doring rolled up Evans, and Hamrick fumed as Danny Doring celebrated his advancing in the tournament. Hamrick then took a mic...

Hamrick: "Laugh now, Doring...but tonight, I deduct that you won't be so happy when you see my newest weapon to fight you!"

(50, 82, 66)

Jeff Hardy v. Magical Girl Essa Rios

Remember how surprised I said I was when the last match succeeded? Well, guess what: This match paid us all back for that karma...I was just as surprised that Jeff Hardy and Essa Rios, two very good high flyers, didn't mesh well together in this matchup. Botched spots were the order of the day as these two just didn't make it worth my while to watch it. I was more surprised after all the good matches Jeff Hardy has had in the indies recently- this was just an off-matchup. Jeff Hardy got the win, which is a good thing- Hardy is likely to be able to be a good World champion for wOw...

(47, 74, 60)

After that matchup, I was approached by Jared...

"Dude...what's been going on?"

Jared: "You wouldn't believe it if I told you...this is some crazy stuff..." Just then, I met with two people beside him...

"Oh...I see you finally found a lady friend...and a guy friend? Well, whatever floats your boat..."

Vance: "Um, it's not like that...I'm just his IWA-MS tag partner, and she's just some random girl who accosted us and forced us to take her with us..."

Ms. Hardy: "Yes, your friend here made a big mistake...now I'm going to make sure he doesn't pay for it."

"I see..."

Jared: "Oh, Vance was wondering if he could get a job here...he doesn't have much of a gimmick, though- he could use some help there..."

"Hmmm...let me think...I've got it? You know Quagmire from Family Guy, right? How about we make Vance here a second-rate Quagmire ripoff, then push him to the moon?" All four went silent, then laughed out loud.

Jared: "Come on, Tom: Who the hell would want to see Vance Nevada do that type of gimmick?" (Re-Release Notes: Any similarity of that gimmick to any that appear in any more "well-known" diaries than wOw Memorial is, um, completely unintentional...I swear, really! )

"I know, I know- I was just messing with ya, man..." I walked off to get psyched up for my match as they stayed and talked...

Devon Storm v. Teddy Hart

Now, this is the type of match I'm talking about: We've seen a match that was supposed to be average and was good, a match that was supposed to be good and was average, and now this: A match that was supposed to be good and was. The two managed to mesh fairly well, surprising because Storm's not as known for his aerial moves as he was. The only problem was the ending: In a match which could have easily been a former top indy star passing his torch to a new indy star before officially joining the WWE, Devon Storm picked up the win. Not a bad match, other than that...

(56, 86, 71)

After that, I was ready for my first match. Jocelyn headed over to me...

Jocelyn: "Okay- let's get this show on the road!"

"You know it..." We headed out for the stuff for our matchup with Paul London, only to have a series of fans keep trying to attack us as we walked through towards the ring...

Reynolds: "You can tell how popular these two are here by all the fans that attack them both before Tom Goddard's matches!"

Schiavone: "Yes, I haven't seen so many people attack a wrestler prior to their match since Goldberg's rise to fame, RD!"

Tom Goddard v. Paul London

Okay, it's official. I thought Tom Goddard deserved his press, really I did. I bought into all the AJ Styles comparisons, all the "Jerry Lynn with charisma" claims, even thought that the claims he's the "indy Shawn Michaels" were justified. However, on this night, it became official: Tom Goddard is nothing more than the American Teddy Hart- no more, no less. I say that because this match, like his match with Shannon Moore, was an exercise in no-selling and making the WWE opponent look like a second-rater. It's a shame, because Paul London's one of those wrestlers who you know could go with Goddard in a fair matchup. Goddard got the win here, which proved my claim in a way: I can see now why AWAMLW doesn't push him more and why NWATNA or WWE hasn't called yet. If these last few matches are any proof, he'd cause more headaches than ****+ matches.

(50, 79, 64)

Chuck Palumbo v. Tito Ortiz

I don't know what it is about whacked Out wrestling, but Chuck Palumbo always manages to wrestle his best stuff when he's helping wOw out. Granted, for Palumbo, that "best" is "par for the course", but still- it's better than what he does in WWE... The match had its problems, mostly in a case where Palumbo seemed to be fighting to keep Tito Ortiz from apparently shooting on him. However, a few choice Jungle Kicks (each stiffer-looking than the last, climaxing with one that appeared like Palumbo was trying to kick Ortiz's head off) stopped that, as Palumbo was able to get a win and make it into the finals...

(68, 73, 70)

Meanwhile, in back, I was ecstatic. I was smart enough to know that I could probably out-shoot Storm, but I could never stand with Tito Ortiz in a shootfight, and that Palumbo was all-too-willing to job if needed...I decided to continue watching to see the rest of this and continue to psych myself up.

Danny Doring v. Jeff Hardy

Okay...maybe it was having stuff taken out of them from the first match, but this was not a good match at all. Neither of the two was as "on" as they were in their first matches (and considering Hardy's, that's saying something.) The two tried to go too soft on each other, almost to save energy for the finals. The only time when I was actually interested in the match was when Detective Chris Hamrick came down to the ring and made some motions towards Doring. However, Jeff Hardy was there to wave Hamrick back to the dressing room. Doring did the honorable thing and stepped back until Hardy could get ready...only for another guy in detective outfits (who I recognized as former XPW star Homeless Jimmy) to proceed to attack Doring and leave the ring before Hardy could turn around! Not seeing what went on, Jeff Hardy pinned Doring, going on to the finals!

(54, 67, 60)

After the match, Danny Doring was livid. Detective Chris Hamrick took a mic...

Hamrick: "I deduce you're angry about my little plan...well, let me introduce you to my new sidekick in this attack: SHERLOCK HOMELESS! Tell these people what it is, Sherlock!"

Homeless: "Um...uh...SPARE SOME CHANGE SO I CAN GO GET LOADED?" (Re-Release Notes: Well, at least I won't be the only wOw booker going to hell for wOw Memorial gimmicks- this was the baby of my top assistant...)

Jamie Kogyaru v. Sharon Goddard (National Women's Title)

Before the match, Goddard took the mic...

Sharon Goddard: "You know, I think you're going to need some more humiliation, so how about we make this a Bra and Panties matchup?" The crowd had a mix of half-cheering (apparently for Kogyaru), and half-booing (apparently for Goddard.) As for the match, this was a premiere example of telling stuff. The announcers remarked that Sharon Goddard is undefeated in Bra and Panties matches (a good thing- no man with the gift of sight wants to see Sharon Goddard in her skivvies), and the match was a pretty boring one to boot. Neither one put much of their actual ability in the show, going from what could have been a decent match into a WWE-style comedy bout. My eyes thanked every deity it could, as Sharon Goddard ripped Kogyaru's clothes off to get the win and the title. I'm not sure whether that's a bad thing or a good thing...

(45, 58, 51)

(Time: 9:30 [CST]: Minneapolis, MN)

Meanwhile, at the AWAMLW Underground taping, Jason Knight and Joey Styles were calling some action...

Joey Styles: "Fans, I've just received word of a big title change, folks: We have a new National Women's Champion- Sharon Goddard just beat Jamie Kogyaru to win the title at one of the federations that recognizes the belt as a valid championship!"

Jason Knight: "You're right- this Saturday, I'm sure Jamie Kogyaru will be there to try and get revenge for this..."

(Time: 10:30 [EST]: Kingston, RI)

This is it, the moment of truth. As I left, I passed my sister as she carried her new title.

Sharon Goddard: "This is it, Tommy...Go get your birthright."

"I'll try...I'm not going to let you be the only one coming home with gold..."

Sharon: "That's the spirit...don't let this bother you. You can do this." I looked out there, with two top wrestlers in the ring, at least one of which planned to shoot his way to the title, and thought...

"I hope you're right..." Suddenly, the opening strains of "Carmelina" hit outside there. Jocelyn turned to me before the match...

Jocelyn: "Are you ready for this, Tom?"

"I've been waiting 17 years for this moment- of course I am..." Jon Ian announced it in the ring... "And the third competitor in the match, weighing in at 175 lbs. from Providence, Rhode Island, being accompanied to the ring by Jocelyn Richter, Tom Goddard!" The crowd cheered as I headed into the ring and waited for the matchup to start...

Jeff Hardy v. Devon Storm v. Tom Goddard v. Chuck Palumbo (For the wOw World Championship)

We started the match out in a typical clusterfuck. Devon Storm made a beeline for me, while Chuck Palumbo attacked Jeff Hardy. Me and Devon brawled a bit, until order came to the ring as I got out and forced Devon into starting with Jeff. The two put on a halfway decent high-flying match...well, until Storm began to attempt to start using a large amount of submission holds on Hardy. Jeff Hardy made a quick tag to Chuck Palumbo, only to have Storm ease up a bit on that form of attack. I guess he is trying to shoot after all. Quick tags followed between all four competitors in this. I went in a couple times, made a nice move or two, then tagged out. Finally, it stabilized again with Storm and Hardy. This time, Jeff Hardy wasn't able to get to a tag as Devon Storm locked a stiff-looking armbar on Hardy, causing him to tap out...

