NWA:TNA -- Russo's Revenge!

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, April 30, 2003

As you may remember, this is the day I had to make a decision about the wrestlers that are less than 60 over. The hardest decision involved America’s Most Wanted, who are the only ones this edict covers who were here when I arrived. They survived Bob Armstrong’s roster purge, and even held the Tag Team titles briefly. However, at this time they don’t have the talent or charisma to fit in with our long-term plans. We have many guys in development that are far more talented. Yesterday we said goodbye to them on television, and transitioned their manager, New Jack, into a new program. In addition to Chris Harris and James Storm, also leaving the company today is The Damaja, Invader #1, Joe E. Legend, Scott Vick, Johnny Swinger, Dr. Wagner Jr., Shark Boy, Nathan Jones, Lash LeRoux, Steve Bradley, and Bison Smith.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait tonight’s main event, featuring Bill Goldberg challenging Masato Tanaka!

Kavovit: Last night on XPlosion, New Jack became the manager for the three Hardcore Japanese wrestlers, costing Malice his match against Akira Taue. As a result, Percy Pringle demanded this match for tonight.

Snake: Another one of the Hardcore Japanese wrestlers, Ebessan, will be taking on Sonny Siaki in a X-division match.

Kavovit: Another member of SEX, Disco Inferno, will be taking on Curt Hennig later. But earlier today, we got these words from Sonny Siaki and New Jack with regards to tonight’s Siaki/Ebessan match.

On the video screen, Sonny Siaki runs down Ebessan. He tells us that last night Ebessan proved he wasn’t a challenge for Siaki, since he couldn’t even beat Jody Fleisch. He tells Ebessan to get ready to go back to Japan with his tail between his legs.

OR: 72

The video screen goes black for a moment, and then New Jack appears with Ebessan to the delight of the fans. New Jack admits he don’t know much about this flippity-floppity X division, but he does know that Ebessan can kick Sonny Siaki’s ass. He warns Vince Russo not to get involved, or else he’ll really be forked!

OR: 78

The video screen goes black again, and the camera cuts to the ring, where Ron Killings stands with a microphone. He tells us in a minute he’s going to be facing Perry Saturn. He talks about how versatile Saturn is, competing in Hardcore matches, X-division matches, and even having some fine technical matches. The Truth is that tonight he’s in a X-division match with Killings, and he’s not as good in that style as Killings is.

OR: 90

Ron Killings vs. Perry Saturn: Killings proves himself to be right, as the match starts out fast-paced and Killings controls Saturn. However, Saturn dodges a dropkick and immediately slows down the pace, turning it into a technical match. The fans are fairly quiet, surprised at this turn of events. But they get involved near the end, when Killings hits a jawbreaker to regain the advantage. A very short time later, he hits the Truth Or Consequences for the pin. Afterwards, they shake hands. A nice end to a good match.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 72

CR: 64

MQ: 80

Backstage, Disco Inferno talks trash about Curt Hennig. He tells us that Hennig may be the better wrestler, but he can’t dance anywhere near as good as Disco Inferno.

OR: 84

(Disco Inferno gained in over from 74 to 76.)

The camera finds Hennig watching Disco on the monitor. Wow, somebody’s actually watching this! Hennig points out this won’t be a dancing contest, but a wrestling contest.

OR: 81

Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): A very good match – oh wait, I already said this was a X-division match. Typical of the division, the action is fast and furious, with both men gaining and losing the advantage. Russo is obviously afraid of New Jack, and never even tries to interfere. However, Siaki shows that Russo’s assistance wasn’t necessary. He scores the pin after the Money Clip. New Jack immediately slides into the ring, preventing Siaki from even attempting a beatdown.

Winner: Sonny Siaki

OR: 77

CR: 69

MQ: 86

Backstage, Percy Pringle is in Bill Goldberg’s locker room, and Goldberg is in the background, pacing back and forth. Pringle is laughing, of course. He tells New Jack to get used to losing, because Masato Tanaka will lose just like Ebessan did. Goldberg pushes Pringle aside and tells Tanaka that he’s next.

OR: 68

(Bill Goldberg dropped in over from 88 to 86.)

Meanwhile, Masato Tanaka and Akira Taue are sitting in their dressing room when New Jack comes in, with Ebessan leaning against him. Taue helps Ebessan to the couch, while New Jack walks to Tanaka and slaps him! Then he picks up a chair and hits him over the head! Then he asks Tanaka if he’s ready for Goldberg, and he nods his head. This brings a smile to New Jack’s face.

OR: 80

Curt Hennig vs. Disco Inferno (with Vince Russo): Hennig, the veteran, wisely avoids Russo’s side of the ring as much as possible, and once again Russo isn’t able to help his man. No interviews, no help, I wonder why he even showed up? Disco takes too much time playing to the fans whenever he does get the advantage, which allows Hennig time to recover. In the end, Hennig nails a Hennig Plex for the pin.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 76

CR: 78

MQ: 72

Masato Tanaka (with New Jack) vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Television time is almost out, so you know this is going to be a quick match. Goldberg dominates for three minutes, but when he goes for the Spear, Tanaka moves and Goldberg hits the post. Tanaka goes right for the Roaring Elbow, which puts Goldberg down. Tanaka covers him, and Goldberg doesn’t kick out in time! New Jack pulls Tanaka out of the ring as Goldberg goes nuts, kicking the ropes and punching the turnbuckles. Pringle appears to be going into shock.

Winner: Masato Tanaka

OR: 81

CR: 78

MQ: 85

(Bill Goldberg dropped in over from 86 to 85.)

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 6520

Best segment: Interview with Ron Killings (90)

Worst segment: Interview with Percy Pringle & Bill Goldberg (68)

Best match: Masato Tanaka over Bill Goldberg (81)

[LoveMuscle]

Thursday, May 1, 2003

The falling industry has taken a toll. Today, IPW Hardcore, Future Of Wrestling, World Xtreme Wrestling, Extreme Canadian Championship Wrestling, World League Wrestling, and All Pro Wrestling all announced that they are no longer financially able to put on matches, and these companies have folded. Also, Major League Wrestling has issued a bankruptcy notice, and our financial experts predict they will fold at the end of this month.

Percy Pringle came to me after the show last night and told me that he thought he wasn’t doing a very good job as a manager any more, and wanted to quit that part of the business. He offered to stay on as a non-wrestler, and for now I have accepted. Really, I don’t know how long I’ll hold on to him in that capacity, but we’ll see.

Steven Kavovit assures me that there will probably be some wrestlers ready to be promoted from Japan next month but nothing this month. Also, we’ve signed a few new performers from the now-defunct promotions, but they have been assigned to training camp or NWA Japan. With no new additions, here’s what our active roster looks like today (faces in blue, heels in red, tweeners in black, all followed by their current over):

MAIN EVENT

Sting (98)

UPPER MIDCARD

Ron Killings (89)

Jeff Jarrett (86)

Curt Hennig (84)

Road Warrior Hawk (81)

Road Warrior Animal (78)

MIDCARDERS

Jody Fleisch (86)

Ken Shamrock (85)

Masato Tanaka (80)

Ebessan (70)

Norman Smiley (70)

Anthony Durante (65)

Brian Lawler (71)

Scott Hall (89)

Bill Goldberg (85)

TAKA Michinoku (84)

B.G. James (78)

Marcus Bagwell (78)

Disco Inferno (76)

Konnan (74)

Sonny Siaki (74)

Michael Modest (67)

Bryan Clark (64)

Rick Steiner (64)

Malice (63)

Brian Adams (62)

LOWER MIDCARDERS

Perry Saturn (60)

Akira Taue (52)

Richard Slinger (60)

OPENERS

none

JOBBERS

none

MANAGERS

New Jack (84)

Alicia Shamrock (65)

Vince Russo (83)

Cyrus The Virus (68)

NON-WRESTLERS

Mick Foley (87)

Percy Pringle (73)

Mike Sanders (69)

TAG TEAMS {members} (experience)

Road Warriors {Road Warrior Hawk & Road Warrior Animal} (100)

Kronik {Brian Adams & Bryan Clark} (82)

TITLES (image) {current holder}

NWA World (83) {Jeff Jarrett}

NWA X (79) {TAKA Michinoku}

NWA Tag Team (78) {Road Warriors}

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, May 7, 2003

Our contract with the Urban America Network came to an end last week, and we decided no to renew the contract despite not landing a major network TV deal. Another TV contract that ended last week was Ring of Honor’s High Impact TV. With its cancellation, the lowest-rated wrestling program now is Jersey All Pro Wrestling’s Weekly show Friday evenings on some local network.

I received another job offer yesterday, this time from Combat Zone Wrestling. They are at the Regional level, but are nearly $1.5 million in debt. While it would be an interesting challenge to turn the promotion around, I’m very happy where I am right now.

With the loss of XPlosion, I now have only three shows to build to May-hem. Hopefully, that network deal will work out by the end of this month.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event, with Sting facing Sonny Siaki!

Kavovit: The former X-division champion should pose Sting’s toughest challenge since he arrived in TNA, so we’ll see how he does.

Snake: Also, Bill Goldberg was outraged by his loss to Masato Tanaka last week, and tonight he’ll be taking on Tanaka’s pal, Ebessan.

Kavovit: I’m sure Goldberg will be looking for a little payback in that one. Also, in a few minutes Perry Saturn will be taking on Brian Lawler, and a little later Ken Shamrock will be facing Richard Slinger. Earlier today, our cameras caught this exchange between Ken Shamrock and his wife, Alicia.

The video screen comes to life with a shot of Alicia nervously pacing in the dressing room. The door opens, and in walks Ken Shamrock with a can of soda. He hands it to her and tells her it wasn’t that big of a deal. Alicia tells him that just thinking about going to the vending machines brings back bad memories for her. Ken promises that after he makes Richard Slinger tap out they’ll call her psychologist to help her get over this problem.

OR: 85

(Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 64 to 66.)

Perry Saturn vs. Brian Lawler: It’s always good to start the show off with a good X-division match. And it is a good match, with about as much fan interest as any opening match in recent weeks. Maybe getting rid of the less-over performers was a good thing, after all. In the end, Lawler hits a Missile Dropkick and covers Saturn. Saturn gets his foot on the ropes, but the referee doesn’t see it and counts to three. As Lawler gets up, he moves Saturn’s leg off the ropes, still without the ref noticing.

Winner: Brian Lawler

OR: 71

CR: 61

MQ: 81

After the match, Lawler walks to the announcers’ desk. This should be interesting. He calls out commissioner Mick Foley! The fans cheer when Foley walks through the curtain. Lawler boasts about his victory over Saturn and how he should get a title shot net week. Foley seems skeptical, pointing out the referee’s mistake while questioning whether Lawler deserves a title shot. Finally, he makes his decision – next week, right here in the TNA Asylum (thumbs up, cheap pop), it will be Brian Lawler vs. Jody Fleisch vs. Sonny Siaki vs. Ron Killings, with the winner getting a title shot at May-hem. Lawler pouts, and then walks off.

OR: 71

(Mick Foley dropped in over from 87 to 85.)

Backstage, New Jack stands with Ebessan. New Jack again iterates that he just doesn’t understand all the hype for the X division, but in Ebessan’s match tonight against Bill Goldberg, there won’t be none of that crap. It’ll be a brawl, and he thinks Ebessan will be able to hold his own. After all, last week Masato Tanaka proved that Goldberg can be beaten.

OR: 75

Ken Shamrock (with Alicia Shamrock) vs. Richard Slinger: A good match, but it’s pretty much a squash for Shamrock. Alicia is noticeably looking over her shoulder quite often, obviously still concerned about another abduction. Finally, Shamrock locks in the Ankle Lock, and Slinger taps out.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 76

CR: 71

MQ: 82

Sonny Siaki is in the SEX locker room, talking trash about Sting. He says Sting has never faced anyone like him, and that Sting’s too old to keep up with him. Siaki even says he can run circles around Sting. Maybe someone should tell Siaki that he’s in a wrestling match tonight, not a foot race.

OR: 82

Meanwhile, Sting is standing by outside his dressing room. He tells us that he’s not done with Sports Entertainment Xtreme, and tonight Siaki is the next one on his list.

OR: 88

Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Another good match, but this one’s pretty much all Goldberg. Sure, Ebessan has his moments, but they’re all short-lived. In the end, it’s the standard Spear/Jackhammer combo that gets the pin for Goldberg.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 78

CR: 74

MQ: 82

Goldberg celebrates his win in the ring with Percy Pringle as New Jack helps Ebessan back to the locker room. Surprisingly, Cyrus The Virus walks through the curtain with a briefcase! He hasn’t been seen in more than a month. Goldberg and Pringle warily watch him as he gets a microphone and enters the ring. Cyrus talks about all four wrestlers that Pringle manages, and the good qualities that they all have. He points out that despite their talent, only Kronik has received a title shot, and even then only one. He says he’s got connections with the networks, and he can market them beyond NWA: TNA. He offers to buy all four contracts from Pringle. Pringle laughs and shakes his head, until Cyrus opens the briefcase and explains that there’s $500,000 in it. It doesn’t take Pringle long to take the briefcase and shake Cyrus’ hand. Pringle leaves, and Goldberg looks confused by the turn of events. Cyrus leaves the ring and beckons for Goldberg to follow him. After a few moments, he does.

OR: 82

(Percy Pringle gained in over from 73 to 74. Cyrus The Virus gained in over from 68 to 70.)

Sting vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Another good match, making us 4-for-4 tonight. I’ll take that any night. Oh, and the fans are into this one as well, which is an added bonus. Russo helps Siaki get the advantage several times, only to have Sting eventually re-take control. Eventually Sting hits the Scorpion Death Drop, which causes Russo to jump up on the ring apron. Instead of covering, Sting punches Russo, knocking him to the floor. Siaki’s back up, but Sting floors him with a punch and then applies the Scorpion Death Lock for the submission. Suddenly, Disco Inferno and Konnan charge the ring, but Sting slides out.

Winner: Sting

OR: 84

CR: 86

MQ: 82

Russo gets a microphone before joining his troops in the ring, as Sting continues playing to the crowd. He tells Sting to get a partner for next week – anyone he wants – and face Disco and Konnan. Sting nods his head, so I guess it’s on next week.

OR: 77

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 6546

Best segment: Interview with Sting (88)

Worst segment: (tie) Brian Lawler over Perry Saturn; Brian Lawler confronts Mick Foley (71)

Best match: Sting over Sonny Siaki (84)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, May 14, 2003

After last week’s show, Ebessan told me that Bill Goldberg was working too stiff in their match. That’s the first complaint I’ve had about him. I make a note of it for future reference.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait to find out who Sting has chosen to be his partner tonight against Konnan and Disco Inferno!

Kavovit: Not only that, but last week commissioner Mick Foley made a Fatal Four-way match for tonight to determine the No. 1 contender for the X title.

Snake: It’ll be Ron Killings, Jody Fleisch, Brian Lawler, and Sonny Siaki. What if Siaki wins?

Kavovit: Then I guess he’ll have to face his SEX cohort, TAKA Michinoku, for the title at May-hem. But also, tonight, we have a Tag Team title match, and Bill Goldberg will be in action tonight with his new manager, Cyrus The Virus.

Snake: Last week, Cyrus purchased the contracts of Goldberg, as well as Kronik and Malice.

Kavovit: Kronik will be in action against the Hardcore Japanese, but right now let’s head to the ring for our first match.

Norman Smiley vs. Michael Modest: A decent opener, but it doesn’t live up to our expectations. It looks like it’s going to be one of those nights. Smiley gets Modest in the Norman Conquest, and Modest quickly submits.

Winner: Norman Smiley

OR: 63

CR: 65

MQ: 76

Backstage, Sonny Siaki is preparing for the Fatal Four-way match later tonight. Vince Russo approaches and tells him that he has just one mission tonight: make sure Jody Fleisch doesn’t win. Siaki looks confused, and Russo reassures him that it’s OK to win, because either way the belt will stay with Sports Entertainment Xtreme. Siaki smiles and continues his preparations.

OR: 84

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 74 to 76.)

Akira Taue & Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Kronik (with Cyrus The Virus): A good match that begins with Kronik spending a lot of time watching their new manager. I don’t think they’re quite sure why Cyrus is in their corner and not Percy Pringle. Eventually, they focus on the match at hand, which ends when Bryan Clark pins Taue after High Times. Ebessan enters the ring, and the brawl starts up again. Even New Jack gets a few shots in, but no crutches are broken, which means this wasn’t an official New Jack Match™. Eventually, the brawl goes backstage.

Winner: Kronik

OR: 63

CR: 60

MQ: 82

B.G. James and Scott Hall are backstage, making fun of the Road Warriors. Actually, it’s pretty funny. The gist of this parody is that the Road Warriors are old, and that Hall & James are going to beat them for the Tag Team titles tonight.

