World Championship Wrestling - 2001

[TheBusinessman]

This is interesting.... I eager to see where the Funk thing leads to and I'm glad you didn't have the cruisers going over the big guys at the PPV

[MalaCloudy Black]

Looking..um..slightly better by WCW 2001 standards, ADGray. Keep up the..uh..slightly better work?

EDIT because you wanted it: Rip the meat from a virgin's cunt. Are you happy? I included the "virgin's cunt" thing like we discussed on MSN. B)

Edited August 9, 2004 by Chemical Imbalance

[ADG]

WCW MONDAY NITRO

WCW Monday Nitro comes at you live on TNT from the American Wrest Arena in Phoenix, Arizona! We’re hotting up in the desert tonight and now it’s time to join our hosts for the evening who no doubt are feeling the heat, Tony Schiavone and Gary Michael Cappetta!

- ZBYSKO TAKES HIS SEAT -

Before the opening credits roll we are taken to a skybox here in the American Wrest Arena. There is an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne and a big reclining chair looking down on the ring. The camera zooms back to reveal Larry Zbysko……

Larry Zbysko: Perfect………

And the credits roll………………..

(70)

- CONCLUSIVE PROOF THAT CANADA ROCKS -

The Cat vs. MI Smooth vs. Brian Knobbs vs. Mike Awesome

“Welcome to Nitro! Welcome to WCW!” proclaims Tony Schiavone as he greets us all to another

edition of WCW Nitro, kicking off with an “Impress The Pres” four way match. The Cat is the first man out again minus mommy. He’s followed by Brian Knobbs – DILDO SALESMAN~! (I’ll do it every time…..) – we also get MI Smooth and finally Mike Awesome. Interestingly MI Smooth seems to have become That Eighty’s Guy Mark II as he’s now slapping hands and chanting on his way to the ring. This isn’t the 80’s though Smooth, Old School faces don’t get over any more.

We followed one fall to a finish rules which also means no DQ and no count out, which was just a way of adding some chock socky mayhem to the match so that Smooth and Knobbs could bring their very own brand of senseless violence and weaponry (Well, no Conservatory match tonight). Awesome ran rough shod over all the others though, first destroying The Cat, then beating the hell out of MI Smooth before rounding it all off with the calculated mauling of Brian Knobbs. Awesome was indeed awesome as he was the one bright spark in this match, standing out from the other three men. The Cat did get in some offence but stopped to dance and got his head taken off (not literally unfortunately) by a huge clothesline from Awesome. Just to add to the message that Awesome was awesome, the Team Canada man nailed an Awesome Bomb to The Cat, then slammed Knobbs on top and then dropped Smooth on top of Knobbs and pinned all three men for the victory. Even after the bell the attack wasn’t finished as Knobbs took to the air over the top rope and MI Smooth got an Awesome Bomb for his troubles as we go to commercial.

Awesome looked great (not wanting to use “awesome” again) but The Cat, Knobbs and Smooth were shockingly bad. ½* for Awesome’s performance. Simply awesome…………………….doh!

(57/59/58)

MI Smooth debuted his new gimmick (Old School Face), it got a negative response.

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- AIN’T NOBODY BETTA THAN KANYON -

Chris Kanyon vs. Wayne DeBruce vs. David Flair vs. Norman Smiley

We roll along tonight with the second “Impress The Pres” match of the evening. Coming back from commercial Wayne DeBruce and David Flair are already in the ring, with Norman Smiley on the outside. The fourth competitor getting a full TV entrance is Chris Kanyon. Obviously WCW don’t think there’s anyone better than Kanyon…….

Obviously not as Kanyon comes through this match looking very strong as he dominates whichever of the three unlucky sods he happens to be paired against when he wrestled. Kanyon did strike an alliance with Flair for a while and the two managed to keep both DeBruce and Smiley down, but when Flair tried a double cross Kanyon out smarted him and left Flair to be beaten up by both DeBruce and Smiley as Kanyon watched. When though it looked like Smiley would get the pinfall win DeBruce stopped it and we got DeBruce and Smiley going at it, again as Kanyon watched and laughed. This rolled along quite happily with Kanyon spreading animosity that kept him out of the fighting giving him a lot of time to point at his head and tell us all how clever he is. But of course good must at least put up some resistance to evil and soon Flair, Smiley and DeBruce all went after Kanyon but Kanyon came through it, nailed an I’m Betta Than You to DeBruce, avoided a dropkick from Smiley which sent Flair over the top to the floor and then hooked Smiley with the Northern Lights Suplex for the 1-2-3. Kanyon demands a microphone from ringside after the bell.

WCW are putting over the right people in these matches at least. ¾* for being marginally better than the opener.

(62/65/63)

- KANYON’S ON HIS WAY TO THE TOP! –

The ring attendant hands the victorious Chris Kanyon a microphone. He taps it to make sure it’s on, looks up to the skybox of Larry Zbysko, then begins to speak.

Chris Kanyon: Larry Zbysko, a true wrestling legend. I know you were impressed by that match. Now you’ve got the power to be impressed a whole lot more. All you have to do, is put me in that Time Crisis match and I’ll win it. After all, who betta than Kanyon?

We get a split screen showing Kanyon in the ring and Larry Zbysko in his skybox.

Chris Kanyon: The answer President Zbysko is……………………………no one!

We head to commercial with Kanyon leaving the ring…….

(75)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- CHAVO’S HAREM HANG OUT –

We come back from the commercial to a close up shot of the WCW Cruiserweight Championship. We zoom out to the full torso of Chavo Guerrero Jr. in street clothes and then zoom out even more to show O.G Ekmo and Kimo on opposite sides of him.

Chavo Guerrero Jr: Hey holmes, here’s a little something for all your hard work over the last few weeks.

Chavo reaches into his back pocket and pulls out two small envelopes.

Chavo Guerrero Jr: Enjoy it essé. Oh and maybe that will encourage you to do something for me tonight too holmes………..

Unfortunately we can’t stay with this riveting conversation. We have a match to get to.

(63)

Kimo gained overness from this segment.

- SIZE DOES MATTER, BUT HEART MATTERS MORE -

Rey Misterio Jr. vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Heading to the ring was Bam Bam Bigelow as Schiavone and Cappetta recapped the goings on between Misterio and Guerrero and wonder whether SOS or Guerrero will get involved in this match here tonight. Rey Misterio comes out to a huge pop and the match was on.

Unless the outline for this match read “Punch, punch, punch, headbutt, body slam. Repeat till crowd is bored” then this match was a complete disaster. I don’t know what the plan was, but it certainly couldn’t have been what we saw. Bam Bam and Misterio aren’t exactly matching styles but this could have easily turned into a great underdog vs. monster match with Misterio’s ability and Bigelow’s knowledge, instead we got a slow, plodding affair which was on the whole uninspiring. What WCW needs to realise is there is a difference between two guys putting on a textbook match and two people putting on a good match. This Misterio/Bigelow matchbox came straight from the textbook with all the moves done done well. But there wasn’t anything here to really pull the fans in, and even though they did respond, they could have been worked so much more. After 9 minutes of mostly Bigelow offence Misterio got the opening and took it, nailing a Missile Dropkick and then a Blockbuster Neckbreaker from the top rope for the 1-2-3 win. After the bell S.O.S charged the ring with steel chairs but a Con-Chair-Toe was ducked by Misterio and with S.O.S reeling from the clatter of steel on steel, Misterio nailed a split legged kick to both chairs, sending Ekmo and Kimo to the mat.

Nothing spectacular, but nothing wrong with it either. This is what would be referred to as “perfectly acceptable wrestling”. **

(75/70/72)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- THE FUNKER ON SUPERBRAWL -

Back from commercial and we’re with Terry Funk backstage with “Mean” Gene Okerlund. The Funker has the night off from in ring competition while the Conservatory is repaired and strengthened.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Hello there WCW fans, I hope you’re enjoying Nitro as much as I am, and right now I’m backstage with a man who I have had the privilege of interviewing numerous times over the past few weeks, the WCW Hardcore Champion Terry Funk. Now Funker, I know you’re growing impatient…..

