lafunky xxvii

11-2-04

Attendance – 2509

1. HUSSah!!

For the second week running we open up the show with another bout featuring that lovable ‘Barbaric Berserker’ Jimmy Jacobs. His opponent is none other than that forgotten misogynist Kid Kash. Just for the benefit of some fans, Jacobs’ love for you is not like a truck. Jacobs’ comes out to the Touch, which apparently isn’t just a Van Halen rip off. Meh, who cares. All I know is it’s from Transformers, which instantly makes it badass. There is a quiet HUSSing from the crowd as he enters the ring, which is better than last week. I guess they are catching on. Jacobs exhibits some very nice offence in the match, and shows he actually has some ring skills to go with his gimmick. He nails a nice headscissors to DDT, a sweet roundhouse kick and a double stomp off the top, which crushes the ribs of Kash. But in typical comedy style, Jacobs loses the momentum again after going for a choke-lift, but he can’t pick Kash off the mat. He tries with all his might to lift Kash up, but ends up collapsing to his knees. Kash bounces off the ropes and gives him a vicious dropkick to the face. Kash goes to work on the less experienced Jacobs, and gets a near fall with a diving hurricanrana. Kash nails a few more trademark moves and then goes for his Money Maker, but Jacobs rolls down the back. He grabs Kash round the neck, flips off the turnbuckles and slams him down. Cover, 1,2, 3! Jimmy Jacobs picks up another big win.

Jimmy Jacobs bt Kid Kash (69/54/84) **1/2

Kid Kash lost overness. Jimmy Jacobs gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

2. I Don’t Know But I’ve Been Told, Eskimo Pussy’s Mighty Cold!

After the early commercial break the 4LK music hits and we get a rare appearance of the Kru, but they aren’t joined by James. Oh, so it’s the forgotten members of the Live Kru. They are dressed a tad differently this time. Killings leads out the troops in classic Army fatigues. Killings kind of looks like new skool Big Bossman, but cooler, and obviously blacker. He leads down Dutt and Shark Boy. SB is wearing an army helmet, which looks pretty funny. Dutt is at the back of the line, waving a flag, which has 4LK 4TV written on it. All three men step inside the ring. Killings has the stick.

KILLINGS – “Attent hut! (The troops stand at attention). Listen here TNA, we are out here on a mission. It’s Operation 4LK-4TV. As you may have noticed the three of us haven’t been on television much these past few months, and whilst B-Jizzle has been on the show EVERY SINGLE WEEK. (The crowd cheer – they love B-Jizzle). Well we are not happy about it. Why should he be given that time and not us? (Shark Boy and Dutt look a tad confused about Killings’ rant). This is what we call playa hatin’. Yep. Don Callis is hatorizin’ us and not booking us on TV. Well the 4 Live Kruism stops here, because we are gunna take some affirmative action. See if Callis won’t book us then we’ll book ourselves. Next up will be the first phase of the ‘4LK-4TV’ campaign. We’ve booked ourselves in a 6-man tag team match against a select team, handpicked by us. Company march!”

The Kruers march like they are about to leave the ring, but stay inside and strip off some of the army gear ready for their match.

85%

3. Phase One Complete

With the declaration of war compete, Dutt, Shark Boy and Killings get ready for their match. Their opponents come out to some generic heavy metal music, but the crowd don’t seem to recognise them. In traditional TNA style they are announced with fake names, but according to the internet dirt sheets they were ‘Spyder’ Nate Webb, Josh Prohibition and Adam Flash. The match itself wasn’t bad, despite little crowd reaction. The randoms played the heels in the match, although the fans were a little confused with Killings. He was quite vicious with his opponents, stomping at them. He wasn’t stiffing them, just being pretty violent, which is out of character. It’s your basic squash match overall. All three Kruers get a chance to show their trademark offence, including a nice assbite to 720 DDT by Shark Boy and Dutt. Maybe they’ll give those two a slot in the X-Division as a part of Operation ‘4LK-4TV’. This short match is finished off when Killings nails the Front Face Suplex on J-Pro. Afterwards, Killings leads the troops back up the ramp, flagging waving behind.

4LK (Killings, SB and Dutt) bt Josh Prohibition, Adam Flash and Nate Webb (59/47/72) *1/4

4. Daniels Prophesises

We cut now to a video promo of Christopher Daniels. He’s standing at an dark altar in full clergy clobber. He looks up into the camera.

DANIELS – “Low Ki, you had no business calling me out and claiming I had something to do with your attack two weeks ago at Bound For Glory. I am a man of the cloth and a man of honour. I don’t go for those underhanded tactics, I settle things in the ring as you found out last week. I showed you who was the better man. However I am sure our paths have not crossed for the last time. You see the prophecy has something in store for you. You have been chosen, Low Ki. You have been chosen for a very special role. You could’ve been great Low Ki. You could’ve fought on our side, but instead you chose to disrespect us. You will rue the day that you disrespected the Fallen Angel and the prophecy. We are here Low Ki, and we will destroy anyone that gets in our way. The answer was right in front of you, but you answered the wrong question. I don’t fight alone Low Ki, and you will experience your downfall at the hands of myself, my brothers and my sisters.”

The camera zooms out and we see a wider shot of Daniels. Behind him stands the monsterous figure of Abyss.

DANIELS – “The count of converted sinners is one, and it’s forever growing. Beware Low Ki, beware.”

92%

Christopher Daniels gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

5. CM Gets Punk’d

After an exhilarating Christopher Daniels promo we get what should be a very good singles match. It sees up and comer John Walters taking on CM Punk of the Gathering. CM Punk is accompanied down to the ring by his comrade Julio Dinero. It’s been obvious of the tensions between the two men, especially since it seems they have been left without guidance from their mentor Raven. Once the smoke clears and we get down to some wrasslin’ its actually pretty disappointing. These two should be capable of atleast a *** match, but it seems that the two haven’t brought their A-games tonight. I’m sure that they could put on a better match somewhere down the line. Walters nails a Fisherman Buster, but Punk somehow gets the shoulder up at 2. The crowd start really getting behind Punk and he responds by hitting a springboard clothesline. Punk gets whipped into the corner, but he slingshots over Walters. Dragon suplex! Vince Russo, who is with Walters, grabs his leg and puts it on the bottom rope causing the break. This brings Dinero into the fray. He charges round the ring to get Russo, but he scrambles into the ring. Dinero follows, which distracts the referee and Punk. Punk starts yelling at Dinero, telling him to stay out of the match. Punk turned around straight into a Missile Dropkick from Walters. The rookie is quick to capitalise, rolling Punk up and getting the 3 count. As Russo and Walters walk up the ramp, yep you’ve guessed it, Dinero and Punk argue.

John Walters bt CM Punk (63/52/75) *1/2

6. Challengizzle On The Intervizzle

After the crew have finished setting up the set, BG James makes his way down to the ring to a rousing reception from the Nashville crowd. He gives the crowd a little treat, moonwalking to his seat then beering himself, then getting on the mic.

JAMES – “Well hello there TNA (takes a sip of beer) and welcome to another edition of Emmy nominated B-Jizzle Intervizzle. I am your host, Mr BG James esquire, and dizzam, this week we have a high profile guest. Tonight’s guest will be NWA World champion, Pho-nominal, AJ Styles!”

AJ Styles comes out to the ring to a huge pop from the crowd. That feud with Jarrett really helped him establish himself as the top wrestler in TNA. He is wearing his standard vest and bandana. Styles jumps over the top rope, flashes the fans the belt and takes his seat next to James.

JAMES – “Firstly, congrats on winning the strap and couple of weeks back. You showed us all why they call you phenomenal. But enough of that’s girly shit, lets talk about the stuff people want to hear. February 29th TNA will hold it’s second supercard, and no doubt you’ll be top of the bill, but the question remains, who will you be facing?”

STYLES – “Well you know where I come from you don’t go out looking for trouble, but when it comes looking for you, you sure as hell don’t run away from it. To be honest, I don’t care who I face because I think that I can run with anyone in TNA, so if you want a piece, come get it.”

James is about to continue with another question, but the music of Raven rings through the arena. The cult icon steps through the curtain and makes his way to the ring. He steps inside and requests the mic from James.

RAVEN – “You know two weeks ago at Bound For Glory I won a big battle myself. It was a battle against my sins and my past, and I overcame those demons, so now it is time for me to realise my future and realise my destiny. Styles, you’re good, in fact you’re great, but I don’t think even you can take out the new Raven. I’m not the same man I was when we fought in the past. I’m a changed man, and I’m onto a fresh page in my life, and there would be no better tale to tell on that page than when I realise my destiny and win the NWA World title.”

JAMES – “Well it sounds like trouble has come looking for you, AJ. Any response?”

Styles squares up to Raven.

STYLES – “Raven, I am a man of my word, and I will not back down to your challenge. February 29th I will defend my NWA World title against you, and I will walk out the TNA Asylum still the NWA World champion.”

After a short silence, things filter out and everyone leaves the ring, the headliner of the second PPV set.

73%

AJ Styles lost overness.

7. And The Number One Contender Is…

As we come into the home straight of this X-Division feud, we aregiven a pretty good match. Michael Shane has had his critics, but he had a good showing here against Paul London. Although we don’t really know how much of this is due to London himself. Having worked in the WWE, London should know a fair bit about carrying no talent wrestlers (BA-ZING~!). This new Franchise angle seems to have petered out, but that’s probably for the best. More emphasis on that means more TV time for Douglas, and that is not good. I wonder if we gave Rob Black a call if he’d ‘steal’ Douglas from us. London gets a near fall with a standing SSP. He goes for a hurricanrana, but Shane blocks it and rams him spine first into the turnbuckles. Shane works over the back of London, giving him a backbreaker then pushing London down over his knee. Shane rolls a Bow and Arrow submission into a roll up for a 2 count. London springs off the second rope into a Moonsault, but Shane gets his foot on the rope. Shane hits the Superkick then goes to climb to the top rope. Chris Sabin runs down to the ring, pulling out a ladder from under the ring. He slides into the ring and clocks Shane with the ladder. London gets to his feet and Sabin spins round, accidentally hitting him with the ladder. The ref has given up and throws this one out. After the match all three men brawl until they are separated by officials and road agents.

Paul London and Michael Shane went to No Contest (69/51/88) ***

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

8. Reunion

Simon and Swinger have already made their way down to ringside for their match against foe Jerry Lynn and his surprise partner. Out onto the ramp walks Jerry Lynn. He receives a nice pop from the crowd. He turns towards the curtain and waves his arm, beckoning his partner to come out. There is a brief silence then…

INTERGALACTIC PLANETARY PLANETARY INTERGALACTIC

IT’S NOVA!

Nova and Lynn runs down from the ramp and slides into the ring, which starts the match.

66%

9. An ECW Encounter

Ahh this one takes me back. Four of ECW former stars going head to head on a national scale once again. Nova hasn’t lost his touch either. That long spell in Ohio Valley must have kept him ring savvy. Nova shows us why we miss ECW, reminding us of his innovative offence, including a Iconclasm to Swinger onto the chest of Diamond. He and Lynn nails the heels with double suicide dives through the ropes, which brings a cheer from the crowd. Back inside the ring, Lynn takes Diamond apart. He whips Diamond into the corner, but Simon jumps up onto the second rope. He fakes the jumping crossbody, thinking he outsmarted Lynn. Lynn jumps up onto second rope and sunset powerbombs Diamond hard down to the mat. He rolls him up for a pin, but Swinger breaks up the cover. Simon and Swinger use some sneaky tactics to take back the advantage. They nail Nova with the Problem Solver (y’all remember that one, right?) and Simon goes for a cocky cover. 1…2…Nova kicks out! Simon can’t believe he got the shoulder up. Simon goes for the Simonizer, but Nova drops down the back. Tag to Lynn! Lynn and Nova clean house. They absolutely destroy Simon and Swinger, hitting them with wave after wave of offence. They get whipped into each other and bounce of. Simon and Swinger spin round groggily, into the arms of their opponents. Cradle Piledriver! Krytonite Krunch! Both men make the cover. 1…2…3! Lynn and Nova win. They embrace inside the ring and celebrate. On the outside Simon and Swinger walk to the back. Swinger puts his hand on Diamond shoulder, but Simon just spins around, gives him the finger and walks off.

Jerry Lynn and Nova bt Simon and Swinger (75/65/85) ***

10. Inevitably, Julio Gets Punk’d

Backstage, Julio catches Punk as he is about to leave the arena.

