Hardcore Weapon Smasher

Check out "Freedom Fighters" and "Breakin" from the new album.

I'd check out Moby's earlier stuff.

Like The Flaming Lips, Grandaddy and Wilco.

Woman - Monica Bellucci

Man - The Smalce

Ashlee Simpson is a cow.

Girls and Boys

Coffee and TV

Tender

Everyone's got a favourite novelty song, even if they're embarrassed to admit it. Mine's got to be Detachable Penis by King Missile.

The singer Daniel Johns recorded an album with Paul Mac as The Dissociatives this year. Silverchair haven't officially split, but they're taking time off.

The best Wilco album is Being There.

Go. Buy. Now.

Damn, I thought she died. I was getting excited then.

Radiohead, Nirvana or Blur should get in. The others don't even belong near a hall of fame poll. Especially Missy Elliot and Robbie Williams.

'Mein Teil' by Rammstein. Sounds just like Justin Timberlake.

:'(

How will I turn into a Harmonica star? >_>

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Mountain Song

Stop!

Up The Beach

Classic Girl

Ocean Size

He recorded an album with help from the Flaming Lips.

Flaming Lips - Mrs. Robinson (Simon and Garfunkel)

Orgy - Blue Monday (New Order)

The Living End - Tainted Love (Soft Cell)

Godfatha is out with a ripped bicep for 7 months, Nomaster is out with a neck injury for 8 months.

Looks like the tag-team of Godfatha and Boulder won't be competing for a while.....sorry.

EWB Hellbound Preview

No. 1 Contenders Match for the EWB Jobber Title: Nathan Jones vs Protoman Version 2.5 vs ryan_the_canuck

aajj1144 and LOL vs Standard and Emad

Handicap Match: sycodmn vs Tag-Team Champions Team Sea Slug

EWB World Heavyweight Title Match: Boulder vs Kou

and much more...

The EWB Report

Talking With Head Writer Squancho McFapFap

Our top draw is Adam Ryland, so he sould be the focus of our shows.

#1 Babyface: Jeff Hardy's Stalker

#2 Babyface: Kou

#3 Babyface: Fitzy

#4 Babyface: Johnny Perfect

#5 Babyface: Diego

#1 Heel: Adam Ryland

#2 Heel: sycodmn

#3 Heel: Thuganomic

#4 Heel: Boulder

#5 Heel: LivingLegend

Nomaster's gimmick isn't working.

ryan_the_canuck's gimmick isn't working.

Lafunkenstein's gimmick isn't working.

Protoman Version 5's gimmick is killing his heat.

EWB Business

Public Image: 98%

Size: National

Money: $90,105,300

Risk Level: 75%

Sponsors

Nintendo

Electronic Arts

Snickers

Rolling Stone

Feuds

Major Feuds:

Kou vs sycodmn (100) (no change)

Fitzy vs Thuganomic (97) (no change)

CadeSydal vs Johnny Perfect (80) (no change)

Minor Feuds:

Matthew vs Deanitude (34) (no change)

Cortez vs Nomaster (50) (no change)

Current Champions

EWB World Heavyweight Champion: Boulder (Won 04 October)

EWB Tag-Team Champions: Team Sea Slug (Won 04 October)

EWB European Champion: sirdavinator (Won 04 October)

EWB Jobber Champion: AntPaulseno (Won 04 October)

EWB Hellbound

*The show starts with a spectacular pyrotechnics display*

Tanc: What a show we have for you tonight, Hellbound viewers!

Marty: Indeed we do Tanc. The EWB Jobber Champion will be decided in a 10-Man Battle Royal, anyone can win.

Tanc: Also the reunited DnD take on Team Sea Slug for the tag straps, and in what should be an interesting encounter, the patriotic American Matthew attempts to stop Deanitude, who has a hatred of the American race, in his tracks.

Marty: But to tell us more about tonight's show, please welcome EWB owner and CEO Adam Ryland!

Adam Ryland Speaks

'Here Comes The Money' rings out through the arena and Adam Ryland makes his entrance.

Ryland: Welcome to the single greatest show on earth. We have a host of great athletes to entertain you tonight, much better than all you untalented schmucks out there.

*The crowd boo and jeer Ryland*

Ryland: I bet you're all waiting to hear about the main event, so I'll end the suspense right now. The main event will be a four corners match for the EWB World Heavyweight Title. The participants will be Kou, Fitzy, sycodmn and Boulder. On with the show.