Terry Funk: That’s right “Mean” Gene. I’m not a patient person, I never have been and I never will be. Now this man thinks he can get under my skin with his threats and his talk but there is only one place where you can prove yourself to Terry Funk, and that is in that wrestling ring. Ric Flair proved himself in that ring, Ricky Steamboat proved himself in that ring, Arn Anderson proved himself in that ring, Abdullah The Butcher, Jimmy Snuka, Tully Blanchard, Rocky Johnson, Killer Kowalski, Wahoo McDaniel….they all proved themselves in the squared circle. I gave you the chance to prove yourself to me at Sin and you chose to send that punk David Flair as your little lackey. Well I’m giving you another shot to prove yourself. You see, Superbrawl Revenge takes place, Sunday the 11th of February. How about on that night, you appear and we work out whatever problems we may have, face to face…………………….like men?

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Well said there by Terry Funk and…..oh, hang on a second, I believe we’ve…..have we? Yes we do, uh Terry Funk, I believe we have a response from……well, from the culprit. Can we……..can we roll it?

Okerlund points to a screen off camera as the screen fades into the video response.

Man: Terry Funk………….Terry Funk……..The Funkster! The wrestling legend. NWA World Champion, the toughest son of a bitch in the history of wrestling maybe. But that’s history for ya Terry. It deals with the past. You’re the past you wrinkled S.O.B. I’m the future. The future of this business. I see you step into the ring and you stink up that squared circle and I see your back going every time you get hit, and the grimacing you do just walking down the aisle, and it makes me angry. I’m the future of this industry, but as long as you’re still breathing Terry, people will concentrate on the past, instead of the future. For the future to come through and be recognised the past has to be crushed. That begins with you Funk!

The video fades out and into the next scene…….

(66)

- COULD HE ACTUALLY DO IT? -

We change location entering the Magnificent Seven locker-room. Scott Steiner is pacing up and down the middle of the room. Along one wall sit Road Warrior Animal and Rick Steiner. Opposite them are Bagwell, Flair and Jarrett. Lex Luger is behind them getting ready for his match tonight.

Scott Steiner: Lex, tonight you better win. I swear to God we need to stop Goldberg now. My World Title is in danger, and you two……

Steiner turns aggressively to Animal and his brother.

Scott Steiner: You two failed me! Tonight the Magnificent Seven needs to stand strong and Lex that means beating Goldberg. I don’t care how, just win. If he beats you, and Buff, Jeff and Ric, the M7 is screwed at Superbrawl.

Lex Luger: Hey no problem champ. Goldberg is as good as toast.

Ric Flair: Where are the girls? I haven’t seen any all day….

Could the appeal of the Magnificent Seven among the female population be dwindling? That’s the question every viewer is thinking as we head back to the ring.

(99)

Jeff Jarrett gained overness from this segment.

- “THE FRANCHISE” IS ON A ROLL HEADING TO SUPERBRAWL -

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas vs. Big Vito

We’re firmly into the second hour of the evening with three matches still to run and the first of them saw “The Franchise” Shane Douglas square off with Big Vito. Vito has put in a couple of stellar performances this year and Douglas just rocks your socks.

Shame this match couldn’t do the same. Don’t get me wrong, the work was solid but it suffered from “Misterio-Bigelow Syndrome” in that both men were just going through the motions again with no improvisation to go along with the crowd. This saw a couple of cringe-worthy moments when the crowd was chanting “VITO” really quite loudly and yet Vito wasn’t trying to fight the chin lock he was held in. I don’t know why as I would have thought Douglas would have encouraged the fight but in any case they stuck to their plans, which saw Douglas emerge victorious with the Franchiser for the 1-2-3 after 6 minutes. After the bell we got a staredown between Douglas and Rection which eventually went nowhere interesting as Rection simply applauded the victorious Douglas and then left.

Average match between two average workers with an average crowd. It deserves an average rating. *¼ .

(65/66/65)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- KRONIK SHORTAGE OF TALENT IN TAG TEAM ENCOUNTER -

KroniK vs. The Rhodes

Before the main event it is tradition in wrestling to either hype it up with a promo or to get the crowd really excited with a good match. In WCW this tradition suffered a mistake in the translation. Instead of “send reinforcements we’re going to advance”, WCW received “send three and four pence we’re going to a dance”. Which is why we were treated to KroniK facing Dusty and Dustin Rhodes as the warm up to the main event.

Still with the main event being Goldberg vs. Luger I suppose we should be quite grateful that WCW are at least putting this before it to make Berg/Luger as short as possible, on the downside however that meant these guys had to go for a decent length of time, which just wasn’t possible. So we got a punch-kick affair with Dustin at times trying to salvage the match and failing due to the uselessness of Adams and Clarke. Dusty did get a nice nostalgia pop for the elbows but apart from that the crowd was just their usual selves for a match like this. Happy there is wrestling but sad because it sucks. In the end KroniK got the win with Bryan Clarke pinning Dusty Rhodes after a Powerslam for the 1-2-3. Poor Dusty was too tired to kick out.

*¼ and be happy.

(65/74/71)

Bryan Clarke gained overness from this match. Brian Adams gained overness from this match.

- AND YET THEY WONDER WHY PEOPLE AREN’T WATCHING……. -

Goldberg vs. Lex Luger

We wrap this explosive night up with our main event as Goldberg – continuing his quest against the Magnificent Seven – faces the next member in line, that of “The Total Package” Lex Luger. Luger looks to be stoned, he really looks out of it on his way to the ring.

Let’s try and get this over with as quickly as possible. This match is the exact reason why WCW is failing. When your main event features two of the most sluggish and useless workers in the world this is the result. A poor, uninspired no selling contest to see which of the two would no sell the biggest move. Granted for Goldberg he isn’t really meant to sell much right now as he tears through the Magnificent Seven – “his leg is still giving him some problems” says Schiavone - but Luger should have been bumping his ass off here. However instead whatever narcotic substance Luger took before the match messed up his brain and he no sold everything, including a Powerslam he popped right back up from and a spear he didn’t even take properly, instead holding his ground and staying on his feet. (No easy feat for a drugged up man getting hit with a football tackle by Goldberg) As the frustration grew within Goldberg, Schiavone and Cappetta tried their best to cover for the obvious break of script going on in the ring. As the anger grew and the veins popped out of the neck Luger was still seemingly oblivious to what he doing and more than anything else seemed confused when Goldberg first nailed a Jackhammer and then a second Spear for the 1-2-3 with a faster than usual count and we’re off the air.

Yuck. DUD. Honestly WCW, if this is the best you can do with a main event I’d hate to see your worst.

(32/70/58)

Lex Luger basically no-sold everything, which ruined the match.

Overall Show Rating: 68%

We got a 5.04 rating for 'Nitro'!

The attendance level was 5563 people.

We made $139075 from ticket sales.

WWF got a 6.90 television rating for 'RAW'!

The event was attended by 7501 people.

They made $300040 from ticket sales.

[MalaCloudy Black]

Yuck main event. Kronik/Rhodes didn't seem that bad..and I'm happy Mysterio pulled out the win.

And you're slowly catching up to RAW (Y)

[ADG]

WCW THUNDER PREVIEW

The road to Superbrawl continues and make sure you tune in tonight on TBS to see our explosive main event as Goldberg continues his fight against the Magnificent Seven as he faces Buff Bagwell in one on one competition! Already Rick Steiner, Road Warrior Animal and Lex Luger have been banned from ringside for Superbrawl. Will Bagwell join them? Tune in to find out!

On Nitro KroniK and “The Franchise” Shane Douglas came out of their matches with victories. Tonight it is the turn of the champions as The InSiders face The Harris Boys and General Rection goes one on one with Chris Candido!

Chris Kanyon and Mike Awesome impressed on Nitro emerging victorious in their matches. Tonight both want to solidify their place in the “Time Crisis” match as Kanyon takes on The Cat and Awesome squares off with Sergeant A-WALL.

Also tonight Rey Misterio will be watching closely as O.G Ekmo goes one on one with Wayne DeBruce!

Before going to press today the Natural Born Thrillers contacted us and told us they had an announcement to make tonight. What will it be? What kind of impact will it have on the NBT?

- Confirmed Matches -

Goldberg vs. Buff Bagwell

The InSiders vs. The Harris Boys

General Rection vs. Chris Candido

The Cat vs. Chris Kanyon

Mike Awesome vs. Sergeant A-WALL

O.G Ekmo vs. Wayne DeBruce

Edited August 13, 2004 by ADGray

[Guest UmpireAJS]

Well on a positive side, the Main Event wasn't SID VS LEX LUGER! Think about the ratings then. About Thunder, most of the matches look *1/2 material to me.Awesome,Kanyon are all stuck with hopeless opponents. Insiders vs Harris um.. may be a 1/2*, but seriously Candido and Rection is going to suck inside and outside the ring. But Hey! What I am complaining of? It's WCW 2001!!!

