The BVS WWE: 2004-05

[GCCWolverine]

Is it the rehashing of the Noble/Hurricane/Nidia angle?

[The Third Dukes]

Okay, folks, we have a winner. jesse_ewiak PM'd me the correct answer to the Hidden Contest. The answer is that this is the rehashing...

Ward: "Whatcha doin', Natey?"

Nathan: "I'm gonna teach those two a lesson. They think they're so special -- just cuz these people like them. They think they can fool 'em. They can't fool me. I know just what they're about. And as soon as one of 'em appears -- I don't care who -- they're gettin' it, mate. They ain't makin' it to Judgment Day. It's gonna be right <bleep> now!"

He winds up. In an instant, Kidman and Torrie walk through the curtain. Torrie screams. Nathan swings forward -- but the chair is no longer in his hands. Kidman and Torrie race to the locker room. Nathan spins around as the camera switches viewpoints to over his shoulder. The Undertaker is standing behind him, holding the chair with both hands.

Taker: "I wouldn't do that if I was you, kid."

Substitute Randy Savage for Kidman, Miss Elizabeth for Torrie, Jake the Snake for Nathan, and Deadman Taker for Badass Taker, and you have the famous SNME angle from 1991 that was Undertaker's face turn. It led to Jake Roberts showing up on the Funeral Parlor and questioning whose side Taker was really on. Taker gave the famous reply "Not yours" and the rest is history.

*****

WWE RAW

LIVE from San Jose, CA

May 10, 2004

We open with a look at last week's Intercontinental Title challenge, including a look back at how far these four have come and how they got to tonight. This segues to RNN (somehow), where a beating on Sting is interrupted by the countdown. Jericho returns out of nowhere to clear the ring. Two motion graphics are shown: Chris Benoit w/Molly Holly v. Christian w/Chynna Doll, and Sting and Chris Jericho v. Evolution.

DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE WOULD TELL YOU THAT TWENTY SECONDS OF UNINTERRUPTED PYRO IS A GOOD THING as we begin the show live from the Shark Tank. Sign in the crowd: "CRZ ->" (Hey, remember him?)

JR: "We saw him for the first time in ages last week, and now he squares off against a man who was in the ring with him when he suffered his injury! Welcome to San Jose, California! Welcome to RAW! I'm Jim Ross alongside Diamond Dallas Page, and DDP, I can't wait for tonight's main event!"

DDP: "Oh, man, Jimbo, you talk about excitement and you got it in spades here as Chris Jericho and Sting team up against the three-man wrecking crew that is Evolution!"

JR: "And speaking of Evo... oh, no."

Yup. We're off to the ring, where Randy Orton's RNN NewsDesk is set up.

Orton: "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the greatest thing ever to happen to your lives, RNN! Now, last week, a few plans got turned on their head when it comes to how this show is run, but we aren't about to let a minor setback ruin what is a fine institution, are we? No, no! Just because some old, washed-up, banged-up wrestler came to the ring -- actually, make that TWO old, washed-up, banged-up wrestlers -- we're not about to take this as a setback."

DDP: "Does he mean Jericho?"

Orton: "Instead, we will do what we do best, and that's bring excitement, star power, and of course ratings into your humdrum existence. But, you say, don't I, Randy Orton, have enough excitement and star power for five? Why, of course, and thank you for noticing, but I am referring to what makes wrestling great: conflict. And so, without further ado, let me introduce one of my opponents later tonight -- back after an exclusive 9-month tour of Dr. James Andrews' Rehabilitation Center in Birmingham, Alabama -- Chris Jericho!"

The countdown starts at 15 and counts down to 0, allowing the crowd to pick up the count at 10. The pyro goes off, and Jericho's elaborate entrance begins. JR and DDP spend the time during his entrance to recount his long road back and compare it to HHH's road back from a similar injury just two years ago. Make your own joke here. The point is, as Jericho gets into the ring and stands next to Orton, a HUGE "Y2J" chant breaks out for the next two minutes. Jericho just looks around, half-starstruck, half-humbled. Orton appears to be fed up with it, but he still betrays the feeling of inner happiness that comes from being in the presence of someone as respected and appreciated as Jericho.

Orton: "Chris... welcome back. I'm sure you're thrilled to be making your return in the presence of a real superstar like myself."

Jericho looks around the set, shaking his head.

Jericho: "Randy, Randy, Randy... what have you done with this place? Look at all these props! Is this the Highlight Reel I see before me, drenched in the ego of a man whose accomplishments pale compared to my own? Tell me, Randy... when did I give you permission to do this? Why did you take it upon yourself to act like you could replace me? Are you the hottest commodity in the business? Are you a Living Legend, a Highlight of the Night, an Undisputed Champion? Do people look forward to Raw Is Orton?"

Orton: "They..."

Jericho: "Shut up, Junior; that was a rhetorical question! Look at this place! Look at all the uselessness you have around here! Why even bother with a news desk? Did your feng shui consultant suggest it? And this OrTron 5001 -- is it unbelieveably expensive, like my JeriTron? Looks like you picked it up at a garage sale. Come on, Blandy, get with the program! You're supposed to be the star, not the set!"

Jericho smiles.

Jericho: "Of course, that may explain why the ratings went in the toilet during my injury for the 9 to 9:15 segment."

Orton: "Listen, punk, I did not invite you on this show for you to insult me. You are here to do one of two things -- either apologize for disrupting last week's show or announce your retirement so that you can join the other legends where you belong on the sidelines. I won't have you..."

He stops suddenly, and a camera change reveals why: Jericho is pretending to be asleep on the stool.

Jericho ("waking up"): "Huh? Sorry, I was simply unable to appreciate your THRILLING social commentary, Blandy."

Orton: "Hey! Randy's the name!"

Jericho: "And boredom's your game!"

Orton: "Hey! You're on MY show! This is RNN! You will treat me with respect while I'm on my show!"

Jericho: "No, no, no, Blandy, you don't understand... this is your SKETCH; this is MY show. This is... RAW - IS - JERICHO! And Blandmaster Flash, tonight, on MY show, I'm gonna show you why I am a LIVING legend and not some old washed-up loser... like, say, Cowboy Bob Orton?"

Orton gets serious and stands toe-to-toe with Jericho. We see that Orton is 4-6 inches taller than Jericho, and certainly looks more physically impressive.

Orton: "Why should I be afraid of you, Chris? Look at you. Look at your muscles -- did you even bother to stay in shape while you were in rehab? You're a pathetic, unimpressive being. And tonight, you will see why YOU WERE and I AM. I will take your legacy, your career -- your LIFE -- and I will destroy it. That's not just a promise; that's a statement of fact."

Jericho takes a step back.

Orton: "What's wrong? Scared?"

Jericho: "Nah... just that sometimes, you gotta step away from a problem to solve it!"

With that, Jericho leaps and tackles Orton. Both men begin brawling all over the set before Jericho gets the upper hand. Orton leaves the ring and brushes himself off, as if he doesn't want to be soiled by Jericho. Jericho looks around the set before getting an idea. He picks up one stool and, with a mighty swing, takes down the news desk. He then takes the other stool, steps back a few paces, yells, and with a mighty heave, shatters the OrTron's screen. Jericho's music plays as he stands over the remains of RNN.

JR: "Thank gawd, Randy Orton has just been put in his place! Y2J is back with a vengeance, and it's high time, too! I can't wait for the main event tonight! Come back, folks! We're just warming up!"

***COMMERCIAL***

We see Molly Holly and Chris Benoit backstage.

Molly (holding Benoit's feet down as he does sit-ups): "You got him, Chris. Don't worry about Chynna; just focus on Christian. There's no way he can beat you."

Benoit (between situps): "That's right... I'm the best technical wrestler ever... he can't hold a candle to me... he..."

Benoit stops. Eric Bischoff is leaning over the both of them, smiling his classic million-dollar smile. Molly sneers at him, instinctively covering her top to keep Bischoff from looking down her shirt.

Molly: "What do YOU want?"

Bischoff: "Oh, nothing. I just wanted to make sure you knew that WHEN Christian wins tonight -- and Chris, it will be a when -- then next week, you're going to have to go through with whatever he wants. I mean, he can't force you to do something illegal, but... well, if he wants you to act like a Diva, I'm not going to stop him."

Molly (desperate): "You can't do that!"

Bischoff: "Why not? I'm the GM of RAW. What I say... goes. Oh, and Molly, I'll make sure to have the cameras rolling. I'm sure what Christian has in mind will earn a spot in my personal favorite videos collection."

Bischoff walks off. Molly stares at Benoit, her face a mask of concern.

Molly: "Is he serious?"

Benoit: "Doesn't matter. I'm winning the match. You got nothing to worry about."

We return to the announcers as intros for the next match begin.

JR: "What a pathetic, sick human being. Eric Bischoff... you shouldn't be allowed to humiliate someone like that! She wants to be a wrestler, dammit! This is sick!"

DDP: "Jim, I'd like to comment on this, but... to be honest, the only thing I can think is, thank God Lawler ain't here in my place. Why can't Bischoff separate his business from his pleasure? It's just not right."

JR: "I'll tell ya what it is, Page. It's the act of an immoral, worthless human being! Molly's flesh and blood! She's not a walking Playboy magazine! And even if she was comfortable... it's a matter of permission! You're supposed to... dammit."

DDP: "Look, Jim, can we just focus on the match at hand? After all, it might be enough to get out of this bad mood."

JR: "Yeah, I guess... folks, our next match is between a couple of rising stars here -- and they were opponents last week as well in a tag match."

DDP: "That's right, Jim, and while Mondo here got the pin, he didn't get in on ol' Jeter. And now, Johnny wants to show he can go with the big boys. This oughta be a fun one."

Johnny Jeter (w/Jackie Gayda) vs. Nick Mondo (w/Stacy Keibler)

Jeter and Mondo lock up. Jeter backs Mondo into the corner and unloads with right hands. He winds up and hits a discus punch on Mondo, then shows off for Jackie. Mondo pulls himself up and tosses Jeter into the corner, punching away at him. He tosses Jeter across the ring, but his followup attack hits the turnbuckle, and Jeter gets a back suplex. He covers for two.

Jeter punches down on Mondo, then bounces off the ropes, but his elbowdrop misses. Mondo scampers to the top rope and dives off for M.Bison, but Jeter sidesteps. Of course, Mondo lands on his feet, but turns around straight into a spinkick from Jeter. He covers for two. Jeter picks Mondo up and whips him into the ropes, but Jeter puts his head down.

Mondo kicks Jeter and delivers a clothesline. He picks Jeter up over his head for the Assault Driver, but Jackie gets on the apron. Mondo is distracted by her feminine wiles, allowing Jeter to counter to a Victory Roll for the three and the win at 4:12.

WINNER: Johnny Jeter

JR: "And Johnny steals another one! I tell ya, if he keeps Jackie by his side, he'll have a long career here!"

DDP: "Hey, I don't blame Nick at all for being distracted there, do you?"

Jackie hugs Jeter in the ring, then performs a victory dance that Jeter watches, smiling.

We cut to backstage, where Christian and Chynna are watching on a monitor.

Christian: "Yeah... that's what I'm talking about. That's what Divas should be doing -- not trying to win men's titles. And next week, that's what Molly will find out first-hand."

Chynna: "I'm going to enjoy seeing her so humiliated."

Molly (off-camera): "If you like it, try it, freak!"

Molly pounces on Chynna, taking her down and smashing her fist into Chynna's face. Christian tries to separate them, but Benoit holds him off. Molly yanks Chynna's top off (Chynna is face-down the whole time) and leaves her wearing only the slightest of covering. She rips the pants off of Chynna as well. Chynna stumbles off-stage, trying to fend off Molly.

Molly: "That's one thing you'll NEVER make me do! How do you like it?"

***COMMERCIAL***

JR: "Welcome back, folks, and before we left, we saw a very determined Molly Holly attempting to send a message to Chynna about tonight's match."

We replay the footage, for the five of you just tuning in. After this, the intros begin for the next match.

JR: "And later tonight, when Chris Benoit and Christian face off... well, we've just found out that there's a bigger stipulation involved. If Christian wins, not only is he the Intercontinental Champion, but next week, he has pretty much free reign over Molly!"

DDP: "And how would any of us like to be in that situation? How can you possibly justify it? It's a death knell, really, for decency. We all know what Christian thinks of her, we all know what he plans to have her do, and we all hate it."

JR: "Well, let's not jump the gun, Page. Benoit is an astounding technical competitor, and right now, I would imagine he has the advantage over Christian, especially if their match at Backlash is any indication."

DDP: "You're right -- Benoit made short work of Christian there. But I think he's gonna find it tougher going tonight. Christian is a motivated man, and he's motivated by a dangerous emotion -- lust."

JR: "Lust? It's pure hatred!"

DDP: "Hear me out, Jim! He sees Molly not as a person, but as something to satisfy his needs. Whether he believes it or not, he's turning into someone very dangerous here. This is no way to go through life, Jim. Women -- even the Divas -- they're more than just their image. They're people too! And in the real world, that's how they wanna be treated -- like people! Unless Christian can get over his childish notions and act like people are equal... well, he may be champion, but he'll never be respected. His attitude right now is most definitely a Bad Thing."

JR: "I can't agree more. Folks, our next match... well, I don't think it's going to be as competitive as the title match later tonight..."

DDP: "Let's just say it! It's a rookie against a man at the top of the ladder. This is going to be a slaughter."

Sylvain Grenier (w/Lucille LaChienne) vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels locks up and applies a headlock. Grenier tries to suplex Michaels, but Michaels lands on his feet. Grenier turns around and is punched into the ropes. Michaels tries to whip Grenier into the ropes, but Grenier reverses. Michaels comes flying out with a forearm shot, sending Grenier to the outside.

Grenier heads to Lucille for advice, allowing Michaels to dive over the top onto both of them. Michaels continues punching down Grenier before tossing him back into the ring. Michaels climbs to the top rope and, as Grenier stands up, hits a bodypress to Grenier's back (turn around, Sylvain! oh, never mind), rolling him over for two.

Michaels picks Sylvain up and sends him into the ropes, but Sylvain returns with a clothesline on Michaels. He hits the ropes and drops his knee in the general vicinity of Michaels' head for two. Grenier puts on a headlock, trying to wear down Michaels' neck, but Michaels fights up to his feet. Michaels gets a back suplex on Grenier, then ascends to the top rope.

He dives off with the flying elbow, and a split second later, the pyro explodes from the stage as Kane makes his entrance. Michaels pops back up, scared out of his mind, as Kane steps over the top rope and into the ring. Kane grabs Michaels by the throat at 5:06.

WINNER by disqualification: Shawn Michaels

Kane chokeslams Michaels to the mat. Grenier and Lucille head to the back as Kane stalks Michaels. He picks Michaels up over his back and plants him with the Burning Hammer. As Michaels twitches on the mat, Kane raises his arms and sets off the pyro again. He stares at Michaels as his music plays.

JR: "This is disgusting! Why, Kane? Why are you doing this? What did Shawn Michaels ever do to you?"

DDP: "I don't think it matters, Jim! You're talking like you expect Kane to be a logical being! He's a monster! Everything he's done has been for nothing more than pain! You still have the scars to prove it -- why are you so surprised?"

JR: "This is a pathetic assault on... NOW what?"

Michaels is on his hands and knees. Kane perches himself on the top rope as Michaels slowly stands up, unaware of Kane's presence. Kane dives off the top rope with his lariat onto Michaels. He gives the cut-throat signal and picks Michaels up in the Tombstone position. As he does so, he puts one foot on the middle turnbuckle.

JR: "Oh no... good gawd don't do it..."

Kane shifts his weight so that he pushes off the second turnbuckle upward, with Michaels in the position. He gets elevated up almost to the height of the top rope before crashing down on his knees. He releases Michaels soon after impact, and Michaels' head gets to almost a foot and a half in the air before Michaels lands on his back. Kane folds Michaels' arms over his chest before smiling.

JR: "AND DAMMIT HE MAY HAVE JUST KILLED THE HEARTBREAK KID RIGHT THERE IN THE DAMN RING! KANE -- THE INHUMAN MONSTER -- MAY HAVE ENDED THE LIFE -- NOT JUST THE CAREER BUT THE LIFE -- OF SHAWN MICHAELS!"

DDP: "He's not moving."

JR: "No he isn't, Page. This... I was at ringside when he suffered a blackout against the late, great Owen Hart. This is too frighteningly similar. Folks, we'll be right back... we need to help Shawn out here."

***COMMERCIAL***

JR: "Folks, welcome back, and... the mood has been somewhat darkened here by the knowledge that Shawn Michaels has been taken to a local hospital for observation... he received probably the damnedest move I've ever seen in my 25 years of calling this sport... a Tombstone's bad enough, but Kane pushed off the turnbuckles to get elevation on it!"

DDP: "What just happened was a travesty. Kane should be fined and susp... no, no... Kane should be ARRESTED for what he did. There is zero excuse for the way he treated Shawn Michaels in there. I really hope Shawn is in good condition, and we've seen him bounce back from a lot of bad things in there, Jim. But this is... I'm disgusted."

Evolution's music begins as the announcers continue talking.

JR: "Folks, the show really has to go on here, and... well, this is an interesting decision here by Eric Bischoff. I thought this would be on at the end of the show. But anyway, it looks like we're about to see the first match in 38 weeks of a man that I've sorely missed. Evolution is coming out here -- and they certainly aren't pushovers, Page."

DDP: "Oh, absolutely, Jim, these guys are tough, and they are ready to take on anyone that comes in their way. But I gotta wonder if they're as unified as they claim. I mean, ya look at how Michael Shane was treated at Backlash -- ya don't think that still eats at him?"

We cut backstage, where Sting and Jericho are headed to the ring.

Jericho: "Let's go, Stinger! This is for all of us, man. This is our time now!"

They round the corner, but Rhyno is waiting for them as they wait in what insiders would call the gorilla position, behind the curtain.

Jericho: "You in this match?"

Rhyno: "I'm in your life. I just want to remind you that whether it's your show or not... it's MY TITLE."

Jericho: "I see that. So you beat HHH for this? Man, things sure changed while I was gone. Well, it's nice to meet ya, shorty. Just remember to keep the belt warm for me, got it?"

Rhyno: "You're making a mistake. You should fear me!"

Jericho: "Why? You got a gun?"

Sting: "Hey, hey -- save this for your time. I gotta get going, and I want you in one piece in my corner, you got that?"

And with that, Sting walks through the curtain to the Crow Music. He stands in the aisle, awaiting his tag team partner, staring at Evolution. Thankfully, the countdown starts at only 5 this time and goes from there.

3-on-2 Handicap match: Evolution vs. Sting and Chris Jericho

Sting starts with Shane, and the duo lock up. Shane punches Sting, but a whip into the ropes is reversed and Sting gets a powerslam. Batista enters, and Sting catches him with a chop on the run, staggering him. Sting picks Shane up and throws him at Batista, then turns to Orton and demands to face him.

Orton backs off, noting he's not the legal man, allowing Shane to roll Sting up for two. Shane tries to send Sting into the corner, but Sting reverses and follows in with a Stinger Splash. Shane staggers out, and Sting scoops Shane up before planting him in position for the Death Drop. Before he can execute it, however, Orton blasts Sting in the back, and Shane escapes to the top rope and missile dropkicks Sting.

Shane brings in Batista, who immediately picks Sting up and throws him to the outside. As Batista distracts the ref, Orton and Shane stomp Sting on the outside. Orton tosses Sting into the steps, then rolls him back in. Batista tosses Sting into the Evolution corner, where he gets triple-teamed. Batista tags in Orton, who tosses Sting into the ropes and chop blocks him on the way out.

Orton grabs the leg and twists it in a spinning toe hold near the ropes, and as the ref checks on Sting, Orton grabs Batista. Sting begins to fall onto his back, earning a two count before popping back up. The referee looks up, but Batista has let go just in time. However, the act of letting go allows Sting to cradle Orton for two.