OR: 75

X-Division No. 1 contender’s Fatal Four-way match: Jody Fleisch vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo) vs. Brian Lawler vs. Ron Killings: Damn, that has to be one of the longest match titles in the history of wrestling. About four minutes in, Siaki nails Fleisch with the Siakalypse and scores the pinfall, eliminating Fleisch. I guess Siaki met Russo’s requirement for tonight. However, Siaki taunts Fleisch afterwards, which allows Lawler to sneak up behind him and roll him up for the pinfall. Lawler tells Killings to bring it, and he does. The match continues for another three minutes before Killings scores the pin with a Truth Or Consequences to earn the title shot at May-hem. A good match, and the fans were really into it as well.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 72

CR: 79

MQ: 84

Backstage, the cameras find Bill Goldberg sitting on a bench while Cyrus The Virus explains things to him. Goldberg will be taking on Anthony Durante tonight, but Cyrus knows that Goldberg won’t have any trouble with him. He tells Goldberg it’s time to quit fooling around and get down to the business at hand – winning the World title from Jeff Jarrett. Cyrus says he’s got a plan, which brings a smile to Goldberg. Weird segment, totally out of character for Goldberg. I mean, sitting and smiling at the same time? What’s up with that?

OR: 79

(Cyrus The Virus gained in over from 70 to 73.)

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. Scott Hall & B.G. James (with Vince Russo): Another good match, and the fans are down with it as well. Surprisingly, Hall is actually able to stand toe-to-toe with the Road Warriors, and often controls the match when he’s in the ring. However, James continues to struggle against them, despite his recent experiences against them. In the end, the Road Warriors are too much for James, and they connect with the Doomsday Device. Hawk keeps Hall at bay while Animal scores the pin.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 72

CR: 81

MQ: 82

Backstage, Disco Inferno and Konnan tell us it doesn’t matter who Sting picks as his partner, they don’t have the experience working together like Konnan and Disco do. Um, I don’t recall them being a tag team, but SEX swaps partners around so much I have a hard time keeping track.

OR: 77

Anthony Durante vs. Bill Goldberg (with Cyrus The Virus): There’s a certain vegetable that people would use to describe this match, it’s just not coming to me now. Okra? No, that’s not it. Zucchini? No, that’s not it either. Oh, now I remember – squash! Goldberg dominates Durante, scoring the pin in less than three minutes after a Jackhammer. Good match for what it was.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 69

CR: 74

MQ: 81

Backstage, the cameras are at the vending area. Predictably, Alicia Shamrock peeks around the corner, finding the area deserted. She tells herself she can do this, and walks to the soda machine. Before depositing her coins, she checks over her shoulder, again not finding anyone. However, if she’d been a moment later, she would have seen Mike Sanders. As she bends over to get the can of soda, Sanders’ eyes bulge and he lets loose a wolf whistle. Alicia is startled, and Sanders walks over to her. She’s obviously frightened. He asks why she’s so frightened, until he’s tapped on the shoulder. He turns around, and Curt Hennig is standing there. He tells Sanders to mind his own business as Alicia escapes down the hall.

OR: 88

(Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 66 to 68. Mike Sanders gained in over from 69 to 71.)

Konnan, Disco Inferno, and Vince Russo come to the ring. They continue to run down Sting, saying he couldn’t find a partner. Finally Sting’s music plays, and he walks through the curtain. Russo asks where his partner is, and Sting just waves to the back. The curtain opens, and it’s …

Sting & Jeff Jarrett vs. Disco Inferno & Konnan (with Vince Russo): Russo looks shocked that Sting chose the World champion as his partner. Kavovit and Snake remind us that Jarrett also has had issues with SEX, so it’s not that much of a stretch. The fans are really excited to see two of their favorites working together. However, the match barely lasts five minutes before Bill Goldberg comes to ringside. He trips up Jarrett, who stumbles right into a Last Dance from Disco. Konnan attacks Sting as the referee, who never saw Goldberg interfere, counts the pin.

Winner: Disco Inferno & Konnan

OR: 72

CR: 83

MQ: 76

(Sting dropped in over from 98 to 97. Jeff Jarrett dropped in over from 86 to 85. Konnan gained in over from 74 to 75. Disco Inferno gained in over from 76 to 77.)

OR: 73

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7029

Best segment: Interview with Sting (88)

Worst segment: Alicia Shamrock meets Mike Sanders, Curt Hennig makes the save (88)

Best match: (tie) Ron Killings wins the Fatal Four-way; Road Warriors over B.G. James & Scott Hall; Disco Inferno & Konnan over Sting & Jeff Jarrett (72)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, May 21, 2003

Last week’s show was just “one of those days.” As a result, all the match ratings were seriously affected, which helped produce a three-way tie for Best Match of the Night honors. One person who wasn’t pleased was Jeff Jarrett. The champion didn’t want to do the job for Disco & Konnan, even if they did need Goldberg’s help to do it. Since this is the last show before May-hem, I felt I had to put him in a match tonight to help restore his morale.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait to see Sting get his hands on Disco Inferno!

Kavovit: Last week, Disco Inferno, along with Konnan, defeated Sting and Jeff Jarrett in a tag match.

Snake: Sting has been fighting against SEX ever since he first arrived, and tonight is another chapter in that ongoing saga.

Kavovit: It wasn’t exactly a clean pinfall since Bill Goldberg interfered. Tonight, Jarrett takes on Goldberg’s former partner, Malice, and Goldberg will be taking on Perry Saturn.

Snake: Another match I’m looking forward to is Ron Killings versus Sonny Siaki.

Kavovit: Siaki has challenged Killings for the X-division No. 1 contender’s role, and earlier today Ron Killings had these words about that match.

The video screen comes to life, showing Ron Killings in his street clothes. Well, it’s not too different than his ring attire, but that’s another story. He reminds us that last month, he was the No. 1 contender less than a week before April Action, and now he finds himself in the same predicament. However, this time he plans on seeing it through all the way to May-hem against TAKA Michinoku. Time for The Truth: The only way Siaki gets the title shot is to pry it from his cold, dead hands.

OR: 86

Akira Taue & Masato Tanaka (with New Jack) vs. Rick Steiner & Marcus Bagwell: Vince Russo is conspicuous by his absence. Kavovit and Snake mention it, but then say it’s a good that he’s not here to interfere. Tanaka and Taue surprisingly dominate Steiner and Bagwell – maybe Russo does a better job than we all thought. Surprisingly, it’s a good match, and it ends when Tanaka hits a Roaring Elbow on Steiner for the pin. The victory is short-lived, as Kronik jumps them from behind. Both Tanaka and Taue fall victim to the High Times.

Winner: Akira Taue & Masato Tanaka

OR: 72

CR: 64

MQ: 80

Backstage, Cyrus The Virus sits patiently while Bill Goldberg paces. Kronik walks in, and Cyrus congratulates them on a job well done. Cyrus then looks to the camera, and challenges Jeff Jarrett to face Goldberg at May-hem! He tells Jarrett to watch Goldberg’s match against Perry Saturn later for a sample of what Goldberg has in store for him.

OR: 76

X-division No. 1 contender’s match: Ron Killings vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Hmm, Russo’s at ringside for this match. Snake says he wonders where he was earlier, and Kavovit says that Steiner and Bagwell must have the same questions. A good match, and as usual the fans really get into it. These two have fought so often, they know each other’s moves and their counters to those moves. After about 12 minutes, TAKA Michinoku comes out with the X title belt. He gets up on the apron as Siaki tries for an Irish Whip, but Killings reverses it, and sends Siaki into the belt. Fate can be so cruel and ironic. Killings rolls up Siaki for the easy pin. TAKA jumps into the ring to get a head start on Sunday, and Siaki joins in for a 2-on-1 beatdown until Curt Hennig hits the ring to even the odds. The announcers dive into the usual Hennig/Killings friendship story as the members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme take off.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 83

CR: 83

MQ: 84

Backstage, Sting tells us he’s got two things on his mind. First, he challenges Scott Hall to a match this Sunday. He tells us he’s beaten just about everyone there is to beat in SEX, except Hall, who scored a cheap victory over Sting last month. As for tonight, he says he’s hear Disco Inferno bragging about getting the pin in last week’s tag match, and tonight he’s going to prove that it was just a fluke. He tells Disco to pray to the Lord for mercy, because Sting won’t show him any.

OR: 94

Perry Saturn vs. Bill Goldberg (with Cyrus The Virus): Like last week, Goldberg finishes Saturn off in less than two minutes. After a Jackhammer and the pin, Goldberg tells Jarrett that he’s next.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 76

CR: 69

MQ: 83

The camera cuts backstage, where a live feed from the arena is playing on a monitor. Goldberg continues to taunt Jarrett, until Jarrett appears and turns the monitor off. He tells Goldberg that he accepts the challenge, and he’ll see him Sunday at May-hem. Then he tells Goldberg it’s his turn to watch what Jarrett does to Malice.

OR: 90

Sting vs. Disco Inferno: Once again, no Russo. What could be more important than his guy’s match with Sting? Without outside interference, Sting finishes Disco off in about five minutes with the Scorpion Death Drop.

Winner: Sting

OR: 82

CR: 85

MQ: 78

The camera cuts backstage to the vending area, where tonight we find … Mike Sanders. He asks Alicia Shamrock if she remembers their meeting there last week. He tells us that Alicia and Ken Shamrock stayed away tonight, and that Ken has challenged him to a match at May-hem. He tells us that he accepts, so he can show Alicia how a real man is supposed to act around a woman.

OR: 72

Non-title match: Jeff Jarrett vs. Malice (with Cyrus The Virus): Jarrett carries Malice to a decent match, even doing a surprising amount of selling for the bigger man. However, in about eight minutes Malice falls victim to the Stroke. After the pinfall, Bill Goldberg and Kronik come out of the back and surround the ring. Just as it looks like they’re going to make their move, New Jack and the Hardcore Japanese rush the ring, standing with Jarrett, preparing to take on all comers. They even brought their own weapons with them – a chair for Tanaka, a stop sign for Taue, a Singapore cane for Ebessan, and of course a crutch for New Jack. Jarrett, I guess, has to make do with the World title belt.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 75

CR: 71

MQ: 79

Just when it looks like Cyrus and his men are going to make their move, Mick Foley’s music hits, and the commissioner comes out, which delays the 5-on-5 fight. Foley tells us that he’s been negotiating with Vince Russo for most of the evening. Oh, so that’s where he’s been. He says that Russo lobbied for Konnan and Disco Inferno to get a Tag Team title match based on their win last week over Jarrett and Sting, and he’s made that match. Also, Russo says Scott Hall accepts Sting’s challenge, so that match is also on for Sunday. And, as a result of action earlier tonight, Russo and Sonny Siaki have challenged Curt Hennig, and he’s accepted, so we’ll also have that match at May-hem. Now, for those in the ring and surrounding it, since Jarrett wants to fight Goldberg for the title, then so be it. Also, this Sunday Kronik will get their shot at the team of Masato Tanaka & Ebessan. And that decision is final!

OR: 91

(Mick Foley gained in over from 85 to 89.)

OR: 81

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7007

Best segment: Interview with Sting (94)

Worst segment: (tie) Interview with Mike Sanders; Akira Taue & Masato Tanaka over Rick Steiner & Marcus Bagwell (72)

Best match: Ron Killings over Sonny Siaki (83)

[LoveMuscle]

Sunday, May 25, 2003

As incredible as it may sound, after their match last week, Masato Tanaka complained about how stiff Rick Steiner was working. Um, hello kettle, this is pot. You’re black. Actually, I guess I have to take that one back, because nobody has complained about Tanaka – yet.

Just before the pay-per-view begins, New Jack’s music hits and the fans cheer. He comes out with Masato Tanaka and Ebessan for what he calls a “toughness demonstration.” Ebessan hands New Jack a chair, and he nails Tanaka with it! He tells Tanaka to get something, so he looks under the ring and finds a Singapore cane. What was that doing under there? He hands it to New Jack, who then breaks it over Ebessan’s head! Ebessan falls, but quickly pops back up. New Jack tells the crowd that there’s nothing Kronik can do to them that’s worse than what he just did, and look – they’re still standing and ready for more.

OR: 83

TNA May-hem

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and this is May-hem! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show!

Kavovit: Last Wednesday on Total Nonstop Action, commissioner Mick Foley announced the card for tonight’s show, and man, is it a doozie!

Snake: There’s a reason why this show is called May-hem, just look in the ring. Moments ago, New Jack and the Hardcore Japanese came out for what New Jack called a “toughness demonstration.”

Kavovit: Look, Tanaka’s bleeding!

Snake: I don’t think that matters to him, and … here comes Kronik!

Masato Tanaka & Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Kronik (with Cyrus The Virus): Adams and Clark hit the ring and go right after the Hardcore Japanese. It’s a pier-6 brawl and the referee can’t seem to get it down to just one man from each side in the ring. Finally, Adams and Ebessan go over the top rope, so the referee calls for the bell to start the match. It’s a very good match, these guys really took it up a notch tonight. The crowd was … there. Finally, Tanaka hits a Roaring Elbow on Brian Adams, and Clark can’t make the save in time. However, the brawl does continue, and soon after Malice hits the ring to give his side the advantage. Suddenly, despite already being at ringside, New Jack’s music plays, and through the curtain steps Akira Taue with a trashcan full of plunder! Cyrus wisely withdraws his troops before the plunder can be used. I get the feeling this is far from over.

Winner: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan

OR: 78

CR: 69

MQ: 87

Ken Shamrock (with Alicia Shamrock) vs. Mike Sanders: It’s a shame that Sanders is a non-wrestler, I’d like to use him more often than just once a month. With that said, you can guess who’s getting the push here. Shamrock makes quick work of Sanders, cinching in the Ankle Lock in about five minutes. Sanders quickly taps out. A good match, for what it was.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 79

CR: 76

MQ: 82

Curt Hennig vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): As the combatants enter the ring, clips from last Wednesday’s show are shown to help set up the match. The fans start booing Siaki even before the match begins. They love to hate him. It’s a decent match, but the fans make a lot of noise, so I guess they don’t care that it’s not as good as the first two matches were. Siaki, who has pretty much stayed in the X-division ranks, proves to be surprisingly capable of a good technical match. When he does add in the high-flying moves, it proves to be too much for Hennig. Siaki finishes him off with the Money Clip.

Winner: Sonny Siaki

OR: 79

CR: 80

MQ: 78

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 76 to 78.)

NWA X title match: Ron Killings vs. TAKA Michinoku © (with Vince Russo): I should have made Russo buy a ticket, since he’s got his guys in consecutive matches in this part of the card. I’m sure that he’ll be at ringside for all of them, since he’s not trying to negotiate matches with commissioner Mick Foley tonight. It’s a very good match, with both sides showing off their impressive display of moves. I think Killings was so focused on just making it to this match, he’s not really prepared. That gives TAKA the advantage, and he’s able to get Killings in position for the Michinoku Driver to score the pin.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 83

CR: 84

MQ: 86

(The NWA X title has gained in image from 79 to 81.)

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. Disco Inferno & Konnan (with Vince Russo): Another good match with good crowd heat – maybe they just hate Russo? I can understand that. The Road Warriors control for most of the match, and in the end they get Konnan set up for the Doomsday Device. However, Russo jumps up on the apron and shakes the top rope, causing Hawk to lose his balance. While the referee tries to get Russo off the apron, Disco clips Animal, causing him to drop Konnan and roll around on the mat while holding his knee. Konnan recovers, and sees Animal in pain. He quickly applies the Tequila Sunrise on the injured knee, and Animal taps out! SEX scores the upset victory to become the tag champs.

Winner: Disco Inferno & Konnan

OR: 82

CR: 81

MQ: 84

Sting vs. Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): Combine the crowd’s hatred for all things Russo and their love for Sting, and you get some insane crowd heat. In this case, you also get a good match. Sting has learned how Russo operates since the first time these two men faced each over six weeks ago. Russo tries to pass a chair to Hall like in their last encounter, but his aim is off. As Hall tries to retrieve the chair, he leaves himself in perfect position for Sting to apply the Scorpion Death Drop, and the pinfall is academic. However, Hall recovers and grabs the chair. Sting turns around, and gets blasted. Hall celebrates his shallow victory.

Winner: Sting

OR: 88

CR: 92

MQ: 81

Backstage, Cyrus The Virus knocks on a door and says it’s time. The door opens, and Bill Goldberg starts walking to the ring.

OR: 87

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Bill Goldberg (with Cyrus The Virus): Unfortunately, the crowd can’t sustain their enthusiasm from the last match, but it’s still plenty loud. Good back-and-forth action, but the champion has finally met his match. Goldberg is just too strong for Jarrett. Spear! The crowd rises to their feet in anticipation of a new champion. Jackhammer! That’s all. Cyrus presents Goldberg with the belt, and the crowd boos as he proudly displays it over his head.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 82

CR: 84

MQ: 80

OR: 82

Buy rate: 1.55

Attendance: 16638

Best segment: Sting over Scott Hall (88)

Worst segment: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan over Kronik (78)

Best match: Sting over Scott Hall (88)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, May 28, 2003

As the show was wrapping up Sunday, we got a surprise visit from the State Fire Marshal’s office. They said there’s no way we should be cramming 16,000 people in the TNA Asylum, and from now on we cannot have more than 10,000 fans there. So I guess from now on we’ll have to take our pay-per-views on the road. That will probably drive production costs up, and it’s a shame for the TNA fans in Nashville. However, we are a Global company, and I suppose it would be nice to put on a show for TNA fans in other parts of the country.

