LoveMuscle

Sunday, May 25, 2003

As incredible as it may sound, after their match last week, Masato Tanaka complained about how stiff Rick Steiner was working. Um, hello kettle, this is pot. You’re black. Actually, I guess I have to take that one back, because nobody has complained about Tanaka – yet.

Just before the pay-per-view begins, New Jack’s music hits and the fans cheer. He comes out with Masato Tanaka and Ebessan for what he calls a “toughness demonstration.” Ebessan hands New Jack a chair, and he nails Tanaka with it! He tells Tanaka to get something, so he looks under the ring and finds a Singapore cane. What was that doing under there? He hands it to New Jack, who then breaks it over Ebessan’s head! Ebessan falls, but quickly pops back up. New Jack tells the crowd that there’s nothing Kronik can do to them that’s worse than what he just did, and look – they’re still standing and ready for more.

OR: 83

TNA May-hem

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and this is May-hem! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s show!

Kavovit: Last Wednesday on Total Nonstop Action, commissioner Mick Foley announced the card for tonight’s show, and man, is it a doozie!

Snake: There’s a reason why this show is called May-hem, just look in the ring. Moments ago, New Jack and the Hardcore Japanese came out for what New Jack called a “toughness demonstration.”

Kavovit: Look, Tanaka’s bleeding!

Snake: I don’t think that matters to him, and … here comes Kronik!

Masato Tanaka & Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Kronik (with Cyrus The Virus): Adams and Clark hit the ring and go right after the Hardcore Japanese. It’s a pier-6 brawl and the referee can’t seem to get it down to just one man from each side in the ring. Finally, Adams and Ebessan go over the top rope, so the referee calls for the bell to start the match. It’s a very good match, these guys really took it up a notch tonight. The crowd was … there. Finally, Tanaka hits a Roaring Elbow on Brian Adams, and Clark can’t make the save in time. However, the brawl does continue, and soon after Malice hits the ring to give his side the advantage. Suddenly, despite already being at ringside, New Jack’s music plays, and through the curtain steps Akira Taue with a trashcan full of plunder! Cyrus wisely withdraws his troops before the plunder can be used. I get the feeling this is far from over.

Winner: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan

OR: 78

CR: 69

MQ: 87

Ken Shamrock (with Alicia Shamrock) vs. Mike Sanders: It’s a shame that Sanders is a non-wrestler, I’d like to use him more often than just once a month. With that said, you can guess who’s getting the push here. Shamrock makes quick work of Sanders, cinching in the Ankle Lock in about five minutes. Sanders quickly taps out. A good match, for what it was.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 79

CR: 76

MQ: 82

Curt Hennig vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): As the combatants enter the ring, clips from last Wednesday’s show are shown to help set up the match. The fans start booing Siaki even before the match begins. They love to hate him. It’s a decent match, but the fans make a lot of noise, so I guess they don’t care that it’s not as good as the first two matches were. Siaki, who has pretty much stayed in the X-division ranks, proves to be surprisingly capable of a good technical match. When he does add in the high-flying moves, it proves to be too much for Hennig. Siaki finishes him off with the Money Clip.

Winner: Sonny Siaki

OR: 79

CR: 80

MQ: 78

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 76 to 78.)

NWA X title match: Ron Killings vs. TAKA Michinoku © (with Vince Russo): I should have made Russo buy a ticket, since he’s got his guys in consecutive matches in this part of the card. I’m sure that he’ll be at ringside for all of them, since he’s not trying to negotiate matches with commissioner Mick Foley tonight. It’s a very good match, with both sides showing off their impressive display of moves. I think Killings was so focused on just making it to this match, he’s not really prepared. That gives TAKA the advantage, and he’s able to get Killings in position for the Michinoku Driver to score the pin.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 83

CR: 84

MQ: 86

(The NWA X title has gained in image from 79 to 81.)

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. Disco Inferno & Konnan (with Vince Russo): Another good match with good crowd heat – maybe they just hate Russo? I can understand that. The Road Warriors control for most of the match, and in the end they get Konnan set up for the Doomsday Device. However, Russo jumps up on the apron and shakes the top rope, causing Hawk to lose his balance. While the referee tries to get Russo off the apron, Disco clips Animal, causing him to drop Konnan and roll around on the mat while holding his knee. Konnan recovers, and sees Animal in pain. He quickly applies the Tequila Sunrise on the injured knee, and Animal taps out! SEX scores the upset victory to become the tag champs.

Winner: Disco Inferno & Konnan

OR: 82

CR: 81

MQ: 84

Sting vs. Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): Combine the crowd’s hatred for all things Russo and their love for Sting, and you get some insane crowd heat. In this case, you also get a good match. Sting has learned how Russo operates since the first time these two men faced each over six weeks ago. Russo tries to pass a chair to Hall like in their last encounter, but his aim is off. As Hall tries to retrieve the chair, he leaves himself in perfect position for Sting to apply the Scorpion Death Drop, and the pinfall is academic. However, Hall recovers and grabs the chair. Sting turns around, and gets blasted. Hall celebrates his shallow victory.

Winner: Sting

OR: 88

CR: 92

MQ: 81

Backstage, Cyrus The Virus knocks on a door and says it’s time. The door opens, and Bill Goldberg starts walking to the ring.

OR: 87

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Bill Goldberg (with Cyrus The Virus): Unfortunately, the crowd can’t sustain their enthusiasm from the last match, but it’s still plenty loud. Good back-and-forth action, but the champion has finally met his match. Goldberg is just too strong for Jarrett. Spear! The crowd rises to their feet in anticipation of a new champion. Jackhammer! That’s all. Cyrus presents Goldberg with the belt, and the crowd boos as he proudly displays it over his head.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 82

CR: 84

MQ: 80

OR: 82

Buy rate: 1.55

Attendance: 16638

Best segment: Sting over Scott Hall (88)

Worst segment: Masato Tanaka & Ebessan over Kronik (78)

Best match: Sting over Scott Hall (88)

Wednesday, May 21, 2003

Last week’s show was just “one of those days.” As a result, all the match ratings were seriously affected, which helped produce a three-way tie for Best Match of the Night honors. One person who wasn’t pleased was Jeff Jarrett. The champion didn’t want to do the job for Disco & Konnan, even if they did need Goldberg’s help to do it. Since this is the last show before May-hem, I felt I had to put him in a match tonight to help restore his morale.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait to see Sting get his hands on Disco Inferno!

Kavovit: Last week, Disco Inferno, along with Konnan, defeated Sting and Jeff Jarrett in a tag match.

Snake: Sting has been fighting against SEX ever since he first arrived, and tonight is another chapter in that ongoing saga.

Kavovit: It wasn’t exactly a clean pinfall since Bill Goldberg interfered. Tonight, Jarrett takes on Goldberg’s former partner, Malice, and Goldberg will be taking on Perry Saturn.

Snake: Another match I’m looking forward to is Ron Killings versus Sonny Siaki.

Kavovit: Siaki has challenged Killings for the X-division No. 1 contender’s role, and earlier today Ron Killings had these words about that match.

The video screen comes to life, showing Ron Killings in his street clothes. Well, it’s not too different than his ring attire, but that’s another story. He reminds us that last month, he was the No. 1 contender less than a week before April Action, and now he finds himself in the same predicament. However, this time he plans on seeing it through all the way to May-hem against TAKA Michinoku. Time for The Truth: The only way Siaki gets the title shot is to pry it from his cold, dead hands.

OR: 86

Akira Taue & Masato Tanaka (with New Jack) vs. Rick Steiner & Marcus Bagwell: Vince Russo is conspicuous by his absence. Kavovit and Snake mention it, but then say it’s a good that he’s not here to interfere. Tanaka and Taue surprisingly dominate Steiner and Bagwell – maybe Russo does a better job than we all thought. Surprisingly, it’s a good match, and it ends when Tanaka hits a Roaring Elbow on Steiner for the pin. The victory is short-lived, as Kronik jumps them from behind. Both Tanaka and Taue fall victim to the High Times.

Winner: Akira Taue & Masato Tanaka

OR: 72

CR: 64

MQ: 80

Backstage, Cyrus The Virus sits patiently while Bill Goldberg paces. Kronik walks in, and Cyrus congratulates them on a job well done. Cyrus then looks to the camera, and challenges Jeff Jarrett to face Goldberg at May-hem! He tells Jarrett to watch Goldberg’s match against Perry Saturn later for a sample of what Goldberg has in store for him.

OR: 76

X-division No. 1 contender’s match: Ron Killings vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Hmm, Russo’s at ringside for this match. Snake says he wonders where he was earlier, and Kavovit says that Steiner and Bagwell must have the same questions. A good match, and as usual the fans really get into it. These two have fought so often, they know each other’s moves and their counters to those moves. After about 12 minutes, TAKA Michinoku comes out with the X title belt. He gets up on the apron as Siaki tries for an Irish Whip, but Killings reverses it, and sends Siaki into the belt. Fate can be so cruel and ironic. Killings rolls up Siaki for the easy pin. TAKA jumps into the ring to get a head start on Sunday, and Siaki joins in for a 2-on-1 beatdown until Curt Hennig hits the ring to even the odds. The announcers dive into the usual Hennig/Killings friendship story as the members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme take off.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 83

CR: 83

MQ: 84

Backstage, Sting tells us he’s got two things on his mind. First, he challenges Scott Hall to a match this Sunday. He tells us he’s beaten just about everyone there is to beat in SEX, except Hall, who scored a cheap victory over Sting last month. As for tonight, he says he’s hear Disco Inferno bragging about getting the pin in last week’s tag match, and tonight he’s going to prove that it was just a fluke. He tells Disco to pray to the Lord for mercy, because Sting won’t show him any.

OR: 94

Perry Saturn vs. Bill Goldberg (with Cyrus The Virus): Like last week, Goldberg finishes Saturn off in less than two minutes. After a Jackhammer and the pin, Goldberg tells Jarrett that he’s next.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 76

CR: 69

MQ: 83

The camera cuts backstage, where a live feed from the arena is playing on a monitor. Goldberg continues to taunt Jarrett, until Jarrett appears and turns the monitor off. He tells Goldberg that he accepts the challenge, and he’ll see him Sunday at May-hem. Then he tells Goldberg it’s his turn to watch what Jarrett does to Malice.

OR: 90

Sting vs. Disco Inferno: Once again, no Russo. What could be more important than his guy’s match with Sting? Without outside interference, Sting finishes Disco off in about five minutes with the Scorpion Death Drop.

Winner: Sting

OR: 82

CR: 85

MQ: 78

The camera cuts backstage to the vending area, where tonight we find … Mike Sanders. He asks Alicia Shamrock if she remembers their meeting there last week. He tells us that Alicia and Ken Shamrock stayed away tonight, and that Ken has challenged him to a match at May-hem. He tells us that he accepts, so he can show Alicia how a real man is supposed to act around a woman.

OR: 72

Non-title match: Jeff Jarrett vs. Malice (with Cyrus The Virus): Jarrett carries Malice to a decent match, even doing a surprising amount of selling for the bigger man. However, in about eight minutes Malice falls victim to the Stroke. After the pinfall, Bill Goldberg and Kronik come out of the back and surround the ring. Just as it looks like they’re going to make their move, New Jack and the Hardcore Japanese rush the ring, standing with Jarrett, preparing to take on all comers. They even brought their own weapons with them – a chair for Tanaka, a stop sign for Taue, a Singapore cane for Ebessan, and of course a crutch for New Jack. Jarrett, I guess, has to make do with the World title belt.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 75

CR: 71

MQ: 79

Just when it looks like Cyrus and his men are going to make their move, Mick Foley’s music hits, and the commissioner comes out, which delays the 5-on-5 fight. Foley tells us that he’s been negotiating with Vince Russo for most of the evening. Oh, so that’s where he’s been. He says that Russo lobbied for Konnan and Disco Inferno to get a Tag Team title match based on their win last week over Jarrett and Sting, and he’s made that match. Also, Russo says Scott Hall accepts Sting’s challenge, so that match is also on for Sunday. And, as a result of action earlier tonight, Russo and Sonny Siaki have challenged Curt Hennig, and he’s accepted, so we’ll also have that match at May-hem. Now, for those in the ring and surrounding it, since Jarrett wants to fight Goldberg for the title, then so be it. Also, this Sunday Kronik will get their shot at the team of Masato Tanaka & Ebessan. And that decision is final!

OR: 91

(Mick Foley gained in over from 85 to 89.)

OR: 81

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7007

Best segment: Interview with Sting (94)

Worst segment: (tie) Interview with Mike Sanders; Akira Taue & Masato Tanaka over Rick Steiner & Marcus Bagwell (72)

Best match: Ron Killings over Sonny Siaki (83)

Wednesday, May 14, 2003

After last week’s show, Ebessan told me that Bill Goldberg was working too stiff in their match. That’s the first complaint I’ve had about him. I make a note of it for future reference.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait to find out who Sting has chosen to be his partner tonight against Konnan and Disco Inferno!

Kavovit: Not only that, but last week commissioner Mick Foley made a Fatal Four-way match for tonight to determine the No. 1 contender for the X title.

Snake: It’ll be Ron Killings, Jody Fleisch, Brian Lawler, and Sonny Siaki. What if Siaki wins?

Kavovit: Then I guess he’ll have to face his SEX cohort, TAKA Michinoku, for the title at May-hem. But also, tonight, we have a Tag Team title match, and Bill Goldberg will be in action tonight with his new manager, Cyrus The Virus.

Snake: Last week, Cyrus purchased the contracts of Goldberg, as well as Kronik and Malice.

Kavovit: Kronik will be in action against the Hardcore Japanese, but right now let’s head to the ring for our first match.

Norman Smiley vs. Michael Modest: A decent opener, but it doesn’t live up to our expectations. It looks like it’s going to be one of those nights. Smiley gets Modest in the Norman Conquest, and Modest quickly submits.

Winner: Norman Smiley

OR: 63

CR: 65

MQ: 76

Backstage, Sonny Siaki is preparing for the Fatal Four-way match later tonight. Vince Russo approaches and tells him that he has just one mission tonight: make sure Jody Fleisch doesn’t win. Siaki looks confused, and Russo reassures him that it’s OK to win, because either way the belt will stay with Sports Entertainment Xtreme. Siaki smiles and continues his preparations.

OR: 84

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 74 to 76.)

Akira Taue & Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Kronik (with Cyrus The Virus): A good match that begins with Kronik spending a lot of time watching their new manager. I don’t think they’re quite sure why Cyrus is in their corner and not Percy Pringle. Eventually, they focus on the match at hand, which ends when Bryan Clark pins Taue after High Times. Ebessan enters the ring, and the brawl starts up again. Even New Jack gets a few shots in, but no crutches are broken, which means this wasn’t an official New Jack Match™. Eventually, the brawl goes backstage.

Winner: Kronik

OR: 63

CR: 60

MQ: 82

B.G. James and Scott Hall are backstage, making fun of the Road Warriors. Actually, it’s pretty funny. The gist of this parody is that the Road Warriors are old, and that Hall & James are going to beat them for the Tag Team titles tonight.

OR: 75

X-Division No. 1 contender’s Fatal Four-way match: Jody Fleisch vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo) vs. Brian Lawler vs. Ron Killings: Damn, that has to be one of the longest match titles in the history of wrestling. About four minutes in, Siaki nails Fleisch with the Siakalypse and scores the pinfall, eliminating Fleisch. I guess Siaki met Russo’s requirement for tonight. However, Siaki taunts Fleisch afterwards, which allows Lawler to sneak up behind him and roll him up for the pinfall. Lawler tells Killings to bring it, and he does. The match continues for another three minutes before Killings scores the pin with a Truth Or Consequences to earn the title shot at May-hem. A good match, and the fans were really into it as well.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 72

CR: 79

MQ: 84

Backstage, the cameras find Bill Goldberg sitting on a bench while Cyrus The Virus explains things to him. Goldberg will be taking on Anthony Durante tonight, but Cyrus knows that Goldberg won’t have any trouble with him. He tells Goldberg it’s time to quit fooling around and get down to the business at hand – winning the World title from Jeff Jarrett. Cyrus says he’s got a plan, which brings a smile to Goldberg. Weird segment, totally out of character for Goldberg. I mean, sitting and smiling at the same time? What’s up with that?

OR: 79

(Cyrus The Virus gained in over from 70 to 73.)

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. Scott Hall & B.G. James (with Vince Russo): Another good match, and the fans are down with it as well. Surprisingly, Hall is actually able to stand toe-to-toe with the Road Warriors, and often controls the match when he’s in the ring. However, James continues to struggle against them, despite his recent experiences against them. In the end, the Road Warriors are too much for James, and they connect with the Doomsday Device. Hawk keeps Hall at bay while Animal scores the pin.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 72

CR: 81

MQ: 82

Backstage, Disco Inferno and Konnan tell us it doesn’t matter who Sting picks as his partner, they don’t have the experience working together like Konnan and Disco do. Um, I don’t recall them being a tag team, but SEX swaps partners around so much I have a hard time keeping track.

OR: 77

Anthony Durante vs. Bill Goldberg (with Cyrus The Virus): There’s a certain vegetable that people would use to describe this match, it’s just not coming to me now. Okra? No, that’s not it. Zucchini? No, that’s not it either. Oh, now I remember – squash! Goldberg dominates Durante, scoring the pin in less than three minutes after a Jackhammer. Good match for what it was.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 69

CR: 74

MQ: 81

Backstage, the cameras are at the vending area. Predictably, Alicia Shamrock peeks around the corner, finding the area deserted. She tells herself she can do this, and walks to the soda machine. Before depositing her coins, she checks over her shoulder, again not finding anyone. However, if she’d been a moment later, she would have seen Mike Sanders. As she bends over to get the can of soda, Sanders’ eyes bulge and he lets loose a wolf whistle. Alicia is startled, and Sanders walks over to her. She’s obviously frightened. He asks why she’s so frightened, until he’s tapped on the shoulder. He turns around, and Curt Hennig is standing there. He tells Sanders to mind his own business as Alicia escapes down the hall.

OR: 88

(Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 66 to 68. Mike Sanders gained in over from 69 to 71.)

Konnan, Disco Inferno, and Vince Russo come to the ring. They continue to run down Sting, saying he couldn’t find a partner. Finally Sting’s music plays, and he walks through the curtain. Russo asks where his partner is, and Sting just waves to the back. The curtain opens, and it’s …

Sting & Jeff Jarrett vs. Disco Inferno & Konnan (with Vince Russo): Russo looks shocked that Sting chose the World champion as his partner. Kavovit and Snake remind us that Jarrett also has had issues with SEX, so it’s not that much of a stretch. The fans are really excited to see two of their favorites working together. However, the match barely lasts five minutes before Bill Goldberg comes to ringside. He trips up Jarrett, who stumbles right into a Last Dance from Disco. Konnan attacks Sting as the referee, who never saw Goldberg interfere, counts the pin.

Winner: Disco Inferno & Konnan

OR: 72

CR: 83

MQ: 76

(Sting dropped in over from 98 to 97. Jeff Jarrett dropped in over from 86 to 85. Konnan gained in over from 74 to 75. Disco Inferno gained in over from 76 to 77.)

OR: 73

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 7029

Best segment: Interview with Sting (88)

Worst segment: Alicia Shamrock meets Mike Sanders, Curt Hennig makes the save (88)

Best match: (tie) Ron Killings wins the Fatal Four-way; Road Warriors over B.G. James & Scott Hall; Disco Inferno & Konnan over Sting & Jeff Jarrett (72)

Wednesday, May 7, 2003

Our contract with the Urban America Network came to an end last week, and we decided no to renew the contract despite not landing a major network TV deal. Another TV contract that ended last week was Ring of Honor’s High Impact TV. With its cancellation, the lowest-rated wrestling program now is Jersey All Pro Wrestling’s Weekly show Friday evenings on some local network.

I received another job offer yesterday, this time from Combat Zone Wrestling. They are at the Regional level, but are nearly $1.5 million in debt. While it would be an interesting challenge to turn the promotion around, I’m very happy where I am right now.