Sting stands up, but Orton kicks him in the leg to stop the rally. He grabs Sting and wraps his leg around the bottom rope, pulling up in an illegal hold for emphasis. The referee orders Orton to break, so he does, then makes a show of being clean. Sting pulls himself to his feet and spins Orton around, punching him repeatedly. Orton stops it with a kick to the leg, then brings in Batista as we take a break.

***COMMERCIAL***

Batista is applying a leglock to Sting, who is crawling his way to his corner, trying to drag Batista behind him. As Sting is inches away, Batista pulls Sting back to the Evolution corner and brings Orton back in. Orton stomps on the back of Sting's knee, then lifts Sting's leg up and slams it down knee-first. With Sting incapacitated, Orton spins the leg around, howls mockingly, then completes a figure-four.

Sting struggles, but Orton is the one near the ropes, so Sting has a long way to go. Shane drops off the apron and grabs Orton's hands, then Batista drops off and grabs Shane's legs, forming a long chain that almost makes it to the aisle. Sting is desperately reaching for anything to break the hold, as well as trying hard not to hit the mat with his hands (the ref is asking if he wants to tap). Sting finally passes out, and the ref makes two before looking up and seeing the chain. He breaks the chain (Shane falls face-first on the floor), and Sting is able to reverse the figure-four.

Orton scrambles to the ropes and demands Batista come in for the tag. Batista grabs Sting in a powerbomb position, but Sting trips Batista and catapults him into Orton. Sting makes the long crawl to his own corner, but just before he can make the tag, Shane dives in and cuts it off. Shane stomps Sting, then whips him into the ropes. Shane hits a superkick to Sting, covering for two. Shane goes up top, and the Picture Perfect Elbow connects.

Orton demands to tag in, so Shane obliges. Orton covers, but it's only two. Orton looks shocked, then confident. He bounces off the ropes for the RKO, but Sting uses his momentum to guillotine him on the top rope. Jericho gets the tag and blasts away at Orton, sending him into the corner and getting the facejam on the way out. Jericho then hits the springboard dropkick (which is how he got hurt) on Batista, followed by shaking his leg out and smiling.

Shane enters the ring and crossbodies Jericho for two before an Evolution triple-team begins. Sting enters and picks off Batista whipping him into the corner and Stinger Splashing him. Sting stares at Orton, who simply leaves ringside. Meanwhile, Jericho gets a powerbomb on Shane, then (Jericho/Sting) gets the (Walls/Scorpion) on (Shane/Batista), respectively. Both men struggle before tapping out at 18:07.

WINNERS: Sting and Chris Jericho

JR: "What a comeback for Chris Jericho! What a way to return to RAW! It was 3 against 2, but Jericho got the victory! He and Sting have the huge mental edge! What do you think of them now, Randy? What do you think of them now?"

DDP: "He probably thinks they aren't better than he is! Soon as it became clear his team could lose, he left the ring! He's been hanging teammates out to dry left and right!"

JR: "The man's got a pristine reputation to protect, and rather than do it in the ring, he runs away! What a gutless man he is! Folks, coming up next, we have two of the top contenders to the women's title going at it, as Victoria battles Trish Stratus! Get ready for women's action as only the WWE can provide!"

***COMMERCIAL***

JR: "Folks, welcome back, and it's time for two top fighters in the WWE women's division to be going at it, as the always-dangerous Trish Stratus faces off against Victoria. But before we do that, we want to show you this interesting confrontation from earlier tonight backstage."

We are backstage as Victoria is walking the halls, noticeably more intense than the previous week.  Lucille LaChienne taps her on the shoulder.

Victoria: "WHAT?"

Lucille: "Don't what me.  You know why I am here.  What was with thinking I would shake your hand last week?"

Victoria: "What the hell are you talking about?"

Lucille: "Last week.  After our match.  You offered your hand to me.  Why?"

Victoria: "Listen, bitch, I've never seen you before in my life.  Now beat it before I use you as warmups for Trish.  Have I made myself clear?"

Lucille: "What are you, mad?  We fought last..."

Victoria shoves her aside, into some conveniently placed garbage bags.  She storms off.

Lucille: "Ick!  American filth!"

DDP: "That doesn't seem to make much sense. I mean... where was the nice girl we saw last week? Has someone lit a fire under her?"

JR: "I wouldn't be too surprised. Alliances around here can change in an instant. You know that, Page."

When Victoria enters, she almost stomps to the ring, sneer on her face. Trish appears a little concerned, but offers her hand for a pre-match handshake.

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Victoria slaps away Trish's hand and throws a forearm into her face. Trish gets sent into the ropes, and Victoria hits a backdrop on Trish. She grinds her boot into Trish's eyes, then lifts her up and backs her into the corner. Victoria punches Trish in the throat, and while Trish is gasping for breath, the referee warns Victoria.

Victoria threatens to hit the ref, but the distraction allows Trish to attack with a kick to the head and a rollup for two. Victoria gets up and clotheslines Trish inside out. She goes up top, but Trish shakes the ropes, then hits the Stratusphere for two. She tries to punch Victoria in the mounted position, but Victoria simply shoves her off. Victoria then punches Trish repeatedly in the corner, boxing her down to the mat.

Victoria grabs Trish and tosses her like a piece of luggage across the ring. Victoria sets Trish throat-first on the ropes and slingshots the top rope into Trish's neck. Victoria nonchalantly covers for two. Victoria slugs away on Trish, but Trish punches back, only to lose that battle when Victoria grabs Trish's hair and yanks her down. Victoria chokes Trish on the mat, as the ref counts to four. Victoria picks Trish up and turns her around, nailing the Widow's Peak. She covers Trish with one hand, getting the pin at 5:18.

WINNER: Victoria

JR: "Wow. This is not the same Victoria we saw last week. She's almost... this is vicious! This is a mean streak a mile wide, Page!"

DDP: "Hey, you never know. Maybe she saw her tape last week and said, no way can I get away with that against someone as skilled as Trish, so I gotta mix it up."

Or maybe not, as Victoria picks Trish up and delivers a second Widow's Peak after the bell.

JR: "How about that, Page?"

DDP: "Hey, I'm allowed to be wrong once every five years."

JR: "Whatever, Page. You're as bad as Lawler was. Folks, when we come back, it'll be the Intercontinental Title on the line. Chris Benoit and Christian square off, and with Chynna a known factor, Molly Holly will be at ringside to even the score. Don't go away!"

DDP: "I am not!"

***COMMERCIAL***

Backstage, Teddy Long and his wacky mismatched cast of wrestlers are in an unidentified storage room.

Long: "Hey playas. This is Theodore Long here. Now after the injustice of last week, I figured there was no way The Man was gonna let us get our own revenge, Playa's Club style, on that white woman who stole our property, belie dat. So we decided to exact a little street justice on her. Now, don't be scared, all you crackas out there, we didn't kill her or abuse her. That ain't what a brutha's about, belie dat. But we are interested in showin' her and all the white fans out there that we ain't some carnival. We are the new wave, belie dat. Show 'em what we mean, girls."

The camera pulls back to show Jazz and Gail standing on either side of the fan from last week, who is bound, gagged, and terrified. Jazz leans over and gets in the girl's face.

Jazz: "Girl, you damn better be grateful we ain't like you white people think we are. Otherwise, we'd send these badasses after ya."

She points off-camera, from whence Chris Nowinski and Rodney Mack emerge.

Jazz: "When the time comes, we gon' show you that we demand respect. None o' you crackas seem to get it, do ya? Well, now ya do! Now we have yo' attention, girl! Tell 'em, sista!"

Gail: "Are you scared of what we can do? Can you appreciate what it's like now to be held back? Cuz that's what we've been. But now, with Jazz owning the women's title, we won't be held back. It'll be white chicks like you who have no appreciation for us, who see us by the color of our skin. Well, I joined this group to get respect -- to stop being seen as the token Asian chick. Is that how you see me?"

The fan shakes her head rapidly.

Gail: "I think she's lying."

Jazz: "Girl, you betta not be lyin!"

She shakes her head more emphatically.

Jazz: "I think we got through to her."

(Of note: as Long speaks, Nowinski changes from a smile to a look of pondering.)

Long: "All right, all right, dat's enough, girls. You see, missy, we ain't your daddy's group. We ain't gonna let The Man and his high-and-mighty glass ceiling stop us anymore. Soon, all y'all crackas gonna feat Theodore Long and his Playa's Club. C'mon... let's go. She can sit here a while and think about it. Chris, keep this cracka fool company."

The others walk off. Nowinski sits by the girl, who's now petrified. Nowinski does nothing, as he's still lost in thought. We go to the announcers at ringside.

JR: "I don't know what to say, other than... maybe that poor girl shouldn't have shown up at the arena this week. Just despicable actions by Theodore Long. Is this how to be a player, Page?"

DDP: "You know, Booker T's sitting at home right now, nursing the back that Rhyno beat up last week, but I gotta wonder... what does HE think of this? I mean, not to generalize, and that's not my intention, but... does Booker T think of Theodore Long as a representative of the street, or of the black community? I don't know anymore."

JR: "I seriously hope he doesn't."

Intros for the next match begin.

JR: "Well, folks, we've been waiting for this all night. Earlier tonight, Eric Bischoff upped the ante when he promised that a win for Christian would give him essentially free reign over how Molly would present herself next week. And Page, I gotta tell ya -- I'm not sure I wanna know what he thinks."

DDP: "Well, let's hope it doesn't come to that. This is why Molly Holly is at ringside in the first place -- to prevent that sort of thing from happening. This is why Chynna Doll is going to be neutralized. And if it's one-on-one, well, we already know how that'll go -- Chris Benoit destroyed Christian at Backlash."

JR: "Granted, but that was at Edmonton. This is worlds away."

Intercontinental title match: Chris Benoit (w/Molly Holly, champion) vs. Christian (w/Chynna Doll, challenger)

Christian attacks as Benoit is being checked by the referee. He punches away at Benoit in the corner, stopping only to say something to Molly. Benoit uses the opening to reverse Christian to the corner and chops away. He mounts the second turnbuckle, punches Christian nine times (with the fans counting), gets down, and chops Christian hard again, knocking him to the outside for a conference with Chynna.

Benoit also heads to the outside and lands forearms and punches to Christian's head, but Chynna intercepts him and goes low. Christian gets a DDT on the outside as Chynna gloats, but Molly leaps off the apron onto Chynna and punches away. Back in the ring, Benoit grabs Christian from behind, but Christian gets a mule kick. Christian runs the ropes and delivers a clothesline to Benoit.

Christian gets in the UFC position and punches away at Benoit before pointing at Molly and making gyrating motions. This draws Molly into the ring, but Earl Hebner restrains her, allowing Chynna to enter and the heels to get a double suplex on Benoit. Christian covers Benoit as Hebner turns around, but it only gets two. Christian sends Benoit's face into the top turnbuckle, hitting a German suplex on him as he staggers out.

Christian then puts an armlock on Benoit while seated over him. Benoit slowly gets to his feet with Christian riding piggyback, but Chynna trips him up from the outside and Christian goes back to the armlock. However, their newfound vicinity to the ropes allows Benoit to hook his leg in them, causing the break. Christian picks Benoit up and delivers a shoulderbreaker to him. He goes back to the seated armbar as we take a break.

***COMMERCIAL***

Benoit makes it to his feet and begins chopping Christian to break the hold. He sends Christian into the ropes, and this time Molly trips him up. Christian stops to yell at Molly, who feigns innocence, but this allows Chynna to come up from behind and toss Molly into the steps. As Christian points and gloats, Benoit grabs him from behind in a German suplex. He rolls through with it and hits a second German suplex. He rolls through with that and gets a third German suplex.

As Christian lies prone on the mat, Benoit goes to the top turnbuckle and delivers the cut-throat signal. Before he can leap, though, Chynna shoves Benoit off the top to the mat. Chynna gloats, so Molly spins Chynna around and slaps her. Chynna slaps back, so Molly spears Chynna into the apron.

Meanwhile, back in the ring, Benoit gets up first and shakes his arm. He pulls Christian to his feet, but Christian grabs Benoit's arm and pulls it into a Crossface of his own. Benoit struggles to make the ropes as Molly cheers him on. Benoit rolls through the move, putting Christian on his shoulders and getting two before Christian pulls it back.

Benoit slowly slides over and finally gets his free hand to the ropes. Christian tries to pull Benoit back, but Benoit gets a solid grip on the ropes and Christian is forced to break. Christian starts hitting Benoit's bicep, but in doing so leaves himself open for a Benoit clothesline, which knocks him down.

Benoit picks Christian up and tries a vertical suplex, but he can't pick Christian up with the bad arm. He switches to a DDT. Benoit covers for two. Benoit tosses Christian into the turnbuckle, but Christian reverses and Benoit hits shoulder-first. Christian gets the Rear Naked Stretch. He covers for two. Christian argues with the referee over the count, and Benoit delivers a dropkick to Christian, who collides with Hebner.

With the referee down, Christian calls Chynna into the ring. She steps in and grabs a tired Benoit, throwing him over her head in a military press. However, Molly enters the ring and kicks Chynna from behind, allowing Benoit to slide down Chynna's back and get a German suplex on her. Christian corners Molly for interfering with her plan, while Chynna rolls out of the ring. Benoit grabs Christian from behind and German suplexes him three more times.

Meanwhile, Chynna returns to the ring with the I-C title belt. Molly grabs a loose strap from behind, and the two women have a tug-of-war over it. Benoit, meanwhile, stands over Christian, waiting for him to get up. Molly yanks the belt away from Chynna as Christian stands up.

Benoit grabs Christian from behind for a dragon suplex, while Molly charges Christian, ready to hit him with the belt. Christian flips over the top of Benoit as Molly charges in, and the end result is Benoit getting hit with the I-C title belt. A stunned Molly gets hit from behind by Chynna with the drop sleeper as Christian grabs a dazed Benoit in the Unprettier. Chynna rolls Molly out of the ring and follows, and Christian covers as the dazed ref comes to. To everyone's dismay, the ref's count makes three at 20:37.

WINNER and NEW Intercontinental Champion: Christian

JR: "NO! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! THIS CAN'T HAPPEN! POOR MOLLY! CHRISTIAN OWNS HER SOUL! DAMN YOU, CHRISTIAN! DAMN YOU!"

As JR goes off on his rant, Christian holds the belt high and hugs Chynna. The two then look at Molly, who looks like she wants to curl up into a ball and die. Christian laughs at her while Chynna does a mocking dance, indicating her humiliation. RAW goes off the air with Molly on the outside, staring at her hands that held the weapon with which she caused Benoit's loss, broken down in tears, as we see over her shoulder the TitanTron image of Christian pointing and laughing.

<<<FIN>>>

Edited May 24, 2004 by Dukes

[The Third Dukes]

- The SmarK RAW Rant for May 10 / 04.

- Live from San Jose, CA.

- Your hosts are JR and DDP.

- Opening interview: RNN. He's still doing this? He talks about a couple of washed-up has-beens, then brings out his guest: Y2J. Jericho immediately beings to talk circles around Orton, first by criticizing what Orton's done with the decor. He then proceeds to call him "Blandy" and mock his tone of voice, including pretending to fall asleep at one point. This may be Orton's bit, but this is RAW IS JERICHO! You tell him! Jericho then expands it to "Blandmaster Flash", which I just KNOW is going to be carried in as a sign by about 30 different marks next week, each one thinking they're totally original. Orton tries to intimidate Jericho physically (since he's CLEARLY not winning a war of words), so Jericho tackles Orton down, then systematically destroys the RNN set. Beautiful segment, as Jericho just absolutely trashed Orton in so many different ways I can't possibly do it justice.

- Molly is helping Benoit train when Eric Bischoff comes by and informs her that Christian's "Be a Diva" stip has been made official. Molly is concerned, but Benoit just knows he's going to win. Uh-huh.

- Opening match (why not): Johnny Jeter v. Nick Mondo. What, did Dreamer get the day off? Slugfest to start, but Mondo misses a blind charge and Jeter gets a back suplex for two. Elbowdrop misses, M.Bison misses, spinkick gets two for Jeter. Mondo with a clothesline, Jackie distracts during the Assault Driver, and Jeter wins with a Victory Roll at 4:12. This is why Mondo and Dreamer are the tag champs. 1/2*

- Jeter allows Jackie to do a dance, and backstage, Christian points out that that's how you be a Diva. I wonder what Christian thinks of the RTC? Anyway, Molly attacks Chynna from behind as Benoit holds Christian off. Molly yanks off Chynna's outfit to get pre-emptive humiliation out of the way. For women who don't want to be thought of as sex objects, there's a lot of sexuality in this program.

- Shawn Michaels v. Sylvain Grenier. DDP basically promises a squash. HBK flips out of a suplex and beats on Grenier. Flying jalapeno and Grenier bails, so HBK gets a plancha on La Résistance. Back in the ring, a bodypress (for which Grenier's facing the wrong way -- idiot) gets two. Grenier with a clothesline and something resembling a kneedrop for two. We go to the headlock. Way to keep things moving, Sylvain. HBK suplexes out and gets the flying elbow, but Kane wanders in for the Sportz Entertainment Finish at 5:00 or so. *1/4 Kane administers the mother of all beatings, as he nails a chokeslam, a Burning Hammer, a diving clothesline, and the sickest Tombstone you've ever seen. Kane uses the turnbuckles to leap into the air on the Tombstone, and HBK sells it by bouncing a foot or two off the canvas. I think Shawn may be legally dead. Oh well, he'll just rise again on the third RAW after this.

- Evolution v. Chris Jericho and Sting. JR seems confused as to why this match is on now. You know, another company couldn't keep their matches straight, and they're out of business. Jericho stops to exchange pleasantries with Rhyno ("You will fear me!" "Why, you carrying a gun?") on the way to the ring. Sting opens with Shane and gets a powerslam. Batista charges, so Sting chops him down, then tosses Shane onto Batista and demands Orton. Orton refuses, and Shane rolls Sting up for two. Sting recovers with a Stinger Splash and tries the Scoop Deathdrop (which I thought he only did in the SD video games), but Orton stops it, allowing Shane to go up with a missile dropkick. Batista sends Sting to the outside, where a double-team makes him YOUR Crow-in-peril. Back in, Sting gets beaten on some more. Orton enters with a chop block and spinning toe hold, using Batista's help. Sting breaks with a rollup for two. Orton kicks his leg out of his leg and uses the ropes to damage it further. Sting starts getting uppity, so Orton kicks the leg to stop him and brings Batista in as we go to break. We return with Sting crawling for the tag while Batista has a leglock on. Batista pulls Sting away and brings Orton in, who beats the knee up some more and gets a figure-four. Using the ropes. And Michael Shane. And Batista. Actually, Michael Shane IS the rope connecting Orton and Batista. Sting fights it for minutes on end, getting several twos before the ref sees it and breaks the chain (Shane does a great pratfall as a result of gravity). Sting reverses, so Orton immediately bails and brings Batista in. Demon bomb is reversed to a catapult, wiping out Orton AND Batista, but now Shane runs in and cuts off the tag. Superkick gets two. Picture Perfect Elbow, and now Orton wants the pin. So of course it gets two. RKO misses as Sting drops Orton on the top rope, hot tag Jericho. Jericho goes nuts on all three guys, hitting the facejam on Orton and the springboard dropkick on Batista. Cute bit: Jericho shakes his leg afterwards and smiles to indicate it's all healed. This leads, of course, to Shane getting a crossbody for two, and it's BONZO GONZO ALONZO. Sting stares at Orton, who bails on his teammates, and stereo submissions lead to synchronized tapping out at 18:07. They're bringing Jericho back slowly, but the Orton/Sting side-issue was the whole focus of what should have been Jericho's big return. **

- Victoria v. Trish Stratus. A pre-match vignette establishes that Victoria has no memory of last week and is a bit cranky. Victoria refuses a handshake and slugs away on Trish. Backdrop and boot rake follow, then a punch to the throat. Trish with the Chick Kick and a rollup for two. Victoria blasts Trish with a clothesline, but going up top proves to backfire as Trish gets the handstand rana. Victoria shoves Trish off of a mounted position, then Vaderizes her in the corner. A very nonchalant toss across the ring leads to a brutal throat attack for two. A slugfest is won by Victoria when she yanks Trish down by the hair. Some choking sets up the Widow's Peak for the win at 5:18. ** Victoria adds a second one post-match. Now, one week may seem a bit quick to reboot a character, but Victoria the Nice Gal clearly didn't work and it's best they treat it as an aberration.