Seeing Hardy go out was a signal, as I jumped into the match. I tried to use some high-flying moves on Storm, which he began to follow with. Suddenly, he jumped into a different form, beginning to brawl with me. Storm used closed fists, then began using a couple rakes to my face. I kept fighting...until I felt liquid running down my forehead. I felt my head and saw: He was making me do a bladejob, and from the looks of things, it was fairly high on the Flair-scale, so to speak. I looked at Devon Storm, as he made an "evil-looking" pose... exposing the thumbtacks on his fingertips...

Storm: "Do the job kid...let that pretty gold belt go to me, so it can go around Triple H's waist where it belongs..."

I was still feeling a little angry...I don't like to blade- now I've got those ugly blademarks on me... I had to make a quick tag to Chuck Palumbo, letting the WWE guys go at it...

"Chuck...he's got tacks...be warned..."

Palumbo: "Don't worry...he's not using them against WWE guys..." I saw Chuck and Devon go at it with nice moves...

Storm: "I knew you were a indy sympathizer...right now, you're the same as one of those wOwfed punks!" I saw Devon go after Chuck with some intensely stiff moves...

Palumbo: "Sorry, Devon- I can't do stuff like this to Robbie and them..." Chuck then fought back with some nice power moves, looking stiffer than usual. He proceeded to attack Devon Storm with some nice maneuvers as I mentally cursed myself for thinking the Billy and Chuck tag team was a poor idea. However, this joy was short-lived, as Devon started punching Chuck a few times, then set him up for a Mindbender. I cursed this luck a bit...only to stop, as Chuck hit a few punches on Devon, then hit the Chuck Deluxe on him! I was mentally cheering as Palumbo grabbed Storm's legs and hit a Banzai Drop-style move on him, keeping Storm's elbow's down as he got a three count! I quickly jumped into the ring to hear Chuck give me some encouragement...

Palumbo: "You're all clear, kid! Now let's get you your birthright!"

"Only if the match can be good..." The two of us began putting on a nice array of different moves. I made sure to sell his power moves like they were taking the thread of my being, while he made my high-flying look dazzling and painful. Eventually, the referee gave us the signal. Chuck went to give me a Jungle Kick, but I grabbed his leg and reversed it into a Dragon Screw. I heard RD and Tony selling this...

Tony: "A NICE SIDEWALK SLAM BY SIDEWALK SLAM!"

RD: "These two wrestlers are pulling out all the stops for this title!" Just then, Palumbo hit me with a kick to the midsection. He headed up to the top rope (don't ask me, I'm as surprised as you...) Just as he went for an elbow drop, Jocelyn was right there to hit the ropes, sending him down onto the ropes. I crawled up and headed up to the top rope with him...

"You sure you can do this?"

Chuck: "Go for it..." I signalled to the crowd, then proceeded to send Chuck straight to My Final Heaven (doing kayfabed lines in my head? WTF?) as the announcers were selling it...

Tony: "THAT'S HIS MOVE, RD!"

RD: "Tom Goddard hits the My Final Heaven on Chuck Palumbo! I'm surprised he could manage to hit it!" I covered him, as I heard the referee's hand hit the canvas, my mind kept racing...

"1..." All of a sudden, I was back in the Richters' yard playing on their trampoline...

"And Tommy 'Hulk' Goddard is getting ready for it...he hits the legdrop on 'Macho Girl' Jocelyn Richter...it's over! The winner, and new whacked Out wrestling Heavyweight Champion, Tommy 'Hulk' Goddard!"

"Okay...now it's my turn to win, Tom..."

"2..."

Joey Styles: "Daniels is close...he's reaching the title...WE HAVE A NEW AWA CHAMPION, and MLW recieves the weekly Pay-Per-Views and the title of the American Wrestling Association!" I saw Daniels celebrate with Court H. Bauer and the AWA Title...

Jason Knight: "And you just know that there are some heartbroken people in Rhode Island tonight..."

"3...!" I heard the bell ring as the crowd went BALLISTIC! I could barely hear the announcers from the ring...

Tony Schiavone: "Tom Goddard has done it! We have a new whacked Out wrestling World Heavyweight Champion!"

RD Reynolds: "The lifelong dream of Tom Goddard has finally come true, as Goddard can hold up the whacked Out wrestling World Championship!" Meanwhile, in the ring, I could finally begin to make out Chuck's words...

Chuck: "Congratulations, kid...make that strap proud." Just then, Jocelyn ran into the ring as we celebrated. Just then, Robbie came out to the ring...

RD Reynolds: "And here's Robbie Richter to present the title to our new Champion...but where's the belt?" Just then, I saw Robbie take a microphone...

Robbie: "wOw fans, I came out here to present the whacked Out wrestling World Title to our new champions. May I be the first to say: I can't help but feel proud right now. My youngest daughter, the manager of a World Champion. Tom Goddard, someone who's been like a son to me for years, representing wOw as our official title holder. I thought of these things, and I really wanted to present you myself with the wOw World Title...but then, I heard that there's two other people who really wanted to present you with the belt just as much..." Just then, I heard "Same Old Song" hit as Shane and Brad came out brandishing the wOw championship to our complete shock!

RD Reynolds: "Wait a minute...that's Shane Goddard and Bradley Richter! I...I know they're the siblings of these two, but...but they were just on tonight's live Raw!" Shane took the belt and handed it to me as tears just started flowing...

Shane: "Hey, come on- World Champions shouldn't be crying..." I clutched the title and held it close as the crowd kept cheering.

RD Reynolds: "It's official, whacked Out wrestling fans: The Future is Now here in whacked Out wrestling!" The crowd cheered as I walked back to the dressing room, basking in their cheers as long as possible before I had to immediately go in for a quick change: According to what was planned, I had to go into Heel mode as soon as possible for a AWAMLW promo from here...

(65, 75, 70)

(Time: 10:15 p.m [CST], Minneapolis, MN.)

Meanwhile, Court H. Bauer took the mic...

Bauer: "Ladies and gentlemen, tonight is a great night for the American Wrestling Association! As you've seen, last night we took out the free radicals in AWAMLW, by finally ridding our federation of those punks from Providence who tried to commit Mutiny on me!" Meanwhile, a scattering of fans held up "Death Eaters" signs as Court H. Bauer continued. "And now, let me welcome you to the new era of AWAMLW. Now, you will see a good, more dignified level of hybrid wrestling..." Just then, Bauer was cut off by Jason Knight running from the announcers' table into the ring...

Knight: "I'm sorry, Mr.Bauer, but I've just recieved word that the AWA finally has an East Coast Champion crowned!" Bauer's expression dropped... "I've got a live feed from the title change in Kingston, Rhode Island, right now!" Bauer blanched as Robbie Richter came on the AWA Tron...

Richter: "Hello, AWA fans. I am whacked Out wrestling owner and AWA Board of Directors member Robbie Richter, here to announce that it is official: You, the fans of AWAMLW, finally have an East Coast Champion. It is my duty as the head of AWA matters on the East Coast to present the new East Coast Champion: HARRY POTSMOKER!" A scattering of cheers and boos hit as the Death Eaters surrounded Potsmoker.

Potsmoker: "Hello, AWAMLW! So...did you miss me this week? Anyways, me and my fellow Death Eaters here are just celebrating the fact that everyone out there's hero, Harry Potsmoker, has finally fulfilled his destiny and won the big title, the only title that matters, the whacked Out wrestling World Heavyweight Championship! Now, in case you people in Minnesota don't know, that translates to: The BRAND-NEW, AMERICAN WRESTLING ASSOCIATION HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE...East Coast...is...Me! And you all know what Court said last time..." Potsmoker mimicked a stodgy voice... " 'You and your crew only get to keep your jobs if you can win an AWA Title...' and, well, he never said WHICH title I had to win...anyways, me and my buddies here are going to celebrate my win, so, long story short: I'll be there Saturday! Sorry about that, Court, but you're stuck with us!" In the ring, Court H. Bauer was going into conniptions as he heard the news!

Bauer: "You...you...you little brat! You think you're so smart, don't you? Well, good news: Just because you won that title on a wOw show, that means...guess what? The AWAMLW does not have to recognize it! Mr. Richter, I will expect you to show up on Saturday to present us with the AWAMLW East Coast championship, so we may find a righteous, AWA titleholder for it!"

Richter: "Okay...I will be there Saturday, sir..."

(Overall: 64)

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

TNA XPlosion

Your hosts are Dave Meltzer and Jocelyn Richter.

CarWreck v. Adam Windsor

And Xplosion starts out with overrated wrestlers: Team Britain's Adam Windsor and Raven's bitchboy CarWreck. To start off, there were some pros for this match: Namely, the two led to a hot opener [well, hot by opener standards...]. On the other hand, the workrate isn't what I'd expect from two X-Division wrestlers. Maybe they didn't click, or maybe they just are, well, overrated, but either way, this match was subpar for the division. CarWreck hit his Cascading Entropy for the victory, getting some pluses to it. Memo to TNA: Just bite the bullet, sign Joey Hamm away from AWAMLW, and allow these two to actually put on a show together.

(42, 77, 59)

After the break, Robert Lowenstein brought Team America2 out to challenge Team Canada for the America's X-Cup in a two-match challenge.