[ClaRK! Kent]

Damn right it is. AD is doing pretty well, actually, given the utter drivel he has to work with, and he's doing it whilst being realistic and not simply going down the indy list "Amazing Red, Chris Daniels, Loki, Michael Shane, Spanky, Ted Hart... all signed!" like so many inferior writers. Keep it up, my man.

RK!

[Pesci]

BOO at managing to get rid of Goldberg's creative clause... This is WCW 2001, not Jesus Christ Miracle Worker Wrestling. Work wit' you damn issues, boy.

BOO at jobbing Bam Bam to Mysterio. Push Bam Bam or die.

But a good old hearty YAY at just about everything else. I hope the Time Crisis match isn't falls count anywhere, that would suit a minor league wrestling promotion's hardcore title more than a global-sized industry's number one contendership to it's most pretigious prize. We need class!

PLEASE make Funk's stalker somebody interesting. Put A-WALL over Awesome. That is all.

Edited August 16, 2004 by Burning Dragon

[ClaRK! Kent]

The Funk stalker needs to be Sean O'Haire - stat! Looking forward to seeing the continuation of this, ADGray, it's been days now!

RK!

[ADG]

WCW THUNDER!

WCW Thunder comes at you from the Lawlor Events Center in Reno, Nevada! Why couldn’t we stay in Vegas? Home of the Showgirls…….Your commentators for this evening are Mike Tenay and Gary Michael Cappetta.

- EKMO CRUSHES OPPOSITION -

O.G Ekmo vs. Wayne DeBruce

Tony Schiavone is mega polite as he welcomes us to Thunder and points out the presence of Wayne DeBruce in the ring. Poor guy doesn’t even get an entrance for the TV audience. His opponent for tonight is the wonderful O.G Ekmo accompanied as always by his tag partner Kimo and Chavo Guerrero Jr. – the man who pays for his services.

Is this Thunder – home of competitive wrestling – or Worldwide – home of squashes galore? I’ll give it to DeBruce, he’s playing his new old school face gimmick to the full, even getting crushed by the monster heel in little over 90 seconds of a squash, harking back to the days of the early 90’s. Ekmo at least did look good the whole 90 seconds with his repertoire consisting of a Powerslam, a Spinebuster, an avalanche in the corner and then a Sky High for the 1-2-3 win.

I mark for the old school squash feel. ½*

(70/47/58)

O.G. Ekmo gained overness from this match.

- CHAVO’S ON HYPE DUTY! –

The WCW Cruiserweight Champion Chavo Guerrero Jr. gets into the ring along with Kimo. Chavo has a microphone in his hand.

Chavo Guerrero Jr: Hahahaha, you see that Misterio essé? Every week I come out here with these guys, and every week they destroy the opposition. That was just O.G holmes, and it took him a minute and a half to win. Think about it Rey. 90 divided by two essé. You’ll be toast in 45 seconds holmes. 45 seconds and you’ll have lost. You’ve got eighteen days till Superbrawl Misterio. That’s still a lotta time to get out the country holmes, head for the hills Misterio, because you stay, and you’ll suffer the same as that loser right there.

Chavo drops the microphone and the three men leave to Chavo’s music as we head to Mike and Cappetta who discuss the relationship between Guerrero and Straight Outta Samoa. Yes, you read it right, they actually discussed the cruiserweight scene.

(74)

Chavo Guerrero Jr. gained overness from this segment.

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- OOOOHH CANADA, OUR HOME AND NATIVE LAND….. -

Coming back from commercial and Team Canada are in the ring, minus Jim Duggan. Mike Awesome and Elix Skipper are waving Canadian flags as Lance Storm takes a microphone from ringside.

Lance Storm: If I could be serious for a minute, it would be greatly appreciated if you would all rise out of respect for the Canadian national anthem.

There is some booing and then an orchestral accompaniment starts to play over the PA system and the booing intensifies. Awesome and Skipper stand close to Storm in the middle and the three use the one microphone to sing.

Team Canada: Oh Canada,

Our home and native land,

True patriot love in all thy sons command

With glowing hearts we see thee rise

The True North strong and……

Before they can continue the orchestra has been interrupted by the music of the MIA and Major Gunns, Corporal Cajun and Mike Awesome’s opponent tonight, Sergeant A-WALL are charging the ring. Storm and Skipper bail out leaving Awesome to dispose of A-WALL.

(79)

- A MEETING OF MINDS -

Mike Awesome vs. Sergeant A-WALL

We roll on tonight with the following contest as Team Canada and The Misfits In Action again meet in the squared circle, this time the lucky participants being Mike Awesome accompanied to the ring by Lance Storm & Elix Skipper and Sergeant A-WALL who is seconded by Corporal Cajun & Major Gunns.

But I’m confused, is this a mini feud we’re seeing between the MIA and Team Canada or is it just that WCW doesn’t have a very big roster at the moment and they’re just putting people together for any old reason? I’m not sure but the way Mike Tenay is putting it over on commentary you’d think that the two factions were engaged in the bloodiest, most violent feud of all time. At least the

two in the ring tried to back up Tenay’s words. A-WALL turned in his best performance in a long time and Mike Awesome looked even better than he did on Monday night. Awesome really needs to be pushed hard. He’s one of a number of great midcarders who could take WCW back to the top if given the chance. A-WALL though isn’t the kind of guy to go anywhere higher than the midcard unless he gets a new gimmick, a heel turn and a monster push which is shoved down our throats to Triple H levels. With both men looking impressive and at the top of their games it was only natural we get a nice finish and we got one with Awesome nailing a Top Rope Awesome Bomb to A-WALL for the 1-2-3. To finish we got the customary brawl between the factions with Team Canada’s 3 on 2 advantage coming into play and The MIA were left sprawled out on the canvas.

Push Awesome now. *¾

(70/60/65)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- ATTENTION! CANDIDO! YOU ARE A WORTHLESS PILE OF DONKEY CRAP! -

General Rection vs. Chris Candido

Well Sergeant A-WALL couldn’t score a win for the MIA tonight, but perhaps the jewel in the crown of the MIA, General Rection can as he faces off against Chris Candido, who is accompanied by Tammy Sytch. I still have a soft spot in my heart for her.

With no cruiserweight match tonight this match just managed to earn the prize for Match of the Night from under the noses of the opener and Awesome vs. A-WALL. While most had expected this match to be a mess inside and outside the ring, Rection and Candido communicated well and worked to the strengths of each other. The experience of Candido helped a lot as well as the two put together a match that wasn’t spectacular in any way but nevertheless was entertaining enough to keep you interested. Candido was in control for most of it thanks to constant interference from Tammy Sytch, but the odds were evened when Major Gunns came out from the back. This led to Rection managing to fight back and get the advantage, Tammy tried to interfere and we got a cat-fight going at ringside which the crowd popped for. With confusion reigning and the referee and Candido trying to pull Sytch and Gunn apart, “The Franchise” Shane Douglas took the opportunity to run from the back and lay General Rection out with a pair of brass knuckles. Candido turned completely by luck obviously, spotted Rection out for the count and made the cover for the 1-2-3.

Good enough for *¾

(71/61/66)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- THE CAT FALLS INTO THE KANYON -

“The Cat” Ernest Miller vs. Chris Kanyon

Now we’re treated to “red hot one on one action, as can only be seen here on WCW Thunder”. I call it “timid wrestling as a talented worker (Chris Kanyon) who should be higher up the card trying to drag something watchable out of a man who shouldn’t ever be in a wrestling ring. (The Cat)

Timid isn’t the word to describe this match. Timid is paying the match a compliment as Kanyon tried desperately to pull something decent out of The Cat who just seemed bored with what he was doing, poorly selling a huge spin kick from Kanyon and a neck-breaker which Kanyon sold more than Miller. Even when Kanyon gave Miller the reigns to take the match where he wanted it to go The Cat kept everything as it was, slow paced and lifeless. On commentary Tenay and Cappetta tried to cover for the obvious lack of creativity going on in the ring but it proved difficult to come up with a credible reason. Eventually the two did peak the crowds interest near the end when The Cat finally realised he was in a wrestling ring and started to unload with some stiff kicks to the head of Kanyon and Kanyon sold them perfectly. In the end The Cat “went to the well once to often”, when he looked for another solid kick but this time had his leg caught by Kanyon, who swept The Cat to the mat and rolled through into a Bridge Pin for the 1-2-3 out of nowhere.