- Theodore Long and the rest of the group have the still-unnamed Tracy Brooks under surveillance, apparently having kidnapped her. They make several comments about how Whitey ain't holdin' them down no more, which actually causes Nowinski to stop in his tracks and think. While this would be a good character development, neither Nowinski nor Long works as a face.

- Main event, Intercontinental Title: Chris Benoit v. Christian. To recap, Chynna Doll accompanies Christian, while Molly Holly accompanies Benoit, and if Benoit loses, Molly has to Be a Diva next week on RAW. Christian attacks early and punches away, but pauses to taunt Molly and gets creamed. Benoit does the ten-punch countalong, with the 10th punch being some CANADIAN VIOLENCE, and Christian bails out. Benoit continues the attack, but Chynna low blows Benoit for a DDT. Molly attacks Chynna to keep it even, allowing Benoit to rally. Back in, Christian gets a mule kick and a clothesline on Benoit. Ground and pound allows Christian to taunt Molly some more, so Molly runs in and distracts the ref. Chynna enters for a double suplex, which gets two. Benoit goes into the turnbuckle hard, and Christian gets a German suplex and armlock. Benoit carries Christian to the ropes until Chynna trips him up. Christian with a shoulderbreaker, and back to the arm as we take a break. We return with Benoit breaking the only way he knows how -- chopping the f*ck out of Christian. Christian gets tripped by Molly and starts to argue, so Benoit gets the rolling Germans. To the top, but Chynna shoves him off for a double KO. Molly kicks Chynna's ass on the outside to a MONSTER pop as Benoit recovers first, but walks into a Crossface. Benoit tries to roll over and gets two, but Christian keeps it on until Benoit gets a vice grip on the ropes. Christian works the arm some more, but Benoit lariats Christian down and tries a vertical suplex, which fails because his arm is dead. DDT gets two, since you only need one arm for that. Benoit goes shoulder-first into the turnbuckle, and Christian gets the Rear Naked Stretch for two. Christian argues the count, so Benoit dropkicks him... straight into the ref. Dammit, why does Hebner always get bumped at the wrong time? Chynna enters and military presses Benoit, but Molly tips the tower over and Benoit gets a German on her, then three more on Christian for good measure. Chynna enters with the belt, and the women fight over it. Benoit sets Christian up for a dragon suplex as Molly secures the belt. What follows is one of the most beautifully choreographed things I've seen: Christian flips out of the suplex as Molly goes to hit him with the belt, leaving Benoit to take the shot and Christian standing behind him, allowing Christian to turn it into the Unprettier in one motion. Chynna disposes of Molly, and Hebner revives for the pin and the title change at 20:37. Crowd boos the finish out of the building, but unlike at WMXX, this is GOOD heat. This match, meanwhile, absolutely rocked on many levels, with phat psychology and a red-hot crowd, and the run-ins meant something was always going on and fit within the context of the match. ****1/4 That's probably too high for the match, but dammit, nothing does my heart better than watching two Canadians beat the everliving crap out of each other.

The Bottom Line:

BOOYAH! Not only does the main event mean an automatic thumbs-up, but we have some very good setups for down the road. Orton/Sting is getting hotter than ever, and with Christian riding a wave of heel heat not even I can believe, you know he's headed to the history books. And HBK got his ass kicked, which is always nice.

Until next week, BE A DIVA!

*****

May 12, 2004

WO.com

* A lot of RAW was re-arranged at the last second. The I-C title match and Evolution match were switched because management was surprised by the reaction to Kane's decimation of Shawn Michaels and wanted to keep the crowd from getting too down. No one was upset by the move, although many feel that the McMahons are milking Molly's feel-good story at the expense of the rest of their roster.

* Speaking of which, the storyline's next few weeks have been approved -- and in some cases written -- by Molly personally. The general feeling of the writing staff is that it should be an allegory for her own personal struggles, with Christian representing a sort of internal doubt. A source backstage said, "Apparently they're trying to make the whole thing an inspirational story for women -- kind of an apology for all these years. It would mean more if they weren't always calling Playboy."

* The Chavo Guerreros are said to be a new look and a fresher approach to Ring of Honor. While Rob Feinstein and Gabe Sapolsky seemed intent on pushing younger people before they were ready (such as Special K), the fed now has a more old-school feel, if such a thing is possible. Plus, the last few weeks have led to a renewed spirit with everyone in the locker room. "We're all about proving ourselves all over again now," AJ Styles said. "The new management is using a clean slate approach, and it's really causing a lot of people to re-evaluate their own talent level."

* Matt Bloom has been given permission to use the name "A-Train" on the independent circuit. Bloom walked out on his WWE contract after an accident during a Velocity taping which left Brandon Robinson temporarily paralyzed. Strangely, Chavo Guerrero and RoH are interested in the hirsute power wrestler, feeling it would give the promotion a monster heel it lacked.

* Chris Harris' negotiations with NWATNA have soured. It now appears he will become a free agent, and the WWE is very interested in adding him to their roster. Some NWA insiders, however, feel the move would be detrimental to Harris' career, as thus far he is unproven when not in the tag ranks with James Storm. Further, although a cruiserweight, Harris would be lost on SmackDown! as the CW title is being de-emphasized during Ron Killings' current reign, and RAW does not seem to fit his strengths. He may re-sign with NWATNA after all, if only because it's the best option.

* WWE creative acknowledges that the Nathan/Taker conflict from last week's SmackDown! was lifted from their own archives. Numerous people noted the similarities between the segment and Taker's original face turn in 1991. WWE has confirmed that they were hoping to capture some of the same magic and draw comparisons between Nathan Jones and Jake "the Snake" Roberts, a participant in the original angle on Saturday Night's Main Event. "We figured it was safe. Corny told us it was more than seven years old, so no one would remember it anyway," said one creative team member.

* Despite a series of rumors, The Rock will NOT be the mystery partner at Judgment Day. If he were to appear, WWE would advertise it heavily.

* Shawn Michaels is only expected to miss a few weeks after the attack. He is not hurt, but will sell the injury and get time to return to 100% condition.

*****

May 13, 2004

WWE.com

Three days to go until the next WWE Pay-Per-View, and that means it's time for one red-hot SmackDown!, only on UPN!

Rowdy Roddy Piper, always one to stir the pot, has decided he will make a special main event tonight in honor of the show being in Reno, NV. He will make a wildcard elimination 10-man tag match! In this match, teammates and opponents will be chosen completely at random, and anyone could end up with anybody!

Eddie Guerrero and Brock Lesnar could be teammates. Billy Kidman could be forced to wrestle Rey Misterio. The Right to Censor could be divided 2 against 2. Hurricane might be on a team with Bull Buchanan. Heck, Undertaker and Nathan Jones might have to co-exist! We might even see Nidia, Torrie, or Shannon Ward enter the ring. We don't know!

We do know that the Hot Rod loves controversy, and after the show RAW put out, he's going to have to up the ante if he wants to remain the topic of discussion heading into his banner weekend at Judgment Day! Will this match be enough, or will he have to dig even deeper? Tune in tonight at 8 / 7 Central on UPN to Smack Your TV and find out!

[The Third Dukes]

WWE SmackDown!

"LIVE" from Reno, NV

May "13", 2004

We start with clips of the previous week, as Nathan Jones waits behind a curtain but is intercepted by Undertaker. Kurt Angle disrupts the main event, getting shots in on both of his Judgment Day opponents before leaving, as Matt Hardy gets a pin on Rob Van Dam. Hurricane has arrived on SmackDown!, and we see his victory over Jamie Noble and Noble's subsequent blowup at Nidia. We also notice Road Dogg's and Paul London's returns, as they even the scores in feuds.

I'M WILLING TO GAMBLE THAT THERE'S A LOT OF PYRO BEING USED as we are live from Little Vegas, aka Reno, Nevada. Sign in the crowd: "RTC better Stand Back!"

Cole: "Three days away from one of the biggest nights on the calendar, and just when you thought we had all the answers, Roddy Piper changes the questions! Welcome to SmackDown! I'm Michael Cole alongside James E. Cornette, and Corny, the Hot Rod has promised a 10-man Wild Card elimination match but he's not letting us know who's in it!"

Cornette: "That's right, Cole, only the wrestlers involved are aware of who is in the main event, and all of them have been sworn to secrecy with the penalty of forfieture of their Judgment Day match, so it look like we'll all be in the dark until later tonight!"

Intros begin for the first match.

Cole: "Well, we are off and running here, and it looks like our first match is going to figure a group of guys that... well, they've made a lot of enemies over their short stay here on SmackDown!"

Cornette: "Certainly enough, the Right to Censor has gotten the short of end of quite a few ideas from GM Roddy Piper, but you'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who feels any sympathy for them, given their overbearing agenda to clean up the WWE of what they perceive as a problem, which, honestly, usually isn't!"

Cole: "And tonight they will be facing their Judgment Day opponents in six-man tag team action, as Steven Richards appears to be ready to join us for commentary on this match. Steven, how are you?"

Steven: "That's Mr. Richards to you, Mr. Cole. I am a representative of an official organization of righteousness, and I will be treated with respect."

Bull Buchanan, Sean Morley, and Mark Henry vs. Nova, Paul London, and the Hurricane

All six men brawl in the center of the ring to start, and the RTC gets the early advantage. Bull is on Hurricane, Morley on London, Henry on Nova. London is the first to get a reversal, due largely to his face protector, and he mounts Morley in the corner and punches away. Nova tosses Henry at London/Morley, but London (given warning) moonsaults out of the way and Henry flattens Morley in the corner.

Hurricane whips Bull into a double superkick from Nova/London, and Hurricane goes up top with a superfly splash for two. Nova adds a lightning legdrop, but on his attempt to send Bull into the corner, Bull bounces off the top turnbuckle with a springboard lariat. Bull tags Morley in, and Morley gets his running knee strikes on Nova, followed by a Russian legsweep. Morley slams down Nova and covers, getting two.

Henry enters the ring and tosses Nova into the corner. He gets a head of steam and avalanches Nova, then picks him up with a Samoan drop. Bull tags in, and Henry gorilla presses Nova onto Bull's extended knee for a gutbuster. Bull covers for two. Bull picks Nova up and delivers a shoulderbreaker. He goes to the top, but the diving legdrop finds nothing but air. Both men stagger up, and Nova hits the Spin Doctor on Bull. Henry and London tag in, and London punches away on Henry, knocking him down with a discus punch.

London gets a double clothesline on Morley and Bull, knocking them from the apron, then returns and hits a backflip dropkick on Henry, landing on his feet. He connects with a senton for two before Morley saves. Morley pounds away on London, but as he does, Hurricane hits Henry with the Shining Wizard. Both men are down as the ring clears, so Bull tosses Henry onto London. The count gets two.

Henry tries to lift London up in a torture rack, but London swings out onto his feet. London goes for the Contra Code, but Henry tosses him groin-first into the post. Henry splashes London for two. Morley comes in via the top rope, but the Moral High Ground misses. Hurricane is tagged in, and Morley gets nailed with chops in the corner.

A cross-corner whip is met with a flying clothesline to knock Morley down. Hurricane covers, but Bull saves and everyone enters the ring. In the chaos, Morley picks Nova up for a powerslam, but London dropkicks both men out of the ring and follows with a pescado. In the ring, Hurricane goes for the Hurri-chokeslam on Henry (riiiiight), but Bull boots Hurricane down.

Nova returns via the top rope with a missile dropkick. He picks Bull up and lands the Kryptonite Krunch, but Morley re-enters and nails the Moral High Ground onto the pile. Morley covers Nova, and the referee counts it as the three at 11:06.

WINNERS: Right to Censor

Cole: "And I guess it was a fair result, as the Right to Censor pick the win and have the momentum entering Judgment Day. Well, Mr. Richards, thank you for coming here."

Steven: "The pleasure is all yours. Remember, Mr. Cole, fight the good fight for your own good."

Cole: "All right. See you Sunday at Judgment Day. This Sunday, of course..."

Cornette: "Is he gone?"

Cole: "I think so."

Cornette: "Good, I was beginnin' to think I'd need to hit the bathroom and purge myself of all his crap."

Cole: "Careful, Corny. He's got friends. Still to come tonight, folks, we have a huge 10-man main event. Who's siding with whom, and who will be in the ring? We'll find out when you do!"

***COMMERCIAL***

And now, the Boot of the Week, brought to you by Lugz: from last week, Nidia distracts Noble and Hurricane gets the victory, leading to Noble threatening to boot Nidia from his presence. Or something.

We head backstage, where already a war of words has begun between Billy Gunn and Jamie Noble.

Noble: "Where the hell have you been when I needed ya? How come yer always causin' us to lose anyway?"

Gunn: "Hey, it's an accident! I'm not trying to do anything wrong -- it just happens."

Noble: "The hell it does. You gotta lotta nerve tryin' to screw me like this. I'm so mad I oughta slap you right in that purty face o' yours!"

Gunn: "Oh really? Well, go ahead, if it makes you feel better."

Noble: "Nah, not now. We gonna do this at Judgment Day."

Nidia: "Wait, Jamie, wait... we don't have to fight..."

Noble: "Don't have to? Hell, you're as bad as he is! I'm not the Croozer champ cuz o' you! Whose side are you on, anyway?"

Nidia: "No one's! Honest! I just want the two of you to get along!"

Noble: "Yoo ain't on mah side, now quit yer lyin!"

Nidia: "I swear it's true!"

Noble: "Is it now? Well, in that case, you git yerself a little stripey shirt and go be a referee, and we'll see just how fair yoo are on Sundey. Now git outta mah way!"

Noble storms off. Gunn and Nidia stare at each other in confusion. Gunn shrugs.

Gunn: "Hell, why not? If it'll prove anything to him, we'll do it."

We go back to commentary at ringside as intros begin for the next match.

Cole: "Well, Jim, it looks like we have another match at Judgment Day, and I can't say this one is a surprise here. Jamie Noble has been somewhat paranoid ever since his loss just after WrestleMania, and now he's gotta find out whose side everyone's on."

Cornette: "Paranoia's a dangerous thing, Michael Cole, and it's gotta be cloudin' Jamie Noble's judgment right about now. But maybe, just maybe, he's justified... or maybe he's gonna snap for no reason. Right now, Michael, I don't know. I'm not a mind reader!"

Cole: "Folks, this next match is as a result of last week, when this man Shannon Moore was pinned in a tag title match, and now he wants a chance to prove himself one-on-one. It looks like Billy Kidman's stepping up to the plate, and Corny, could that be a clue about the main event?"

Cornette: "Entirely possible, Michael. When I was in WCW, we had somethin' called a BattleBowl that I've been pushing Roddy to do sometime, and it was basically a bunch of random tag matches. I had to prep my guys for whoever they were facing based on who was already out of the hopper, so I had a lot of prep to do, and that's what's goin' on here. Right now, I'd be tellin' my guys to think about Misterio, cuz the chances just went up that he's in the big one."

Shannon Moore vs. Billy Kidman

They lock up. Moore goes behind Kidman and gets a wristlock, but Kidman moves to the ropes and slides under them, sending Moore to the outside. Kidman runs the ropes as Moore gets onto the apron. Kidman dives as Moore is bent over to enter, and Kidman gets a sunset flip bomb on Moore to the outside. Kidman grabs Moore and tosses him back in.

In the ring, Kidman sends Moore into the ropes and tries a dropkick, but Moore holds onto the ropes. Moore does a jacknife pin on Kidman, getting two. Moore picks Kidman up and whips him into the ropes. Moore hits the opposite side and gets a swingaround bulldog on Kidman. He covers for two. Moore picks Kidman up and nails him with taped fists. Kidman falls into the corner, so Moore charges in and gets a monkey flip.

Kidman sits up, straight into a Moore dropkick. Moore covers for two. Moore lifts Kidman up and kicks him in the gut, then grabs his head for a Twist of Fate. Kidman backdrops Moore out of it. Moore staggers into the corner, and Kidman rolls him up from behind for two.

Kidman dropkicks Moore back into the corner and mounts him, hitting ten punches and a monkey flip. Moore lands on his feet on the monkey flip and gets a back elbow on Kidman as he stands up. Moore gets a suplex for two as we take a break.

***COMMERCIAL***

Moore chokes Kidman against the ropes. He releases at four, running the ropes and spearing Kidman. Kidman slumps down, and Moore covers for two. Moore picks Kidman up and sends him into the ropes, getting a rana on the way out. Moore goes to the top, holds up the V1 signal, and dives off with a legdrop. He covers for two.

Moore lifts Kidman up and places him on the top rope. He follows up, looking for a Frankensteiner, but Kidman is quick to react, reversing it to a BK Bomb on the way down for a double KO. Kidman is up first, and as Moore gets up, Kidman hits him with a DDT. Kidman picks Moore up and sends him into the ropes, but Moore ducks an elbowsmash.

Moore ducks a clothesline. Moore dives at Kidman with a crossbody, only to be caught and powerslammed. Kidman drags Moore to the corner and climbs, but Moore kips up just as Kidman reaches the top. Moore follows Kidman up and gets a Frankensteiner. Moore covers for two. Moore goes back to the top rope as Kidman slowly stands up, and he hits corkscrew bodypress for two. Kidman charges Moore as both men get up, but Moore pulls the ropes down and Kidman flies out.

Kidman slowly gets up as Moore runs the ropes and hits a tope on Kidman. Back in the ring, Moore covers for two. Moore tries for a Twist of Fate, only to have it reversed as Moore turns around into a back suplex. Moore lands on his feet and tries a backslide, but Kidman flips over it, punches Moore to spin him around, and goes for the Kid Krusher.

Moore shoves him off into the ropes, but on the rebound, Kidman hits a handspring into a Samurai Driver. Kidman heads to the top rope, steadies himself, and dives off with the Shooting Star Press on Moore. He covers, and that'll get the three at 14:08.

WINNER: Billy Kidman

Cole: "And Billy Kidman gets all the momentum entering Judgment Day with a solid win over Shannon Moore!"

Cornette: "Kidman is flying high right now, but... oh, dammit, what does HE want?"

"He", it goes without saying, is Paul Heyman, who has emerged on the stage, applauding.

Heyman: "Very nice, Billy. Very, very nice. However, you're going to have to do a lot more than that on Sunday. You see, Kidman, I've been watching you. Yes, every little move you make, I've scouted and thought of a counter to. You know, it's funny; I know your style so well that... it's almost like I can get inside your head and discover who you really are -- like I know the real you no one else does. And Kidman, don't imagine I'm not relishing the chance to share every last detail of information with my proteges, Ultimo Dragon and Tajiri. When Judgment Day comes around, we'll know you better than you know yourself. And Kidman, that is why we will walk out once again as the official greatest tag team in the WWE. You have three days to enjoy that belt; after that, polish it up and send it to us."

Cole: "Paul Heyman sounds extremely confident in Team JAPAN's abilities, Corny."

Cornette: "Of course he does; he's always counting his chickens before they hatch."

Cole: "Well, folks, we're still trying to figure out who's in the ten-man main event, so stay tuned! It's gonna be a barnburner!"