With the loss of XPlosion, I now have only three shows to build to May-hem. Hopefully, that network deal will work out by the end of this month.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait for tonight’s main event, with Sting facing Sonny Siaki!

Kavovit: The former X-division champion should pose Sting’s toughest challenge since he arrived in TNA, so we’ll see how he does.

Snake: Also, Bill Goldberg was outraged by his loss to Masato Tanaka last week, and tonight he’ll be taking on Tanaka’s pal, Ebessan.

Kavovit: I’m sure Goldberg will be looking for a little payback in that one. Also, in a few minutes Perry Saturn will be taking on Brian Lawler, and a little later Ken Shamrock will be facing Richard Slinger. Earlier today, our cameras caught this exchange between Ken Shamrock and his wife, Alicia.

The video screen comes to life with a shot of Alicia nervously pacing in the dressing room. The door opens, and in walks Ken Shamrock with a can of soda. He hands it to her and tells her it wasn’t that big of a deal. Alicia tells him that just thinking about going to the vending machines brings back bad memories for her. Ken promises that after he makes Richard Slinger tap out they’ll call her psychologist to help her get over this problem.

OR: 85

(Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 64 to 66.)

Perry Saturn vs. Brian Lawler: It’s always good to start the show off with a good X-division match. And it is a good match, with about as much fan interest as any opening match in recent weeks. Maybe getting rid of the less-over performers was a good thing, after all. In the end, Lawler hits a Missile Dropkick and covers Saturn. Saturn gets his foot on the ropes, but the referee doesn’t see it and counts to three. As Lawler gets up, he moves Saturn’s leg off the ropes, still without the ref noticing.

Winner: Brian Lawler

OR: 71

CR: 61

MQ: 81

After the match, Lawler walks to the announcers’ desk. This should be interesting. He calls out commissioner Mick Foley! The fans cheer when Foley walks through the curtain. Lawler boasts about his victory over Saturn and how he should get a title shot net week. Foley seems skeptical, pointing out the referee’s mistake while questioning whether Lawler deserves a title shot. Finally, he makes his decision – next week, right here in the TNA Asylum (thumbs up, cheap pop), it will be Brian Lawler vs. Jody Fleisch vs. Sonny Siaki vs. Ron Killings, with the winner getting a title shot at May-hem. Lawler pouts, and then walks off.

OR: 71

(Mick Foley dropped in over from 87 to 85.)

Backstage, New Jack stands with Ebessan. New Jack again iterates that he just doesn’t understand all the hype for the X division, but in Ebessan’s match tonight against Bill Goldberg, there won’t be none of that crap. It’ll be a brawl, and he thinks Ebessan will be able to hold his own. After all, last week Masato Tanaka proved that Goldberg can be beaten.

OR: 75

Ken Shamrock (with Alicia Shamrock) vs. Richard Slinger: A good match, but it’s pretty much a squash for Shamrock. Alicia is noticeably looking over her shoulder quite often, obviously still concerned about another abduction. Finally, Shamrock locks in the Ankle Lock, and Slinger taps out.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 76

CR: 71

MQ: 82

Sonny Siaki is in the SEX locker room, talking trash about Sting. He says Sting has never faced anyone like him, and that Sting’s too old to keep up with him. Siaki even says he can run circles around Sting. Maybe someone should tell Siaki that he’s in a wrestling match tonight, not a foot race.

OR: 82

Meanwhile, Sting is standing by outside his dressing room. He tells us that he’s not done with Sports Entertainment Xtreme, and tonight Siaki is the next one on his list.

OR: 88

Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Another good match, but this one’s pretty much all Goldberg. Sure, Ebessan has his moments, but they’re all short-lived. In the end, it’s the standard Spear/Jackhammer combo that gets the pin for Goldberg.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 78

CR: 74

MQ: 82

Goldberg celebrates his win in the ring with Percy Pringle as New Jack helps Ebessan back to the locker room. Surprisingly, Cyrus The Virus walks through the curtain with a briefcase! He hasn’t been seen in more than a month. Goldberg and Pringle warily watch him as he gets a microphone and enters the ring. Cyrus talks about all four wrestlers that Pringle manages, and the good qualities that they all have. He points out that despite their talent, only Kronik has received a title shot, and even then only one. He says he’s got connections with the networks, and he can market them beyond NWA: TNA. He offers to buy all four contracts from Pringle. Pringle laughs and shakes his head, until Cyrus opens the briefcase and explains that there’s $500,000 in it. It doesn’t take Pringle long to take the briefcase and shake Cyrus’ hand. Pringle leaves, and Goldberg looks confused by the turn of events. Cyrus leaves the ring and beckons for Goldberg to follow him. After a few moments, he does.

OR: 82

(Percy Pringle gained in over from 73 to 74. Cyrus The Virus gained in over from 68 to 70.)

Sting vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Another good match, making us 4-for-4 tonight. I’ll take that any night. Oh, and the fans are into this one as well, which is an added bonus. Russo helps Siaki get the advantage several times, only to have Sting eventually re-take control. Eventually Sting hits the Scorpion Death Drop, which causes Russo to jump up on the ring apron. Instead of covering, Sting punches Russo, knocking him to the floor. Siaki’s back up, but Sting floors him with a punch and then applies the Scorpion Death Lock for the submission. Suddenly, Disco Inferno and Konnan charge the ring, but Sting slides out.

Winner: Sting

OR: 84

CR: 86

MQ: 82

Russo gets a microphone before joining his troops in the ring, as Sting continues playing to the crowd. He tells Sting to get a partner for next week – anyone he wants – and face Disco and Konnan. Sting nods his head, so I guess it’s on next week.

OR: 77

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 6546

Best segment: Interview with Sting (88)

Worst segment: (tie) Brian Lawler over Perry Saturn; Brian Lawler confronts Mick Foley (71)

Best match: Sting over Sonny Siaki (84)

Thursday, May 1, 2003

The falling industry has taken a toll. Today, IPW Hardcore, Future Of Wrestling, World Xtreme Wrestling, Extreme Canadian Championship Wrestling, World League Wrestling, and All Pro Wrestling all announced that they are no longer financially able to put on matches, and these companies have folded. Also, Major League Wrestling has issued a bankruptcy notice, and our financial experts predict they will fold at the end of this month.

Percy Pringle came to me after the show last night and told me that he thought he wasn’t doing a very good job as a manager any more, and wanted to quit that part of the business. He offered to stay on as a non-wrestler, and for now I have accepted. Really, I don’t know how long I’ll hold on to him in that capacity, but we’ll see.

Steven Kavovit assures me that there will probably be some wrestlers ready to be promoted from Japan next month but nothing this month. Also, we’ve signed a few new performers from the now-defunct promotions, but they have been assigned to training camp or NWA Japan. With no new additions, here’s what our active roster looks like today (faces in blue, heels in red, tweeners in black, all followed by their current over):

MAIN EVENT

Sting (98)

UPPER MIDCARD

Ron Killings (89)

Jeff Jarrett (86)

Curt Hennig (84)

Road Warrior Hawk (81)

Road Warrior Animal (78)

MIDCARDERS

Jody Fleisch (86)

Ken Shamrock (85)

Masato Tanaka (80)

Ebessan (70)

Norman Smiley (70)

Anthony Durante (65)

Brian Lawler (71)

Scott Hall (89)

Bill Goldberg (85)

TAKA Michinoku (84)

B.G. James (78)

Marcus Bagwell (78)

Disco Inferno (76)

Konnan (74)

Sonny Siaki (74)

Michael Modest (67)

Bryan Clark (64)

Rick Steiner (64)

Malice (63)

Brian Adams (62)

LOWER MIDCARDERS

Perry Saturn (60)

Akira Taue (52)

Richard Slinger (60)

OPENERS

none

JOBBERS

none

MANAGERS

New Jack (84)

Alicia Shamrock (65)

Vince Russo (83)

Cyrus The Virus (68)

NON-WRESTLERS

Mick Foley (87)

Percy Pringle (73)

Mike Sanders (69)

TAG TEAMS {members} (experience)

Road Warriors {Road Warrior Hawk & Road Warrior Animal} (100)

Kronik {Brian Adams & Bryan Clark} (82)

TITLES (image) {current holder}

NWA World (83) {Jeff Jarrett}

NWA X (79) {TAKA Michinoku}

NWA Tag Team (78) {Road Warriors}

Wednesday, April 30, 2003

As you may remember, this is the day I had to make a decision about the wrestlers that are less than 60 over. The hardest decision involved America’s Most Wanted, who are the only ones this edict covers who were here when I arrived. They survived Bob Armstrong’s roster purge, and even held the Tag Team titles briefly. However, at this time they don’t have the talent or charisma to fit in with our long-term plans. We have many guys in development that are far more talented. Yesterday we said goodbye to them on television, and transitioned their manager, New Jack, into a new program. In addition to Chris Harris and James Storm, also leaving the company today is The Damaja, Invader #1, Joe E. Legend, Scott Vick, Johnny Swinger, Dr. Wagner Jr., Shark Boy, Nathan Jones, Lash LeRoux, Steve Bradley, and Bison Smith.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait tonight’s main event, featuring Bill Goldberg challenging Masato Tanaka!

Kavovit: Last night on XPlosion, New Jack became the manager for the three Hardcore Japanese wrestlers, costing Malice his match against Akira Taue. As a result, Percy Pringle demanded this match for tonight.

Snake: Another one of the Hardcore Japanese wrestlers, Ebessan, will be taking on Sonny Siaki in a X-division match.

Kavovit: Another member of SEX, Disco Inferno, will be taking on Curt Hennig later. But earlier today, we got these words from Sonny Siaki and New Jack with regards to tonight’s Siaki/Ebessan match.

On the video screen, Sonny Siaki runs down Ebessan. He tells us that last night Ebessan proved he wasn’t a challenge for Siaki, since he couldn’t even beat Jody Fleisch. He tells Ebessan to get ready to go back to Japan with his tail between his legs.

OR: 72

The video screen goes black for a moment, and then New Jack appears with Ebessan to the delight of the fans. New Jack admits he don’t know much about this flippity-floppity X division, but he does know that Ebessan can kick Sonny Siaki’s ass. He warns Vince Russo not to get involved, or else he’ll really be forked!

OR: 78

The video screen goes black again, and the camera cuts to the ring, where Ron Killings stands with a microphone. He tells us in a minute he’s going to be facing Perry Saturn. He talks about how versatile Saturn is, competing in Hardcore matches, X-division matches, and even having some fine technical matches. The Truth is that tonight he’s in a X-division match with Killings, and he’s not as good in that style as Killings is.

OR: 90

Ron Killings vs. Perry Saturn: Killings proves himself to be right, as the match starts out fast-paced and Killings controls Saturn. However, Saturn dodges a dropkick and immediately slows down the pace, turning it into a technical match. The fans are fairly quiet, surprised at this turn of events. But they get involved near the end, when Killings hits a jawbreaker to regain the advantage. A very short time later, he hits the Truth Or Consequences for the pin. Afterwards, they shake hands. A nice end to a good match.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 72

CR: 64

MQ: 80

Backstage, Disco Inferno talks trash about Curt Hennig. He tells us that Hennig may be the better wrestler, but he can’t dance anywhere near as good as Disco Inferno.

OR: 84

(Disco Inferno gained in over from 74 to 76.)

The camera finds Hennig watching Disco on the monitor. Wow, somebody’s actually watching this! Hennig points out this won’t be a dancing contest, but a wrestling contest.

OR: 81

Ebessan (with New Jack) vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): A very good match – oh wait, I already said this was a X-division match. Typical of the division, the action is fast and furious, with both men gaining and losing the advantage. Russo is obviously afraid of New Jack, and never even tries to interfere. However, Siaki shows that Russo’s assistance wasn’t necessary. He scores the pin after the Money Clip. New Jack immediately slides into the ring, preventing Siaki from even attempting a beatdown.

Winner: Sonny Siaki

OR: 77

CR: 69

MQ: 86

Backstage, Percy Pringle is in Bill Goldberg’s locker room, and Goldberg is in the background, pacing back and forth. Pringle is laughing, of course. He tells New Jack to get used to losing, because Masato Tanaka will lose just like Ebessan did. Goldberg pushes Pringle aside and tells Tanaka that he’s next.

OR: 68

(Bill Goldberg dropped in over from 88 to 86.)

Meanwhile, Masato Tanaka and Akira Taue are sitting in their dressing room when New Jack comes in, with Ebessan leaning against him. Taue helps Ebessan to the couch, while New Jack walks to Tanaka and slaps him! Then he picks up a chair and hits him over the head! Then he asks Tanaka if he’s ready for Goldberg, and he nods his head. This brings a smile to New Jack’s face.

OR: 80

Curt Hennig vs. Disco Inferno (with Vince Russo): Hennig, the veteran, wisely avoids Russo’s side of the ring as much as possible, and once again Russo isn’t able to help his man. No interviews, no help, I wonder why he even showed up? Disco takes too much time playing to the fans whenever he does get the advantage, which allows Hennig time to recover. In the end, Hennig nails a Hennig Plex for the pin.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 76

CR: 78

MQ: 72

Masato Tanaka (with New Jack) vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Television time is almost out, so you know this is going to be a quick match. Goldberg dominates for three minutes, but when he goes for the Spear, Tanaka moves and Goldberg hits the post. Tanaka goes right for the Roaring Elbow, which puts Goldberg down. Tanaka covers him, and Goldberg doesn’t kick out in time! New Jack pulls Tanaka out of the ring as Goldberg goes nuts, kicking the ropes and punching the turnbuckles. Pringle appears to be going into shock.

Winner: Masato Tanaka

OR: 81

CR: 78

MQ: 85

(Bill Goldberg dropped in over from 86 to 85.)

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 6520

Best segment: Interview with Ron Killings (90)

Worst segment: Interview with Percy Pringle & Bill Goldberg (68)

Best match: Masato Tanaka over Bill Goldberg (81)

Tuesday, April 29, 2003

As our ratings, attendance, and buy rates continue to rise, the industry as a whole continues to fall. All Pro Wrestling, East Coast Wrestling Association, and Heartland Wrestling Association were forced to cancel their last show due to a lack of fan interest. In part, because of this, APW and HWA have fallen to Small level.

I had a meeting yesterday afternoon with Jerry Jarrett and executives from Panda Energy. They’re extremely happy with the ratings and all, but there is something they’re concerned about. They think that some of the wrestlers aren’t getting enough TV time. They point out that Brian Lawler only had one televised match last month. Given that we’re a Global company now, they believe that we should not have anyone on the active roster who is less than 60 over. Given that ultimatum, I have only two options regarding those wrestlers: fire them or send them to development in Japan. I told them to give me a couple of days to evaluate those performers, and I’d get back with them on Wednesday.

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dick Williams and Ahmed Vaughn

Williams: Hello everyone, and welcome to XPlosion! I’m Dick Williams, and joining me is Ahmed Vaughn.

Vaughn: It’s good to be here, Dick, especially with the card that commissioner Foley has put together tonight!

Williams: Last Sunday at April Action, TAKA Michinoku became the new NWA X champion, and his first title defense is tonight against Brian Lawler.

Vaughn: Also, in out main event, Curt Hennig will be taking on Norman Smiley.

Williams: Hennig must still be banged up after the match he and Ron Killings had with Goldberg.

Vaughn: And the former X champ, Jody Fleisch, will be in action, too. Also, we have a sit-down interview with the Shamrocks. It’s the first time they’ve spoken since Alicia was kidnapped by SEX.

Williams: Wait a minute, that’s Konnan’s music, it’s not time for his match yet! Konnan, what are you doing out here?

Konnan: Yo, yo, let me speak on this. Orale! Arriba la raza! You know, everyone be dissing the K-Dogg in the back, like they don’t know who I am and everything I’ve done. First of all, I’m a member of Sports Entertainment Xtreme, and you know what that means. Now, one of the worst is Perry Saturn. Every time I walk past him, he makes faces at me, with his eyeballs going all different directions.

Williams: Wait a minute, Konnan, he can’t control that!

Konnan: Don’t you see that don’t matter! Tonight, Saturn, I’m gonna knock your eyeballs right out of your skull!

OR: 76

Akira Taue vs. Malice (with Percy Pringle): The fans act like they smell a squash. Well, either that or a fresh batch of Papa John’s pizza has arrived at the concession stand. Well, if they were expecting a squash, they must be relatively surprised that Taue holds his own against Malice. However, Malice is too big and strong, and it looks like he’s going to get the win. Suddenly, New Jack’s music plays and he steps through the curtain. He chases Pringle around the ring (although it’s more like the O.J. Simpson chase – not very fast), and Pringle heads through the curtain. Malice yells at New Jack, allowing Taue to sneak up behind him. Dynamic Bomb! Taue scores the surprise pinfall. But now Pringle is back with Bryan Clark and Brian Adams, who attack New Jack from behind. Close on their heels, though, is Ebessan and Masato Tanaka. Pringle isn’t going to get involved, so he realizes that his men are outnumbered four-on-three and calls them back to the locker room.

Winner: Akira Taue

OR: 67

CR: 51

MQ: 83

(Malice dropped in over from 64 to 63. Akira Taue gained in over from 60 to 61.)

New Jack, Tanaka, Taue, and Ebessan come to the announcers’ desk. New Jack explains that both Chris Harris and James Storm were seriously injured last week by Kronik, and they’ll be out of action for a while. Meanwhile, his old friend from ECW, Masato Tanaka, explained to him the troubles he and the other Japanese wrestlers were having in TNA. For example, Ebessan will be fighting Jody Fleisch later tonight. That was supposed to be for the X title, but when Fleisch lost the belt, Ebessan wasn’t shifted to a match with TAKA Michinoku, but was stuck fighting Fleisch with nothing on the line. These three Hardcore Japanese wrestlers asked him to serve as their spokesman, and that’s what he’s going to do.

OR: 82

(Akira Taue gained in over from 61 to 62.)

Perry Saturn vs. Konnan (with Vince Russo): Quick match, dominated by Konnan. In less than four minutes Konnan has the Tequila Sunrise on Saturn, and he taps out.

Winner: Konnan

OR: 71

CR: 65

MQ: 78

As Konnan is about to go backstage, TAKA Michinoku comes out and they high-five. Michinoku and Russo go to the announcers’ desk to talk about TAKA’s title defense. Russo doesn’t think it’s fair that TAKA has to defend his title tonight. His match with Brian Lawler was scheduled before TAKA even won the belt! Russo says it doesn’t really matter because TAKA’s not going to lose to Lawler, anyway.

OR: 79

Jody Fleisch vs. Ebessan (with New Jack): A very good match, both men prove they deserve a X title shot soon. The action is fast and furious for seven minutes, until out of nowhere Jody Fleisch hits a Phoenix 720 DDT for the pin. Afterwards, Fleisch helps Ebessan to his feet, and they shake hands. New Jack nods approvingly.

Winner: Jody Fleisch

OR: 79

CR: 71

MQ: 87

Norman Smiley is backstage talking about his match with Curt Hennig. He says he’s got a lot of respect for Hennig, and he hopes that after Smiley wins they can do a Big Wiggle together. Ew, I don’t think I want to see that!

OR: 69

Meanwhile, in his locker room, Curt Hennig is sporting a black eye courtesy of Bill Goldberg. He talks about how sore he is, but if he has to wrestle tonight he’s glad it’s against Smiley. He expects a good, clean match, and the best man will win.

OR: 78

NWA X title match: Brian Lawler vs. TAKA Michinoku © (with Vince Russo): Another good X-division match, and Lawler surprises many in the audience by matching TAKA move for move. However, some timely assistance from Russo allows TAKA to get the advantage, and a few minutes later he finishes Lawler with the Michinoku Driver.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 79

CR: 72

MQ: 86

(The NWA X title has gained in image from 77 to 79.)

Williams and Vaughn introduce a videotape of the Shamrocks in their home. Alicia talks about how hard SEX was on her while she was their captive. Several times, she seems to be on the verge of breaking down, but Ken hugs her and tells her it will be all right. Finally, she can take no more and starts crying uncontrollably as she runs off. Ken tells the cameraman that he’s gotten some revenge on Disco Inferno, but there are more members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme who will get what’s coming to them for what they did to Alicia.