The East Coast Wrestling Association was forced to cancel their show last Sunday, and the company appears to be on the verge of falling to Small level – the kiss of death for a company like ECWA. However, we’re not alone in being successful while the market falls. Federation De Lutte Internationale has risen to National level. The Rougeaus’ promotion has a few interesting talents that I’ve been pursuing for months.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show!

Kavovit: Tonight, the former World champion, Jeff Jarrett, starts down the road to regaining his title against B.G. James.

Snake: And we were scheduled for an interview with the new World champion, Bill Goldberg, but apparently he, Cyrus, and that whole bunch is still out celebrating the win.

Kavovit: We also have Curt Hennig taking on one half of the new Tag Team champions, Konnan, in our main event.

Snake: That should be a good match. Two more members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme, Marcus Bagwell and Rick Steiner, will be challenging the Road Warriors. Earlier today we had these words from Bagwell and Steiner, along with Vince Russo.

On the video screen, Russo brags about how that now SEX has the Road Warriors’ number after beating them last Sunday at May-hem. He talks about how Steiner and Bagwell are going to beat them, but then Steiner and Bagwell get into a disagreement over which one is going to make the pin. Russo points out that it doesn’t really matter, but that argument is lost on the two mental giants standing next to him.

OR: 82

Back in the arena, Michael Modest has already made his way to the ring for his match, and he picked up a microphone along the way. He says he’s upset that Mick Foley couldn’t find him a challenger for May-hem as well. Tonight he plans on taking out his frustration on Perry Saturn.

OR: 64

Perry Saturn vs. Michael Modest: You know, Saturn does put on some decent matches. It’s just too bad the fans don’t care about him, and he’s not charismatic enough to get much of a push without a manager. It’s pretty much all Modest, but Saturn does get in a few shots. In the end, Modest hits the Reality Check for the pin.

Winner: Michael Modest

OR: 71

CR: 59

MQ: 83

B.G. James was backstage talking trash about Jeff Jarrett. Basically, he’s making fun of him for losing to Goldberg. Hey, there’s no shame in that. James says he’ll beat Jarrett just like Goldberg did, only it won’t take him as long.

OR: 83

Meanwhile, Jeff Jarrett reminds us of the last time he faced B.G. James. That was at Total Elimination, when Jarrett beat James. Jarrett is planning on repeating that outcome.

OR: 85

Road Warriors vs. Rick Steiner & Marcus Bagwell (with Vince Russo): I think many are expecting a squash, and are quite surprised that it looks like it’s going to be – only for SEX instead or the Road Warriors. Bagwell hits the Blockbuster on Hawk, and then Steiner demands to be tagged in. They have a brief argument while Hawk tags out. Animal doesn’t fare much better, and Bagwell gets the advantage. Bagwell calls Steiner in and holds Animal so Rick can deliver a Steiner Line … but Animal ducks out of the way, and Steiner floors Bagwell. Animal clotheslines Steiner out of the ring and covers Bagwell for the three count. Russo throws a fit on the floor, while Bagwell shoves Steiner. It looks like they’re going to come to blows, but Russo gets in the ring and calms things down.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 79

CR: 77

MQ: 81

Backstage, Konnan stands with his Tag Team title belt. He talks about how hard he worked to earn the belt and what it means to him. One thing it means is that he’s the best, and Curt Hennig isn’t. That means Hennig isn’t perfect after all.

OR: 83

Meanwhile, Hennig is watching that interview on a monitor in a different part of the building. He says that if Konnan wants to see perfection, just wait until later tonight.

OR: 77

Jeff Jarrett vs. B.G. James: The announcers say the reason Russo isn’t at ringside is because he’s trying to get things settled between Bagwell and Steiner. I say let them settle it in the parking lot. Without Russo’s advice and assistance, this one’s pretty much all Jarrett, who scores the pin after a Stroke.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 78

CR: 79

MQ: 77

The camera cuts backstage to the vending area. Yep, you guessed it: Alicia Shamrock peeks around the corner. She walks to the vending machine and deposits her money, then checks over her shoulder again. She gets her soda, checks the hallway, and walks away peacefully.

OR: 82

(Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 68 to 71.)

Curt Hennig vs. Konnan: Still no sign of Russo, as Kavovit tells us that Vince isn’t letting camera crews into the SEX locker room tonight, but there’s a lot of yelling coming from inside. Konnan is obviously distracted from all the commotion in his dressing area, and that allows Hennig to control for most of the match before hitting a Hennig Plex for the pin.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 77

CR: 80

MQ: 72

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7546

Best segment: Interview with Jeff Jarrett (85)

Worst segment: Interview with Michael Modest (64)

Best match: Road Warriors over Rick Steiner & Marcus Bagwell (79)

[LoveMuscle]

Sunday, June 1, 2003

After the show was over Wednesday night, I called Percy Pringle into my office. I told him that we didn’t have anything for him in the near future, and thanked him for everything he did for the company. He said this wasn’t unexpected, and thanked me for the opportunity he’d been given.

At our house show Thursday, Scott Hall showed up very late. This time, I had no immediate plans for Hall, so I suspended him for the rest of the month. OK, so that was only a couple of days, hopefully it’s enough for him to get the message.

Today, Combat Zone Wrestling issued a bankruptcy warning, similar to what Major League Wrestling did last month. As the business continues its worst slump in years, more and more of the smaller companies are going out of business. Ultimate Pro Wrestling, World Wrestling Council, Revolution Pro Wrestling, and Major League Wrestling all have declared bankruptcy, and once again the free agent market is flush with talent. However, we had already pretty much picked the market clean already. We added one prospect to the training camp and made one addition to the active roster.

Also today, Richard Slinger’s contract expired, and we have chosen not to renew it. One of the trainers has retired, so we hired another one to take his place. And we added a new paramedic – Dick Smasher. Ouch! He’s got a great name, and he’s a fine medic as well.

I took a trip to Training New Athletes, and the kids are making significant progress under Dory Funk. Some could graduate right now, but our training philosophy is to help them be all they can be. Kind of like the Army, I guess.

I gained a new appreciation for Steven Kavovit. He flies in from Japan every Wednesday and one Sunday a month to serve as our primary announcer. He’s also going a great job in NWA Japan helping our workers there develop their charisma. However, there are two workers there that refuse to take advantage of the opportunity they have. Kavovit feels that they won’t gain anything by staying there, so he recommends they be added to the active roster. I’m a little concerned about one of them because he’s neither over nor charismatic. He’s a great high-flyer and will be a fine addition to the X division, but first we have to make the fans care.

Late in the day today, I received a phone call from Rob Black, the owner of Xtreme Pro Wrestling. His promotion has risen in image every month, but he’s really worried about the slumping industry, and he felt like it was time to get out if he could get a fair price for his company. Since having to take out a small loan two months ago when we bought out World Wrestling All-Stars and Pro Wrestling Iron, our financial picture has improved greatly. When their asking price turned out to be less than $2 million, I agreed to the deal.

The addition of XPW brings a certain hardcore element into our company. While we have had Hardcore matches before, this is something quite unlike anything TNA has ever seen. To help the new wrestlers fit in, we have decided to increase our risk level. After consulting with our sponsors and the TV networks, we have raised our risk level from 45% to 65%.

Even after the purchase, we’re still in good shape financially. Since we still don’t have a television contract on a major network, perhaps we’ll get some positive publicity by donating some money to charity. After donating $864,000, we are left with just over $14 million.

Including the XPW additions (but leaving the free agents & promoted development guys as a surprise), here’s what our active roster looks like today (faces in blue, heels in red, tweeners in black, all followed by their current over):

MAIN EVENT

Sting (97)

UPPER MIDCARD

Ron Killings (89)

Jeff Jarrett (85)

Curt Hennig (84)

Road Warrior Hawk (81)

Road Warrior Animal (78)

MIDCARDERS

Jody Fleisch (86)

Ken Shamrock (85)

Masato Tanaka (80)

Psychosis (75)

Ebessan (70)

Norman Smiley (70)

Anthony Durante (65)

Damien 666 (63)

Chris Chetti (62)

Brian Lawler (71)

Scott Hall (89)

Bill Goldberg (85)

TAKA Michinoku (84)

B.G. James (78)

Marcus Bagwell (78)

Sonny Siaki (78)

Disco Inferno (77)

Konnan (75)

Shane Douglas (71)

Michael Modest (67)

Gangrel (65)

Jamal (65)

Bryan Clark (64)

Rick Steiner (64)

Malice (63)

Steven Richards (63)

Brian Adams (62)

LOWER MIDCARDERS

Perry Saturn (60)

Akira Taue (52)

Joey Matthews (60)

OPENERS

none

JOBBERS

none

MANAGERS

New Jack (84)

Alicia Shamrock (71)

Vince Russo (83)

Cyrus (73)

NON-WRESTLERS

Mick Foley (89)

Mike Sanders (71)

TAG TEAMS {members} (experience)

Road Warriors {Road Warrior Hawk & Road Warrior Animal} (100)

Kronik {Brian Adams & Bryan Clark} (84)

TITLES (image) {current holder}

NWA World (83) {Bill Goldberg}

NWA X (81) {TAKA Michinoku}

NWA Tag Team (78) {Disco Inferno & Konnan}

NWA Hardcore (50) {vacant} (formerly XPW World)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, June 4, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show!

Kavovit: Rumors have been flying all week, and here comes commissioner Foley. Hello, Mick.

Foley: Hello, Steven.

Kavovit: Commissioner, rumors say that you have a major announcement to make.

Foley: Well, that’s right, so I’ll cut right to the chase. Two months ago I bought out two wrestling promotions – World Wrestling All-Stars and Pro Wrestling Iron. Well, last weekend, I bought out another company! So, starting tonight, in addition to all the stars of TNA, you’ll also be seeing the stars of Xtreme Pro Wrestling!

Snake: Oh my! That’s another major acquisition for TNA!

Foley: You’ve got that right, Bart. In fact, later tonight you’ll be seeing some of the stars of XPW in action! I’ve booked Joey Matthews against Jody Fleisch in a X-division match, and Gangrel will be taking on Curt Hennig. Also …

Suddenly, some new music hits the arena, and Shane Douglas steps through the curtain! He’s got a title belt on his shoulder.

Foley: Also, I guess we’ll have an appearance from Shane Douglas.

Kavovit: Welcome to Total Nonstop Action, Shane.

Douglas: Shut up! I’ve only got one thing to say to you, Foley. You see this belt right here? This is the XPW Heavyweight title. This is mine. I won it and I have defended it with my own sweat and blood. And now you come in, buy out my company, and make all the XPW titles meaningless! This belt has no value whatsoever. And when that happens, there’s only one thing to do.

With that, Douglas throws the belt on the ground, picks up a steel chair, and starts beating the belt with it! Foley and the announcers take a step back so they don’t get hit by an errant swing or a piece of metal flying off the belt. Finally, Douglas throws the chair down.

Douglas: Now that’s what you do with a worthless piece of crap!

Foley: Hold on, Shane. I had big plans for you and all of XPW. I was even considering giving you a shot at Bill Goldberg to unify the titles. But now look what you’ve done.

Foley bends down to pick up the belt, but Douglas grabs him and applies a DDT right on the concrete! Foley lies motionless on the floor as Kavovit and Snake call for the medics.

Douglas: Like I said, that’s what you do to a worthless piece of crap!

OR: 85

(Shane Douglas gained in over from 71 to 72.)

While the medics help Foley to the back, they show a video on the screen. Cyrus, Goldberg, Malice, and Kronik are seen celebrating Goldberg’s win at May-hem.

OR: 100

(Cyrus gained in over from 73 to 76.)

Norman Smiley makes his way to the ring as the announcers wonder what he’s doing out here, since he’s not scheduled for a match. Smiley talks about the new XPW guys, saying that none of them are as good a technical wrestler as he is. He then challenges any wrestler in the back that’s new to TNA to compete against him right now. Boy, is he going to be surprised.

OR: 75

Norman Smiley vs. Johnny Smith: Smiley is surprised to see his fellow countryman. The announcers tell us that Smith has recently returned from Japan, and this is his first match in the United States in a long time. A good match, but the fans are not familiar with Smith, so they’re fairly quiet while Smith controls the match. Those who do know him aren’t surprised that he out-wrestles Smiley. Smith hits a Tiger Driver ’91, which draws oohs and ahhs from the fans. Smith puts Smiley in a Leglock Submission, and Smiley squeals like a little girl as he taps out.

Winner: Johnny Smith

OR: 64

CR: 63

MQ: 81

Curt Hennig is backstage, talking about his match with Gangrel. He talks about what a freak Gangrel is, like he’s some kind of vampire. Hennig says the only blood there’s going to be tonight won’t be his.

OR: 76

Jody Fleisch vs. Joey Matthews: Again, Matthews is the new guy, so most of the fans don’t recognize him. But he has a very good match with Fleisch, and the fans can appreciate that. Imagine that – a good match from the X division. In the end, Fleisch hits a Phoenix 720 DDT for the pin.

Winner: Jody Fleisch

OR: 69

CR: 69

MQ: 86

In the commissioner’s office, Foley sits on the couch with an ice pack on his head. Sting walks in and asks how he’s doing. Foley just looks at him, and Sting says never mind. Foley asks what’s on his mind, and Sting says he’s gotten his hands on every member of Sports Entertainment Xtreme except for one – Vince Russo. Foley chuckles and says Russo’s not a wrestler. Sting says he’ll do anything to get his hands on him, so Foley rules that Sting will wrestle in a match tonight, but Russo gets to pick who Sting’s opponent is and what kind of match it’s going to be. If Sting wins, then he’ll get a match with Russo tonight.

OR: 84

Curt Hennig vs. Gangrel: Gangrel has a very impressive and elaborate entrance. Unfortunately for him, his entrance lasts longer than this match. Hennig hits the Hennig Plex in less than two minutes to score the win.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 65

CR: 74

MQ: 73

During that match, Gangrel’s cup got knocked over, so the ring crew has to clean up the … uh … red, viscous fluid that was in the cup. Meanwhile, on the video screen a fairly small wrestler is seen hitting a series of very impressive moves in front of a small crowd (obviously not one of TNA’s). As the high spots and bumps get even wilder, the volume of the music rises before suddenly stopping and the video goes black before the words “coming soon” appear. The crowd response was, um, not much.

OR: 43

Vince Russo hits the ring to announce Sting’s first match that he must win to get to face Russo. Admittedly, it’s short notice, but the best he could come up with was …

Battle Royal: Sting vs. Sports Entertainment Xtreme: The announcers talk about how unfair this is as a laughing Russo joins them on commentary. The eight members of SEX all gang up on Sting, obviously intent on eliminating him first. They take turns hitting their finishing move on him until Marcus Bagwell acts like he’s ready to toss Sting over the top rope. However, he’s stopped by Rick Steiner. Bagwell and Steiner get into a shouting match, and eventually start shoving one another. The other members of SEX try to break it up before things get physical, but it’s too late. As Steiner and Bagwell struggle to break free to get at each other, Konnan, Disco Inferno, and B.G. James are knocked over the top rope to the floor. Finally, Scott Hall, Sonny Siaki, and TAKA Michinoku look at each other and shrug, deciding to let them go at it. After a couple of minutes, Hall figures they’ve had enough time and clotheslines both Bagwell and Steiner to the floor. All this time, Sting has been recovering. TAKA is the first to begin working over Sting, but he just grabs TAKA and flings him over the top rope. Russo’s really getting nervous as it’s down to just Hall and Siaki for his side. A two-on-one beatdown ensues, until Hall tries to hold Sting for Siaki, but Sting ducks and Hall is knocked to the floor. Siaki looks stunned, and Sting easily tosses him to win.

Winner: Sting

OR: 66

CR: 76

MQ: 72

Russo throws a fit as the referees get all the members of SEX sent back to the locker room. Sting finally motions to Russo, who reluctantly finally gets in the ring. Sting turns his back, and Russo gets in the first dozen shots or more. Then Sting turns around to face him, and he’s laughing! Sting whips Russo to the turnbuckle and nails him with a Stinger Splash. He whips him to the other corner, but as he charges for another Stinger Splash, out of nowhere Bill Goldberg hits the ring and Spears Sting! The referee calls for the bell as Goldberg hits a Jackhammer on Sting. Russo crawls over to the prone Sting and covers him. The referee is getting Goldberg to the back, so Russo counts his own pinfall and begins celebrating as the fans throw their empty popcorn boxes and soda cups at him.

Winner: no contest due to interference

OR: 70

CR: 88

MQ: 56

OR: 72

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7539

Best segment: Video with Cyrus, Bill Goldberg, etc. (100)

Worst segment: Video for debuting wrestler (43)

Best match: Sting & Vince Russo goes to a “no contest” (70)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, June 11, 2003

What a weird night last week was! It was “one of those nights,” where the true rating of the wrestling matches is thrown off. As a result, the best match of the night was a one-on-one match where one of the participants was Vince Russo. Now how messed up is that?