***COMMERCIAL***

John Hennigan stands in the ring.

Hennigan: "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time, accompanied by Shannon 'Psycho' Ward, Nathan Jones!"

The didgeridoo music plays as Nathan Jones walks with purpose to the ring. Shannon Ward stands in front of him, smiling and waving at the camera while wearing a shirt that says "Sexier Than Torrie". Nathan steps over the top rope and enters the ring.

Hennigan: "Nathan, this Sunday at Judgment Day, you and Shannon Ward will face off against the Undertaker and Torrie Wilson. Are you prepared to face one of the most decorated veterans in the WWE?"

Ward: "Nuh-uh-uh..."

Ward points at Hennigan. Nathan smiles.

Nathan: "You know what, mate? Not yet I'm not. But I know what I gotta do to be ready."

With that, Nathan coldcocks Hennigan as Ward starts making the "ring the bell" motion. Surprisingly, it works.

Nathan Jones vs. John Hennigan

Jones picks Hennigan up and punches him in the gut to double him over. He then nails Hennigan in the back of the head with a clenched fist. Jones waits for Hennigan to stand up, then boots him in the face, which sends Hennigan back into the corner. Jones boxes Hennigan's ears, dropping him to the mat. Jones pulls Hennigan up and lands a right cross, flooring Hennigan. He covers, but picks him up at two. Jones sends Hennigan into the ropes and hits a rabbit punch, doubling Hennigan over. Jones takes a couple steps back and Punts Hennigan in the face. He stands over him with one foot, and Ward counts the three at 2:21.

WINNER: Nathan Jones

Jones smiles and stands over Hennigan, then picks him up and sets him in the corner. He heads outside and grabs a chair from ringside, climbing back into the ring. He winds up, but as always, the lights go out. A single gong is heard. The revving of a motorcycle follows it. Now the lights come back on, and Nathan has headed outside, chair in hand, ready to confront what has to be Undertaker. Taker emerges on his bike, revving it again at the top of the stage. He zooms to the ring, with Nathan in his way, both men daring the other to go through with it. Finally, Nathan sidesteps the bike and tries to hit Taker with the chair, but he misses. Taker gets off the bike and slugs away on Nathan. The two men punch it out on the floor before Ward sneaks up behind Taker and taps him on the back. Taker turns around, ready to swing, but Ward just stands there and waves. This allows Nathan to take control temporarily. Nathan throws Taker into the ring and continues slugging away while Ward screams and laughs in delight. However, that doesn't last long as Torrie comes to the ring and pounces on Ward. Referees and security flood the ring and face a dilemma: do we try to break up the men and risk getting killed by Nathan and Taker, or try to break up the women and risk getting killed by the audience? Answer: both, and they fail miserably as the war rages out of control all the way up to the commercial break.

***COMMERCIAL***

Cole: "Man, what a war this was, Corny. That sick Nathan Jones was about to level John Hennigan with a chair when we saw one of the damnedest things I've ever seen."

Cornette: "Damn right, Michael Cole, it's pretty obvious that Nathan and Undertaker are a pair of sick sons of guns that wanna get in each other's heads, and right now it ain't working very well, but they're gonna keep right on trying."

Cole: "And then, of course, after that, Torrie Wilson risked her own neck to come out and deal with Shannon Ward. The hatred here -- especially with Torrie -- is absolutely through the roof, James."

Cornette: "There's no doubt about that, Cole."

Intros begin for the next match.

Cole: "Well, we have another match to provide you with, as it appears one-half of the World's Greatest Tag Team is going at it here, and we've been told he will be facing a man who will be on the opposite team from his at Judgment Day, that being the Cruiserweight champion, Ron Killings."

Cornette: "Now, like I said before, this may be a clue to the ten-man. We saw Kidman going solo earlier, and now Shelton Benjamin is without his tag team partner. Ya gotta think Charlie Haas is in the match later tonight."

Shelton Benjamin vs. Ron Killings

Killings dives over the top rope to intercept Shelton on the way out. Killings punches away on Shelton, rolling him into the ring. Killings backs Shelton into the corner and punches away, but Shelton grabs a punch and gets an armdrag out of it. He switches it up to an armbar, but Killings fights to his feet and tries to turn it over. Shelton sweeps out Killings' leg, winning the impromptu test of strength, and switching to a leglock.

Killings works his way to his foot and connects with an enzuigiri on Shelton to slow him down. Killings whips Shelton into the ropes as Eric Angle marches to ringside. Killings gets a back drop, then runs the ropes to dropkick Shelton, but Eric catches his foot. Killings turns around and drags Eric into the ring, but this starts a double-team. Road Dogg emerges from the back to even the sides, and it's a huge mess.

Cole: "This has totally broken down, folks! Why isn't the referee stopping it?"

Cornette: "No kidding, the Kru are using double-teaming! They've cleared the ring!"

Cole: "Folks, this is a strange development, but... hang on..."

Referee Nick Patrick calls Michael Cole off the headset. The two begin a discussion, then Patrick turns to Tony Chimel and barks instructions.

Chimel: "Ladies and gentlemen, due to outside interference, this match has been changed. It is now a tag team match with Shelton Benjamin and Eric Angle against Ron Killings and the Road Dogg!"

Cornette: "Is that your lamebrained idea, Cole?"

Cole: "Better than a no contest."

Eric and Shelton return to the ring, and the teams pair off (Eric/Dogg, Shelton/Killings). Shelton and Eric whip the Kru together, but they do-si-do and return to sender with clotheslines. Killings and Shelton leave the ring as Dogg punches away on Eric, setting up the jump, jive, and wail punch. Dogg bounces off the ropes for the shaky-legs kneedrop, but Eric rolls away. Eric catches Dogg in a belly-to-belly suplex and tags in Shelton. Shelton enters, backing Dogg into the corner.

He sends him across the ring, hitting a Stinger splash on the way in. Dogg falls to the mat, and Shelton climbs to the top rope. He waits for Dogg to get up and hits a flying clothesline, covering for two. Eric tags in, holding Dogg prone on the ropes. Shelton hits the leapfrog choke on Dogg, and Eric covers for two. Eric grabs Dogg in a butterfly position and flips him over in a suplex. He covers for two. Eric goes up top, but Dogg is ready and grabs him from behind in a back suplex.

Both men are down, and Shelton and Killings return to the ring. Killings chops away on Shelton, backing him into the ropes and hitting a flying elbowsmash on the way out. Eric returns to the ring, only to get clotheslined. Killings bounces back and hits Shelton with a crossbody for two. Killings runs the ropes and tries a sunset flip, but Eric drops a fist on Killings' face, allowing Shelton to drop down for two.

Dogg enters to take care of Eric, and those two brawl to the back, leaving us where we started. Killings wins a slugfest with Shelton, then bounces off the ropes, only to run into an overhead suplex. Shelton whips Killings into the corner, following in with a forearm smash. He dumps Killings on the ground and heads to the top, connecting with the 450 splash. He covers, and that gets the three at a total wrestling time of 11:01.

WINNER(S): Shelton Benjamin (and Eric Angle)

Cole: "After a wild turn of events, Shelton Benjamin emerges victorious, and you gotta think Team Angle has a huge advantage entering Judgment Day!"

Cornette: "That's right, and you notice he pinned Ron Killings, as the match ended like it started, despite your best intentions, Cole."

Cole (ignoring him): "Folks, when we come back, Roddy Piper will let us know about the huge 10-man main event! We're still not sure who's in it, but with Piper involved, you know it'll be a barnburner!"

***COMMERCIAL***

Cole: "As Roddy Piper is on his way from the office to the ring, we have just enough time to give you one last look at Judgment Day, this Sunday on Pay-Per-View! Call your cable company or satellite provider now!"

Here we go, to the tune of the official song of Judgment Day... "All Downhill from Here" by New Found Glory.

You're hiding something (Brock beats RVD up on the outside)

'cause it's burning through your eyes (Brock yells into the camera)

I try to get it out (Eddie hits the frog splash on Matt Hardy)

But all I hear from you are lies (Kurt Angle attacks Brock on the outside)

And I can tell (Angle and Brock double-team Eddie)

You're going through the motions (Kurt and Eric twirling in unison)

I figured you (Team Angle reunites)

Were acting out your part (Ron Killings holds the CW title aloft)

Once again (Road Dogg drops the knee)

We're playing off emotion (Konnan clotheslines Brock down)

Which one of us will burn until the end? (Killings dodges Nidia's interference)

Catalyst (Noble looks shocked)

You insist to pull me down (Gunn hits a Fame-asser on Noble by mistake)

You contradict the fact (The two men argue)

That you still want me around (Nidia is near tears on the outside)

And it's all downhill from here (Ultimo Dragon pins Jamie Noble)

It's all downhill from here (Tajiri kicks Rey Misterio)

Your good intentions (Kidman and Tajiri shake hands)

Slowly turn to bitterness (Heyman goes ballistic)

Reoccurring episodes (Kidman grabs the belts at WrestleMania)

With each and every kiss (Kidman kisses Torrie)

Let's go! (Nathan smashes Torrie with a chairshot)

And I can tell (Nathan stands in front of Ayers Rock)

That you're going through the motions (An irate Kidman tackles Nathan)

I figured you (The lights go out)

Were acting out the part (Taker zooms down on his cycle)

Once again (Taker powerbombs Doug Basham)

We're playing off emotion (Torrie cowers in fear)

Which one of us will burn until the end? (Ward laughs into the camera)

Catalyst (Torrie cheers as Kidman covers Moore earlier tonight)

You insist to pull me down (Moore and Matt Hardy attack RVD)

You contradict the fact (Van Dam dives onto Bubba Rogers)

That you still want me around (Matt rolls up RVD)

And it's all downhill from here (RVD and Nova clear house of Mattitude)

It's all downhill from here (RTC gangs up on Nova)

And I can't believe (Steven superkicks Nova in a tag match)

You pulled it off again (London smashes his faceplate into Richards)

Or notice till it all sets in (Richards superkicks Piper)

You deny it till you're at your bitter end (Henry is frog splashed by Eddie)

And I can tell (Piper yells at Richards)

That you're going through the motions (Bull pins Nova)

I figured you (Henry crushes London)

Were acting out the part (Richards on the mic)

Once again (Nova and Edge double-team Morley)

We're playing off emotion (sign in crowd: RTC SUCKS)

Which one of us will burn until the end? (Bull powerbombs Edge on the floor)

Catalyst (Hurricane charges the ring)

You insist to pull me down (Bull hits a springboard lariat)

You contradict the fact (Hurricane nails Noble with a Shining Wizard)

That you still want me around (Bull and Hurricane slug it out earlier tonight)

And it's all downhill from here (Bull covers Nova with one foot)

It's all downhill from here (Bull is given a senton by Eddie)

(We now show the motion graphics of each match)

And you keep pulling me down (Eddie Guerrero vs. Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle)

Pulling me down, pulling me down! (Rob Van Dam vs. Matt Hardy)

You contradict the fact (3 Live Crew vs. Team Angle)

That you still want me around (Team Japan vs. Kidman/Rey, ladder match)

And it's all downhill (Taker/Torrie vs. Nathan/Ward)

From here (Nova/London/mystery vs. Steven/Morley/Henry)

It's all downhill (Hurricane vs. Bull Buchanan)

From here (Jamie Noble vs. Billy Gunn, Nidia as referee)

We go to the ring, where Piper's music is playing and he stands with a microphone in one hand and a notecard in the other.

Piper: "All right, Reno! This is the moment you've waited for! It's the ten man, wildcard elimination match! Now, I'm the only guy who knows just what the teams are, but the people who are in the match... they know who they are, and they've agreed to go all-in. So boys, come on out and ante up!"

"Medal" plays as Kurt Angle and Charlie Haas march to the ring, wearing matching velour tracksuits. Kurt's pyro goes off. They enter the ring and twirl in unison.

"Viva Guerrero!" plays as Eddie Guerrero emerges from the back, WWE title around his waist. He rolls into the ring and stares down Kurt and Haas, not trusting them.

"One of a Kind" starts as Rob Van Dam enters the arena proper, hitting the thumb pose. He rolls into the ring and spin-jumps around to the crowd, posing with the thumbs one more time.

"Here Comes the Pain" plays as Brock Lesnar emerges from the back, jogging in place. He jumps onto the apron, setting off his pyro, and walks into the ring, jogging again.

The silhouette of the mask appears on the TitanTron as Rey Misterio pops up from beneath the stage. He carries the Tag Title over his shoulder as he walks to the ring, standing next to Eddie.

Oriental music is piped in over the PA as Paul Heyman leads Team JAPAN to the ring. Tajiri stalks ahead, while Ultimo hits his pose and sets off spurts of flame. Both men enter the ring as Heyman waits on the outside, talking trash to Rey.

The TitanTron shows a loading screen at 10, 30, 70, and 100%. Matt Hardy walks out from the back, holding the V1 sign aloft, as we learn that Matt doesn't fear Judgment Day, and Matt is proud to be a US citizen. Matt rolls into the ring and hits his V1 pose on the second turnbuckle before shouting words at RVD.

"Ashes to Ashes" plays as Konnan walks in from the back. He looks around slyly before entering the ring, circling it and yelling "Arriba La Raza" at all four sides.

All ten men meet in the center of the ring as Piper starts pointing to various corners. Some people -- notably Haas and Heyman on the outside -- are livid, while some -- such as Kurt and Matt -- are smiling broadly.

***COMMERCIAL***

Wild Card 10-man elimination match: Eddie Guerrero, Brock Lesnar, Charlie Haas, Rob Van Dam, and Tajiri vs. Kurt Angle, Konnan, Matt Hardy, Ultimo Dragon, and Rey Misterio

Both teams talk strategy as the announcers play up the matchups. Eventually, Brock and Rey start it off. Rey charges Brock, who grabs him and flings him halfway across the ring. Rey quickly bounces back up and tries a rana on Brock, but Brock catches him again. Before anything can come of it, Ultimo kicks Brock in the back of the knee, allowing Rey to complete the rana. Rey quickly tags in Kurt, but Brock brings in Haas.

Haas and Kurt stare uneasily at each other as they lock up. Kurt gets a double-leg takedown and tries to bridge to a pinning predicament, but Haas rolls through it and grabs Kurt's arm, trying a half-nelson. Kurt squirms free and gets in the advantage position on Haas, who rolls Kurt underneath him, only to have Kurt reverse that to a leglock and pinfall combo for one before Haas rolls enough to get his shoulder up. Both men stand up, and Ultimo and Tajiri are brought in.

Heyman yells for them to tag out, but they lock up. Tajiri tries a wristlock, but Ultimo flips out and goes for an armdrag, but Tajiri lands on his feet and tries a spinkick, but Ultimo ducks. Tajiri lands on his feet while Ultimo goes for a headstand, so Tajiri tries a baseball slide, but Ultimo flips onto his feet. Now RVD and Konnan enter the ring.

Konnan punches away at RVD, but a kick is caught and RVD hits the stepover enzuigiri. Konnan is back up, only to get caught with an armdrag. Konnan charges again, and RVD dropkicks him to the outside. Haas, Kurt, and Brock find Konnan and a 3-on-1 ensues, but Tajiri breaks that up with a baseball slide.

As everyone gets up, Matt dives on the pile from the guardrail. When they get up, Ultimo heads to the apron and hits the Asai moonsault onto the pile. As they recover from that, Eddie springboards onto everyone with a tope. As everyone regains their footing, Rey runs the ropes, gets a boost from RVD, and scores a corkscrew senton on everybody. As they slowly stand up, RVD launches himself with a 450 plancha.

Konnan and Haas are the first ones to enter the ring after this melee, and Konnan sends Haas into the turnbuckle. He charges in with a rolling lariat that misses, and Haas rolls him up from behind (with his feet on the ropes) for the first elimination at 9:08.

Haas gets dropkicked from behind by Ultimo, landing him in the ropes. Rey re-enters with the 6-1-9. He springboards up with the West Coast Hop to re-even the sides at 10:11.

Tajiri enters the ring and kicks Rey down from behind, backing him into the turnbuckle. He then hooks the Tarantula on Rey, holding it for four seconds before letting go at the ref's behest. Tajiri brings in RVD, who stomps on Rey before picking him up and sending him into the turnbuckle. RVD hits two shoulder thrusts, backflips, and misses the third as Rey gets out of the way.

Rey scoots to the top rope as RVD looks around, and Rey gets a dragonrana on RVD. Kurt is tagged in, and he goes nuts on RVD with punches. RVD is sent into the ropes, and on the way out he's hit with an overhead suplex. Kurt pulls the straps down, and as RVD staggers up, Kurt hits the Angle Slam. He covers, and the US champ is out at 13:11.

Tajiri enters the ring and tries a superkick, but Kurt catches his foot and applies the Angle Lock. Ultimo enters to save Tajiri from his teammate, but Matt stops him. No matter, because Brock gets a release German suplex on Kurt to end the hold. Tajiri limps to his feet, and Kurt clotheslines him back down before tagging in Matt. Matt sends Tajiri into the ropes. Tajiri handsprings out, but is caught by Matt in a German suplex.

Matt tosses Tajiri into the turnbuckle and kicks him in the gut. He grabs Tajiri and hollers to the crowd, but Eddie dropkicks Matt and Tajiri tosses him into the turnbuckle and the Tree of Woe. Tajiri gets a running start and baseball slides in, but Matt pulls himself up and Tajiri crotches himself. Matt pulls a wounded Tajiri out of the corner and goes to the top rope. He yells, drops the leg, and the cover makes it 4-on-2 at 16:41 as we take a break.

***COMMERCIAL***

Eddie floors Ultimo with a dropkick as we see a split-screen of Team Angle assaulting Konnan backstage. Eddie heads to the apron and slingshots in with a senton for two. Ultimo reverses Eddie's whip into the corner, though, and charges in with a dropkick. Ultimo dashes to the top rope, then dives off, looking for the Asai DDT. Eddie ducks, but Ultimo lands on his feet. Eddie reaches behind him with a jawbreaker to Ultimo, then bounces off the ropes and scores a satellite headscissor takedown. He quickly dashes over and puts La Majistral on Ultimo, rolling him over for the three-count at 20:37.

Kurt enters the ring, but Eddie tags in Brock. Kurt tries a fireman's carry on Brock, but Brock clubs Kurt in the back. Brock sends Kurt into the ropes and hits him with a Steinerline on the way out. Brock stomps on Kurt, then picks him up in a gutwrench suplex. Brock smiles at Kurt, but the pause allows Rey time to go to the top and hit a swinging rana to Brock. Kurt gets up and scores a German suplex on Brock. He rolls through with it and connects with a second German suplex. He rolls through again, this time hitting a release German suplex on Brock.

Kurt goes to the top rope, but the moonsault hits Brock's knees, leading to a double KO. Rey and Eddie both tag in, and Rey scores an immediate crossbody on Eddie for two. Rey dropkicks Eddie twice, the second one slumping him in the corner. Rey charges in with the Broncobuster, but Eddie gets hit foot up. With Rey incapacitated, Eddie sets him on the top turnbuckle and grabs his arms. He steps forward and drops Rey with Splash Mountain (an Edge off the turnbuckle), and the sides are all even again at 25:11.

Kurt enters the ring and clotheslines Eddie down. He backs Eddie into his corner and tags in Matt. The two send Eddie into the ropes and hit him with a double backdrop on the way out. Matt covers for two. Matt kicks Eddie in the gut and delivers a gutwrench suplex. Matt covers again, but again it's two. Kurt tags in, and he stands behind Eddie, who backs into a crossface chickenwing. Eddie falls into the ropes, and Kurt is forced to break. Kurt spins Eddie around and tries the Angle Slam, but Eddie lands on his feet. Kurt instead gets an overhead suplex on Eddie. Kurt tags Matt back in, placing Eddie on the top rope. Matt follows him up and superplexes Eddie to the mat, but Eddie floats back over and cradles Matt. It gets a surprise three count at 28:36.

