Favourite Quotes

[Benji]

I figured this could make for a fun and simple little thread, just basically for posting quotes you enjoy from film, TV, books or whatever.

Tons of my favourites come from Fight Club, but two of my top ones are basically rants by Tyler. Spoilered for the all of two people who haven't seen it:

Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.

Tyler Durden, 'Fight Club'

Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

Tyler Durden, 'Fight Club'

[OctoberRaven]

Pretty much everything from The Warriors.

Was going to type out THE SPEECH but fuck it, this is simpler.

Various other quotes and one-liners:

"We gonna get japped here, we gonna get japped!"

"Hey, you didn't pay for that" "FER WHAT?!"

"Hey I got a question... why are we running?" (beat) "I told ya, they were a buncha wimps."

"I'm gonna shove that bat up your ass and turn you into a popsicle" (fun trivia: This line? Ad-Lib!)

"No reason. I just like doing things like that."

"One on one? You're crazy. You're dead."

And of course, the bottle scene, but I'm not even going to bother linking that because seriously how can you possibly not have seen it.

EDIT- Also, I do enjoy referencing Death Race 2000 (NOT the shitty Jason Stathem movie, the awesomely cheesy 70s movie starring David Carradine and Slyvester Stallone). Namely "FRANKENSTEIN SCORES!" and "It just goes to show you that even the fearsome Frankenstein has a red-blooded American sense of humor. Ha, ha, ha."

Edited November 11, 2014 by OctoberRavenO

[EddieG]

And of course, the bottle scene, but I'm not even going to bother linking that because seriously how can you possibly not have seen it.

I haven't..

As for one of my quotes.. or well speeches really, it's a damn long quote.

Another one would have to be "Sanka, you dead, man?"

[OctoberRaven]

And of course, the bottle scene, but I'm not even going to bother linking that because seriously how can you possibly not have seen it.

I haven't..

Link

[I Don't Mind]

Made a big collection of favorite quotes from a Reddit Thread on the topic a while ago. Spoilered for length

• “When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.” Thomas Jefferson
  
• "Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder." - George Washington.
  
• “When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” - 1 Corinthians 13:11
  
• “There is one kind of robber whom the law does not strike at, and who steals what is most precious to men: time.” – Napoleon I of France
  
• “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” -George Bernard Shaw
  
• "If you don't know where you're going, any road will get you there.” -Lewis Carol
  
• "Just one more dollar." John D. Rockefeller answering “How much money does it take to make a man happy?”
  
• “Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.” - Mark Twain
  
• "Don’t cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." -Dr. Seuss
  
• "Democracy is two wolves and a sheep voting on what’s for dinner" - Ben Franklin
  
• "No one raindrop thinks it caused the flood" (Chinese proverb)
  
• “I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.” - Albert Einstein
  
• "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." - Mark Twain
  
• “Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.” – Confucius
  
• “The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.” - Samuel Johnson.
  
• "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." - Abraham Lincoln
  
• “Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for -- in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.” — Ellen Goodman
  
• “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” - John Watson
  
• “Do not wish for easier lives, wish to be stronger men.” - John F. Kennedy
  
• "You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." - Winston Churchill
  
• “Success is the sole earthly judge of right and wrong” – Hitler
  
• “War does not determine who is right, only who is left.” - Bertrand Russell
  
• "No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it." - Terry Pratchett
  
• “The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike, than those who think differently.” – Nietzsche
  
• "A ship in port is safe...but that is not what ships are made for" - Grace Murray Hopper
  
• "Once the game is over, the King and the Pawn go back in the same box." - Italian Proverb
  
• “In the midst of winter, I finally found that there was in me an invincible summer.” - Albert Camus

[ChrisSteeleAteMyHamster]

Movie quotes? Okie dokie!

Gosford Park

“Henry Denton: You Brits really don't have a sense of humour do you?
Elsie: We do if something's funny, sir.”