DINERO – “Look Punk, I’ve been thinking and we need to sort this stuff out. Now I’m sorry about how things have gone these past couple of weeks and I hope that we can both be bigger men and put it behind us and move on, hell, maybe we can go for the tag titles or something, I dunno. So what do you say?”

Dinero extends his hand to Punk, who seems reluctant at first, but then he accepts the handshake and the two embrace. Punk pulls his bag along and Dinero sets off in the other direction. Punk stops and drops his bag off his shoulder, then grabs a steel pole. He runs upto Dinero and clocks him in the back of the head with the pole. Dinero is left in a crumbled heap.

PUNK – “Tag titles? I’m going for the real gold, bitch. You just got Punk’d, bitch.”

CM Punk picks up his bag and leaves the arena.

56%

Julio Dinero gained overness. CM Punk gained overness. CM Punk’s turn is complete. He’s now a heel.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

11. Justin’s Reward

Finally we move on to our main event. Don Callis rewarded Justin Credible with this title shot tonight after defeating Erik Watts in the Cane match last week. Rumours are spreading backstage that Don Callis may add Credible to his organisation after he was impressed with the job the former ECW champion did last week. Maybe they’re looking for a new main event player after the seeming failure of Jarrett. After developments earlier tonight we must assume that whoever wins this match will go on to face Raven at this month’s Pay Per View, Destiny. This week’s main event is much better received that last months, and the crowd still have some interest after what some may consider and lacklustre show. Styles takes the advantage in the match after Credible gets flipped over the ropes onto the apron. Styles springboards off the ropes and dropkicks Credible off the apron. Styles bounces off the ropes and flies over the top with a flipping plancha. Back inside the ring Styles nails Credible with a flying hurricanrana. He whips Credible into the corner then runs in with a couple of flying knees. Big running powerslam by Styles. He climbs up to the top rope. Spiral Tap! Styles gees up the crowd signals for the Styles Clash. Don Callis runs down the ramp and jumps onto the apron with a Cane. Styles knocks him off the apron. The cane drops to Credible, whos back to his feet. Styles turns round. Crack! Credible just smashed Styles in the head with the cane. The ref calls for the bell. Styles takes this one by DQ. Callis and Credible continue to beat down Styles, until inevitably Erik Watts runs down the ramp. Callis and Credible play the cowardly heels and jump out of the ring. This rivalry isn’t over yet.

AJ Styles bt Justin Credible via DQ (76/76/77) **1/2

-End Show-

CQ – 71%

TV – 4.83

4-2-04

Attendance - 2509

1. HUSS!!

This match was originally billed as a return match for Elix Skipper after a long period of touring in Japan, however it was hijacked by the TNA crowd’s first real view of ‘Barbaric Beserker’ Jimmy Jacobs. Although he has appeared in TNA before, this was the debut of the HUSSman. Jacobs came out to a Transformers version of ‘Jump’. He HUSSes down the aisle, tapping his wrist as he goes. The fans don’t seem to get the gimmick. He jumps onto the apron and tries stepping over the top rope, but there’s no chance of it. Jacobs’ is 5’8. He eventually gets his leg on the top, but falls into the ring, which draws a few chuckles from the crowd. The match itself wasn’t too bad either. Jacobs went for a few comedy power moves, such as a Gorilla Press, but he has no chance of getting Skipper into the air. Jacobs tries a bearhug later on in the match, but Skipper just looks down on him whilst he proceeds to squeeze, and gives Jacobs a big axe handle to the back. He’s not all comedy though. Jacobs exhibited a fine offence of moves, including a picture perfect flying headscissors. Skipper went for a German suplex, but Jacobs flipped through it. He grabs Skipper’s neck, ran up to the corner and flipped over, slamming him to the mat. I believe he calls that the Contra Code. Jacobs holds on and gets the win. What a shock victory. As Jacobs goes to the back, a handful of the crowd starting ‘HUSSing’ him. Maybe they’re getting into the gimmick

Jimmy Jacobs bt Elix Skipper (66/50/83) **1/4

Elix Skipper lost overness. Jimmy Jacobs gained overness.

2. At The Gateways Of Hell

Don Callis is making his way out to the ring, as usual. I don’t think there has been a week without a Callis promo, but he’s good on the mic, so I’ll let it slide. You know the drill by now.

CALLIS – “Last Saturday night TNA showed that it could hang with the big boys. Everyone in the back gave it 110% and we showed the world that TNA is not just another indy, we are ready to compete. So I want all you fans here in the Asylum to give it up for everyone in the back, who for months have been busting their asses every single week to show you some real Total Nonstop Action.”

The crowd applauds. Some of them even stand up and show their appreciation.

CALLIS – “Right, that’s enough of that you inbred hicks. (Crowd boos). Yeah, that’s right, I don’t go for the cheap pops like Watts, it’s either my way or the highway, eh West? So on with business, because we’ve got a action packed night tonight. Erik Watts, you pushed me. You’ve pushed me to the edge, and I’m about to snap. You come out here and act like this is your show and that you’re the top dog. This is my show, I call the shots. You cost Jeff Jarrett the World title. You stuck your nose in my business and booked the match, and believe me, you’re going to pay for it. Starting tonight, I’m going to drive you out of TNA. By the end you will wish you’d never set foot in this company. So tonight, in the main event, you will take on Justin Credible. However, it won’t be a normal match, it’ll be a Singapore Cane match, meaning Canes are legal. Have fun, Erik.”

Callis drops the mic and makes his way to the back.

75%

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

3. Dissention In The Ranks

This match sees the TV debut of the Briscoes. They were pretty impressive on the pre-PPV show last Saturday, but they are up against two of TNAs top up and comers, CM Punk and Julio Dinero. As you would expect this is a great tag match, minus the lack of crowd involvement. The Briscoes have been teaming for years on the independent circuit and are hopefully going to be huge in TNA. If only they had a great heel manager with them. Jay and Mark double team Punk, who seems reluctant to tag in Julio, who is a spectator for much of the match. Eventually, Dinero forces the tag by slapping Punk on the back as he hits the ropes. Punk hits Jay with a huge Double Underhook Backbreaker and goes for the cover, but the ref informs him that he’s no longer the legal man. Julio jumps on top for the cover, but Jay kicks out. Punk starts yelling at Julio for costing them the match. Whilst they are busy arguing, Jay makes the tag to Mark. He comes in and gives Punk a Yakuza kick to the back of the head, sending him crashing into Dinero. Punk falls out the ring and Dinero stagger back, straight into the Cutthroat suplex by Mark. He makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3. After the match, Punk and Dinero continue arguing on the outside of the ring. They blame each other for losing the match. Back inside the ring, the Briscoes seem to be waiting for something.

The Briscoes bt CM Punk & Julio Dinero (69/48/90) ***

4. A True Legend Graces TNA

Out through the curtain comes…JIM CORNETTE. He gets a mixed response from the crowd, as alarmingly it takes them a while to work out who he is. I don’t think some of them even know. He is in his classic white jacket, complete with red shirt and white tie, and has his tennis racquet in hand. The Briscoes hold the ropes open for Cornette who steps through. He’s given the mic.

CORNETTE – “NWA:TNA, you are looking at the future of your company. These two men who stand beside me are perhaps the most talented tag team in the game. They have taken everything that has been thrown at them and literally outclassed them in the ring. These two are stars in the making, and with my guidance they will get to the top. Everyone in their path they will beat, until they get their shots at the NWA Tag Team titles. That’s right America’s Most Wanted, the Briscoes are gunning for you, and with Jim Cornette by their side they will not fail. Nashville hicks, you are looking at your next NWA Tag Team champions, the Briscoes!”

Cornette and his team leave the ring. Jim being Jim, he doesn’t give up, trash talking AMW into the camera as they walk back up the ramp. Unfortunately Cornette debuted in front of 2500 hicks tonight, with atleast half of them not having a fucking clue who he is. Shame on them. To quote a Kevin Smith film, “fuck them in their stupid fucking asses”.

55%

Mark Briscoe gained overness. Jim Cornette lost overness.

5. Still No Respect

The next match comes in the aftermath of Bound for Glory. Before the match a video is shown of the finish to the 6-man from BfG. It shows Gilbertti using one of his veteran tricks to beat John Walters. Chase Stevens challenged Gilbertti for a match tonight to avenge the defeat from last Saturday. He comes down to the ring accompanied by only Vince Russo. Gilbertti comes out and the match begins. Stevens looks pretty promising in the ring. He doesn’t have a bad look either. Gilbertti isn’t looking too great in the ring however. Maybe he should thing about winding down his career and going backstage. Gilbertti looks to be on top in the match. He takes advantage of Stevens’ cocky approach, reversing a sleeper into a jawbreaker. Gilbertti clocks Stevens with a big right then sends him flying into the turnbuckle. He goes a little old skool, smashing Steven’s head into the turnbuckle as the crowd count along. Stevens’ staggers out the corner and flops headfirst to the mat, Nature Boy style. Gilbertti calls for the finish, but Russo jumps up on the apron. He takes a big right hand from Gilbertti. This bring Walters down to the ring. He jumps onto the apron on the outside of the ring. Gilbertti runs over, but Walters jumps down. Gilbertti shouts at Walters. Stevens’ comes from behind and schoolboys him. Gilbertti can’t get the shoulder up. 1…2…3! Stevens gets the win thanks to interference from Walters.

Chase Stevens bt Glen Gilbertti (62/56/68) *

Chase Stevens gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

6. Controversy

Yes fans, after a week off B to the Jizzy returns to TNA in his usual slot. I know fans were bitterly disappointed after Mr James did not appear on the card last week, however we thought he deserved a week off (*cough*Iforgottobookit*cough*). The set hasn’t changed since you were last here: barcaloungers, cooler, beer, fancy carpet. Here we go again…

JAMES – “Well hello there, long time no see. Yes boys and girls, it’s the return of B to the Jizzle, inter to the vizzle, only on NWA televizzle. And this week our guest is a man who put on a great showing at Bound For Glory and definitely got 2 thumbs up for the Jizzster, the NEW X-Division champion, Chris Sabin!”

Chris Sabin comes through the curtain, wearing his title belt around his waist. He is greeted by a ‘Hail Sabin’ chant from the crowd as he makes his way down the aisle. He climbs into the ring and joins BG in the seating area.

JAMES – “Well Chris, it’s nice to have you on the show, and congratulations on winning the X-Division title last Saturday night.”

SABIN – “Thanks BG. I’ve been hoping that I’d get the call, heh.”

JAMES – “Anyway, I was watching the match backstage in the 4LK executive lounge and I have to say that the match showed the world that there is nothing that can compare to the X-Division. I mean you guys were something else.”

SABIN – “Yeah, I’ve heard a lot of good things about the match. I haven’t had chance to go back and watch it yet, but I’ve had people telling me how good it was. I’m just thankful that TNA keep giving me these opportunities. I’ve gotta take my hat off to my opponents though. Red, Paul and Michael all gave me a hellova fight and I’m just glad to have made it out of the match with the belt.”

The interview is about to continue when Michael Shane’s TNA version of Perfect Strangers plays and the New Franchise comes out to the ring, without Shane Douglas for once. He looks all business and steps inside the ring, snatching the mic from Sabin.

SHANE – “You see there’s something wrong with what you said right there. You made it out of there with that belt. See there’s something wrong with that. Hmm, lets rephrase that. You made it out of there with MY belt. Yeah that’s right Sabin, that’s my belt. Roll the footage.”

All three men turn towards the TNATron and it shows footage of last Saturday’s fatal fourway X-Division bout. It shows a double feed with Shane holding Red in the STF on one side, and Sabin pinning London on the other. It clearly shows Red tapping out before the three count.

SHANE – “Look Sabin. Look. You can clearly see that Red tapped before you got the three count. I won the match. That belt should be mine. I should be the X-Division champion!”

Shane goes to snatch the belt from around the waist of Sabin, but he pushes Shane away. The two men square up and look like they are about to go at it when Don Callis comes onto the stage.

CALLIS – “Hold it, hold it, hold it. I’m not wasting something this good on free TV, that just wouldn’t be good business. I tell you what, next week we’ll have a number one contendership match. It will be Michael Shane versus Paul London. The winner will get a shot at the X-Division title at the Pay Per View.”