Challenge match 1: The Hart Foundation 2k3 [Teddy Hart/Jack Evans] (Canada) v. Team America2 (America2)

Team America2's tag team in this will be Danny Hillstead and Jay Matthews, two wrestlers who've made their name in whacked Out wrestling. The two weren't really a respectable tag team before, and it showed here...to the tune of them really having a poor match. What is it with wOw people always failing in other federations? These matches, the problems in AWAMLW, now this...At the very least, the Hart Foundation 2K3 managed to come through with the goods here, and they salvaged this match to watchable levels. This was necessary: it's just basic math. There's like 25 people who'd be better prospects than Hillstead and Matthews, so they needed to expect the Hart Foundation 2k3 to be on luggage duty for this match. Naturally, Teddy Hart got the victory- a good thing; Team America2 apparently needs time to gestate.

(35, 78, 56)

Challenge Match 2: Petey Williams (Canada) v. Steve Evans (America2)

And, since Team Canada was so willing to carry his teammates, here's Steve Evans to return the favor on Petey Williams! This match just didn't have it, to tell the truth. Evans was able to put on a show, while Petey Williams was more of a...poor-quality wrestler. (That's the nicer way to say he blew choad.) To be fair, Evans tried his best to pull it off, but this wasn't happening. At least TNA was fair about it, having Williams CHEAT TO WIN~!- keeping Evans looking good while having Williams get the victory. Nothing worth seeing here...

(32, 73, 52)

After the match, Scott D'Amore and Robert Lowenstein shook hands as Team Canada took the America's X-Cup back.

Meltzer: "Well, at least Team Canada's keeping the America's X-Cup..."

Richter: "I don't know...I wouldn't keep this Team America2 out of it. I know these guys have some serious skill, and could definitely be a threat in the future..."

Meltzer: "Yeah...I KNOW how you know them, all right..."

Richter: "What are you implying, here? I'm a good girl!"

Meltzer: "I was just saying you're good friends with most of Team America2 outside the ring...why? Do you have a guilty conscience?"

Richter: "Look, just because netsmarks like you can never get a girl doesn't mean you have to make rumors about any female who'll give you the time of day..." (Re-Release Notes: I don't know how it got this way, but I'm really liking how well Meltzer and Richter are playing off of each other on XPlosion- it's one of the few shows in which I personally look forward to writing the announcers as much as the in-ring stuff.)

Meanwhile, in the ring, D'Amore was continuing his celebration.

D'Amore: "Thank you! As you see, my Team Canada has retained our Cup! We are taking offers for the next group to make a challenge to us...and it will occur in 2 weeks, at the Super-X Tournament: Winning wrestler's team gets the Cup!"

Richter: "Now, that's a prize for winning!"

Meltzer: "I know- people have to be excited about that!"

Don Harris v. John Walters

Meltzer: "This is a good matchup...John Walters has been making a name for himself in Ring of Honor recently..."

Richter: "I've seen some of his stuff- he's good, but can he go up against Don Harris?"

Match: Okay, this is bad: When DON HARRIS is able to put on a match comparable to an X-Division match on the same show, that's a good sign there's trouble. To be fair, John Walters was made to look like a million bucks here, as Harris made the newcomer look very good in this matchup. Harris was a HOSS AFIRE~!, though, taking his revenge on Walters. Just as he went for a Big Foot, Goldylocks came out through the crowd and distracted Don Harris, allowing Walters to hit him with a big dropkick from behind, then lock a Sharpshooter on Harris for the victory.

Richter: "A huge upset for John Walters in his debut match here in NWATNA!"

Meltzer: "Well, at least they're giving the right person the victory: Don Harris matches are not fit for children and other living things..."

(27, 72, 49)

Super-X Qualifying Match: Team Mexico Representative (Oscar Sevilla v. Oz v. Pegasso v. Scoria)

Meltzer: "This is the first part of this big Super-X Tournament qualifier, as the members of Team Mexico will be going at it for a shot."

Richter: "With the announcement the America's X-Cup will be on the line, you know every one of them would like to take the advantage of being solely responsible for taking the cup home to their country!"

Match: Well, luchadores are always blue-chip: Good match, poor crowd reaction. This was an example of this in spades, as the four members of Team Mexico were able to put on the match of the night so far- which the crowd was dead for. Maybe Vince Russo was right- luchadores can't draw in the US...Anyways, the match was pretty obvious: was first eliminated, then Pegasso, finally peaking when Scoria pulled off an upset on leader Oscar Sevilla to be the representative for Team Mexico in the tournament! After the match, the other people in the match congratulated Scoria as they raised each others' hands.

(26, 81, 53)

Qualifying Match: Team USA (Chris Sabin v. Jason Cross v. The Amazing Red v. Jerry Lynn)

Well, this time the people were into the match again, finally...the wrestlers were also into it, managing to put on a great show (good match? On this XPlosion? Surprising...) It was a pretty good show of the best of the US that they could get in the X-Division (although, that minor "We Want AJ" chant was showing up again...) The Amazing Red was the first to be knocked out of the match, quickly followed by Jerry Lynn (apparently, they're interested in putting over new guys here.) Sabin and Cross continued to put on a good show, finally peaking with Jason Cross hitting a Crossfire on Sabin to get the win and the tourney spot. That's not a bad thing- everyone in TNA knows Lynn and Red's greatness, and Sabin's the X-Champ: Jason Cross needed a big win like that to put himself on par (in fans' view) with the big boys.

(56, 84, 70)

After the match, Team USA was starting to celebrate together, until the TNATron hit...

(INT. A dark room. "Goody Two Shoes" is playing in the background. The back view of a somewhat slender figure in mostly leather is seen.)

"For too long, NWATNA has been in chaos.

There are no such thing as nations: USA, Canada, Mexico, England, Japan, Australia, Europe: Is there even some difference?

For me, none of this matters. The X-Division may have representatives from these countries, but you have none for anyone who comes from other places.

Well, rest assured: At the Super-X Tournament, I will be there to represent all those watching us...from the Planet Glitter..."

The screen went to black.

"HE IS COMING...

TNA...prepare for the X-Division to get a little more glamorous..."

After the vignette ended, Team USA was confused as the announcers tried to sell it...

Meltzer: "Apparently, the Super-X Tournament may have an unwelcome guest in it..."

Richter: "Well, if he looks that good from the back, I'd be happy to welcome him into some other places..."

Meltzer: "Will you stop?"

Richter: "Aww....is someone jealous?"

(76)

Balls Mahoney v. Jonny Storm

It's official: Dave Meltzer has sold his soul...anyone who can consider this to be a "good matchup", knowing the style clash that was coming on, had to be on some sort of deal. The crowd was into it, but mostly because a match like this just tells people that Storm's going over, and TNA must have plans for him. Luckily, they did, as Jonny Storm got the Rewind on Mahoney to get the big victory. It wasn't too horrible, as style clashes go...

(42, 75, 58)

After the break, another vignette aired...

"For too long, TNA has thought it has been saved.

However, it is my finding that NWATNA has fallen back into its wicked ways.

One man...one great man, had tried to save them, but they would not have it, and he left to tend to new flocks in Minnesota.

But now...his work will be saved.

For this is the gospel...according to Altar Boy Luke...

ALTAR BOY LUKE

Coming Soon..."

(45)

After that match, The Sandman came out to the ring to some applause.

Meltzer: "These crowds still love The Sandman- he is the spirit of the late ECW personified!"

Richter: "Oh, come on, Dave...ECW's dead and gone...let it rest, and let some of the newer feds come up and take its place in people's hearts!"

Meltzer: "Oh, really? And what federation do YOU think should take that role?"

Richter: "Um...uh...NWATNA?"

Meltzer: "You win this round..."

The Sandman v. BG James

When people who haven't mattered since 2000 Collide! This matchup was one of those which was almost perfect: Both poor wrestlers, both only get work on their name and their charisma...it was an easy decision. 3 Live Kru stayed out of the match,as the two tried to put on a wrestling match (failing miserably.) Eventually, The Sandman tried to attack with a Singapore Cane. However, James managed to grab the Singapore Cane from The Sandman and crack him over the head with it! BG James then went for a Shake,Rattle, and Roll on The Sandman- only instead of a punch after the dance, went with a Slap on him, giving him the big victory. After the match, BG James took the mic...

"This should teach all of you! I'm going straight to the top of TNA! I'M BG JAMES, BITCH!"

(66, 80, 73)

Raven v. Jeff Jarrett

This is a non-title matchup...meaning in Booking Theory, Raven would get to go over. The two were able to put on a good show- pretty obvious, seeing as they're the only two regular main eventers in NWATNA, so they're bound to get chances together. The match was actually a decent brawl, as both wrestlers proved they've still got it. Raven kept the attack going, and hit the Evenflow DDT on Jarrett. However, just as Raven was going to get the pin, CM Punk and Julio Dinero came rushing in and attacked Raven! CM Punk hit a Pepsi Plunge on Raven, allowing Jeff Jarrett to get the win! After the match, Jarrett and Punk shook hands as Raven took the mic...

Jarrett: "Raven...you like the title I wear? Well, good news...at least for me: You're not getting another shot at this belt without going through my main men CM Punk and Julio Dinero here!"

CM Punk: "That'll be tough for him: I mean, he's not money like my boy Julio, he's not the Chosen One like you are, and he's definitely not Straight Edge...how can he compare?" The three celebrated as XPlosion went off the air.

(84, 85, 84)

Over: 63

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

I headed to that Friday's Flagship tapings still on a high. Somehow, it just feels different if you're going into a show as that promotion's World Champion.

Hold up a second: I'm whacked Out wrestling's World Champion...

I'M whacked Out wrestling's World Champion...

