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lol, FIFA


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Here's a round-up of what we discovered from Fifa's news conference so far:
  • Fifa insists Friday's presidential election will go ahead as planned.
  • Fifa spokesman Walter De Gregorio: "The president (Sepp Blatter) is not involved, how can you say he has to step down? He is the president, if he is re-elected then he is the president for the next four years."
  • De Gregorio confirms the 2018 and 2022 World Cups will go ahead as planned in Russia and Qatar.
  • De Gregorio: "While the timing may not obviously be the best, Fifa welcomes this process and co-operates fully."
  • "It is certainly a difficult moment for Fifa," acknowledges De Gregorio.
  • "You don't believe me but I say again this for Fifa is good," he adds. "It's not good in terms of image and reputation but in terms of cleaning up this is good."
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Written FIFA statement:

FIFA welcomes actions that can help contribute to rooting out any wrongdoing in football. We understand that today’s actions by the Swiss Federal Office of Justice on behalf of the US authorities and the Swiss Office of the Attorney General (initiated by FIFA through the submission of the file on the 2018/2022 FIFA World Cup bidding process) relate to different matters.
Firstly, the arrest of six individuals this morning in Zurich concerns investigations by the US Attorney’s Office for the Eastern District of the State of New York. The Swiss authorities, acting on behalf of their US counterparts, arrested the individuals for activities carried out in relation with CONCACAF and CONMEBOL business.
The second instance follows FIFA’s initiative of presenting the file on the 2018/2022 FIFA World Cup™ bidding process to the Swiss Office of the Attorney General in November 2014. The authorities are taking the opportunity of the FIFA Congress to interview those FIFA Executive Committee members who are not Swiss residents who voted back in 2010 and are still in office.
Today, the Swiss Office of the Attorney General announced that it has opened criminal proceedings against persons unknown in relation to the 2018/2022 FIFA World Cup™ bidding process. FIFA is fully cooperating with the investigation and is supporting the collection of evidence in this regard. As noted by the Swiss authorities, this collection of evidence is being carried out on a cooperative basis.
We are pleased to see that the investigation is being energetically pursued for the good of football and believe that it will help to reinforce measures that FIFA has already taken.
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  • Fifa spokesman Walter De Gregorio: "The president (Sepp Blatter) is not involved, how can you say he has to step down? He is the president, if he is re-elected then he is the president for the next four years."

Uhm, maybe because even if he's not directly involved (lol), he has to at least be aware that for the last two decades an incredible amount of immoral and likely illegal behaviour has happened under his essentially dictatorial watch.

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Written FIFA statement:

FIFA welcomes actions that can help contribute to rooting out any wrongdoing in football. We understand that todays actions by the Swiss Federal Office of Justice on behalf of the US authorities and the Swiss Office of the Attorney General (initiated by FIFA through the submission of the file on the 2018/2022 FIFA World Cup bidding process) relate to different matters.

Firstly, the arrest of six individuals this morning in Zurich concerns investigations by the US Attorneys Office for the Eastern District of the State of New York. The Swiss authorities, acting on behalf of their US counterparts, arrested the individuals for activities carried out in relation with CONCACAF and CONMEBOL business.

The second instance follows FIFAs initiative of presenting the file on the 2018/2022 FIFA World Cup bidding process to the Swiss Office of the Attorney General in November 2014. The authorities are taking the opportunity of the FIFA Congress to interview those FIFA Executive Committee members who are not Swiss residents who voted back in 2010 and are still in office.

Today, the Swiss Office of the Attorney General announced that it has opened criminal proceedings against persons unknown in relation to the 2018/2022 FIFA World Cup bidding process. FIFA is fully cooperating with the investigation and is supporting the collection of evidence in this regard. As noted by the Swiss authorities, this collection of evidence is being carried out on a cooperative basis.

We are pleased to see that the investigation is being energetically pursued for the good of football and believe that it will help to reinforce measures that FIFA has already taken.

Tl:dr - "Nothing to do with us, no sireee!"

I'm assuming that anyone arrested/involved with the investigation will be thoroughly hung out to dry by FIFA, to ensure that any accusations they throw at Blatter can be met with, "what, you trust the word of this criminal?"

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I get the feeling it won't lead to any large scale changes to the corruption within FIFA, but if it sends some of the most corrupt guys in the organastiation to prison for 20+ years it'll be worth it.

They've timed it so well that it didn't give anyone the time to prepare, saying that, it wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if there's some offshore accounts that are safe and will allow a bunch of officials to disappear off the face of the earth.

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I'm under no illusion of it happening, but genuinely hope that this leads to national and continental FA's agreeing to just call a rampantly corrupt organisation what it is and try and start over.

What would they call the Fifa games then? :o

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Richard Weber, chief of the IRS criminal investigation: This really is the World Cup of fraud, he says, and today we are issuing Fifa a red card.

:facepalm:

Followed up by accusing the residents of <insert town here> of being tax cheats.

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