Apocalypse Now

Kurtz: We train young men to drop fire on people, but their commanders won't allow them to write "fuck" on their airplanes because it's obscene!

2001: A Space Odyssey

HAL: I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid.

[TheWho87]

So let me get this straight. You wanna fly on a magic carpet to see the king of the Potato People and plead with him for your freedom, and you're telling me you're all completely sane?

- Arnold Judas Rimmer

[OctoberRaven]

And now, quotable Street Fighter: The One Where Raul Julia Goes Out In A Blaze Of Hammy Glory

Bison: "For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day in your life. But for me... it was Tuesday."

Guile: (After told to tell his troops not to attack after being relieved of command) "I'd like to, but some idiot just canned me."

Zangeif: (Seeing a fuckload of explosives heading their way over TV) "Quick! Change the channel!"

Dee Jay: "Because you idiot, he paid me a friggin' fortune!" Zangeif: "...You got... paid?!"

(after being tortured by a former boxing heavyweight champion. no, really, look it up) Honda: "I'm sumo brudda, my body can be in one place, my mind another." Balrog: "Do me a favor. Next time your mind leaves, tell it to bring back a pizza."

Bison: "This is merely superconductive electromagnetism. Surely you've heard of it. It levitates bullet trains from Tokyo to Osaka. It levitates my desk, where I ride the saddle of the world. And it levitates... ME!!!"

Bison: "Something wrong, Colonel? You come here prepared to fight a madman, and instead you found... A GOD?!"

Bison: (after Sagat is surprised that Guile is still alive) "OF COURSE! He faked his death to ingratiage his spies with you." (Covers his eye) "But I guess you didn't SEE that did you?"

(after explaining his grand design of a utopia, motioning to a model of his future capital) Bison: "...But the food court should be bigger, all the major chains will want in."

Edited November 11, 2014 by OctoberRavenO

[Draevyn]

And now, quotable Street Fighter: The One That's Not Street Fighter In Name Only

Bison: "For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day in your life. But for me... it was Tuesday."

Guile: (After told to tell his troops not to attack after being relieved of command) "I'd like to, but some idiot just canned me."

Zangeif: (Seeing a fuckload of explosives heading their way over TV) "Quick! Change the channel!"

Dee Jay: "Because you idiot, he paid me a friggin' fortune!" Zangeif: "...You got... paid?!"

(after being tortured by a former boxing heavyweight champion. no, really, look it up) Honda: "I'm sumo brudda, my body can be in one place, my mind another." Balrog: "Do me a favor. Next time your mind leaves, tell it to bring back a pizza."

Bison: "This is merely superconductive electromagnetism. Surely you've heard of it. It levitates bullet trains from Tokyo to Osaka. It levitates my desk, where I ride the saddle of the world. And it levitates... ME!!!"

Bison: "Something wrong, Colonel? You come here prepared to fight a madman, and instead you found... A GOD?!"

Bison: (after Sagat is surprised that Guile is still alive) "OF COURSE! He faked his death to ingratiage his spies with you." (Covers his left eye) "But I guess you didn't SEE that did you?"

(after explaining his grand design of a utopia, motioning to a model of his future capital) Bison: "...But the food court should be bigger, all the major chains will want in."

The whole speech that quote came from was awesome.

[OctoberRaven]

Actually it was. Let me see if I could find it...

Colonel William F. Guile: [solemnly] Troopers, I just received new orders. Our superiors say the war is cancelled. We can all go home. Bison is getting paid off for his crimes, and our friends who have died here will have died for nothing. But, we can all go home. Meanwhile, ideals like peace, freedom, and justice, they get packed up. But, we can all go home.
[angrily]
Colonel William F. Guile: Well, I'm not going home. I'm gonna get on my boat, and I'm going up river, and I'm going to kick that son of a bitch Bison's ass so hard that the next Bison wannabe is gonna feel it! Now, who wants to go home... and who wants to go with me?
[the troopers cheer]

Really an underrated movie overall, probably because it was marketed as straight up action when it was really action-comedy. Ages pretty well too, especially compared to Chun-Li which felt like just a really bad kung-fu movie script with Street Fighter character names added in. Glenn Beck-looking Bison in a suit and not a wannabe dictator instead just a random drug dealer =

[GhostMachine]

That speech by Guile is quite possibly the greatest bit of dialogue that JCVD has ever uttered on film.