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

In an unusual twist, the show begins with another “coming soon” video featuring an unidentified lightweight performing several moves off the top rope. He looks like he’ll be a fine addition to the X division – whenever he finally gets here.

OR: 57

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event, when Bill Goldberg returns to Total Nonstop Action to defend the World title against Road Warrior Animal!

Kavovit: That should be a hard-hitting match. Also, Jeff Jarrett will be in action as will Sonny Siaki. They’ll be taking on some of the former XPW wrestlers in singles action.

Snake: But right now, commissioner Mick Foley is making his way out here. Mick, it’s good to see you’re OK after what happened last week.

Foley: Well, thank you, Bart. Last week you saw what Shane Douglas did to me and the XPW Heavyweight title belt. But I want to show you what I’ve done.

Foley opens the box he’s carrying and pulls out the remains of the XPW Heavyweight title.

Foley: It’s taken a lot of tape, glue, and staples to put this thing back together as best I could. Now as you can see, there are still a few pieces missing, but you can still tell it’s a title belt. But you know what, I think it’s a better symbol for XPW now than it was before.

Kavovit: What do you mean by that?

Foley: Well, look at this belt. Doesn’t that just say “hardcore” to you? XPW was all about hardcore, and there’s nobody in this business that knows more about Hardcore matches than me. Before, it was too pretty to be representing something hardcore.

Snake: So what are you going to do with it?

Foley: If you’ll look closely, I’ve taped over the Xtreme Pro Wrestling name, because that company no longer exists. Now why would I go to all the trouble of repairing a title belt for a defunct promotion? Well, look over here. Read what that says, Steven.

Kavovit: It says “NWA Hardcore.”

Foley: That’s right, this belt is now the NWA Hardcore title. Now, next week we’re going to determine who will be the first Hardcore champion in a come-as-you-are Hardcore match, which is open to every wrestler in this company who wants to compete. Just stop by my office before the show begins next week and sign up. Oh, and Shane Douglas, you don’t have to worry – I’ve already signed you up. Have a nice day!

OR: 92

(Mick Foley gained in over from 89 to 91.)

Backstage, Sonny Siaki is standing with Vince Russo. He talks trash about this Chris Chetti guy he’s facing tonight in a X-division match. Siaki reminds us that he is a former X champion, and that the best high-flyers were already here in TNA before the XPW guys came. The whole time Siaki’s talking, Russo is standing in the background, appearing to be deep in thought.

OR: 88

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 78 to 80.)

Psychosis vs. Joey Matthews: Some of the crowd remembers Psychosis from WCW. Most remembers Joey Matthews losing to Jody Fleisch last week. It doesn’t take much thought to understand why the fans weren’t really into this one. However, it was a good match, typical of the X division. Psychosis and Matthews have worked together in XPW, so that helps the match flow. In the end, Psychosis hits a Sky Twister Press for the pin.

Winner: Psychosis

OR: 73

CR: 62

MQ: 84

Backstage, Steven Richards says he’s ready to make an impact in TNA. He planned on starting at the top, with the World champion, but instead he has to settle with the former World champion, Jeff Jarrett.

OR: 78

(Steven Richards gained in over from 63 to 64.)

Meanwhile, Jeff Jarrett is standing outside his dressing room. He tells us that Richards couldn’t cut it in the WWE, he just barely made it in XPW, and tonight his trip to the flea market wrestling companies will really begin to accelerate.

OR: 84

Chris Chetti vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Russo is physically at ringside, but his mind seems to be someplace else. Unlike the fans, he’s not really into this match. Several times he has his back turned to the ring, not even paying attention. He’s missing a pretty good match, but Siaki doesn’t need Russo’s help. Siaki controls for most of the match, hitting the Money Clip to score the pin. After a brief celebration, Siaki taps Russo on the shoulder and lets him know the match is over.

Winner: Sonny Siaki

OR: 76

CR: 71

MQ: 82

Backstage, Bill Goldberg is pacing around with the World title around his waist. Cyrus proclaims that the time for celebrating is over, and it’s time to prove just how dominate a champion Goldberg really is. Tonight he takes on half of the most dominant tag team in the history of wrestling – Animal of the Road Warriors. Tonight, Goldberg is a superstar, and he’s beginning his quest for immortality.

OR: 83

Jeff Jarrett vs. Steven Richards: This one was squasharific. Jarrett took control early in this short match before hitting the Superplex on Richards for the pin.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 74

CR: 73

MQ: 76

As the announcers hype the main event, Vince Russo’s music hits, and he walks to the ring, followed by all the members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme. Russo introduces a video clip from last week’s Battle Royal, and tells his troops how upset he is that they let Sting get to him. He tells us there’s no “I” in SEX, but it’s become painfully obvious that somebody is putting their own personal agenda ahead of what’s best for the group. Russo gets in Marcus Bagwell’s face as the crowd begins to stir. Russo announces that tonight SEX removes a weak link, and then he tells the guys to attack. Suddenly, they all jump Rick Steiner, as Russo obviously told the others beforehand who he was kicking out of the group. A brutal 7-on-1 beatdown ensues, and Russo gets some shots in as well. Eventually, they leave Steiner in the ring as the medics rush in to check on him.

OR: 76

(Rick Steiner gained in over from 64 to 66.)

NWA World title match: Road Warrior Animal vs. Bill Goldberg © (with Cyrus): An impressive power match, as Animal can go toe-to-toe with Goldberg. However, some timely interference by Cyrus gives Goldberg the opening he needs to take control. Goldberg runs through all his moves, including the Spear and the Jackhammer before making the pin. Goldberg cuts the celebration short and resumes putting the boots to Animal, which quickly brings out Hawk to help his partner. Goldberg gets out of the ring before Hawk can catch him.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 81

CR: 80

MQ: 83

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7505

Best segment: Interview with Mick Foley (92)

Worst segment: Video for debuting wrestler (57)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Road Warrior Animal (81)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, June 18, 2003

Perhaps I spoke too soon about FLI – this past week they dropped back down to Cult level. They cut some workers and staff, but unfortunately not anyone I was interested in.

After last week’s show, Road Warrior Animal complained about how stiff Bill Goldberg was working in their match. That’s the second complaint I’ve had from him, so tonight I’m going to put him against another worker that has multiple complaints about working too stiff.

There are some personnel moves I should bring you up to speed on. As expected, we have released Rick Steiner. The management felt that he wasn’t contributing a lot to the company, especially for the kind of money he’s making. Also, they see a lot of potential in Joey Matthews, so it was decided that he would be sent to Japan to work on his charisma. One final cut was Mike Sanders. As a non-wrestler, it was becoming difficult to arrange feuds around him, since he can’t wrestle every week to help set up the feuds. With the addition of the XPW guys, there wasn’t really a spot on the active roster for him. He’s a good talker, so you never know – he may be brought back someday as the commissioner, after Mick Foley retires.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event, because Bill Goldberg has challenged Road Warrior Hawk to a World title match!

Kavovit: Goldberg beat Hawk’s tag team partner, Animal, last week, and he wasn’t happy when Hawk prevented him from continuing the assault on Animal.

Snake: Also tonight, commissioner Mick Foley announced that there’s going to be a match to determine the first-ever NWA Hardcore champion.

Kavovit: The only thing we know is that it’ll be Hardcore rules and Shane Douglas is in it. Hopefully commissioner Foley will come out to give us more details before that match occurs. Plus we have a pair of X division matches, including one for the X title.

Snake: Yeah, TAKA Michinoku will be defending his belt against a newcomer from XPW, Damien 666. Also, Ron Killings will be taking on Brian Lawler.

Kavovit: And Curt Hennig will be facing Johnny Smith. Earlier, we got these words from Hennig about that match.

On the video screen, Hennig says that he saw Johnny Smith’s match a couple of weeks ago, and while he was very impressive, he wasn’t perfect. Hennig tells us that he’s discovered some weaknesses, and he’s going to exploit them tonight.

OR: 77

As Hennig’s interview is wrapping up, yet another video for the mysterious X-division worker replaces it on the video screen. We get a good look at his face this time, but still nobody recognizes him. The video ends with him yelling something, but it sounds like it’s in Spanish. On the screen appears the words, “Coming soon … the X division will never be the same!”

OR: 47

Mick Foley’s music hits, and he joins the announcers at their desk with the Hardcore title belt. He says there was more interest in this belt than he imagined, so he had to limit it to the first 20 guys who signed up. The rules are … there are no rules! You are eliminated when you’re pinned or you submit, and pinfalls count anywhere in the building. As Foley talks several referees (and road agents with referee shirts) come and surround the ring. Foley says he’s had to hire several extra referees to chase the action all over the building, and in fact he himself will also be serving as a referee. He then hands the ring announcer the list of participants, and assumes his place with the other referees.

OR: 84

NWA Hardcore title match: 20-man Battle Royal: The participants are introduces, some individually, and some as a group. First is Shane Douglas, then Michael Modest. All three members of the Hardcore Japanese and their manager, New Jack, are in the match. After Perry Saturn is introduced, Vince Russo comes out with Scott Hall, Disco Inferno, B.G. James, Konnan, and Marcus Bagwell. Anthony Durante is introduced, and then Cyrus comes out with his guys, Malice, Brian Adams, Bryan Clark, and his newest recruit from XPW, Jamal. Steven Richards is introduced, and then Alicia and Ken Shamrock come out. The final entrant, making his TNA debut to a large pop from the crowd, is Steve Corino.

As Corino is announced, the action begins when New Jack breaks a crutch over Steven Richards’ head, making it an official New Jack Match™ and the ring announcer has to scramble out of the ring to avoid all the carnage. The action quickly spills out onto the floor and backstage, where camera crews are standing by to show all the action on the video screen. Surprisingly enough, the first pinfall is scored by Ken Shamrock on Scott Hall (elimination #1) when Shamrock hits a Belly-To-Belly Suplex on the floor. Meanwhile, there’s only four men in the ring. Does that tell you where the rest of the guys are? Those four are Ebessan, Masato Tanaka, Disco Inferno, and Konnan. New Jack is at ringside forking Steven Richards. No, really, he’s got a fork and keeps grinding it into Richards’ head until Richards yells that he quits (elimination #2). New Jack passes a couple of chairs to Tanaka and Ebessan, who deliver chairshots in stereo to the tag team champions, and quickly score pinfalls on both Konnan (elimination #3) and Disco Inferno (elimination #4). On the video screen, we see that B.G. James is faring much better than his Sports Entertainment Xtreme teammates, as he breaks a 2x4 over Perry Saturn and makes a quick pinfall (elimination #5). Meanwhile, Steve Corino and Michael Modest brawl past, and the camera follows them all the way into a men’s restroom! The cameraman follows the inside, where Corino hits a Piledriver into a toilet! No word on whether the seat was up or down. Corino pins Modest (elimination #6), and B.G. James promptly attacks with the metal trashcan. Discarded paper towels go flying when James whacks Corino with the trashcan, busting him open. Corino bleeding? Never seen that before. Back in the ring, there seems to be a stalemate. On one side is Ebessan, New Jack, Akira Taue, and Masato Tanaka. Of the other is Jamal, Brian Adams, Bryan Clark, and Malice. Even though Jamal is new, there are a lot of bad feelings between the two sides, and it isn’t long before the stalemate is over and a big brawl begins. Jamal hits a Samoan Drop on Taue to eliminate him (elimination #7), while on the video screen we see Ken Shamrock with the Ankle Lock on Marcus Bagwell, and he taps out (elimination #8). Kronik hits a High Times on New Jack and Clark picks up a pin (elimination #9), while Ebessan pins Malice after a Tanaka chairshot (elimination #10). Jamal attacks Tanaka, but Ebessan nails him with a Singapore Cane about a dozen times, and Tanaka hits a Roaring Elbow on Jamal and pins him (elimination #11). Kronik jumps Ebessan and Tanaka, and they continue to fight as we see on the video screen B.G. James ramming Corino’s head into the vending machine, knocking him to the floor where James covers and finally pins Corino (elimination #12). Ken Shamrock appears out of nowhere and attacks James as the announcers applaud Corino for his effort. In the ring, Kronik delivers High Times on Ebessan, and Adams picks up the pin (elimination #13). Meanwhile, we see James and Shamrock fight down a hall and into the SEX locker room. The camera follows a referee inside, where Sonny Siaki and TAKA Michinoku have joined James in a 3-on-1 assault! The referee tries his best to keep Siaki and TAKA away, but isn’t successful. Eventually, all three jump on top of Shamrock, and he can’t kick out from under all three (elimination #14). In the ring, Tanaka has a chair and is nailing both Adams and Clark repeatedly in the head with it. Eventually, they both fall down, and Tanaka pins both of them at the same time (eliminations #15 and #16). On the video screen, James staggers out of the SEX locker room, where Anthony Durante is waiting! He begins the assault, but Siaki comes out of the locker room and hits him with the Siakalypse. James falls on him to secure the pin (elimination #17). Tanaka looks around the ringside area, and not finding anyone, spots James on the video screen and heads backstage. He catches up with James, and drags him back to the ring. He rolls him in, picks up the handicapped parking sign, and puts a dent in it via James’ head. Tanaka scores the clean pinfall (elimination #18), and starts celebrating his victory. However, one of the referees gets in the ring and pulls his hand down, telling him there’s one more. Behind Tanaka’s back, Shane Douglas rolls out from where he’s been hiding under the ring, picks up a chair, and sneaks into the ring. The referee points, and Tanaka turns around – chairshot to the head, but Tanaka no-sells it! Douglas hits him again, but no effect! Douglas hits him a third time, and finally Tanaka is down. Douglas picks him up, and hits a Franchiser. Douglas covers, and the referee begins to count. Douglas gets up, grabs a Singapore Cane, and nails the referee! He points to Foley and says he wants him to count. Foley gets in the ring, and Douglas covers Tanaka. Foley intentionally counts slow, but to no avail, as Tanaka is out cold (elimination #19). Douglas insists that Foley raise his arm and present him with the title belt, which he grudgingly does.

Winner: Shane Douglas

OR: 67

CR: 68

MQ: 66

(The NWA Hardcore title gained in image from 50 to 54.)

In the SEX locker room, we see several members of the group trying to straighten things up after the Hardcore Battle Royal spilled in there. Russo spies the camera and grabs TAKA. Russo says that TAKA has beaten everyone in the X division, so he’s glad they brought in some new competition for him. Russo says it doesn’t really matter, since TAKA is going to beat them all too, starting with Damien 666 tonight.

OR: 75

The twisted metal and shattered wood has all been cleared out of the ring, and most of the ringside area as the next match begins.

Curt Hennig vs. Johnny Smith: Quite a contrast from the Hardcore bloodbath earlier, this one is a lot more of a mat-based, technical wrestling match. After several minutes of back-and-forth action, Hennig takes advantage of an opening and controls the match from then on, eventually hitting the Hennig Plex for the pin.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 75

CR: 71

MQ: 79

Backstage, Ron Killings congratulates his friend, Curt Hennig, on winning his match. Killings says he’s going to dominate Brian Lawler just like Hennig dominated Johnny Smith.

OR: 89

NWA X title match: Damien 666 vs. TAKA Michinoku © (with Vince Russo): This is Damien’s first televised match in TNA, so the fans aren’t into this match at the beginning. However, as the action heats up, they start to come around. A good match – well, an average match by X-division standards. Still, that’s good enough to get the fans’ attention. Damien scores several near-falls, as Russo goes nuts at ringside. Finally, Russo trips up Damien behind the referee’s back, and Michinoku moves in for the kill. He hits a Michinoku Driver to pick up the win.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 76

CR: 66

MQ: 86

Cyrus smiles at the camera inside his dressing room as Bill Goldberg paces behind him. He tells the crowd that Hawk shouldn’t have interfered in Goldberg’s business last week, because now it’s time to pay. Goldberg stops pacing, pushes Cyrus aside and looks into the camera.

Goldberg: Hawk! You’re next!

OR: 87

(Cyrus gained in over from 76 to 78.)

Ron Killings vs. Brian Lawler: A surprisingly poor match from these two X-division regulars. I guess things just aren’t clicking with them today. They try hard, and the fans cheer their efforts, but this was a total disappointment. Killings finally ends it with a Truth Or Consequences.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 78

CR: 78

MQ: 79

NWA World title match: Road Warrior Hawk vs. Bill Goldberg © (with Cyrus): It’s almost like watching a replay of last week. Hawk hits the ring and actually has the advantage for the first couple of minutes, but some well-timed assistance from Cyrus (behind the ref’s back, of course) helps the champ get control. Goldberg goes through all his moves before hitting the Spear and Jackhammer for the pin. Animal comes out from the back as the pinfall is counted, so Goldberg doesn’t even try to continue the assault after the match.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 82

CR: 82

MQ: 83

OR: 76

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 8046

Best segment: Interview with Ron Killings (89)

Worst segment: Video for debuting wrestler (47)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Road Warrior Hawk (82)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, June 25, 2003

At our house show Thursday, Konnan got into a fight backstage. Unfortunately, I can’t suspend him, because I need him to defend the Tag Team titles this Sunday at SEX On The Beach. Then, and our house show yesterday, Ron Killings suffered a broken arm, which will keep him out of action until late in the year. I guess my plans for him and the X title go out the window for now.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show, because commissioner Mick Foley will be announcing the matches for this Sunday’s pay-per-view!