*Adam Ryland leaves as the crowd throw all their rubbish at him*

Road Agent Notes:

None

Overall Rating: 92%

EWB Jobber Title Match

10-Man Battle Royal

All 10 men are in the ring. Standard whips Protoman Version 2.5 into the ropes, and clotheslines him to the mat. Blade punches BigPoppaX, and throws him over the ropes! BigPoppaX is eliminated. Emad runs at Blade, but Blade suplexes him over the ropes! Blade gets his second elimination. Nathan Jones powerbombs AntPaulseno. RTC low blows Standard, which sends him over the ropes. AntPaulseno revovers from the powerbomb dealt to him by Nathan Jones, and backdrops Blade over the ropes! Blade is out. GCCWolverine clotheslines Protoman to the outside, Nathan Jones is also eliminated after a headbutt from RTC. LOL tries to eliminate AntPaulseno, but Paulseno holds on to the bottom rope! RTC catches LOL with a kick to the chin, and sends him over the ropes. LOL is eliminated. AntPaulseno, GCCWolverine and ryan_the_canuck remain. AntPaulseno and GCCWolverine try to throw RTC over the top rope, but RTC holds on and throws Wolverine over! AntPaulseno stuns RTC with a knee lift, then hits the Paulseno Driver. RTC is thrown over the top rope, which makes AntPaulseno the new EWB Jobber Champion!

Winner: AntPaulseno

Road Agent Notes:

The EWB Jobber Title has gained in image. ryan_the_canuck is losing overness because of his weak gimmick. Protoman Version 2.5 is losing overness because of his weak gimmick.

Overall Rating: 48

Crowd Reaction: 34

Match Quality: 62

Special Guest Referee: aajj1144

Matthew Vs Deanitude

Matthew strides down the ramp waving the stars and stripes. He is ambushed by 'The Lost Soul' Deanitude, and is sent flying into the guardrail. The Lost Soul grabs the American flag and cracks it over the back of Matthew, then throws the two pieces into the crowd. He grabs Matthew by the scruff of the neck, and leads him to the ring. He throws him under the bottom rope and enters the ring. Matthew takes The Lost Soul down with a missile dropkick from nowhere! One, two, kickout. He goes for a suplex, but The Lost Soul counters. He chokes Matthew viciously, and aajj1144 threatens him with disqualification. While The Lost Soul is busy threatening the ref, Matthew rolls him up! One, two, three! What a quick count! Deanitude is beside himself with fury. He slides out of the ring, grabs a chair, and pulls aajj1144 out of the ring. The Lost Soul smashes the chair over aajj1144’s head, and does the same to Matthew. Deanitude has sent a strong message tonight!

Winner: Matthew via rollup

Road Agent Notes:

Matthew gained 1 point of overness from this match.

Overall Rating: 53

Crowd Reaction: 35

Match Quality: 71

Cortez Vs Nomaster

Cortez slams Nomaster to the mat hard. 1,2, kickout. Nomaster recovers and powerbombs Cortez. Butterfly suplex by Cortez. The momentum is switching from Cortez to Nomaster here. Spear! Cortez is down. Nomaster locks on the Hartt Breaker, and Cortez taps. We have a winner!

Winner: Nomaster via Hartt Breaker

Road Agent Notes:

Nomaster is losing overness because of his weak gimmick.

Overall Rating: 54

Crowd Reaction: 46

Match Quality: 66

JHS Introduces DnD

Jeff Hardy’s Stalker comes down to the ring with a mic.

Jeff Hardy’s Stalker: I am happy to announce that I am now managing the team that will win the tag-team titles later on tonight, DnD!

*Darloboy and Diego join JHS in the ring*

Darloboy: We need JHS to help us go that one step further, and take the tag-titles.

*DnD leave with their new manager*

Road Agent Notes:

Darloboy gained 2 points of overness from this segment. Jeff Hardy's Stalker lost 3 points of overness from this segment.

Overall Rating: 68%

EWB European Title Match (3-Way Elimination Match)

Kaneanite Vs ADGray Vs sirdavinator

ADGray comes down to the ring with a mic.

ADGray: Come down to the ring you bastards! I want to beat the shit out of both of you!

*Kaneanite appears, also with a mic*

Kaneanite: Arll coom and knock that attitude oot of ya.