OR: 92

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 63 to 64. Ken Shamrock gained in over from 86 to 87.)

Norman Smiley vs. Curt Hennig: A disappointing match that just never got in a groove. These two veterans should have been able to have a better match than that. Unfortunately, this is the main event, so we have to let it run the full ten minutes it was scheduled for. At least the fans don’t seem to mind. Finally, Hennig lands a Hennig Plex for the pin. Afterwards, they shake hands. Smiley tries to get Hennig to do a Big Wiggle for the fans, but he just laughs and waves him off.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 70

CR: 71

MQ: 68

OR: 76

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 6520

Best segment: Interview with Ken & Alicia Shamrock (92)

Worst segment: Akira Taue over Malice (67)

Best match: (tie) Jody Fleisch over Ebessan; TAKA Michinoku over Brian Lawler (79)

I'm pretty sure I did. It seems like such a long time ago though.

←

Yep. I haven't played with it any at all since EWR 4.0 came out nearly a year ago. My plan was to eventually convert it to version 4.0 (like I converted it from 2.0 to 3.0 in the middle of the game), but I got started on other projects and never finihed up the month I was in. But I'm gonna do it this time. Who knows, I might even keep playing it in 3.0 for a while after that as well.

Sunday, April 27, 2003

I’m really hyped up about tonight’s pay-per-view. Hopefully, within the next week, we’ll get word as to whether or not we’ll get a new television deal on a major network. Some of these matches have a few weeks of buildup, and others just a few days, but hopefully the matches – and the crowd – will live up to expectations.

Before the show even goes on the air, Disco Inferno dances his way to the announcers’ desk. He tells everyone how much fun he had with Alicia, and he hopes she’s told Ken Shamrock every last detail of her visit with SEX. The crowd totally despises him after what he did to her.

OR: 75

TNA April Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and this is April Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait tonight’s show!

Kavovit: We have six big matches tonight, and any of them could be the main event in any arena in the world! All three titles will be on the line tonight.

Snake: And in the other matches, something bigger is on the line – revenge.

Kavovit: But let’s get tonight’s show started with a Tag Team title match.

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. Kronik (with Percy Pringle): If you’re looking for high-flying action, that’s coming up later. This one is a knock-down, drag-out brawl. The referee has a hard time keeping only the legal men in the ring, and quite frequently all four men are in the ring at the same time. Pringle tries to give his team the advantage by tossing a pair of brass knuckles to Bryan Clark, but his aim is a little off. The knux go over Clark’s head and into Animal’s hand. Clark turns around and gets nailed with the knux. All this time, the referee is trying to get Hawk and Brian Adams out of the ring, since they aren’t the legal men. Animal tosses the brass knuckles out of the ring, calls for the referee, and makes the pin. However, Clark doesn’t stay down for long, and all four men brawl out of the ring, through the curtain, and into the backstage area.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 79

CR: 75

MQ: 84

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 76 to 78.)

Ken Shamrock (with Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock) vs. Disco Inferno (with Vince Russo): Disco is already in the ring when Ken Shamrock walks through the curtains. He spots Disco and snaps. He slides in the ring, and Disco slides out the other side. Ken Shamrock chases Disco all the way around the ring until Disco grabs Alicia and pulls her in front of him, using her as a shield. Shamrock hollers, puzzled by his dilemma. His solution: grab Vince Russo and start beating the hell out of him. Hey, can’t argue with that logic. However, it does allow Disco to attack Shamrock from behind and control the first few minutes of the match. Disco goes for the Village People’s Elbow … but Ken Shamrock counters by grabbing Disco’s leg and applying the Ankle Lock! Disco taps out, but Ken won’t release the hold. Disco screams in agony, and Russo waves towards the locker room. Finally, B.G. James, Sonny Siaki, Rick Steiner, TAKA Michinoku, and Konnan come out to save their cohort in Sports Entertainment Xtreme.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 79

CR: 76

MQ: 83

NWA X title match: Jody Fleisch © vs. TAKA Michinoku (with Vince Russo): Since TAKA’s already in the ring, Jody Fleisch’s music plays, and he’s ready to start their match. The other members of SEX help Disco Inferno back to the locker room, leaving Michinoku and Russo. What follows is a great match. Both men are in top form, and everything seems to click. The fans are really into it, too, which helps both men take it up another notch. Fleisch gets TAKA down, and climbs to the top rope for a Missile Dropkick. Vince Russo is on the wrong side of the ring, not in position to interfere. However, he shows off a new trick: he picks up a chair and hits the top rope with it as hard as he can. The shock wave travels around the ring, and the vibration causes Fleisch to lose his balance, and he gets crotched on the turnbuckle. Michinoku recovers, and delivers a Michinoku Driver for the pinfall.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 86

CR: 81

MQ: 92

(The NWA X title has gained in image from 71 to 77.)

Backstage, Sting says on Wednesday night he got revenge for the parking-lot attack on B.G. James, and now it’s time to extract revenge on Marcus Bagwell. Then he asks the Lord to forgive him for what he is about to do.

OR: 97

(Sting gained in over from 96 to 98.)

Sting vs. Marcus Bagwell (with Vince Russo): This is probably the shortest match of the night, which is probably a good thing because it’s not a very good match. However, the fans really pop for Sting, so in the end it’s not too bad. After a couple of Stinger Splashes, Sting locks in the Scorpion Deathlock, and Bagwell taps out.

Winner: Sting

OR: 83

CR: 88

MQ: 73

Backstage, Ron Killings and Curt Hennig talk about their matches with Bill Goldberg over the last couple of weeks. Both point out that Goldberg is a very good wrestler, but Hennig points out that he’s not perfect, and Killings says The Truth is that Goldberg can’t beat both Hennig and Killings at the same time. I guess we’ll see about that.

OR: 90

Handicap match: Ron Killings & Curt Hennig vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Even though all three men have a well-earned reputation with the crowd, the match itself is a total clash of styles. Goldberg is a brawler, while Hennig is a technical wrestler and Killings is a high-flyer. But like in the previous match, the crowd reaction make the match work out OK. Hennig and Killings control, as you would expect, but they make one big mistake. They whip Goldberg into the corner, and then Hennig tries to whip Killings in for a Clothesline, but Goldberg ducks Killings’ attempt and Spears Hennig! He then turns around and Spears Killings on the rebound! Goldberg seems indecisive about which one to Jackhammer, but Pringle tells him to get both, so he does. He them pins them both at the same time for the win.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 82

CR: 86

MQ: 75

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): Kavovit and Snake wonder how much champagne Hall has drank during TAKA’s victory celebration. Judging by the way Russo’s staggering around, I’m wondering the same thing about him. Much like last month, Jarrett controls for most of the match, and Hall falls victim to a Superplex for the pin. Good match with even better fan response, but I think it will be a while before Hall gets another title shot.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 84

CR: 87

MQ: 80

(The NWA World title has gained in image from 81 to 83.)

OR: 84

Buy rate: 1.33

Attendance: 14587

Best segment: Interview with Sting (97)

Worst segment: Interview with Disco Inferno (75)

Best match: TAKA Michinoku over Jody Fleisch (86)

I'm glad to see this diary back. I enjoyed reading it.

←

Glad to have you back. I seem to recall you winning a PPV prediction or two back in the day.

Wednesday, April 23, 2003

Scott Hall showed up late again yesterday – that’s why he didn’t get an interview before his match. That’s why we had to improvise the Hardcore tag match, to fill time until Hall finally arrived. Remind me after Sunday to not book Hall in any more important storylines. That way, I can suspend him without affecting any storylines.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait tonight’s main event, featuring Ron Killings taking on Bill Goldberg!

Kavovit: Last night on XPlosion, commissioner Mick Foley made that match for tonight. Also, Ron Killings lost his X title shot to TAKA Michinoku.

Snake: Michinoku will face Jody Fleisch for the X title this Sunday at April Action. Other matches confirmed last night include Scott Hall challenging Jeff Jarrett for the World title again this month, and Kronik gets a World title match with the Road Warriors.

Kavovit: That is, if the Road Warriors are still the champions after tonight. Hawk and Animal will be defending their titles tonight against two members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme, and Kronik has been barred from the building. Also yesterday, we learned that Alicia is safely at home with her husband, Ken Shamrock, and he’ll be out for revenge against Disco Inferno this Sunday.

Snake: If there’s two things you don’t ever mess with, it’s one’s money and one’s family, and SEX violated that rule.

Kavovit: A third rule may very well be don’t jump Sting in the parking lot, but that’s exactly what happened earlier today. Let’s take a look.

On the video screen, footage from a camcorder hiding in the bushes near the parking lot of the TNA Asylum shows a car pull up, and Sting gets out. As he is getting his bags out of the trunk, B.G. James and Marcus Bagwell attack out of nowhere. They continually punch him for about a minute before tossing him into the trunk of his own car and shutting the lid. By that time, the camera operator has made his way over from the bushes, and Vince Russo’s voice is heard congratulating the two.

OR: 85

(Marcus Bagwell gained in over from 75 to 78.)

Invader #1 vs. Bison Smith: The fans welcome both men with apathy. Decent match, but the silence in the building is deafening. Smith dominates Invader #1 in this fairly short match, finishing him with the Colorado Stampede for the pin.

Winner: Bison Smith

OR: 65

CR: 53

MQ: 78

Backstage, Vince Russo is standing outside the SEX locker room, talking smack about the Road Warriors. He says it doesn’t really matter who faces them, because Hawk and Animal are in for a beating. He opens the door to the dressing room and asks for any two men who want to kick some ass to come out. The first two men out the door are Rick Steiner and Marcus Bagwell, so Russo gladly informs them that they’ve got a Tag Team title match tonight.

OR: 83

(Rick Steiner gained in over from 63 to 64.)

Perry Saturn vs. Steve Bradley: A good match, but once again the fans are silent. It’s a good thing I’m getting a cut of the concessions, because these first two matches have sent the fans out to the concession area. Saturn controls for most of the match, and eventually gets Bradley to tap out to the Rings Of Saturn.

Winner: Perry Saturn

OR: 70

CR: 57

MQ: 83

As the referee helps Bradley to the back, Sting walks out to the announcers’ desk. He’s hot, and he wants SEX tonight! He understands that Bagwell is already scheduled in a match, so he challenges B.G. James to face him later tonight, and Bagwell to face him this Sunday.

OR: 97

(Sting gained in over from 94 to 96.)

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. Marcus Bagwell & Rick Steiner (with Vince Russo): It seems like nothing can stop the Road Warriors, as they run right through Steiner and Bagwell. Kavovit and Snake remind us that Kronik isn’t here because commissioner Foley banned them from the building, but it doesn’t seem to matter. It’s over in less than five minutes, as Animal pins Steiner after a Doomsday Device. Suddenly Malice runs in with a chair, but still it’s two-on-one as Russo gets his guys out of the ring. Hawk and Animal begin to destroy Malice as Percy Pringle comes out from the locker room, and quickly he quits laughing. After receiving three Doomsday Devices, Hawk points to Pringle and tells him that this is a message to Kronik.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 77

CR: 76

MQ: 78

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 74 to 76.)

The camera cuts to Bill Goldberg’s locker room, where he’s already pacing back and forth when Percy Pringle arrives, out of breath. Goldberg asks how it went, and Pringle tells him not to concern himself with it, and he needs to focus on Ron Killings. Goldberg responds by slamming his fist on the table, breaking it in two.

OR: 71

(Bill Goldberg dropped in over from 90 to 88.)

Meanwhile, Ron Killings tells us how upset he is at losing his shot at the X title, and he’s looking to take out some anger tonight. He tells Goldberg that there wasn’t any need to continue beating his good friend Curt Hennig after their match last week, so he’s glad he’s got this opportunity to teach him some manners. The Truth about Goldberg: well, Killings just points out he doesn’t need some fat tub of lard to do his talking for him like Goldberg does.

OR: 90

Sting vs. B.G. James (with Vince Russo): If the last match didn’t get the fans to start caring, this one definitely does. However, it’s not much longer than any of the other matches tonight. It takes about eight minutes for Sting to get James to tap out to the Scorpion Deathlock. As Sting leaves the ring, he looks into the camera and tells Bagwell that he’ll see him Sunday.

Winner: Sting

OR: 81

CR: 85

MQ: 75

Ron Killings vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Killings surprises Goldberg with his speed, and gets the advantage for the early part of the match. However, like last week, Goldberg’s size and strength advantage are too much for Killings to overcome for very long. Goldberg reverses an Irish Whip, and then hits Killings with a Spear. The referee counts the pin, but then Goldberg picks Killings up. As he begins to inflict more damage, Curt Hennig comes out of the back. Goldberg turns around, and received a kick to the gut. Hennig Plex! The fans count to three before Hennig releases the hold, and Goldberg rolls out of the ring.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 84

CR: 87

MQ: 79

Hennig calls for a microphone as Killings struggles to his feet and Pringle pulls Goldberg toward the locker room.

Hennig: Hey, Baldie! Last week you got lucky, and as I showed you a minute ago, it doesn’t take much to pin you.

Killings: Hey Curt – that Hennig Plex was absolutely perfect!

Hennig: Well, thanks, Ron. And if I may steal one of your lines, The Truth is that you got lucky last week, and you got lucky again this week. Do you want to push your luck, and face both of us this Sunday at April Action?

Pringle shakes his head no, but Goldberg nods his head yes and yells “You’re on!”

Killings: Then that’s the match, and The Truth is you can’t beat both of us by yourself.

OR: 86

OR: 81

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 6021

Best segment: Interview with Sting (97)

Worst segment: Bison Smith over Invader #1 (65)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Ron Killings (84)

Tuesday, April 22, 2003

After Wednesday’s show, Konnan came to me and complained about Road Warrior Hawk working too stiff in their match. I told him I’d talk with Hawk about it. That’s two complaints in two and a half months; I might actually have to do have that talk with him if it happens again. Also, Bill Goldberg told me he thought he should be moved up the card. I pointed out that he just main-evented a TV show, how much higher did he think he could go?

I guess my success with NWA: TNA during this time when the industry is in a downturn is being noticed by other promoters. On Sunday, Ron Rivera of Revolution Pro Wrestling offered to give me full control of his promotion. However, they are at a Small level and are nearly $200,000 in the hole. Their top star is former TNA wrestler Slash, so that ought to tell you all you need to know about that company. Needless to say, I turned him down.

Another sign of how bad the industry is slumping was seen when Border City Wrestling had their weekly television show canceled. It was one of the lowest-rated wrestling shows, a title that now falls to Ring Of Honor’s High Impact TV.

We’re now less than a week from April Action, so it’s time to start finalizing matches for Sunday.

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dick Williams and Ahmed Vaughn

Williams: Hello everyone, and welcome to XPlosion! I’m Dick Williams, and joining me is Ahmed Vaughn.

Vaughn: It’s good to be here, Dick, especially with the card that commissioner Foley has put together tonight!

Williams: As we saw last Wednesday on Total Nonstop Action, Foley has scheduled a Hardcore match between Masato Tanaka and Scott Hall, and if Hall wins he gets a World title match against Jeff Jarrett.

Vaughn: Also, don’t forget that TAKA Michinoku from Sports Entertainment Xtreme will be challenging Ron Killings for his X title shot at April Action.

Williams: Three weeks ago on this program, Killings won the right to challenge Jody Fleisch for the X title at April Action, and Michinoku was one of the men he eliminated to win.

Vaughn: But now, let’s head to the ring for our first match of the night!

Ebessan vs. Richard Slinger: The fans finally seem to be warming up to the newcomers, as this match gets more reaction from the crowd than any this month that hasn’t featured a TNA veteran. A decent match, as both men brawl a lot. Finally, it’s Ebessan who gains the upper hand, then scored the pinfall after a Senton Bomb.

Winner: Ebessan

OR: 69

CR: 61

MQ: 78

As the ring crew starts preparing the ringside area for the Hardcore match, commissioner Foley walks out to the announcers’ desk and picks up a microphone.

Foley: Thank you. It’s good to be back in the TNA Asylum, right here in Nashville! The reason I came out here is that I wanted to give you an update on Alicia. Apparently, Sports Entertainment Xtreme released her sometime this past weekend, and she and Ken Shamrock are at home. Alicia wasn’t hurt physically, but who knows what her mental state is like. But I can tell you what Ken Shamrock’s mental state is. I just got off the phone with him, and he practically demanded a match against Disco Inferno this Sunday at April Action. Given the circumstances, I agreed that the match should take place, and I reserve the right to add any stipulations I deem necessary. Thank you.

Before Foley can leave, Percy Pringle’s music plays, and he waddles out to the announcers’ desk as well.

Foley: I see something’s on your mind, Percy. What can I do for you?

Pringle: Last Wednesday, you and Vince Russo made a long list of matches. However, I don’t recall hearing you make a Tag Title match for April Action.

Foley: No, I haven’t made a Tag title match yet. The Road Warriors have asked me to make a match against Kronik, but I don’t recall Kronik ever being in a tag match here in TNA, so I don’t think they deserve a title match.

Pringle: What if Kronik “proved” themselves to you tonight? I know you’ve got Scott Hall in a match to “prove” himself.

Foley: Let me guess: you’ve already got a match in mind.

Pringle: You bet I do! You know that America’s Most Wanted has been a thorn in my side for more than a month. I see that you’ve already got the ring prepared for a Hardcore match, so how about right now we have a Hardcore match between America’s Most Wanted and Kronik, and if Kronik wins they get a Tag title shot this Sunday?

Foley: I’ll make that match, with the stipulation that whichever team wins gets a title shot. Does that sound fair to you?

Pringle: That’s fine with me. But I have one more issue before I leave. After Ron Killings interfered in Goldberg’s match last week, he really wants to get his hands on him.

Foley: Well, Killings already had a match tonight.

Pringle: Then make the match for tomorrow!

Foley: Allright, I’ll tell you what. You keep Goldberg out of Killings’ match tonight, and he’s all yours tomorrow.

With that, Pringle starts laughing and walks off.

OR: 83

(Percy Pringle gained in over from 71 to 73.)

Hardcore match, winner gets a Tag Team title match: America’s Most Wanted (with New Jack) vs. Kronik (with Percy Pringle): Good Hardcore match, but the fans aren’t very excited. Sure, they’ve seen Kronik before, but this is the first time they’ve been in a regular 2-on-2 tag match, and the crowd doesn’t know what to expect. Well, it’s a Hardcore match, so they should expect the usual – chairs, street signs, trashcans, and the ever-present fire extinguisher. All these items are used, including the table New Jack sets up at ringside. Humorous moment: New Jack tosses an apple and a pear to Chris Harris, who smashes them on Brian Adams’ head. New Jack declares that to be the “Fruit Punch.” However, that’s pretty much it for AMW, and Kronik dominates them for several minutes. It’s clear to everyone that Kronik could make the pin anytime they wanted, but they don’t want to. Finally, New Jack gets in the ring, but even he can’t stop the destruction. In fact, he’s the recipient of the first High Times of the night, which draws a deep laugh from Pringle. Harris, and Storm are beaten, bloodied, and bruised, and have received the High Times on all sorts of objects before finally Pringle tells Bryan Clark to cover James Storm, and the referee gladly counts to three.

Winner: Kronik

OR: 67

CR: 54

MQ: 81

Vince Russo is standing outside the SEX locker room with TAKA Michinoku. He calls Killings’ win in the Battle Royal a fluke, and reminds us that there’s no over-the-top-rope rule tonight. Russo predicts a win for TAKA Michinoku tonight, and another one for the title this Sunday. Then the door of the locker room opens and Hall walks out. Russo asks if he’s ready, and they walk off, leaving TAKA alone with the cameraman. He says some stuff in Japanese and makes Hulk Hogan poses while the crowd laughs at him.