Kavovit: We’ll be at the Sun Dome in Tampa, Florida this Sunday, and Commissioner Foley has promised up that all the NWA titles will be on the line. But tonight, we’ve got Jeff Jarrett in action against Gangrel, and Cyrus’ latest addition, Jamal, will be making his singles debut in TNA tonight against on of the Hardcore Japanese, Akira Taue.

Snake: That one will be a Hardcore match, and if that’s anything like last week’s Hardcore Battle Royal, it will certainly be a wild affair. Speaking of last week’s Hardcore Battle Royal, judging by the sound of that music, we’re about to be graced by the presence of the winner of that match, Shane Douglas. Hello, Shane, congratulations on winning the Hardcore title last week.

Douglas: Shut up! I didn’t come out here to talk to you stinking announcers. Last week I defeated most of the top wrestlers in this lousy company to prove that I am the Franchise. And now, Mick Foley wants me to defend that title this Sunday at SEX On The Beach. SEX On The Beach? Who thought up that crappy title?

Kavovit: I think that was scheduled when Vince Russo was commissioner.

Douglas: Huh, it figures. Anyways, as I was saying, I’ve already beaten all of the top contenders for the Hardcore title last week. So I suppose Foley’s going to have to find a challenger for me. Well, I’ve got an idea. I know there’s one person in this company that really would love to get their hands on Shane Douglas in a Hardcore match. And you know what, I’d really like to get my hands on him, too. So right now, I want to issue a challenge for this Sunday.

Snake: Oh, my! Who can it be?

Douglas: I’ve been wanting to Franchise your ass since the day I first stepped into this company, Mick Foley! You call yourself the hardcore legend? I seem to remember running your ass out of ECW, and you never had the balls to come to XPW because you know you would have got your ass kicked the moment you first walked into the building. So, Foley, unless you’ve lost all your “testicular fortitude,” come get you some of this in Tampa!

OR: 80

(Shane Douglas gained in over from 72 to 73.)

Backstage, at the vending machine, Alicia Shamrock appears to have gotten over her fears. She boldly walks right around the corner without looking first, and never looks over her shoulder as he puts her coins in the machine. Too bad, or else she would have noticed Scott Hall walking up behind her.

Hall: Hey, yo!

Alicia is startled as she turns around, and the look of fear is back in her eyes.

Hall: Last week, your husband made me look bad by eliminating me first from the Hardcore Battle Royal. So tell him that the Bad Guy wants a piece of his ass this Sunday at SEX On The Beach. Then again, you’re looking pretty hot tonight, maybe I’ll just get a piece of your ass and call it even.

Hall runs his fingers through her hair, and she pulls away from him and runs down the hall. Hall chuckles and picks up the soft drink she purchased, then starts drinking it before spewing it out of his mouth.

Hall: Ugh! This shit’s diet!

OR: 84

(Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 71 to 72.)

New Jack gets in the ring as Akira Taue starts unloading the plunder from the trashcan he brought with him to the ring. New Jack says he’s glad Cyrus got a new guy to manage, because it’s just one more ass for the Hardcore Japanese to kick around. New Jack then reminds us of how Masato Tanaka and Ebessan eliminated the Tag Team champions with ease last week, so they should get a shot at the titles this Sunday.

OR: 86

Hardcore match: Akira Taue (with New Jack) vs. Jamal (with Cyrus): The fans really haven’t seen much from either of these two, so they’re not really into it. Either that, or they’re let down by the fact that this Sunday’s pay-per-view won’t be in Nashville. These two slug it out, and surprisingly nobody interferes. You know New Jack didn’t interfere, because no crutches are broken during this match. Hopefully that will get the crutch rights activists off my back. Jamal uses everyone’s least-favorite Hardcore weapon, the PLASTIC BEER CUP OF DEATH~! The fan he took it from responds by leaving to go buy another one. Great, drive the fans away, Jamal. That will really impress the bosses. Finally Jamal hits a Top Rope Splash to score the pinfall.

Winner: Jamal

OR: 67

CR: 56

MQ: 79

Cyrus and Jamal join Kavovit and Snake for a few words as New Jack watches menacingly from the ring while trying to help Taue up. The announcers congratulate them on their win tonight, but quickly the talk goes to Bill Goldberg. Cyrus tells them that Goldberg has now proved that he’s a deserving champion, but he wants to become one of the legends of this business. Just look at what he’s done since he became champion. He as defeated both of the Road Warriors. Kavovit asks about his interference in Sting’s match with Vince Russo a few weeks ago, and Cyrus says that Sting is the next old-time legend on Goldberg’s list. Cyrus then challenges Sting to face Goldberg this Sunday.

OR: 81

(Jamal gained in over from 65 to 66.)

After Cyrus leaves, the announcers stall for time as the ring crew gets all the Hardcore weaponry out of the ring. Suddenly, the crowd pops as Mick Foley’s music hits. Foley join the announcers to talk about SEX On The Beach. He says he heard New Jack earlier, so he’s decided that tonight, Masato Tanaka and Ebessan will be in a match to determine who will face Disco Inferno and Konnan this Sunday. Their opponents are Kronik. Oh, and also the Road Warriors. It’s a Triple Threat tag-team match! Foley tells us that Ken Shamrock just visited his office, so we’ll also have Shamrock vs. Scott Hall this Sunday. And if Goldberg wants a piece of Sting, Foley thinks Sting will be more than happy to face Goldberg in a World title match. As for the X title, right now we’ll have a Fatal Four-way to determine the No. 1 contender. The announcers ask about Shane Douglas’ challenge earlier tonight, and Foley says he doesn’t think that Shane Douglas is ready to get that hardcore, but he’ll find an appropriate challenger by Sunday.

OR: 92

(Mick Foley gained in over from 91 to 92.)

Fatal Four-way X division No. 1 contender’s match: Chris Chetti vs. Psychosis vs. Brian Lawler vs. Damien 666: Here’s a scary thought – Brian Lawler looks like the best guy in this match. He’s on fire, scoring a pinfall on Chetti two minutes into the match. Damien hits the ring, and he lasts a little longer than Chetti, but at about the 6-minute mark Lawler hits the Hip Hop Drop on him to score his second pinfall of the match. Lawler continues to dominate against Psychosis, as Snake and Kavovit debate the possibility of Lawler defeating TAKA Michinoku this Sunday. Sadly, the world may never know. Lawler makes a mistake, and Psychosis quickly gains control. Sky Twister Press! Lawler gets pinned, and Psychosis is going to Florida this weekend.

Winner: Psychosis

OR: 72

CR: 64

MQ: 80

Jeff Jarrett comes to the ring to talk about his match with Gangrel. He tells us he’s facing the possibility of not having a match this Sunday, which draws a few boos from the crowd. He tells the crowd that he’s treating his match tonight as his pay-per-view match, and then calls out Gangrel.

OR: 81

Jeff Jarrett vs. Gangrel: The announcers now discuss what it would mean for someone like Jeff Jarrett to be left off the pay-per-view, completely missing out on this match. They’re not missing much, however. After about five minutes, Jarrett finished him off with the Stroke.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 76

CR: 75

MQ: 77

Look, on the video screen – is that a midget? Oh, it’s just the new guy. You know, that Mexican lightweight who’s coming soon. We see all his high-flying moves again, but this time at the end, he actually speaks in broken English! “TNA – I’m coming!”

OR: 49

Triple Threat No. 1 contender’s tag team match: Road Warriors vs. Kronik (with Cyrus) vs. Masato Tanaka & Ebessan (with New Jack): Bryan Clark and Ebessan start, and it’s obvious that the Hardcore Japanese still have issues with Cyrus’ group. Before long, Tanaka and Adams have joined in, brawling all over the ring. Hawk and Animal look at each other and shrug, then get in the ring and attack both teams! The referee has lost all control of this match. The brawling continues, and eventually the Hardcore Japanese have Clark isolated on one side of the ring, and the Road Warriors have Adams in the opposite corner. Doomsday Device! Hawk scores the pin on Adams. The referee tries to re-establish some semblance of order as he gets Clark out of the ring. Eventually, it’s back down to one-on-one, with Animal and Tanaka. From here, we get a great scientific match. Oh, who am I kidding? They battle for about ten more minutes, before Tanaka hits a Roaring Elbow on Animal to pick up the pin. The Road Warriors look upset, but the Hardcore Japanese offer then handshakes as a sign of respect. They all shake, and the Road Warriors raise Tanaka’s and Ebessan’s arms as the crown applauds both teams’ effort.

Winner: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan

OR: 79

CR: 76

MQ: 82

OR: 77

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 8002

Best segment: Interview with Mick Foley (92)

Worst segment: Video for debuting wrestler (49)

Best match: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan over Road Warriors and Kronik (79)

[LoveMuscle]

Sunday, June 29, 2003

TNA SEX On The Beach

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, we’re coming to you live from the Sun Dome in Tampa, Florida, for SEX On The Beach! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show!

Kavovit: We have a terrific main event tonight, featuring two of the top stars in all of sports entertainment. It’s Sting and Bill Goldberg, tonight, for the World title!

Snake: It doesn’t get much bigger than that! But also we have TAKA Michinoku defending his X title against Psychosis, and Disco Inferno and Konnan defending the Tag Team titles against the Hardcore Japanese, Masato Tanaka and Ebessan.

Kavovit: We also have Ken Shamrock taking on Scott Hall, and Shane Douglas defending his Hardcore title tonight. Commissioner Mick Foley was supposed to announce his opponent here tonight, but we have some footage to show you from earlier today. Take a look at this.

On the video screen, we see Mick Foley walking into the building, carrying a small gym bag. He greets several members of the production crew backstage, and enters his office. The door closes, and suddenly we hear a lot of yelling and objects being broken. The door opens, and Shane Douglas backs out, holding a baseball bat!

Douglas: You think I’m not ready to get hardcore, Foley? You’d better think again. If you can pick your sorry ass up off the floor, come get your ass franchised tonight!

OR: 88

(Shane Douglas gained in over from 73 to 76.)

Vince Russo comes out with TAKA Michinoku. He welcomes everyone in attendance to SEX On The Beach. Tonight’s show is all about Sports Entertainment Xtreme, and it starts right here with TAKA Michinoku and the X division championship. Russo tells Psychosis to come on out so the big SEX celebration can begin sooner.

OR: 78

NWA X title match: Psychosis vs. TAKA Michinoku © (with Vince Russo): What a way to start off a pay-per-view! This was a great match, which really opened the eyes of the fans at ringside, as well as some of their fellow wrestlers. This is somewhat different than the standard X-division match, as both men throw in a lot of mat wrestling to go along with the high-flying moves. The fans really start to get into the match as the men start stacking move upon move, and it starts to look like Psychosis might actually pull off a win. However, the referee catches and inadvertent thumb to the eye, and as he tries to regain his vision, the men continue the match. Meanwhile, Russo picks up a chair. He swings, but hits TAKA instead of Psychosis! The ref finally gets back into the match as Psychosis climbs the ropes. Sky Twister Press! The ref counts to three, and Psychosis celebrates his win. Meanwhile, Russo starts going crazy, as his plans for SEX for tonight start to fall apart. Finally, he notices that the chairshot is being replayed on the video screen, and he gets the referee’s attention. He points out the video screen, and when the referee sees Russo hitting TAKA, he waives his arms and takes the belt away from Psychosis. He tells the ring announcer that Psychosis has been disqualified due to outside interference, and TAKA is the winner. Russo pulls TAKA out of the ring as Psychosis has a temper tantrum.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 81

CR: 73

MQ: 90

(The NWA X title has gained in image from 81 to 83.)

NWA Tag Team title match: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Disco Inferno & Konnan (with Vince Russo): On his way to the ring, Russo tells us one down, two to go. New Jack doesn’t have a crutch, and there aren’t any at ringside, so unless there’s one hiding under the ring, he won’t be getting involved. It’s a pretty good match, but it would be unfair to compare it to the first one. This one’s really a tale of two matches: when Ebessan is in the ring, SEX has the advantage. When Tanaka’s in, SEX is at the disadvantage. Russo figures this out, and Konnan and Disco isolate Ebessan in the ring for an extended period of time. However, Ebessan makes the hot tag, and Tanaka hits the ring. There’s no stopping Tanaka, and it isn’t very long before Tanaka hits the Roaring Elbow on Konnan. Ebessan recovers enough to prevent Disco Inferno from breaking up the count, and New Jack hits the ring to celebrate the new champions. Russo tries to get the referee to overturn this match too, but the video screen shows the clean pin, so he upholds the decision.

Winner: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan

OR: 77

CR: 71

MQ: 83

The camera cuts backstage to a dimly lit room. Is this another one of those videos from that Mexican kid? No, that’s Mick Foley’s voice we hear. Knowing that, we can make out his figure in the dim light, and it’s most definitely not a lightweight. Foley tells Douglas that tonight he will defend his Hardcore title against his worst nightmare – Cactus Jack! The lights come up, and we see Foley wearing a Cactus Jack shirt and a red plaid shirt. Foley tells Douglas that he most definitely will not have a nice day.

OR: 84

NWA Hardcore title match: Cactus Jack vs. Shane Douglas ©: Douglas is in the ring, all smiles, until Jack walks out with a 2x4 wrapped in barbed wire. Douglas starts complaining to the referee, who reminds him that it is a Hardcore match. Douglas begins the attack as Jack is getting into the ring. This is not like either of the earlier matches, either. No high-flying, no technical wrestling, just two guys beating the hell out of each other. Cactus Jack is much more experienced in these kinds of matches, but Douglas always seems to retake the advantage with a well-placed ball shot. If you like seeing Mick Foley punched in the groin, this is the match for you. Call your cable company and order the replay now! Oh, sorry about that. Douglas tries for the Franchiser, but Jack is just too fat for Douglas to execute the move. Jack gets control, and when he gets Douglas laid out, he reaches under the ring and pulls out a sack. What could possibly be in there? If you said “thumb tacks,” you’re right. Foley empties the bag on the floor in front of the announcers’ desk and pulls Douglas over there. Double Underhook DDT onto the thumb tacks! That’s all. Cactus Jack raises his arm in celebration, but when the referee hands him the Hardcore title, he realizes what he’s done. At this point, he ceases being Cactus Jack and reverts to commissioner Foley, as he looks upset that he’s actually won the title belt.

Winner: Cactus Jack

OR: 76

CR: 79

MQ: 72

(The NWA Hardcore title has gained in image from 54 to 58.)

Ken Shamrock (with Alicia Shamrock) vs. Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): Russo is obviously still upset that Sports Entertainment Xtreme has lost the Tag Team titles, and he tells the camera that there’s no way Hall is losing. Shamrock appears to gain the advantage about five minutes in when Scott Hall starts trying to be funny for Alicia. With this turn of events, Russo goes to Plan B. He grabs Alicia, which of course distracts Ken. Hall tries to roll him up from behind, but Shamrock rolls through, right into the Ankle Lock! Hall taps out as Ken yells at Russo to let her go or he’ll break Hall’s ankle. Hall screams in pain and begs Russo to let her go. He does, and Ken releases the hold and slides out of the ring.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 86

CR: 85

MQ: 88

At this point, they take time to honor a local radio station’s contest winner, Coqui. He won ringside seats to the show, but his extra-special surprise was that Jeff Jarrett would sit with him during tonight’s main event. Wasn’t that a nice touch? Jarrett comes out and congratulates Coqui, as several people sitting near him start getting autographs and photographs - from Jarrett, of course.

OR: 84

NWA World title match: Sting vs. Bill Goldberg © (with Cyrus): Good match, but incredible crowd reaction. Sting is one of the most beloved wrestlers in the world, and Goldberg has become one of the most hated. In what must be one of the longest matches of Goldberg’s career, Sting appears like he’s going to pick up the win, but somehow after nearly 25 minutes, Goldberg finally starts to dominate. Try as he might, not even Sting can kick out of the pin after a Jackhammer. Cyrus starts hopping around, hugging Goldberg, as the fans start to pelt the ring with their trash. Goldberg continues to look stoically at Sting, before climbing the turnbuckle closest to Jarrett. Goldberg points at him, and Jarrett yells back that he’s next.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 87

CR: 90

MQ: 81

(Sting dropped in over from 97 to 96. Bill Goldberg gained in over from 85 to 88. The NWA World title gained in image from 83 to 85.)

OR: 82

Buy rate: 1.79

Attendance: 18399

Best segment: Shane Douglas attacks Mick Foley (88)

Worst segment: Mick Foley over Shane Douglas (76)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Sting (87)

[LoveMuscle]

Tuesday, July 1, 2003

Now that was an awesome pay-per-view last Sunday night. Even the worst match was pretty good and told a compelling story.