Callis leaves us once again. Shane seems to have calmed down and is somewhat appeased by the announcement, and he peaceful leaves the ringside area, as does Sabin.

66%

Chris Sabin gained overness. Michael Shane gained overness.

7. I’m Sorry

I’m not even going to bother with this one really, but I am going to explain myself. This match is the culmination (culmination [/American Pie]) of an almost 3 month feud between Danny Doring and Sonny Siaki, and I feel the need to apologise for it. This midcard feud could’ve been so better used. I could’ve pushed someone like CM Punk or Kid Kash etc up the card, or even brought in a new guy, but no, I had to book Danny Doring versus Sonny Siaki. You see, I must make a confession. I am a Danny Doring mark. I have secretly marked for Danny Doring since the ECW days, and now that I have won my little diary award and you people don’t seem to care about who I push, I can admit it. And I’m sorry. I should’ve just let him die in midcard hell with Roadkill. Oh well, one positive thing that did come from this feud is that I noticed Sonny Siaki is actually pretty good. Who knows, maybe he’ll be my next ‘Danny Doring project’. Anyway, on to the actual match. Doring and Siaki worked very well together once again. Siaki looked very good in the match. He eventually finished off the match with the Siakolypse Now piledriver. Oh well, better luck next time.

Sonny Siaki bt Danny Doring (82/77/88) ***1/2

Danny Doring lost overness. Sonny Siaki gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

8. A Mystery Challenge

Backstage we have Terri, sorry I mean Lollipop, standing by with Jerry Lynn for another thrilling interview segment. So Terri and Jerry, sorry I mean Lollipop, you know what, from now on she’s Terri, I mean she may as well be. So, Terri and Jerry are standing in your basic backstage set.

TERRI – “Thanks Mike. I’m standing by with Jerry Lynn, who apparently has a big announcement for Simon Diamond.”

LYNN – “That’s right. You see I know Simon’s been doing some trash talking in the back about me winning the submission match being a fluke, so I thought I’d give him another opportunity. So next week, it’ll be me and a surprise partner against Simon and Swinger. I’ll see you next week boys.”

TERRI – “Well there you have it fans, Jerry Lynn has challenged Simon and Swinger to face him and a mystery partner on next week’s edition of Total Nonstop Action. Back to you, Mike.”

Well that was short and sweet.

66%

9. Why Didn’t I Make This The Main Event??!!

This match was fantastic. Virtually flawless, which is what you would expect from a Christopher Daniels-Low Ki encounter. Unfortunately this match was too good, and really showed that I have a serious way to go with my booking. I pulled a Bischoff here. It’s like Goldberg-Hogan on Nitro all over again. Anyway, this match had it all. The crowd was seriously into it, the spots were flawless, everything looked crisp and there were many near falls. This match should’ve been saved for the Pay Per View, but I’m sure this won’t be the last time these two face off based upon this match. Low Ki got a nearfall after a Koppu kick, then he whipped Daniels across the ring and gave him a cartwheeling enziguri. Daniels went for a Brainbuster, but Ki reversed into the Dragon clutch. Daniels didn’t allow him to lock it in and spun round, getting a 2 count with a Northern Lights suplex. Low Ki went for his Phoenix Splash, but Daniels rolled out of the way. As Ki got back to his feet, Daniels gave him a picture perfect flipping calf kick. Daniels then hit the double jump moonsault, but Ki somehow got the shoulder up before the 3 count. The two went back and forth a bit longer, then both men went for the kill. Daniels reversed a Hurricanrana into a piledriver, but Ki kicked out. Ki managed to slip out of the Last Rites and nail a Dragon suplex, but Daniels kicked out. Ki started kicking the hell out of Daniels’ head and neck, trying to weaken him for the Dragon Clutch, or generally kill him, I’m not sure, that’s how stiff they looked. Daniels looked like he was about to be finished, but he slipped out of the Ki Krusher and hit the desperation Angel Wings. Both men struggled to make it to their feet. Daniels and Ki started slugging it out, then Low Ki gave Daniels a big kick to the knee. Daniels went down clutching his knee, rolling in agony. The referee looked quite concerned and went over to him in the corner. Low Ki stood there watching Daniels, but didn’t see what was coming up behind him. Abyss had come running down to the ring and slide in silently. He spun Low Ki round and gave him a hellacious Black Hole Slam, almost sending Ki through the mat. Daniels miraculously recovered and crawled over to get the 3 count. After the match, he joined Abyss on the outside, then lead him up the ramp. What’s up with that?

Christopher Daniels bt Low Ki (94/89/100) *****

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

10. The Battle Is Over, The War Is Won

We join Raven for one of his fabled promos. Now this is real entertainment. A 5* match followed by a Raven promo. It doesn’t get any better. He’s sitting in a darkened corner, alone. On an unrelated note, he seems to be growing his hair back, which can only be a good thing. Old skool Raven ruled the roost.

RAVEN – “I told you Mitchell. I told you that when all was done I would stand glorious, and that’s exactly what I did. You gave it all you could, Gacy, but it just wasn’t enough. I’m a fighter. I’ve been through all the shit you could imagine, and I’ve come out alive. I’ve seen many fall on the dingy road away from doom. Some of them close, some closer, but I survived. I’m not like anything you’ve ever seen before. I live off of hate. I’ve seen the worst and I have nothing to fear. My hatred for you drove me to victory. You thought I was weak Mitchell, but I proved you wrong, again. I showed the whole world that the Raven does not quit. When the chips are down, I do not crack. I am no longer the weak shell of myself. I am strong. I am stronger than you. I am a force to be reckoned with, and I will accomplish all I am destined to. The battle is over, the war is won, and thus, I’m here, at a fork in the road. One side is labelled destiny, the other is failure. Which way will I go? Well I guess only time will tell. However, I will not rest until my destiny is fulfilled. Quote the Raven, nevermore.”

Pose. End.

91%

Raven gained overness.

11. Duelling Canes

And so we move on to the main event, which sees Justin Credible make his return to TNA. He’s had some work with All Japan Pro Wrestling in the land of the rising son and between that has unfortunately been a victim of the ‘no plans’ condition. Hardly his fault though. Erik Watts comes out to a mediocre pop. He doesn’t belong in the main event. See, the problem with this match is that the crowd was still pumped from the Daniels-Ki match, and pretty much anything that followed it was going to be a disappointment. Infact, the show as a whole has been pretty good, so the crowd is pretty much burnt out. Watts and Credible weren’t too bad. It took about 5 minutes before the first cane was introduced, when Credible swung at Watts, but he ducked and gave Credible a DDT. Later in the match, Watts whipped Credible hard across the ring, sending him flipping over the ropes. Credible went for a clothesline whilst on the apron, but Watts ducked and nearly took Credible’s head off with a cane shot. Credible came back after a low blow and then he proceeded to crack Watts in the skull with the Cane, but Watts no sold it Hogan-style and planted Credible with a powerbomb. This brought out Don Callis and the Red Shirts to the ring. Callis ran round the outside and jumped on the apron, distracting the referee, as the Red Shirts entered the ring. They whipped Watts against the ropes and nailed their Double Spinebuster. This allowed Credible to get back up, pull Watts to his feet and nail the That’s Incredible tombstone on the Cane. He covers and gets the 1-2-3. After the match, all 4 men put the boots to Watts. Officials try and stop the assault, but they are taken out, including a vicious Cane shot to Rudy Charles. The Shirts hold Watts up in the ring as Callis takes the Cane and winds up. Here goes…no, AJ Styles just ran through the crowd and jumped into the ring! He knocks down Callis and takes the cane. Cane shot to Gage. Cane shot to Northcutt. Cane shot to Credible. AJ Styles has made the save. I didn’t even know he was going here tonight.

Justin Credible bt Erik Watts (60/53/68) *

The match suffered because the crowd were still pumped from the last one.

-End Show-

CQ – 70%

TV – 4.83

31-1-04

Attendance – 8147

The show opens up with a video package played to ‘Bound’ by Disturbed.

Ready

-Clip of Styles pinning Jarrett to win the NWA World title on 11/06/03-

Darkness cover me

-Clip of Jarrett defeating Styles to regain the belt on 22/10/03-

I'm not ready to die, girl

Because of what you don't tell me

I'm not ready to walk inside of where you're taking me

I'm not ready to die, girl

-Clip of Styles making Jarrett tap out in the Texas Cloverleaf on 26/11/03-

Because of what you don't tell me

I'm not willing to compromise the man i want to be

-Clip of Styles pinning Jarrett on 3/12/03-

Think you're a little bit closer

To changing me

-Clip of Callis announcing Styles versus Abyss in a steel cage match on 10/12/03-

You're never winning me over

You're wasting time

-Clip of Styles defeating Abyss in the cage match, but then being attacked by Jarrett and his cronies on 17/12/03-

Leave me be

I'm not ready to die, girl

Because of what you don't tell me

I'm never going to vow the line of your conformity

-Clip of Styles demanding his title shot from Jarrett on 24/12/03-

I'm not ready to die, girl

Because of what you don't tell me

I'm not ready to leave the realm of anonymity

-Clip of Jarrett retaining his title against Styles via a guitar shot on 12/1/04-

Think you're a little bit closer

To changing me

You're never winning me over

You're wasting time

-Clip of Erik Watts announcing Jarrett versus Styles for Bound for Glory on 21/01/04-

Get away from me

Think you're a little bit closer

To changing me

-The video ends with the final clip of Styles holding the NWA World title belt in the air after fending off Jarrett, Gage and Northcutt on 28/01/04-

You're never winning me over

You're wasting time

76%

TENAY – “Welcome to NWA:TNA’s very first supercard pay per view, Bound for Glory! I’m Mike Tenay, joined by Don Callis.”

CALLIS – “Welcome to my show, Mike. It’s great to be here promoting my very first pay per view extravaganza. Yes fans, I am proud to welcome you to Don Callis presents Bound for Glory! Now lets not waste anytime tonight, Tenay. I’ve heard you on FOX and you waste time with your pointless chatter – doesn’t do anything for ratings. You understand, right?”

TENAY – “Listen Don, I’ve been doing this job since before you were leading a bunch of Action Men, so why don’t you just let me do my job, ok?”

CALLIS – “Whoa whoa whoa, what’s with the attitude Mike, I’m just trying to keep you on your toes, ok, right, good. Anyway, on with the show.”

TENAY – “Ok Don. Anyway, our first match will be a battle of future versus present, as Glen Gilbertti teams with independent stars Divine Storm to take on John Walters and his Russo Inc buddies, the Naturals, Andy Douglas and Chase Stevens.”

CALLIS – “That’s right Mike, this one has been brewing for weeks now, and it’s all about respect, as Walters looks to give Gilbertti’s career one final flush down the toilet.”

TENAY – “And we can’t forget about Vince Russo, who will no doubt be present at ringside for the match, and he definitely has the potential to swing the match in the direction of his boys.”

With that Vince Russo and his crew make their way to the ring. I say Russo, but in fact John Walters leads them all down to ringside. They are soon followed by the team of Gilbertti and Divine Storm, who get a nice face pop from the crowd.

Glen Gilbertti and Divine Storm vs Russo Inc (Walters, Douglas & Stevens)

The match kicks off with Walters and Storm in the ring. Storm trots close to the ropes, and Russo grabs his ankle, distracting him, allowing Walters to attack from behind. Forearms to the back of Storm. He whips him across the ring. Clothesline attempt ducked. Storm comes back and levels him with a flying forearm. He drags Walters to the corner and tags in Chris Divine. The two give Walters a double wishbone, then Divine delivers an elbow drop. He pulls Walters up and goes for an atomic drop, but Walters flips over the back. Backdrop by Walters. Divine landed right on his head! Walters grapevines the leg and stretches to make the tag to Stevens. The Natural comes in and gives Divine a knee drop. He whips Divine into the corner, and charges in, but Divine gets the boot up. Swinging neckbreaker by Divine. He’s quickly back to his feet and jumps onto the second rope. Flying legdrop on Stevens! Divine makes the cover but only gets a 2. He lifts Stevens arm, exposing the chest and makes the tag to Gilbertti. Jab to the midriff by Gilbertti. He starts jabbing away at Stevens. Inverted atomic drop. Gilbertti sits atop Stevens pummelling away at his forehead, until Walters jumps into the ring and breaks it up. Gilbertti goes after Walters, but he quickly slides under the ropes. Whilst Gilbertti taunts Walters, Steven comes up from behind and gives him a reverse DDT. Stevens pulls Gilbertti into the corner and tags Douglas. The two stomp away at the midsection of Gilbertti, then Chase leaves the ring.