OR: 83

Meanwhile, Ron Killings talks about his match with TAKA Michinoku. He’s determined to keep his title shot, and there’s no way he’s going to give it up. The Truth about TAKA Michinoku: he should stick to midget matches. Oh, that’s just cold.

OR: 91

(Ron Killings gained in over from 81 to 85.)

Hardcore match: Masato Tanaka vs. Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): Despite the stipulation, it starts out as a regular match. I guess with all the trashcans being flattened after the earlier match, it kind of takes all the fun out of using them. Hall heads to the floor, and Tanaka foolishly follows him. Hall grabs a chair and nails Tanaka on the head, but it seemingly has no effect! He hits him again, but nothing happens! Finally, after a third chairshot, Tanaka finally falls down. Hall goes for the pin on the floor, which is legal since it’s a Hardcore match, but Tanaka kicks out. While they brawl on the floor, Russo is in the ring setting up a table. By the time both men are back in the ring, Hall is pretty firmly in control, and he gives Tanaka an Outsider’s Edge through the table for the pin.

Winner: Scott Hall

OR: 83

CR: 80

MQ: 87

While the referees and road agents get all the Hardcore paraphernalia out of the ring, a video highlighting this month’s X-division matches plays on the video screen. The crowd really pops for Ron Killings winning the Battle Royal and Jody Fleisch pinning Sonny Siaki last week.

OR: 100

(Jody Fleisch gained in over from 82 to 86. Ron Killings gained in over from 85 to 89.)

X division No. 1 Contender’s match: Ron Killings vs. TAKA Michinoku (with Vince Russo): A good match, but not up to the standards these two are capable of. Both men take turns controlling the match, with neither really gaining enough of an advantage to successfully pin the other. That changes when Sonny Siaki sneaks out to ringside with a chair. TAKA pushes Killings into the ropes, and Siaki nails him with the chair! TAKA rolls him up, and the referee, who never saw Siaki, counts the pin. Siaki slides into the ring and, along with TAKA, starts putting the boots to Killings. It doesn’t last very long before Jody Fleisch hits the ring, and SEX retreats to the locker room.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 84

CR: 83

MQ: 85

OR: 82

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 6035

Best segment: X-division video featuring Jody Fleisch & Ron Killings (100)

Worst segment: Kronik over America’s Most Wanted (67)

Best match: TAKA Michinoku over Ron Killings (84)

Wednesday, April 16, 2003

For it to be the biggest and most star-studded edition of XPlosion in the show’s history, it was fairly disappointing. Vince Russo and Jody Fleisch both dropped in over, and the Fleisch/Sonny Siaki match was the only one that was any good.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait tonight’s main event, featuring Curt Hennig taking on Bill Goldberg!

Kavovit: They’re two of the biggest names in wrestling.

Snake: Oh, no, here comes Vince Russo! Hello Vince! Remember, you can’t touch us!

Russo: Oh, please, I’m not concerned with you. Did you see XPlosion last night? Did you see what I saw? Jeff Jarrett defending his World title against Michael Modest. Who the fuck is Michael Modest?

Kavovit: Hey, watch your language!

Russo: I’ll say whatever the hell I want to say, dammit! My point is this: Last week on this program, Scott Hall pinned Sting in the middle of the ring. Tell me, shouldn’t that make him the No. 1 contender?

Snake: Well, some might say that …

Russo: I’ll tell you what, why don’t you get commissioner Foley out here to explain why Modest got the title shot and not Hall. I know he’s sitting back there in his office sticking sock puppets down his sweatpants, probably because that’s the only thing he can put down there that won’t fight back! He …

With that, Foley’s music hits, and he joins Kavovit, Snake, and Russo at the announcers’ desk.

Russo: Go ahead, Mick. Tell everyone why Modest got the title shot. What’s the matter, Mick? Are you afraid of SEX?

Foley: Modest got the shot because Jarrett asked for a match against him. And if I remember right, didn’t Hall get beat by Jarrett at Spring Slam a few weeks ago?

Russo: Yeah, but Hall beat Sting! Why don’t you make the match for tonight, Hall vs. Jarrett for the title?

Foley: First of all, you know Jarrett is in Puerto Rico defending the NWA World title. He’s not here tonight, so I couldn’t give you that match. But I’m not so sure that I think Scott Hall is the top contender for Jarrett’s belt.

Russo: What? Are you out of your mind?

Foley: OK, Vince, I’ll tell you what. Next week on XPlosion, I’ll put Scott Hall in a match, and if he wins, I’ll give him another title match against Jarrett at April Action.

Russo: Fine, no problem.

Foley: His opponent Tuesday night will be none other than Masato Tanaka!

Russo: What?

Foley: Oh, and it’ll be a Hardcore match!

Russo: You can’t do that! It’s not fair!

Foley: Oh, I just did do that! And now, for tonight. Yesterday, when you and all the other members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme attacked Masato Tanaka, I noticed Konnan and B.G. James holding him up so you could slap them. Tonight they’re going to get slapped back. You see, I’ve scheduled them in a match tonight against the Road Warriors! And if any member of SEX interferes, you all will be suspended, without pay, for one year!

Russo: Dammit, Mick, you can’t do that!

Foley: I just did!

Russo: Well at least make it a Tag Team title match. I’d say that’s certainly more than fair.

Foley: I’ll have to check with Hawk and Animal, but I’m sure they’ll agree to it. Also for tonight, you keep talking about Hall beating Sting, Hall beating Sting – I’m sure Sting would like the opportunity to set things straight after last week, so how about tonight we make a match between Sting and, say, Rick Steiner?

Russo: You’re on! While you’re at it, why don’t you go ahead and make Sonny Siaki fight Jody Fleisch in a X title match?

Foley: What, do you think I’m stupid? Fleisch has beaten Siaki twice in a row, so I don’t think we need to see Siaki get his ass handed to him for a third consecutive time by Mr. Fleisch.

Russo: Well, what about TAKA Michinoku? Make him fight Fleisch!

Foley: I gave TAKA a chance to earn a title shot in the X-division Battle Royal, and he lost. So sorry, the answer is no.

Russo: Then dammit, Mick, have TAKA fight Ron Killings for the title shot at April Action!

Foley: Hmm … I think something along those lines can be worked up for XPlosion.

Suddenly, the camera spots a beautiful woman poking her head through the curtains from backstage. Foley notices it, too.

Foley: Now, uh, if you’ll excuse me, I have some important work waiting for me in my office. God, how I love the commissionary position!

OR: 77

On the video screen, a music video featuring Jody Fleisch is shown. It is extremely well produced, with shots of Fleisch hitting high spots timed perfectly with the music.

OR: 95

(Jody Fleisch gained in over from 79 to 82.)

The cameras cut backstage to the vending area. Alicia Shamrock is seen peeking around the corner before walking to the soda machine, relieved that no one is there. She gets a soft drink and turns around, and there stands Disco Inferno, Marcus Bagwell, Sonny Siaki, and TAKA Michinoku.

Disco: I never got an answer from you about those dancing lessons.

Alicia: The answer is no.

Disco: Oh, I’m sorry, that’s the wrong answer. Mister Siaki, will you escort her to our locker room?

Siaki: It will be my pleasure.

With that, the four members of SEX pick Alicia up and carry her away, kicking and screaming. As they walk off, the camera focuses on the can of soda Alicia dropped.

OR: 88

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 62 to 63.)

Anthony Durante vs. Scott Vick: These two have the misfortune of having to follow perhaps the most controversial segment in the history of TNA. Kavovit and Snake spend most of the match wondering if Ken Shamrock has been alerted of what happened to his wife, and expressing their concern for Alicia’s safety. The match itself is pretty decent, but the fans, like the announcers, are distracted. Durante gets the pin after a Super Bomb.

Winner: Anthony Durante

OR: 66

CR: 53

MQ: 79

Backstage, Vince Russo and Rick Steiner are standing in front of Sports Entertainment Xtreme’s dressing room. Russo says that Steiner will prove that Sting really isn’t as good as everyone says. Scott Hall proved that Sting’s not invulnerable last week, and Steiner will prove it again this week. Steiner barks a couple of times, and then Russo leads him into the locker room. As the door is closing, the camera catches a shot of Alicia inside, bound and gagged.

OR: 75

In another part of the building, Sting says that the only thing Scott Hall proved last week was that he needed a chair to beat him. He tells us that Rick Steiner will need all the foreign objects he can get his hands on if he has any hope of beating Sting tonight.

OR: 93

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. B.G. James & Konnan: James and Konnan are accompanied by Russo, but the referee sends him to the back. Kavovit and Snake remind us that no member of SEX can interfere, and if they do they’ll be suspended without pay for a year. The announcers actually talk about what’s going on in this match, as well as throwing in speculation about what is happening to Alicia in the SEX dressing room. Another good match, and the crowd is actually into it. The crowd really gets loud when Animal lifts James up for a Doomsday Device. After hitting the move, Hawk knocks Konnan off the apron to prevent him from breaking up the pin. As the Road Warriors celebrate, Kronik comes running in to deliver another beatdown of the Road Warriors, much like last week. High Times on Hawk! High Times on Animal! Percy Pringle appears from the back, laughing, and waves his boys off. Once again, the Road Warriors are left lying in the ring.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 80

CR: 81

MQ: 79

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 72 to 74.)

The camera cuts to Bill Goldberg’s locker room, where he’s pacing back and forth. From time to time he headbutts the wall as he gets himself psyched up for his match later tonight. Percy Pringle walks in, out of breath from the long 50-foot walk from the ringside area. Pringle asks Goldberg if he’s ready to rip into Curt Hennig, and Goldberg replies by grabbing the door to the bathroom and ripping it off its hinges! Pringle gives us another belly laugh.

OR: 76

Meanwhile, Curt Hennig is standing by just outside his locker room. He tells us that tonight he’s going to give Goldberg his first wrestling lesson in a long time. Tonight’s lesson: how to give a larger man a Hennig Plex. Hennig suddenly turns to his right, where Ken Shamrock is staring intensely at him. Shamrock demands to know if Hennig has seen SEX, and Hennig silently points him on further down the hall. As Shamrock walks away, Hennig just shakes his head.

OR: 79

Sting vs. Rick Steiner (with Vince Russo): A fairly disappointing match. These two are capable of much better. Sting is focused on this match after losing last week, and that is fairly obvious when it takes him just under five minutes to get Steiner set up for the Scorpion Deathlock. Steiner holds out longer than most, but the pain in his back grows so much that he has no choice but to tap out. Russo slaps the ring apron in disgust as Sting releases the hold. The curtain opens, and there stands Ken Shamrock. Russo’s eye bug out, and he takes off through the crowd. Sting has his back turned and doesn’t see Shamrock, but he notices Russo taking off. By the time he does turn around, Shamrock is already in the ring and has the Ankle Lock cinched in on Rick Steiner. Sting tries to pry him off Steiner, and Shamrock lets go long enough to shove Sting away before reapplying the hold. Sting walks off in disgust as all the referees and road agents rush the ring and eventually get Shamrock to let go.

Winner: Sting

OR: 75

CR: 76

MQ: 75

Curt Hennig vs. Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Surprisingly, Hennig controls the match for the first several minutes. Hennig uses several of the tricks only a veteran would know to keep in command. However, Goldberg is just too big and strong. When he does go on the offensive, it’s all over from there. Goldberg scores the pin after a Jackhammer. However, Pringle signals for the attack to continue, and it does until Ron Killings comes out to save Hennig. The announcers remind us of the respect these two have for each other after their series of matches last month. Goldberg gets the best of Killings too, but Hennig recovers, and after they hit a Double Clothesline on Goldberg, he rolls out of the ring, and Pringle pulls him backstage as Killings and Hennig encourage him to return. After Goldberg and Pringle leave, they high-five and hug each other.

Winner: Bill Goldberg

OR: 81

CR: 86

MQ: 72

OR: 80

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 5040

Best segment: Music video featuring Jody Fleisch (95)

Worst segment: Anthony Durante over Scott Vick (66)

Best match: Bill Goldberg over Curt Hennig (81)

Tuesday, April 15, 2003

After two trouble-free months, Scott Hall got involved in a fight backstage at our house show Friday night. Unfortunately, the plans are already in motion for him this month, so I have to give him a free pass this time. I mean, I just had Sting job to him, for crying out loud!

All of the talent I acquired when I bought out PWI and WWA that are on the active roster have appeared on TV, except for one. Tonight, he finally gets his chance. Tonight’s XPlosion is historic for many reasons other than that. Not only will this be the first time the World title has been defended on XPlosion, this will be the first time Jeff Jarrett has even wrestled on the show!

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dick Williams and Ahmed Vaughn

Williams: Hello everyone, and welcome to XPlosion! I’m Dick Williams, and joining me is Ahmed Vaughn.

Vaughn: It’s good to be here, Dick, especially with the card that commissioner Foley has put together tonight!

Williams: Tonight we have a World title match! Yes, fans, Jeff Jarrett will be in action against Michael Modest in our main event.

Vaughn: That ought to be good, but I’m a little nervous, because I saw SEX here earlier today.

Williams: Well, that’s no surprise. Marcus Bagwell is in action tonight, and where you see one member of Sports Entertainment Xtreme, the rest are probably hiding in the bushes nearby. And also tonight we have …

Vaughn: Wait a minute, Dick, I’ve just received word that there’s a commotion in the commissioner’s office? Do we have a camera crew there?

The cameras cut to just outside Mick Foley’s office, and shouting is heard inside. The cameraman opens the door and sees Jody Fleisch yelling at Foley. Wow, that’s as animated as he’s been the whole time he’s been in TNA. Foley just sits there, letting him rant and rave. Basically, he’s saying that if Sonny Siaki wanted a shot at the X title, he would have gladly given it to him. Finally, Foley raises his hand, and Fleisch finally shuts up. Foley tells him that he’s going to make both sides happy by making a X title match tonight, right here in Nashville (thumbs up, cheap pop) between Fleisch and Siaki. Fleisch nods, pushes the cameraman out of his way, and leaves the office. Foley looks at the camera and shrugs.

OR: 74

Shark Boy vs. Johnny Swinger: I think this is the first televised match for both men since their appearance in the X division Battle Royal. But that was two weeks ago, and the fans could care less about either. Oh, sure, they laugh at Shark Boy’s costume, but that’s about it. After five minutes, Swinger hits the Swing Thing for the pin.

Winner: Johnny Swinger

OR: 62

CR: 46

MQ: 78

Some new music hits, and Norman Smiley makes his first appearance on TNA television! In a couple of minutes he’ll be taking on Joe E. Legend. His name may be Legend, but Smiley claims to be even more of a legend. After tonight, Smiley will take his name, and everyone will have to call him just Joe.

OR: 69

Norman Smiley vs. Joe E. Legend: Several of the fans remember Smiley from his days in WCW, but they’re in the minority. This match never really clicks between these two, and the fans let them know it. Finally, Smiley locks in the Norman Conquest, and Legend submits.

Winner: Norman Smiley

OR: 64

CR: 55

MQ: 73

Sonny Siaki is backstage with Vince Russo. Siaki says that Fleisch didn’t have any business interfering in his match with Ron Killings last week, and he’s glad commissioner Foley made the match for tonight. Russo chips in that it’s a title match, and Siaki says it will just make it that much better when he pins Fleisch to regain his belt.

OR: 73

Masato Tanaka vs. Marcus Bagwell (with Vince Russo): Just having Russo at ringside draws more of a reaction from the crowd than either of the first two matches. This was probably as good a match as you’ll see with Bagwell involved. Tanaka signals for the Roaring Elbow, and Russo is on the wrong side of the ring to trip him up. The Roaring Elbow connects, and Bagwell is down for the three count.

Winner: Masato Tanaka

OR: 76

CR: 73

MQ: 79

Russo waves to the locker room, and suddenly the other seven members of SEX hit the ring for a beatdown of Masato Tanaka. Actually, Tanaka holds his own through the first wave, but eventually the numbers just overwhelm him. B.G. James and Konnan hold Takana so Russo can get a couple of cheap shots. Russo yells something about Tanaka getting what he deserves before they all leave the ring.

OR: 67

(Vince Russo dropped in over from 85 to 83.)

Backstage, Michael Modest brags about how he’s going to beat Jeff Jarrett for the World title. Gee, that doesn’t sound very modest.

OR: 66

Meanwhile, in his locker room, Jeff Jarrett talks about how he’s got to show all these wrestlers who came here from other promotions why he’s the World champ, and he’s going to start tonight with that loudmouth Michael Modest.

OR: 81

NWA X title match: Jody Fleisch © vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): Fleisch has been around long enough to know all of Russo’s tricks, which goes a long way to nullifying any attempted cheating on his part. Much like Spring Slam, without Russo’s help it’s clear that Fleisch is the better wrestler. The crowd expects a Phoenix 720 DDT, but instead Fleisch nails Siaki with a Super Kick for the pin. Again, Russo waives in the rest of SEX, but Fleisch takes off before they can get their hands on him. Great match.

Winner: Jody Fleisch

OR: 83

CR: 77

MQ: 90

(Jody Fleisch dropped in over from 81 to 79. The NWA X title gained in image from 71 to 73.)

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Michael Modest: A surprisingly disappointing match, but don’t forget that this is the first time these two have worked with each other. Jarrett controls most of the match, eventually nailing the Stroke for the pin.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 76

CR: 75

MQ: 78

OR: 72

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 5020

Best segment: Jody Fleisch over Sonny Siaki (83)

Worst segment: Johnny Swinger over Shark Boy (62)

Best match: Jody Fleisch over Sonny Siaki (83)

Wednesday, April 9, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to see you.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. I can’t wait tonight’s show, because we’ve got a Tag Team title match!

Kavovit: Malice and Bill Goldberg will be taking on the Road Warriors for the belts, but more importantly, Percy Pringle says that he’s so sure Malice and Goldberg are unstoppable, if they don’t win he’s going to split up the team!

Snake: Well, no one’s come close to stopping them. Tag matches, Hardcore matches, Handicap matches – it doesn’t matter to them.

Kavovit: Also, don’t forget that Pringle still has Brian Adams and Bryan Clark in reserve.

Snake: You know, Steven, I’ve been looking over the format for the show, and you what I see? More specifically, what I don’t see?

Kavovit: What’s that, Bart?

Snake: I don’t see SEX! I know they’re in the building, but commissioner Foley doesn’t have them scheduled for action.

Kavovit: If I know Sports Entertainment Xtreme, they’ll find some way to get involved. But right now, here comes one of the many newcomers to TNA, Lash LeRoux. Lash, in a few minutes, you’ll be taking in Dr. Wagner Jr. What are your thoughts on that match?

LeRoux: Hoooooweee! Ya know, Steven, I come from the bayou. I’ve met several witch doctors, and I don’t know a datgum thing about ‘em.

Snake: Wait a minute, Wagner’s not a …

LeRoux: But let me tell you something I do know – dey ain’t no doctors like I be knowin’. Now, I saw this here Wagner man in the X division Battle Royal last Tuesday, and I have to say I ain’t no impressed by ‘im. So’s tonight, I’m gonna whip him up like a big ol’ pot of crawdad gumbo! Hoooooweee!

OR: 79

(Lash LeRoux gained in over from 55 to 57.)

As LeRoux is walking to the ring, the video screen flickers and a message is shown, telling us that the following message is brought to us by Vince Russo and SEX. Some familiar music plays, as Scott Hall appears on the screen with Vince Russo standing in the background. Hey, yo! Does Sting remember Scott Hall? Last week, Sting laid out Hall’s good buddy Konnan. Hall wants to get a piece of Sting tonight. Clips of Hall beating various current and former TNA wrestlers are shown. Despite the weird special effects and fairly poor production values, the crowd really boos this video.

OR: 100

(Scott Hall gained in over from 85 to 89.)

Lash LeRoux vs. Dr. Wagner Jr.: An average match by X-division standards, but still that’s nothing to shake a stick at. Unfortunately, the crowd hasn’t been trained to care about either wrestler at this point, and the lack of fan interest is really noticeable. However, there is a minor pop when LeRoux hits the Whiplash for the pinfall. I don’t know if it was for LeRoux or for the match being over.