Kurt charges in, unfazed, and pounds away on Eddie. He whips Eddie into the ropes and nails him with an overhead suplex on the way out. Kurt calls out to the crowd, then grabs Eddie's ankle for an Angle Lock. Eddie kicks Kurt away, but as Eddie stands up, Kurt gets him with a release German suplex. Kurt covers for two. Kurt picks Eddie up and tries for another German suplex, but Eddie mule kicks him. Kurt runs the ropes and charges, but Eddie dropkicks him in full stride for a double KO. Kurt pulls himself up, while Eddie brings Brock in.

Brock catches Kurt in an overhead suplex right away. Kurt stands up, dazed, so Brock charges in and Steinerlines him, causing Kurt to flip through it. Brock picks Kurt up on his shoulders, dropping him with the F-5. Eddie climbs to the top rope and frog splashes Kurt for good measure, and Brock covers to end the match at 32:10.

SURVIVORS: Eddie Guerrero and Brock Lesnar

Eddie and Brock celebrate in the ring, but it isn't for long as Brock hits Eddie with a Steinerline. With Eddie down, Brock heads to the outside to get the WWE Title belt. He waits as Eddie staggers to his feet, then smashes the belt into his face. Brock stands tall with the WWE Title belt.

Cole: "Brock Lesnar has all the momentum entering Judgment Day! He's pinned Kurt Angle and laid out Eddie Guerrero! Is this a sign of what will happen Sunday? Tune in on pay-per-view to see it all play out! For James E. Cornette, this is Michael Cole, saying we'll see you at Judgment Day!"

<<<FIN>>>

[The Third Dukes]

I had Virch all written up when a misplaced backspace ate the post. Dammit. Well, lemme give you his ratings, at least...

Opening six-man: *1/2. Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling.

Kidman/Moore: ***. Nice counter-sequence near the end, and Kidman's improving daily.

Jones/Hennigan. 1/4*. Whatthehellever.

Team Angle/Gettin' Rowdy: **1/4. Perfect example of the tag team formula at work, and it makes me feel optimistic about their six-man provided they keep Konnan at bay.

Ten-man tag: **1/2. Surprisingly good considering it lacked a real story and flow to it, but the unusual pairings drag it down a bit. Eddie's awesomeness carries it back up, though.

Sorry, guys. But I have good news...

JUDGMENT DAY PREDICTION CONTEST~!

I've added jesse_ewiak's match to the PPV proper (why not?), bringing us to nine matches. Here's the list. For this contest, use RoH-style confidence points. Each match is given a number from one to nine based on how certain you are of your prediction. If you're right, you win the number of points equal to the number you gave the match. In addition, there will be five bonus questions, worth one point each, bringing your total to 50 points maximum. First tiebreak is number of matches, then whether you scored your 9-pointer, then your 8-pointer, etc. The matches and questions are below. Winner gets to influence the booking of Badd Blood to a certain degree.

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner?

2. Which match goes on first?

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night?

4. What match will be the shortest?

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who?

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

7. What storyline has been the best written?

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

Thanks!

Dukes

[rockyoursox]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle (8 pts.)

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy (4 pts.)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN (6 pts.)

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle (3 pts.)

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward (7 pts.)

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan (5 pts.)

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers (1 pt.)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn (2 pts.)

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner (9 pts.)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner?

- A re-hired John Cena

2. Which match goes on first?

- RVD vs. Matt Hardy, US Title Match

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night?

- Filthy Animals vs. Team JAPAN, Ladder Match

4. What match will be the shortest?

- Jamie Noble vs. Billy Gunn

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who?

- Billy Kidman

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

- Based on the the triple-threat for the main event, the ladder match, and RVD/Matt Hardy, I think this is definitely worth it. It's better than just about any Smackdown PPV card they've had since the split.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

- The World Title match, no doubt. Guerrero vs. Lesnar vs. Angle is a great-sounding match. And I'm a huge mark for ladder matches AND Rey Mysterio, so that's an extremely close second.

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

- Hurricane vs. Bull Buchanan. Why not just make it an 8-man tag with a mystery partner? This match might make a good Smackdown match, but for a PPV, it just doesn't work for me.

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

- Until a month ago, I would have said Lesnar, but he's making big strides now. I'd like to see Mysterio get a good solo run in, but he's getting a big tag push now, so I have no major complaints there.

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

- Nathan Jones and Kidman are the two I can think of. Jones is junk, and Kidman really isn't all that interesting a character (although his BVS background does make it a lot easier to justify his place)

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

- Besides the ususal suspects (Styles, Daniels, and Raven), I'd like to see you bring in America's Most Wanted to help beef up the RAW tag team division. The Smackdown tag division is incredibly strong, and RAW's could use a small shot in the arm to help bring it up to Smackdown's standards.

7. What storyline has been the best written?

- I've surprisingly liked the build to the RTC 6-man, which is a surprise to me. Also, I've enjoyed the Filthy Animals/Team JAPAN recent build, with Heyman being the brunt of the storyline.

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

- Either drop the women from the Jones/Taker feud, or get rid of Gunn/Noble/Nidia. They already did this stuff on Smackdown, and it wasn't entertaining. I'm sure you'd do a better job of it, but still, I just don't like any of the characters.

[Jam]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle - (1 Point)

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy - (7 Points)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN - (5 Points)

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle - (4 Points)

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward - (2 Points)

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan - (9 Points)

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers - (3 Points)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn - (6 Points)

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner - (8 Points)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? I stumped already. John Cena is my pick, but I think it could be someone like The Idol or Chris Harris

2. Which match goes on first? #1 Contenders Tag Team Match

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Ladder Match for the Tag Belts

4. What match will be the shortest? Hurricane Vs Buchanon

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Misterio

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

Yes, especially when its compared to what the WWE actually did put out for Judgment Day

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

WWE Title Match, because it took me ages to pick a winner, and the RTC/Nova/London match, to see who the partner is

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

Probably the #1 Contenders Match for the Tag Belts, as it has no rivalry behind it

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

Los Maximos, Shannon Moore and Jamie Noble

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

RTC have been over pushed, especially into a big rivalry with Piper

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

CM Punk, AJ Styles or Raven

7. What storyline has been the best written?

I've enjoyed the Taker/Jones one, but I don't agree with Torrie/Shannon involved. Also the tag team title one has been great

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

None really, all have been planned and written well

[Guest Demon2K4]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle (7 Points)

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy (6 Points)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN (5 Points)

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle (2 Points)

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward (4 Points)

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan (8 Points)

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers (4 Points)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn (7 Points)

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner (8 Points)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? Hmm..i'll go out on a limb and say..Raven.

2. Which match goes on first? #1 Contenders Match

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? WWE Tag Titles Ladder Match

4. What match will be the shortest? Hurricane Vs Buchanan

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Kidman.

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

Most definitely. Way better than the WWE's real Judgement Day.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

The tag team ladder match, most likely. I'm a fan of spotfests.

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

Buchanan Vs Hurricane.

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

Hmm..i'll say Matt Hardy. Even though he IS challenging for the US title and stuff, I'd like to see him go farther.

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

Mark Henry as a member of the RTC. He doesn't do much, but still, I hate him.

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

I'd like to see you bring in Raven. An obvious choice, but it would be pretty cool.

7. What storyline has been the best written?

I like all the stuff with the RTC.

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

Billy Gunn/Nidia/Jamie Noble. Unless you do plan to do something really awesome with it, just drop it.

Overall, should be an awesome. I'll check back and R&R.

[Drunken Muppet]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle (Points: 3)

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy (Points: 2)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN (Points: 7)

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle (Points: 5)

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward (Points: 9)

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan (Points: 8)

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers (Points: 1)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn (Points: 4)

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner (Points: 6)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? Spanky..*prays*

2. Which match goes on first? #1 Contenders Match

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? RVD/Matt Hardy

4. What match will be the shortest? Hurricane/Bull

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Somebody from ladder match

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

Minus Undertaker & Torrie Wilson against Nathan Jones & Ward.. than yes.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

Triple Threat Match & Tag Team Ladder Match

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

Hurricane vs. Bull, it really shouldn't been by itself. Maybe Richards or Morley against Hurricane.

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

Los Maximos & Paul London

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

Billy Gunn..die Gunn die!

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

America's Most Wanted or Sonjay Dutt. AMW could work on either show's tag team roster and Sonjay could really do great in the Cruiserweight Division.

7. What storyline has been the best written?

I'd have to go with Kidman & Jones storyline.

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

Nidia/Gunn/Noble.. give Jamie Noble another title run or trade him to Raw to get a fresh start.

[Steve Corino]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle - 8

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy - 4

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN - 7

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle - 5

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward - 9

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan - 3

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers - 9 (it's the ONLY way to get good matches considering the two possible teams who could get the belts)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn - 2

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner - 6

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? No clue

2. Which match goes on first? RVD vs Hardy

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Animals vs JAPAN

4. What match will be the shortest? Hurricane vs Buchanan

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Jamie Noble

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

Yes. The good heavily outweighs the bad.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

Eddy vs Angle vs Brock

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

Noble vs Gunn

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

Stevie Richards

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

Konnan

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

CW Anderson! Yes, I'm a mark for CW.

7. What storyline has been the best written?

The Piper/RTC stuff.

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

Noble/Gunn/Nidia

Edited. Eh, I never understood how it worked back in the original BVS either.

Edited May 29, 2004 by Steve Corino

[GCCWolverine]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © (9)

* US Title: Matt Hardy (3)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © (6)

* Team Angle (1)

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson (7)

* Bull Buchanan (4)

* Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers (5)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble (2)

* Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner (8)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? For lack of a better idea, Lance Storm

2. Which match goes on first? Hurricane/Bull

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Animals/Japan

4. What match will be the shortest? Noble/Gunn

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Jose Maximo (with Bradshaw, Faarooq, and Bossman in the same ring, somebody's gotta lose a leg...)

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

Sort of...the tag match will be a classic, but the other well-thought out matches involve lower-carders.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

Ladder-mania, baby!

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

Noble vs Gunn

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

Rey Mysterio, insomuch as Konnan is getting shots where Mysterio would fit a lot better.

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

Billy Gunn

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

Shark Boy, he would make a perfect partner for London/Nova

7. What storyline has been the best written?

I've really enjoyed the tag team storyline.

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

Noble/Gunn/Nidia, yesterday.

Oh, and to quote Virch re: Heyman knowing Kidman, "I love shoot comments that aren't supposed to be shoot comments..."

[Ace]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle - Eddie

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy - Matt Hardy

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN - Filthy Animals

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle - Team Angle

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward - taker and Torrie

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan - Hurricane

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers - Los Maximos

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn - Gunn

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner - Nova/London/Spanky

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? SPANKY!!!

2. Which match goes on first? 1 contenders

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Filthy Animals s. Team JAPAN

4. What match will be the shortest? Noble vs. Gunn

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Tajiri. It's a ladder match

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it? Yes

2. What match would you most be looking forward to? Guerrero vs. Angle vs. Lesnar

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card? Hurricane vs. Bull Buchanan

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!? KIDMAN Give him the title

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!? Steven Richards

6. What independent signing should I look into making? AJ Styles

7. What storyline has been the best written? Guerrero/Lesnar/Angle

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation? RTC

[The Third Dukes]

I need "Steve Corino" and "TheAce" to rework their ballots. Part of this is my fault, of course, as I wasn't clear when it came to how Confidence Points work. See, each match MUST get a DIFFERENT number from 1 to 9. So SC, you need to use all the numbers (too many 9s and 8s), and Ace, you need to... well, you need to use ANY numbers.

Judgment Day backstage notes...

* Chris Harris is backstage at Judgment Day. He is currently not in negotiations with WWE, preferring to honor his NWATNA contract, although it should be noted that he has broken off contract renewal talks with them, too.

* Triple H and Dallas Page are two of the RAW stars spotted backstage. HHH has been off television since Backlash, while Page, as a TV personality, is not needed on the house show circuit.

* CM Punk and Sonjay Dutt have been spotted backstage as well. It is believed that they will be fodder on the Judgment Day pre-show, as both men are currently working part-time in OVW.

* One person conspicuous by his absence is Jim Cornette, who checked into a hospital over the weekend for an emergency appendectomy. He is said to be doing well and will be back for TV this week. The WWE has not announced who, if anyone, will take his place on the mic. The obvious choice, Tazz, is legitimately re-training for a full-time in-ring career, which was the point of Cornette being on color.

* Roddy Piper appears to be more excited than usual about the first PPV with his face associated with it. One person in the know says that Piper is thrilled to be back in Hollywood and that a lot of his friends, including John Carpenter, are in attendance to watch his show.

* Speaking of Hollywood, both the Rock and Hulk Hogan are in the audience, and they've brought some of their LA friends with them. It appears that wrestling's resurgence, coming off of a well-received WrestleMania, is drawing a crowd.

* Eddie Guerrero has received a three-minute chant from his highlight video.

Credit: WO.com

[tristy]

If we can still vote, here are my predictions. If not, i'll do it anyways.

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle 9

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy 6

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN 2

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle 7

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward 10

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan 4

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers 1

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn 3

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner 0

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? Spanky

2. Which match goes on first? Gunn vs Knoble

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? RVD vs Version One

4. What match will be the shortest? Taker & Wilson vs Jones & Ward

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Hardy

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it? No.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to? Tag Title Match

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card? 6 man tag

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!? Bubba Rogers 

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!? 3 Live Kru

6. What independent signing should I look into making? Tristin Hayze *shifty*

7. What storyline has been the best written? Piper & RTC

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation? Taker & Jones

Edited May 28, 2004 by Tristy

[jesse_ewiak]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © (8) -

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © (3)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © (7)

* Team Angle (4)

* Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward (5)

* Hurricane (6)

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos (1)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble (2)

* . Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner (9)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? Hmm....American Dragon?

2. Which match goes on first? #1 contenders

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Tag Title Match

4. What match will be the shortest? Hurricane v. Bull Buchannan

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Tajiri

[Ron]

Yay! Still Time..

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle (9)

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy(1)

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN(2)

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle (3)

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward(5)

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan(6)

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers(4)

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn(7)

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner (8)

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner? RODDY PIPER

2. Which match goes on first? Hurricane vs. Bull

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Tag Ladder Match

4. What match will be the shortest? The Mixed Tag

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Torrie Wilson after a sick boot by Nathan Jones

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it?

-Yea. That Triple Threat/RVD vs. Hardy/And the ladder match are all good.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to?

-The Triple Threat World Title Match

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card?

-Only one I see any doubt about is Hurricane vs. Bull, but even that match doesn't bother me.

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!?

-Stevie Richards. Sure he is the leader of RTC, but I'd like to see him break away and go on his own to win a title.

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!?

-Any woman. They all seem just "in the way".

6. What independent signing should I look into making?

-As said before, a tag team that could be used for Raw. Which team? That I am not sure of.

7. What storyline has been the best written?

-I have actually liked the Sylvan Grenier stuff over on Raw, the Benoit-Christian-Chynna-Molly stuff. Over on SD! I've like Team Angle vs. 3 Live Kru, the Tag storyline, and the beast that is Nathan Jones

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation?

-Gunn vs. Noble. I've seen it before and its just ok. However, Billy Gunn (and Noble) should be destined for greater things! (Maybe Gunn can help the Raw tag division?)

[Guest peter]

* WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero © v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle 9

* US Title: Rob Van Dam © v. Matt Hardy 6

* WWE Tag Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals © v. Team JAPAN 8

* 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle 4

* Undertaker and Torrie Wilson v. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward 7

* Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan 1

* #1 Contenders Match: Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers 2

* With special referee Nidia: Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn 3

* Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and a mystery partner 5

QUESTIONS:

1. Who's the mystery partner?Spanky

2. Which match goes on first? Hurricane vs. Bull Buchanen

3. What is EWR's Match of the Night? Ladder Match

4. What match will be the shortest? Undertaker and Torrie Wilson vs. Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward

5. Someone gets legitimately hurt on this show. Who? Kidman

SURVEY QUESTIONS (no credit, but please help me out):

1. Is this card worth the $35 WWE would charge for it? Yes it is.

2. What match would you most be looking forward to? The ladder tag match.

3. What match do you wish wasn't on the card? Hurricane vs. Bull Buchanen

4. Who is underpushed on SmackDown!? Los Maximos

5. Who has gotten overpushed on SmackDown!? Nathan Jones

6. What independent signing should I look into making? John Cena, you should've made him into a star.

7. What storyline has been the best written? The Undertaker/Kidman/Nathan Jones storyline

8. What storyline should be dropped without hesitation? RTC

[The Third Dukes]

JUDGMENT DAY 2004

WE'RE IN THE SPECIAL EFFECTS CAPITAL OF THE WORLD SO OF COURSE WE'RE GOING OVERBOARD ON THE PYRO as we join you live from Hooray for Hollywood for this Pay-Per-View extravaganza! Sign in the crowd: "He Lives!" Hey, is that sign held by John Carpenter?

Cole: "Three men have a chance to rise to the top of their industry, while four men have a chance to etch their names in immortality! Welcome to Judgment Day! I'm Michael Cole, your host for this evening, as James E. Cornette is unavailable for tonight's broadcast, and for the next three hours, we will provide you with the best wrestling SmackDown! has to offer!"

"Ashes to Ashes" hits over the PA system as we get ready for our first contest tonight. 3 Live Kru emerges from the back, each person doing what he does best.

Chimel: "The following 6-man tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, making their way to the ring, at a total combined weight of 716 pounds, Road Dogg, Konnan, and the WWE Cruiserweight champion Ron Killings, 3 Live Kru!"

All three men enter the ring and play to the crowd. Konnan takes the mic from Chimel.

Konnan: "Yo yo yo let me speak on dis. ODELAY! ARRIBA LA RAZA! You know dose wack'd-out Angle tossers dink dey the Next Big Ting, but right here in da ring, we got da 3 big kings, but even more dan dat, Los Angeles, California, Da Kru -- los gringos Mexamericanos -- we BOWDY BOWDY and..."

Before the crowd can reply, the championship-style music that WGTT had before their return to Kurt's fold plays. All three men walk to the ring, wearing matching tracksuits and looks of determination.

Chimel: "And their opponents, at a total combined weight of 755 pounds, Eric Angle, Charlie Haas, and Shelton Benjamin, Team Angle!"

3 Live Kru vs. Team Angle

Everyone brawls to start, Konnan pairing off with Eric while Dogg gets Haas and Killings gets Shelton. Konnan sends Eric into the ropes and hits a rolling lariat to knock him from the ring. Konnan follows to the outside as Haas and Shelton have the advantage. After a series of whip reversals, Dogg and Shelton are sent into each other, with Dogg clotheslining Shelton down. Dogg bends over, allowing Killings to leap off of Dogg's back and get a body attack on Haas, who simply catches him and tosses him over the top.

Dogg picks Shelton up for the Dogg Pound, but Haas shoves him over and Shleton falls on top for two. Shelton sends Dogg into the ropes and hits a T-Bone suplex on him on the way out, covering for two. Eric tags in and stomps away on Dogg as the crowd chants for Konnan to come in. Eric grabs Dogg from behind and hits a German suplex, bridging and getting two. Eric tags in Haas, who enters with a missile dropkick.

He sneaks up behind Dogg and tries for an Angle Slam, but Dogg slips out, so Haas hits a discus lariat while spinning around. Shelton is tagged in, and Haas holds Dogg on the ropes while Shelton dives over the top with the leapfrog choke. Dogg staggers back into an overhead suplex by Shelton, who covers for two. Shelton brings Eric in while placing Dogg on his own shoulders.