Street Fighter is actually one of my favorite video game based movies, aside from the first Mortal Kombat (Annihilation stinks on ice). You've got JCVD being awesome, Raul Julia hamming it up, and Ming Na looking hot (she still does!).

A couple of my favorite movie quotes:

"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum". - Rowdy Roddy Piper as Nada, in They Live

"When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, and he looks you crooked in the eye and he asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like that: "Have ya paid your dues, Jack?" "Yessir, the check is in the mail." - Kurt Russell as Jack Burton, in Big Trouble In Little China.

[Benjamin]

Street Fighter is the best movie ever.

[Drock007]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEOOZDbMrgE

[Ant]

Red Dwar alert (probably the most underrated comedy ever):

Rimmer: "I've seen Westerns, I know how to speak cowboy."

[steps up to the bar]

Rimmer: "Dry white wine and Perrier, please."

- Rimmer, Gunmen of the Apocalypse

I'm so gorgeous, there's a six month waiting list for birds to suddenly appear, every time I am near!"

- Cat, Back in the Red

Rimmer [on owing 8500 in tax]: What? This is wrong! This is dead wrong!

Lister: It doesn't matter now. Not gonna catch you now, are they?

Rimmer: Just because we're three million years into deep space and the human species is extinct? That means nothing to these people. They'll find us.

- Rimmer and Lister, Better Than Life

Kryten: With respect sir, you think Jesus was a hippie.

Rimmer: Well, he was. He had long hair and he didn't have a job. What more do you want?

- Kryten and Rimmer, Demons & Angels

[TheWho87]

Guess you will enjoy these

Look, I'm trying to navigate at faster than the speed of light, which means that before you see something, you've already passed through it. Even with an IQ of 6000, it's still brown-trousers time.

- Holly (Future Echoes)

David Lister, Technician, 3rd class. Captain's remarks: "Has requested sick leave due to diarrhea on no less than 500 occasions. Left his previous job as a supermarket trolley attendant after ten years because he didn't want to get tied down to a career. Promotion prospects: zero."

- Holly (Waiting For God)

Arnold Rimmer, Technician, 2nd Class. Captain's remarks: "There's a saying amongst the officers: If a job's worth doing, it's worth doing well. If it's not worth doing, give it to Rimmer. He aches for responsibility, yet constantly fails the Astro-navigation exam. Astoundingly zealous, possibly mad; probably has more teeth than brain cells. Promotion prospects: comical."

- Holly (Waiting For God)

Hey, this has been a really good day. I've eaten five times, I've slept six times, and I've made a lot of things mine. Tomorrow, I'm gonna see if I can't have sex with something.

- Cat (Confidence and Paranoia)

Abandon ship! Abandon ship! Black hole approaching! This is not a drill. This is a drill! [pneumatic drill sound] Abandon shi- Oh God, now the siren's bust.... Awooga! Awooga! Abandon ship!

- Holly (Marooned)

Erm, I think we're losing sight of the real issue here, which is: what are we gonna call ourselves? Erm, and I think it comes down to a choice between "The League Against Salivating Monsters" or my own personal preference, which is "The Committee for the Liberation and Integration of Terrifying Organisms and their Rehabilitation Into Society." Erm, one drawback with that: the abbreviation is "CLITORIS."

- Rimmer (Polymorph)

At least he gets 24 hours notice, that's more than most of us get. Most of us get "Mind that bus!" "What bus?" "Splat!"