East Coast Wrestling Association was once again forced to cancel their show on Sunday, and as a result the company has now gone bankrupt. Also, Maryland Championship Wrestling and Combat Zone Wrestling have all folded due to the declining wrestling industry. Out of the carnage, we find one “diamond in the rough” that we have signed and sent to Japan for further development.

Our sponsorship agreement with Nintendo has come to an end. Strangely, we fill their advertising slots almost immediately with one of their competitors, Playstation 2.

Ron Killings’ injury looks like it may have been worse than our medics originally thought. Without being able to appear on television, we’re afraid that his morale will continue to drop with each TV show and pay-per-view event he misses due to his broken arm. We felt that the best thing to do was to let him go and them bring him back after he heals up. Also, Michael Modest’s contract has come to an end, and even though he’s quite talented, we haven’t really found a place for him. We wish him the best of luck.

We received a decent influx of talent from Japan today. Steven Kavovit had eight guys that he deemed were ready to be promoted to the active roster. In addition to the new guy we have yet to debut, there are some pretty good performers in there. A couple aren’t very over, and only three are especially charismatic, but still as a whole they provide a nice talent upgrade. Besides those who haven’t debuted yet, here’s what our active roster looks like today (faces in blue, heels in red, tweeners in black, all followed by their current over):

MAIN EVENT

Sting (95)

UPPER MIDCARD

Jeff Jarrett (85)

Curt Hennig (84)

Road Warrior Hawk (81)

Road Warrior Animal (78)

MIDCARDERS

Jody Fleisch (86)

Ken Shamrock (85)

Masato Tanaka (80)

Psychosis (75)

Ebessan (70)

Norman Smiley (70)

Anthony Durante (65)

Damien 666 (63)

Chris Chetti (62)

Brian Lawler (71)

Scott Hall (89)

Bill Goldberg (88)

TAKA Michinoku (84)

Sonny Siaki (80)

B.G. James (78)

Marcus Bagwell (78)

Disco Inferno (77)

Konnan (75)

Shane Douglas (75)

Johnny Smith (68)

Jamal (66)

Gangrel (65)

Bryan Clark (64)

Steven Richards (64)

Malice (63)

Brian Adams (62)

LOWER MIDCARDERS

Perry Saturn (60)

Akira Taue (52)

OPENERS

none

JOBBERS

none

MANAGERS

New Jack (84)

Alicia Shamrock (72)

Steve Corino (72)

Vince Russo (83)

Cyrus (78)

NON-WRESTLERS

Mick Foley (91)

TAG TEAMS {members} (experience)

Road Warriors {Road Warrior Hawk & Road Warrior Animal} (100)

Kronik {Brian Adams & Bryan Clark} (85)

TITLES (image) {current holder}

NWA World (85) {Bill Goldberg}

NWA X (83) {TAKA Michinoku}

NWA Tag Team (78) {Masato Tanaka & Ebessan}

NWA Hardcore (58) {Mick Foley}

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, July 2, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event, when Curt Hennig challenges Bill Goldberg for the World title!

Kavovit: Goldberg successfully defended his title against Sting last Sunday at SEX On The Beach. But last week in Chattanooga, Goldberg was wrestling Ron Killings, and Killings suffered an injury that will keep him out of action for several months. Killings’ good friend, Curt Hennig, has challenged Goldberg here tonight.

Snake: Also tonight, Psychosis will face a newcomer from Japan, Jun Akiyama. Psychosis put on one whale of a match last Sunday, and I thought that he had beaten TAKA Michinoku for the X title.

Kavovit: I think everyone thought so, until Vince Russo used the video screen to his advantage. He had the referee watch the replay and disqualify Psychosis.

Snake: But Russo was the one who interfered!

Kavovit: The former Hardcore champion, Shane Douglas, will be taking on Anthony Durante tonight in a non-Hardcore match, and then we have another match that, well, take a look at this video, shot earlier today.

On the video screen, we see Ebessan walk into the Hardcore Japanese’s dressing room wearing the Tag Team title belt. New Jack smiles when he walks in.

New Jack: Damn, now that’s a pretty picture, you wearing that Tag Team title belt. It looks just like that was made for you.

Ebessan: * speaks Japanese *

New Jack: Yeah, Masato Tanaka did good too, and I’ll tell him when he gets here.

Ebessan: * speaks Japanese *

New Jack: What the hell do you mean, you’ve got someone to join our group? Who do you have in mind?

Ebessan: * speaks Japanese *

New Jack: Who are you talking about?

Ebessan holds up his finger and walks out of the room. A moment later, he returns with the Mexican kid from all those videos.

New Jack: Him? Oh, hell, no. Did you forget who we are? We are the Hardcore Japanese, and he’s neither Hardcore nor Japanese.

Ebessan: * speaks Japanese *

Mexican guy: * speaks Spanish *

New Jack: You think you’re hardcore, huh? OK, I’ll tell you what. I’ll talk to commissioner Foley and get you a Hardcore match tonight. If you win, you’re in. But no interference – you hear me, Ebessan? If he can’t win a Hardcore match on his own, he don’t belong in our group.

Both men nod as New Jack leaves the room.

OR: 88

(Ebessan gained in over from 70 to 71.)

Kavovit: So we get to see this kid make his debut tonight … in a Hardcore match?

Snake: Well, I question why he would want to join the Hardcore Japanese in the first place. I mean, maybe he’s tougher than he looks, so it all could depend on who New Jack and Mick Foley get to be his opponent.

Kavovit: Well, I guess we’re going to find out. Here comes New Jack and this kid, so I guess the match has been made.

New Jack comes out with the kid, having him pull a trashcan filled with the usual Hardcore plunder behind him. New Jack tosses the trashcan into the ring, gets in the ring, and takes the microphone from the ring announcer’s hand.

New Jack: Weighing in at, uh, 150 pounds, from somewhere in Mexico, … what’s your name, kid?

Mexican guy: * speaks Spanish *

New Jack: Yeah, right. From somewhere in Mexico, Piloto Suicida! And his opponent … me!

Hardcore match: Piloto Suicida vs. New Jack: The match starts right away with New Jack nailing Suicida with the microphone. It’s clear very quickly that Suicida is in way over his head. The microphone is still turned on in the ring, so we hear New Jack taunt him throughout the match.

New Jack: You think you’re Hardcore, boy?

New Jack gets a crutch and breaks it over Suicida’s back, so this is definitely a New Jack Match™. The fans are quiet – they don’t know how to respond to this. Ebessan walks through the curtain, but quickly Masato Tanaka and Akira Taue are there to hold him back.

New Jack: You see this? He ain’t Hardcore!

Finally, New Jack lands a Piledriver and covers to get the three. A total squash from the start.

Winner: New Jack

OR: 59

CR: 48

MQ: 70

New Jack and the Hardcore Japanese leave, and only Ebessan looks back at Piloto Suicida as he struggles to get to his feet. The ring crew starts cleaning up the Hardcore plunder as Suicida slowly makes his way to the back. Finally, some vaguely familiar music hits, and Steve Corino comes out to join the announcers.

Corino: Hey, kid! Piloto Suicida! Hold on a second! A few weeks ago I made my return to TNA to take part in the Hardcore Battle Royal. You know what I got out of it? A busted head and a slight concussion. Look at my forehead. See all those scars? That’s what being Hardcore will get you. You don’t want to be Hardcore. Look at you – you’re not cut out for Hardcore matches. You should be sticking to X-division competition, like you said in one of your videos. Look, I’m putting together a group of wrestlers who represent old-school wrestling, not this hardcore stuff. I know the reason you went to New Jack was because of the language barrier. If you’re looking for someone to do the talking for you, I would be more than happy to help you out. What do you say?

Corino extends his hand. Suicida, cautious after his experience with New Jack, slowly accepts the offered handshake. Corino puts his arm around Suicida’s shoulder and helps him backstage.

OR: 81

(Steve Corino gained in over from 72 to 73.)

Shane Douglas hits the ring with a microphone. He tries to make excuses for losing to Mick Foley last Sunday. Foley said he wasn’t going to be in the match, so Douglas didn’t prepare for him; he spent too much time on the beach and got sunburned; he ate some bad food just before the match and he wasn’t feeling well. The fans don’t seem to be buying any of his reasons. Douglas says he’s ready for tonight’s match against someone he has a lot of history with.

OR: 76

Anthony Durante vs. Shane Douglas: The announcers tell the story about Shane Douglas and the Pitbulls in ECW and the broken neck. Even all these years later, you can tell there’s a lot of hatred between the two. Douglas takes Durante’s anger and uses it against him. Well, he uses a little bit of cheating, too. But either way, Douglas manages to stay in command for most of the match and eventually hits the Franchiser for the pin.

Winner: Shane Douglas

OR: 71

CR: 67

MQ: 75

On the video screen, the words “Haas Of Pain” flicker on the screen. Then a WWE-style video is shown. In fact, I think that’s the WWE logo in the bottom corner that’s blurred out with a TNA logo over it. A ring announcer (who sounds mysteriously like Howard Finkel) introduces Charlie Haas, and then introduces Crash Holly. We then see clips of matches with both men hitting their moves. Finally, the screen splits, and we see both of them getting a pinfall victory at the same time. They are announced as the winners, and then the screen flickers with “Haas Of Pain” once again. Then we see the words “coming next week.”

OR: 84

Backstage, Curt Hennig is seen taping up his wrists. He tells Bill Goldberg that the man he injured last week, Ron Killings, was his friend. “If you hurt my friends, then you hurt my pride. I gotta be a man, I can’t let it slide.” A few fans in the crowd catch the Real American reference and chuckle.

OR: 76

In their locker room, Cyrus is standing by with Bill Goldberg. Cyrus reminds us that Goldberg is on his way to cementing his status as a legend in this business. Last month he defeated Sting and the Road Warriors, and he put Ron Killings on the shelf for six months. Curt Hennig played right into their hands, because he was the next legend on their list to destroy. And after that?

Goldberg: Jeff Jarrett – you’re next!

OR: 86

Psychosis vs. Jun Akiyama: This is Akiyama’s debut in TNA, and he impresses right out of the gate with a very good match. Although, after last Sunday, getting a good match out of Psychosis isn’t much of a surprise. Back and forth the action goes, as both men seem content to hit suplexes on each other as opposed to the X division style that Psychosis wrestled last Sunday. Either way, it’s all good with me. At the end, Psychosis hits a Sky Twister Press (the one high-flying move in the match) to score the pinfall.

Winner: Psychosis

OR: 76

CR: 66

MQ: 87

The cameras cut to inside the Sports Entertainment Xtreme locker room, where the wrestlers are cutting up and having a good time. Vince Russo walks in and looks around, shaking his head. He gets everyone’s attention when he kicks over a television.

Russo: You guys are pathetic! Last Sunday was SEX On The Beach – our show! It was supposed to be all out SEX. But you guys had to go and screw things up. Scott Hall – what were you thinking, man? Were you thinking with the little head instead of the big one? And you two, Disco Inferno and Konnan. What happened? You were the champions! It’s easy to stay champion, all you had to do was get counted out or get disqualified, and you’d still be champions! Pitiful. And even you, TAKA Michinoku. The only reason you still have that belt is because of my genius to get the referee to reverse his decision after Psychosis pinned your ass! Look, I didn’t form Sports Entertainment Xtreme just so I’d have some guys to shoot the shit with and drink beer with. I formed Sports Entertainment Xtreme to take over this friggin’ company! You guys are the biggest bunch of losers I’ve ever seen in my entire life. I thought we had gotten rid of all the slackers when we kicked out Rick Steiner. Maybe we need to get rid of some more underachievers! Then again, maybe all you need is some motivation. Maybe we just need a badass in our group to inspire some toughness.

With that, Russo opens the door. Unfortunately, the camera is on the wrong side of the door, so we can’t see who’s there, but all the members of SEX do. There are a few smiles, a few bulging eyes, and a few heads nodding. They seem to be in agreement with Russo about this new guy, whoever it is.

OR: 95

(Vince Russo gained in over from 83 to 87.)

NWA World title match: Curt Hennig vs. Bill Goldberg © (with Cyrus): Hennig attacks from the start, but it doesn’t take long before he realizes that he’s no match for Goldberg in that sort of match. But even in that short time, it’s already too late. Goldberg hits all his offensive moves, ending it with the Jackhammer. After the match is over, Goldberg looks like he isn’t done as he picks up Hennig – but Jeff Jarrett hits the ring with a chair! Goldberg gets nailed in the back, and he goes flying through the ropes to the floor. However, he lands on his feet and looks ready to get back in the ring, until Cyrus holds him back. Jarrett gestures towards his waist, the universal signal for a title match. Cyrus shakes his head no, but Goldberg reiterates that Jarrett is next.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 82

CR: 85

MQ: 77

OR: 79

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 9013

Best segment: Vince Russo chews out SEX (95)

Worst segment: New Jack over Piloto Suicida (51)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Curt Hennig (82)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, July 9, 2003

I thought last Wednesday’s shows was one of the better ones we’ve had. We got several new characters introduced and several more hinted at. The groundwork for the main event of this month’s pay-per-view, Nonstop Summer, has been laid. Also, SEX seems to be taking a step towards a new attitude. And after the beating New Jack delivered to Piloto Suicida last week, many fans are wondering if a heel turn is in the works.

Speaking of that, after the show was over last week, Piloto Suicida complained about how stiff New Jack was working in their match. Well, duh, it was a Hardcore match! Also, Curt Hennig complained about Bill Goldberg. That’s the third different wrestler to complain about him, maybe there’s something to that.

During our house show Friday night, Scott Hall got into a fight backstage. With his track record, I felt that the best thing to do was suspend him without pay for three months. We actually had some tentative plans for him, but of course those have been scrapped - for now.

The FLI yo-yo is currently on an upswing, as they have risen to National level once again. You can bet we'll be watching to see if they fall back to Cult status once again, and if so we'll be waiting to see which workers they release.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s Tag Team title match!

Kavovit: The Hardcore Japanese will be defending their titles against Kronik. You know those teams have had issues in the past, and I doubt much will be settled tonight. Also, we have Curt Hennig taking on Jun Akiyama a little bit later.

Snake: And last week, we saw two men announce they will be making their debut tonight! I can't wait to see Haas Of Pain in action.

Kavovit: But now making his way out here is the commissioner, the Hardcore champion, Mick Foley! Hello, Mick.

Foley: Hello Steven, Bart. I have an announcement to make.

Snake: Did you buy out another company?

Foley: No, no, it's nothing like that. See, a week and a half ago at SEX On The Beach, Shane Douglas was supposed to defend this Hardcore title against an opponent of my choosing. When I arrived at the building, I still had not made up my mind who that opponent was going to be. However, before I made a decision, Shane Douglas attacked me with a baseball bat. You know, my brain has been scrambled a few times before, but Douglas really did a number on me. In fact, he brought out something in me I have been trying to keep buried for quite a while. He brought out Cactus Jack! You saw what happens when Cactus Jack gets involved in a Hardcore match. The end result, unfortunately, was this title ending up being presented to me. I don't want this title - I'm retired! So, as of this moment, I am declaring the Hardcore title to be vacant.

Kavovit: Oh, my! So what does the future hold for this belt?

Foley: Next week, we're going to have a Hardcore Fatal Four-way to crown a new champion. However, Shane Douglas will not be one of those participating in the match. First, he didn't win that title by being Hardcore - he hid under the ring until everyone else was eliminated, then snuck in from behind to get a cheap victory. Then he showed he wasn't very bright, by getting Cactus Jack involved. Finally, he proved that even a decrepit, old, washed-up, retired has-been can get more Hardcore than him.

Snake: So who's going to be in that match?

Foley: I've already extended three bids. One was to Vince Russo for any member of Sports Entertainment Xtreme. Another was to New Jack for any of the Hardcore Japanese. The third was to Cyrus for any member of his Virus. The last spot remains open to any other competitor besides Shane Douglas. Thank you, and enjoy the rest of the show.

OR: 85

On the video screen, the same Haas Of Pain video that played last week is shown. Well, at least the first part of it. Charlie Haas is introduced as a former Tag Team champion, and Crash Holly is introduced as a 23-time Hardcore champion. Then the words "Haas Of Pain … now!"

OR: 88

Norman Smiley & Perry Saturn vs. Haas Of Pain: A good technical match. The mat wrestling seen here is quite unlike anything the fans at the TNA Asylum have ever seen. Unfortunately, that leads to them sitting quietly as opposed to making a lot of noise. It's pretty much all Haas Of Pain, who look very impressive in their debut. Haas hits a Gutwrench Suplex as Holly lands a flying elbow on Saturn. The announcers call that move the Haas Crasher. Whatever you want to call it, it gets the pinfall.

Winner: Haas Of Pain

OR: 62

CR: 58

MQ: 80

Backstage, Cyrus stands with Kronik. Tonight they get another shot at the Tag Team titles, plus they get the added bonus of getting to take out two of their rivals at the same time. While Cyrus continues to run down the Hardcore Japanese, Kronik nod in agreement while looking menacing in the background.