Eric climbs to the top rope and clotheslines Dogg off in the Doomsday Device. Eric twirls for the crowd, then pulls his straps down, imitating his brother. He grabs Dogg's ankle, but Dogg quickly squirms out of it. Eric waits for Dogg to charge, then drops his throat-first on the top rope. Dogg falls to the mat, so Eric goes to the top rope and acts like he's going to try a moonsault. However, Killings runs over and shoves Eric off the top rope, as he lands on his back.

Dogg rolls over for two. Both men are up, and Dogg charges into an Eric belly-to-belly. Shelton tags in and tries to kick Dogg in the gut, but Dogg catches it. Dogg spins Shelton around, only to get hit with the Dragon Whip. Shelton covers for two. Shelton tosses Dogg into the corner and charges in for a Stinger Splash, but Konnan pulls Dogg out of the way.

Dogg tags in Killings, who opens up with punches on Shelton before backing him into the corner. He mounts Shelton and delivers 10 punches in a row. He sends Shelton into the opposite corner and connects with a clothesline on the way in. Killings climbs the same top rope and ranas Shelton on the way down for two. Killings runs off the ropes and goes for a sunset flip, but Eric trips him up. Killings stops to yell at Eric, only to have Shelton roll him up (with feet on the ropes) for two.

Shelton tags in Haas, and the duo hit the Star Spangled Blaster on Killings for two. Haas hooks Killings' legs and tries for a figure-four, but Killings rolls him up for two. Haas grabs Killings from behind with a release German suplex and yells at him to stay down. Haas drops a knee and grabs a front chancery, adding knee strikes as he does. Killings slowly gets to his feet, so Haas suplexes him and covers for two. Eric tags in, and he waits for Killings to get to his feet.

Eric tries for an Angle Slam, but Killings lands on his feet and delivers a jumping calf kick to Eric. Both men slowly get up, and Killings tries for a Truth or Consequences on Eric, who shoves him into the ropes. No matter, as Killings catches Eric with a kneelift on the way back. Konnan is finally tagged in, and all three members of Team Angle get smacked around in turn. Konnan rams Eric's head into the turnbuckle ten times, then slips aside as Shelton Stinger Splashes Eric by mistake. Killings returns and monkey flips Shelton, who bails to the outside, where Dogg and Haas are fighting.

Killings runs the ropes and attakcs with a plancha onto all three men. Back in the ring, Konnan gets a powerslam on Eric for two. He grabs Eric's arm and struts around to go for the Tequila Sunrise, but Haas returns and bulldogs Konnan down. Eric gets up, but backs into Dogg, who tries for the Dogg Pound. However, Haas dropkicks Dogg, and on the rebound off the ropes, Eric hits the Angle Slam on Dogg. He covers, everyone else is held at bay, and the ref signals the three.

WINNERS: Team Angle (17:28)

Cole: "And Team Angle gets the duke here tonight! It was Charlie Haas pinning Konnan and Shelton Benjamin pinning Ron Killings on SmackDown!, and now Eric Angle completes the trifecta over the Road Dogg! We're just getting started here, folks!"

Let's go backstage, where we see Torrie Wilson talking to the sound manager.

Torrie: "Now remember, when it's our turn, play THIS track here. It's very important."

Techie: "Yes, ma'am... but... but this is..."

Torrie: "I know what it is. That's why I want it played! Look, Undertaker and I have talked this through, and it's what we want. Okay?"

Techie: "All right, ma'am. You're the boss."

Torrie: "Great. Now, I just gotta get to wardrobe..."

And now we head back to ringside.

Cole: "Well, whatever Torrie's plans are, we're going to find later on tonight, when she and the Undertaker take part in a mixed tag match against a pair of very unstable forces in Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward. Folks, our next match has been building since WrestleMania, as we have a bunch of people who don't seem to trust each other."

We get a video look back at the Noble/Gunn/Nidia storyline, starting right after WrestleMania when Nidia may or may not have cost Noble the Cruiserweight title; advancing through the weeks, as the trio constantly have miscommunication that is detrimental to Noble; and finally finishing with Noble claiming there's a conspiracy and demanding a match with Gunn. When Nidia protests, Noble names her the referee.

The rockabilly strains that are Jamie Noble's (and, by proxy, Billy Gunn's) music play constantly as each person enters the ring separately, in the order that we hear Tony Chimel introduce them.

Chimel: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, the special guest referee for today's match: Nidia! And now the participants... first, from Hanover, WV, weighing in at an even 200 pounds, Jamie Noble! And his opponent, from the Great State of Texas, weighing 269 pounds, Billy Gunn!"

As all three are in the ring, Noble and Gunn have a face-off. Noble is clearly heard yelling to Nidia about being treated fairly. Gunn seems nonplussed, backing off and shooting Noble a funny look. Nidia pleads with both men for a clean fight before reluctantly calling for the bell.

With Special Referee Nidia: Jamie Noble vs. Billy Gunn

They lock up, and Gunn drives his knee into Noble's gut. Gunn backs Noble into the corner and punches away at him. Nidia tries to break them up, so Noble goes over her and slaps Gunn. The two lock up again, and this time Noble gets a wristlock. Gunn reaches behind him, but can't find Noble, who rides him to the ground and slaps his head around. Nidia pulls Noble off of Gunn, but that causes Noble to protest to Nidia. Gunn grabs Noble as Nidia warns about a hair pull, picking Noble up in the Jackhammer. He covers for a hesitant two.

Gunn questions the count, which allows Noble to roll Gunn up for an equally slow two. Now Noble complains, but Nidia stands firm as Gunn slugs Noble in the back. Gunn tries for a military press, but Noble slides down Gunn's back and hits a back suplex. He covers for a slow two. Noble picks Gunn up and sends him into the turnbuckle, following him in with a clothesline.

As Gunn staggers out, Noble hits a bulldog that sends Gunn crashing into Nidia. A distressed Noble goes over to Nidia and tries to help her out, but as Nidia gets up, she shoves Noble. The two get into an argument, with Nidia clearly heard saying "you did that on purpose" as Gunn gets up and rolls Noble up from behind. Nidia counts a fast three out of spite.

WINNER: Billy Gunn (5:04)

Noble gets up and gets in Gunn's face, but Gunn simply points out he was doing what anyone would do. Nidia separates the two, so Noble turns to her and the two of them have a huge argument over the end of the match and the last two months in general. Both are yelling at each other as Gunn tries to play peacemaker. Nidia has enough and slaps Noble hard across the face as Gunn takes the hint and walks off. Nidia storms off as well, and Noble remains in the ring, stunned, with what appears to be a tear rolling down his cheek.

Cole: "What a bizarre turn of events that is, folks. I don't like seeing people go through tough times like that, and... I don't wanna say Jamie Noble had it coming, but this is hardly a surprise."

Hey folks, the No Way Out DVD drops Tuesday! Angle vs. Tazz! Eddie, RVD, Nathan, and Noble in the King of the Ring! A huge Scramble Match! Cena vs. Rhyno, with two young careers on the line! You know you want all this!

Kevin Kelly is backstage with the Right to Censor.

Kelly: "Guys, it's become clear over the past few weeks that you feel you've been overlooked here in the WWE, and tonight, you have not one, but two matches with which to prove that you belong among the best groups of our time."

Richards: "Mr. Kelly, I'm impressed with the lucidity of your mind. You clearly see that not only are we a strong and powerful group, but righteousness is on our side. Hurricane, what's about to happen to you at the hands of the mighty Buchanan should not be construed as personal. You will be just another bump in the road to our rise to glory. And Nova, how you can stand to pal around with that cheater Paul London is beyond me. But tonight, we will stand together in the ring, and show him and you both a lesson for your own good."

Kelly: "That's all well and good, but are you worried about who it is that General Manager Roddy Piper will name as their partner in tonight's six-man challenge?"

Morley: "Does it look like we care? It can be anyone that old fossil tries to dig up. We've seen Hulk Hogan in the audience here, so that's one old man he can't contact. No matter who it is, though, Mr. Kelly, we will show him that this should not be his fight -- because it is our fight. We're done here. Make sure to walk the straight and narrow, Mr. Kelly."

They all proceed to head off.

Kelly: "Michael, back to you."

Cole: "All right, Kevin, and that big six-man is coming up soon, but right now we have this man, who has volunteered to step into the shoes of an injured Edge and avenge a wrong from weeks ago."

Chimel: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Parts Unknown, weighing 191 pounds, the Hurricane!"

As Hurricane's music plays, he struts down to the ring. Hurricane rolls in and shakes hands with the referee and with Chimel before posing on the second rope. Just then, sirens wail and buzzers buzz as Bull Buchanan walks out -- alone, surprisingly enough.

Chimel: "And his opponent, coming to the ring, from Eddyville, KY, weighing in at 275 pounds, Right to Censor member Bull Buchanan!"

Bull steps into the ring and holds his hand up high in the RTC pose as the crowd boos. He turns and faces Hurricane, who offers his hand for a handshake. Surprisingly, Bull takes it, but not surprisingly, he pulls Hurricane in and mutters something to him menacingly. Hurricane shrugs it off and prepares for battle.

The Hurricane vs. Bull Buchanan

Bull tosses Hurricane into the corner off of a lockup, pausing to hold his hand up high. Hurricane fakes a lockup, ducks underneath Bull, and dropkicks him to send him down. A second dropkick follows, then a third, after which Bull heads to the outside. Hurricane goes to the top turnbuckle and flies onto Bull on the outside. Hurricane returns to the ring as Bull pulls himself in, and Hurricane tries to suplex Bull over the ropes.

Bull blocks it and shoulderblocks Hurricane, then steps in and grabs Hurricane for a powerslam. Bull covers for two. Bull sends Hurricane into the corner and charges in with a big boot. As Hurricane staggers out, Bull tries Snake Eyes, but Hurricane blocks by landing on his feet. Bull runs into a Hurricane superkick, then, as Bull slowly gets up, Hurricane runs at him and connects with the Shining Wizard. Hurricane covers for two, after which Bull emphatically kicks out. Hurricane charges, but Bull catches him in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.

Bull stomps away at Hurricane, then holds his hand up for the crowd. Bull tries to whip Hurricane into the corner, but Hurricane reverses, so Bull jumps to the top rope and gets his springboard lariat. He covers for two. Bull picks Hurricane up and tosses him over the top rope to the outside, where he pulls away the mats. Bull sets Hurricane up for a powerbomb on the concrete floor (the move that hurt Edge), but Hurricane backdrops out of it.

Hurricane waits until Bull is to one knee, then nails a swinging neckbreaker. Hurricane rolls in to stop the count, then returns to the outside, where he dives off the apron onto Bull. Hurricane poses for the crowd, then rolls Bull back in and heads to the top rope. Hurricane dives off the top rope in a crossbody. The cover gets two. Bull reverses a Hurricane whip into the ropes, but puts his head down. Hurricane sunset flips Bull for two.

Hurricane sends Bull into the corner, but Bull ducks the charge and Hurricane slams his own head into the turnbuckle. Bull lariats Hurricane down. He covers for two. Bull argues the count, then sends Hurricane into the ropes. Bull tries another tilt-a-whirl, but Hurricane reverses this one to a rana. Bull staggers to his feet by the ropes, so Hurricane comes up from behind and grabs Bull into the Eye of the Hurricane. The cover gets two before Bull's foot is on the ropes. Hurricane pulls Bull to his feet, but gets shoved into the referee for his troubles, and both go down.

Bull takes the time to remove a turnbuckle pad, then grabs Hurricane. Bull tries a slam, but Hurricane rolls through for nothing because the ref is out. Hurricane looks around, then wakes the referee up. As he does, Bull clubs Hurricane in the back, then floors Hurricane with a right cross. Bull covers for two. Bull sends Hurricane into the ropes, but Hurricane tries a crossbody on the way out. Bull catches Hurricane and drops him with Snake Eyes into the exposed turnbuckle. As Hurricane is doubled over in pain, Bull nails him with a scissors kick. Bull goes to the top and connects with a flying legdrop. The cover gets the three.

WINNER: Bull Buchanan (12:58)

Cole: "What a cheap victory for Bull Buchanan! I guess it doesn't matter to the Right to Censor how they win, as long their hand is raised in victory!"

We return to backstage, where Torrie Wilson is emerging from the wardrobe room and headed to a dressing room marked "private". She runs into Billy Kidman. They hug and kiss.

Kidman: "What's in the bag? Is that for us later?"

Torrie: "Oh, no, no -- this is for tonight! It's my costume!"

Kidman: "Costume? But... I thought you were wrestling in that."

Torrie: "Not anymore. We have a plan."

Kidman: "What is it?"

Torrie: "I can't say. It's better you don't know. Don't worry, though -- everything will be fine! You just get ready for your ladder match... you know I want you to come back in one piece."

Kidman: "Okay, honey. See you after the show!"

Torrie walks off. Kidman stares in her direction, confused. We return to ringside.

Cole: "What DOES Torrie have in mind, anyway? First new music, then a new outfit... I don't blame Kidman for being confused."

Mexican music plays as Jose and Joel Maximo emerge from the back, yelling at the fans.

Chimel: "The following is a triple threat tag team match scheduled for one fall, with the winner being declared the #1 Contender for the WWE Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, Team #1, from Guadalajara, Jalisco, Mexico, at a total combined weight of 370 pounds, Jose and Joel, Los Maximos!"

The duo enter the ring and play to the crowd some more. The heavily Hispanic crowd actually cheers them a little. The APA's rock guitar chords play as they emerge on the ramp, playing to the crowd.

Chimel: "Team #2, at a total combined of 560 pounds, Faarooq and Bradshaw, the APA!"

Both men get into the ring and pose for the crowd, then turn around and point and laugh at the Maximos, who don't seem too amused. The web browser loads 10, 30, and 70 before running into a system error and beginning the MFers music.

Chimel: "And their opponents, at a total combined weight of 490 pounds, the team of Shannon Moore and Big Bubba Rogers!"

Rogers taps his nightstick on the steps as he enters the ring. Everyone stares at each other and awaits the bell.

#1 Contenders' Match for the WWE Tag Team Titles: Los Maximos vs. APA vs. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers

Everyone starts off in the ring beating on anyone that moves. Faarooq and Rogers hit the floor, while the Maximos get a double dropkick on Bradshaw to send him out as well. On the outside, the APA sends Rogers into the steps, while in the ring, Moore scores a double clothesline on the Maximos. Shannon runs the ropes and dives over the top onto the APA and Rogers to send all of them down, and those two teams start a melee.

Bradshaw and Rogers wander off to another side of the ring, which allows the Maximos to hit stereo dives onto the pairs of opponents. Jose, Joel, and Rogers return to the ring, and Rogers pounds on Jose's back. However, Joel springs off of Jose's back and catches Rogers with a calf kick to knock him into the ropes. Joel charges, looking for a flying tackle, but Moore trips his partner and Joel flies over him through the ropes to the outside.

Bradshaw returns and gets a back suplex on Rogers as Jose climbs to the top rope. Jose dives, but Bradshaw catches him and hits a fallaway slam for two. Moore bounces off the top rope and gets Bradshaw with a springboard dropkick, then scores a rana on Bradshaw and a swinging DDT on a returning Faarooq. Joel pulls himself back up to the apron, so Moore tries to suplex him in, but Jose trips Moore and Joel falls on top for two.

The Maximos get a double clothesline on Rogers to knock him down by the turnbuckle. Jose hits a moonsault off the first buckle onto Rogers, Joel hits one off the second buckle, and Jose hits one off the top and covers for two before Bradshaw saves. Bradshaw whips Jose into a spinebuster by Faarooq. Faarooq walks into a Bossman slam from Rogers while the Maximos score the Spanish Fly on Moore. Jose covers Moore as Rogers covers Faarooq, but Joel and Bradshaw make the saves.

Rogers and Bradshaw tumble to the outside as Jose gets a rana on Faarooq. Bradshaw returns and tosses Jose into the corner, hitting the Clothesline from Hell on the way out. Rogers returns and delivers the Bossman Slam to Bradshaw, but Jose dropkicks Rogers as he stands up, tangling him in the ropes. Both Maximos get up and floor Faarooq with a double hiptoss and double elbowdrop before Jose goes up and nails a 450 on Faarooq. This finally gets the three-count.

WINNERS: Los Maximos (9:22)

Cole: "And the appreciative crowd here -- a lot of Hispanics in attendance who follow the lucha libre style and enjoy seeing the Maximos -- they're giving it up for their team, as Jose and Joel will challenge this Thursday for the WWE Tag Team Titles! Folks, our next match started with what seemed like a simple request, and it all built up from there."

We get a video package of the RVD/Hardy feud, which started when RVD said, "I'd have given him a chance, but he didn't say please." This led to Matt and Shannon attacking RVD at every possible opportunity. Matt Hardy makes it perfectly clear he deserves gold as the sensei of Mattitude, while RVD questions his philosophy and how much it matters. The video ends with a shot of the US title between RVD and Matt.

The web browser loads up again, this time making it from 10 to 30 to 70 to 100% without any glitches. Our Matt Facts for the day are that Matt practices yoga and that Matt has been a US citizen since birth. Matt Hardy heads to the ring, making the V-1 sign as he does.

Chimel: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the WWE United States Championship! Introducing first, the challenger, from Cameron, NC, weighing in at 225 pounds, Matt Hardy Version 1!"

Matt gets into the ring and holds the V-1 signal high before making the title motion near his waist. "One of a Kind" plays as the pyro goes off near the stage and the US champ emerges.

Chimel: "And his opponent, from Battle Creek, MI, weighing in at 237 pounds, he is the WWE United States Champion, Rob - Van - Dam!"

RVD climbs into the ring and spin-jumps around to see the whole crowd. He pauses and hits the thumb pose as the crowd chants along. RVD surrenders his title to the referee, who holds it high. The two men face off.

WWE United States Title: Rob Van Dam (champion) vs. Matt Hardy (challenger)

They lock up, and Matt shoves RVD into the corner, following in with punches to the head. Matt clasps on a headlock, and when RVD tries to shove him off, Matt hangs on. RVD picks Matt up for a backdrop, but Matt lands on his feet behind RVD and grabs him for a German suplex, bridging for two. Matt stays on RVD, applying an armbar, as RVD get to his feet. RVD swings at Matt, who ducks and quickly switches to a legtrip and leglock. RVD makes the ropes, and the ref calls for a break.

Matt gives RVD distance, allowing RVD to kip up and nail Matt with a roundhouse. Matt gets up, only to be given another kick to the head, one to the gut, and a throat thrust as RVD does the splits. RVD moves in for a spinkick, but Matt quickly bails to the outside, checking his jaw. RVD rushes at Matt with a baseball slide, sending Matt into the guardrail. RVD lands a series of forearms to Matt before throwing him back in. RVD runs the ropes and connects with Rolling Thunder on Matt. He covers for two.

RVD picks Matt up and sends him into the turnbuckle. He charges and hits a pair of shoulder thrusts, but as he charges off the handspring for the third, Matt grabs his neck and hits a DDT. He covers for two. Matt slams RVD down and goes to the top rope. He yells and drops the leg, covering for two. Matt pounds on RVD in the mounted position, then picks him up and grabs another headlock. RVD shoves him off into the ropes, ducks down on the first pass, then monkey flips Matt over his head.

RVD stomps away at Matt, who quickly bails to the outside again. RVD runs the ropes and dives at Matt with a somersault plancha, but Matt gets out of the way and RVD slams onto the mats outside. Matt bulldogs RVD onto the rampway. Matt picks RVD up and punches him into a dazed state, then hops onto the rail and clotheslines RVD down on the rampway. Back in the ring, Matt tosses RVD into the ropes and hits him with a gutwrench suplex on the way out. Matt picks RVD's legs up and drops a leg between them.