Sorry about that: I'm still new at being "the man" in a promotion, and it just sounds so cool to say it like this... I headed through and did the normal things. Somehow, I had to go about my daily business for this, and just let the show head on as normal...

wOw Flagship

The wOw Detective Agency (Detective Chris Hamrick/Sherlock Homeless) v. Doring and Roadkill

Before the match, the wOw Detective Agency took the mic...

Detective Hamrick: "Now, before this match starts, I felt that I should regale you all with some of the many things that our research has taken about Mr. Danny Doring! Sherlock, what have you found?"

Sherlock Homeless: "Um...uh...SPARE SOME CHANGE SO I CAN GO GET LOADED?"

Hamrick: "There'll be time for that later, Sherlock...the first thing we have found: It seems while these two studied in ECW, they were led to the ring by a woman who shall remain nameless..." Detective Hamrick showed a picture of former ECW valet Elektra on the wOwTron. "Now, my deductive skills have looked at this female. Note the appearance in all places. It is not that hard to see: This person who Mr. Doring and Mr....Roadkill had as a valet is a MAN, BAY-BEE!"

Sherlock Homeless: "SPARE SOME CHANGE SO I CAN GO GET LOADED?"

Hamrick: "After the match, Sherlock..." Just then, Doring and Roadkill headed down the ramp to attack their rivals! Okay, this should be...interesting, to say the least...I mean, we all know Doring and Roadkill bring the goods, but Hamrick and Homeless haven't really teamed up before (and Sherlock Homeless is a sub-par wrestler, to boot...) The match basically showed this weakness, as the two teams didn't really mesh that well for it. The match also had the wrong team go over, as Sherlock Homeless cracked a bottle of Mad Dog 20-20 over Roadkill's head, allowing Detective Chris Hamrick to hit the Case Closed on Danny Doring for the victory! After the match, the detectives celebrated, until Doring and Roadkill attacked again, hitting a Buggy Bang on Detective Hamrick after the match!

(53)

The Power Company v. Los Barrio Boys

The Power Company are Dave and Dean Powers, another of the many New England tag teams who wOw's bringing in (apparently to job out to homegrown people.) However, since Los Barrio Boys aren't homegrown, all bets are off here. The two teams actually managed to work fairly well together despite the fact that they were completely different styles. Los Barrio Boys put on a nice show with their high-flying, while The Power Company attacked with nice well...power moves. Suddenly, a woman ran into the ring and clocked Billy Boy Barrio with a chair, allowing Dave Powers to get a Powerslam on him for the win! After the match, the woman came in the ring and took a mic...

Woman: "Hello, whacked Out wrestling. Tonight, you...lesser beings... have seen the power of my skill. My name is Veronica Diamond, and I am here to show my own personal study. You see, I am better than each and every one of you lesser people, and because of this, I can take any people, no matter how...unspectacular they are, and lead them to glory in wOw! I figure...you two...whoever you are...are perfect for this role...will you join me and see success that you could never dream of?"

Dave and Dean Powers looked at each other...then shook Veronica Diamond's hands!

Diamond: "Perfect...you two shall rise to the top, proving no one can deny the ultimate power of the Diamond Exchange!"

(53)

Butterbean v. Alex Shelley

Oh, dear god, this was horrible... Now, I don't expect Butterbean to put on a good match, seeing as he's nothing more than jobber fodder who's a boxer [and a poor one at that], no more, no less. I am somewhat surprised Alex Shelley couldn't bring him to a good match: I've heard such good things about Shelley that I'd expect him to be good enough to carry someone like Butterbean. Instead, it was pretty sub-par: Butterbean punches Shelley to within an inch of his jobber life. The only problem I had was the finish: After the beating Butterbean dished out, Alex Shelley was able to hit one Springboard Dropkick to Butterbean's navel, sending him down for the count and giving Shelley a massive upset, proving once and for all: YOU TOO can get a surprising push in whacked Out wrestling if you make sure to befriend Tom Goddard and his clique before getting your job!

(34)

After the break, Adam Windsor was in the ring...

Windsor: "I'm sick and tired of being treated like nothing here in whacked Out wrestling! I got mistreated in my first time here, I'm mistreated here now- I'm making an open challenge to anyone in the back who wants to see exactly what I can do!" Just then, the wOwTron had a strange noise come up...

"WELLLLLLLLLL...WELL IT'S THE BIG SHO!" Just then, the Kaientai theme hit as the announcers built this up.

Carter: "Oh no...that is NOT who I think it is!"

Gristleizer: "He's supposed to be with WWE!" However, the theme continued as Funaki headed to the ring doing all of The Big Show's mannerisms...

Carter: "Well, it wasn't who I thought it was..."

Gristleizer: "But he is supposed to be with WWE: I was right, you were wrong! Ha ha!"

The Big Sho Funaki v. Adam Windsor

Okay, this was actually a good matchup. Take away the idea of Funaki mocking one of his co-workers in the WWE, and these two were fairly matched. Unfortunately, the unwritten rules of wrestling follows: 1) If a wrestler has an open challenge, they're losing: 2) If a wrestler's a mystery opponent making a debut, they're winning. Hence, we had Adam Windsor put on his bumping shoes. Funaki hit a Fisherman's Buster, then went for a Chokeslam on Windsor, getting a big victory. Not too bad: I'd like to see more of both of them here...

(50)

Samoa Joe v. Teddy Hart

Carter: "This match apparently comes about from the fact that Samoa Joe was double-booked in Japan for his quarterfinal matchup last week."

Gristleizer: "This could be a big win for Samoa Joe: If he can win this, he could arguably be in line for a wOw World Title shot!"

Why is it that a match that seems like such a styles clash could be so good? These two were actually able to pull it off without any problem in the matchup- a surprising thing, as "good match" and "Teddy Hart" should not be used in the same sentence. Sure, he's talented, but come on: He's Teddy Hart...The two ended up putting on enough of a show so I was interested throughout. Eventually, Samoa Joe got the win in a surpriser: With how wOw's been pushing Hart, I thought he would be more in line for the win. After the match, Samoa Joe took the mic...

Samoa Joe: "This should show you: If I was in the US, I would have deserved to be the wOw champion right now! Tom Goddard- if you have any balls, you'll face me on Monday's Sin for that title!"

Tom Goddard v. Jeff Hardy

And these two go and spoil the good name they gave from their match last week...I thought these two would mesh well together, but the two managed to fail miserably in this matchup. The two's skills, which seemed to go well together, were stiff in this matchup. It was a fairly formulaic matchup: Jeff Hardy attacks first (against how he's good), Goddard fights back, My Final Heaven, Goddard retains his title. Pretty poor, to say the least...

(55)

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

AWA: Major League Wrestling.

Your hosts are Jason Knight and Joey Styles.

Bobby Quance v. Billy Kim

And the AWAMLW tradition starts anew, as we get a good opener: Hot action, dead crowd. These two West Coast stars Quance and Kim were able to put on a really good show, which got the crowd slowly more interested as the match wore on. Quance got the win here following a nice Shooting Star Press, but really: In cases like this, both men can be considered winners; the likely bump to each of them's Q-rating will be more than worth it...

(29, 84, 56)

Mando Guerrero v. Alex Shelley

The AWAMLW started off the match apparently trying to have some of Mando's younger family members' legacy rub off on him by sending him down to the ring in a lowrider. (Yeah, and they WONDER why people think they're "Number 3" at best...) Once in the ring, we got a fairly normal jobber match between the two, as Mando Guerrero attacked Shelley with everything he had possible. The match was pretty sub-par, as Guerrero proved he's seen better days and Shelley proved he's better as a tag team specialist on major scales. Despite the other things to try and get Mando to leech off his family's success, it was Shelley who CHEATED TO WIN~! in this one, using the tights for leverage in a roll up for a surprising victory as the announcers sold it as a huge upset. Not "horrible", but I've seen much better...

(42, 70, 56)

After the match, Alex Shelley was ecstatic, grabbing the mic:

Shelley: "Well, well, well! As long as I'm here, I just wanted to congratulate Mando Guerrero for this great matchup that he's given me. He truly is one of the best luchadores of all time, people!"

Mando Guerrero stayed in the ring:

Mando: "Well, thank you, sir..."

Shelley: "One question, Mando..."

Mando: "Go ahead- anything you wanted to know about wrestling?"

Shelley: "Well...sort of...Mando Guerrero: You're a legend of this sport, so tell me: HOW DOES IT FEEL TO GO TO A NATIONALLY-TELEVISED PAY-PER-VIEW EVENT AND LOSE TO A JOBBER?"

Styles: "What did he just say? That's a wrestling legend he's talking to!"

Knight: "Come on...you won the match: Be gracious in victory as in defeat!"

Mando: "Well...I..."

Shelley: "Come on, POPS, if you can't beat a jobber on Pay-Per-View, what makes you think you can still cut it?" Mando Guerrero thought about it for a second...

Mando: "You know what...I can't. I've apparently reached my physical limits. I would like to take this opportunity to thank all my fans throughout the years, and let the people know that at the end of this month, I will retire from the world of professional wrestling..."

Shelley: "BZZT! Much like your career, Time's up for the speech, old man! The more important thing is the fact that this is the beginning of a new era in wrestling. Randy Orton may be out of wrestling, perhaps permanently, but that just means that that particular legend killer is dead! Long live the era of the New Legend Killer, Alex Shelley!" Shelley continued to attack Mando Guerrero for extra oomph to this attack...