Russian leg sweep by Douglas. Douglas waits for Gilbertti to get up then gives him a hurricanrana. Douglas applies an armwringer then pulls Gilbertti to the corner. Tag to Walters. Walters climbs to the top rope and gives him an axehandle to the shoulder. Walters grabs his arm and whips him into the corner. Knifeedge chops. Gilbertti reverses and gives Walters a chop of his own, but a kick to the gut holts that. Walters give him an open hand slap then whips him to the other side of the ring. He charges in and gives Gilbertti a clothesline. Walters lifts Gilbertti onto the top rope. He climbs the ropes himself and hooks Gilbertti’s arms. Double underhook superplex! Gilbertti got launched across the ring! Walters gets back to his feet slowly then grabs Gilbertti. Backbreaker. Walters grabs the leg and slams it against the canvas, knee first. Gilbertti clutches the knee in pain, but it’s stopped when Walters pulls him up. He goes for a suplex, but Gilbertti ducks down the back. Walters turns round. Stunner! Gilbertti hit the desperation move! Both men are down, and slowly moving towards their corner. Walters makes the tag to Stevens as Gilbertti tags in Storm!

Clothesline to Stevens. Another clothesline. Quiet Storm whips him into the ropes. Back bodydrop. Douglas comes in, but is met by Divine. Divine Storm whips Douglas into the ropes. He comes back and flapjack him up. They stick out their knees as Douglas falls rib-first on them. Divine Storm are attacked from behind by Stevens and Walters. They whip them into the ropes then go for a double clothesline, but its ducked. The heels turn round and are met by a slingshot shoulderblock by Gilbertti, who got the blind tag. Gilbertti makes the cover, but only gets a 2 on Walters. Gilbertti whips Walters into the ropes, but Douglas stops him. Dropkick by Gilbertti sends both men tumbling out of the ring. The two get up on the outside, but are met by stereo somersault planchas from Divine Storm. Back inside is Stevens and Gilbertti. The two slug it out until Stevens give him a low blow. DDT by Stevens. Walters somehow makes his corner and gets a tag. Michinoku Driver by Walters only gets a 2 count. He whips Gilbertti into the corner hard, then gives him an enziguri. Walters goes for a Fisherman Buster, but Gilbertti ducks down the back. He pushes Walters into the ropes and rolls him up. Gilbertti has a handful of tights. Walters makes the cover. 1…2…3! Gilbertti gets the pin over Walters. He and his team celebrate on the outside, as Walters curses his luck.

Glen Gilbertti and Divine Storm bt Russo Inc (59/47/72) *1/4

TENAY – “Well it looks like Gilbertti finally taught Walters some respect.”

CALLIS – “Hardly, Mike. John Walters is one of the brightest stars this company has. He doesn’t have to be taught respect, he makes people respect him. Gilbertti should know that what’s best for business, and that’s that he should lay down for Walters and move aside. Gilbertti is a nobody, Walters is a star.”

TENAY – “Whatever happened to respecting the veterans?”

CALLIS – “That’s back in the past with glam rock and the mullet. This is the new millennium, and it’s all about being number one Anyway, lets get on with the show.”

TENAY – “Alright Don. Our next match is a tag title match, as America’s Most Wanted defend their belts against Mafia and Mack of Da Hit Squad. Over the past few weeks Mack and Mafia have stated that their goal in TNA is to tag win the tag gold, and have shown they will do it by any means necessary.”

With that ‘Cowboy’ James Storm and ‘Wildcat’ Chris Harris make their way out to ringside. They play the typical fan favourites, slapping hands with everyone around ringside before entering the ring. Then come their opponents, Da Hit Squad. They don’t even acknowledge the jeers of the crowd, they walk straight to the ring with their eyes very much on the prize.

NWA Tag Team Title Match

America’s Most Wanted vs Da Hit Squad

The four men square up in the ring. Mack and Mafia attempt to intimidate their opponents. AMW don’t even flinch. Then it begins, with both teams delivering big rights. DHS back their opponents into the corners. They deliver some more punches and chops, then look to whip AMW into each other. They try it, but Harris leapfrogs Storm. The two continue the momentum and clothesline both Mafia and Mack! Mafia gets rolled to the outside and the ref orders Storm out of the ring, so we’re left with Mack and Harris. Mack gets backed into the corner. Knifeedge chops by Harris. Mack gets whipped across the ring. Harris charges in with the clothesline, but Mack gets the boot up. Harris staggers back and Mack follows. He spins Harris round and gives him a terrible belly to belly suplex. Ouch, that was sloppy. Mack makes a cover, but Harris kicks out. Mack makes the tag to Mafia. Mafia comes in and delivers the elbow drop. Mafia bounces off the ropes with some momentum, and goes for a senton, but Harris rolls out the way. Tag to Storm. Cowboy gives Mafia a big knee to the stomach. He goes for an irish whip, but Mafia reverses ducking under Storm’s arm. German suplex! That looked evil! Storm got flipped right over! Mafia grabs the neck of Strom and wrenches back. He drives the knee into the back of Storm’s neck, then pulls him to his feet. He goes for an irish whip, but Storm reverses. Powerslam! Storm holds on for the cover, but Mack breaks it up. Storm gets a low blow from Mafia. He whips Storm into the ropes. Sidewalk slam!

Mafia makes the tag to Mack. Mack goes for a powerbomb, but it’s awful. He has to let Storm down and pick him back up again. Sloppy sitout powerbomb. 1, 2, kickout. Mack whips him into the ropes. Storm ducks a clothesline attempt. Mack spins around straight into a DDT. Mack gets straight up, not even thinking about selling the move and nails a scoop slam. Mack sits up on the top rope. He goes for a big splash, but Storm moves. Both men begins crawling towards their corners. They edge towards their parters, and both men make the tag. Harris comes in the traditional face house of fire. He knocks Mafia down with a right, then has one for Mack too. He whips Mafia into the ropes. He goes for a Thesz press, but Mafia catches him. He locks up the legs and arms, then drops Harris in some sort of Fisherman Buster. Mafia makes the cover, but there’s a kickout at 2. Mafia kicks Harris in the gut. Knee lift. That looked vicious! He whips Harris into the corner, and charges in with a body attack. Harris drops to the mat, and Mafia bounces of the ropes, crushing Harris in the corner. Mafia goes to the opposite corner, and runs towards Harris, then nails the flipping cannonball right into the corner! Ouch! Tag to Mack. Mack comes in and goes for the quick legdrop-cover combo, but Harris kicks out. Mack slams Harris to the mat and tells the crowd ‘that’s it!’ He climbs through the ropes and up the turnbuckles. Mack goes for a big senton splash, but Harris rolls out of the way. Mack gets up, but it’s straight into the Catatonic! Harris makes the cover. 1…2…3! Harris gets the desperation win for his team.

America’s Most Wanted bt Da Hit Squad (69/56/82) **1/2

TENAY – “Next up we’ve got the submission match, which will see Jerry Lynn take on Simon Diamond. This match will really show us what Diamond is made off. These past few weeks he’s been doing a lot of talking, but tonight we’ll truly see if he can back it up.”

CALLIS – “I assure you he can, Mike. I’ve known this man since the days of ECW and never has he looked out of his depth. Simon is a fantastic talent.”

Simon Diamond vs Jerry Lynn

After Simon and Swinger have made their entrance to the ringside area, and Simon has de-robed, we are ready to kick off this match. Remember fans, the match can only be won by submission; no pinfalls. The bell rings and the two foes lock up. The push eachother hard, and Lynn backs him into the corner. The ref calls for the break, and the two do clean, but Diamond gives Lynn a sly kick to the gut. Right hands to Lynn. He backs him into the ropes and whips him across the ring. Back elbow by Diamond. He makes it clear what area he’s going for this match, dropping a knee to the back of Lynn. He grabs the knee and neck of Lynn and applies a basic backbreaker, driving his own knee into the small of the back. The ref asks Jerry the question, but there’s no chance of him giving up at this early stage, and he reaches out to the ropes, forcing the break. Both men get back to their feet. Simon goes for a body slam, but Lynn falls down the back. Waistlock. Simon spins round and reverses. Jerry quickly hooks his legs with Simon’s, then rolls under into some sort of ankle lock. Simon is quick to crawl towards the ropes, making sure Lynn doesn’t do too much damage. Once again they lock up, but Simon breaks it with a kick to the gut. He gives Lynn a European uppercut then nails a backbreaker. He holds Lynn in the move, pushing down on his chest and legs, but once again Lynn won’t give up. Simon breaks the hold then stomps at the back of Lynn. He lifts Lynn to a vertical base then goes for his Simon Series. Snap suplex. A second snap suplex. He goes for the front face suplex, but Lynn drops down the back once again. German suplex by Lynn! Simon landed right on his head!

Lynn doesn’t waste anytime and legdrops the back of Simon’s neck. He grabs the arm and wrings it round. Simon starts to get back to his feet, but Lynn rolls him into a La Majistral. Pinfalls down count Jerry, no wait, he’s modified it into an armbar. Simon is stuck in the hold, and the leverage is hurting him. Eventually Simon is able to backroll out of the hold, and he gives Lynn a big boot to the stomach. Irish whip into the corner. Lynn goes in with such velocity that he actually bounces off the turnbuckle and hits the mat. Simon is quick to capitalise, locking Lynn in a Boston Crab. Simon wrenches back, applying lots of pressure to the lower back of Lynn. Lynn is stuck in the hold for a while, before a fights back. Lynn manages to roll round onto his back, then push Simon headfirst into the turnbuckle with his legs. Simon goes headfirst into the turnbuckle. He’s draped in the corner. Lynn makes his way back to his feet and sits on the top rope. He pulls Simon in and grabs his arm. Swinging Single Arm DDT! Simon hits the mat and immediately favours his left shoulder. Lynn goes straight back to work, focused as ever. He applies a hammerlock then lifts Simon up, hitting the hammerlock back suplex. Lynn goes straight for an armbreaker, but Diamond quickly skuttles to ropes. He is wary of these submission holds, especially after hurting his shoulder. Knee to the gut by Simon. He applies a headlock. Lynn back him against the ropes, sending him to the other side of the ring. Leapfrog by Lynn. Simon comes back and Lynn goes for a body scissors, but Diamond catches him. Wheelbarrow suplex! Lynn is down, favouring his back. Diamond taps his temple, then pulls Lynn up by his hair. He launches Lynn out over the top rope. Simon rolls under the bottom rope, joining him on the outside. Irish whip into the steel steps. Lynn hits the metal, back first. Simon pulls Lynn up and hold him in a bearhug, then rams him spinefirst into the ring post. Jerry goes down in a heap, holding his back once again. Jerry gets rolled back into the ring. Diamond calmly walks up the steps and onto the apron. Lynn groggily gets back to his feet and moves towards Diamond, who goes for a shoulderblock through the ropes, but Lynn counters, jumping up and legdropping Simon. Didn’t you know you can’t sunset flip Jerry Lynn?! Diamond rolls to the outside, where Swinger tends to him. They don’t see Lynn climbing up top. He flies off the top with a suicide dive, knocking both men to the concrete floor. Jerry gets up and gives the fans a devil horn sign before rolling Diamond back inside. He climbs to the top turnbuckle, but is slow about it and gets caught. Diamond crotches him and climbs up, joining him on the top. Superplex by Diamond! Lynn bounces off the mat! Lynn holds his back, which took the brunt of the impact.