Matt covers, but only gets two. Matt argues with the referee, then picks RVD up and tries to kick him in the stomach. RVD catches the kick and delivers the stepover enzuigiri. RVD heads to the top rope and delivers the split-legged moonsault on Matt. It gets two. RVD sends Matt into the turnbuckle and tries coming in with a monkey flip, but Matt dodges it and RVD goes groinfirst onto the middle turnbuckle. Matt pulls RVD out and kicks him in the stomach for real. He hollers, then lands the Twist of Fate. Matt covers, and it gets the three-count and the title.

WINNER and NEW United States Champion: Matt Hardy (10:46)

Cole: "And just like that, Matt Hardy wins the United States title! Matt Hardy manages to defeat Rob Van Dam, and it may be time for Version 1 to be acknowledged for the upgrade in talent he's shown! We have a new United States champion here in the WWE, and it's Matt Hardy!"

We return to backstage, where Nidia is knocking on the door to the makeup room.

Nidia: "Torrie? Torrie, you in there?"

Torrie (from behind the door): "Yeah."

Nidia: "Torrie, can I come in?"

Torrie: "No! Don't!"

Nidia: "Why not, girl? Not like everyone in America hasn't seen you nekkid."

Nidia opens the door, then freaks out. She stops to catch her breath as the door closes, not allowing the viewer to see what it is.

Torrie: "Don't tell anyone, okay?"

Nidia: "Y-y-y-yeah."

We go back to ringside.

Cole: "Well, I have no idea what's going on there, but..."

Cole is interrupted by the sirens, buzzers, etc.

Chimel: "The following six-man contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a total combined weight of 878 pounds, the team of Steven Richards, Sean Morley, and Mark Henry, the Right to Censor!"

The RTC enters the ring and holds their hands up to a chorus of boos. Steven begins barking orders to his charges as "Not Quite Intergalactic" plays over the PA.

Chimel: "And their opponents, first, on their way to the ring, at a total combined weight of 419 pounds, the team of Paul London and Nova!"

Both men get into the ring and play to the crowd. Steven begins to yell at the referee to make London remove his facemask, but London produces a note for the referee. The ref shows it to Steven, who scowls. Apparently, it was a medical release. But that's not important, because the bagpipers are playing.

Chimel: "And now, to announce the mystery partner, here is the General Manager of SmackDown!, Rowdy Roddy Piper!"

Piper strolls to the ring, wearing a Hot Rod T-shirt and the kilt. Interestingly, he appears to have wrestling boots on. He enters the ring and takes the microphone.

Piper: "All right, Steven, it's the moment you've been dreading. Now, I won't lie to ya, I gave a lotta thought to who this guy was gonna be. And then I remembered something a wise man once said. Roll the footage."

Piper: "...I see that you thought you could get away with brutalizing Nova 4-on-1. Well, in my book, we don't do things that way. If you ain't good enough to be a man and back your words up, I don't want you in my company!"

Piper: "So with that in mind, and since I am a man I want in my company, I'm gonna follow that sage advice, Steve-o. Which for you means that..."

Piper clocks Steven with the microphone before tossing it aside and punching away. Morley and Henry charge Nova and London, and it's on.

Right to Censor vs. Nova, Paul London, and Roddy Piper

The war continues all over the place as the referee tries to restore order. Eventually, it's Morley working on Nova as the crowd chants for Piper. Morley executes his running knee smashes and Russian legsweep on Nova, covering for two. Henry tags in, and Morley and Henry get a double bodyslam. Henry drops an elbow and covers for two. Henry picks Nova up in the bearhug.

Nova fades as Henry squeezes him, and the referee checks his arm. It falls once. It falls twice. As the ref prepares to check the third time, Piper runs in and pokes Henry in the eyes, breaking the hold. Piper is sent back to the outside, so Morley climbs to the top. Henry slams Nova and makes the tag sound for the ref. Morley dives off, but the Moral High Ground misses. Steven is tagged in, but so is Piper.

Piper punches away on Steven in the corner, blasting him with lefts and rights as the crowd cheers him on. Piper grabs Steven and picks him up in an airplane spin, whirling him around before setting him, dizzy, on his feet. Piper then grabs Steven in the Testicular Claw, thrilling the crowd before Henry breaks. Henry pounds Piper to the mat, then bounces off the ropes for the splash. London, however, cuts Henry off mid-"run" and clotheslines him down.

Everyone enters the ring, and a brawl erupts. Steven pounds on Piper in the corner, mounting him in and punching away, but Piper carries him out of the corner and atomic drops him, which Steven oversells. London grabs Steven's head and climbs the turnbuckle, executing the Contra Code. Henry has Nova in the torture rack, but Piper low blows Henry from behind, causing him to drop Nova. Piper puts the sleeper on Henry as Nova and London both boot Morley in the gut. Nova delivers the Kryptonite Krunch to Morley, and the ref, oblivious of who's legal, counts the three.

WINNERS: Roddy Piper, Paul London, and Nova (7:26)

Cole: "What a win for Nova! After two months of being harassed and tortured by the Right to Censor, Nova finally gets his revenge, thanks to the General Manager of SmackDown!"

A replay of the Ron Simmons "Tell me I'm fake" PSA airs.

Cole: "Well, folks, our next match is not for the weak at heart. As you can see, hanging above the ring are the WWE Tag Team Titles. Two teams who have proven to be the best will square off here and now in a ladder match. Only one can win."

The silhouette of the mask appears on the TitanTron. Rey Misterio launches himself up from under the ramp and heads to the ring, with Billy Kidman not too far behind.

Chimel: "The following contest is a ladder match to determine the WWE Tag Team Champions! Entering the ring, at a total combined weight of 360 pounds, the current WWE Tag Team champions, Billy Kidman and Rey Misterio!"

Kidman and Rey enter the ring, looking upward at the titles. They wait as Oriental music plays over the PA system. Ultimo Dragon and Tajiri emerge with Paul Heyman. Tajiri and Heyman walk forward as Ultimo waits to hit his pose and set off spurts of flame.

Chimel: "And the challengers, being accompanied by Paul Heyman, and a total combined weight of an even 400 pounds, Tajiri and Ultimo Dragon, Team JAPAN!"

The challengers enter the ring. Everyone shakes hands and catches their breath.

WWE Tag Team Titles, ladder match: Filthy Animals (champions) vs. Team JAPAN (challengers)

Ultimo and Kidman pair off, as do Rey and Tajiri. Ultimo gets a quick suplex on Kidman, while Rey runs the ropes and ranas Tajiri. Tajiri bails to the outside, allowing the champs to toss Ultimo into the ropes. Ultimo comes out with a handspring, kicking both men in the face. Ultimo grabs Kidman and gives him a DDT as Rey dives over the top onto Tajiri.

Ultimo works over Kidman against the ropes and whips him, but Kidman uses the momentum to dive through the ropes onto both Rey and Ultimo. As everyone gets up, Ultimo climbs to the outside and Asais onto all three. Meanwhile, Heyman tosses the ladder into the ring. Ultimo enters first, taking the ladder and setting it up in the center of the ring. Kidman follows and rams Ultimo into the ladder. Kidman tries for the Kid Krusher, but Ultimo shoves him off into a Tajiri superkick.

Tajiri turns around and is met by a West Coast Hop from Rey. Ultimo is halfway up the ladder, but Rey slides underneath and powerbombs Ultimo off. Rey starts to climb the ladder, but a dazed Kidman stumbles into it, and Rey and ladder both tumble to the mat. Ultimo is up, and he hiptosses Kidman onto the ladder. Kidman is on his knees in pain, so Ultimo dropkicks Kidman in the back. Rey grabs Ultimo from behind and sends him into the corner. Rey gets a monkey flip on the way out.

Tajiri picks up the ladder and sets it up, but Rey gets a neckbreaker on Tajiri to stop him. Rey now tries to climb the ladder, but Ultimo recovers enough to yank him off the ladder. Ultimo kicks Rey in the face, turns around, and vaults for the Asai DDT, only to have Rey get out of the way. Ultimo lands on his feet, but Kidman is right behind him and connects with the Kid Krusher. Tajiri charges Rey, but Rey sidesteps, so Tajiri rebounds with the handspring elbow. Kidman is resting in the corner, so Tajiri runs over and hooks the Tarantula on him.

Rey uses the hold as an opportunity to get the belts, so Tajiri has to break and climb after Rey. Tajiri manages to climb up behind Rey and pull him from the ladder with an electric chair drop. Ultimo slowly gets to his feet as Tajiri begins to climb the ladder. Kidman is also up, and he dropkicks Ultimo into the ladder, knocking it over and sending Tajiri to the mat. Kidman and Ultimo unleash chops on each other near the ropes, but it's broken up when Rey hits the 6-1-9 on an unsuspecting Ultimo.

Kidman tries to climb the ladder, but Tajiri cuts him off and tries to powerbomb Kidman. Kidman easily reverses off the ladder to a facebuster. Kidman resets the ladder. He climbs again, but this time Ultimo is ready and grabs Kidman from behind in a Dragon sleeper. Kidman flails around, tapping Ultimo's shoulder (which doesn't count), but Rey heads to the top and missile dropkicks Ultimo to break. He falls on Kidman, though, so Ultimo is able to climb the ladder again. Rey follows him up, and both men grab one belt each.

They simultaneously try to pry theirs off and knock down their opponent when Kidman removes the ladder. Rey loses the chicken-fight, but Ultimo loses his grip as well. Kidman charges Ultimo with the ladder, but gets drop toe holded into the ladder. Tajiri, meanwhile, charges Rey, only to get caught with a series of armdrags.

Ultimo sets the ladder up again and climbs, but Rey's final hiptoss sends Tajiri into the ladder, knocking Ultimo off. Ultimo lands on his feet and steadies the ladder, but Kidman arrives this time and slams Ultimo into the ladder headfirst. Kidman and Tajiri try to climb the ladder at the same time, and they meet at the top in a chopfest. Rey tries to pull Tajiri down, but Heyman enters the ring and trips him. Rey dropkicks Heyman into the ropes, then bounces off and gives him the 6-1-9. Heyman flies backwards into the ladder as both Kidman and Tajiri fall. Kidman lands on the ropes groin-first, while Tajiri gets his foot caught in the ropes as he flies over.

Back in the ring, Ultimo pounds on Rey and sends him into the turnbuckle. Rey slumps in the corner, so Ultimo sets the ladder up and climbs again. Outside the ring, Kidman traps Tajiri's foot beneath the steps, then returns to the ring. Ultimo is nearly at the top when Kidman alleyoops a charging Rey, who ranas Ultimo off the ladder. Ultimo rolls to the outside near Tajiri as Kidman climbs to the top rope and Rey resets the ladder. Ultimo helps Tajiri up as Kidman flies off, doing a full backflip and DDTing both Team JAPAN members on the floor outside.

Back in the ring, Rey is halfway up the ladder when Heyman sprays mist into his eyes, blinding him and knocking him off the ladder. Kidman returns, throwing Ultimo in with him, and pounds on Heyman repeatedly until Heyman rolls back out of the ring. Kidman turns around as Ultimo is on the top rope, and Ultimo connects with the Asai DDT. Tajiri returns to the ring as Rey gets a bizarre submission hold (Deja Vu in the video games) on Ultimo.

Tajiri hobbles up the ladder, unable to put weight on the foot caught in the ropes. Rey releases the hold and grabs Tajiri's bad foot, causing him to howl in pain, lose his balance, and fall to the mat. Tajiri rolls outside, unable to stand. Kidman rolls out to keep him busy as Rey and Ultimo climb the ladder together. They reach the top at the same time. The two men slug it out, slowly, before Kidman returns to the ring. He grabs Ultimo and holds his arms down as Rey reaches up and finally pulls the titles down for the victory.

WINNERS and STILL WWE Tag Team Champions: Filthy Animals (22:58)

Kidman and Rey slowly walk back to the dressing room, but see Tajiri on the outside, clutching his ankle. They offer him their hands and pull him up, then walk him to the back as the crowd applauds. If you look closely, you can see Heyman holding up the "X" in the background.

Cole: "Perhaps one of the best tag ladder matches there has ever been has ended with a show of class and respect by all four men involved. These guys gave you all they had once again, and anyone else who claims to be a tag team champion ought to be ashamed after seeing this performance. We'll be right back."

The WWE show calendar plays. Hey, did you know RAW is headed on a tour of Ireland in 10 days? Well, you do now. Also, SmackDown! will be in Las Vegas to tape the TV show next. Hopefully, by then, we'll have an update on Tajiri's condition.

Didgeridoo music plays as we return to the ring. Michael Cole isn't on commentary, as he has drawn refereeing duty for this match. Nathan Jones emerges, with Shannon Ward leading the way, smiling wildly to the camera as she always does.

Chimel: "The following mixed tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Making their way to the ring, at a total combined weight of 465 pounds, the team of Shannon 'Psycho' Ward and Nathan Jones!"

Ward and Jones enter the ring, Ward over the bottom rope, Jones over the top. Jones gets in Cole's face about being a fair official as Ward laughs in delight. The two look to the entranceway, awaiting their opponents.

The lights go out. A single gong is heard. But this time, there's no revving of the engine. The gong repeats. Soon, eerie organ music can be heard floating in. A lightning bolt appears to hit the stage, causing a wall of fire to form. As it dies down, two figures appear on the other side. A spotlight shines on them.

Torrie Wilson is dressed in a long black dress, hiding virtually all of her features. She wears a black veil and has her nails painted black. In her hands is a familiar sight -- the urn. Behind her is the Undertaker -- not the bike rider, but the original Deadman himself, in full regalia. He has black gloves, a full-length trench coat, black boots, a wide-brimmed black hat with a gray band encircling it, and a black and gray striped tie. Both walk slowly, as if in a trance, to the ring. Torrie never shifts her glance from the urn, and the Undertaker never looks up.

As they enter the ring, Torrie lifts her veil to show an ashen face, with dark rings around her eyes. Her lips are black -- she looks like she's trying to look like Ward -- and she sends a thousand-yard stare to Ward. Taker stands on the steps and raises his hands as the lights return to the arena. He enters the ring and slowly removes his hat. He takes off his trenchcoat, which Torrie takes and emotionlessly places on the corner. The camera shows Nathan, bewildered yet seemingly nervous.

Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward vs. Torrie Wilson and THE Undertaker

Jones charges and slugs Taker, who simply stares at him. He tries again, but again nothing. Jones looks at his hands, uncertain what to make of it, then gets a running start and boots Taker over the top rope, but Taker lands on his feet and stares at Jones. Jones follows him to the outside as Ward enters the ring and looks at Torrie. Torrie slowly enters, and Ward slaps her. Torrie doesn't flinch. The men return to the ring. Jones tries to grab Torrie, but a gloved hand cuts him off. Taker pulls Jones back and chokeslams him. Ward looks at Taker and screams -- in legitimate fright. Torrie picks her up, throws her over her shoulder, and Tombstones her. She crosses Ward's arms, covers, and three-count follows.

WINNERS: THE Undertaker and Torrie Wilson (2:55)

Undertaker's music plays as Jones quickly scrambles out of the ring. He grabs a limp Ward and carries her over his shoulder to the back. Torrie takes the urn and holds it over her head as the Undertaker drops to one knee and lifts his arm to it.

We go backstage, where Kidman and Rey are watching the event.

Rey: "Damn, Billy, she looks scary there."

Kidman: "What do you mean?"

Rey: "I mean, the black everywhere, the gray face... man, she looks like a corpse! What do you think?"

Kidman: "I think I've never seen a more beautiful zombie in my life."

Kidman smiles as they walk to the curtain. They make sure to give Jones a wide berth as they head to congratulate Torrie and Taker. Torrie enters first, and as soon as she heads backstage, she drops the act and hugs Kidman.

Torrie: "How was that?"

Kidman: "You were so awesome out there!"

Torrie: "Thanks. I couldn't have done it without Taker's help."

She turns and tries to hand him the urn. Taker slowly grabs it from her and emotionlessly walks off. Torrie turns to Kidman and Rey. All three sense that something isn't normal.

We switch to Team Angle, which is calling a conference.

Kurt: "Guys, this has been a great week. First off, each of you beat those wannabes in the Kru -- great job. And now, your leader, Kurt Angle, is off to win the WWE Title. Wish me luck, guys."

Kurt walks off as his teammates cheer him on.

"Here Comes the Pain" plays as Brock Lesnar emerges from the back, jogging in place.

Chimel: "The following is a triple threat match scheduled for one fall and it is for the WWE Heavyweight Championship! Introducing first, from Minneapolis, MN, weighing in at 295 pounds, Brock Lesnar!"

Lesnar jumps onto the apron, setting off his pyro, then jogs in place, waiting for his opponents. "Medal" plays and the crowd begins their "You Suck" chant as Angle enters the arena.

Chimel: "And the opponent, from Pittsburgh, PA, weighing 245 pounds, the Olympic Hero, Kurt Angle!"

Angle enters the ring and twirls in place, then gets into a staredown with Brock. "VIVA GUERRERO!" cues a Latin rock mix as the champion enters, draped in the Mexican flag, to a huge ovation.

Chimel: "And their opponent, from El Paso, TX, weighing 220 pounds, he is the WWE Heavyweight Champion, Eddie Guerrero!"

Eddie enters the ring and folds the Mexican flag, handing it to the Spanish announce team. He gives the ref the WWE belt, then looks over both of his opponents.

WWE Title match: Eddie Guerrero (champion) vs. Kurt Angle (challenger) vs. Brock Lesnar (challenger)

Kurt charges Brock to begin with, pounding him around the head with fists. Eddie sneaks up behind Kurt and German suplexes him. As Eddie gets up, Brock hits a Steinerline on him, flipping him around. Brock gets one on a cover. Kurt charges Brock and hits him from behind, then as Brock turns around, Kurt nails an overhead suplex on him. Eddie heads to the apron and gets a slingshot senton on Brock, but as he gets to his feet, Kurt suplexes him. He covers for two.

Kurt pounds on Eddie and sends him into the ropes. Eddie slides under Kurt's feet on the rebound, and as Kurt turns around, Brock runs him over with a shoulderblock. Brock picks Kurt up and delivers a gutwrench suplex to him. As Brock stands, Eddie dropkicks Brock, who stumbles over Kurt, who rolls Brock up but Eddie saves. Kurt and Eddie pick Brock up and deliver a double suplex to him. As Eddie taunts Brock, Kurt comes up from behind and German suplexes him.

Kurt then sees Brock getting up and tries to bring him down with an amateur takedown. Brock keeps his feet, and as Brock and Angle wrestle for superiority, Eddie comes up and rams their heads together. Eddie goes to the apron, then hits a springboard bodyblock on both men at once.

Eddie picks Brock up and delivers a vertical suplex. He rolls through with the move and gives him a second vertical suplex. He rolls through with that, too, but as he prepares for the third vertical suplex, Kurt grabs him from behind. As Eddie gives Brock the third vertical suplex, Kurt gives Eddie a German suplex. Kurt rolls with the move and delivers a second German suplex. Kurt rolls through with that move and tries for a third German suplex, but Eddie ducks and Kurt is run over by a Steinerline from Brock.

Brock turns around, but Eddie ranas him, then backflips and hooks a figure-four. Kurt sees it and dives for the pile of legs, causing the break. Brock limps around as catches him from behind with the Angle Slam. Kurt goes for the cover, but Eddie saves. Eddie whips Kurt into the ropes and on the way out hits him with a back body drop. Unfortunately, this causes Kurt to land on Brock, and Eddie almost doesn't save in time.

Eddie picks Kurt up and gives him a vertical suplex. He rolls through with it, but Kurt reverses the vertical suplex and hits one of his own. Brock is getting up, so Kurt grabs the wounded leg of Brock and hits the Angle Lock. Brock screams in pain, but just as he's about to tap, Eddie charges and clotheslines Kurt over the top rope and to the floor. Eddie charges Brock, but gets pounded in the face. Brock sends Eddie into the ropes, hitting a gorilla press on the way out. Brock tosses Eddie onto Kurt on the outside.