*Kaneanite runs down to the ring and jumps on the ring apron*

ADGray pulls him over the top rope, and uses an armbar takedown. Kaneanite ducks ADGray’s punch, and takes him down with a spinning bulldog. sirdavinator hits the ring and clotheslines Kaneanite, then ADGray. ADGray spears Kaneanite then uses a brainbuster suplex. SD drops a leg over Kaney’s chest. One, two, three! Kaneanite has been eliminated by SD. ADGray lifts SD with a suplex, then turns it into a front slam. 1,2, kickout. SD blocks a punch from ADGray. SD Bomb! 1,2,3. sirdavinator has won the EWB European Title!

Winner: sirdavinator via SD Bomb

Road Agent Notes:

The EWB European Title has gained in image.

Overall Rating: 61

Crowd Reaction: 54

Match Quality: 68

Four Corners Match

NYJetFan86 Vs wwe_ps2_gamer Vs Hellfire Vs Big Sheep

Big Sheep slams NYJetFan86 to the canvas. 1,2, kickout. Sheep tags out to Hellfire. Slingshot clothesline by Hellfire to Jet. Hellfire misses an elbow, then tags wwe_ps2_gamer in. Running dropkick on wpg, then a legsweep from nowhere. Hellfire tags in Jet. Jet clotheslines wpg to the mat. Double Underhook Facebuster shakes the ring! Jet goes for the pin, 1,2,3! NYJetFan86 wins!

Winner: NYJetFan86 via Double Underhook Facebuster

Road Agent Notes:

None

Overall Rating: 66

Crowd Reaction: 60

Match Quality: 73

Four Corners Match

Godfatha Vs LivingLegend Vs lafunkenstein Vs Thuganomic

Godfatha and Thuganomic start off in the ring. Big dropkick from Thuganomic, 1, kickout. Godfatha tags in LivingLegend. LL tries to spear Thuggy, but he dives out of the way and the ref gets speared. LL tries again, and succeeds in spearing Thuggy. Thuggy crawls to the side of the ring and tags in lafunkenstein. A powerslam from Funky floors LL. Funky locks LL in a headlock. The minutes tick by. Finally LL powers out of the hold, and tags in Thuggy. Funky whips Thuggy into the corner, runs after him and runs into a raised boot. Thuggy uses a roll-up, with his feet on the second rope! The ref counts one, two, three! What a match!

Winner: Thuganomic via roll-up

Road Agent Notes:

Lafunkenstein is losing overness because of his weak gimmick.

Overall Rating: 75

Crowd Reaction: 79

Match Quality: 67

Cade Goes Crazy

Backstage, CadeSydal is wandering around looking for someone to beat up. He spots Johnny Perfect, and starts to run towards him. Johnny Perfect is caught by surprise, and jumps out of the way. CadeSydal grabs him and rams his head into the wall. Cade sets up a table, and suplexes Perfect through it! Perfect falls victim to the Nightcap, then Cade locks on the 69 Stretch! Paramedics crowd the area, and struggle to pull Cade off Perfect. You can bet Perfect will be looking for revenge after this encounter.

Road Agent Notes:

None

Overall Rating: 77%

EWB Tag-Team Titles Match (Ladder Match)

DnD w/ Jeff Hardy’s Stalker Vs Team Sea Slug

Diego and GoGo Yubari are up first. GoGoLove locks Diego in a headlock, but Darloboy enters the ring and breaks it up. He leaves the ring. JHS slides the ladder into the ring while stokerino is tagged in by GoGoLove. Diego whips stoker into the ladder, then drops an elbow on him. GoGoLove comes in to help stoker, and Darloboy comes in to help Diego. All four men are in the ring! GoGoLove hits Darloboy with the Shibuya Powder Keg! Darloboy is tossed out of the ring. Cause and Effect on Diego and suddenly both members of DnD are out of the ring! JHS starts kicking GoGoLove and stokerino but she is grabbed by the hair and tossed out of the ring as well. GoGoLove sets up the ladder while stoker retrieves the Tag-Team Title belts! Team Sea Slug are the new champs.