Styles: "This is just wrong! Mando Guerrero's given so many good years to wrestling fans, and Alex Shelley just doesn't care!"

Knight: "That little punk needs to be taught a lesson in respect!"

(56)

(NATIONAL WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP) Sharon Goddard v. Jamie Kogyaru

Knight: "This match comes up because of the shocker that happened last Monday night, folks: For those of you not aware of the news, Sharon Goddard won the National Women's Championship at another federation's show. Due to the rules of the National Women's Championship, the former champion gets an automatic rematch as soon as possible, leading to this match tonight!"

Styles: "CAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHHTTTTTTTTTTTTT!"

Match: Now, this is more like it. From all reports, the match Goddard and Kogyaru had at the wOw show Monday night (nice touch by Jason Knight not mentioning the federation's name, considering the heat that AWAMLW's putting on wOw wrestlers) was abysmal, and this match was actually what I expect from the two. It was a bit of a styles clash to be sure, but the two managed to put on an awesome show like they usually do in these matches. However, when you've wrestled each other as often as Goddard and Kogyaru have in the last few months, that's bound to occur. The match also had a decent ending, as Goddard attacked with a strong LARIATOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! to get the victory again, only to have Kogyaru attack after the matchup. This works well: It keeps the feud going while also solidifying Sharon Goddard as National Women's Champion to the AWAMLW fans.

(55, 78, 66)

Sonjay Dutt v. Chance Beckett (AWA Global Cruiserweight)

WOW...two straight awesome matches by Sonjay Dutt? This should be a sign to AWAMLW: Push this guy to the moon. He's proven he deserves to be on the rise in this promotion, and could definitely use the extra stuff as a potential crossover wrestler. It worked for Christopher Daniels, right...? This match was awesome, as I said: Chance Beckett really took advantage of his shot, making for a show that should elevate both of these two. Beckett hit the Chance Encounter on Sonjay Dutt, getting the big victory to gain the Global Cruiserweight Title. This should either lead to a feud for the belt or grooming Sonjay Dutt to be the next Cruiserweight to cross over to the heavyweight division and the main event potential therein, and I'd be happy either way...

(49, 91, 70)

Steve Corino v. Norman Smiley

Okay: Why is Norman Smiley still in AWAMLW? On the one hand, he'd be a better fit in the character-obsessed WWE than the hybrid-obsessed AWA. All he's worth in this federation is spot jobbing to people they want to push higher. This isn't a bad thing; they need some job guys, but still: Why just keep him on roster with that? Anyway, the jobbing streak continued, as Steve Corino got the win. Not a horrific matchup, but not up to eithers' usual quality.

(67, 70, 68)

(Global Tag Team) Who: Betta Than Kanyon v. Naturally Marvelous

I thought tag team matches weren't supposed to be style clashes...this was actually the worst of all of the tag styles clashes I've seen. Who didn't mesh with Kanyon, Mike Sullivan didn't mesh with Scoot Andrews, and the teams didn't mesh with each other. As a result, you have a match of "sort of decent" quality instead of the really good tag team matches I'm used to. The champions retained, with Kanyon beating Andrews with a Flatliner to get the victory. Pretty sub-par as tag team matches go. Sadly, they needed some serious help here, as too many good tag team matches eventually will spoil someone for them.

(55, 77, 66)

Christopher Daniels v. Jeff Hardy (AWA World)

Okay: After all the good matches Jeff Hardy's had in the AWA, I think it's safe to say: The reports of Jeff Hardy's professional death have been greatly exaggerated. Hardy's been nothing short of phenomenal in AWAMLW; everything he was supposed to be throughout his career here. When paired with Daniels tonight, the match was a MOTY candidate easily. Daniels made it look like Hardy had a chance during the whole of the match, and Hardy looked like he'd be a good AWA Champ. Jeff Hardy was close to getting the win, but just before he could pull it off, Jerry Lynn ran in and attacked Christopher Daniels, causing Daniels the victory by DQ! After the match, Hardy looked slightly angry, but helped Lynn attack Daniels. Not a bad match: These three work well as a main factor in the AWA title division.

(79, 95, 87)

After the match, Court H. Bauer came out to the ring and took a microphone...

Bauer: "Tonight is a glorious day for the unity of the American Wrestling Association. I would like to introduce to the AWAMLW's fans, the head of the AWA's affairs on the East Coast: AWAMLW Board of Directors member Robbie Richter!" Richter came out to the ring looking somewhat somber.

Knight: "Wait...where's the East Coast Title?"

Bauer: "Mr.Richter...please sign off on vacating your federation's title, so that the AWA can have an East Coast champion it can be proud of." Richter took a mic...

Richter: "Mr.Bauer, I have been thinking about your claims for the past 5 days, hemming and hawing and doing everything possible for this. I know of your reasons why I should strip Harry Potsmoker of the AWA East Coast Title..." The crowd booed at this...

Knight: "He has to do it- Potsmoker doesn't work for us anymore..."

Richter: "...but then, I think of the real things that matter here. I've always tried to stay out of your business on your side of the Mississippi, and for the most part, the AWA has stayed out of my business on my side. However, in this case, I cannot sit idly by. Tom Goddard- Harry Potsmoker- is one of those rare talents who I only see once in a decade, if that. Go down to the New England area, and you only see a talent like him once in a lifetime. The matches he gives in for me usually tend to be top-quality, and in addition to this, the Rhode Island fans think he's the most indispensable wrestler in the company. When we give training for future stars, he's right there to help out any new guy we have...save for possibly showing them up, since he's usually the first in and last out of that training center. To put it simply, he's the total package that I've been dreaming of one day having in my promotion since the day I opened it. On that alone, he's the most worthy person of holding the wOw World Heavyweight Title- the AWA East Coast title. Even without these, this is a person who I've known personally for virtually his entire life. He's spent so much time with my family over the years that when I see him in that ring, it's almost like I'm watching my own son wrestle out there. Through all of this time, I've known his love of this business, and also known that the only thing that he's ever wanted was simple: He wanted to eventually be at a level where he could be the wOw World Heavyweight Champion- the AWA East Coast Champion: To be at the level his brother was before him, to be the one who was the standard-bearer in whacked Out wrestling. Harry Potsmoker has literally worked his entire life for this moment, and for me to go up to him and say 'I'm sorry- I know that holding this belt is your lifelong dream, but you can't have it because some guy in Minnesota thinks you aren't good enough for us'... for that to happen would break his heart. I cannot do that to him, or to the great fans of whacked Out wrestling. Therefore, it is my duty to respectfully decline your request." A scattering of cheers went up as Bauer got angry.

Bauer: "Oh, yes: Really good. Don't you remember the Super-8? I RUN your federation, Richter. You're lucky I allowed your place to even exist after you lost then instead of closing up shop and running AWAMLW shows there! You are going to strip Harry Potsmoker of that AWA East Coast Title, or you will not be able to fathom the consequences!"

Richter: "Oh, really? You know, I've dealt with your little claims for too long, but now you basically tell me who I can and can not push as my champion? I'll tell you what, Bauer: If you want that title off him so much, all you'll have to do is come to Rhode Island and take it from him. Of course, I wouldn't be...responsible...if you have to go through every wrestler in whacked Out wrestling...hell, every wrestling fan in the state of Rhode Island first!"

Bauer: "I see that as a threat! You're out of line, Richter! If you plan to spend your time defending them, I have no choice but to consider you a part of the Mutiny! One last chance, Richter: Either you're WITH ME, or you're AGAINST ME! And to be fair: You DON'T want to see the consequences if you're against me..."

Richter looked around, then finally looked Bauer dead in the eye...

Richter: "...Then I'm with my workers."

Bauer: "Then you're against me! I'll see your resignation from the AWA Board of Directors on the desk immediately after this show."

Richter: "Okay, if that's how it is. The only problem: I know what you're trying to say, but according to my contract: the second that I resign from the AWA Board of Directors is the second that you've just severed your ties to wOw...!"

Bauer: "Of course not...you will resign from wOw, and I will be happy to have one of my subordinates take control of it from you..."

Richter: "So, you're saying you want to wrest control of my family business away from me? I'm sorry, but in my view, that's a declaration of war!"

Bauer: "If you think that, then so it is..."

Richter: "Fine. If that's how you're playing, then whacked Out wrestling declares war on the American Wrestling Association. Oh, by the way, 'Court'...any good war needs a general..." Just then, Harry Potsmoker clocked Court H. Bauer from behind with the wOw World Title, then locked the Final Fantasy in on him!

Richter: "...And I don't know of anyone I'd rather have take that role than this guy!" Harry Potsmoker finally dropped Bauer as Robbie Richter raised his hand in the ring as AWA: Major League Wrestling went off the air!

(86)

Overall: 71

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

The next night, I was left looking for stuff to do. I had found that when I knew I wasn't scheduled for any wOw shows, it was easier to just spend my weekends in Minneapolis for the two AWAMLW shows. Luckily as I was waiting, I was given a message...

Shelley: "(Hey, me and some of the guys are going to the club- they're going to be showing the first of TNA's new Sunday PPVs. You in?)"Awww...but I wanted to watch The Simpsons...eh, It'll be...worthwhile, at the very least to see it...

"(Sure..." Suddenly, I felt myself freeze up as a screen started loading...