Kanyon tried hard but The Cat only remembered his job description near the end and put some effort in. *¼.

(64/73/70)

- KANYON WANTS THE WORLD TITLE -

As Kanyon is heading up the aisle after his victory he is met by “Mean” Gene Okerlund in the aisle. Kanyon tries to brush him off but “Mean” Gene is plucky and keeps at him nagging until eventually Kanyon turns round to confront Okerlund.

Chris Kanyon: What is it you want? Besides a full head of hair!

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: I and all the WCW fans just wanted to know what your next step is. Tonight you’ve scored a huge victory of The Cat, where do you go from here?

Chris Kanyon: Where do I go from here? I go onwards and upwards “Mean” Gene. On Monday night I beat three men, tonight I beat The Cat 1-2-3 in that ring. Next Monday no doubt I’ll be wrestling again, and why shouldn’t I be? Larry Zbysko makes the matches and he obviously knows talent when he sees it. I will be the Time Crisis match one way or another, and I will walk out of Superbrawl Revenge the number one contender to the WCW World Heavyweight Championship. The Time Crisis match is a quick way to make a statement, a way to make a name for yourself in one night, and I intend to take that chance! Who betta than Kanyon? The answer “Mean” Gene, as always…………..is no one.

And we head to a commercial. Eat at McDonalds!

(69)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- THE NBT GOT SOMETHING TO SAY! OH NO, POOR STASIAK….. -

Coming back from commercial and the music of the Natural Born Thrillers hits the PA system. Out come Reno, Johnny The Bull – looking very focused -, Sean O’Haire, Chuck Palumbo and Mark Jindrak. They’re led to the ring by the uber-charismatic Mike Sanders. Strangely absent from the group is Shawn Stasiak. The six get into the ring and Mike Sanders accepts the offer of a microphone from a ring technician.

Mike Sanders: Yeah, first time you’ve seen us for a long time huh? Yeah well I’m not out here to run my mouth at people in the back. You see, the NBT have got some news to tell you all, and we all know that you’ll be heartbroken when we tell ya. You probably noticed that our buddy Shawn Stasiak, he isn’t here tonight. Well, he won’t be here for a long time……

The crowd cheers at this. I have a feeling the TV audience is joining in as well. I know I am. No Stasiak for a long time? That’s music to my eyes. Watch the ratings spiral upwards out of control now.

Mike Sanders: Yeah, you see Shawn, he was in the gym lifting weights and he was really stupid and lifted too much and it came down on him and his neck is busted up. So you can pretty much bet your house on him not being back. The doctor said about eight months.

The crowd cheers before one random off-handed “na na na na” starts a chain reaction building to a 5,500 strong rendition of ‘Na Na Hey Hey’.

Mike Sanders: Yeah you people would like that wouldn’t ya! You’d like someone to lose their livelihood, their job. But the Natural Born Thrillers, we ain’t gonna be put down by this. We’re gonna rise like a phoenix from the ashes and get stronger, the NBT has had a little bad luck, but the Bible says that bad is balanced by good, so we’re gonna get some good luck very soon, and when we get it, we’re gonna shove it down the throats of each and every one of you!

Sanders drops the microphone to the canvas and it makes a small “thud”. The NBT leave the ring to their music as Tenay and Cappetta confirm the Stasiak injury, what exactly is wrong with him and the doctor he saw. “One of the foremost authorities on neck injuries in the country.” Lucky Stasiak.

(82)

Johnny The Bull debuted his new gimmick (Machine), it got a negative response.

- OH DEAR GOD, IT’S McMAHON’S DREAM MATCH -

The InSiders vs. The Harris Boys

We continue on this evening with a match which, had this been the WWF would have received months of hype and been placed as a pay per view main event as The InSiders warmed up for KroniK on February 11th by facing The Harris Boys who have more recently been known as The Jobber Boys. You’ve got three hosses in this match and a guy who can actually wrestle a little. What could be better Vince?

Anything! A trip to the dentists! Having a nine inch rusty nail shoved through your nose! Boiling hot tar poured over your nether regions! Anything would have been better than this match turned out to be as Nash, Don and Ron took part in a contest to determine which of them could most closely resemble a brick wall in a wrestling ring as they punched and kicked away at each other at every opportunity. It wasn’t so much no selling the offence of each other because they were acknowledging they were getting hit, but even the hardest chops and slaps elicited no reaction except from the crowd as Nash, Don and Ron took centre stage leaving DDP on the apron – which I’m pretty sure he was happy about. Eventually we moved on from punching and kicking to shoulder blocks and clotheslines but even then they were sold as “the irresistible force meeting the immovable object”. Only nice part of the match came courtesy of DDP at the end. Both Harris’ looked for a Superplex on DDP but Nash knocked them away. One of the Harris’, Ron I think, stumbled around for a few seconds, found the small “X” marked on the canvas where he had to stand and DDP came off the second rope with a Diamond Cutter variation for the 1-2-3. After the bell KroniK charged the ring and we got a four man brawl between the champs and the challengers as Thunder went to a commercial break!

3 No Talent Hosses + 1 Talented Wrestler + No Selling = ½*

(58/76/69)

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- WHOOOO! I’M BUFF, I’M TOUGH! HOLLA IF YA HEAR ME! -

We come back from commercial with all of the Magnificent Seven surrounding “Mean” Gene Okerlund. With all seven plus Midajah there you really see how small Okerlund is.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: WCW fans hello to you all, I am “Mean” Gene Okerlund backstage here at the Lawlor Events Centre here on the campus of the University of Nevada in beautiful Reno, Nevada, and I am standing with the Magnificent Seven prior to our main event here on Thunder. Tonight Goldberg goes one on one with Buff Bagwell in his quest to ban the Seven from ringside at Superbrawl Revenge for his match against you Scott Steiner…

Scott Steiner: Listen midget, I don’t need anyone’s help to beat that punk Goldberg, but Larry Zbysko, he wants to try to stack the odds against me. He doesn’t like it, that I have the gold around my waist. He can’t take it, that the Big Bad Booty Daddy holds the most prestigious championship in the world today. Now Larry Zbysko can do whatever the hell he likes as far as I’m concerned. The fact is, I have the belt, and neither him or Goldberg will take it from me! I do not need anyone’s help to beat Goldberg, all this little quest is doing, is tiring Goldberg out before Superbrawl.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Well be that as it may, tonight Goldberg goes one on one with you Buff Bagwell. He’s already taken out Rick Steiner, Road Warrior Animal and Lex Luger, and as goes his popular saying, “You’re Next”.

Buff Bagwell: Hahahahahaha, you actually believe that in-bred Atlanta asshole has a chance against Buff Bagwell? He may have got past Rick, Animal and Lex, but that was all luck. Tonight he meets the challenge of the Buff man. I’m not a pushover, and I’ll tell you this “Mean” Gene, at Superbrawl, Rick, Animal and Lex might not be there at ringside………I will be. But after I’m finished with him tonight, Goldberg might not even make it to Superbrawl, because I’m buff, I’m tough and I’m the stuff, and Goldberg, try as you might, tonight you’ll realise you’re just not enough!

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Well if Goldberg does somehow find a way past you tonight Buff Bagwell, the next man in line to take on Goldberg is you Jeff Jarrett.

Jeff Jarrett: And what’s your point slapnuts?

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Well, well what are your thoughts on that?

Jeff Jarrett: Alright slapnuts, firstly I won’t need to face Goldberg because tonight Buff is going to beat him seven ways from Sunday to the point that he won’t even make it to Nitro on Monday to face me. Secondly peon, Goldberg wouldn’t want to make it to Nitro on Monday night to face me and thirdly slapnuts! If Goldberg did show up on Monday Nitro – we all know he isn’t that smart – if he did show up, I would take away his ability to walk.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Well if my memory serves me correctly the Magnificent Seven has already tried to take away Goldberg’s ability to walk at Sin and it didn’t work…

Jeff Jarrett: Listen here slapnuts, at Sin we got half the job done, but these things take time, especially with a freak like Goldberg. Ain’t that right Naitch?