Diamond pulls Lynn up by his hair. He kicks him in the gut then pulls Lynn between his legs. Diamond lifts Lynn up onto his shoulders into a Canadian backbreaker. Diamond pulls down on the stomach of Lynn, driving the air out of him and wearing down the back. Lynn struggles, but Diamond composes himself and plants him with a powerbomb. Diamond grabs the legs of Lynn and rolls him over into the Lion Tamer, complete with knee in the back. He pulls back, driving his knee right into the back of Lynn, but somehow Lynn squirms out again and pulls himself back through Simon’s legs. Simon tries to lock the hold back in, but Lynn blocks it. Diamond goes for another attack, lifting Lynn up for a powerbomb, but it’s reversed and Lynn falls down the back into a sunset flip, no, Lynn rolls that through into a modified STF (minus the leg hook). Simon is writhing in agony, but he can’t get to the ropes. Johnny Swinger jumps up onto the apron, distracting the referee. Lynn breaks the hold, runs up and sends him flying off the apron. Lynn turns around, but Diamond is up. He lifts him up into a Fireman’s Carry, but Lynn drops down the back. He spins Diamond around and goes for the Cradle Piledriver, but Diamond gives him a low blow. Diamond whips him into the corner, but Lynn leapfrogs over into a sunset flip. Lynn rolls it through again into the modified STF. Diamond is stuck in the centre of the ring. He’s screaming in agony. He starts yelling at Swinger to get help, but he just stands on the outside, not knowing what to do. Diamond tries to hold on, but he can’t, the pain is too much and he taps. Jerry Lynn has won the submission match. As Jerry Lynn celebrates with the fans, Swinger goes inside to help Diamond. He tries to help him up, but Diamond shrugs him off, and leaves the ring, alone.

Jerry Lynn bt Simon Diamond (81/74/88) ***1/2

TENAY – “Wow what a match that was."

CALLIS – “Yes, those two really showed what you should expect under the Don Callis regime.”

TENAY – “I hope so Don, because that’s the sort of thing TNA is all about. We pride ourselves on bringing you the top talent that the world has to offer, and the next match will be another showcase of this. It will be our X-Division 4 way match.”

CALLIS – “Yes Mike, it’s ‘one fall to take it all’. I decided that we would take the heated rivalry of London, Shane and Sabin and crank it up a notch by throwing in Red, creating a TREMENDOUS match. I have to say, I’m very proud of myself for creating this one. It’s going to be phenomenal. And I’m going to add some extra spice to this match. It’s going to be anything goes. That’s right, no count out, no disqualification, and best of all it’s going to be all 4 men legal at the same time. It’s that extra excitement that the X-Division is all about.”

And with that Chris Sabin makes his way out to the ring. He is followed by the Amazing Red, who is wearing a knee brace after injuring his knee when Shane threw him into the steel steps last Wednesday. Next out is Michael Shane who is in traditional Franchise garb, followed by his mentor Shane Douglas. The last man out is Paul London, carrying his belt over his shoulder. He’s the one with most on the line tonight, as he doesn’t need to be pinned in order to lose his title.

‘One Fall To Takes It All’ – X-Division Title Match

Paul London vs Chris Sabin vs Michael Shane vs Amazing Red

Ding, ding, ding, the match is underway. The four men circle around the ring, then pair off with some collar and elbows, Sabin and Red, London and Shane. Red and London get whipped into the ropes. They slide through their opponents legs. Both men go for kicks, but get caught. Stereo enziguris! London waistlocks Red. German suplex, no it’s blocked. Roll up by Red. 1, 2, no, Sabin breaks it up. Sabin whips Red into the corner, and follows in. Red slingshots over the top, but Sabin sees it and catches Red. Fire Thunder Driver! Sabin gets up into a clothesline from Shane. Shane makes the cover, but London breaks it up. London whips Shane into the ropes, no, reversal. London comes back. Flying headscissors takeover! Sabin and Red come back. They whip London into the ropes. Double flapjack on London. Red whips Sabin into the ropes, but Sabin reverses. Red jumps through the ropes and onto the apron. Sabin moves in but takes a shoulder to the gut. Red rolls over Sabin’s arched back and sprints across the ring. Body scissors to Sabin. Sabin lifts Red up, but Red nails a bulldog. He comes Shane and London. Shane holds Red up for a back suplex and London neckbreakers him. They give Red a wishbone leg spitter, then apply two spinning toe holds, stretching the knee of Red. He’s down in agony, and Sabin adds to it legdropping Red. Sabin decides to spoil the party by stomping Shane and London.

He pulls his rival Shane up. He goes for a suplex, but Shane drops down the back. He goes for a Dragon suplex, but Sabin blocks. London gives Sabin the dropsault and it sends him over. Shane holds on for the pin, but Red breaks up the count with a senton. London whips Red into the corner. He lifts him up in a front face lock and places him on the top rope. London climbs up to join him. He sets Red up for a superplex, but Sabin comes over and puts London up on his shoulders. Sabin and London lift Red up in the air. They are about to drop Red to the mat, when Shane springboards into the ring and crossbodys him. All four men hit the mat, hard! Shane holds onto Red for the cover! 1…2…no, Red gets the shoulder up. All four men slowly get back to their feet. Shane charges at Sabin, but he ducks and Shane goes over the top rope. He holds on, skinning the cat. No, Sabin sees it and dropkicks him off the ropes. Shane hits the outside hard. Douglas goes round to help him up. Sabin climbs to the top rope. Flying crossbody! All 3 men are down. They get back up to their feet. London jumps up onto the top rope. Shooting star plancha! All four men are down. Red sprints against the ropes. Flipping plancha takes out everybody! Red gets up and celebrates. He celebrates for too long though, and Shane Douglas chopblocks his injured knee from behind. Red is down clutching his knee. Shane, Sabin and London all get back inside the ring. Sabin gives Shane a roaring elbow. They whip Shane into the ropes. Kick to the gut. Double DDT on Shane. London makes the cover, but Sabin pulls him off. Sabin makes the cover, but London pulls him off. Both men engage in a shoving match. Double springboard dropkick! Red just took out both men. He sees Shane prone on the floor. Red Star Press! Cover, 1, 2, kickout! Shane just got the shoulder up. Red jumps up and goes onto the second rope. He jumps off and goes for his swinging Flatliner-esque move, but Sabin counter it into a swinging sideslam backbreaker. London grabs Sabin and nails a jawbreaker on the knee. He gives Sabin a Northern Lights suplex, then skips through the ropes. Slingshot springboard moonsault! 1, 2, Shane breaks up the count. Michinoku Driver by Shane! Red attacks Shane. He gets whipped against the ropes. Shane goes for a tilt-a-whirl, but Red reverses into a satellite headscissors DDT! Sick move! Sabin grabs Red. Tiger suplex! He holds on for the pin attempt, but London gives him a Shooting Star Press whilst in the bridge! 1, 2, Red breaks it up.

London whips Red into the ropes. Red goes for a headscissors. He spins round then grabs onto Sabin. Red continues twirling round and DDTs Sabin, taking both men down! Red flips up, but Michael Shane dropkicks his knee. He pulls Red in and give him a back suplex knee breaker. Shane holds on to the knee then gives Red a Dragon screw legwhip. Shane drops the knee on Red’s knee, but he’s attacked by Sabin. Shane goes for a hurricanrana, but Sabin blocks. He starts swinging Shane around in a Giant Swing. London runs up and dropkicks the spinning Shane! Sick! Snapmare by Sabin. He pulls London back to his feet. Fireman’s carry. He spins London round and drops him in a Diamond Cutter. Sabin makes the cover. 1…2…Douglas pulls the ref out of the ring! Suicide dive by Sabin takes out Douglas! Back inside the ring, London is going for a Shooting Star Press, but Shane runs over and dives against the ropes, crotching him. Shane tries to join London up top, but Red grabs him. Red goes for a spinning roundhouse enziguri, but Shane catches the leg. He gives Red another Dragon screw, then holds onto the leg, and locks in an STF. Red is locked in tight. He tries to fight out, but can’t get to the ropes. Sabin enters the ring. He ignores the submission and goes straight for London. He lifts London off the top in a suplex position. Future Shock! Sabin hit his patented Cradle Brainbuster. Red is still locked in the STF. He can’t get out, and doesn’t look like he can hold on much longer. Sabin crawls over and makes the cover. 1. Red is still in the hold. 2. Red starts tapping out. 3. The referee made the 3 count. The bell rings. Shane thinks he’s won the match. The referee has the belt, but walks past him. He raises the hand of Sabin and hands him the belt. Shane is shocked. He thinks he won the match. Douglas and Shane yell at the referee as Sabin walks back up the ramp, title over his shoulder.

Chris Sabin bt Paul London, Red and Michael Shane to become the NEW X-Division champion (69/57/82) **1/2

The X-Division title gained image.

The crowd is still buzzing after a hectic X-Division title match when Low Ki makes his way down to ringside. He is not scheduled to wrestle tonight so one must wonder what he’s doing here. He stomps down the ramp in his street gear, and is handed a microphone by our ring announcer. He enters the ring.

KI – “As many of you may know, last week on Total Nonstop Action I was attacked. I don’t know what happened. One minute I was walking along, the next I woke up on a doctor’s bed. I thought I would come out and give some advice to the coward who attacked me – Run. I will hunt you down and find you, and when I find you I will make you wish that you hadn’t done this (points to a welt on his head). I don’t like cowards. I am not a hard man to find. If you have a problem with me then we’ll settle it like men, inside the ring, but when I get attacked from behind I tend to get very pissed off. Now I don’t know who did this, but I have an idea, so Daniels why don’t you get your ass out here now and we’ll settle this NOW!”

After a brief wait, Christopher Daniels makes his way onto the ramp. He is in full Fallen Angel garb, and he methodically struts down the ramp. He joins Low Ki in the ring and takes the mic from him.

DANIELS – “I hope you’re not implying that I had anything to do with you being attacked. I don’t do things that way; I’m a man of honour. And anyway, I couldn’t have had anything to do with it, because I’d already left the arena by then. I guess you’re back to square one, huh Ki?”

KI – “You may think you’re clever Daniels, but I have my eye on you. I will find out who attacked me, and I will make them pay, and if I find out that you had anything to do with it…”

DANIELS – “Then what? You’d better watch that mouth of yours, Ki, it could make you some very powerful enemies.”

Daniels drops the mic and steps back, leaving the ring. Low Ki doesn’t take his eyes off Daniels for a second. The camera catches a sadistic smile on Daniels face as he steps through the curtain.

86%

Low Ki gained overness.

TENAY – “Wow, I thought they were going to go at it tonight. I guess Daniels doesn’t want anything to do with Low Ki.”

CALLIS – “Daniels is smart, Tenay. He knows that it’s not in his interest to get in a fight tonight. Low Ki is one badass muthahubard, and you don’t mess with him unless you’re prepared.”

TENAY – “Indeed Don. Ki mixes that the focused fighting spirit of Japanese puroresu with the high risk offence we see over here in the States. He’s possibly one of the toughest men in our sport, and certainly not one to mess with. Our next match is the Clockwork House of Fun match, which will see Raven take on the seemingly unstoppable Gacy, who will no doubt be accompanied by Father James Mitchell.”

CALLIS – “This is going to be a brutal match, and personally I see the advantage being with Mitchell’s monster. He’s a giant of a man, and there’s no way I can see Raven getting him off his feet, let alone for down for a three count.”

The ramblings of the two announcers are ended by the appearance of Gacy on the stage. The ring is all set up. If you’ve never seen a Clockwork House of Fun match it’s set up like this: poles are set up in the corner, with chains running from pole to pole. Hanging from the chains are various weapons. One fall takes the match. After Gacy and Mitchell are in the ring, Raven comes through the curtain.

Clockwork House of Fun Match

Raven vs Gacy

The ref calls for the bell and the two enemies square up. Gacy has a slight height advantage over Raven, and a definite weight advantage. Raven nails the right, but Gacy doesn’t even wobble. Raven tries a couple more, then backs against the ropes for momentum and nails the forearm, but Gacy just staggers back. Raven goes for a clothesline, but Gacy gives him a stiff clothesline of his own. Raven hits the match hard, clutching his ribs. Gacy pulls Raven up, and gives him a short arm clothesline. Gacy bounces against the ropes and goes for a legdrop, but Raven rolls out the way. Raven gets back to his feet quickly and waits for Gacy. Raven charges in and knees Gacy right in the face as he’s just getting back up. Raven crouches over Gacy, laying into him with rights. He really beats away at the face of Gacy, but Gacy just pushes him off. Raven gets up and goes for a bulldog, but Gacy chucks him across the ring. Mitchell yells for Gacy to grab a weapon, which he does, pulling a stop sign off the chains. He clocks Raven in the skull with it, sending a clunk around the arena and busting Raven open. Gacy drops the sign and pulls Raven back to his feet. Powerbomb onto the sign! Gacy doesn’t even flinch, doesn’t even smile, just looks blankly round the arena. Mitchell calls for Gacy to get a table. Gacy steps over the top rope and drops to the floor. He pulls out a table from under the ring. He slides it back into the ring and goes to climb back onto the apron. Baseball slide by Raven! Gacy falls off the apron to the floor. Raven waits for him to get to his feet, then bounces off the ropes. Twisting pescada…no Gacy catches him. Gacy runs Raven spine first into the ring post.

