Gold Cup 09!

[Guest Ringmaster]

So most teams have released their squads and the games start soon, so I thought I'd start this for the 3-4 of us that care.

Canada's roster:

* (1) Greg Sutton, goalkeeper (Unattached).

* (2) Adrian Cann, defence (Esbjerg fB/Denmark).

* (3) Mike Klukowski, defence/midfielder (Club Brugge KV/Belgium).

* (4) André Hainault, defence (Houston Dynamo/MLS).

* (5) Kevin McKenna, defence/midfielder (FC Köln/Germany).

* (6) Julian de Guzman, midfielder (Deportivo La Coruna/Spain).

* (7) Paul Stalteri, defence, midfielder (Borussia Mönchengladbach/Germany).

* (8) Marcel de Jong, midfielder (Roda JC/Netherlands).

* (9) Ali Gerba, forward (Unattached).

* (10) Willi Johnson, midfielder/forward (Real Salt Lake, MLS).

* (11) Richard Hastings, defence (Inverness CT/Scotland).

* (12) Issey Nakjima-Farran, midfielder (FC Nordsjælland/Denmark).

* (13) Atiba Hutchinson, midfielder (FC København).

* (14) Dejan Jakovic, defence (DC United/MLS).

* (15) Josh Simpson, midfielder/forward (FC Kaiserslautern/Germany).

* (16) Simeon Jackson, forward (Gillingham FC/England).

* (17) Jaime Peters, defence/midfielder (Ipswich Town FC/England).

* (18) Joshua Wagenaar, goalkeeper (Yeovil Town FC/England).

* (19) Kevin Harmse, defence/midfielder (Toronto FC/MLS).

* (20) Patrice Bernier midfielder (FC Nordsjaelland/Denmark).

* (21) Chris Pozniak, midfielder (Dundee FC/Scotland).

* (22) Kenny Stamatopoulos, goalkeeper (FC Lyn Oslo/Norway).

* (23) Charles Gbeke, forward (Vancouver Whitecaps FC/USL)

Aaaaand we're fucked. DeRo, Brennan, Friend, Begovic and Onstad weren't invited/have declined to attend and Gooz is injured, so hey, we're doomed! Just about weak everywhere

On the plus side, I'm interested to see what Jackson can do for us. He had a fantastic season, albeit in a lower league, so maybe we can have some wonder! Probably not though . Jakovic too. Not a bad player, so could be something there.

Also, Stephen Hart is a retard. Here are some quotes justifying his ability:

"Stephen Hart wouldn't know a good player if he molested him in the shower."

"He shouldn't be in charge of managing. He probably can't manage to sleep with his wife without the CSA telling what to do."

"Sometimes, you just have to wonder if Stephen Hart got his coaching badges in a Happy Meal box."

Okay, so two of these are from crazy fucking Uncle Ray, but you get the drift.

Anyways, as long as Honduras doesn't win (:@ :@ :@), good times for all!

Edited June 26, 2009 by Ringmaster

[METALMAN]

Richard Hastings is in the team?

In that case - yes, you are fucked.

[Guest Ringmaster]

He's a lifetime bencher!

[Zaz]

You have nothing to worry about, you'll walk it.

You have Paul Stalteri!

[ChrisSteeleAteMyHamster]

Simeon Jackson is a good little player....For the fourth tier of English football.

[The Quasi Juice]

Where is Owen Har...oh, and Jonathan de Guz....oh....

Go Marcel de Jong

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

I'm actually in favour of us leaving half our talented players out of the roster. TFC needs DeRo and Brennan if they're to have any chance at staying near the top, and this squad will tank so horribly that hopefully Hart gets fired. Win-win.

[HailtotheYo]

Gerba is actually with TFC now. Why the fuck would Friend/etc decline ? I mean, what the hell else competition are they going to play in for the National Team ?

Yeah, the US is sending a "weaker" side, but should still be strong enough to win it. I like the fact that Bradley is finally going to give some of the younger guys some real time on the squad though.

[foolinc]

The official US Roster for anyone who cares.

U.S GOLD CUP ROSTER

GOALKEEPERS (Club) caps/goals

Jon Busch (Chicago Fire) 1/0

Troy Perkins (IK Start/NOR) 1/0

Luis Robles (Kaiserslautern/GER) 0/0

DEFENDERS caps/goals

Steve Cherundolo (Hannover 96) 51/2

Jimmy Conrad (Kansas City Wizards) 24/1

Clarence Goodson (IK Start) 2/0

Jay Heaps (New England Revolution) 0/0

Chad Marshall (Columbus Crew) 4/1

Michael Parkhurst (FC Nordsjaellands/DEN) 5/0

Heath Pearce (Hansa Rostock) 23/0

MIDFIELDERS caps/goals

Davy Arnaud (Kansas City Wizards) 2/0

Kyle Beckerman (Real Salt Lake) 3/0

Colin Clark (Colorado Rapids) 0/0

Sam Cronin (Toronto FC) 0/0

Brad Evans (Seattle Sounders) 0/0

Stuart Holden (Houston Dynamo) 0/0

Logan Pause (Chicago Fire) 0/0

Robbie Rogers (Columbus Crew) 1/0

FORWARDS caps/goals

Freddy Adu (AS Monaco) 13/1

Brian Ching (Houston Dynamo) 36/9

Kenny Cooper (FC Dallas) 4/2

Charlie Davies (Hammarby IF) 9/2

Santino Quaranta (D.C. United) 11/0

[Hobo]

So its the US B team then?