Ric Flair: Whooooooooo, that’s right! Goldberg he is a freak alright, but isn’t a genetic freak, like Scott Steiner! Like Big Poppa Pump! Like…The..Big….Bad…..Booty……Dadday! Tonight Buff beats Goldberg, on Monday night, Jeff beats Goldberg, and one week today, next Wednesday night I beat Goldberg. Goldberg, to be the man ya gotta beat the man, I’m the man and I’ll see you next week, whoooooooooooo. But keep your mind on tonight Goldberg, because Buff Bagwell is comin’ for ya! Whoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Scott Steiner: Let’s go guys…..

The Magnificent Seven walk away, leaving a flustered Gene Okerlund looking straight into the camera, sweat glistening on the top of his bald head.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: Well, the Magnificent Seven making their thoughts clear here tonight. It’s Goldberg versus Buff Bagwell, right after this.

Thunder heads to a commercial break but manages to catch “Mean” Gene patting his head with a handkerchief before we’re told all about the advantages of ‘George Foreman’s Lean Mean Fat Reducin’ Grillin’ Machine’ and asked to not forget to order Superbrawl!

(100)

Ric Flair gained overness from this segment.

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- “IT’S MAIN EVENT TIME HERE ON THUNDER” = TIME TO PHONE THE PIZZA AND TAKE A DUMP -

Goldberg vs. Buff Bagwell

Main event time on Thunder and Goldberg looks to continue his dominance over the Magnificent Seven by swiping aside the next competitor, Buff Bagwell, who was accompanied to the ring by Lex Luger before referee Charles Robinson sent Luger to the back to keep this match fair. They ain’t here to play chess ladies and gents.

Although chess would have been more interesting. Once again we were treated to a clusterfuck of a main event as Bagwell – being the “senior” figure – attempted to puppy walk Goldberg through the match. Unfortunately for Bagwell, Goldberg wasn’t having it and without any warning reversed an Irish Whip into a Belly to Belly Suplex which signalled Berg’s intent not to let Bagwell dictate the match. To his credit Bagwell didn’t fight it and instead allowed Goldberg to unleash every move he’d been taught by DeBruce before Bagwell tried to get in a little offence but Goldberg even no-sold the king of all heel moves, a thumb to the eye before hitting the spear and Jackhammer combination for the 1-2-3. After the bell Goldberg held 4 fingers up in the Horsemen symbol (4 HORSEMEN RETURN~!...........................No) Rather the 4 finger salute was the signify the four of the six that he’d beaten already. Yes, yes Bill, four down and two to go.

It wasn’t pretty, but matches with Goldberg never are. Still you can’t deny he gets the crowd excited and they go home happy. Imagine when he and Jarrett or he and Flair go at it next week. The crowd will be ecstatic. *

(52/74/67)

Overall Show Rating: 72%

We got a 4.74 rating for 'Thunder'!

The attendance level was 5551 people.

We made $138775 from ticket sales.

=====================================================

NOTE TO READERS: Okay, I start college tomorrow. While I'm going to keep writing this updates might be a little slower, although they should be out quicker than this one has been, I've just been really tired this past week but thankfully now a combination of Red Bull, coffee and PEP caffeine tablets is helping me in that regard. Hope you enjoyed Thunder.

=====================================================

[ADG]

The Diary of Andrew Duncan Gray

January 25th 2001

Fuckety Fuck Fuck Fuck

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck”

“Language!”

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!”

“What did you do?”

“I stubbed my fuckin’ toe! It fuckin’ hurt!”

“Stop being such a big baby.”

I was this close to firing Sophie, it bloody hurt! Especially as it was my bad leg, and the jolt went up my leg and tingled in my knee.

“To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?” I asked. Not rudely or anything, but I wasn’t amused and would rather she wouldn’t take up my time if it wasn’t important. I know first impressions shouldn’t count for so much, but I’ve known Sophie three weeks and I don’t like her.

“I brought you in these figures, the NPW results that you asked for and as you requested, the latest Wrestling Observer.”

“Thanks.”

“Why do you want to know the results from NPW? You don’t work for them anymore.”

“No, but there are still friends of mine up there, plus we send our guys there to develop-“

“And as punishment.”

“And that.” I gave her a little wink and a smile, but she seemed repulsed by it.

“Mr. Turner was phoning for you earlier. Well, not himself but his secretary.”

“Ah yes the wonderful Maureen.”

“You know her then?”

“She carries a reputation around here.”

“She has got a stern tongue.”

“According to Ric Flair, that’s not all. 55 years old but the figure of a 20 year old apparently.”

“I didn’t need to know that.”

“Neither did I, but Ric felt obliged to tell me. I’ll leave out the more revealing details.”

“Please do.”

“Is there anything else?”

“Well one thing, I’m your PA………”

“Yes?”

“But I don’t do much around here for you.”

I was searching in my mind for the point behind her question but I couldn’t find it for all my trying. I had to ask her.

“What is the point of this Sophie? I’m a busy man.”

“Well, it’s just I thought a PA was constantly on their toes. Most of the day I’m talking to my sister and friends on the phone.”

Now I should point out that social calls are prohibited in WCW, but it was true what she was saying. Most days I’d ask her for a coffee in the mornings and retire to whichever room was designated my office for the day. I wouldn’t bother her again until around one o’clock when I’d ask her to phone something for lunch, mainly pizza. She’d bring it in, take a couple of slices for herself – “I’m watching my weight so don’t order one for myself” she says – and then she’ll go back to her desk. Around four o’clock I’ll leave my office with a fax to be sent and find her slumped on her desk bored out her skull and I’ll tell her she can leave for the day, and she will. This happens every day. But it isn’t that I don’t like her that I don’t give her much work to do.

“You’re working for free Sophie, I don’t want to ask you to do too much if you’re not taking home a wage at the end of the day.”

“Everything I do is covered by the company anyway. The hotel, the transport, the meals.”

“It’s all covered? How much does this cost the company?”

“Not much, I usually share a room with someone else, usually Carla in production. And it isn’t like we stay at the Ritz, usually it’s the Holiday Inn, the bus and a microwave dinner.”

“Alright, alright. Just thought you paid your own way.”

“Would you prefer me too? With no salary?”

“No, no of course not.”

She was backing me into a corner here. I thought maybe she had a bank account or something, with a lot of money left over from the late 90’s, she does drive a Mercedes after all. I’ve stayed in Holiday Inns before, rode the bus before and eaten microwave dinners, I decided to do something very kind.

“Would you like to join me for dinner?”

“I don’t know.”

“I’m paying, and it isn’t microwave dinners.”

“Erm……”

“Come on, if you’re going to eat a rubbery turkey dinner, you might as well do it at some fancy restaurant.”

“Alright.”

“Excellent, what time is it?”

“Four o’clock.”

“Clocking off time for you. I’ll see you tonight, half past eight at the, oh hell let’s go all out, 8.30pm at the Ritz Hotel.”

“Okay Mr. Gray.”

“Call me Andrew.”

“Mr. Gray will do for now.”

With that she was gone, but I don’t want you thinking I’ve gone soft all of a sudden. In fact part of my mind was planning to go to a very expensive place then run out leaving her with the cheque. Get her out my hair for a day while she’s in jail, but I didn’t don’t worry. I didn’t have time to contemplate it either as no sooner had Sophie popped her head in at about quarter past to say she was leaving before I had another visitor.

“Come in.” I said, and he walked in. “This is an honour, what can I do for you?”

He shut the door and sat down in the chair in front of me and we talked for three hours and before I knew it we’d covered politics, our homeland, America, wrestling, WCW, music, theatre, film and more. But I had to get to the hotel and get changed for dinner, so I finally had to bring up the subject of why he was sitting in front of me.

“I’m retiring at the end of February.”

“Oh…..”

This was a shock, and I knew what he wanted.

“Leave it with me, come and see me on Monday night, I’ll get you a ticket to Nitro and a car to take you to Salt Lake City.”

“Thanks …”

Yikes, it’s late, I’ll have to fill you in on the dinner with Sophie another time.

[ClaRK! Kent]

It isn't Hogan, is it? Or Arn? Aaaaah! Anyhow, tepid Thunder as usual, congratulations, and a good tease to the beginning of something in the way of a relationship with Sophie in the pipeline. Lookin' forward to the continuation.

RK!

[ADG]

WCW MONDAY NITRO PREVIEW

We’re two weeks away from Superbrawl Revenge and tonight Nitro comes at you live from the Delta Center in Salt Lake City! WCW is buzzing with the build-up to Superbrawl! Our main events keep getting bigger and better as tonight Goldberg faces Jeff Jarrett. Is the fatigue starting to set in? Goldberg surely can’t be at 100% after the last 4 matches against The Magnificent Seven.