[PARTY CHOSEN FOR YOU: Goddard (level 15) /Steele (level 12)/Shelley (level 7)/Nevada(level 5)/Ms.Hardy (level 10)] (Here's where I started to try something new in an attempt for my out-of-ring fights: As you probably noticed, I suck at booking matches. I decided to use my love of RPGs to use a different style for the out-of-ring matches to try and help solidify them as not "in-ring" (plus it allows me to play with a lot of cooler stuff than most.)

I wondered how that girl who hung out with Jared could be so high in level already as I met the others at the club we were supposed to go...

"Ah, Hotel BCW...I have such fond memories of it..."

Shelley: "(Why...?)"

Steele: "(Long story short- we had him go here for his 21st before an AWA show, we all got hella drunk, he hooked up with one of the AWAMLW dancers- you know Lori, right?)"

Shelley: "(Whoa...how come the person angsting over one girl gets all these people? Shouldn't he be trying to be with that Jocelyn girl or something?)"

"(You know...it's like in some video games: If you don't keep good relations with everyone, not just the one you're actually interested in, they won't fight as well together. Simple way to keep the backstage really happy...)" (I may not be "actively" using Tokimeki Memorial as the basis for this diary anymore, but its effect still lingers on the diary, and probably will. As long as I have a preference for bishoujo anime over giant robots, this will be a heavy part of wOw Memorial and any later versions for this series...

Also from this, it also works well towards this: For some reason, this is around the time when I started to realize more of the general fun stuff I could do with Alex Shelley: Psychic Smark-Fave- it caused him to get pushed much further than I originally planned in the diary...psychics are fun...)

Shelley: "(And THAT'S how you expect to keep the girls in back happy?)"

"(Well, come on: If you have a better way to do it, I'd like to hear it...)"

Shelley: "(I think yours is the cooler one...)"

"(Okay.)" The five gathered up as Ms.Hardy talked...

Hardy: "Vance, Jared: Are you two sure this is safe? I mean, the Redemption Crew's stronger in this area than they'd be in Rhode Island..."

Jared: "Don't worry: If anything happens (which I doubt), you guys will help kick their ass, right?"

"Sure...beats doing other stuff..." The five of us headed to the bar and ordered our choice of beverage that I couldn't really say (Come on, it is on a site where kids will read...) and began to watch the PPV...

TOTAL NONSTOP ACTION: Sunday

Hosts are Mike Tenay and Don West.

Jack Evans v. John Walters

Now, this is a match that's somewhat decent for an opener. Team Canada's Evans hasn't had as many chances to show his skill as a singles competitor, and needed a good showing here against the newcomer Walters. This occurred well enough, and I could see Evans as a future mover and shaker in the X-Division. The two kept going on a mostly back-and-forth matchup. John Walters got Evans where he wanted him, and tried to lock the Sharpshooter in...until Don Harris came down the ramp and attacked Walters, causing the DQ! Apparently, they plan to be using John Walters as a possible crossover wrestler, which could be a good thing: His technical style doesn't work as well with the high flyers of the X-Division as much as the regular heavyweights in TNA.

(36, 81, 58)

In the ring, Erik Watts was playing to the fans. Just then, Altar Boy Luke came down the ramp...

Altar Boy Luke: "Oh, testify, TNA fans! At long last, someone has come to save you from the pains of bad wrestling! My first example, Mr. Erik Watts. You people have been suckered in by his false sense of wrestling, but I am here to show that his skill is an abomination of the Lord's art of professional wrestling! Tonight, I will make him my first victim on the way to making a more noble NWA: Total Nonstop Wrestling, for THAT is the Gospel according to Altar Boy Luke!"

Erik Watts v. Altar Boy Luke

Well, big words can be nice (even if it's such a blatant ripoff of Christopher Daniels that it's not even funny) (I SWEAR that it was my intention from the moment Altar Boy Luke was promoted from the TNA development portion of this to make him a complete ripoff of Christopher Daniels...it's a character style, I swear! "Yeah, yeah..." It IS! "Sure it is..." Why did I have to pick all the mean assistants?), but it's the in-ring stuff that doesn't work. A match like this makes me wonder if the rumors Altar Boy Luke's on TNA are because he claimed he was too good for their development territory in NWA-Wildside are really true. Maybe this was Watts's fault, but if Altar Boy Luke's supposed to be a new incoming star, he really should be able to do better than this. Altar Boy Luke got the victory, which is an obvious conclusion: He's the one they're trying to push actively, Watts isn't: Do the math. Poor matchup all-around, and I'd like to see if Luke could do well against someone his own style.

(55, 66, 60)

After that match's break, a set showed up as Johnny Fairplay was in the ring.

Fairplay: "Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another segment of 'Playin' Fair With Johnny!' I am your host, Johnny Fairplay. Tonight, we've got a special guest: An old friend of mine, 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper!" Piper came to the ring to a large amount of cheers and took a seat next to Fairplay.

Piper: "It's nice to be here, Johnny..."

Fairplay: "Now, I know a lot of the fans at home might not know, but we go back a little ways, am I right?"

Piper: "That's correct- Johnny here used to be one of my assistants..."

Fairplay: "Of course, Mr. Piper. Now, I had to ask you: How do you feel knowing how I've gotten such success. I'm a huge TV star, I've got my own show here on TNA television...hell, I'd even say I'm more world-renowned than you are!"

Piper: "Now, hold on just a minute, kid: You're just some reality TV star! I am a world-famous wrestler, a world-famous movie star..."

Fairplay: "Yeah, yeah...you've been in so many blockbusters...oh, wait, they've all just PREMIERED at Blockbuster...my mistake..."

Piper: "Aren't your 15 minutes up YET?"

Fairplay: "Not likely. I'm taking NWATNA to the top, and then the world will see how Johnny Fairplay is much more than a reality TV star!"

Piper: "Oh, sure: You get your ass beaten by everyone in TNA: You and what army?"

Fairplay: "This one..." Just then, what appeared to be an army of Tough Enough stars [though one of my friends claimed he saw Mike from the "Real World" and Rory Fox from some 'True Life' special as well] attacked Roddy Piper, then stood around Fairplay!

Fairplay: "Hey, Piper: Just when you thought YOU had all the answers, I CHANGED THE QUESTIONS!"

(65)

While this was going on, me and the others were watching the show...

Nevada: "Wow...there's a lot of Tough Enough guys in there...say, Jared, that one Tough Enough guy Hawk works for IWA-MS, right? Why didn't they sign him in NWATNA for this angle? He'd fit in well with that stable..." A voice then followed him...

Voice: "Well, from what I heard, NWATNA wasn't offering him as much as his present employers were..."

Nevada: "Oh, sure...IWA-MS pays more than NWATNA? Who'd he be working for if that's the case?" Suddenly, Hawk Younkins showed himself to Nevada and locked an 'Evil Face' on him, paralyzing Vance with fear!

Younkins: "The Redemption Crew..." Just then, Ms.Hardy ran over.

Hardy: "GET DOWN! He's one of them!" Instantly, Jared and Ms.Hardy stood to fight the guy. Seeing nothing else to do, I headed over, only to see Alex do the same...

<<Options: FIGHT/ ITEM/RUN: Fight>> I started attacking Hawk with some nice moves. Jared and Ms.Hardy strangely stayed in place...

"Why aren't you guys doing anything?"

Jared: "This is a fight! We can't make a move until our turn to!" Just then, I saw a sign above Hawk go off...

<<POWER: EVIL FACE>>(Re-Release Note: YES, I am actually using Hawk's "Evil Face" as his finisher. It actually worked fairly well when I used Hawk in the original wOwfed as a general bodyguard-type, so it was a natural to translate him to wOw Memorial...) Instantly, Hawk locked on an Evil Face, as we became nearly paralyzed with fear for some reason. Just then, Alex took off, and a sign came over his head as he began to glow somewhat...

<<LIMIT BREAK: PSYCHO-CRUSHER>> Instantly, Alex threw out some beam from his mind and attacked Hawk, getting him to break the Evil Face on the rest of us!

Jared: "Excellent! I can attack now!" <<OPTIONS: FIGHT/ITEM/RUN: Fight>> I saw Jared take a chair from the bar and try to crack it onto Hawk's head.

Ms.Hardy: "I'll finish this off! <<Options: FIGHT/MAGIC/ITEM/RUN: Magic: FIRE>> Instantly, Ms.Hardy apparently managed to conjure up a fire, setting Hawk ablaze! Hawk dropped and rolled as Ms.Hardy and Jared got together. (Re-Release Notes: To answer a possible misconception on whether Ms.Hardy is a sorceress or not in wOw Memorial, the answer would be, in short, "I don't know yet." I originally used this since it's natural for virtually anyone in an RPG to use magic and have no one question why [which is why Jared Steele later began to use rudimentary magic in these as well...]. However, my top assistant has really loved the concept of Ms.Hardy being a legit sorceress, so...I don't know as of yet. Keep reading and find out...please? I'll be your best fwiend...)

Jared: "Wow...I didn't know you could create fire..."

Ms.Hardy: "No offense, but what you don't know could fill a warehouse. Now let's get out of here..."

Nevada: "Hey...won't you tell us what the problem is?"

Ms.Hardy: "Later- let's just get the hell out of here!" The three left the area.

Shelley: "Oh, sure- they dine, break up the place, and dash? Eh, I think I'll just stay here- watch the PPV..." Just then, the owner came down to see the mess, and it didn't look good...