He pulls Raven back up and whips him hard into the guardrail, putting all his weight behind it. Gacy charges in looking to crush Raven against the rail. Drop told hold by Raven! Gacy hits the guardrail face first! Raven moves towards the timekeeper and grabs a chair. He turns round and nails Gacy with it. The big man staggers. Another vicious chairshot. Gacy is busted open, blood dripping down his face. Raven somehow drags the behemoth to the ring and rolls him inside. Raven steps in and pull down a chain from above. He wraps it around his knuckles the proceeds to lay into Gacy, trying to beat the life out of him. Raven whips Gacy into the corner. He charges in and clotheslines him, then holds onto Gacy and bulldogs him. Raven yells to the crowd and gives them his crucifix taunt, before setting up the table in the corner. He turns round and goes back to Gacy. Irish whip into the turnbuckle. Raven charges in for another clothesline, but Gacy jumps out the corner and knocks him down. Raven is down clutching his chest, as Gacy listens for orders from Mitchell. First he grabs a crutch from the chains above. He winds up and cracks it over the back of Raven. Raven flops around the ring, holding his back, as Gacy awaits more instructions. Mitchell points sadistically towards the propped up table, and Gacy nods. He pulls Raven between his legs, and lifts him up for a powerbomb. Gacy charges across the ring and literally throws Raven through the table!

Raven is down in a pile of table shards, and not showing any signs of life. A smile emerges on the face of Gacy. He pulls Raven to the centre of the ring and makes the cover. 1…2…kickout! Raven somehow kicked out! Gacy gets up, bounces off the ropes and gives Raven a big splash. 1…2…kickout! Raven kicked out again! Gacy looks fairly rattled, as does Mitchell. Mitchell points to the Singapore cane which hangs over the ring. Gacy reaches up and grabs it. He swings at Raven, but it’s ducked. Raven kicks him square in the nuts. Knee lift by Raven staggers the monster. Raven gives him some left jabs, then picks up the cane. Huge cane shot takes him down! Raven sets up the chair in the middle of the ring. He whips Gacy into the ropes. Drop toe hold on the chair! Gacy’s face bounced right off it. Mitchell is worried, and jumps onto the apron. Raven clocks him with the cane, sending him to the floor. Raven turns around straight into Gacy. He lifts Raven up into a fireman’s carry, but Raven drops down the back. Gacy turns around. Evenflow DDT! Raven makes the cover. 1…2…3!

Raven bt Gacy (70/66/75) **

And it comes down to the final match. The main event, and the match that everyone has been waiting for. The main event. Styles. Jarrett. Cage. NWA World title. Nuff said. Callis on commentary talks about how Styles has no chance of leaving with the belt tonight. Tenay responds that if anyone can beat Jarrett, it’s AJ Styles. There is a hushed awe around the arena as the champion comes through the curtain. He struts confidently down to the ring. He climbs through the door, leaving his belt on the outside. Next out is the challenger, AJ Styles. He walks down the aisle and inside the ring. It’s on.

NWA World Title Cage Match

Jeff Jarrett vs AJ Styles

The rules of this match are simple. The match can only be won by pinfall or submission. Other than that, anything goes. As soon as the bell rings, Jarrett attacks Styles. He beats some rights, then back him into the ropes. Irish whip. Styles ducks the clothesline attempt. He bounces off the ropes and hits a big flying forearm. Jarrett is up quickly, but Styles connects with some forearm smashes. Scoop slam and a chinlock is applied. This is going to be a war of attrition. Styles gets some extra leverage and tries to draw all the air out of him. Jarrett gets back to his feet then drops him with a back suplex. Jarrett immediately shows his strategy, stomping at the knee of Styles. Callis informs us that this is the strategy they devised, pointing out that a lot of Styles’ offence is speed based. You take away his mobility and he’s weakened significantly. Jarrett locks in a basic kneelock, wrenching back at the joint. Styles pulls back and reaches the ropes. Both men get back to their feet. Collar and elbow tie up. Jarrett backs Styles into the corner. He chops away at Styles. Styles reverses and puts Jarrett in the corner, giving Jarrett some open hand slaps to the chest. He whips Jarrett across the ring. Styles charges across and gives him knees to the chest. Styles pulls him out of the corner and delivers a snap suplex. Styles jumps onto the second rope then spring off into a flipping senton bomb. Styles makes the cover, but Jarrett gets the shoulder up. Styles pulls Jarrett to his feet. He goes for a suplex, but Jarrett drops down the back. Jarrett runs Styles face first into the corner. He grabs Styles knee and pulls in through the ropes. Jarrett pulls the leg towards him, then stomps at it. Styles clutches the knee and staggers out. Jarrett gives him a Russian Leg Sweep then pulls his knee towards the ropes.

Jarrett drapes Styles’ leg on the bottom rope, then drops all his weight on it. Jarrett bounces on the middle rope, then drops down on Styles’ knee again. Jarrett goes for it once more, but this time Styles gets his leg up, low blowing him. Styles gets back to his feet. Jarrett turns round into a lariat. Styles grabs Jarrett’s head and begins to lay into him with hate-fuelled rights and lefts. Standing moonsault to Jarrett. Cover, 1, 2, kickout. Jarrett’s back up. Styles tries to whip him into the ropes, but the champ reverses. Springboard moonsault, no, Styles holds on into a reverse DDT! Styles runs towards the ropes again and nails a quebreda moonsault. Styles holds on for the cover, 1, 2, kickout, Jarrett gets the shoulder up again. Styles goes to the top rope. He steadies himself, but Jarrett pushes the referee into the ropes, crotching Styles. Jarrett goes over to the corner and groggily climbs up joining him. Jarrett and Styles are both standing on the top rope. Superplex! Styles and Jarrett bounce off the mat! Both men are down. The crowd is getting behind Styles, trying to inspire him to victory. Jarrett crawls over and places an arm over Styles. 1…2…kickout. Jarrett pulls Styles up to his feet. He grabs Styles by head and throws him into the cage. Styles bounces off the mesh and to the mat. Jarrett lifts him up again and throws him into the other side of the cage. Jarrett pulls Styles head towards the mesh and grates it against the wall. Styles is busted open. Jarrett picks Styles up for a scoop slam and tries to drive him face first into the cage wall, but Styles drops down the back and pushes him into the ropes. German suplex by Styles! Styles rolls backwards and pulls Jarrett back to his feet. Belly to back facebuster! Styles rolls back and is on his feet. Jarrett catches a kick from Styles. Dragon screw leg whip. Jarrett lifts him up for a second, but Styles gives him an enziguri. Styles pulls Jarrett nearer the corner. He jumps up on the top rope. 450 Splash! Styles holds on for the pin. 1…2…no, Jarrett got his foot on the rope.

Styles goes for another big move, pulling Jarrett between his legs. He lifts Jarrett up in a Crucifix position, but Jarrett drops down the back. Low blow by Jarrett! Remember, it’s anything goes, no DQ. Jarrett kicks Styles in the gut. Piledriver! Jarrett makes the cover but only gets a 2. Jarrett slams Styles’ knee on the canvas. He gives Styles a kneedrop to the leg, then pulls him over. Jarrett lifts Styles’ leg and spins in the Figure Four Leg Lock. Jarrett rocks back and it’s locked in! Styles is trying to fight out of it, but he’s stuck. Styles’ shoulders drop against the mat. The ref counts. 1, 2, Styles gets the shoulder up. Styles tries punching Jarrett, but the champ lifts himself up, getting more leverage, forcing Styles back. Styles’ shoulders drop back to the mat and the ref counts again. 1, 2, Styles gets his shoulders up. Styles looks like he’s close to giving up, when he starts to rock the hold. The fans are getting behind him, and he responds, by rocking the Figure Four from side to side. Jarrett tries to stop it, but he can’t and Styles turns the hold over. Jarrett is writhing in agony! He tries to make it to the ropes, but they’re out of his grasp. Callis is going crazy on commentary! He is yelling for Jarrett to get to the ropes, and finally he does, breaking the hold. Both men get back to their feet slowly. Jarrett swings, but Styles ducks. Brainbuster suplex by Styles. Styles runs up to Jarrett and gives him a somersault senton. Styles tries to pick the champ up, but Jarrett rakes the eyes.

Jarrett gives Styles a big DDT. Irish whip into the ropes. Jarrett charges in and gives him a clothesline. Jarrett and Callis point to each other, then Jarrett taps his temple. Jarrett turns his attention back to Styles and walks over. Styles kips up into a hurricanrana! He holds on for the pin! 1…2…2¾! Jarrett just got the shoulder up. Callis is worried. He jumps up from the commentary position and grabs the belt from the timekeeper. He calls Jarrett and puts the belt inside the cage. Jarrett goes over and grabs the belt. He turns round and swings at Styles, but Styles ducks. Kick to the gut. Styles sets him up between his legs. Styles Clash! Styles hold on for the cover! 1…2…Jarrett gets the shoulder up! How did he kick out of that?! Styles goes back to Jarrett, but gets clocked with the belt! Jarrett makes the cover! 1…2…Styles gets a shoulder up! Jarrett can’t believe it, and neither can Callis. Jarrett lifts Styles up. He goes for the Stroke, but Styles elbows out of it. Jarrett is sent into the ropes. He comes back. Kick to the gut. Styles sets him up again. Styles Clash! Jarrett landed face first on the belt! Styles makes the cover! 1…2…3!!! AJ Styles has won the match! AJ Styles is the NEW NWA WORLD CHAMPION!

AJ Styles bt Jeff Jarrett (85/90/74) **1/2

AJ Styles gained overness. Jeff Jarrett gained overness. The NWA World title gained image.

The pay per view goes off the air as AJ Styles stands in the centre of the ring, holding his title high in the air. He did it.

-End Show-

CQ – 74%

PPV – 0.61

The show kicks off with some pyrotechnics, as NWA:TNA presents it’s first ever 3 hour Pay Per View event. It’s been about a year and a half since the creation of the promotion, and they are finally in a position to make inroads into the dominance of the World Wrestling Entertainment Empire. We kick off with a ‘free for all’ match, just to get the crowd warmed up before the actual spectacle begins. We hand over to Mike Tenay on commentary.

TENAY – “Hello fans and welcome to NWA:TNA’s first pay per view supercard! I’m Mike Tenay and tonight I am joined by TNA Management Consultant, Don Callis.”

CALLIS – “Yes that’s right Mike, I am here live and in color, you get that, in color. Now I know you regular fans would be expecting to hear the voice of Jeff G. Bailey, I have given him the night off, because all though he has been doing a TREMENDOUS job these past few weeks, I wanted to be here to witness the show firsthand, and you know how a bit of star power increases the buyrates, eh Tenay.”

TENAY – “Uh yes…”

CALLIS – “I can see it now, all the smarks will be getting on their computers, informing the rest of the world ‘oh my god, Callis is on commentary’ and the buys will sky rocket.”

TENAY – “Yeah sure Don. Anyway, remember fans there is still time to order the show, just contact your cable operator and tell them you want to purchase NWA:TNA’s Bound for Glory. In the mean time, Mr Callis has booked a pre-pay per view match for everyone’s entertainment, and it will be a 4-way elimination tag match involving Danny Doring, Roadkill, David Young, Sonny Siaki, Sonjay Dutt, Shark Boy and the debut of the Briscoes, Mark and Jay, who has already made his singles debut in TNA.”

CALLIS – “That’s right Mike, and I was greatly impressed with Jay. My scouts have been keeping their eyes on these two for a while now…”

TENAY – “Scouts?”

CALLIS – “Yeah, that’s right Tenay, I’ve got scout all over the “indy” (with finger quotes) scene. There is wrestling outside TNA you know Mike.”

TENAY – “Umm yeah, anyway I’m sure that the team who wins this match tonight will be in line for a NWA Tag Team title shot somewhere down the line, right Don?”

CALLIS – “Oh of course Mike, whoever wins this match will receive a title shot somewhere down the line, against the tag champions, whoever they may be.”

TENAY – “That’s right Don, because anything can happen in Total Nonstop Action. So lets get to the match, as it appears Danny Doring and Roadkill are on their way out.”