Also tonight “The Franchise” Shane Douglas will be in action. On Thunder Douglas cost the US Champion General Rection his match against Chris Candido. Tonight will General Rection be looking for revenge as “The Franchise” locks up with the big man Sid?

On Thunder we saw O.G Ekmo in singles competition, tonight it is the turn of Kimo to enter the ring for singles action as he takes on Norman Smiley, and you know Rey Misterio will be watching closely!

We heard on Thunder that Shawn Stasiak is now injured and will be out for the next 8 months. Tonight the Natural Born Thrillers are looking to bounce back as Mark Jindrak and Sean O’Haire take on Air Raid!

Also tonight, Team Canada look to strengthen their chances in the “Time Crisis” match as Lance Storm and Elix Skipper will be in singles action against MI Smooth and Big Vito respectively!

Also tonight on Nitro, Larry Zbysko has promised to name the first 5 WCW Superstars who will enter the “Time Crisis” match.

All this and more only on WCW Nitro!

- Confirmed Matches -

Goldberg vs. Jeff Jarrett

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas vs. Sid

Jindrak & O’Haire vs. Air Raid

Lance Storm vs. MI Smooth

Elix Skipper vs. Big Vito

Kimo vs. Norman Smiley

Edited August 22, 2004 by ADGray

[ADG]

WCW MONDAY NITRO

WCW Monday Nitro comes at you live from the Delta Center in wonderful Salt Lake City, Utah home of the next Winter Olympics! Curling rawks~! And so do your announce team of Tony Schiavone and Gary Michael Cappetta.

- POOR SMILEY -

Kimo vs. Norman Smiley

“We are live from Salt Lake City” screeches Tony Schiavone to kick us off this Monday night. Norman Smiley gets a brief mention as he is already in the ring but most of the hype is for Kimo accompanied to the ring by O.G Ekmo and Chavo Guerrero Jr.

A second squash in a row for Straight Outta Samoa as Kimo utterly dominated Norman Smiley for the whole three minutes that this match went. I can’t help but feel sorry for Smiley, one week he’s winning and the fans are cheering, the next he’s getting squashed by a green rookie, it is very mixed signals he must be getting right now. Still Smiley is always the consummate professional and he did his job here, selling for everything Kimo did, and Kimo did a lot in the three minutes, and it was all good stuff. Stiff punches were followed by lariats, a Fall-away Slam, a Spinebuster and a big splash before Kimo scooped the limp carcass of Smiley up and nailed a Gorilla Press into a Powerslam for the 1-2-3 pinfall victory. Kimo celebrated a little after the match while Schiavone and Cappetta talked about Rey Misterio, but even Misterio wouldn’t take on all three men right now.

O.G Ekmo and Kimo are growing on me, but they’re not over enough for PPV yet. *

(73/59/66)

Winner: Kimo

Norman Smiley lost overness from this match. Kimo gained overness from this match.

- CANADA ROCKS! DON’T YOU FORGET IT! -

Elix Skipper vs. Big Vito

For once we don’t get a Guerrero promo following a match, instead we’re treated to another match as Elix Skipper of Team Canada [accompanied by Mike Awesome faced off with Big Vito.

With this being Skipper’s first match of the year against a man who has been jobbing right, left and centre there wasn’t much doubt who was going to get the victory here from the get-go but the two still tried to make us doubt our instincts as Vito controlled the match throwing the smaller Skipper around like a ragdoll with a variety of moves from his arsenal. Of course it was obvious that Mike Awesome was not going to not get involved and he squared up to Vito on a number of occasions throughout the match allowing his compatriot time to recover and mount an offensive which each time was soon repelled by Vito. Indeed it looked like Vito may actually come out of the match with a victory but Team Canada sticks together and with a great piece of “help me I’m legitimately hurt” acting from Skipper outside the ring, the referee was distracted long enough for Awesome to sneak into the ring and nail a Sit-Out Awesome Bomb. Skipper made a miraculous recovery, climbed to the top rope and nailed a leg-drop off the top which Schiavone called the Niagra Falls for the 1-2-3! After the bell had rung Awesome nailed a second Awesome Bomb just for the hell of it.

Another solid match, Nitro is looking good so far. I wouldn’t be surprised to see them equaling RAW in the breakdown for this first 15 minutes, after all it’s been a Stephanie McMahon promo on the other side. *¼

(75/57/66)

Winner: Elix Skipper

Elix Skipper gained overness from this match.

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- “THE FRANCHISE” SAYS “BUSES ARE FOR LOSERS!” -

We come back from commercial to the parking lot of the Delta Center, which really makes for riveting viewing. As if by magic we get something happening as the roar of an engine heralds the arrival of a motorbike, a beautiful red shiny beast, complete with flames down the sides. The rider removes his helmet to show “The Franchise” Shane Douglas. An arena attendant approaches……

Attendant: Good evening Mr. Douglas sir.

Douglas gets off the bike and hands the attendant a $20 bill.

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas: You take good care of this baby alright? It’s expensive. You know how much this cost me?

Attendant: No sir.

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas: $50,000, so take good care of it.

Attendant: Yes sir.

“The Franchise” enters the building as we head back to ringside.

(74)

- IF I COULD BE SERIOUS FOR A MINUTE…………STORM > YOU! -

Lance Storm vs. MI Smooth

We come back to ringside and the next match on what so far has been an above average Nitro, but the presence of MI Smooth in this next match may drag it down and tonight he’s facing Lance Storm. Could the Canadian save this match from DUDsville?

No. Sometimes I wish that “No” could be my whole write-up of a match because it is thoroughly unpleasant recapping matches which are just painful. Case in point, Storm vs. Smooth. A horribly constructed match with MI Smooth no selling every move that Storm busted out of the vault from punches to suplexes and neckbreakers for almost the entire duration of the match, which meant Storm had to go right back to his dungeon training and make Smooth scream like a baby with a variety of submission holds including a Half Boston Crab, a Sharpshooter and a Fujiwara Armbar before Storm scored the submission win with the Canadian Maple Leaf after about 9 minutes. Following the match MI Smooth took a long time to vacate the ring and after the ring was empty we headed to commercial.

Ouch, sorry WCW, you were doing really well tonight but this is a DUD. Simple as that.

(45/60/57)

Winner: Lance Storm

MI Smooth didn't really sell very much, which hurt the match rating.

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- IT’S SPELLED J-A-HAHA-DOUBLE R-HAHA-E-DOUBLE T-HAHA! -

We return from a rather charming commercial for diarrhea tablets to the orange sunglasses of Jeff Jarrett and the bald head of “Mean” Gene Okerlund. WCW really needs another backstage interviewer. Anyway, we’re getting comments from Jarrett it looks like.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund: February 11th 2001 is Goldberg’s date with destiny, at SuperBrawl Revenge, Goldberg goes one on one with Scott Steiner. Tonight he faces “The Chosen One” Jeff Jarrett in an attempt to ban Jarrett from ringside at Superbrawl, and Jeff Jarrett is with me now.

Jeff Jarrett: You’re damn right I’m with you right now slapnuts, although I’m going to make this quick because you smell like *beep*. Goldberg listen to me very carefully, I’ll make it easy for you to understand. I’ll use small words and speak slowly. Tonight Goldnuts you step into the ring with “The Chosen” One Jeff Jarrett. You’re chasing the WCW World Title, you’ve tasted that gold before and you taste it again, but don’t think you’ve got it done, you better be focused one hundred and ten percent on me tonight Goldberg, because if you’re not, I’ll put you in the hospital.

We head to ringside as Jarrett walks off.

(92)

Jeff Jarrett gained overness from this segment.

- FOUR YOUNGSTERS BUST OUT MATCH OF THE YEAR CONTENDER -

Jindrak & O’Haire vs. Air Raid

Back to ringside and we get a match focused around the youth of WCW with Jindrak & O’Haire facing Air Raid. No story involved here, just two teams looking to rise up the tag ranks.