OR: 83

(Brian Adams gained in over from 62 to 63. Bryan Clark gained in over from 64 to 65.)

Meanwhile, over in the Hardcore Japanese's locker room, New Jack is standing by with Masato Tanaka and Ebessan. He talks about how much they hate Cyrus and all of his men. New Jack says that offering them a title shot was just baiting the trap, and now they get a chance to take out Kronik.

OR: 75

The cameras cut to the commissioner's office, where we see Mick Foley busily working at his desk. There's a knock at the door, and Steve Corino enters.

Corino: You wanted to see me, Mick?

Foley: Yeah, have a seat. I heard you say something last week about putting together a new group of wrestlers.

Corino: Yeah, these guys are really good. In fact, I've got two of them here with me tonight, and they're ready to go if you want!

Foley: Actually, I was thinking about next week's Hardcore title match. Do you have someone for that match?

Corino: Well, no, not really. You see, I'm trying to get away from the Hardcore stuff. If you want, I can probably get someone for next week. But I was glad you asked me here because I wanted to get my guys into the hunt for the X title.

Foley: Oh, they're those kind of wrestlers, eh? Well, I'll tell you what. I'll give them a match tonight that should put them right in the middle of the X title chase if they're halfway competitive. It will be your two guys against the X champion, TAKA Michinoku, and his SEX partner, Sonny Siaki!

Corino: Really? That's great, Mick! Thanks for giving my guys a chance, you won't be disappointed. And I'll get you someone for that Hardcore match too, don't you worry!

With that, Corino leaves the room, and Foley chuckles before getting back to work.

OR: 91

(Steve Corino gained in over from 73 to 74.)

NWA Tag Team title match: The Hardcore Japanese © (with New Jack) vs. Kronik (with Cyrus): It's a very good power match, but the crowd just doesn't seem into it for some reason. And even though it is a power match, Ebessan is able to use his speed advantage over Kronik to keep the slower men at bay. After almost 11 minutes, Clark is down and Ebessan hits a Senton Bomb to score the pin. Almost immediately, Malice and Jamal come out of the back with chairs! They get in the ring and attack the Hardcore Japanese from behind. New Jack gets in the ring, but without a crutch he doesn't know what to do, and is soon beaten down as well.

Winner: The Hardcore Japanese

OR: 68

CR: 67

MQ: 86

Curt Hennig is standing by outside his locker room. He tells us that Jun Akiyama is new here, and hasn't properly been welcomed. He plans on giving him a wrestling lesson, with a graduate project called the Hennig Plex.

OR: 80

TAKA Michinoku and Sonny Siaki are in the ring, while Vince Russo is at the announcers' desk asking who their opponents are supposed to be. Steve Corino comes out to make the introduction.

Ultimo Dragon & Super Crazy (with Steve Corino) vs. TAKA Michinoku & Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Either the crowd just isn't all that familiar with Dragon and Crazy, or they are too shocked to react. However, as long as they put on great matches like this one, the fans had better get used to them. If there was such a thing as a X-division brawl, this would be it. Bodies are flying everywhere, and the referee has a hard time keeping track of who's legal. Siaki hits a Powerbomb off the top rope, and the announcers proclaim Super Crazy to be dead. He kicks out, however, proving them wrong. Asai Moonsault from Ultimo Dragon! I guess if anyone knows how to nail that move, it would be him. Eventually, it looks like Dragon is setting up TAKA for the Dragon Sleeper, but from the back comes Low-Ki! The announcers wonder what he's doing here, since he lost a Loser Leaves Town match back in February. Low-Ki gets in the ring … Ki Krusher on Dragon! Low-Ki slides out of the ring as Russo gets the referee to pay attention to what's going on in the ring. TAKA covers Dragon, and the ref counts the pin. Low-Ki goes after Crazy, but Corino chases him away.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku & Sonny Siaki

OR: 71

CR: 69

MQ: 90

Low-Ki goes to the announcers' desk, where Russo, Michinoku, and Siaki join him. He tells us that the attitude of Sports Entertainment Xtreme is going to change. Low-Ki says that Scott Hall found that out personally last weekend, and it will be a while before we see him again. He tells us Russo brought him back to keep SEX from losing, and tonight was the beginning of that plan.

OR: 71

Curt Hennig vs. Jun Akiyama: Even though this one gets the most crowd reaction of the night, the match is pretty much a disappointment. I guess it just pales in comparison to what Haas Of Pain did earlier tonight, because many of the same moves are used, only they're not as crisp. Finally, after about seven minutes, Hennig nails the Hennig Plex, as promised, to score the win.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 67

CR: 73

MQ: 77

OR: 75

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 9035

Best segment: Steve Corino visits Mick Foley's office (91)

Worst segment: Haas Of Pain over Perry Saturn & Norman Smiley (62)

Best match: TAKA Michinoku & Sonny Siaki over Super Crazy & Ultimo Dragon (71)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, July 16, 2003

Last week was just "one of those nights." The matches, for the most part, were much better than they were perceived to be. I guess four debuts and one return in the same night just isn't good for business.

In the only match that involved only longtime TNA employees, Brian Adams complained afterwards about how stiff Masato Tanaka was working in the Tag Team title match. I knew Tanaka worked stiff when I brought him in, I'm only surprised it took this long for anyone to complain about it.

At our house show yesterday, Steven Richards started a fight backstage. Why don't these guys learn from Scott Hall's mistakes? Richards is suspended for the rest of the month. Since nobody cares about him, I'm not even going to bother explaining his absence on television. However, he had been scheduled to face Sting tonight. I guess I'll have to get another opponent lined up.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s Hardcore title match!

Kavovit: Commissioner Mick Foley made the match last week for the vacant Hardcore title, featuring one member each from Sports Entertainment Xtreme, Cyrus' Virus, the Hardcore Japanese, and someone Steve Corino's bringing in.

Snake: But we don't know yet who any of the four men are!

Kavovit: Well, right now let's go live into the Sports Entertainment Xtreme's locker room to see if we can find out any information.

On the video screen, we see all the members of SEX except for Vince Russo (and Scott Hall, of course) sitting around until Russo walks in.

Russo: OK, guys, good news. I just spoke with Foley, and he's given us a shot at the Road Warriors tonight, with the winners going to Nonstop Summer to challenge The Hardcore Japanese for the Tag Team titles. Who wants in?

James: Hey, you know how bad I want to get rid of the Road Warriors! Sign me up.

Russo: All right, who's going to be your partner?

James: Give me Low-Ki. I want to see what he can do against those two.

Russo: You up for that, Low-Ki?

Low-Ki: You know it!

Russo: Now then, who's going to take our shot at the Hardcore title?

The rest of the guys all offer their services, and finally Russo has to yell to be heard over them. TAKA Michinoku (the smartest man in the room, I'm afraid) figures out how to solve this. He sticks his fist out towards Russo, who just looks at him until he figures out what TAKA's trying to tell him.

Russo: Hey, I've got an idea. We'll do it the old-fashioned way. Everybody stick out your potatoes. One potato, two potato, three potato, four / Five potato, six potato, seven potato, more. Congratulations, Marcus, you get the title shot.

Bagwell: Yes!

Low-Ki: You'd better win, because the cost for failure around here has gotten awfully high.

OR: 100

(Vince Russo gained in over from 87 to 89.)

Kavovit: It looks like Marcus Bagwell will be representing SEX, but how about that bombshell we heard from Russo? Tonight, the Road Warriors will face B.G. James and Low-Ki to determine the No. 1 contenders for the Tag Team titles!

Snake: That should be a good match!

Kavovit: Also tonight, Sting will be taking on Johnny Smith, and Jeff Jarrett will be taking on Jamal.

Snake: I guess that means Jamal won't be representing The Virus, but who will?

On the video screen, we wee a split-screen look at The Virus' dressing room, along with the Hardcore Japanese's locker room. On one side, we see New Jack getting Akira Taue pumped up while Masato Tanaka and Ebessan talk to him in Japanese. On the other half, we see Cyrus giving instructions to Malice. I guess those are two more competitors, but who did Steve Corino find?

OR: 72

(Akira Taue gained in over from 52 to 53. Malice gained in over from 63 to 65.)

Malice, Akira Taue, and Marcus Bagwell come to the ring with their respective managers, but the referee sends all the managers to the back. As the announcer discuss the fourth entrant, suddenly the lights go out and the tune of "Huka Blues" sounds, which can only mean one thing …

NWA Hardcore title Fatal Four-way match: Akira Taue vs. Marcus Bagwell vs. Sabu vs. Malice: The lights come up, and Sabu is mysteriously in the ring behind the other three. They turn and spot Sabu, who attacks Bagwell to start the match. That's just fine with Malice and Taue, who start brawling with each other. The referee tries to keep something resembling order, but fails miserably. Hey, it's a Hardcore match, all the referee is there for is to count the pinfalls or submissions anyways. The first one happens to be on Akira Taue, who gets pinned by Bagwell after a Blockbuster. Bagwell joins Malice for a 2-on-1 beatdown of Sabu. Malice hits a Choke Slam, and Bagwell quickly covers Sabu. However, Malice pulls Bagwell off, breaking up the pin. I guess he figured that he should get the pinfall, since it was his move that put Sabu down, not Bagwell's. They argue, while Sabu rolls to the floor to recover. Malice is not one to argue, and he soon gets exasperated with Bagwell and Choke Slams him too. Instead of going for the cover on him, he reaches outside to grab Sabu … who has a chair! Chairshot to Malice's head! Malice appears to me knocked out, carefully balanced over the middle rope. Sabu pulls him out to the floor, where he makes the pin to eliminate Malice. Bagwell has recovered, and has found a large bag under the ring. He comes up behind Sabu and clubs him in the head with it! Sabu staggers, but doesn't even fall down. Bagwell opens the bag and pulls out styrofoam packing peanuts! No wonder it didn’t hurt Sabu. While Bagwell makes is disappointing discovery, Sabu has retrieved the chair and wallops Bagwell in the back, somehow knocking him into the ring. Sabu hits an Arabian Facebuster, then lands a Triple Jump Moonsault to secure the pin. A good match, considering how these kind of matches usually turn out.

Winner: Sabu

OR: 70

CR: 61

MQ: 80

(The NWA Hardcore title has gained in image from 58 to 62.)

Jeff Jarrett is backstage, talking about how he can't wait to get his hands on Bill Goldberg again. He tried to get a match with him tonight, but Cyrus wouldn't allow it. Instead, Jarrett gets Jamal tonight. No problem, because he'll work his way through everyone Cyrus has to get to Goldberg.

OR: 77

Super Crazy (with Steve Corino) vs. Brian Lawler: You can just about always count on the X division to deliver a good match, and this one doesn't disappoint. However, it's pretty much all Super Crazy from the start, as he hits all of his moves. Those who remember him from ECW even count along in Spanish when he goes for the ten punches in the corner. Crazy eventually finishes off Lawler with a Trifecta Moonsault.

Winner: Super Crazy

OR: 74

CR: 65

MQ: 84

Sting is backstage, ready for his interview. He's not happy about his World title match at SEX On The Beach, but he knows someday soon he'll get another shot at Goldberg. Tonight, however, he'll be facing Johnny Smith. Sting basically promises a squash match. Yeah, that will get the crowd fired up.

OR: 87

Jeff Jarrett vs. Jamal (with Cyrus): Speaking of squash matches, lookie what we have here. No matter how hard Jarrett tries, he can't drag a good match out of Jamal. The crowd carries their end of the bargain, cheering on all of Jarrett's moves. After about five minutes, Jarrett hits an impressive Superplex to score the pin. An incredible display of strength by Jarrett on that one. I guess he's sending a message to Goldberg.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 75

CR: 76

MQ: 76

The camera follows Jarrett back to his locker room, which usually isn't a good sign. Sure enough, when Jarrett passes the vending machines, Kronik jumps out from behind the soda machine and starts working over Jarrett. After about a minute, Ken Shamrock suddenly appears and chases away Kronik before checking on Jarrett.

OR: 75

(Bryan Clark gained in over from 65 to 66. Brian Adams gained in over from 63 to 65.)

Sting vs. Johnny Smith: As he so eloquently predicted, this one's a squash for Sting. Smith sells for him quite well, and it actually turns out to be a good match. However, it's quickly ended when Sting applies the Scorpion Death Lock in the center of the ring. Smith quickly realizes there's no chance of escape, and he taps out.

Winner: Sting

OR: 79

CR: 77

MQ: 82

B.G. James and Low-Ki make their way to the ring with Vince Russo for the main event. James takes the microphone from the ring announcer and tells us that tonight he's finally got the right partner to help him take out the Road Warriors. Low-Ki simply says that tonight they're going to take care of some SEX business, starting right now.

OR: 70

Tag Team No. 1 contender's match: Road Warriors vs. B.G. James & Low-Ki (with Vince Russo): To the surprise of nearly everyone, Low-Ki is able to go toe-to-toe with the Road Warriors, despite being much smaller. Clearly he is far and away the most talented person in this match, despite the difference in size. Someone tell Vince McMahon bigger isn't always better! Low-Ki uses his speed and mat-wrestling ability to complement his strength, a total package that the Road Warriors cannot deal with. Low-Ki hits a Ki-Krusher on Hawk to pick up the win, and James never even got to tag in.

Winner: B.G. James & Low-Ki

OR: 81

CR: 79

MQ: 84

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 9036

Best segment: SEX chooses among their members for tonight's matches (100)

Worst segment: (tie) Interview with B.G. James & Low-Ki; Sabu wins Hardcore Fatal Four-way (70)

Best match: B.G. James & Low-Ki over Road Warriors (81)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, July 23, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event!

Kavovit: Last week, Kronik attacked Jeff Jarrett after his match with Jamal, and Ken Shamrock made the save. As a result, tonight Jarrett will be teaming with Shamrock to take on Kronik.

Snake: Also tonight, B.G. James and Low-Ki will have a warm-up match before this Sunday's Tag Team title match at Nonstop Summer, and Jody Fleisch will be in action also.

Kavovit: But it appears right now that Sports Entertainment Xtreme is making their way to the ring. I wonder what this is about.

Vince Russo gets a microphone and joins the rest of his men in the ring.

Russo: One week ago, B.G. James and Low-Ki earned the right to challenge for the Tag Team titles this Sunday in New Orleans at Nonstop Summer. And you know what? They're going to win those belts from The Hardcore Japanese, too. Sports Entertainment Xtreme has a new attitude. In the past, we used to joke around and have a good time. But those days are gone. Scott Hall forgot that, and Low-Ki punked him out. When Scott Hall recovers, we'll find out if he learned his lesson. Another lesson that has to be learned is that failure is not an option. Last week, one of you failed. I will not put up with losing any more! Marcus Bagwell, you are out of Sports Entertainment Xtreme!

Bagwell: But it's not my fault! I tried to pin Sabu, but Malice pulled me off, and …

Russo: No excuses!

Bagwell: But …

Suddenly, Low-Ki attacks Bagwell, and soon all the other members of SEX join in. Even though the assault only lasts a minute, it's 6-on-1, and Bagwell is left laid out in the middle of the ring.

OR: 81

Osamu Nishimura vs. Gangrel: This is Nishimura's debut, but he doesn't get much offense in. Still, he gets a good match out of Gangrel, and that's a big accomplishment for anyone. But being new, the fans aren't familiar with him, and they could care less about Gangrel, too. Gangrel picks up the win with an Implant DDT.

Winner: Gangrel

OR: 65

CR: 49

MQ: 82

The cameras cut to the vending machines, where Alicia Shamrock is purchasing a soda. Sabu appears, but silently points to the ceiling. Alicia looks up, but suddenly Shane Douglas attacks Sabu! Alicia takes off as Douglas starts using anything he can get his hands on to hit Sabu. Finally, a couple of road agents hold Douglas back while the medics attend to Sabu. Douglas, being the man he is, challenges the battered and bruised Sabu to a Hardcore title match.

OR: 70

Damien 666 vs. Jody Fleisch: The crowd starts to come around for this above-average X-division match. It's really very good, but really Damien is doing all he can to keep up with Fleisch. Damien falls victim to a Phoenix 720 DDT and gets pinned. After the match, Fleisch helps him up, and they shake hands.

Winner: Jody Fleisch

OR: 75

CR: 63

MQ: 87

Backstage, commissioner Mick Foley is hard at work in his office, when Steve Corino bursts through the door.

Foley: Come in, Steve! Thanks for knocking!

Corino: Are you paying attention, Mick? Do you know what is happening around here?

Foley: Hey, I know what you're here for, and don't worry, I've already taken care of it.

Corino: You have?

Foley: Yeah, I've booked Ultimo Dragon against Sonny Siaki, and if Dragon wins he'll get a shot at the X title this Sunday at Nonstop Summer against TAKA Michionoku.

Corino: Well … that's great, Mick, thanks! But what I was here about was Sabu …

Foley: Oh, I've been meaning to congratulate you on finding the most suicidal, homicidal, genocidal maniac in all of wrestling to compete for the Hardcore title.

