Jump to content

Eurovision Song Contest 2022


Lineker

Recommended Posts

The Kraigy Ratings are in!

Czechia:
Voice: Okay.
Music: Okay.
Tune: Generic.
Presentation: Awesome.
5/10

Romania:
Voice: Good.
Music: Great!
Tune: Loved.
Presentation: Alright.
7/10

Portugal:
Voice: Enchanting.
Music: Relaxing.
Tune: Chill.
Presentation: Simple.
7/10

Finland:
Voice: Rasptastic.
Music: Upbeat.
Tune: Head-bobber.
Presentation: BALLOONS.
BONUS POINT: It's the fucking Rasmus.
6/10

Switzerland:
Voice: Husky.
Music: Simple.
Tune: Never really got started.
Presentation: Bit lame.
3/10

France:
Voice: Not great.
Music: Clashing.
Tune: Tribal.
Presentation: Meh.
4/10

Norway:
Voice: Surprisingly great.
Music: Pretty basic.
Tune: Catchy.
Presentation: Odd costuming, but surprisingly simple.
5/10

Armenia:
Voice: Tremendous!
Music: Weirdly familiar. Stolen?
Tune: Roadtrip!
Presentation: Creative!
8/10

Italy:
Voice: Strained.
Music: Basic.
Tune: Indecisive.
Presentation: A classic duet.
3/10

Spain:
Voice: Great, even with the dancing!
Music: Overdone.
Tune: *dances*
Presentation: OwO
6/10

Netherlands:
Voice: Beautiful.
Music: Heartfelt.
Tune: Powerful.
Presentation: Simple.
BONUS POINT: Making Dutch sound beautiful.
7/10

Ukraine:
Voice: ON POINT.
Music: Funky.
Tune: Hybrid brilliance.
Presentation: Traditional dancing meets break dancing?
BONUS POINT: Fuck Russia.
7/10

Germany:
Voice: Okay, not a great delivery.
Music: Disappointing after the stage set up.
Tune: Weirdly familiar. Stolen?
Presentation: Ornamental instruments...
3/10

Lithuania:
Voice: Captured me immediately.
Music: Seductive.
Tune: If Lithuania has a James Bond, he needs this song.
Presentation: Retro!(?)
7/10

Azerbaijan:
Voice: Rough then amazing!
Music: Subtly effective.
Tune: Built well.
Presentation: Sandow spectacular.
7/10

Belgium:
Voice: Great!
Music: Basic.
Tune: Familiar. Reminds me of Dirty Diana for some reason.
Presentation: Snooze.
5/10

Greece:
Voice: Haunting.
Music: Very complimentary.
Tune: Builds well.
Presentation: I think I'm in love.
7/10

Iceland:
Voice: Whispery.
Music: Dreamy.
Tune: Never really gets going.
Presentation: Little House on the Volcano.
4/10

Moldova:
Voice: Balkan Ramones.
Music: Rather repetitive.
Tune: Grab your partner by the dick!
Presentation: Basic for Zdob si Zdub.
BONUS POINT: Not just a Eurovision entity to me.
5/10

Sweden:
Voice: Weirdly familiar. Why is her voice so familiar?
Music: Thumping.
Tune: Nice build.
Presentation: I think I'm in love again.
5/10

Australia:
Voice: Powerful!
Music: Basic.
Tune: This almost felt a capella. Bit too vocal.
Presentation: Stunning.
6/10

UK:
Voice: Holy shit, this guy can sing!
Music: Basic.
Tune: This feels very Elton.
Presentation: Spacey.
6/10

Poland:
Voice: Tremendous. Maybe the best male vocalist so far.
Music: Loved the mix.
Tune: Really nice contrast throughout.
Presentation: Kevin Dunne.
8/10

Serbia:
Voice: WTF.
Music: WTF.
Tune: WTF.
Presentation: WTF.
2/10

Estonia:
Voice: Hunky.
Music: Weirdly refreshing.
Tune: Yeehaw!
Presentation: Meh.
5/10

Somehow, that means Poland and Armenia are my overall favourites. :)
 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Loved the UK song but can't help but think at least a little bit of that jury result is a "see what happens if you actually try?" thing.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mad how we actually go towards doing a Eurovision style song we do alright rather then doing a boring ballard by someone's brother 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Lineker said:

We'd have gotten away with it, if it wasn't for that meddling Putin!

The senseless murder of the countless men, women and children was one thing but he just made this personal.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. To learn more, see our Privacy Policy