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EWB's Top 104 Artists 2013 - Results


METALMAN

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Some odd ones not making the list - surprised to see Bob Dylan, and the ubiquitous Muse not making it. Makes things more interesting, though, I suppose.

I've warmed to Queen. As people who pay attention to these threads might remember, I used to absolutely detest them. Now, I don't take music quite as seriously as I once did and while they're often not my cup of tea, I admit that they have their moments. Surprised to see them so low, as they generally seem to do well on here, if I remember correctly.

Michael Jackson's another one I expected to fare better. Never particularly cared for him, don't buy into the "King Of Pop" hype or any of that. Had some good songs, but just as much tat. Not my thing.

I absolutely can't stand Slipknot. It's death metal for children. Everything I can't stand about heavy metal, heavy metal's fans, the heavy metal "scene" wrapped up in one package. It baffles me that they're still considered even remotely relevant. Don't do a single thing that hasn't been done before, and better. Responsible for the worst live album I've ever heard, thanks to my dad listening to it in the car one time he gave me a lift. I hate singers who constantly swear at their audiences. They're bollocks, is what I'm getting at.

Portishead are absolutely bloody lovely. They get a lot of stick for being middle class and boring, but they're absolutely wonderful. "Third" was one of the most exciting albums I'd heard in years. I saw them perform live in 2007, their first gig in ages, shortly before that album was released, and it was absolutely fantastic. One of the best live bands I've seen. A pleasant surprise to see them make this list.

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I like Queen. I don't have any of their albums, nor do I think I will ever go out of my way to acquire any of them, but they have some good songs and I'll jam along if I hear some of their tunes. Michael Jackson, though, he is another story; I basically grew up with his music as my dad is a huge fan of his funk and pop expression and he played a lot of it for me when I was young and even took me to see him live back in 1997 when he visited Denmark. Surprised to see him this low, a bit saddened by it even; would have guessed for at least a top 20 spot but that goes to show how much I know apparently.

Yeah, Slipknot are terrible and annoying and their hardcore fans suck, moving on.

Never actually dug that much into Portishead before recently but as Skummy said, they are bloody wonderful. Plus, Tricky sampled "Glory Box" for one of his best ever tracks so yeah.

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thanks to my dad listening to it in the car one time he gave me a lift.

Say whaaaaaaaaaaaat.

My dad's basically of the "try anything once" school of music listening. He's mostly into hard rock, blues and some metal, and he used to have a nice little earner selling CDs on eBay. He picked up a Slipknot live album to sell, and put it on in the car, presumably to see what all the fuss was about. I'm amazed he listened to it all the way through.

To clarify, no, my father is not a Slipknot fan.

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I've listened to a few Queen albums, and none of them have been particularly pleasant experiences. However, both of their greatest hits albums have very welcome places in my collection. In a way I quite like how they do shit musicals and play gigs with suspect singers. I get annoyed when people are a bit too precious about their music. And Brian May seems a likeable sort (grandstanding on Buckingham Palace aside). It is nice that he cares about badgers. Oh and yeah, they had some bloody good choons.

Michael Jackson is generally quite good. As much as I dislike the man - I hate crotch grabbing - he was a good popstar. Perhaps it's due to overplaying, but if I listen to Michael Jackson it tends to be one of his "lesser" singles: You Rock My World; They Don't Care About Us. A Michael Jackson single can usually be relied upon to be good. Unless it was a ballad. His ballads are shit.

Believe it or not, I had never properly listened to Slipknot until a few months ago. At school a lot of my friends liked them when I was around 10 or 11, but even at that age I was a dick and had to be different, so I gave Corey and his boys a wide berth. That was until a few months ago, when I found myself back at a flat belonging to one of these Slipknot listening friends. Like so many people, he hadn't moved on at all. He is also a feckless lazy stoner, repulsive to women with horrible tattoos. A nice guy though. But anyway, he stuck on a Slipknot album as he rolled up one. Not taking part, because I am STRAIGHT EDGE SXE, I had little to do but listen to the music. And you know what? Initially the rush of brutal noise was quite exciting. But then I realised every song was the same, and every moment of every song was the same. Slipknot are shit.

I only know Portishead's debut. Probably my second favourite album of That Bristol Scene. And I like a lot from That Bristol Scene. Very haunting and unsettling. I certainly don't hate them for being middle class and boring. I'm middle class and boring.