Nitro gets back on track with a superb match which spanned a commercial break as Jindrak, O’Haire, Paris and Styles showed us what we all have to look forward to in the coming years if WCW survives its current crisis. All four brought their “A” games for this one and with a little teaching in psychology these four could really bring the goods to the table. As it was, while the match was so fast and frantic for the opening 15 minutes – with the teams splitting the offence 50/50 - that it was impossible not to be engrossed, the closing minutes lacked focus and there was a visible moment when the four shut off and went into a pre-arranged ending for the match. Still the first 15 minutes were beautifully done with Air Paris and AJ Styles really excelling in their bumping as they made Jindrak & O’Haire look like two of the world’s strongest men and Jindrak and O’Haire repaid the favour allowing Paris and Styles to bust out all their best moves. So between Powerslams, Fallaway slams, Brainbusters and Belly to Belly suplexes we were treated to moonsaults, headscissors, hurricanranas, dropkicks and more. The ending did let the whole match down though, with it not going to plan. A collision between O’Haire and Jindrak had isolated Jindrak on the top rope, but a Shining Wizard from Paris to Jindrak didn’t connect properly and AJ couldn’t bring Jindrak over in the Northern Lights, instead opting for a Downward Spiral, but Air Paris thought quickly, nailed a Moonsault and that got the 1-2-3 win. Air Raid celebrate as we go to commercial.

Well by normal standards it’s shocking but by WCW standards congratulations are in order. WCW just got it’s second *** of the year.

(85/56/70)

Winners: Air Raid

Mark Jindrak lost overness from this match. AJ Styles gained overness from this match. Air Paris gained overness from this match.

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- OH NO! THE NBT ARE IN CRISIS -

Nitro returns from commercial break to the dressing room of the Natural Born Thrillers. Reno, Palumbo, Johnny The Bull and Mike Sanders are sitting forlornly. Suddenly the door crashes open and O’Haire enters, followed by Jindrak, clutching at his head.

Mark Jindrak: I’m sorry okay! How many times do I have to say it?

Sean O’Haire: Damn right you should be sorry. We lost.

Mark Jindrak: Yeah, we lost, but where were you when I was getting my ass pinned?

Sean O’Haire: I was on the outside after getting knocked off the apron because of you.

Chuck Palumbo: If I’d teamed with you we’d have won.

Mark Jindrak: Shut up!

Chuck Palumbo: It’s true though.

Mark Jindrak: Listen here Palum-

Before we can get to here what will no doubt be an amazing insult from Jindrak he is interrupted by Mike Sanders.

Mike Sanders: Everyone shut the hell up! God, this will not help us any. Shawn’s gone already, the last thing we need is to be fighting like this…..

Unfortunately we can’t stay for the motivational speech as we’ve got a match to see…..

(77)

- “THE FRANCHISE” COMES THROUGH AGAINST ALL THE ODDS BUT HIS BIKE FARES LESS WELL -

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas vs. Sid

Indeed we do and the said match pits the big man, “The Millennium Jobber” Sid against “The Franchise” Shane Douglas, the #1 contender for the WCW United States Heavyweight Championship. Has Sid won a match since the New Year yet?

Well if he hadn’t he could only be more angry at management as his losing streak continued here, but what was incredible to everyone was that for the first time in living memory Sid was actually selling the offence of his opponent! “The Franchise” couldn’t believe it either and had consigned himself to the belief he’d get the shit kicked out of him and then win somehow, but in shock Sid actually sold the first punch from Douglas and from then we got a well structured, if average match with both men selling for each other. The crowd was also shocked by this apparent change of heart in Sid and actually began to enjoy the match as it went on. But of course this is Sid we’re talking about and pretty soon he was knackered (well you would be too if you were being jobbed on every TV and house show WCW does) and so the match slowed down slightly heading to the finish which saw “The Franchise” get the victory with a handful of tights off a roll-up for the 1-2-3. Of course though we’re heading towards a PPV and “The Franchise” arrived earlier tonight in a very expensive motorcycle. Not one to let an opportunity slip away, General Rection interrupted Douglas’ celebrations, driving the motorcycle onto the stage and then despite all “The Franchise” pleas, laying into it with a baseball bat and then tossing it off the stage to the concrete below, a good 8 foot drop. Of course “The Franchise” could have stopped it if he’d charged up the aisle at Rection but that wouldn’t be entertaining would it? Nitro went to a commercial with “The Franchise” almost in tears.

Well that didn’t suck too much. ½*

(56/75/69)

Winner: “The Franchise” Shane Douglas

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

- OFFICER! ARREST THAT MAN! -

And we’re back from commercial in the backstage area with an irate Shane Douglas and an unsympathetic Larry Zbysko.

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas: Do you have any idea how much that bike cost me Zbysko? Fifty grand! Fifty thousand dollars ruined because of that Rection. I want him arrested, I want him locked up, I want him to have to *bleep* in front of other men in a jail cell.

Larry Zbysko: You want me to intentionally have my WCW US Champion locked up? Are you insane Douglas, I can’t have my champions being convicted.

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas: Oh trust me I don’t want him convicted, I just want him to suffer the humiliation of being locked in a jail cell. I want him in that cell until Superbrawl. Then at Superbrawl you release him and I beat the living crap out of him, and take that WCW United States Heavyweight Championship as well.

Larry Zbysko: Look Douglas, as much as I dislike you, I can’t disagree with you here. I’ll get the police in.

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas: I want him a cell, and you make sure Zbysko, that his cell mate is a big 500 pound lonely man called Bubba!

Larry Zbysko: I’ll do my best, but I have other things on my mind, tonight I announce the first 5 men in the Time Crisis match.

“The Franchise” Shane Douglas: I don’t care, I just want General Rection locked up. Somehow I think Hugh will be a big hit in the slammer.

We go back to ringside with Tony Schiavone and Gary Michael Cappetta as “The Franchise” laughs at his own joke.

(71)

- IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER -

Goldberg vs. Jeff Jarrett

Once again we’re treated to Schiavone’s annoying “it’s main event time” drivel before we get to the match which tonight pits the Magnificent Seven’s Jeff Jarrett – fighting for the right to interfere at Superbrawl – against your favourite and mine Goldberg, as he emerges from the stage to a decent reaction.

Another show, another weak and disappointing main event for WCW. Even the undoubted skills of Jeff Jarrett couldn’t help here as Goldberg and Double J worked their way through a standard match. There wasn’t anything particularly wrong with the match, everything they did was average but the big disappointment is that they didn’t work the crowd at all and so besides the usual markish chants their wasn’t much for the fans to latch onto with the usual moves such as slams, suplexes, clotheslines and punching featuring prominently. In the ring though you could see the disbelief on the faces of both men as they couldn’t figure out why the crowd was being so apathetic to the match. Goldberg is perhaps the biggest star in the company and Jarrett is over but tonight the crowd just wasn’t interested. Even after the lacklustre crowd had quietened to the point that Bobby Heenan would have been able to hear himself think Goldberg and Jarrett did nothing to maybe add a little drama to their match, instead sticking to obvious pre-planned moves. In the end Jarrett went for the Figure Four, only to be kicked into the turnbuckle. Jarrett bounced out and was caught with a spear for the 1-2-3. Goldberg holds up five fingers as Nitro heads backstage.

¾* and move on.

(58/76/70)

Winner: Goldberg

- ZBYSKO ANNOUNCES THE FIRST FIVE -

Nitro closes out the evening in the office of WCW President Larry Zbysko. Zbysko is sitting behind a desk shuffling some papers about before looking up.

Larry Zbysko: Good evening. As you are all no doubt aware tonight I, Larry Zbysko, am scheduled to announce the first five participants into the WCW “Time Crisis” Match scheduled for Superbrawl Revenge. I now can reveal the first five participants I have chosen. The first man is former WCW World Champion……………Booker T!

The crowd cheer the anouncement that Booker T will compete at Superbrawl.

Larry Zbysko: The next competitor is the man who was defeated in an excellent contest by Goldberg tonight, I am talking of course about……..Jeff Jarrett!

The crowd boos at the inclusion of a Magnificent Seven member.

Larry Zbysko: The third man I have chosen is a friend and mentor of Jeff Jarrett, I am talking about a man who I myself have wrestled…………..”The Nature Boy” Ric Flair!

We get picture in picture from the collective WCW locker-room where all the superstars are hunched round a TV set. At the back are the Magnificent Seven minus Jarrett. Flair lets out a “whoooooooooo” at the announcement.

Larry Zbysko: The next man is a former World Heavyweight Champion and one of the greatest of all time……………”The American Dream” Dusty Rhodes!

The crowd cheers slightly at this but Rhodes has only lost on TV this year so far.