Winner: Lash LeRoux

OR: 65

CR: 52

MQ: 79

Backstage, Michael Modest talks trash about Ebessan. I don’t know if that’s really fair because Ebessan can’t talk back – well, not in English, at least.

OR: 73

Brian Lawler vs. Steve Bradley: Lawler draws a surprisingly decent pop. Bradley draws silence. This X-division match is a little better than the first, but Lawler actually gets the fans involved some, so it’s a lot better match in total. Lots of high-flying moves, but the last one is a Hip Hop Drop from Lawler for the three count.

Winner: Brian Lawler

OR: 72

CR: 63

MQ: 81

Backstage, Percy Pringle stands with Malice and Bill Goldberg to talk about their Tag Team title match later tonight. Just like Kavovit and Snake said earlier, he’s so confident they’ll win that he’s even risking their existence as a tag team on it. Nothing groundbreaking, but the announcers had already given away the main points.

OR: 77

(Malice gained in over from 63 to 64.)

Ebessan vs. Michael Modest: This one is not a X division match – more like a barroom brawl. Who would have guessed? It’s still a pretty good match, and the fans boo Modest pretty much throughout the match. I guess they remember him hitting on Alicia a couple of weeks ago. Modest actually controls for most of the match, and in the end he hits the Reality Check for the pin.

Winner: Michael Modest

OR: 72

CR: 64

MQ: 81

The camera crew finally catches up to Sting in the locker room. Of course he will accept Scott Hall’s challenge, even if he wasn’t man enough to make it in person. Sting then goes on some rant about religion, which kind of lost some of the crowd.

OR: 92

NWA Tag Team Title match: Road Warriors © vs. Malice and Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): The Road Warriors start the match much like it was 1986 – they charge right into the ring and start kicking ass. Goldberg holds his own with Hawk, but Animal pretty much dominates Malice. Goldberg bails to catch his breath, allowing the Road Warriors to double-team Malice. Bad move on his part. While Pringle tries to get Goldberg back into the ring, Malice is being set up for the Doomsday Device. Hawk connects with it, which is very impressive given Malice’s size. Goldberg is back in, but he can’t break up the pin in time. Suddenly, Kronik rushes the ring, making in four-on-two. Well, six if you count Pringle, but he wisely doesn’t get in the ring. After about three solid minutes of destruction, the Road Warriors are left lying.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 81

CR: 80

MQ: 82

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 70 to 72.)

Backstage, the camera is focused on the door to the women’s locker room. I guess since Alicia Shamrock is the only woman in TNA, that must be hers. Disco Inferno walks up and knocks on the door.

Disco: Alicia, are you in there? It’s me, Disco Inferno. Listen, I saw the clips from your wedding reception yesterday, and I have to tell you something: girl, you can’t dance! So, if you’d like, I can teach you some new dance steps, and maybe even teach you the fine art of horizontal dancing, if you catch my drift!

Suddenly, the door opens, and there stands Ken Shamrock! Disco mumbles something (I think it was some kind of apology) and he turns and runs off, with Ken Shamrock staring after him.

OR: 74

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 60 to 62.)

Sting vs. Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): This crowd is hot! The floor of the TNA Asylum is shaking because of all the noise the fans make for this match. Sting dominates quickly, and Hall gets little offense for the first few minutes. Sting whips Hall to the corner and goes for the Stinger Splash, but Hall pulls the referee in the way. Sting continues the assault, even though the referee is down. Sting goes for another Stinger Splash, but as he’s charging Russo passes a chair to Hall. Hall whacks Sting, which knocks him out cold. Russo revives the referee as Hall goes for the Outsider’s Edge. Sting is in no position to fight back. The ref slowly counts to three, and suddenly Rick Steiner is out and joins Hall in beating down Sting. Russo even gets in a few cheap shots, before all three begin celebrating over Sting, which draws insane heat from the audience. The fans begin throwing their empty soda cups and popcorn boxes into the ring.

Winner: Scott Hall

OR: 87

CR: 91

MQ: 78

OR: 79

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 5028

Best segment: Scott Hall challenges Sting via music video (100)

Worst segment: Lash LeRoux over Dr. Wagner Jr. (65)

Best match: Scott Hall over Sting (87)

Tuesday, April 8, 2003

The SEX army gets stronger with the additions of Rick Steiner, Marcus Bagwell, Konnan, and Disco Inferno, even if Konnan did lose his debut match to Sting. Meanwhile, Percy Pringle now has two more big men in his stable, making his foursome one of the biggest, baddest bunches to ever appear in a wrestling ring together.

There’s really not that much to report outside the ring. None of the other wrestling promotions have made any major moves. I think the industry is still stunned that I was able to buy out not one, but two companies, including one like World Wrestling All-Stars. Meanwhile, it’s been surprisingly quiet backstage. The existing TNA talent has really welcomed the newcomers, and the new guys are trying their best to make a good impression. Of course, most of them are under verbal contracts, and I guess after my “housecleaning” in February nobody wants to piss off the boss. I’d say that’s a good policy.

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: ??????

The show opens once again with Mick Foley standing at the announcers’ desk. He recaps the events of last Wednesday afternoon, which led to the resignation of former XPlosion announcers Dino Dahl and Guido Lee. He then introduces us to the new announcers, Dick Williams and Ahmed Vaughn. They come out from backstage to a mostly indifferent crowd, although there is a smattering of polite applause. Once seated, Foley tells them to have a nice day, and then returns to his office.

OR: 84

Williams: Hello everyone, and welcome to the new XPlosion! I’m Dick Williams, and joining me is Ahmed Vaughn.

Vaughn: It’s good to be here, Dick, and I’d like to express best wishes to Dino and Guido, and a speedy get-well to Joey Styles and Barney Sommers.

Williams: That goes for me as well. But now for tonight. As you can see already in the ring, tonight’s opening match will be a Hardcore Battle Royal.

Vaughn: Commissioner Foley was thrilled with last week’s X division Battle Royal, so tonight he’s gone back to his roots and came up with this match.

Williams: Also we have a special challenge six-man match tonight, with America’s Most Wanted and their mentor, New Jack, teaming up to take on Percy Pringle’s group consisting of Bill Goldberg and Kronik.

Vaughn: Last Wednesday, Kronik assaulted New Jack after Goldberg and Malice defeated America’s Most Wanted, and New Jack requested this match for tonight to get some revenge.

Williams: Also tonight, Curt Hennig will be in action, and also we have obtained some special footage from the Shamrock’s wedding last month, which we will be showing you tonight.

Vaughn: Wait a minute, here comes Sonny Siaki! Sonny, what are you doing out here?

Siaki: I came out here to point out that I’ve been ripped off! Last month at Spring Slam, Jody Fleisch stole my X title. Then last week, commissioner Foley schedules a battle royal to determine who gets a shot at the X title at April Action and didn’t include me! You know, this is all a conspiracy against myself, Vince Russo, and all the members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme. Well, I’ve got news for you, Foley – we’re not going anywhere! So tonight, I’m challenging Ron Killings to put his title shot on the line against me. If he really thinks he deserves a shot at the title, perhaps first he should prove that he can beat someone who’s actually held the title.

Williams: Well, Sonny, I don’t know. I mean, first of all, I think this is something that you should take up with commissioner Foley. And second, I’m not even sure that Ron Killings is here tonight.

Siaki: Oh, he’s here all right. I saw him backstage earlier, bragging about winning that battle royal last week, when everyone knows he don’t deserve no title shot! I’ll take my case all the way to Foley if I have to, and if he says no, I’ll just have to beat his ass.

With that, Siaki turns and walks away.

OR: 84

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 71 to 74.)

Hardcore Battle Royal: As seen earlier, all sorts of weapons are already in the ring. A table, some chairs, trashcans, trashcan lids, some road signs, a crutch – wait a minute, New Jack isn’t in this match! The match begins, but only nine men are in the ring. Finally, Malice’s music hits, and Percy Pringle leads him to ringside. Well, at least one established wrestler is in this match, the other nine are all new acquisitions. Malice gets in the ring, and the first one to take a shot at him is The Damaja. Damaja hits him with a stop sign, but Malice no-sells. He grabs Damaja by the throat and Choke Slams him over the top rope to the floor (elimination #1)! Meanwhile, a chair shot from Richard Slinger sends Invader #1 over the top rope (elimination #2). Anthony Durante has experience in hardcore matches, and he expertly hits Scott Vick with a trashcan, sending him to the floor (elimination #3). Nathan Jones and Akira Taue team up to eliminate Bison Smith (elimination #4), but Malice grabs Taue and Choke Slams him through the table. As Jones and Malice battle, Slinger casually picks up Taue and pitches him over the top rope (elimination #5). Perry Saturn, the only man in this match who competed in last week’s X division battle royal, tries to catch Slinger by surprise, but he just drops down while holding the bottom rope, and Saturn goes flying out, unable to stop himself (elimination #6).

Final Four: Anthony Durante, Malice, Nathan Jones, and Richard Slinger. Slinger may have avoided Saturn, but while he taunts Saturn, Durante sneaks up behind him with a chair. He hits him on the back, sending him over the top rope to the floor (elimination #7). Meanwhile, Malice finally gets the taller man over the top rope, and Nathan Jones is out (elimination #8). Durante, still holding the chair, waits until Malice turns around. He hits him right on top of his head, which only serves to make him angry and Pringle to laugh. Choke Slam on a trashcan! Malice tosses him to end the match.

Winner: Malice

OR: 59

CR: 52

MQ: 66

Backstage, Curt Hennig talks about his match later tonight against Joe E. Legend. He proceeds to make fun if his name, saying that he’s nowhere near the legend Hennig is. Hennig proceeds to tell us the legend of Joe: he’s just some nobody that Hennig is going to beat.

OR: 80

The camera shows the referees and road agents cleaning up the ring, and the production staff mending a hole in the ring where it was punctured by a table leg. Meanwhile, Williams and Vaughn talk about the Shamrock’s wedding video. Finally, they show the video, which has some typical wedding music. Thankfully it’s not that crappy WWE wedding song. They kiss, cut the cake, dance, toss the flower bouquet – just your standard wedding reception stuff. Nothing groundbreaking, but the crowd eats it up.

OR: 98

(Ken Shamrock gained in over from 83 to 86. Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 57 to 60.)

Backstage, Percy Pringle stands with Kronik, talking about how they can’t wait to show these stupid rednecks who show up here every week what they can do. Suddenly, there’s a loud thud at the door behind them, and then suddenly Goldberg’s head pops through a hole in the door, which was caused when he gave it a headbutt.

OR: 68

Meanwhile, New Jack tells America’s Most Wanted that he’s only been beat up like he was last week on one other occasion, and in the end he shot those four guys. While he’s not as crazy as he used to be, he’s still going to teach Kronik that they messed with the wrong nigga.

OR: 78

Curt Hennig vs. Joe E. Legend: An interesting change of pace from earlier, as both men prefer a more technical match. However, Hennig’s victory was but a mere technicality, as he pins Legend with a Hennig Plex in a little less than five minutes.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 68

CR: 64

MQ: 72

Finally, the camera crews catch up with Ron Killings. He says that if Siaki thinks he can beat him, then he wants to prove Siaki wrong. He’s told us before, and now he’s once again going to tell us The Truth about Siaki: he can’t beat Killings fair and square.

OR: 85

New Jack & America’s Most Wanted vs. Bill Goldberg & Kronik (with Percy Pringle): Despite all the teaching by New Jack, Chris Harris and James Storm are not ready for this level of competition. In fact, the only time their team is actually in control is when New Jack is in the ring, and that’s a surprise since this isn’t a Hardcore match. However, all that changes when Goldberg is tagged in. New Jack punches, but Goldberg shows no effect. Apparently, Pringle teaches the fine art of no-selling. New Jack gets frustrated that everything he tries has no effect on Goldberg. Eventually, he looks under the ring and finds a crutch! Wow, that’s a shock. He breaks the crutch over Goldberg’s shoulder, officially making this a New Jack Match™. The referee starts to call for the bell, but then realizes that Goldberg is still standing – and yelling! He grabs New Jack and delivers a Jackhammer. Adams and Clark both knock AMW off the apron as Goldberg pins New Jack.

Winner: Goldberg & Kronik

OR: 68

CR: 62

MQ: 75

X division No. 1 Contender’s match: Ron Killings vs. Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): How about that, Russo’s actually been here for the whole show, and now he finally puts in an appearance. It’s a pretty good match, with Russo getting in some shots behind the referee’s back to help Siaki stay in control. It’s not enough, however, as television time is about to run out, Killings takes advantage. He signals for this finish, and of course Vince Russo hops up on the apron to distract him. Siaki charges, but Killings steps out of the way and Siaki collides with Russo. Killings then nails Siaki with the Truth Or Consequences for the pin. However, Russo actually gets in the ring and begins kicking Killings. Siaki is able to help with the beatdown, until Jody Fleisch comes from backstage. Russo sees him and grabs Siaki, and they get out of the ring before Fleisch can even get in a shot. Lots of finger pointing, as the referee checks on Killings.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 81

CR: 78

MQ: 84

OR: 77

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 4010

Best segment: Ken & Alicia Shamrock’s wedding video (98)

Worst segment: Hardcore Battle Royal (59)

Best match: Ron Killings over Sonny Siaki (81)

Wednesday, April 2, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: ??????

The show opens with a video clip, obviously shot by a camcorder. In the bottom corner of the screen, the date and time indicates that this was shot last night after XPlosion went off the air. In the foreground is the parking lot at the TNA Asylum. Announcers Dino Dahl and Guido Lee exit the building and walk towards their cars, as the person holding the camcorder ducks out of sight. A voice says “go,” and suddenly all four members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme are seen racing towards Dahl and Lee. They start beating the crap out of them! The cameraman (obviously it’s Vince Russo’s voice) keeps giving directions to SEX, and after a brief beatdown tells them they’re not welcome around here any more.

The camera fades out, and then back in, as the time/date stamp in the corner indicates this was from earlier this afternoon. A car pulls up, and Barney Sommers gets out. Once again, Scott Hall, B.G. James, Sonny Siaki, and TAKA Michinoku suddenly appear and start assaulting Sommers. Joey Styles appears, and he gets the same treatment. A siren sounds in the distance, and Russo’s voice (still working the camera, apparently) tells SEX that’s enough, and they all take off.

OR: 100

(Vince Russo gained in over from 83 to 85.)

We return live to the TNA Asylum where commissioner Mick Foley stands at the announcers’ desk, where two unfamiliar men are seated. Foley tells us that Styles and Sommers are currently in the hospital, and Dahl and Lee have submitted their resignations. He’s fortunate that the best announce team in the world was available on such short notice, and he introduces us to the men behind the desk, Steven Kavovit and Bart Snake. He decrees that if anyone touches another announcer, let alone physically assaulting them in the manner SEX did to Dahl, Lee, Styles, and Sommers, they will be fired! Also, he makes a match for later today: SEX against all the champions, Jeff Jarrett, Jody Fleisch, and the Road Warriors.

OR: 80

Kavovit: Hello, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of Total Nonstop Action! I’m Steven Kavovit, and my co-host is Bart Snake. Bart, it’s good to be here tonight.

Snake: Good to see you again, Steven. First of all, let me say that it’s good to be here in TNA, the hottest wrestling company in the industry today! But what about that match that commissioner Foley mad for later tonight?

Kavovit: All the champions of TNA on one side of the ring taking on SEX, it ought to be something. Also tonight, we have the latest chapter in the ongoing struggle between America’s Most Wanted and Percy Pringle’s duo of Malice and Bill Goldberg. We have some comments from both teams, recorded earlier tonight. Take a look.

Percy Pringle is standing by in his locker room. Malice is standing right behind him, and in the background Bill Goldberg paces back and forth. Tonight’s match won’t be a hardcore match, which is good news for America’s Most Wanted. If it had been, Malice and Goldberg would have made sure it turned into a death match. As it is, they’ve got a big surprise for AMW, and New Jack too, if he sticks his nose in their business.

OR: 74

(Bill Goldberg dropped in over from 92 to 90.)

The next video begins with James Storm and Chris Harris sitting in their locker room. New Jack comes in, pulls the cowboy hat off Storm’s head, and whips them both with it, before throwing the hat down and stomping on it. Needless to say, this gets Storm upset. New Jack tells them to keep that anger bottled up until their match later tonight, and then let it loose on Malice and Goldberg.

OR: 84

(Chris Harris gained in over from 44 to 45. James Storm gained in over from 43 to 44.)

Akira Taue & Ebessan vs. Anthony Durante & Invader #1: Finally, a match! Unfortunately, all four are new to TNA fans, so they have only minimal reaction to the four participants. Handshakes all around to start, and a decent match follows. After seven minutes of back-and-forth action, the team of Ebessan & Taue finally gets the advantage, and Ebessan scores the pin on Invader #1 after a Senton Bomb. Afterwards, they all shake hands again.

Winner: Akira Taue & Ebessan

OR: 68

CR: 54

MQ: 82

America’s Most Wanted (with New Jack) vs. Malice and Bill Goldberg (with Percy Pringle): Squash match, no surprise there. Goldberg finishes it with a Jackhammer on Chris Harris. After the pin, Malice and Goldberg continue the assault, and New Jack gets in the ring. He actually gets Malice and Goldberg off their feet, but it’s short-lived as Kronik comes out of the locker room to attack New Jack! Brian Adams and Bryan Clark appear to be taking direction from Percy Pringle. High Times on New Jack! Finally, Pringle waves Malice, Goldberg, and Kronik back to the locker room, as Pringle is all smiles.

Winner: Malice and Bill Goldberg

OR: 74

CR: 62

MQ: 87

Before their match, SEX hits the ring, and of course Vince Russo gets a microphone. He says that he doesn’t give a damn what Foley says, and those announcers got what was coming to them. He reminds us that he hired all four of them, and they turned their backs on him. They completely disrespected him, so they got punked out. So if Foley wants to see SEX take on Jarrett, Fleisch, and the Road Warriors, that’s fine with him.

OR: 76

Team TNA vs. Sports Entertainment Xtreme (with Vince Russo): There’s action all over the ring, as the referee can’t keep three men from each team to remain on the apron. Russo is orchestrating the run-ins for his team like an expert conductor. However, each man on the other team proves why he is currently wearing the gold. Jody Fleisch hits a Shining Wizard on B.G. James and follows it up with a Phoenix 720 DDT. Jarrett, Hawk, and Animal keep Hall, Siaki, and TAKA from breaking up the pinfall.

Winner: Team TNA

OR: 81

CR: 79

MQ: 83

The camera spots Russo waving at the locker room, and suddenly out come Rick Steiner, Marcus Bagwell, Konnan, and Disco Inferno! They jump Fleisch, Jarrett, and the Road Warriors, making it 8-on-4. Well, nine if you count Russo, who also gets in the ring and delivers some choice shots. Finally, all the referees and road agents get most of SEX out of the ring, while the paramedics pull Jarrett, Fleisch, and the Road Warriors out of the ring, leaving Russo and Konnan in the ring.

OR: 78

Russo gets the microphone, but before he can say anything, Konnan signals that he wants it, so Russo hands it to him. He wants to speak on this – arriba la raza! K-Dogg knows that there’s still plenty of time left on the show, so he calls out anyone in the back. Some new music plays, and out walks Sting! He howls and slaps hands on his way to the ring. Konnan looks stunned, and Russo gets out of the ring as Sting gets in.

OR: 90

(Konnan gained in over from 71 to 74.)

Sting vs. Konnan (with Vince Russo): Sting has been in the business long enough to know all of Russo’s tricks, always avoiding whatever side of the ring Russo is at. Sting runs through his offense, finally locking in the Scorpion Deathlock. Russo jumps up on the apron, but Sting spots him and simply waves a finger at him. Frustrated, Russo drops back to the floor and slaps the apron as Konnan taps out. Russo waves to the back again, and the other seven members of SEX hit the ring, but Sting escapes through the crowd.