Owner: "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED HERE?"

"Um...uh...gang violence did it... Violent gangs... I think that all the members may have been members of visible minority groups, too..." The owner looked at Alex after this...

Owner: "Don't lie to me: You did it, didn't you, punk?"

Shelley: "Of course not! It's actually very believable: You see, Hawk from Tough Enough 2 came in and started some shit with some friends of mine, who proceeded to use magic to defeat him and then left..."

Owner: "Oh, yeah, I should believe that shit after what you did last night to that poor Mando Guerrero...he's a freaking legend. I think you might want to leave..." Darn...why do all the good bars have to be owned by marks?

"I see...I'll go too..."

Owner: "Don't bother- you can stay. I love the stuff you're doing to that self-obsessed jerk Court H. Bauer...hey: Pour Potsmoker here a drink, on me!" Ooh...a mark who's a fan of my work owns this bar; that's a good thing... I took him up on his offer and sat down, continuing to watch the PPV...

Super-X Tournament Qualifying Match: Team Britain (Hade Vansen, Jonny Storm, Adam Windsor, Nigel McGuinness)

This match was actually fairly good for what it was. I was surprised: The mix of technical wrestlers and high flyers in Team Britain would theoretically not work for a good show, but they put on a surprisingly good matchup considering this. Hade Vansen was the first to go- no surprise, considering he still is a relatively small name in the US. Nigel McGuinness soon followed- also no surprise; a technical whiz like him wouldn't fit in with the names already confirmed for the tournament. Storm and Windsor put on a nice show, peaking with Adam Windsor hitting a Kryptonite Krunch on Jonny Storm to take the British entry in the tournament. Not too bad...

(30, 79, 54)

Super-X Tournament Qualifying Match: Team Australia (Nathan Jones, Ashley Hudson, Michael Foster, Sam Greco)

(Re-Release Notes: YES, I have Nathan Jones as a member of the X-Division for purposes of this team. I blame the fact that RaveX Australian workers' stats are so low that he's actually the best of the bunch from Australia in the game, which is both bogus and sad...)

Okay. No Australian can wrestle. There, I've said it, and these guys are proving it for me. This match was just a poor outing, which I'd expect from the extremely poor Team Australia. It's one thing of how bad it is when Nathan Jones is forced into the X-Division. It's another thing when he's the worker of the group. The other team members weren't that great, as obscure Australian kickboxer Sam Greco, obscure southern-based indy wrestler Ashley Hudson, and obscure New England-based wrestler Michael Foster (What, were the Bushwhackers unavailable for the X-Division? Come on...) did nothing more than to make me long for the days of Outback Jack. Ashley Hudson got the win, but I was loaded with indifference...

(39, 61, 50)

Chris Sabin v. Jason Cross

Mike Tenay: "This match came about from the Super-X qualifiers on XPlosion: Apparently, after Jason Cross's win in the qualifiers there, Chris Sabin's offered him this X-Title shot!"

Don West: "THIS IS A GREAT AWPPUHTUNITY FOR JASAWN CRAWSS HERE, TENAY! AWPPUHTUNITY! AWPPUHRTUNITY!"

Match: Well, it wasn't as bad as the last one, to say the least. The two actually put on a decent show, with a lot of good action going through in this one. Sabin and Cross made each other look fairly good, even if the fans were DEAD (probably the result of leaving en masse from the last debacle of a match.) Pretty standard X-Division fare, here, actually. Chris Sabin got the victory, which works: There's still stuff he can do as champ of this division.

(38, 80, 59)

After the match, Sabin and Cross shook hands in the ring...until the TNATron hit again...

(INT. A recording studio. Jerry Jarrett is sitting next to some guys in suits.)

Jarrett: "Who are we supposed to use here? We need the next big thing in the music scene!" A voice comes through a speakerphone...

Female voice: "Well, we've got two people with meetings scheduled here..."

Suit 1: "Send the first one in..." Instantly, a nondescript guy came into the fray.

Suit 2: "Um...who are you supposed to be?"

Guy: "You must know of me, I'm Stone Leppard, man! I'm a rock star!" (Re-Release Notes: I SWEAR that I got the approval from naiwf in order to have this cameo in the diary...)

Jarrett: "Okay...how do we know this?"

Leppard: "I'm...I'm a rock star!"

Suit 1: "Um...could you play us something, then?"

Leppard: "Why should I play stuff...I'm...I'm a rock star!"

Suit 2: "Well...how do we know you're a rock star if you won't play us something?"

Leppard: "Um...rock stars play instruments?"

Jarrett: "Don't waste our time...NEXT?" Instantly, the guy from the last show was seen from the back. Leppard was leaving, shouting "But...I'm a rock star!"

Man: "Are you ready to get your minds blown?"

Suit 1: "Yes...please..." "Goody Two Shoes" played in the background as the view continued, this time of the man playing an instrument for the people. The suits were noticeably impressed.

Jarrett: "I think this guy's exactly what we need..." The man said some other stuff:

Man: "Hey...it doesn't matter what you SAY you are something, it's that you can SHOW that you are something..."

The screen went to black.

Words: "HEIS COMING"

"TNA: In two weeks: Prepare for the X-Division to get a little more glamorous..."

(79)

D'Lo Brown v. Glenn Gilbertti

This match seemed to come across by the "When in doubt: Pick two people with similar styles and make them fight" plan. This isn't a problem, as when these two were put together, it actually worked. D'Lo and Gilbertti were able to put on a decent show for this, with a pretty straightforward, solid if not spectacular matchup. D'Lo got the win in this- a good thing, as D'Lo seems to have more of a chance as a credible main eventer than Gilbertti does.

(71, 83, 77)

After the break, Jeff Jarrett came to the ring with CM Punk and Julio Dinero for a match with Raven and CarWreck. Jarrett took the mic...

Jarrett: "Well, it looks like you only have one person who'll help you out...that's fine, we're okay with a handicap match..." Raven and CarWreck then came to the ring and took a mic...

Raven: "Oh, I've got a partner, all right..." Just then, Sting came down the ramp to team up with the two!

Jeff Jarrett, CM Punk, and Julio Dinero v. Raven, CarWreck, and Sting

I can't say I'm excited by the thought of Julio Dinero and CarWreck in a TNA main event, but the rest of this looks pretty solid, to say the least. The teams put forth a surprisingly good 6-man tag: Surprising because I've rarely known 6-man matches to be anything close to even a solid matchup. Raven's anger at Jarrett and Punk came through in spades here, and all six people were able to put on decent shows for it. Julio Dinero went to the outside to grab some weaponry to help his teammates, only to have CarWreck hit a Springboard Cascading Entropy on him from the outside! In the ring, CM Punk got to Raven, and CHEATED TO WIN~! against him for the surprising upset. Not a bad thing: Any way to make CM Punk look like more of a threat to Raven will work for this...

(68,78, 73)

After the match, the three tried to beat down Raven, only to have Sting and CarWreck make the save! The show ended as Jarrett and his cronies left the ring...

Over: 65

[Reflecto Is My Favorite Poster]

When I got to the AWA arena the next day, I was still in shock. Who was attacking us? What was the reason why? And why would they send the dude from "Tough Enough" to do the job? I hoped that maybe Jared would know about that, so I waited to find him. However, I was told by John Roche that he had no-showed that night. I was worried what the problem was. I tried to leave, but John grabbed hold of me...

Roche: "Dude...keep watch tonight. I'm hearing word of some serious shit going down here..."

"Like what?"

Roche: "You know- Court H.Bauer's offering a fairly large bounty to any AWA guy who can take the title from you, Bauer's demanding anyone who gets in the ring with a wOw guy shoot...that sort of thing."

"I'll keep that in mind."

Roche: "Do so...you know what happened the last time..." I flashed back to the Super-8 and the resulting ankle surgeries. "Yep..."

Roche: "You need some help. Try getting your mind off of it. Here, I've got a tape of Sin..." John Roche popped the tape in as we watched.

wOw Sin

Your hosts are RD Reynolds and Tony Schiavone.

As wOw Sin started, Roderick Strong was in the ring, waiting for his opponent. Just then, "Bedrock Anthem" hit as a guy dressed as Fred Flintstone came to the ring and began to attack Strong!

Chris Freestone v. Roderick Strong

In order to find out how truly bad this match was, I had to go to someone in the know. In this case, I give you one of the medics for wOw, Dr.Bones McCoy!

McCoy:"Dammit, Narrator, I'm a Doctor, not a...oh, wait, you got it right..."

So, Dr.McCoy...you were there...could you tell us what the crowd was like for this match?"

McCoy:"They were dead, Narrator..."

I see...no crowd response...this is surprising. Roderick Strong's usually a very good worker. What's happening towards this? I know in-house guys get preferential treatment in whacked Out wrestling, but Strong?

McCoy: "He was sent down to wOw's developmental federation, Armageddon Championship Wrestling as a result of this match- his career's presumed dead, Narrator..."

I see. It's a shame that Roderick Strong's being forced to take the blame for Chris Freestone's bad match...that guy has never been anything to write home about, and the gimmick he uses...what the hell is the gimmick he uses?

McCoy: "He's Fred, Narrator..."

Okay...but really: Why would they give these two a matchup on wOw TV?

McCoy: "The booking team are braindead, Narrator..."

Okay...thanks for your time...