Larry Zbysko: The final man is a man who needs no introduction, a man who is WCW personified, I am talking of course of……………………Sting!

The crowd goes nuts at this announcement and Nitro goes off the air with the buoyant WCW fans chanting “STING!!! STING!!! STING!!!” over and over again.

(65)

Overall Show Rating: 70%

We got a 5.25 rating for 'Nitro'!

The attendance level was 6933 people.

We made $173325 from ticket sales.

WWF got a 6.90 television rating for 'RAW'!

The event was attended by 7542 people.

They made $301680 from ticket sales.

=====================================================

A NOTE FROM THE WRITER: College is hard. Sociology sucks. I would add in a "Fuck Dukes" but I quite like him actually.

=====================================================

ANSWERING BURNING DRAGON: The star ratings are made up by me and most of the time I look primarily at match quality to get the star rating. I don't bother with crowd much, especially where cruiserweights are concerned as the crowd isn't meant to respond to them.

=====================================================

Edited September 2, 2004 by ADGray

[Pesci]

Man, oh man. It was a very nice show (as per usual), but what's with a three-star match, with a whopping seventy out of a hundred match rating being a match of the year candidate? Sometimes it feels like you push the quality of the matches too hard in your reviews, when the ratings don't reflect it.

Goldberg squashing everybody like a bug is just a hint that he's gonna lose at Superbrawl. Let me guess; he beats everybody in the Magnificent Seven... Then comes up short to Steiner on Pay-Per-View.

Don't job out Sid. Don't job out Ekmo. Don't job out Kimo. In fact, push the latter two hard. You know how much I like them Big, untalented Samoans getting main-event pushes makes Dwagon a happy bunny.

Superbrawl is shaping up to be quite a nice card. Until Rey Rey totally disregards everything I learnt about physics in school and beats two three-hundred plus pounders by throwing his paperweight-like body about relentlessly.

Oh, and fuck Dukes.

[ADG]

WCW THUNDER PREVIEW

With only a little over a week to go until Superbrawl Revenge Goldberg steps into the squared circle one last time before his World Title match with Scott Steiner as he takes on “the dirtiest player in the game”, “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair! With all but Flair banned from ringside at Superbrawl Revenge Scott Steiner has to be feeling the pressure. Will he get involved tonight?

We’ll have singles action tonight as Kevin Nash goes one on one with Bryan Clarke! These two will meet at Superbrawl Revenge in a tag match, but tonight its singles action!

The WCW US Championship scene is hotting up with the champion and challenger on a collision course for Superbrawl. On Nitro General Rection upped the ante, destroying Shane Douglas’s $50,000 motorbike. “The Franchise” then had General Rection arrested for his actions. General Rection is now rumoured to be in police custody. Will “The Franchise” have anything to say tonight?

With Rey Misterio getting closer and closer to his showdown at Superbrawl Revenge with Straight Outta Samoa, Misterio has recieved some bad news. Chavo Guerrero has suffered an injury in training and now we have a case of poetic justice as Chavo Guerrero has joined Billy Kidman and Konnan on the injured list! But surely this will just mean it will be longer until Misterio can take the WCW Cruiserweight Championship? Tonight though, Straight Outta Samoa will take on 6 “Crash Test Dummies” who will test them before Superbrawl Revenge.

We haven’t heard anything from Terry Funk for the last week, the mind games having a profound impact on the living legend, but tonight Terry Funk will be in the house with a message for his anonymous opponent. What will it be? Tune in to find out!

The Natural Born Thrillers are having a bad run of luck at the moment. First Reno loses his shot at the US Title, then Shawn Stasiak is injured and then Jindrak & O’Haire lose to Air Raid on Nitro. Tonight the NBT look to change their fortunes somewhat as Jindrak & O’Haire face Helms & Moore in tag team action. Will Chuck Palumbo have something to say again tonight?

PLUS! With news from Larry Zbysko that only 10 more spots are up for grabs in the “Time Crisis” match, who will be picked? And if there are only 10 spots up for grabs and only 5 men have already been announced, that means there are 5 mystery entrants!

Don’t miss WCW Thunder tonight on TBS!

- Confirmed Matches -

Goldberg vs. Ric Flair

Kevin Nash vs. Bryan Clarke

Jindrak & O’Haire vs. Helms & Moore

Straight Outta Samoa vs. Crash Test Dummies

Edited September 5, 2004 by ADGray

[ADG]

The Diary of Andrew Duncan Gray

January 30th 2001

When Andy Met Sophie……………………Sophie walked off, leaving Andy with the bill

“How’s your toe?” she asked.

“Not good” I said. “It’s all swollen up and it’s turned purple.”

“Really?” she asked

“Nah” I said, “it’s more bluey than purple.”

“Stop messing about.”

“I’m not!”

I wasn’t either, my toe is a deep shade of blue right now and it still bloody hurts, but Sophie thought I was joking.

“Bloody hell this place is expensive.”

“You were the one who said to go somewhere nice.”

“Pizza Hut is nice, this, this….” I waved the menu in the air to emphasise my point “…..this is daylight robbery.” My frantic waving of the menu had attracted the attention of not only my fellow diners but to my surprise one of the waiters as well.

“Are you ready to order sir?”

“Huh? Oh, eh…..no.” I said, feeling guilty I’d pulled him away from doing fuck all to trudge the 5 metres to my table.

“Sir, it is restaurant etiquette to only summon a waiter when you are ready. Please remember that in future.” And he walked away all smug.

“Cheeky bastard” I said “That’s what you get in a place like this though. Upper-middle class pricks who take it from behind and think just because their accent isn’t pronounced it entitles them to some divine birthright to look down on anyone else.”

“Will you stop?”

“Fine, fine.” I stopped complaining but when she wasn’t looking I made a gesture that very handily informed the rest of the customers what I thought of the waiter, his sexual persuasion and what he did when he went home at night.

We spent the next 25 minutes discussing business, with a break every few minutes for me to moan about how long our starters were taking. When they finally came they were cold, so I called over the waiter again.

“Excuse me” I said.

“Yes?”

“This soup is cold.”

“It’s meant to be sir.”

“Since when is soup meant to be cold?”

“It’s gaspacho soup sir.”

“In that case this isn’t even the soup I asked for!” I told him. “I asked for the tomato and country vegetable.”

“I’m sorry sir.” he said “I’ll take it back to the kitchen.”

“For the love of God……”

He picked it up, put it back on his tray and trotted off to the kitchen. Sophie was just looking at me.

“What?” I asked.

“That was rude.”

“Rude? He got my order wrong!”

“No need to be like that though.”

“Like what?”

“That!”

“Just eat your bruschetta.”

“I’m not hungry now.”

“Oh for fucks sake.”

“I’m leaving.”

“What?”

“I’m leaving.”

“What about dinner?”

“I’ve got a microwave meal at home. I’ll have that.”

She got up, put her coat on and walked out the restaurant. As if by magic here comes the waiter again.

“Has madam left?”

“No the bitch walked out. Get me the cheque.”

“Yes sir, but if you could, please tone down your language.”

He didn’t even wait for a response, good thing too seeing as it would have been a punch in the mouth. $35 for uneaten bruschetta and cold soup. Bloody hell. The little bastard had even taken the liberty of adding on a tip. So it was nearer $50 in all.

“Fuck it.” I said. $35 from my wallet, onto the table. I picked up my coat and walked out. So yeah, there you go, not the best way to start trying to get to know Sophie.

[KJE]

The waiter reminded me of that guy that with freckles thats on every job possible that has a squeaky voice...

I found it funny... and Nitro was very well done.

[EndOfAnEra]

The teen guy from the Simpsons? He didn't say he'd have to ask his manager. If anything, I'd say he reminded me of the French waiter that refused to pronounce chowder as CHOWDAH!

Anyways, good diary in all, but I'm also dissapointed with the lack of research. O'Haire wasn't teaming with Jindrak, he was teaming with Palumbo. Major Stash hadn't been on TV for a long time. He was only in the MIA right at the start. Little things like that.

[Karizma]

He teamed with Palumbo after the NBT had Jindrak/O'Haire & Perfect Event both won a Number 1 Contenders match, which they got a title shot at Sin, if I remember correctly, which means everythings fine.Except for Air Raid, who didn't debut until the Cruiserweight Tag Title tournament, or thats how I remember it.

Although lack of Commish Cat/Lance Storm/Mike Sanders is pissing me off, ]