Corino: Yeah, but earlier tonight Sabu was attacked from behind, and he was beat up so bad he had to be taken to a hospital.

Foley: Really?

Corino: Yeah, but he told me he'd be OK by Sunday, and he wants revenge.

Foley: Well, if he's going to be fine, then he can have his match. And that is final!

Corino: Great! Sabu will kick Shane Douglas' ass. See ya.

Corino leaves, and Foley begins to realize what just happened.

Foley: Did I just give Shane Douglas a Hardcore title match? Dammit!

OR: 87

(Steve Corino gained in over from 74 to 76.)

Anthony Durante & Chris Chetti vs. B.G. James & Low-Ki (with Vince Russo): Low-Ki opens the match by dominating both Durante and Chetti. This one looks like a total squash. Eventually, Low-Ki tags out to James, and he's able to take over where Low-Ki left off. James finally delivers the Dogg Pound on Chetti to pick up the win.

Winner: B.G. James & Low-Ki

OR: 74

CR: 68

MQ: 81

Backstage, Cyrus is standing by with Kronik. He tells Jeff Jarrett that what he got last week was just a sample of what he's going to get tonight. However, he promises that he'll have Kronik leave him in just good enough shape to make it to Sunday, where Bill Goldberg will finish him off. As for Ken Shamrock, Cyrus says he had no business sticking his nose into The Virus' business, and tonight he's going to pay for his insolence.

OR: 89

(Cyrus gained in over from 78 to 80. Bryan Clark gained in over from 66 to 67.)

Sonny Siaki comes to the ring for his match, and of course Vince Russo is out with him. Siaki takes the microphone from the ring announcer and introduces a video clip of him pinning Ultimo Dragon two weeks ago. The announcers remind us that what we're not seeing is Low-Ki's assistance in that pinfall. Siaki promises that history will repeat itself tonight, and Dragon will be pinned again.

OR: 84

Ultimo Dragon (with Steve Corino) vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): This was a great match, but for some reason the fans weren't really into it. At the end, Siaki lures Corino up on the apron, and while the referee tries to get him back on the floor, Siaki holds Dragon while Russo gets the timekeeper's bell. Russo swings … but Dragon ducks, and Siaki is knocked down! Dragon circles Siaki, moving in for the kill. Dragon Sleeper! Corino pulls Russo off the apron, preventing him from interfering any further. Siaki soon taps out.

Winner: Ultimo Dragon

OR: 79

CR: 69

MQ: 90

Ken Shamrock (with Alicia Shamrock) & Jeff Jarrett vs. Kronik (with Cyrus): Kronik takes the early advantage by using their superior teamwork, and isolate Shamrock from Jarrett. Eventually, Shamrock is able to make the hot tag to Jarrett, and the fans come alive. Jarrett is completely in control, and he hits the Stroke on Bryan Clark. However, before he could go for the pin, Bill Goldberg comes from the back and starts brawling with Jarrett. The referee has no choice but to call for the bell. Kronik is working over Shamrock, but suddenly Ebessan and Masato Tanaka come from the back to start slugging it out with Kronik. Jarrett even gets an advantage on Goldberg before all three leave the ring and return to the back with Cyrus.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett & Ken Shamrock by disqualification

OR: 81

CR: 77

MQ: 85

OR: 79

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 9027

Best segment: Interview with Cyrus and Kronik (89)

Worst segment: Gangrel over Osamu Nishimura (65)

Best match: Jeff Jarrett & Ken Shamrock over Kronik (81)

[LoveMuscle]

Sunday, July 27, 2003

New Orleans Arena is the host for tonight's Nonstop Summer pay-per-view. With only four matches, it's the smallest card for a major event we've ever had. However, we feel that the build-up to these four matches is a lot better than in recent months, since we chose not to renew our television contract with the Urban American network. If we had known it would take this long to get another TV contract, we probably would have renewed it for six months. But that's another story for another time.

Anyways, with only four matches on the card, we feel like we need to give the fans in New Orleans another match, so before the pay-per-view hits the air, they get to see:

Road Warriors vs. Malice & Jamal (with Cyrus): No real issue here, just two teams looking to kick some butt. It's a pretty good match, with all four displaying some of their power moves. The most impressive display of strength comes at the end, when Animal gets Jamal up on his shoulders, in position for the Doomsday Device. It connects, and Animal scores the pin.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 76

CR: 71

MQ: 81

TNA Nonstop Summer

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, we’re coming to you live from the New Orleans Arena in New Orleans, Louisiana, for Nonstop Summer! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show!

Kavovit: We have a terrific main event tonight, featuring two of the biggest names in all of sports entertainment. It’s Jeff Jarrett and Bill Goldberg, tonight, for the World title!

Snake: Two months ago at May-hem, Goldberg defeated Jarrett to become the champion. Finally, Jarrett gets a chance to win it back tonight.

Kavovit: Also, TAKA Michinoku will be defending his X title against Ultimo Dragon.

Snake: Dragon has made a significant impact in the short time he's been in TNA, and tonight's his first shot at the gold.

Kavovit: TAKA Michinoku's Sports Entertainment Xtreme cohorts, B.G. James and Low-Ki, will be challenging The Hardcore Japanese for the Tag Team titles.

Snake: Low-Ki and James earned the title shot with a very impressive win over former Tag Team champions the Road Warriors a couple of weeks ago, but the Hardcore Japanese have had their hands full with Cyrus' Virus, so will they be focused on their challengers tonight?

Kavovit: But our opening match features Sabu against Shane Douglas for the Hardcore title.

Snake: Last Wednesday on Total Nonstop Action, Douglas attacked Sabu and sent hi to the hospital. Will Sabu be in any shape to defend his title?

Kavovit: Well, here comes Shane Douglas, so I guess we'll see what he has to say about it.

Douglas gets in the ring to tell everyone that Sabu won't be here because of how bad he got busted up four days ago. He tells commissioner Mick Foley to bring the belt out and hand it over to Douglas. Douglas tells the referee to begin counting. The ref gets to six before Sabu's music sounds.

OR: 84

(Shane Douglas gained in over from 75 to 77.)

NWA Hardcore title match: Sabu © (with Steve Corino) vs. Shane Douglas: Sabu still is wearing bandages as a result of last Wednesday's attack. However, that doesn't prevent him from gaining the early advantage, thanks to the Singapore cane he brought with him. However, Douglas hits some punches on Sabu's bandaged ribs, and that turns the tide immediately. Douglas takes control for the next several minutes, while Corino is discreetly getting things set up at ringside for the closing minutes of the match. Sure enough, Sabu gets time to recover when Douglas misses an Elbow Drop from the top rope. Corino slides a Playstation 2 console to Sabu, and he breaks it over Douglas' head. That ought to be worth a couple of extra bucks from our main sponsor! Corino helps get Douglas positioned on a table at ringside, and Sabu comes off the top rope, putting himself and Douglas through the table. Back in the ring they go, and Corino passes a chair to Sabu. Arabian Facebuster! That's enough to get the pin. As Sabu and Corino celebrate, Douglas recovers and nails both of them with a chair before walking off.

Winner: Sabu

OR: 71

CR: 66

MQ: 77

(The NWA Hardcore title gained in image from 62 to 64.)

Backstage, Vince Russo talks about how lucky Ultimo Dragon had to be in order to beat Sonny Siaki and earn a X title match. However, Russo promises that Dragon will not be so lucky tonight when he faces TAKA Michinoku.

OR: 77

NWA X title match: Ultimo Dragon (with Steve Corino) vs. TAKA Michinoku © (with Vince Russo): Great match, but we were hoping it would be. The crowd could have been more into the match, but that's not because of anything the wrestlers did. In fact, the crowd reaction built throughout this fast-paced match. I'd have to say this match put the "Nonstop" in Nonstop Summer. Russo tries to interfere, but Corino chases him to the back, and neither is seen again for the rest of the match. Without Russo, Dragon takes command of TAKA, and it seems like there may be a new champion. While TAKA lies in the corner, he goes into his trunks. The fans on that side of the ring spot the brass knuckles, but the referee doesn't, and neither does Dragon. Maybe he saw them just before TAKA landed the knockout punch, but he may not remember it later. TAKA stuffs the knux back into this tights and crawls over to get the cover and the win.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 80

CR: 68

MQ: 92

New Jack comes out with Masato Tanaka and Ebessan before their match.

New Jack: Earlier tonight, I heard the announcers say that this team may not be focused on tonight's match. Well, I hate to tell you this, but they were wrong. Now everyone knows we've had our problems with Cyrus and The Virus, but not even that is more important to us right now than these Tag Team titles. Ever since those two losers from SEX got this title shot, that's all we've been preparing for. So Vince Russo, get your cracker ass out here with Off-Key and Big Gut James.

OR: 84

NWA Tag Team title match: The Hardcore Japanese © (with New Jack) vs. B.G. James & Low-Ki (with Vince Russo): The SEX team doesn't look very happy after hearing what New Jack called them, so they take their aggressions out on New Jack's team to start the match. Well, Low-Ki does, at least. He dominates Ebessan, and Tanaka too for a while. James tags in, but he can't do much against Tanaka. The Hardcore Japanese control James for the next few minutes, and it looks like they're going to keep their titles. Russo tries to interfere, but New Jack pulls him off the apron and starts choking him. The referee tries to get them separated, not paying any attention to what's going on in the ring. If he had, he would have seen Kronik in the ring. Tanaka turns around - High Times! Kronik retreats to the curtain, standing there to watch as Low-Ki covers Tanaka and the ref gets back in the ring to make the three count. Kronik celebrates nearly as much as James and Low-Ki, until Akira Taue comes through the curtain behind them to begin the attack. New Jack joins in to even the odds, and eventually Ebessan and Tanaka come over as the brawl is taken backstage.

Winner: B.G. James & Low-Ki

OR: 78

CR: 70

MQ: 86

Backstage, Cyrus is standing with Bill Goldberg. Cyrus says Jeff Jarrett's time in this promotion has passed, and now it's time for Goldberg to add another legend to his collection. Goldberg simply says, "You're next."

OR: 78

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett vs. Bill Goldberg © (with Cyrus): This must be the match the fans came to see, since they're making the most noise that they have all night. Jarrett begins hot, but soon Goldberg takes control. An extended heat segment on Jarrett follows. This match is totally formulaic, but the formula is a good one. Oh, and the wrestlers carry their end of it quite well. Jarrett makes a comeback, but some timely cheating helps Goldberg to retake the advantage. Jackhammer, that's it.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 84

CR: 85

MQ: 83

(The NWA World title has gained in image from 85 to 87.)

OR: 80

Buy rate: 1.93

Attendance: 20173

Best segment: (tie) Interview with Shane Douglas; Interview with New Jack and The Hardcore Japanese; Bill Goldberg over Jeff Jarrett (84)

Worst segment: Sabu over Shane Douglas (71)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Jeff Jarrett (84)

[LoveMuscle]

Wednesday, July 30, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event, when Sting takes on Konnan!

Kavovit: That should be a good match. Also tonight we have both members of Haas Of Pain in action in singles matches.

Snake: They’re an exciting young team that has really taken TNA by storm. I know they have Tag Team title aspirations, but tonight they’ll be showcasing their talents individually.

Kavovit: Also, Marcus Bagwell will be making his first appearance since getting kicked out of Sports Entertainment Xtreme last week, as he’ll be taking on Piloto Suicida. Earlier, we got these words from his manager, Steve Corino.

On the video screen, we see Corino getting Suicida hyped up. Corino says this will be his first real match, not that Hardcore stuff that New Jack had him do. Corino tells him don’t make a big deal over Bagwell, and just to do his thing and everything will work out OK.

OR: 85

(Steve Corino gained in over from 76 to 79.)

Snake: Well, certainly Steve Corino is ready for Piloto Suicida’s match, but what shape will Bagwell be in after the brutal beating at the hands of SEX last week?

Kavovit: I don’t know, but it appears right now that Sports Entertainment Xtreme is making their way to the ring. I wonder what this is about.

Vince Russo gets a microphone and joins the rest of his men in the ring.

Russo: Last Sunday, B.G. James and Low-Ki successfully defeated The Hardcore Japanese to win these Tag Team title belts. Also, TAKA Michinoku defeated Ultimo Dragon to keep his X title. You see? I told you that it was a new day for Sports Entertainment Xtreme, but none of your morons believed me! You all thought we were a joke, but we proved you wrong! Hey, don’t boo me for telling the truth. Also, we would have had the Hardcore title too, if Marcus Bagwell hadn’t screwed up. Speaking of screwing up, one member of SEX did just that last week. The only reason TAKA Michinoku even had to defend his X title at Nonstop Summer was because you messed up, Sonny Siaki! If you had beaten Ultimo Dragon, TAKA would have never had to defend his title! As you know, we don’t tolerate losers around here any more. So, Sonny, you are out of …

Low-Ki: Now hold on, Vince. We all know what happened last week. The only reason Sonny lost that match was because you screwed up! That’s right, you hit Sonny with the bell. Sonny was in control of that match until you messed up and knocked him out. Like you said, Vince, we won’t tolerate any more screw-ups. So, Vince, YOU are out of …

Russo: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait a minute, Low-Ki. I wasn’t going to kick Sonny out of SEX for losing a match! Hell, everyone loses a match eventually. Remember, the whole reason you were gone for four months was because you got pinned by Jeff Jarrett back in February. If we kicked out everyone just for losing a match, before long there wouldn’t be any SEX!

Low-Ki: But you said that Sonny was out of …

Russo: Out of the X-division! For as long as TAKA is the X champion, if Sonny isn’t competing in the X division, then Foley can’t use him to set up X title matches like he did last week, that’s all I’m saying!

Russo hugs Siaki, who slowly returns the hug. Russo then leads SEX back to the locker room.

OR: 100

(Vince Russo gained in over from 89 to 93.)

Haas of Pain comes to the ring with microphones. They tell the crowd that they should be cheering for them, which of course elicits some boos. Crash Holly tells us that he’s going to beat Norman Smiley later on. Charlie Haas says he’s going to beat Chris Chetti right now.

OR: 74

Chris Chetti vs. Charlie Haas (with Crash Holly): As usual, the crowd isn’t in to Haas’ mat wrestling display. However, Chetti gets control, and the pace picks up. It’s almost like a X-division match, but it’s not as good as the usual X-division match. The match comes to a surprising finish, as Haas rolls up Chetti, but he has a handful of tights! The referee doesn’t see this and counts the pin. Holly and Haas quickly leave the ring.

Winner: Charlie Haas

OR: 68

CR: 58

MQ: 78

The camera crew catches up with Norman Smiley backstage. He says that Crash Holly is just a little midget wanna-be wrestler who will never be successful as Smiley has been. Smiley promises a Big Wiggle after the win tonight.

OR: 69

Piloto Suicida (with Steve Corino) vs. Marcus Bagwell: Bagwell controls early, surprisingly enough. The fans could care less; no surprise there. Bagwell keeps looking back to his corner, but there’s no one there. Corino keeps telling Suicida not to get caught up in Bagwell’s brawling-style match and to wrestle his own match. Suicida finally reverses one of Bagwell’s moves, and Corino tells him to pick up the pace. Suicida starts pulling out those X-division moves we’ve seen on his videos, and the crowd is mildly impressed. He gets Bagwell down and once again climbs to the top rope. Quebrada! The referee counts the pin, scoring a major upset for Suicida.

Winner: Piloto Suicida

OR: 68

CR: 57

MQ: 79

(Marcus Bagwell dropped in over from 78 to 77.)

Backstage, Konnan stops a camera crew. Arriba la raza! Tonight he’s going to kick Sting’s ass barrio-style. Um, OK, whatever that means.

OR: 74

Meanwhile, Sting tells us that it’s a good thing for Konnan that Vince Russo changed the rules for SEX earlier tonight. If he hadn’t, Konnan would have been kicked out of SEX after Sting beats him tonight.

OR: 97

(Sting gained in over from 95 to 99.)

Norman Smiley vs. Crash Holly (with Charlie Haas): Another fine display of technical wrestling goes unappreciated by the fans at the TNA Asylum. But this match wasn’t as good as we were anticipating. Holly controls for most of the match, but finally Smiley gets control. However, instead of pursuing the advantage, he plays to the crowd and does the Big Wiggle. By the time he’s ready to continue the match, Holly has recovered. Smiley turns around, and walks right into a Crash Landing. The referee counts the easy pinfall.

Winner: Crash Holly

OR: 71

CR: 65

MQ: 78

Sting vs. Konnan (with Vince Russo): The crowd pops for this match. I guess it’s a good thing Sting doesn’t wrestle a technical-style match anymore. Russo distracts Sting, and Konnan gets the advantage. But Sting fights back, and locks in the Scorpion Death Lock. Konnan submits, as Russo looks disappointed.

Winner: Sting

OR: 83

CR: 87

MQ: 75

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 10020

Best segment: SEX almost kicks out Siaki, Russo (100)

Worst segment: (tie) Charlie Haas over Chris Chetti; Piloto Suicida over Marcus Bagwell (68)

Best match: Sting over Konnan (83)