FREE FOR ALL – Danny Doring & Roadkill vs Sonjay Dutt & Shark Boy vs David Young & Sonny Siaki vs The Briscoes

After all eight men have made their way down to the referee Andrew Thomas sends the illegal wrestlers out the ring, leaving Jay Briscoe and Sonjay Dutt to start the match off. The two circle around the ring, then lock up in the centre. Jay backs Dutt against the ropes and whips him to the other side. Shoulder block by Jay. He skips over Sonjay and bounces against the ropes himself, as Dutt kips up in the centre of the ring and delivers a shoulder block of his own. Dutt gives the crowd a quick pose, but Jay ends it by tripping him and attempting the cover. Dutt kicks out at 1, then trips Jay with his palm to make a cover of his own, but like Briscoe only gets a 1. Both men get back to their feet and circle once again. Sonjay ducks under Jay with a hammerlock, wrenching his arm. Jay taps his shoulder then ducks under, reversing the hold. Dutt looks to try and get out of the hold, and does so by grabbing Jay’s neck with his free arm, jumping in the air and snapmaring him over. Jay holds his neck briefly, sitting on the canvas, then slowly backs into the corner, tagging in his brother Mark.

Mark comes in strong, going for a clothesline, but it’s ducked and Sonjay gives him a neckbreaker. Mark goes for another slugging right, but Dutt ducks again and applies a wastelock. Mark uses his strength and pulls arms apart, and rolls round into a wastelock of his own. He goes for a German suplex, but Sonjay blocks in midair and rolls Mark up with a modified victory roll. Dutt gets a 2 count, but Mark kicks out. The two begins to raise the pace of the match, exchanging shoulder blocks and armdrags, before Mark holds in the armbar. Dutt begins to battle back to his feet then gets to a vertical base. He flips and flops around, and even cartwheels, before reversing into another armdrag. Dutt decides he’s had enough time in the ring and tags in Danny Doring. Right hands to Mark. He backs him into the ropes. Irish whip. Mark reverses and plants the returning Doring with a dropkick. Legdrop by Briscoe. He makes the tag to Jay. They lift him up in a suplex position then drop him down face first. Jay makes the cover, but only gets a 2. He bounces off the ropes and gives Doring an elbow drop. He goes for a second, but Doring moves out the way. Doring gives Jay some rights, then slams him down. Doring makes the tag to Roadkill. Roadkill comes in and gives Jay a clothesline. He bounces off the ropes and delivers a big splash, but it only scores a 2 count. Roadkill lifts the much smaller Jay to his feet then gives him a scoop slam. Reverse chinlock is applied, as Roadkill tries to choke the life out of Jay. Briscoe edges his way to the ropes, forcing the break.

The two lock up, but Roadkill merely tosses Briscoe across the ring. Briscoe comes back with a dropkick to the knee, flooring the angry chicken plucker. He tags Siaki into the ring. They go for a double suplex on Roadkill, but they can’t get him up. Roadkill reverses and suplexes both to the crowd’s delight. He makes the tag to Doring, who climbs to the top rope and flies off with his Danaconda leg drop onto his nemesis Siaki. He makes the cover, but Young comes in and breaks up the count, but he turns round straight into a sidewalk slam from Roadkill. Roadkill then proceeds to climb to the top rope, going for his trademark splash, but Siaki crotches him on the top rope. Siaki looks pleased with himself, but he turns around straight into Bareback. Doring makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3. Sonny Siaki and David Young have been eliminated. After the losers finally leave, Doring and Shark Boy get back to it. Drop toe hold by Shark. He applies a headlock on the ground, but Doring manages to get back to his feet, and gives Shark a back suplex. He makes the cover, but Shark Boy kicks out. Doring pulls Shark Boy to his feet and goes for a bulldog, but Shark Boy slips out and pushes him straight into the turnbuckle. German suplex! Doring just got folded in half. Shark Boy drags Doring over to the corner and makes the tag to Dutt.

Slingshot legdrop to Doring. Sonjay pulls Doring to his feet and whips him into the empty corner. Flipping handspring elbow by Dutt. Doring staggers out the corner, but gets pulled back in by Dutt. He goes for a swinging DDT, but Doring blocks it after the 180. He lifts Doring up and rams him into his corner, tagging in Roadkill, who steps into the ring and begins work on Dutt. He gives Dutt some right and lefts, then goes for a big splash, but Dutt jumps up and reverses the charge into a hurricanrana. Roadkill gets to his feet, but is met by the boots of Dutt. Roadkill wobbles and is backed against the ropes. Sonjay runs up and goes for a spinning wheel kick, but Dutt gets caught. Roadkill walks him to the centre of the ring, and powerbombs Dutt down, bouncing him off the match. Cover, 1, 2, 3. Dutt and Shark Boy have been eliminated. We’re down to the Briscoes and Doring & Roadkill. Mark enters the ring, and immediately dropkicks Roadkill in the knee, which takes him down to one. Jay jumps in and dropkicks the other knee, taking Roadkill down to his knees. Both Briscoes bounce against the ropes then give Roadkill dropkicks to either side of his head. Sick! Mark goes for the cover, but Doring breaks it up. The ref tries to get him out of the ring, but Jay clocks him. A 4 man brawl erupts. Doring goes for the Bareback, but Jay ducks under and straight into a Tiger suplex. Mark goes for a crossbody, but Roadkill catches him. He lifts Mark up and holds up in a Gorilla press. He throws Mark onto Jay, sending both of them crashing to the mat. Doring and Roadkill signal to eachother, and Roadkill pulls Mark to his feet. They go for the Buggy Bag. Sonny Siaki runs down to the ring. As Doring runs against the ropes, Siaki pulls the top rope down, sending Doring to the floor! Back in the ring, Jay gives Roadkill a chopblock, and he drops Mark. Jay bounces against the ropes and gives him a Yakuza kick. Mark climbs to the top rope and nails the Moonsault. 1…2…3! The Briscoes win the match, thanks to interference from Sonny Siaki.

The Briscoes bt Danny Doring & Roadkill, Sonny Siaki & David Young, and Sonjay Dutt & Shark Boy (69/57/81) **1/4

--NWA WORLD TITLE CAGE MATCH--

--Jeff Jarrett © vs. AJ Styles--

--CLOCKWORK HOUSE OF FUN MATCH--

--Raven vs. Gacy--

--SUBMISSION MATCH--

--Simon Diamond vs. Jerry Lynn--

--'ONE FALL TO TAKE IT ALL' X-DIVISION TITLE MATCH--

--Paul London © vs. Amazing Red vs. Chris Sabin vs. Michael Shane--

--NWA TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH--

--America's Most Wanted © vs. Da Hit Squad--

--Russo Inc. vs. Glen Gilbertti & Divine Storm--

--Plus, a special Free For All bout--

28-1-04

Attendance - 2510

1. Callis Announces A Tremendous Main Event

The final Total Nonstop Action before the Pay Per View is opened up by the appearance of Don Callis. He stomps down the rampway, looking all business as usual, but somewhat more pissed of than in his other appearances. Callis tells the timekeeper to give him a mic or be fired, so he is promptly given what he desired.

CALLIS – “What the hell is wrong with people? This is my damn company, I call the shots. What is it with people thinking that they can just come out here and make matches? I, I am the mastermind behind this place. I make the matches, I deliver the ratings, and what do I get? I get some washed up chump stealing heat by booking a match that wasn’t even supposed to happen! Yes Watts, I’m talking about you. Styles wasted his chance. He put it all on the line and he LOST. But Watts has to come out here and play to the crowd, play the good guy, well Watts, this is the real world. The fans may want to see Jarrett versus Styles, but he had his chance and lost it. He threw it all away. If he was smart he would’ve thought of an insurance plan like we did. We knew Styles wouldn’t be able to resist and we beat him, by any means necessary. Unfortunately there’s nothing I can do about it now. I tried to get the match called off, but the NWA powers that be said it’s on. Nothing I can do about that. However Watts, you aren’t getting off the hook so easy. I’m going to make your life a living hell until I’ve driven you out of TNA. And it starts tonight. Seeing as you’re so chummy with Styles I’m going to book you in the main event together…taking on Jeff Jarrett and the Red Shirts. Welcome to Hell, Watts. Hope you enjoy your stay.”

Callis drops the mic and leaves. No fuss.

83%

2. Special K Massacre

Low Ki comes down the ramp, ready for his X-Division 4 way bout. His opponents stand in the ring, and frankly I don’t like their chances. The other three men in the match are Deranged, Azraiel and Izzy. He enters the ring, and the match instantly takes a 3 on 1 look to it. His opponents stand opposite him, as Low Ki stares a hole straight through them, focused as ever. The bell rings and he goes straight to work. The three men triple team him, pummelling away, but Low Ki rises up, throwing them off and sending them flying across the ring. They try and retaliate, but Ki fights them off with a barrage of palm strikes and stiff kicks. Whilst Low Ki is unloading on the luckless debutants, Christopher Daniels comes out onto the stage. He does nothing, just stands there, arm’s folded, nodding his head. Ki continues the assault inside the ring, tossing his opponents around like ragdolls. He whips all three of them into the corner and charges in with a vicious Koppu kick. Deranged staggers to the centre of the ring. Low Ki whips him hard into the opposite corner, then follows him in, cartwheeling in and striking him with an enziguri, which send Deranged to the outside. Izzy springboards in the direction of Ki, but Ki reacts fast and meets him with a huge roundhouse kick. Low Ki grabs the head of Izzy and locks in his Dragon Clutch, with brutal speed. Izzy is on the verge of tapping out, but Azraiel comes in and breaks up the submission. He starts laying in to Low Ki. He goes for a slam, but Ki blocks it with clubbing blows to the shoulder. Azraiel is forced to retreat, as Low Ki shakes the cobwebs off. He pulls Azraiel in, lifts him up and plants him with a Ki Krusher. Low Ki makes the cover for the 1-2-3. After the match, Daniels stands on the ramp, applauding Ki’s victory. As Ki walks up the ramp, Daniels offers his hand, but Ki brushes it aside, which does not look to have pleased the Fallen Angel.

Low Ki bt Azraiel, Izzy and Deranged (60/43/77) *1/2

3. Things That Go Bump In The Dark

Backstage, Kid Kash is walking to the locker room, carrying his bag over his shoulder. I don’t quite know why because he’s not booked on the card tonight, but I won’t nitpick. Kash is walking along when suddenly a door slams in the background. Kash turns around, but no one seems to be there. He continues walking on. He’s about to enter the locker room, but hears another loud noise caused by some mops and things falling over. Kash drops his bag and looks to see who might be following him. He looks down and couple of corridors, but sees no one. Kash shrugs and picks up his bag off the floor. As he finally enters the locker room, we see a shadow appear on one of the walls of the corridors. The shadow looks around briefly then runs off. Strange.

76%

Kid Kash gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

4. Simon Has A Surprise

D’Lo Brown is already in the ring awaiting the arrival of his opponent, Simon Diamond. Diamond comes out onto the ramp, looking confident with his trademark smugness. It’s an unusual look for someone who has a submission match against one of the top technical wrestlers in the world on Saturday. However, if anyone has a chance of beating Lynn, it’s Diamond. Behind all the hype and the mouth, he’s actually good in the ring, and could probably go toe to toe with anyone in TNA. Swinger accompanies Diamond out, but the two stop on the ramp. Diamond has the stick.

DIAMOND – “Look D’Lo, I’m sorry, but Simon has a few changes to announce. You see, Simon is a big player in TNA, and thus when I say jump, the boys backstage say how high. I asked them to reconsider my booking tonight, because I wouldn’t want to waste my talents on someone like you, especially when I’m headlining their first Pay Per View, Bound for Glory, this Saturday. However, they wouldn’t let me get out of the match completely, so I’ve had to find a replacement. Tonight, it’s not going to be Simon versus D’Lo Brown, it’s going to be Johnny Swinger versus D’Lo Brown.”

Swingers gleeful smile quickly changes to a look of horror. He turns to Simon, who gives him a reassuring pat on the shoulder and points to the ring. Reluctantly, Swinger makes his way down the ramp, as Simon follows. He gets on the apron and gives him Simon another look, but Simon points for him to enter the ring, with a smile from ear to ear.

78%

Simon Diamond gained overness.