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SRN's thoughts on Queen pretty much echo my own. I wouldn't say I'm a huge fan of their's but I wouldn't not listen to one of their songs.

Michael Jackson is pretty much the same.

I used to listen (and like) to Slipknot a lot but I was a dumb teenager with terrible taste in music so of course I did. They have a song or two that I wouldn't shoot myself in the face for listening to but outside of that, I've completely outgrown that awkward phase of my life.

As one of the two that voted for Portishead, it's great to see them make the list especially since I didn't think they would. It'd be nice if they were higher but I won't get greedy. Third is a fantastic album and I'd recommend that you listen to it ASAP if you haven't already.

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I like Queen. I like MJ. Slipknot have some decent songs, but I'm in no rush to listen to them given how much I was exposed to them in high school.

I still need to listen to Portishead sometime.

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I've warmed to Queen. As people who pay attention to these threads might remember, I used to absolutely detest them. Now, I don't take music quite as seriously as I once did and while they're often not my cup of tea, I admit that they have their moments. Surprised to see them so low, as they generally seem to do well on here, if I remember correctly.

I'd like to think Skummy saw the "Don't Stop Me Now" scene in Shaun of the Dead and was like "Dammit, now I want to sing along to this."

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Portishead are fantastic. I know it's a live album, but Roseland NYC Live is just a great album. It's a good blend of some of their best songs from the only albums they had at the time - backed by an orchestra. Love it.

Didn't enjoy Third too much, unfortunately.

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God, Slipknot. The worst. The absolute worst. Even Disturbed and Five Finger Death Punch are better than them.

Queen are wonderful though, and some of MJ's songs are pretty catchy.

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HEROES OF COUNTRY MUSIC SPECIAL

=100. Taylor Swift

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JO8pZGH2WBU

Number of votes: 2

Highest position: 7th

Does my dad like her? He doesn't know her

Did you know??? Taylor Swift's endorsement of Diet Coke isn't a mere ploy for a little bit more money. Swift is actually an Illuminati puppet, tasked with pushing the mind rotting drink to the masses, dulling our senses and clouding our thoughts.

99. Hank Williams

Number of votes: 2

Highest position: 3rd

Does my dad like her? He doesn't really care for him, or for country music in general.

Did you know??? Hank Williams was portrayed by Henry Thomas in the 2011 film The Last Ride, capturing the singer's tragic and premature death. Funnily enough, it was actually through a series of tombstone piledrivers that Williams ultimately met his grisly end at the hands of the Undertaker. Research it a bit more thoroughly next time guys!

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EWWWW! CANADIANS! SPECIAL

98. Arcade Fire

Number of votes: 2

Highest position: 2nd

Does my dad like them? He likes one song

Did you know??? The members of Arcade Fire are named Flex, Slim, Doc, Mikey, Shorty and Pops. They are junkies living in East Harlem, where they have eked out a living for some time - fifty years in the case of the 60 year old Doc, who first tasted the sweet succour of heroin at the age of 14. They all hung out in a building they referred to as a shooting gallery, which was in reality a disused arcade. Each member had a different preference: Mikey stuck to heroin; Slim cooked up speedballs; Flex, with his array of collapsed veins required special help from Pops to get the needle in the back of his neck and Doc would inject whatever fell upon the floor. Who else? Oh yes, Shorty. Well, Shorty was happy with his crack pipe! They were also quite musical, but as you might imagine, what they produced in their intertwined highs and lows of cocaine, crack and heroin resulted in quite an unsettling sound! Then one day, their shooting gallery - the arcade - went on fire. This was the titular Arcade Fire.

97. Devin Townsend

Number of votes: 2

Highest position: 1st

Does my dad like him? He doesn't know him

Did you know??? Devon towns end at the sea, as well as at the borders with Cornwall, Somerset and Dorset.

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Only two I've seen so far I'd really call my self a fan of are MJ and Slipknot.

Love a lot of MJ's songs. he was just great.

Slipknot I like but they're not a favorite or anything. I remember I didn't give them a chance till my second year of High School because when I first heard of them I was middle school and even though I was into rock and metal then I noticed almost all the Slipknot fans wore nothing but their Slipknot shirts and Tripp Pants and looked kinda dirty and that just rubbed me the wrong way. Fuse playing their music videos is what got me to listen to them.

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