Winner: Sting

OR: 80

CR: 84

MQ: 74

OR: 80

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 4018

Best segment: Video of SEX assaulting the announcers (100)

Worst segment: Akira Taue & Ebessan over Anthony Durante & Invader #1 (68)

Best match: Team TNA over SEX (81)

Tuesday, April 1, 2003

The fall-out from Sunday’s big day of matches by all wrestling companies showed that some promotions are still having trouble. For the second month in a row, Phoenix Championship Wrestling, IPW Hardcore, Extreme Canadian Championship Wrestling, and All Pro Wrestling were forced to cancel their show. As a result, PCW, IPW, and ECCW have fallen to Small level.

On the other hand, we have reached a milestone, having risen to Global level. Also, Vince McMahon and Ric Flair have retired from World Wrestling Entertainment, as I mentioned last month. We’ll see how that company will fare without its founder and guiding light.

As part of my goal to help improve morale, I’m working on getting all my stars to midcard status. Sure, those in the upper midcard and main event won’t be happy at first, but in the long run this will help because as midcarders they don’t drop in morale if they don’t wrestle on a show. To that end, Jeff Jarrett has been demoted to the upper midcard, and Ken Shamrock and Bill Goldberg have been demoted to the midcard.

For the second month in a row, there is no one in development that is ready to be promoted. Because of this, as well as the better talent available to us as a Global promotion, we’ve decided to turn over some of the staff members as well. Vince Russo is doing such a good job with his on-screen character, we have removed him from the writing staff so he can concentrate on developing that character. The new head writer is Charlotte Randall, the new head medic is Silent Lonestar, the head trainer is Dory Funk, and the new booker of NWA Japan is announcer Steven Kavovit.

One of the big problems with becoming a Global wrestling promotion is that we have a relatively small active roster. We have some talented performers in development and some youngsters in training camp who will become stars one day, but for now we need some more bodies. We got a strong influx of talented workers when we blew all the money we had by buying out Pro Wrestling Iron and World Wrestling All-Stars. Some of the new wrestlers that have a lot of potential have been sent to development for further improvement, and the less-talented ones have been released.

With all the new additions, here’s what our active roster looks like today (faces in blue, heels in red, tweeners in black, all followed by their current over):

MAIN EVENT

Sting (94)

UPPER MIDCARD

Jeff Jarrett (86)

Curt Hennig (84)

Road Warrior Hawk (82)

Ron Killings (81)

Road Warrior Animal (78)

MIDCARDERS

Ken Shamrock (83)

Jody Fleisch (81)

Masato Tanaka (80)

Ebessan (70)

Norman Smiley (70)

Anthony Durante (65)

Brian Lawler (71)

Bill Goldberg (92)

Scott Hall (85)

TAKA Michinoku (85)

B.G. James (78)

Marcus Bagwell (75)

Disco Inferno (74)

Konnan (71)

Sonny Siaki (71)

Michael Modest (65)

Bryan Clark (64)

Malice (63)

Rick Steiner (63)

Brian Adams (62)

LOWER MIDCARDERS

Akira Taue (60)

Perry Saturn (60)

Lash LeRoux (55)

Nathan Jones (55)

Shark Boy (50)

Invader #1 (45)

Chris Harris (44)

The Damaja (44)

James Storm (43)

Bison Smith (59)

Richard Slinger (60)

Steve Bradley (57)

Dr. Wagner Jr. (50)

Johnny Swinger (48)

Scott Vick (46)

Joe E. Legend (45)

OPENERS

none

JOBBERS

none

MANAGERS

New Jack (84)

Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock (55)

Vince Russo (83)

Percy Pringle (71)

Cyrus The Virus (65)

NON-WRESTLERS

Mick Foley (87)

Mike Sanders (67)

TAG TEAMS {members} (experience)

Road Warriors {Road Warrior Hawk & Road Warrior Animal} (100)

Kronik {Brian Adams & Bryan Clark} (80)

America’s Most Wanted {James Storm & Chris Harris} (46)

TITLES (image) {current holder}

NWA World (81) {Jeff Jarrett}

NWA X (71) {Jody Fleisch}

NWA Tag Team (70) {Road Warriors}

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dino Dahl and Guido Lee

Dahl: Greetings, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of XPlosion! I’m your host, Dino Dahl, and joining me is Guido Lee.

Lee: Thanks, Dino. Tell me, have you seen the format for the show tonight?

Dahl: No, why? What has Foley done?

Lee: I don’t know, I haven’t seen a format either.

Dahl: Oh, here comes commissioner Foley right now. Good evening, commissioner. What’s on your mind?

Foley: First of all, I want to congratulate Jody Fleisch on winning the NWA X title last Sunday at Spring Slam! Also, kudos to Jeff Jarrett on retaining the NWA World title and the Road Warriors on keeping the NWA Tag Titles. Now, on to tonight’s business. I have a major announcement to make, one that will shake TNA to its very foundation!

Dahl: Wow! You haven’t even been on the job a week, and already you’re making big statements like that.

Foley: Hey, Dino, I’m just trying to do everything I can to put on the best matches for the best wrestling fans in the world, right here in Nashville, Tennessee!

Lee: So what’s this big announcement?

Foley: Since last Sunday, I’ve scrounged under every seat cushion, raided every phone booth, and shook every vending machine I could find, looking for all the loose change I could get. You see, there were a couple of major acquisitions that were available, but they weren’t going to come cheap.

Dahl: Whoa, hold on, Mick. Last month we saw the TNA debut of Bill Goldberg, one of the biggest stars in the business today, and you’re going to bring in another superstar?

Foley: Hear me out, Dino. I didn’t just buy one or two superstars, I bought the whole damn promotion! Tell me, Guido, have you ever heard of Pro Wrestling Iron?

Lee: Well, yes, but they don’t have any superstar that would be a serious title contender here in TNA. I mean, they don’t have anyone that can step in the ring with Goldberg, Jeff Jarrett, the Road Warriors …

Foley: You may be right, but they have some very good wrestlers, some of which we will see tonight … in that very ring, here in the TNA Asylum!

Dahl: Mick, I’m sure they’re fine wrestlers, but what Guido was trying to say is …

Foley: Wait, I’m not finished yet. Not only did I buy Pro Wrestling Iron, I also bought out World Wrestling All-Stars!

Lee: Now that is a story!

Dahl: You’re telling me that you have acquired the services of Sting?

Foley: Sting, as well as Norman Smiley, Masato Tanaka, Perry Saturn, Nathan Jones, Lash LeRoux, the list just goes on and on!

Lee: Wow!

Dahl: So, commissioner, with all this new talent, what are we going to see tonight?

Foley: I know Jody Fleisch is looking forward to some competition for his X title, so tonight we’re going to have a ten-man X division battle royal to determine who will get a shot at the X title at April Action!

Suddenly, some new music hits, and out walks Mike Sanders!

Sanders: Now hold on, Foley. I can’t speak for the PWI guys, but I do speak for the WWA guys when I say that we’re not here to be whipping boys for your homegrown talent. We’re not going to be happy to jerk the curtain every night, getting paid next to nothing to be in opening matches and jobbing to people these so-called fans are used to seeing. I just came from your office, and look what I found lying on your desk. This is the format for tonight’s show? You somehow acquired the best group of talent outside the WWE itself, and this is the best you can do? Opening match: The Damaja vs. Richard Slinger. Who in the hell are those two?

Foley: Damaja and Slinger are two of the young stars from PWI. They …

Sanders: Then you’ve got Nathan Jones vs. Bison Smith and Masato Tanaka vs. Scott Vick. You had your pick of all the WWA stars and these are the four you picked to feature tonight?

Foley: Don’t forget about the X division battle royal. You know seven of the participants are from World Wrestling All-Stars.

Sanders: But what about …

Foley: Look, that’s enough out of you! Now I suggest you get back to your locker room if you plan on being able to eat solid foods for the next week!

With that threat, Sanders backs away and returns to the locker room.

Foley: Well, I guess now you know the rest of the card tonight, so sit back and enjoy the ride!

OR: 77

(Mike Sanders gained in over from 67 to 69.)

The Damaja vs. Richard Slinger: The fans don’t know either wrestler very well, so they don’t respond to this match as well as I hoped. Really, it’s not as good of a match as they’re used to seeing, either. After seven minutes of silence, Slinger finally scores the pin after a Flying Press.

Winner: Richard Slinger

OR: 61

CR: 50

MQ: 72

Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock is standing in front of a vending machine, buying a diet soda. One of the new wrestlers approaches and grabs her by the arm.

Modest: Hey, babe!

Alicia: Let me go!

Modest: I just had to tell you that you’re the finest piece of ass I’ve seen around this dump all day.

Alicia: And who are you supposed to be?

Modest: My name is Michael Modest, but as all the women know, when we’re alone I’m not modest at all. Why don’t you come back to my locker room where I can show you?

Alicia: Get away from me, creep!

Ken Shamrock walks around the corner, and Modest lets Alicia go before Ken saw anything.

Ken: Hey, there you are. Oh good, you got my soft drink. I was starting to get worried about you. Come on.

As the Shamrocks walk away, Alicia looks back at Modest, who winks at her.

OR: 78

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 55 to 56. Michael Modest gained in over from 65 to 66.)

Nathan Jones vs. Bison Smith: Jones’ entrance music sounds strangely reminiscent of Outback Jack’s theme song – that’s not a good thing. Fortunately, he finishes Smith quickly with a Choke Slam. Say, where’s Malice – that’s gimmick infringement!

Winner: Nathan Jones

OR: 66

CR: 60

MQ: 73

The camera cuts to the commissioner’s office, where he’s got what appears to be a couple of sock puppets on his desk. Suddenly, the door is thrown open by Ken Shamrock, who charges right up to Mick Foley, with Alicia in tow. Apparently, Alicia told him what Michael Modest tried to do to her at the soda machine, so he wants a piece of Modest tonight. Foley tries to calm him down, talking about all the fun times they had together as the Union. But Ken won’t be denied, so Foley gives him the match. He pulls a gavel out of one of the sock puppets and declares that his judgment is final.

OR: 86

(Michael Modest gained in over from 66 to 68.)

Masato Tanaka vs. Scott Vick: This match is a definite improvement over the earlier contests, but still the fans don’t care. I think they’d even settle for seeing SEX rather than this parade of new characters. This is your basic squash, as Tanaka finishes him in four minutes with the Roaring Elbow.

Winner: Masato Tanaka

OR: 70

CR: 57

MQ: 83

Backstage, Michael Modest says that he’s not afraid of Ken Shamrock, and he doesn’t know what Alicia sees in that loser. He tells us he’s much more of a man than Shamrock ever will be.

OR: 65

Meanwhile, in the Shamrocks’ dressing room, Alicia tells us that you don’t lay your hands on someone else’s wife. Ken says that’s especially true with the wife of the world’s most dangerous man!

OR: 86

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 56 to 57.)

X division No. 1 contender’s battle royal: An interesting concept from commissioner Foley – take a bunch of high-flying guys and put them in a match where the winner is the last one to go over the top rope. Not surprisingly, this does not match the standard of excellence by which most X division matches are judged. The first person to be eliminated is Johnny Swinger (elimination #1), who is tossed out by Brian Lawler. Next is Steve Bradley (elimination #2), who is sent over the top rope by a dropkick from Shark Boy. A couple of minutes later they are joined by Lash LeRoux (elimination #3), who is tossed by the unlikely combination of Brian Lawler and TAKA Michinoku. Well, forget that – TAKA just tossed Brian Lawler (elimination #4). Ebessan scores his first elimination after a spin kick sends Perry Saturn to the floor (elimination #5). Shark Boy scores another elimination, this time by tossing Dr. Wagner Jr. (elimination #6).

Final Four: Ebessan, Ron Killings, Shark Boy, TAKA Michinoku. Of these, Shark Boy is the first to go (elimination #7), courtesy of Ebessan. Meanwhile, TAKA and Killings are going at it, much like they have for the past several minutes. Ebessan tries to butt in, but they both grab him and send him flying (elimination #8). TAKA is the quickest to take advantage of the distraction, and eventually gains control. He climbs to the top rope, but Killings lunges for the rope, which shakes enough to cause TAKA to lose his balance. TAKA gets crotched! I hope he didn’t have any plans for SEX tonight. Killings simply pushes TAKA off the turnbuckle to the floor to earn the title shot.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 65

CR: 60

MQ: 71

Hey, the sharp-minded camera crew finally spots Chris Rock sitting in the front row! Hey, at least they spotted him before the main event. However, it isn’t very long after Dino and Guido recognize him that out from the back comes Cyrus The Virus, who starts berating Chris Rock until the usual gang of referees and road agents drag him to the back.

OR: 85

(Cyrus The Virus gained in over from 65 to 68.)

Ken Shamrock (with Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock) vs. Michael Modest: Shamrock is obviously upset about what Modest did to his wife, and he lets his emotions run wild. This allows Modest to control for most of the match. On several occasions he blows kisses to Alicia. Unfortunately for him, the last time he does that Ken Shamrock grabs is ankle and slaps on the Ankle Lock! Modest Screams in agony as he taps out. Finally, Alicia gets him to release the hold. Good match.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 78

CR: 73

MQ: 83

OR: 74

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 4047

Best segment: (tie) Mick Foley makes the match between Ken Shamrock and Michael Modest; Interview with Ken Shamrock and Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock (86)

Worst segment: Richard Slinger over The Damaja (61)

Best match: Ken Shamrock over Michael Modest (78)

Sunday, March 30, 2003

After the show on Wednesday, Brian Lawler told me that he thought Road Warrior Hawk was working too stiff. I told him I’d take care of it, just to get him to leave me alone.

I think Spring Slam culminates the best month of writing I’ve done. OK, it’s only my second month in the company, but I think the story lines are fairly interesting for each match. All the active wrestlers will be competing tonight, except for Curt Hennig and Ron Killings, who are out selling their injuries after their match with Malice and Super Destroyer on Wednesday.

Last night was a long night for the production crew, getting everything set up for today. We opened the TNA Asylum early this morning for our first-ever Fan Festival. A couple of thousand people showed up to get autographs and shake hands with all their favorite TNA superstars. The fans really enjoyed it, and I think most of the wrestlers had a good time, too.

Before the show begins, America’s Most Wanted and New Jack begin preparing the ring with all the typical weapons for tonight’s Hardcore match. New Jack gets the microphone and tells the audience that they’ve already seen what AMW has done to Malice, and they’re not scared of the Super Destroyer. Tonight they’re going to bust him up too.

OR: 85

TNA Spring Slam

Hosts: Joey Styles and Dino Dahl

Styles: Hello, everyone, and welcome to Spring Slam! I’m Joey Styles, and joining me tonight is the host of TNA XPlosion, Dino Dahl. Welcome to pay-per-view, Dino.

Dahl: Thanks Joey, it’s great to be here tonight. We’ve got a full slate of six matches, including three title matches, and already America’s Most Wanted is in the ring, ready for their Hardcore match.

Styles: Malice and Super Destroyer are now on their way to the ring, so let’s head there now for our opening match!

Hardcore match: America’s Most Wanted (with New Jack) vs. Malice and Super Destroyer (with Percy Pringle): Despite the Hardcore rules, this one isn’t much of a contest. The mini-push of AMW comes to a screeching halt after Super Destroyer hits Chris Harris with a Spear. By the time the referee has counted to three, New Jack is in the ring with a crutch. He breaks it over Super Destroyer’s back, officially making this a New Jack Match™. However, Super Destroyer stands up and stares at him. I think New Jack is stunned! Super Destroyer grabs him … Jackhammer! Super Destroyer pops up and rips his mask off. It’s Bill Goldberg!

Styles: Oh my God!

Winner: Malice and Goldberg

OR: 70

CR: 56

MQ: 85

While the referees and road agents get the ring cleaned up and all the plunder taken away, Ken Shamrock and Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock stop by the announcers’ desk. Alicia reminds us that a few years ago, when she was first starting in the wrestling business, she was supposed to be Ken’s sister. Because of that, they had to travel together and spend quite a lot of time together, so they got to know each other pretty well, and their relationship just grew from there. The reason Ken was losing those matches was because he was thinking more about the wedding than silly, inconsequential wrestling matches. But the wedding’s over now, and it’s time to get back to business. Ken takes the microphone and tells Brian Lawler that he shouldn’t have put his hands on his wife, and now he’s going to pay.

OR: 76

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 53 to 54.)

Ken Shamrock (with Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock) vs. Brian Lawler: Much like the first match, this one’s pretty much a glorified squash. On the few occasions that Lawler does get control, instead of following up with another move, he gestures towards Alicia and his crotch. Needless to say, this only makes Ken angrier. He slaps on the Ankle Lock, and Lawler taps out. However, Shamrock won’t release the hold! Just as it looks like the referee is about to reverse his decision, Alicia catches Ken’s eye and waves him off.

Winner: Ken Shamrock

OR: 76

CR: 70

MQ: 83

NWA X title match: Jody Fleisch vs. Sonny Siaki © (with Vince Russo): Now it’s time for the SEX portion of the pay-per-view. A great match, even for X division standards. Fleisch signals to the crowd, and Russo jumps up on the apron. However, this time Fleisch is ready. He shoves Siaki into Russo, knocking him to the floor. Phoenix 720 DDT! Russo can’t recover in time to save Siaki, and we have a new champion. The other members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme hit the ring, but Fleisch escapes through the crowd with the X title.

Winner: Jody Fleisch

OR: 81

CR: 73

MQ: 90

(The NWA X title has gained in image from 67 to 71.)

The ring crew assembles the cage for the tag match while the video screen shows highlights of matches from earlier tonight. When the cage is nearly finished, Mick Foley enters the ring.

Foley: Hello everyone, I hope you’re enjoying the show. First of all, congratulations to Jody Fleisch for becoming the new NWA X champion. However, we all saw what happened after the match, so I’ve made a decision regarding another one of tonight’s matches. Since we’ve already got this cage set up, I’ve decided that my match with Vince Russo will take place inside this cage to prevent the other members of Sports Entertainment Xtreme from interfering. I know that the only reason Russo ever got to be commissioner in the first place was because of interference, and I’m not going to let that happen again.

Russo comes out to the announcers’ desk and picks up a microphone.

Russo: You can’t do that, Mick! I’m not a wrestler!

Foley: I thought you were a former WCW champion?

Russo: Um, yeah, but …

Foley: And didn’t you win that title in a cage match?

Russo: Well, yeah, but …

Foley: Then get your ass in here!

OR: 86

Cage match, for the commissioner’s job: Mick Foley vs. Vince Russo: On several occasions, Russo tries to escape the cage, but each time Foley pulls him back in. Having Russo in the match really limits the quality, but he does keep it entertaining with his facial expressions and by screaming in pain. Double Arm DDT! Russo is out cold. Foley begins to climb the cage, but suddenly the ring is surrounded by the members of SEX. If Foley leaves the cage, SEX will be waiting to destroy him. Foley climbs back down into the ring, walking around while looking at the four men, who have taken up positions on each side of the ring. Then, from the back come Jody Fleisch, Jeff Jarrett, and the Road Warriors, and the fight is on! With Sports Entertainment Xtreme distracted, Foley exits out the door for the win. It’s five-on-four on the floor as the referee gets Russo out of the ring. Eventually, TAKA Michinoku, B.G. James, and the Road Warriors enter the cage.

Winner: Mick Foley

OR: 73

CR: 83

MQ: 52

NWA Tag Team title Cage match: Road Warriors © vs. B.G. James & TAKA Michinoku: The ref calls for the bell to start the match, as the road agents get Hall, Siaki, Jarrett, Fleisch, and Foley to take their brawling backstage. James & TAKA show much-improved teamwork than in their earlier matches, but it’s not enough. Still, James is as close to winning the titles as he’s ever been. This time it’s not his partner that gets pinned, it’s James himself that does after a Powerslam from Animal.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 80

CR: 76

MQ: 84

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 68 to 70.)