Winners: Team Sea Slug

Road Agent Notes:

None

Overall Rating: 77

Crowd Reaction: 74

Match Quality: 80

EWB World Heavyweight Title Match (Four Corners Elimination Match)

Kou Vs sycodmn Vs Boulder Vs Fitzy

Boulder chops Fitzy, then whips him into the ropes. sycodmn pulls down the top rope and Fitzy goes flying to the outside. Fitzy tags in Kou. The cheers start. Kou hits Boulder with a flying elbow. syco is tagged in by Boulder. syco stuns Kou with a knee lift then rolls him up. One, two, kickout. That was a close one. syco signals for the Jack Daniels Driver XVII! Out of nowhere Kou floors syco with a Super Kick! 1,2,3! Syco has been eliminated! And he is not happy. He headbutts Kou, then is ordered out of the ring by the ref. Fitzy kicks Kou, then Kou reminds him that they are both faces. Kou tags in Boulder. Boulder hits Fitzy with a series of kicks, then a diving headbutt. Boulder gets the pinfall on Fitzy! Only two remain, Boulder and Kou. Kou reverses a Boulder hammerlock, then uses a double axe handle off the top rope to take him down. Kou signals for the R-Kou-O and the crowd go nuts. sycodmn creates a distraction in the crowd and enters the ring. He cracks a chair over the head of Kou! Here it comes, Tales Of Brave Ulysses from Boulder. The ref didn’t see any of this, and counts the pinfall! A tainted win to Boulder means he is the new World Heavyweight Champion!

Winner: Boulder via Tales Of Brave Ulysses

Road Agent Notes:

The EWB World Heavyweight Title has lost image.

Overall Rating: 85

Crowd Reaction: 89

Match Quality: 76

Tanc: A historical night, Marty.

Marty: Right you are, Tanc. Boulder overcomes the odds and defeats Kou to become World Champ, Johnny Perfect beaten to a pulp by CadeSydal, a jobber battle royal, tonight had everything.

Tanc: We’ll see you next week, on EWB Hellbound.

**********

Overall Card Rating: 70%

We got a 5.29 rating for 'EWB Hellbound'!

The attendance level was 3510 people.

We made $105300 from ticket sales.

Recap:

AntPaulseno won a ten-man Battle Royal

Matthew d. Deanitude

Nomaster d. Cortez

sirdavinator d. Kaneanite and ADGray

NYJetFan86 d. wwe_ps2_gamer, Big Sheep and Hellfire

Thuganomic d. lafunkenstein, Godfatha and LivingLegend

Team Sea Slug d. DnD

Boulder d. sycodmn, Fitzy and Kou

**********

EWB Hellbound Preview

A massive show involving everyone in the entire promotion. Includes all this and more:

10-Man Battle Royal for the EWB Jobber Title

DnD Vs Team Sea Slug for the EWB Tag-Team Titles

Kaneanite Vs ADGray Vs sirdavinator for the EWB European Title

Plus a special announcement from EWB CEO Adam Ryland.

The Roster

Main Event

Face

Fitzy (90)

Kou (92)

Heel

Boulder (86)

Godfatha (80)

LivingLegend (80)

sycodmn (95)

Thuganomic (87)

Upper Midcard

Face

Diego (70)

Johnny Perfect (70)

Tweener

GoGo Yubari (79)

Lafunkenstein (75)

stokerino (75)

Heel

CadeSydal (71)

Midcard

Tweener

NYJetFan86 (60)

Heel

Hellfire (63)

Lower Midcard

Face

Big Sheep (55)

Darloboy (50)

Kaneanite (50)

Tweener

sirdavinator (55)

Heel

ADGray (50)

wwe_ps2_gamer (50)

Opener

Face

Cortez (40)

Heel

Nomaster (45)

Jobber

Face

aajj1144 (19)

AntPaulseno (28)

Blade 3310 (33)

GCCWolverine (36)

LOL (23)

Matthew (17)

ryan_the_canuck (18)

Heel

BigPoppaX (23)

Deanitude (30)

Emad (34)

Nathan Jones (14)

Protoman Version 2.5 (25)

Standard (27)

Non-Wrestlers

Adam Ryland (100)

Managers

Jeff Hardy's Stalker (100)

Billy Talent is awesome, and I can't recommend just one of their songs, cause I love every single track!  They are, like, ear orgasmic.  I have gotten so many people in my little town hooked on Billy Talent it is not even funny.  Went to Warped Tour, made three new fans.  Pass CDs around with Billy Talent tracks on them, everyone wants more.  Billy Talent is one of the top 3 best bands to come out of Canada, eh.

3 Days Grace are canadian?  They are good, too.  I like their whole album. 

As you can tell, I am not too sure of how many bands are actually from Canada, but let me say, they all pale in comparison to the almighty rock gods, BILLY TALENT!!!

←

Twiggy Ramirez from Marilyn Manson's band joined A Perfect Circle last year.

Probot - Dave Grohl's side project.

Eagles Of Death Metal - Josh Homme's side project.