[foolinc]

So its the US B team then?

Looks more like the C team to me. 7 uncapped players and 10 more with 5 caps or less. Still confused at why Jozy isn't playing. You'd think they'd want to give him as much playing time with Adu as possible.

[Guest Ringmaster]

I'm actually in favour of us leaving half our talented players out of the roster. TFC needs DeRo and Brennan if they're to have any chance at staying near the top, and this squad will tank so horribly that hopefully Hart gets fired. Win-win.

And you tell me I'm nearly not Canadian? Horrible. Toronto over your own country?! Silly Ontarionatistatinite, no wonder people vote Tory in the west! Evil, evil person.

That said, pleasantries aside, your scenario is a hooooorrible scenario. Ignoring the fact that Hart's gonna go get hung after the cups (most likely, word on the street being word on the street) because the CSA wants to restructure before an eventual Liberal goverment goes "lol, morons" and gets them to go get hung as well, there's also the problem with seeding.

This competition may seem utterly useless on paper (except if you want a nifty trip to Brazil in 2013, which, let's be honest, isn't a bad idea), it provides the basis for our WC seeding, especially given how little we play friendly games. And in case you haven't been paying attention, we're dangerously close to getting buttbanged by CONCACAF because of how awful we are. They've actually threatened to take our seeding away! Sure, this would basically mean we'd have to beat the Caracas Island before we beat St. Vincent and the Grenadines, but what it then leads too is us being in a group of severe pain and horror, especially in for the 014 WC, where, given how bad Mexico is as of late, the fellows over on those wacky fotball channels have shown the potential group for the pre-final league:

USA

Mexico

Jamaica

Canada.

How do you think we'll fair in that group? Basically, if we don't make it past the group stages (which, my head says we won't), then we're FWL until 2018!

Gerba is actually with TFC now. Why the fuck would Friend/etc decline ? I mean, what the hell else competition are they going to play in for the National Team ?

Well, essentially:

DeRo: Essentially doesn't really care or try when he plays for us, so not a big loss. Also he seems to have given up on ever reaching the WC given his age, so he's allegedly taking a runner.

Gooz: Injured

Brennan: Never picked by Hart.

Onstad: See DeRo.

Begovic: Claims his womanfriend will give birth during the tournament and has asked not to play.

Friend: Hart says he withdrew, Friend says he wasn't picked. I'm sure we'll know more at some point

They released the fixture list and I was thinking of hitting up a game, but going all the way to LA to see us lose doesn't rattle my bob and Columbus or Miami? Who the fuck wants to go there? Why can't they play in NYC or Boston or somewhere close :@

That said if we make it the QF that's in Philly, I'm there. I have plane tickets to spare

Edited June 27, 2009 by Ringmaster

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

Okay the seeding stuff is actually a fair point.

CANADA

CANADA

CANADA

...although with *that* lineup, we're fucked anyhow.

[Guest Ringmaster]

Apparently, Stevie Hart has stones! Also, depending on how this goes, a lack of a brain!

Word on the grass is that he chose not to pick Rob Friend because he's changing the way the team play. Now I have a mancrush on the Friendly giant as much as the other guy and he's had a terrific season, but when he plays, essentially what the team does is lob balls at him that either miss him completely or that he chests down and then THERE IS NO ONE. NO ONE EVER. IT'S LIKE THE PASS TO NO ONE.

But yeah, with De Guzman crocked, Hume dead at the hands of some limey thug and Brennan not playing, we're only left with Klukowski as a decent passer of the ball. So, apparently, we're not going to be playing a foot-passing game as opposed to ye olde HOOOOOOF. I have no idea, at all, how this will work. On paper it works well, because we're going to have a speedy midfield, but striker-wise? Gerba's meh, lol Gtebe and Jackson, well, he's speedy and all, but doing well in div 4 is one thing, I have no clue how he'll do against tougher opponents. I could see Simpson up there, though, that might work.

Well at the very least we're trying to change the system that indians us every other game! To potential insane failure, but hey, win some, lose some!

[Guest Ringmaster]

WE ARE GOING TO FUCK THOSE JAMAICAN SONS OF BITCHES IN THE ASS.

CANADA FUCK YEAH.

Too much?

Edited July 3, 2009 by Ringmaster

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

Game's on Sportsnet, which means Gerry Dobson and TEOL's favourite goalkeeper of all time on the call!

[Guest Ringmaster]

CRAIG FORREST HE'S OUR MAN IF HE CAN'T DO IT .... oh shit.

That is a genuine chant at Canada games, circa 02! I shit you not

[Mr Evil Guy]

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

CANADA CANADA

Ali Gerba was immense, as were the usual suspects (Klukowski, McKenna, Bernier, etc.) Sutton too. Simeon Jackson and Jagovic played with heart, but made a few too many mistakes for my liking.

[Green Demon]

DeGuzman To TFC?

Wasn't sure where else to post this since there really isn't a MLS thread but in looks like TFC is going to be paying big money to bring in de Guzman for the rest of the season. Not confirmed that he is moving but it sounds like there is a pretty good chance that it may happen.