Brock rams Kurt's back into the ringpost as Eddie climbs to his feet and starts clearing the Spanish announcers' table. Brock gets a head of steam and charges, but Kurt moves and Brock collides with the ringpost. Brock staggers back into Kurt, who tries an Angle Slam, but Brock lands on his feet. Kurt spins around straight into a punch from Eddie that staggers him into Brock. Brock picks Kurt up and F-5s him so that Kurt lands on (and breaks) the announcers' table.

Back in the ring, Eddie tries to go to the top rope, but Brock tosses him off. Brock catches a charging Eddie in an overhead suplex. He covers for two. Brock picks Eddie up and puts him in position for the F-5, but Eddie uses the momentum to hit Brock with a Tornado DDT. Eddie heads to the top rope, slaps his chest, and nails Brock with the Frog Splash as Kurt pulls himself slowly into the ring. Eddie covers, and the three-count beats Kurt's save by milliseconds.

WINNER and STILL WWE Heavyweight Champion: Eddie Guerrero (15:09)

Cole: "Eddie Guerrero has done it! Eddie Guerrero caps off an amazing Pay-Per-View extravaganza by retaining the WWE Championship! We're out of time, folks! Tune in to SmackDown! this Thursday on UPN! This is Michael Cole saying, so long everybody and congratulations to Eddie Guerrero, STILL the WWE Champion!"

<<<FIN>>>

*****

Total wrestling time: 1:44:06 out of 3 hours. WHEW.

Not enough room to give contest results. I'll save it for the next post.

Dukes

Edited May 30, 2004 by Dukes

[The Third Dukes]

Okay, contest results. But first, I was forced to muck around with three of the 11 eleven entries. Let me explain below...

* Tristy -- Tristy's entry gave each match a different number, but it used a 10 and a 0, both of which were out of bounds. Fortunately, due to each number being different, I just made the 10 a 9, the 0 a 1, and moved everything closer together to cover the gaps. Surprisingly, this did not change his score at all, as the net effect was 0.

* TheAce -- No confidence points make me a sad puppy. So I took it out on him. I felt like DQing his entry until I saw that he got 8 out of 9. So I simply made the one he missed the 9-pointer. That'll learn him.

* Steve Corino -- Stevie went back and fixed his confidence points, but in fixing them, he missed a spot. He had a 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, and... 9 again. I just made one of the 9s a 1. Didn't matter which one, since he got them both.

Amazingly, no one knew which match would open the show. I figured someone would guess correctly, and that the mystery partner would be the one stumping everyone. Shows what I know.

Oh, and this contest was MUCH harder than Backlash. At Backlash, the field had a 75.0% accuracy. Here, at Judgment Day, it was a mere 62.6% accuracy. That's cool for some odd reason.

And the final score is...

Steve Corino - 40

GCCWolverine - 39

TheAce - 38

rockyoursox - 36

Demon2K4 - 35

Ron326 - 34

jesse_ewiak - 31

peter - 29

Tristy - 27

Drunken Muppet - 25

Jam - 20

Steve, expect your prize in the PM as soon as it's possible to send it without spoiling anything. In the meantime, the moment you've all been waiting for...

*****

- The SmarK Rant for Judgment Day, May 16 / 04.

- Live from Hollywood.

- Your host is Michael Cole, as Jim Cornette is recovering from surgery. Damn, if ever there was a time to get somebody up...

- Opening match: 3 Live Kru v. Team Angle. Konnan debuts the "tosser" insult here. It's a huge brawl to start, naturally, and Konnan and Eric leave the ring. The double whip spot results in Dogg knocking over Shelton and Killings flying off of Dogg's back onto Haas, who chucks him out. Oops. WGTT get a double-team for two. Shelton with a T-Bone for two as Dogg becomes face-in-peril. Eric in as the crowd wants Konnan. Is there something in the water in LA? German suplex gets two for Eric. Haas with a missile dropkick and discus lariat DDP-style. Shelton with the leapfrog choke and an overhead suplex for two. Eric and Shelton hit the Doomsday Device. Eric tries the Ankle Lock, but he's not Kurt so Dogg escapes. Eric with a Hotshot and he goes up top. Killings shoves Eric off before he can miss^H^H^H^Htry the moonsault, though, and Dogg gets two. Eric with a belly-to-belly on Dogg. Shelton gets the Dragon Whip for two. Blinger Splash misses, hot tag Killings. Shelton's ass is kicked in several ways, and a top rope rana gets two. Shelton with the Flair Pin off of a distraction for two. Star-Spangled Blaster gets two as Killings gets into the face-in-peril mode. Haas tries a figure-four, but Killings cradles for two. Haas gets a German suplex ("Stay down!") and a facelock, adding shots with the knees before turning it into a suplex for two. Eric misses an Angle Slam, and Killings gets a spinkick. Stunner is blocked by Eric, but Killings gets a kneelift on the rebound, hot tag #2 to Konnan. Everyone goes flying, and heel miscommunication leads to BONZO GONZO. Killings dives to the outside, leaving Konnan to powerslam Eric for two. Tequlia Sunrise is stopped by Haas with a bulldog. Dogg tries the pumphandle slam, but Haas dropkicks him before the lift, and Eric gets the Angle Slam for the win at 17:28. A 20-minute match featuring Konnan, and I like it. I may have to turn in my smark card. **3/4

- Meanwhile, Torrie gives the techies some instructions.

- Jamie Noble v. Billy Gunn. Nidia is your referee, and everyone gets into an argument right off the bat. Gunn backs Noble into the corner and slugs away, but Nidia stops him. Noble slaps Gunn during the break. Noble gets a wristlock (which Gunn confuses with a wristwatch) and rides him down, and now Nidia tells Noble to quit the physicality. Remind me never to have Nidia referee a Benoit match. Gunn gets a Jackhammer out of the argument for two. He argues the count, so Noble rolls him up for an equally slow two. Gunn gets some CLUBBERIN' FOREARMS in, but Noble reverses a military press into a backdrop for two. Noble with Raven's clothesline/bulldog combo, but Nidia's bumped off of it. Noble runs over to check Nidia, who thinks it was all on purpose. Oh lord. And indeed, Gunn rolls up Noble for the lightning fast three at 5:04. All story and no substance. -*

- The RTC is backstage threatening to change the world and make Piper pay. That's nice.

- Hurricane v. Bull Buchanan. Bull is alone for this match, which sucks because if anyone needed distractions in his matches it's Bull. Or me, really. Bull wins the LOCKUP OF DOOM, but Hurricane ducks a second one and begins dropkicking Bull to the outside. Hurricane hits a plancha on Bull, but can't bring Bull back in. Bull runs over Hurricane, and a powerslam gets two. Big boot for Bull, but Hurricane avoids Snake Eyes. Sugar Smack and Shining Wizard get two for Hurricane. Bull with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker (ouch) off a charge. Springboard lariat gets two. Bull dumps Hurricane and prepares the mats for the Edge-Killer, but Hurricane gets a back body drop to stop it. Hurricane gets a swinging neckbreaker and a second plancha on Bull. Back in, crossbody off the top gets two. Sunset flip by Hurricane gets two. Blind charge misses, and a lariat by Bull gets two. A second tilt-a-whirl is turned into the Hurricane-rana, and Eye of the hurricane gets two. Bull shoves Hurricane into the ref, allowing him to remove a turnbuckle pad. Hurricane gets the Steamboat slam reversal for nothing. Hurricane revives the ref like a good little superhero, but Bull gets the CLUBBERIN' FOREARMS and punches Hurricane down for two. Bull catches Hurricane out of the ropes and drops him headfirst onto the turnbuckle. Scissors kick and flying legdrop finish at 12:58. I think this match qualifies as a minor miracle, and whatever was in the Kool-Aid backstage, please, keep using it. **1/2

- Meanwhile, Kidman isn't allowed to see Torrie's new outfit. This better be good.

- Los Maximos v. APA v. Shannon Moore and Bubba Rogers. This is a special added bonus match, and the winners will get a tag title shot at some point in the future. The Maximos have moved to Guadalajara and are over with the lucha-loving crowd. It's BONZO GONZO to start and it never really stops being that way. The APA beat on Rogers on the outside, which is smart. Moore floors both Maximos, then nails everyone on the outside with a tope. The Maximos soon follow. Back in, Bubba pounds on Jose, so Joel nails him with a calf kick. Joel tries to spear Bubba in the ropes, but Moore trips Bubba and Joel splats on the outside. Bradshaw cleans house now, getting two on Jose. Moore goes nuts on Bradshaw with a dropkick and rana, then gets a tornado DDT on Faarooq. Moore and Joel re-enact the Warrior/Rude suplex (with Jose playing Heenan) for two. The Maximos floor Bubba and delivers the moonsault sequence for two. Faarooq gets a spinebuster, but walks into a Bossman Slam from Bubba as the Maximos hit the Spanish Fly. Everything gets two before being saved. Bradshaw mugs Jose with the Clothesline from Heck, but Bubba slams down Bradshaw. Jose dropkicks Bubba into the ropes, and the Maximos double-team like crazy, ending in Jose getting a 450 to pin Faarooq at 9:22. As a spotfest, this was rather good, but as a match, forget it. *3/4

- WWE US Title: Rob Van Dam v. Matt Hardy. MATT FACTS! Matt practices yoga, and Matt is a US citizen. Matt plays RVD close to the vest, maintaining a headlock. Matt flips out of a backdrop and gets a German suplex for two. To the armbar, but RVD fights out of it, so Matt goes to the leg instead. Matt is finally forced to give RVD distance, and RVD begins kicking the crap out of Matt, who bails. RVD gets a baseball slide and pounds on Matt. Back in, Rolling Thunder gets two. Shoulder thrust combo is reversed by Matt to a DDT for two. Yodelling legdrop gets two. Back to the headlock, but RVD gets his splits/flip combo when he shoves out. Back to kicking at Matt, who's back to the outside. RVD airballs on a somersault plancha, and Matt bulldogs him on the rampway for good measure. Matt with a railrunner on RVD. Gutwrench suplex and low blow legdrop follow back in the ring, as Matt keeps RVD close by to avoid all them kicks. Of course, it fails, as Matt tries to kick RVD and gets hit with the stepover enzuigiri. Split-legged moonsault gets two. RVD tries a blind charge, but slams groinfirst into the turnbuckle. Twist of Fate gets the title at 10:46. Nice little mini-story there of Matt having a strategy, RVD using his kicks as an entry move, and Van Dam's recklessness costing him the match. I liked it MUCH more on second viewing. ***1/4

- Nidia sees Torrie in the makeup room and freaks out. Okay, then.

- Roddy Piper comes out to announce the mystery partner. He plays footage of himself telling Steven that if you can't do it yourself, don't show up. And Piper's always one to follow advice from a wise man...

- Sean Morley, Mark Henry, and Steven Richards v. Nova, Paul London, and Roddy Piper. Piper opens the match when he slams the mic into Steven's head, which draws a huge pop when the crowd realizes he's the mystery partner. Well, as a one-time thing I think I can live with it. It's a Pier Six to start, but we settle in with Morley working on Nova. Knee smashes and Russian legsweep get two. Henry tags in, and a slam and elbowdrop get two. To the bearhug, but Piper uses the EYEPOKE OF DOOM to break. Morley switches in, but the Moral High Ground misses. Piper and Steven enter, and Piper goes nuts on Steven with an airplane spin and testicular claw. Henry breaks and beats on Piper, but London stops the splash with a clothesline. Steven pounds on Piper as everyone returns for BONZO GONZO, but Piper hits an atomic drop. Contra Code, OLD SCHOOL SLEEPER OF DEATH, and Kryptonite Krunch finish at 7:26 as Nova finally gets one over on RTC. This falls into Piper's specialty category: Entertaining crap. *3/4

- WWE Tag Team titles, ladder match: Billy Kidman and Rey Misterio v. Team JAPAN. SuperCage footage plays during the entrance just to remind us how insane these guys are. And speaking of insane, Rey is so far over it's scary, as is Ultimo. No kidding, this could have been the main event. Ultimo suplexes Kidman as Rey ranas down Tajiri. Ultimo gets a double handspring kick on the champs, then DDTs Kidman as Rey does a tope con hilo on Tajiri. Ultimo tosses Kidman, who goes with the flow and nails a tope suicida on Rey and Tajiri. Ultimo says "what the heck" and Asais everyone on the outside. Heyman sends the ladder in, and Ultimo tries to climb, but Kidman slams Ultimo into the ladder. Kid Krusher is blocked as Ultimo tosses Kidman into a Tajiri roundhouse. Tajiri turns around into the West Coast Hop from Rey, who then powerbombs Ultimo off the ladder. Rey tries to climb, but Kidman accidentally knocks the ladder over. Ultimo gives Kidman a hiptoss onto the ladder, followed by a seated dropkick to the back. Rey monkey flips Ultimo to stop his offense. Tajiri sets the ladder up, so Rey gives him a neckbreaker to stop him and climbs. Ultimo yanks him off and goes for the Asai DDT, but Rey dodges. Ultimo lands on his feet, straight into the Kid Krusher. Tajiri hits the handspring elbow on Rey and the Tarantula on Kidman, which allows Rey to climb. Tajiri gets an electric chair drop to pull Rey off the ladder. Kidman dropkicks Ultimo into the ladder as Tajiri climbs, ending that threat. Kidman and Ultimo unleash the LUCHA VIOLENCE (Kidman? Do chops? Whatever) before Rey gets the 6-1-9 on Ultimo. Kidman climbs, but Tajiri catches him. Still, even off of a ladder, YOU CAN'T POWERBOMB KIDMAN. A second climb is interrupted by Ultimo with the Dragon Sleeper. Rey breaks with a missile dropkick. Ultimo and Rey both climb, and Kidman pulls the ladder away. Ultimo sends Kidman into the ladder with a drop toehold, but Tajiri charges into a series of armdrags. Ultimo climbs, but Tajiri gets tossed into the ladder. Ultimo lands on his feet, so Kidman slams him into the ladder as an exclamation point. Kidman and Tajiri meet at the top and fight while Heyman stops Rey from interfering. Rey gives Heyman a 6-1-9, which sends him flying into the ladder as Kidman and Tajiri crash. Ultimo takes over on Rey and tries to climb, but Kidman (who covers for Tajiri's injured foot by using the steps) returns, and the champs hit the Hop-Up rana on Ultimo off the ladder. Ultimo, bless him, takes the bump face-first. Ultimo rolls outside and helps Tajiri up, so Kidman nails a SHOOTING STAR DDT on the outside on the challengers! Holy $#|t! Meanwhile, Rey climbs until Heyman uses the GREEN MIST OF DOOM to stop him. Kidman returns and kicks ass on Heyman, only to be hit with a top-rope Asai DDT for his troubles. Rey gets a crucifix armbar (look, YOU come up with a name for it) on Ultimo as Tajiri hobbles up the ladder. Rey simply grabs Tajiri's bad foot to make him fall off. Ultimo and Rey race to the top and fight it out, but Kidman pins Ultimo's arms to his sides on the ladder (that's different), allowing Rey to get the titles at 22:58. Kidman and Rey help Tajiri to the back as the crowd delivers a standing ovation. And rightly so, because this was a pretty wild match, with everyone taking sick bumps (even Heyman went into the ladder once) and totally going nuts, and Kidman of course continues to re-invent the SSP on a daily basis. The injury, though, makes it hard to give this match everything because Tajiri really was limited near the end, and simply hitting the injured part is a lame way to get someone off a ladder. I'm going to get in trouble no matter what I put, but other than the injury to Tajiri, this match rocked in every way possible. ****3/4

- Nathan Jones and Shannon Ward v. Undertaker and Torrie Wilson. Michael Cole is the referee, but the crowd is pretty tired right now. Things change, though, when Taker re-emerges as the Deadman, complete with Torrie dressed as a mourner at a funeral, plus a makeup job that's supposed to make her look like Paul Bearer, but actually looks a lot like Ward's. At any rate, it has the desired effect. Faces no-sell everything, chokeslam for Jones, Tombstone for Ward (by Torrie!), goodbye at 2:55. DUD Jones carries Ward to the back, his monster image still intact, I guess. Not that I care. Taker and Torrie even do the urn thing.

- Backstage, the Filthy Animals greet Torrie, who was clearly play-acting. She returns the urn to Taker, who may or may not be doing this full-time. Interesting.

- Main event, WWE Title: Eddie Guerrero v. Brock Lesnar v. Kurt Angle. We are a little short on time thanks to the ladder match and Taker's big return. Kurt opens up on Brock to start, but Eddie gets a German on Kurt, only for Brock to nail a Steinerline on Eddie. Brock covers for one. Kurt gets an overhead suplex on Brock. Eddie with the slingshot senton, but he walks into a suplex from Kurt for two. Eddie ducks Kurt, who turns around into a freight train known as the Brock Express. Brock with a gutwrench suplex, but Eddie shoves Brock into a Kurt rollup for two. Double suplex on Brock, and Kurt gives Eddie a German to shut him up. Kurt and Brock go to the mat, getting all Olympic and/or NCAA on each other, before Eddie gives them a double noggin-knocker and springboard bodyblock. Cute. Eddie gets the rolling verticals on Brock, but Kurt grabs him on the third one and turns it into the rolling Germans. Very cool spot there. Brock gives Kurt a Steinerline (Eddie ducked) on the third German, though. Eddie gets the El Paso Lasso on Brock, and Kurt breaks. Angle Slam on Brock gets two. Eddie with a back body drop on Kurt, causing him to land on Brock for two. Eddie and Kurt suplex each other before Kurt gives Brock the Anklelock. Eddie sends Kurt to the outside to break. Brock tosses Eddie onto Kurt for fun. Brock goes medieval on Kurt, but Kurt ducks and Brock hits the STEEL post. Kurt tries an Angle Slam, but Brock lands on his feet. Eddie slugs out Kurt, and Brock F-5s him through the Spanish announce table FROM THE FLOOR. Okay, that's a new twist. Back in, Eddie goes up and gets slammed off. Overhead suplex by Brock gets two. Eddie reverses the F-5 to a Tornado DDT, and the Frog Splash finishes at 15:09. Shame about time running out, because I'm sure these guys had another 15 in them. Three-ways tend to be bad as a rule, but these guys kept everyone involved in just about every spot. ***1/2

The Bottom Line:

There's some good and some bad in this PPV, but the good FAR outweighs the bad. Knock Noble/Gunn off the show and it may be the best PPV all year. As it is, though, it's still very good, with unheard-of workrate from the most unusual suspects (Bull and Konnan) and a ladder match that just plain rules.

Thumbs up.

*****

May 17, 2004

WWE.com

Tonight, live from San Diego, California, we will see another LIVE edition of RAW break out on SpikeTV!

Chris Jericho made his grand return to the ring last week, teaming with Sting to take out Evolution! This week, Y2J will step into the ring against the de facto leader of Evolution, Randy Orton, and control of RNN is on the line! Will the Highlight Reel be back? Or is Jericho's comeback short-lived?

Last week, Christian became Intercontinental Champion, and in the process ensured Molly Holly would have to "be a Diva" this week. What does Christian mean by this? Can Molly go through with it? And could this be the first time in history we don't want a Diva to entertain us in that way?

Shawn Michaels was the victim of a brutal attack at the hands of Kane last week. He won't be in action tonight, but he has a few words to say about the Big Red Monster. How does Shawn feel about his brush with paralysis? Tune in LIVE at 9 / 8 Central to find out the answers!

All this and more -- including a special guest -- tonight on a LIVE edition of RAW! Tune in to the First Network for Men to catch all the action!

[Steve Corino]

Wow. This is the second time that the first time I predicted something, I won. When still under Jonnism Version 2 I scored in naiwf's Oracle, and now the first time I used your ROH scale I won. Go me, I guess.

I will await your PM.