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Scott Hall: Styles and Dahl remind us that anyone who interferes in this match will be suspended without pay for six months. Hall must be serious about winning the title, because he appears to be sober tonight. But if he wins, I’m sure he’ll have one heck or a victory celebration! But alas, it was not meant to be. Without Russo or anyone else from SEX, Jarrett has Hall one-on-one, and Jarrett’s the better wrestler. He finishes hall with the Stroke.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 80

CR: 81

MQ: 79

(The NWA World title has gained in image from 79 to 81.)

OR: 80

Buy rate: 0.77

Attendance: 9040

Best segment: Foley declares his match with Russo to be a Cage match (86)

Worst segment: Malice and Goldberg over America’s Most Wanted (70)

Best match: Jody Fleisch over Sonny Siaki (81)

Wednesday, March 26, 2003

After losing her match yesterday, April was released from her contract. With the company on the brink of going Global, she just doesn’t fit in with our future plans.

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Joey Styles and Barney Sommers

The show opens with clips from last week’s show, where Sports Entertainment Xtreme was re-formed when Scott Hall joined in the beat-down of the Road Warriors. Also shown is Hall’s interview, informing us of the World title match between him and Jeff Jarrett at Spring Slam.

OR: 100

(Vince Russo gained in over from 77 to 80.)

Styles starts to introduce the show, but Vince Russo is already on his way to the announcers’ desk, where he grabs a microphone.

Russo: Do you know how quiet it was in my office today, Joey? I didn’t have April nagging me for a shot at the Miss TNA title. God, I can’t stand her. I don’t know how Brian Lawler can stand to be around her. All she ever does is nag.

Styles: Vince, do you have something to tell us about tonight’s show?

Russo: First of all, that’s Commissioner Russo to you. Second, I have an announcement to make regarding the X title match this Sunday. I’ve talked to TAKA Michinoku, and he’s agreed to forfeit the match to Sonny Siaki, since he doesn’t want to fight a fellow SEX partner.

Sommers: SEX partner?

Suddenly, some unfamiliar music sounds, and through the curtains steps Mick Foley! He plays to the crowd before going to the announcers’ desk.

Styles: Mick Foley, what are you doing here on Total Nonstop Action?

Russo: It doesn’t matter why he’s here. This is my show, so get the hell out!

Foley: I’ve got something I need to show you, Vince.

With that, Foley sticks his hand into his sweatpants.

Russo: Dammit, Mick, I don’t want to see that!

Foley: What? I’m telling you, Vince, you really need to see this. It’s white, about eleven inches long, and since it’s been in my pants all day it’s pretty wrinkled. Here, look.

Sommers: Ah!

Foley pulls a folded sheet of paper from his pants, to the relief of everyone.

Foley: This is a copy of the judge’s order you got a month ago to keep Bob Armstrong from having Loser Leaves Town matches. Remember that? Let me read you a part of it. As part of the terms, it says that “any commissioner who stipulates that someone must leave NWA: TNA as a result of losing a match shall be stripped of the commissionership.” Yesterday, Vince, you booked a match where if April lost she would have to leave NWA: TNA, remember? Well then, by the terms of this new judge’s order, you are hereby stripped of all commissionary powers and abilities!

Russo: No!

Foley: Furthermore, the court hereby appoints a new commissioner to NWA: TNA, Mick Foley!

Styles: Yes!

Russo: No!

Foley: Now, for Sunday’s matches. There’s nothing I can do about the match you signed for the World title. Jeff Jarrett will defend his title against Scott Hall. But I can add stipulations. If anyone, including you, interferes in that match, they will be suspended without pay for six months!

Russo: No! You can’t do that!

Foley: I just did! And I’ve reviewed the tapes from last night, and since TAKA Michinoku as forfeited his X title shot, I have named Jody Fleisch the No. 1 contender, and he will face Sonny Siaki for the X title! Vince, Vince, don’t cry for TAKA. Look, I know B.G. James wants to get his hands on the Road Warriors, and since the other members of SEX will be occupied by their own matches, I’m giving James and TAKA a Tag Team title match … inside a steel cage!

Russo: No! No!

Foley: But I’ll tell you what, Vince. I want to prove to you that I can be a fair commissioner. I’ll give you a shot to regain the commissionership this Sunday. All you have to do is beat … me!

Russo looks stunned. Tonight was supposed to be a SEX celebration, but it’s turned into his worst nightmare.

Styles: What’s it going to be, Vince?

Russo: OK, I’ll do it. You’ve taken everything I’ve worked so hard for, if I have to beat you to get it back I’ll do it.

Foley: All right then, I’ll see you Sunday! Oh, by the way – I thought James and TAKA might want to get some practice teaming together after what happened the last time they teamed up, so I signed them up for a match tonight – a Hardcore match against America’s Most Wanted.

Russo: No, God dammit!

OR: 87

(Vince Russo gained in over from 80 to 83.)

Hardcore match: America’s Most Wanted (with New Jack) vs. B.G. James & TAKA Michinoku (with Vince Russo): James and TAKA come to the ring, obviously as upset at the recent turn of events as their boss, but they forget to bring any weapons with them. However, when AMW comes out, they bring enough for both teams. Surprisingly enough, New Jack doesn’t get involved, and is content to yell directions and encouragement to his young team. I don’t know why, since it’s a Hardcore match, so there’s no countout and no disqualifications. This is proven when Russo slides into the ring, grabs a Singapore cane and nails Chris Harris in the back. James covers for the easy pin. At that point, New Jack comes into the ring, too, and Vince Russo runs to the back. New Jack grabs a crutch and breaks it over James’ back, officially making this a New Jack Match™. TAKA pulls James out before New Jack can inflict any more damage.

Winner: B.G. James & TAKA Michinoku

OR: 72

CR: 60

MQ: 85

Road Warrior Hawk vs. Brian Lawler: This is a short match – only because two minutes in, B.G. James and TAKA Michinoku come out and jump Hawk! Animal comes in shortly thereafter, but it’s still three-on-two. That is, until Ken Shamrock comes out and chases away Brian Lawler. With the odds evened, the Road Warriors quickly take control of James and TAKA, until they get out of the ring.

Winner: Hawk by disqualification

OR: 75

CR: 70

MQ: 80

Backstage, Percy Pringle stands with the Super Destroyer and a bandaged Malice. Apparently, Curt Hennig wants more of the Super Destroyer, and he’s chosen Ron Killings as his partner tonight. Unfortunately, that’s the last partner he’s ever going to have, because tonight the whole world is going to see why the masked man is known as the Super Destroyer.

OR: 66

In the SEX locker room, Sonny Siaki and Scott Hall discuss their matches at Spring Slam. They decide they can’t wait, so they challenge Jeff Jarrett and Jody Fleisch to a tag match later tonight.

OR: 75

Curt Hennig & Ron Killings vs. Malice and Super Destroyer (with Percy Pringle): Styles and Sommers remind us of last week’s match between Killings and Hennig, and the respect the two men have for each other as a result of that match. Much like last night, Super Destroyer dominates whenever he’s in the ring. However, Malice is obviously still feeling the effects of New Jack’s hardcore assault last week, so Killings and Hennig manage to get control whenever he’s in the ring. Unfortunately for them, it’s not that often. Super Destroyer lands a vicious Spear on Hennig, then tags Malice. Choke Slam! Killings tries to make the save, but Destroyer anticipates that, and delivers a Spear to him as well! After Malice pins Hennig, they proceed to destroy both Killings and Hennig, before Pringle eventually calls them off, telling them to save some for Sunday.

Winner: Malice and Super Destroyer

OR: 77

CR: 76

MQ: 78

The announcers throw it backstage to an interviewer they identify as Phil Misery. He’s standing by with Alicia Webb and Ken Shamrock.

Misery: Alicia, what can you tell us about your relationship with Shamrock?

Alicia: First, Phil, as you saw earlier tonight Kenny is really upset with Brian Lawler after the way he treated me yesterday, and he wants to challenge him to a match at Spring Slam.

Misery: That’s fine, but what about …

Suddenly, Mick Foley walks into the camera shot.

Foley: Ken, you want a match with Brian Lawler? Fine, consider it done. Now, Alicia, since Vince Russo fired the only other female in the company yesterday, you have no challengers to the title of Miss TNA. So, as commissioner, I hereby retire the Miss TNA crown, declaring Alicia Webb to forever be known as Miss TNA.

Alicia: Thanks, commissioner Foley, but I have to tell you that you’re wrong about something.

Foley: What’s that?

Alicia. I’m married now. My name is Alicia Shamrock.

Misery: What?!?!

With that, the Shamrocks turn and walk away.

OR: 75

(Miss TNA Alicia Shamrock gained in over from 51 to 53.)

Jeff Jarrett & Jody Fleisch vs. Scott Hall & Sonny Siaki (with Vince Russo): The match is pretty rough, since neither team has tagged with each other before. But the skill of the wrestlers involved overcomes that initial awkwardness. Much like the other matches tonight involving SEX, Vince Russo just can’t stay out of it. He distracts Fleisch, setting him up for a Fallaway Slam from Scott Hall. Siaki keeps Jarrett away while the referee counts the pin.

Winner: Scott Hall & Sonny Siaki

OR: 80

CR: 77

MQ: 84

OR: 78

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 3501

Best segment: Video involving SEX (100)

Worst segment: Interview with Percy Pringle with Malice and Super Destroyer (66)

Best match: Scott Hall & Sonny Siaki over Jeff Jarrett & Jody Fleisch (80)

Tuesday, March 25, 2003

Wednesday was just another “one of those days.” Despite the low overall rating of the matches, Scott Hall’s turn and New Jack’s debut went about as well as could be expected. Hopefully that trend will continue tonight when Percy Pringle debuts his new find …

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dino Dahl and Guido Lee

Dahl: Greetings, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of XPlosion! I’m your host, Dino Dahl, and joining me is Guido Lee.

Lee: Thanks, Dino. Tonight we’ve got another outstanding card, highlighted by a Tag Team title match between the Road Warriors and the SEX team of B.G. James and Scott Hall.

Dahl: Last Wednesday on Total Nonstop Action, Vince Russo reformed Sports Entertainment Xtreme, and their newest member, Scott Hall, challenged Jeff Jarrett for the World title this Sunday at Spring Slam.

Lee: And tonight he, along with James, gets a shot at the Road Warriors’ NWA Tag Team titles. I think Vince Russo is behind this, don’t you?

Dahl: I’d imagine so. Also, we have a No. 1 contender’s match in the X division, with Jody Fleisch taking on TAKA Michinoku, and the winner will face Sonny Siaki this Sunday at Spring Slam.

Lee: Let’s see … Siaki, the NWA X champion, is a member of SEX. Michinoku is a member of SEX. Fleisch isn’t a member of SEX. I think Vince Russo is behind this, don’t you?

Dahl: What would happen if Siaki had to face Michinoku this Sunday?

Lee: Well, all I know is our opening match is also a title match, April versus Alicia Webb. Dino, what’s up with Alicia Webb and Ken Shamrock?

Dahl: It’s been nearly two weeks since we’ve seen either of them, but more importantly, commissioner Russo added some interesting stipulations to this match. Check out this footage from earlier tonight.

April is in Russo’s office, and Russo already looks upset.

Russo: You want another shot at the Miss TNA crown? You’ve been bugging me every night for a shot since you lost that crown at Total Elimination. Well, I’m tired of hearing about it. If you want another shot, it’s going to be under my terms. Are you prepared for that?

April nods her head, as Brian Lawler enters the office, looking concerned.

Russo: All right then, here’s the deal. Tonight will be your last shot. If you win, you’ll be Miss TNA. But if you lose, you’re outta here! You’re fired!

Lawler grabs April’s arm and starts pulling her out of Russo’s office.

Russo: Yeah, get on out of here! I’ve got a whole lot more important things to worry about than Miss TNA.

OR: 60

(April gained in over from 18 to 21. Vince Russo dropped in over from 79 to 77.)

We return from the commercial break to find Alicia Webb at the announcers’ desk. She’s sorry for the situation April finds herself in, but she doesn’t plan on losing the Miss TNA title to her. The announcers try to ask about Ken Shamrock, but she walks toward the ring without answering the question.

OR: 79

(Alicia Webb gained in over from 48 to 51.)

Miss TNA title match: Alicia Webb © vs. April (with Brian Lawler): Ugh. Terrible match. Fortunately, they keep it fairly short. The end comes when April tries an Irish Whip, but gets reversed by Alicia. Brian Lawler was waiting to trip Alicia, but doesn’t realize the move was reversed. With April down, Alicia quickly applies the Ankle Lock, and April taps out. Only then does Lawler realize what happened. He jumps in the ring and grabs Alicia by a handful of hair. Just when it looks like he’s going to punch her, Ken Shamrock comes from backstage and nails Lawler with a clothesline. He applies the Ankle Lock to Lawler! Finally, Alicia gets him to release the hold, and Shamrock escorts her to the back.

Winner: Alicia Webb

OR: 38

CR: 48

MQ: 17

(The Miss TNA title gained in image from 30 to 36.)

The camera cuts to another part of the arena, where Percy Pringle stands in front of a dressing room door with a smile on his face. He tells us that despite the improbability of it, he actually has found someone who is just as mean and tough as Malice. Suddenly, there’s a loud thump, and the dressing room door shakes violently. Then the door opens, and out steps a large man wearing a mask and a Georgia Bulldogs football jersey. Hey, they know how to draw heat – most of the people in attendance at the TNA Asylum are Tennessee Volunteer fans! Pringle challenges anyone to take on the Super Destroyer later tonight.

OR: 72

The camera cuts to Vince Russo sitting in his office, holding Sonny Siaki’s NWA X title. He tells TAKA Michinoku to take a look at it. TAKA gestures like he wants the title around his waist, but Russo says it’s more important that the title remains with Sports Entertainment Xtreme, so tonight it’s his job to make sure Jody Fleisch does not earn the title shot.

OR: 73

X title No. 1 contenders match: Jody Fleisch vs. TAKA Michinoku (with Vince Russo): This is perhaps the best match in the history of NWA: TNA. After more than 15 minutes of back-and-forth action, Fleisch lands the Phoenix 720 DDT on Michinoku, but predictably Russo hops up on the apron before Fleisch covers. Fleisch then foolishly chases Russo around the ring while TAKA recovers. Russo cuts through the ring with Fleisch hot on his tail, but he walks right into a dropkick. Michinoku Driver! That’s enough for the pin.

Winner: TAKA Michinoku

OR: 83

CR: 75

MQ: 92

TAKA and Vince return to the dressing room as Fleisch slowly gets to his feet. Suddenly, the Super Destroyer hits the ring! Spear! At the announcers’ desk, Pringle says that so far no one has accepted his challenge for tonight.

OR: 73

The camera finds Scott Hall and B.G. James backstage. Hey, yo! Hall tells us that not only will he beat Jeff Jarrett this Sunday to become the World champion, but he’s going to become a double champion because after tonight he’s going to be one half of the Tag Team champions. James points out that with each match against the Road Warriors he’s come closer and closer to winning the titles, and eventually he’s going to get the job done.

OR: 79

In another part of the building, Curt Hennig accepts Percy Pringle’s challenge. He says he’s beaten everyone in the business, so this Super Destroyer won’t be any different than all the rest.

OR: 80

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. B.G. James & Scott Hall (with Vince Russo): After ten minutes of mostly SEX, Animal makes the hot tag to Hawk, who proceeds to dominate both James and Hall. He signals for the Doomsday Device, but suddenly TAKA Michinoku and Sonny Siaki run in from the locker room and attack the Road Warriors. Oh, and Russo climbs into the ring as well. The referee calls for the bell as all five members of SEX beat down the Road Warriors.

Winner: no contest due to interference

OR: 78

CR: 77

MQ: 79

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 64 to 68.)

Curt Hennig vs. Super Destroyer (with Percy Pringle): The fans boo Super Destroyer and Pringle as loud as I’ve ever heard in the TNA Asylum. God, they hate Georgia. If it had been a Florida jersey, there would have been a riot. Despite Hennig’s reputation, this one’s over quickly. A Spear from Super Destroyer finishes him in less than four minutes.

Winner: Super Destroyer

OR: 81

CR: 85

MQ: 73

OR: 73

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 3502

Best segment: TAKA Michinoku over Jody Fleisch (83)

Worst segment: Alicia Webb over April (38)

Best match: TAKA Michinoku over Jody Fleisch (83)

Wednesday, March 19, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Joey Styles and Barney Sommers

Styles: Hello, everyone, and welcome to Total Nonstop Action! I’m Joey Styles.

Sommers: And I’m Barney “winter, spring, and” Sommers.

Styles: Um, you’ve had better ones. Tonight is a special night, as we have two title matches tonight. First, Jeff Jarrett will defend the NWA World title against Brian Lawler, and in the main event B.G. James and Sonny Siaki will challenge the Road Warriors for the NWA Tag Team titles.

Sommers: James finally got the partner of his choosing to take on the Road Warriors this week, so we’ll see if the outcome is any different than when he teamed with TAKA Michinoku last night.

Styles: Also tonight, commissioner Vince Russo has signed a match between Curt Hennig and Ron Killings.

Sommers: As far as I know, there’s no issue between them. But they’re both competitors, so it should be a good match.

Styles: Also – can you believe this, Barney? – America’s Most Wanted has asked for and received another Hardcore Handicap match against Malice.

Sommers: Well, no one ever said America’s Most Wanted was Ivy League material. In fact, I’ve never heard whether or not they graduated from kindergarten.

Styles: Earlier tonight we got these words from Percy Pringle regarding that match. Roll the footage.

The video begins with Pringle already at a full belly laugh. He says he can’t believe that Harris and Storm wanted another beating at the hands of Malice. If it’s a beating they want, then that’s what they’re going to get. Tonight he’s not going to let Malice pin either man until long after the paramedics arrive to take them to the hospital.

OR: 69

Hardcore Handicap match: America’s Most Wanted vs. Malice (with Percy Pringle): Just like last night, AMW brings out trash cans full of all sorts of weapons, but again they’re not able to successfully use them on Malice. Pringle slides a table into the ring, which Malice sets up, then he puts three trashcans on it. Suddenly, some music blares through the sound system, and an unfamiliar face steps through the curtain pushing a shopping cart full of goodies. Ladies and gentlemen, NEW JACK IS IN NWA: TNA! Pringle’s jaw drops, forming three extra chins. New Jack empties the contents of the cart into the ring while Malice stands waiting with a stop sign. Finally, New Jack gets in the ring and takes a shot from the sign, but he shrugs it off and nails Malice across the back with a crutch. That makes this an official New Jack Match™. New Jack reaches into his pocket and pulls out … a fork? He stabs Malice in the head, busting him wide open!

Styles: Oh my God!

New Jack picks up the guitar, and cracks it over Malice’s head. Say, what’s that hanging around New Jack’s neck? Why, it’s a staple gun! Yep, you guessed it – staple to the forehead. James Storm is back up, as New Jack props the traffic cone in Malice’s lap. Drop Kick into the traffic cone into Malice’s crotch!

Styles: Oh my God!

A close-up shows just what kind of an artist New Jack is: the staple is perfectly placed over Malice’s eyebrow, creating a somewhat permanent Rock-esque People’s Eyebrow. Harris is back up, and both he and Storm position Malice on the table as New Jack climbs to the top rope. New Jack jumps, landing on top of Malice and sending both through the table and trash cans. Harris covers Malice for the easy three count.

Winner: America’s Most Wanted

OR: 57

CR: 53

MQ: 75

Harris and Storm chase Pringle around the ring and to the back as the medics check on Malice. Meanwhile, New Jack joins America’s Most Wanted at the announcers’ desk. Fortunately, New Jack does all the talking. He issues a challenge to Pringle to find someone to team with Malice, or even do it himself, and settle things between the two teams once and for all at Spring Slam. Of course, it’s Hardcore rules.

OR: 87

(Chris Harris gained in over from 42 to 43.)

Backstage, Jeff Jarrett is lacing up his boots as he tells us about why he’s giving Brian Lawler a title shot tonight. He tells us that they grew up together, so he’s doing it as a favor to both his dad and Brian’s. However, he’s going to do everyone a favor by whipping Lawler’s punk ass.