(17, 63, 36)

Jacobs and Shelley v. Fast and Furious

WHEN JOBBERS COLLIDE~! You can usually tell which jobber team in a jobber match is going to win by their in-ring actions. Jacobs and Shelley used some nice effects: Jimmy Jacobs with his "HUSS!" and tom-tom, Alex Shelley with looking at a turnbuckle and "making it" spontaneously explode (Have I mentioned how much I love the special effects people in whacked Out wrestling?) Fast and Furious tried to top that, coming out in this NICE street-illegal custom car with a series of females popping out before they do. I almost thought these two could be even...until I remembered the rumors that Jacobs and Shelley hang out backstage with a few different wOwfed stars, many in "the wOwfed clique". Ten to one who's winning this one... You know, in federations that don't push in-house first, this would be a really good matchup. I like work by both of these two teams, and these two seem like it'd be interesting to watch outside of it. However, this is wOw, they're not in-house, so it's a jobber matchup. Fast and Furious used nice moves to attack the more established opponents, but Jacobs and Shelley used their MAGICAL FRIENDS WITH wOwfed CLIQUE MEMBERS POWER~! to fight back and attack. Fast and Furious took the advantage again, until Becky Bayless ran out of the stands and attacked Fast and Furious, allowing Jimmy Jacobs to hit the Suicide Solution for the big victory! After the match, the three celebrated as they went backstage. Not a bad matchup, even if it was introducing a push for the wOw boys' network's new little sidekicks...

(25, 86, 49)

Suddenly, I thought back to this match's taping: It was a little weird. I saw the three headed backstage, only to find Jimmy Jacobs yelling "HUSS", after which Becky Bayless started glomping him...

"Ah...I see you're happy with our new manager..."

Jacobs: "HUSS! HUSS!"

Bayless: "Meany! *glomps*"

"Okay...what's with that?"

Shelley: "(I'm sure Jared told you about Jimmy's little...problem...with the...spirit thing, right?)"

Jacobs: "(Could you think it a little louder? I don't think my MOTHER got that thought in her head...) HUSS!"

Bayless: "Not gonna work on me...*glomps*"

"(I see...I didn't hear about that...Jared's apparently been too busy being hunted for sport by the guy from Tough Enough 2 to try and pass that info to me...)"

Shelley: "(Well, Jimmy happens to be able to see all your basic manner of spirit...)" Jimmy Jacobs then looked at Alex Shelley: "HUSS!"

Shelley: "I'm not a spirit...that doesn't work on me..."

Jacobs: "Oh, sorry...my mistake..." Jacobs then looked at Bayless again... "HUSS!"

Bayless: "I can keep glomping as much as you can keep HUSS-ing...*glomps*"

Shelley: "(But I digress...anyway, as you can probably guess about Becky here...)"

"This isn't going to be one of those 'She's dead, but is able to live as a spirit' things, is it? Because if it is, then I have to wonder why the WWE didn't hire you to play Katie Vick..."

Bayless: "Nopers! Becky Bayless, Earth-bound angel, at your service! *glomps*"

"Well, she's certainly friendly, I'll give her that..."

Shelley: "(Don't glomp Tom Goddard, Becky- you don't know where he's been...)"

"Baka..."

Shelley: "(Hey, I call it like I see it...)"

"Okay...I've got to prepare for my match...I'll see you guys later..."

Shelley: "Aww...but we were just about to start playing Angel-Pong! The more players, the better..." (I'm going to get lynched if I ever go to a Michigan indy show...you all realize that, right? Do you people SEE what risks I put myself in for you people? And all I ask for is people to read this, and get other people to read it in return...well, maybe that, and to have those readers drop trou and lay a Cleveland Steamer on my chest...*sticks tongue out in Homer Simpson-style*...) I had to leave them be as I stopped remembering that little interlude. Maybe that was a good thing... I rememembered I walked through, staying out of camera view, just in time to watch Danny Doring WALKING~! to his matchup. Suddenly, Detective Chris Hamrick came up to him...

Hamrick: "I hope you weren't too worried on last match...but you see, I have many more secrets about you..."

Doring: "Oh, really? Where's the 'I'm a second-rater too lame to even keep my shot with TNA...oh, wait, that's YOU...my mistake..."

Hamrick: "Well, my next little secrets: You can't manage to get any major play since ECW closed. You have no skill as a solo wrestler, and you do NOT know of my little diversions..." Just then, Sherlock Homeless came through and attacked Danny Doring!

Homeless: "This plan...how'd he not guess this? It was just so Elementary, Detective Hamrick..."

Hamrick: "Good show...here's your reward..." Chris Hamrick gave Sherlock Homeless a bottle of Mad Dog 20-20 as wOw went to commercial!

(46)

After the break, Adam Windsor was took the mic.

"Okay...I deserved that, last week. I didn't specify who should come and fight me: I got a WWE guy, I did wrong. But this time, I'll succeed. I challenge any wOw guy to come and fight me! Just then, a dance mix of "All Your Base Are Belong To Us" hit as 57U came to the ring with 3v1l l33t and T3H K36!

57U: "j00 k33p th1nk1n6 j00 h4z d4 5k1llz 2 b34t uz...8ut j00 ph0r63t Th4t j00 w1llz 63t 0WN3D 8y uz! j00 4r3 4v3r463, 8ut w3 4r3 l33t! PH34R T3h l3464nd, PH34R t3h l33t, 4nd PH34R T3H B33R!"

Match: Well, this wasn't too much of a styles clash. It's nowhere near what I'd call a "l33t" match, but the l33thax0rmast0r and Windsor put on a match that was decent enough for TV. The two put on some nice enough moves, managing to mesh fairly well. Suddenly, though, things began to get weird (as if wOw wasn't weird enough...) Adam Windsor got 57U ready for the Kryptonite Krunch, but before he could do that, P4l164ruz and XM6 grabbed T3H K36 and rolled it into the ring! 57U set it up, allowing Adam Windsor to be distracted.

Yes, you heard that right.

Apparently, wOw is having BEER do a run-in in this match.

And you wonder why wOw has less fans in common with Ring of Honor and more in common with Kaiju Big Battel...

I digress. Adam Windsor stops fighting 57U and starts to pour himself a frosty cold one (because, you know, who wouldn't stop a wrestling match for a drink?), allowing 57U to roll him up (spilling the beer on Windsor's face) for a three! Okay...someone tell the bookers to put down the crack pipe...

(28, 75, 45)

Butterbean v. Jay Matthews

Okay...FIRE BUTTERBEAN. Fire him now. Preferably out of a cannon. There is officially no good reason for Butterbean to be on roster. His matches always are lame, and he has no knowledge of pro wrestling. Even his jobbing doesn't work as much. This match had him continue his no-selling streak, making every move Jay Matthews gave out from the first lock-up to the Hype Factor look like nothing...nothing, until Matthews made one quick punch to Butterbean's navel, which made him go down for some reason. Very, very poor: Jay Matthews deserved better. (Butterbean seems to be my biggest problem with wOw Memorial Volume 2 in trying to meld an interesting story with a technically well-played game: The King Hippo gimmick that Butterbean has recieved has apparently gotten very over in the diary, but in the game itself, that doesn't change the fact that Butterbean has abysmal in-game stats. This is a problem, of course, because listening to what the fans want means that I need to "push" Butterbean (or keep creatively jobbing him), but listening to what the game wants says to not use Butterbean at all. I'm not certain whether this merits Arsenic-ing his stats enough so that I can actually use him without putting the show's head in a noose, but that might be a viable option here...)

(44, 47, 40)

Vic Grimes v. Brandon Downard

First request: Push Brandon Downard. He's the future of deathmatch wrestling- I could see him becoming wOw's answer to Mick Foley. Second request: Push Vic Grimes. Preferably off a cliff. Do I make myself clear? This match was actually fairly decent, meaning that wOw brawlers once again succeeded at the impossible dream of carrying Grimes. Thankfully, Brandon Downard got the win with a Facade Breaker. Sometimes I love wOw's penchant for pushing in-house, and this is one of those times...

(47, 72, 53)

Masato Tanaka v. Spanky

Well, this was a total styles clash...It was a good styles clash, for one, but it was still a big styles clash. The two wrestlers put on a very good show (due to both being very good at what they do), but I get the feeling that these two would have been much better with a different opponent. I think a mix-up of the last few matches could help this: Spanky/Jay Matthews would have been fairly sweet, Tanaka/Downard would have owned, and Butterbean/Grimes would mean that we'd only need two bullets...

(66, 81, 65)

(WORLD) Tom Goddard v. Samoa Joe

I didn't have good expectations for this match going into it. Putting Samoa Joe, a great brawler, in the ring with Tom Goddard (a good technical wrestler and high flyer), was a sign saying that this will be a fairly big styles clash. These two didn't put on a match of the quality of the prior one to hide that, which was another problem. The crowd was sort of into it, and the match was okay: I don't know if this was just one of those nights or what, but I didn't feel it. Goddard got the win, as could be expected. After the match, Goddard celebrated...until the Stampede Bulldogs came in and laid Goddard out, then forced an AWAMLW shirt on his chest! Harry Smith took the mic...

Smith: "Goddard- you've been badmouthing AWAMLW too long, but now, you've truly met your match..."

(69, 73, 63)

Over: 51

The tape finally ended, and I decided to get ready for our show. I hoped the others knew this stuff...