- Rimmer (The Last Day)

Its not a quote but this has to be one of my top scenes from the show

[Ant]

I loved the bit in Series 8. (Forgot the name of the episode..where they were put in jail by Hollister and Rimmer and Lister are speaking to an iname with a petbird

Birdman: This is Pete. They call me Birdman

Lister: Oh yeah? Why Birdman?

Rimmer: Because he really likes Instant Custard. why do you think??

[OctoberRaven]

As much as I love Red Dwarf, let's also show some love to The Young Ones.

"We wish for you to be the ship's cook and concubine"

"What's a concubine?"

"It's a small, spiky-haired mammal."

"That's a hedgehog!"

"In that case, we wish for you to be the ship's cook and hedgehog."

"This calls for a special blend of psychology and extreme violence."

"I hope Mike comes back soon with the cure!"

"No Neil, it's Madness this week."

"First we're going to have Sex With The Headless Astronaut."

"In the drawing room? Won't the carpet get bloody?"

"It's a video nasty!"

"It's a carpet, farty!"

(As they plan to kill the South African Vampire)

"I'll get the steak!"

"I'll get the car!"

"I'm not really foreign, you know. I just do it to appear more sophisticated. I mean, nobody'd buy Evian water if it was called Blackburn water, would they? Nobody'd wear Kicker boots if they were made in Scunthorpe! ABBA? ABBA, Swedish?! I knew them when they were a Lancashire clog dancing trio! Arthur, Betty, Boris and Angela!" (counting off the members, looking at his hand, shaking his head) "Solzhenitsyn, Solzhenitsyn? A former pipe-fitter welder from Harrogate!"

Edited November 14, 2014 by OctoberRavenO

[Ant]

Neil comes out with some classics too:

Rik: Neil, do you dig graves?

Neil: Yeah they're alright Rik

Neils Mum: Neil, did you make your bed?

Neil: No, i bought it.

[TheSqauredCircleMessiah]

The entire movie Clue and just about anything from Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves

[Mick]

One of the finest moments in the history of Star Trek:

*Sisko punches Garak*

Sisko: Get up! You killed him!

Garak: That's right.

Sisko: That's what you planned to do all along, isn't it? You knew the data rod wouldn't hold up to scrutiny. You just want to get him on the station so that you could plant a bomb on the shuttle.

Garak: It wasn't quite that simple. I did have hopes that the rod would somehow pass inspection, but I suspected that Tolar may not have been up to the task.

Sisko: And what about Tolar? Did you kill him, too?!

Garak: Think of them both as tragic victims of war.

*Sisko punches Garak again*

Garak: If you can allow your anger to subside for a moment, you'll see that they did not die in vain! The Romulans will enter the war!

Sisko: There's no guarantee of that!

Garak: Oh, but I think that there is. You see, when the Tal Shiar finishes examining the wreckage of Vreenak's shuttle they'll find the burnt remnants of a Cardassian optolythic data rod which somehow miraculously survived the explosion. After painstaking forensic examination, they'll discover that the rod contains a recording of a high-level Dominion meeting at which the invasion of Romulus was being planned.

Sisko: And then they'll discover that it is a fraud!

Garak: Oh, I don't think they will, because any imperfections in the forgery will appear to be a result of the explosion. So, with a seemingly legitimate rod in one hand, and a dead Senator in the other, I ask you, Captain, what conclusion would you draw?

Sisko: That Vreenak obtained the rod on Soukara, and that the Dominion killed him to prevent him from returning to Romulus with it.

Garak: Precisely. And the more the Dominion protests it's innocence, the more the Romulans will believe they're guilty, because it's exactly what the Romulans would have done in their place. That's why you came to me, isn't it, Captain? Because you knew I could do those things that you weren't capable of doing. Well, it worked, and you'll get what you want. A war between the Romulans and the Dominion. And if your conscience is bothering you, you can soothe it with the knowledge you that may have just saved the entire Alpha Quadrant, and all it cost was the life of one Romulan Senator, one criminal, and the self-respect of one Starfleet officer. I don't know about you, but I'd call that a bargain.