OR: 89

Joey Styles is in the ring to introduce Ron Killings and Curt Hennig. He asks them about their upcoming match, and Killings says he doesn’t have a problem with Hennig. Hennig says that Russo booked the match for his amusement, but they’ve decided to give the fans a good, clean, hard-fought match. Styles asks who is going to win, and Hennig immediately replies that he knows he’s going to win. Killings doesn’t look so sure about that. He says The Truth is that Hennig is an old, washed-up has-been. A shoving match ensues, and a referee enters the ring just as Styles leaves.

OR: 79

Ron Killings vs. Curt Hennig: The referee calls for the bell, and we’re underway. However, it’s not the five-star classic they told us it’s going to be. It’s a contrast of styles, as Hennig reverts back to mat-based technical wrestling whenever he’s in control, and Killings steps it up to the fast-paced X division style he’s used to whenever he’s in command. However, the fans already know the outcome when Styles announces that five minutes remain in the match. As time ticks away, Killings takes control and takes the match tempo up a notch. However, neither is able to score a pin before the bell rings, signaling the end of the time allotted for the match. Both men take a knee, breathing heavily. They eyeball each other, and finally Hennig walks over to Killings and offers his hand. He shakes it! The two men embrace and walk back to the locker room to the applause of the crowd.

Winner: time limit draw

OR: 66

CR: 75

MQ: 74

Sonny Siaki and B.G. James are backstage. James tells Siaki that he’s glad that he’s his partner tonight. Did he blame last night’s loss on TAKA Michinoku? Russo might not like that. James tells Siaki that if something should happen, he’s got a backup plan, and it doesn’t involve either TAKA Michinoku or Vince Russo.

OR: 72

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Brian Lawler (with April): Another disappointing match, but Jarrett holds it together pretty well. Like most of Lawler’s matches, April just stands at ringside looking hot. Hey, I’ve seen her in the ring, and let me tell you – standing at ringside looking hot is what she does best. This is fairly short for a World title match, as Jarrett sets Lawler up for the Stroke in less than ten minutes.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 67

CR: 73

MQ: 77

Backstage, a cameraman finds Percy Pringle and Malice still in the trainers’ room. Malice’s head is covered with blood-soaked bandages. Pringle tells us the only reason Malice lost was because they weren’t prepared for New Jack. He says there’s no doubt they’re accepting New Jack’s challenge, so this week he’s going to be looking all over the world for someone to team with Malice. If there’s someone bigger and badder than Malice, he’s going to find him.

OR: 66

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. B.G. James & Sonny Siaki: Styles and Sommers point out that if James & Siaki win, Siaki will become the first wrestler in TNA to hold multiple titles at the same time. However, it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen. It isn’t very long before the referee loses control of the match and all four men brawl in the ring. As the ref calls for the bell, Scott Hall comes out of the back … and attacks the Road Warriors! With the numbers advantage, Hall, James, and Siaki theoretically should have delivered a beatdown … but the Road Warriors fight back! However, it’s short-lived, as TAKA Michinoku and Vince Russo slide into the ring and attack Hawk and Animal from behind with steel chairs. Ah, now we get the beatdown!

Winner: double disqualification

OR: 74

CR: 84

MQ: 81

(Scott Hall’s turn is complete, and he is now a heel. Scott gall gained in over from 74 to 80. The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 60 to 64.)

Scott Hall demands to be handed a microphone.

Hall: Hey, yo! It’s survey time. Who came here tonight to see NWA? Now, who came here tonight to see the S-E-X? Chalk up another one for the good guys! Hey, listen up. What you saw tonight is just the beginning. We’re getting the band back together. But I’ve got a special message for Jeff Jarrett. You’ve been ducking me for months. Well, you can duck no longer. My good friend, Vince Russo, has got me out of wrestling curtain-jerking comedy matches against people named “Cowboy” and “Wildcat.” He’s done signed the match for Spring Slam. That’s right – you and me for the World title. And when I win the title, in a week and a half, it will be just too sweeeeeeet!

OR: 81

OR: 74

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 3001

Best segment: Interview with Jeff Jarrett (89)

Worst segment: America’s Most Wanted over Malice (57)

Best match: Road Warriors and B.G. James & Sonny Siaki double DQ (74)

Tuesday, March 18, 2003

Last Wednesday must have been “one of those nights,” as nearly every match was better quality and had more fan interest than the overall rating reflects. Hopefully we’ll avoid having another one for quite some time.

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dino Dahl and Guido Lee

Dahl: Greetings, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of XPlosion! I’m your host, Dino Dahl, and joining me is Guido Lee.

Lee: Thanks, Dino. Tonight we’ve got another outstanding card, highlighted by a Tag Team title match between the Road Warriors and B.G. James.

Dahl: However, as of right now, James doesn’t have a tag partner!

Lee: Also, we have a X division match between Ron Killings and Jody Fleisch.

Dahl: Fleisch is probably still hurting after being assaulted by Malice last week, as well as Brian Lawler.

Lee: Yeah, we know Lawler is still injured, but he’s here tonight, and he’ll be taking on Curt Hennig.

Dahl: And speaking of Malice, earlier tonight America’s Most Wanted challenged him to a rematch from last Wednesday, only they wanted a special stipulation. Let’s take a look at that footage.

The footage begins with commissioner Vince Russo sitting at his desk writing something, when Cowboy James Storm barges in through the door.

Storm: We want a rematch!

Russo: Hey, nobody barges into my office like that! Now calm down and tell me what the hell you’re doing here.

Storm: Chris Harris and I want a rematch with Malice.

Russo: Are you crazy? He damn near destroyed both of you on Wednesday, I can’t let you get back in the ring with him.

Storm: No, you don’t understand. We have to do this. We talked to Jack, and he said …

Russo: Jack who?

Storm: Our mentor! Anyway, he said that America’s Most Wanted needs to regain their honor, and the best way to do that is to get Malice in the ring – in a Hardcore match!

Russo: Let me get this straight – some jack-off told you that you needed to have a hardcore match with Malice?

Storm: His name is Jack.

Russo: I don’t care what his name is, if you and Harris are crazy enough to ask for a Hardcore match with Malice, I’m going to give you that match tonight. There, are you happy? Now get out of my office!

OR: 69

(James Storm gained in over from 40 to 41. Malice gained in over from 59 to 60.)

After returning from a commercial break, a video featuring Sonny Siaki is shown on the screen. He thinks he’s popular with the ladies, but from the reaction of the crowd, he’s not popular with anyone.

OR: 93

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 64 to 67.)

Malice heads to the ring to get ready for his match, while Percy Pringle stops at the announcers’ desk to tell everyone that tonight will see the end of America’s Most Wanted. Not only are these two guys stupid enough to ask for a rematch with Malice, they’re stupid enough to make it a Hardcore match!

OR: 73

(Malice gained in over from 60 to 61.)

Hardcore Handicap match: America’s Most Wanted vs. Malice (with Percy Pringle): Malice is already in the ring, while both Chris Harris and James Storm come to the ring dragging a trash can full of plunder behind them. They then empty the contents of the trash cans into the ring – a handicap parking sign, a fire extinguisher, a Singapore cane, the trashcan lids, and eventually the trashcans themselves are tossed into the ring before AMW climbs in. This shows poor strategy on their part, as Malice has the handicapped parking sign in hand and greets AMW with it as soon as they enter. AMW turns the tide, when James Storm picks up the fire extinguisher and sprays Malice with it. Storm holds Malice while Harris gets the Singapore cane. He tries to hit Malice, but he moves, and Storm is hit instead, knocking him to the floor. Harris turns around, and Malice grabs him by the throat. He spies a trash can, and delivers a Choke Slam on Harris on top of the trash can, which is flattened. The referee counts the easy pinfall.

Winner: Malice

OR: 64

CR: 45

MQ: 83

Backstage, Curt Hennig tells us that he knows from watching Total Nonstop Action that Lawler suffered an injury to his ribs. Tonight he’s going to take advantage of that knowledge and make Lawler suffer.

OR: 88

Meanwhile, Ron Killings is in his dressing room talking about his match against Jody Fleisch. He says he’s beaten him before, and tonight will be no different. The Truth about Jody Fleisch: he’s a very good wrestler, but Killings has his number.

OR: 80

Curt Hennig vs. Brian Lawler (with April): Lawler still has his ribs taped as a result of the attack by Malice a week ago, but he might as well have painted a bulls eye on the bandage. Hennig goes right to work on the damaged ribs, and Lawler quickly falls victim to the Hennig Plex.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 72

CR: 72

MQ: 73

In the commissioner’s office, Vince Russo is watching the show on the monitor when there’s a knock on the door and B.G. James enters. He says he can’t find Sonny Siaki to be his partner, and he doesn’t know what he’s going to do. Russo tells him that Siaki isn’t here tonight (which draws a mild pop from the crowd), and suggests he takes TAKA Michinoku to be his partner. James doesn’t seem very enthusiastic about it, but Russo tells him that’s about the only option he’s got for tonight.

OR: 75

Jody Fleisch vs. Ron Killings: A very good X division match, but Fleisch is obviously still slowed by Malice’s assault last week. This allows Killings to control most of the match, setting Fleisch up for the Truth Or Consequences for the pin. Afterwards, the two shake hands as a sign of respect.

Winner: Ron Killings

OR: 80

CR: 76

MQ: 84

NWA Tag Team title match: Road Warriors © vs. B.G. James & TAKA Michinoku (with Vince Russo): This is James and Michinoku’s first match as a team, and it’s fairly obvious that James doesn’t really want to be teamed with him in the first place. Even though Russo tries to help TAKA out whenever he’s in the ring, it’s clear that he’s no match for the strength of the Road Warriors. TAKA tries an Irish Whip, but Hawk reverses, and Russo inadvertently hits TAKA with a chair. Tag to Animal. Hawk knocks James to the floor, then delivers a Doomsday Device to TAKA for the pin.

Winner: Road Warriors

OR: 81

CR: 79

MQ: 84

(The NWA Tag Team titles have gained in image from 54 to 60.)

OR: 77

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 3005

Best segment: Video of Sonny Siaki (93)

Worst segment: Malice over America’s Most Wanted (64)

Best match: Road Warriors over B.G. James & TAKA Michinoku (81)

Wednesday, March 12, 2003

TNA Total Nonstop Action

Hosts: Joey Styles and Barney Sommers

Styles: Hello, everyone, and welcome to Total Nonstop Action! I’m Joey Styles.

Sommers: And I’m Barney “no relation to Fife” Sommers.

Styles: Ha, good one, Barney. Tonight we have for you a NWA World title match, with Jeff Jarrett defending against Ken Shamrock.

Sommers: Ken Shamrock? What has he done to deserve a title shot? It’s been weeks since he’s won a match!

Styles: Also, B.G. James continues his little quest to rid the wrestling world of the Road Warriors.

Sommers: If yesterday was any sign of things to come, James might want to find someone to watch his back.

Styles: And Sonny Siaki will be making a X title defense tonight, but I don’t know who he’s going to face.

Sommers: I have it on good authority that Siaki has reviewed the tapes from last week’s Triangle match, and he has decided that Brian Lawler deserves a title shot.

Styles: Lawler? He’s not in any shape to wrestle, after the way Malice manhandled him last night!

Sommers: Speaking of Malice, I hear that Percy Pringle has found two suckers to take up his challenge.

Styles: Yesterday on XPlosion, Pringle challenged any two wrestlers in TNA to take on Malice here tonight. Earlier today, we got these words from Malice and Percy Pringle.

On the video screen, the taped interview is shown. Pringle tells us that he’s found two challengers. Malice looks confused, until Pringle tells him that the challengers are America’s Most Wanted, James Storm and Chris Harris. Malice smiles as Pringle begins laughing hysterically.

OR: 59

Handicap match: America’s Most Wanted vs. Malice (with Percy Pringle): Harris and Storm attack Malice right off the bat, but it isn’t very long before Malice uses his size and strength advantage to take control. He delivers Choke Slams in short order to both Storm and Harris before covering both to score the pin while Pringle laughs at ringside.

Winner: Malice

OR: 56

CR: 44

MQ: 82

Backstage, Sonny Siaki talks about what a tough competitor Brian Lawler is and how there’s no one more deserving of a X title shot than him, so out of the goodness of his heart he’s granting Lawler a title match.

OR: 69

NWA X title match: Brian Lawler (with April) vs. Sonny Siaki ©: Lawler limps to the ring with his ribs bandaged as a result of last night’s attack by Malice. As one would expect, Siaki targets the ribs, and Lawler doesn’t put up much of a fight. Because of Lawler’s health, it’s basically a squash match, with Siaki landing the Siakalypse for the pin.

Winner: Sonny Siaki

OR: 66

CR: 65

MQ: 83

B.G. James is out for his match, but before heading to the ring, he stopped at the announcers’ desk. He tells Hawk he had no business interfering in his match with Animal yesterday, and tells him that tonight is payback time.

OR: 75

Road Warrior Hawk vs. B.G. James: Much like the match last night, the Road Warrior dominates James for much of the match. However, the match reaches a surprising finish out of nowhere when Hawk charges into the corner and James moves. James then rolls up Hawk with a handful of tights and both feet on the middle rope, but the referee sees neither of these things and counts the pinfall. Afterwards, James tries to escape, but Road Warrior Animal sneaks up behind him and tosses him back in the ring. A two-on-one beatdown ensues, before the Road Warriors deliver a Doomsday Device on James.

Winner: B.G. James

OR: 66

CR: 75

MQ: 74

(B.G. James gained in over from 73 to 74.)

In his dressing room, Jeff Jarrett says he admires Ken Shamrock for never giving up, even under the adverse situation he’s in. He shows up every night, ready to compete. Jarrett knows he’s in for a good match tonight, and knows that if Shamrock wins he will be a deserving NWA champion.

OR: 85

NWA World title match: Jeff Jarrett © vs. Ken Shamrock: Despite the fact that it’s a World title match, Shamrock still seems as though his mind and heart aren’t fully into the match. That works to Jarrett’s advantage, as Shamrock takes too much time between moves. Eventually, Jarrett hits the Stroke for the pinfall.

Winner: Jeff Jarrett

OR: 71

CR: 77

MQ: 82

Shamrock picks up his things from the locker room and heads out to the parking lot. He opens the door to toss his bags in and finds Alicia Webb sitting behind the wheel! She tells him to get in. He does, and they drive off into the night as Styles and Sommers ask what this means.

OR: 80

OR: 70

Rating: 2.00

Attendance: 3001

Best segment: Interview with Jeff Jarrett (85)

Worst segment: Malice over America’s Most Wanted (56)

Best match: Jeff Jarrett over Ken Shamrock (71)

Tuesday, March 11, 2003

The latest casualty of the declining wrestling industry is NWA Wildside’s television show, which was dropped by America One.

TNA XPlosion

Hosts: Dino Dahl and Guido Lee

Dahl: Greetings, TNA fans, and welcome to another edition of XPlosion! I’m your host, Dino Dahl, and joining me is Guido Lee.

Lee: Thanks, Dino. Tonight we’ve got another outstanding card, highlighted by an X division matchup between Jody Fleisch and Brian Lawler.

Dahl: Also, Ken Shamrock will be taking on Curt Hennig in our main event. You know, Guido, Shamrock lost to B.G. James on Total Nonstop Action last Wednesday, extending his current losing streak.

Lee: Speaking of B.G. James, tonight he’ll be taking on Road Warrior Animal!

Dahl: That could headline any arena in the country.

Lee: In the world!

Dahl: Yeah! And our opening match will feature a special challenge match. Last Wednesday, Scott Hall beat Cowboy James Storm. Tonight, Storm’s tag team partner, Wildcat Chris Harris, has challenged Hall to defend the honor of America’s Most Wanted.

Lee: Earlier, Scott Hall had these words to say about that challenge.

On the video screen, Hall appears to be walking in from the parking lot earlier tonight, when an unnamed intern tells him of Harris’ challenge. Hall seems shocked that Harris would dare challenge him after what he did to James Storm last week, then he becomes extremely irritated that he has to waste his time with punks like America’s Most Wanted. You know, they say sudden mood changes are a sign that someone is intoxicated …

OR: 78

Upon returning from a commercial break, a video highlighting Sonny Siaki is shown on the video screen, drawing a large response from the fans, who boo vehemently at the video.

OR: 97

(Sonny Siaki gained in over from 60 to 64.)

Scott Hall vs. Chris Harris (with James Storm): A surprisingly good match, but Hall dominates Harris much as he did Storm just six days earlier. Among the many similarities to that match, Hall once again scores the clean pinfall after the Outsider’s Edge.

Winner: Scott Hall

OR: 63

CR: 47

MQ: 80

Backstage, B.G. James tells us how much he enjoyed watching the Road Warriors as a child. Now he’s grown up and has become a superstar in the world of wrestling, and yet the Road Warriors are still around! They’re much too old to still be participating in wrestling matches. So he’s taking it on himself to retire them once and for all, starting tonight with Animal.

OR: 81

Jody Fleisch vs. Brian Lawler (with April): Here’s a point to remember, kids – X division match = good match. It doesn’t matter how formulaic they are, they’re still good matches, and this one’s no different. There is something entirely unique about this match – Malice. The referee is forced to call for the bell after Malice runs in from the back and just destroys both competitors, as Percy Pringle stands at ringside, laughing at each Choke Slam Malice delivers to Fleisch and Lawler.

Winner: no contest due to interference

OR: 76

CR: 68

MQ: 84

Finally, Pringle grabs a microphone and climbs into the ring. The medics pull Lawler and Fleisch to safety, under the menacing stares of Malice. Pringle tells us that Malice is the most dominating wrestler he’s ever managed, including The Undertaker and Kane, ohhh yessss! He then issues an open challenge to any two wrestlers to step into the ring with Malice tomorrow night on Total Nonstop Action.

OR: 75

(Malice gained in over from 58 to 59.)

Backstage, Curt Hennig talks about Ken Shamrock’s recent string of bad luck. He says he’d love to help him out, but not tonight. Hennig plans on doing everything in his power to extend Shamrock’s losing streak by one more match.

OR: 78

Road Warrior Animal vs. B.G. James: It comes as no surprise to me that this isn’t a five-star technical masterpiece, but it’s still a decent match. Animal dominates until James ducks a Running Clothesline, which inadvertently knocks down the referee. While Animal checks on the ref, James gets a chair from ringside. Animal turns around, and gets his lights turned out by a big chair shot from James. James drags the referee over and covers Animal. A slow count, but it doesn’t matter since Animal is out cold. After the pin, Road Warrior Hawk comes into the ring and begins pounding on James while Animal recovers and gets back into the fight. James is no match for both Road Warriors. Doomsday Device! The Road Warriors get a small measure of revenge on B.G. James.

Winner: B.G. James

OR: 73

CR: 72

MQ: 74

As if we needed another reminder of who’s running the show, a video is shown on the big screen featuring Vince Russo and TAKA Michinoku. The video ends, not surprisingly enough, with TAKA helping Russo beat Bob Armstrong to become commissioner.

OR: 92

(TAKA Michinoku gained in over from 70 to 74. Vince Russo gained in over from 78 to 79.)

Curt Hennig vs. Ken Shamrock: As if facing Hennig wasn’t a big enough challenge, Shamrock comes to the ring shaking his head and looking to the floor. Yep, the losses are really getting to him. Shamrock holds his own, but he’s not focused very well, which leads to Hennig setting him up for the Hennig Plex and the pin. Afterwards, Hennig tries to encourage Shamrock, but he pushes him away and returns backstage.

Winner: Curt Hennig

OR: 74

CR: 71

MQ: 78

The camera cuts to the parking lot, where Ken Shamrock tosses his bags in the car and begins to drive off. The camera turns back to the doorway, where Alicia Webb is watching Shamrock drive away.

OR: 78

OR: 78

Rating: 1.35

Attendance: 3003

Best segment: Video featuring Sonny Siaki (97)

Worst segment: Scott Hall over Chris Harris (63)

Best match: Jody Fleisch vs. Brian Lawler ends when Malice runs in (76)