5. Here’s Johnny!

Swinger eventually gets inside the ring and prepares himself to face former WWF star D’Lo Brown. Lets just hope Brown doesn’t try any running powerbombs [/rimshot]. Yeah that was low, but Brown’s been a bastard backstage, claiming he should be main eventing. D’Lo shows us pretty much what he did when he was at Vinnie Mac Wrasslin’. He gives us some trademark shakey head offence then that stupid legdrop. It looks like someone shoved a cattle prod up his ass. Swinger comes back, giving Brown a back suplex off the second rope after he caught D’Lo posing too long. Swinger gives Brown a big scoop slam then mocks him with a shakey leg drop of his own. Swinger taunts the crowd, then goes back to work. He goes for a kick to the gut, but Brown catches him, spins him round and flattens him with a clothesline. D’Lo whips him against the rope. Jumping leg lariat! D’Lo starts pumping up and the crowd starts getting behind him. He clocks Swinger with a right and left, then whips him into the ring. Swinger ducks under the attack, but comes back into the Sky High. 1…2…kickout. Swinger just gets the shoulder up. Diamond jumps onto the apron. The ref tries to deal with it, but D’Lo takes matters into his own hands, pushing the ref out of the way. Diamond clocks D’Lo in the head with what looks to be a chain wrapped fist. D’Lo staggers back into a roll up. 1…2…3. Johnny Swinger gets the victory. After the match, in traditional heel style they continue the beatdown, stomping D’Lo into the mat. Yes you know what comes next. Jerry Lynn charges out to the ring, diving under the bottom rope and attacking his foes. He clears the ring and saves D’Lo. The faces embrace as Simon and Swinger are forced to retreat. Lynn mouths ‘see you Saturday’ to Diamond.

Johnny Swinger bt D’Lo Brown (62/56/68) *

D’Lo Brown lost overness. Johnny Swinger gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

6. Shane Gets Franchised

Another build up match going into TNAs first PPV, which sees Shane Douglas and Michael Shane (the Franchises) taking on Red and Chris Sabin. This is the first time we’ve seen Douglas in the ring for a fair while now, and too be honest, he wasn’t too bad. Sure he’s been wrestling the same match over and over for the past year or so, but the fans still know him, and he’s pretty good on the mic, maybe’s he’s worth keeping around. Red sells like a champ as usual, and as usual can’t throw a decent punch to save his life. He looks like he’s caressing Douglas and Shane. The heels try all their dirty heels tactics to isolate Sabin, including choking him with the tag rope, but they can’t get the three count. The crowd starts getting behind Sabin, who gets back in the match after giving Douglas a low blow. He makes the hot tag to Red, as Douglas tags out to Shane. Red ducks a swinging right then nails Shane with a spinning heel kick. Douglas tries to attack with a back suplex, but Red flips over the top and dropkicks him, sending him into Shane. Sabin and Red signal to each other then deliver stereo enziguris. Red goes for the cover, but somehow Shane gets the shoulder up. Red gets thrown out of the ring by Douglas, who steps through the ropes and starts pummelling him, throwing him knee first into the ringsteps. Sabin goes for a crossbody off the top, but Shane catches him and reverses into a powerslam. 1…2…kickout. Shane goes for a powerbomb, but Sabin reverses, flipping through. He gives Shane a kick then tries to hook him for the Future Shock, but Shane falls down the back. German suplex! Sabin landed right on his head. Shane moves into the corner and starts striking up the band. He’s stomping his foot on the canvas, when Paul London jogs down the aisle. He stands on the outside, shining his belt, which distracts Shane, which allows Sabin to crotch him. Sabin hooks Shane up, delivers the Future Shock and gets the win.

Chris Sabin and Red bt Michael Shane and ‘Franchise’ Shane Douglas (69/60/78) **

7. Mysterious Attack

Mike Tenay informs us that there is some commotion backstage, apparently involving Low Ki. The cameras go to the back and find a fallen Low Ki surrounded by TNA officials. He’s lying lifeless on the concrete. It looks as if he’s out cold. Various wrestlers are standing around trying to work out what’s wrong. Road agent Kent Meyers asks anyone if they saw anything, but the replies are all negative. EMTs come in and start tending to victim. The cameras go back to ringside as we are left to wonder who could’ve attacked Low Ki?

80%

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

8. Damn That Dastardly Danny Doring

We come back from the commercial break to this nothing match between Ron Killings and Sonny Siaki. The two old skool TNA stars battle it out whilst Tenay and Bailey discuss who could’ve attacked Low Ki backstage. They go over a list of possible suspects, narrowing the list one by one, when really they should be concentrating on the match in progress, because it’s actually very good. Siaki and Killings seem to click really well and are producing a very good match. I know they have tried to mould Siaki into TNAs bright future and failed everytime, but I seriously think this kid has a big future ahead of him. If the boys in the back can give him the right push then I could definitely see him on top some time in the future. Killings shouldn’t be discounted either. He’s a former NWA champion. All they need to do is give him the right push and he’ll blind the world. Danny Doring makes his way to ringside as the match progresses, watching his rival work Killings over. I’d just like to take this opportunity to apologise for all the shitty run in booking I’ve been doing. It’s only when you come to write the shows that you realise how ridiculously overused it is. I must be the second coming of Russo or something. Anyway, to the surprise of few, Siaki and Killings slug away in the corner, and the ref gets knocked down whilst trying to break them up. Siaki floors Killings with a low blow then taps his temple, implying how smart he is. Doring slides under the bottom rope, quiet as a mouse, spins Siaki round and nails the G-Spot Suite. Siaki is sent crashing to the mat, as Killings and the ref both recover. Killings crawls over, drapes his arm over Siaki and gets the 3 count. Doring cost Siaki the match.

Ron Killings bt Sonny Siaki (81/74/88) ***1/2

9. Welcome To Raven’s Clockwork House Of Fun…

Raven is sitting in the corner of a darkened room, legs crossed, hands clasped together. The camera zooms in on him as he looks up, eyes staring at us, every single one of us, thoughtfully. He begins..

RAVEN – “Saturday January 31st, NWA:TNA presents Bound for Glory. This is however only a half-truth. The strong, the clever and the downright conniving are bound for glory, whilst those who remain are bound for failure. It is the way of nature that there are winners and losers. Only the strongest survive, and the weak? The weak die. So it comes down to me and you, Gacy. One final battle. One final fight to end the war. I am sure that somewhere down the line we shall meet again, but this fight is about more than pride, it’s about morals and values. Mitchell, you represent everything I used to stand for. You represent the demons who used to taunt me, following me like an unwanted shadow. They were everywhere I turned, I could not escape them, until eventually I gave in. But I am stronger now. I have forgiven myself for my past, and am looking toward the future, and my destiny. But before I can put the past to rest, I need to finish this one final battle. And we’re going to finish things my way, in my world… Welcome to Raven’s Clockwork House of Fun.”

Raven makes his trademark crucifix pose and the camera fades out.

91%

Raven gained overness.

10. The Tremendous Handicap Match

The shows ends with a final build up match before Saturday’s big event. Jarrett and Styles will collide one more time inside a steel cage with the NWA World title on the line. It’s pretty much what would expect from a handicap main event – nothing too special, but nothing that makes you want to change the channel. Some nice exchanges, mainly involving Gage, Jarrett and Styles. There was instant heat whenever Jarrett and Styles got in the ring together. At one point Gage went for his boot scrapes on Styles, but he kipped up into a hurricanrana, slamming Gage’s head against the turnbuckle pad. Styles bounced off the ropes and nailed some boot scrapes off his own, then finished it off with a stiff dropkick to the face. Watts is isolated by the heel team, and is busted open during the match. The Red Shirts double team him in the ring and hit a very nice double team spinebuster on him, sending Watts bouncing off the mat. Jarrett jumped into the ring and knocked Styles flying off the apron, then sent the Security to keep him occupied on the outside. Jarrett pulls the bloodied Watts off the canvas and delivers the Stroke, then pins Watts for the win. With Styles down on the outside, the Red Shirts come back into the ring, bringing the World title belt with them. Gage and Northcutt hold Watts up and Jarrett grabs his belt. He taunts Jarrett with it, then lines up the shot, but Styles is back in the ring. He nails Northcutt and Gage from behind. He ducks Jarrett’s attempted title attack, then kicks him in the gut, and launches him over the top rope. Styles has cleared the ring. He looks down and sees the NWA World title on the ground. He lifts it up, stands up on the turnbuckle and holds it high in the air. Will this be the outcome come Bound for Glory?

Jeff Jarrett and the Red Shirt Security bt AJ Styles and Erik Watts (68/62/78) *3/4

-End Show-

CQ – 76%

TV – 4.81

21-1-04

Attendance - 2509

1. Random Tag Match #372

We kick the evening off with a tag match, featuring Live Kruers, Sonjay Dutt and Shark Boy against Kid Kash and the debuting Slyk Wagner Brown. I don’t really know much about Brown to be honest, but I suppose not that TNA have more airtime we’ll see a lot more new stars. Kash hasn’t been around for months. Hopefully they’ll actually think of something for him to do and we’ll see him a lot more regularly. A pretty good match, as you would expect from the four. No one seems out of water, but at the same time there’s nothing spectacular. Brown reverses a Dutt headscissor attempt into a nice headscissor facebuster. He celebrates briefly, but it’s cut short when Shark Boy gives him a Shark Bite, right on his ass. Brown jumps up and down holding his ass, until he’s spun round and Shark Boy gives him a standing Diamond Dust. He could really use a new finisher. Anyway, the Live Kruers are victorious, as if we didn’t see it coming.

Sonjay Dutt and Shark Boy bt Slyk Wagner Brown and Kid Kash (57/52/77) *3/4

2. This Is Just A Tribute…

Russo Inc make their way down to the ring, strutting arrogantly as if they are the best thing since sliced bread in a can. Tenay and Bailey discuss Walters’ match last week against Disco Gilbertti. Tenay calls Walters a cheat, but Bailey defends him, calling him a ‘player of the game’. Vince Russo sits, holding the ropes open for his stars. The Naturals stand towards the back of the ring, arms crossed, like bodyguards for the Russo Inc crown jewel, John Walters. Walters is on the stick.

WALTERS – “Last week, I pinned Glen Gilbertti, one, two, three in the centre of this ring. Now a few weeks earlier, Mr Gilbertti promised to teach me some respect, and I will give it to him, he took me to the edge, well, maybe not the edge, probably more the middle, in fact he didn’t take me anywhere near the edge, but anyway, one thing he did do was, yes I’ll admit it, he taught me some respect. So anyway, I’m out here tonight to salute the man who taught me a lesson in respecting ‘the vets’, so here it is, my tribute to Glen Gilbertti.”

On the big screen begins the video tribute. It starts with a picture of Gilbertti and the text ‘Glen Gilbertti – A True Inspiration’, then ‘Send in the Clowns’ by Frank Sinatra plays in the background as the video starts. It shows:

-Glen Gilbertti dancing as Disco Inferno during his WCW days.

-Disco Inferno being pinned by various WCW stars.

-Disco Inferno receiving various finishers from various WCW stars.

-Disco and Alex Wright dancing their way to ringside, then footage of them being beaten and pinned by various opponents.

-Disco losing his TV title to Perry Saturn.

-Disco losing the TV title for a second time to Booker T.

-Disco losing the Cruiserweight title to Evan Karagius.

-Glen Gilbertti receiving various finishers from various TNA stars.

-Glen Gilbertti being pinned by Jacqueline.

-Gilbertti acting as the horse in a ‘Very B-Jizzle Xmas’.

-Finally, Gilbertti receiving the Fisherman Buster from Walters then being pinned.

WALTERS – “Well there you have it, that’s my tribute to a real nobody. Someone who tried their hardest, but never made the cut, in fact he didn’t even get close to it. Him teach me respect? He doesn’t even know what respect is. He’s a loser, plain and simple; a never was, nobody, never will be…”

This brings out Glen Gilbertti down to the ring, who gets a nice sympathetic face pop from the crowd. He enters the ring and squares up to Walters.

DISCO – “Listen Walters, you’re really starting to get on my nerves now. You come out here every week and trash me, but you’ve never proved yourself to be a man. You call me a never was, a nobody, well chump, I’ve accomplished more in my career than you ever will. You’re a primadonna. You’re an arrogant, smug bastard who needs someone to take him down a peg or two, and I think I’m gunna have to be the one to do it..”

Gilbertti lays Walters out with a big right hand. The rest of Russo Inc come at him, but he fends them off with rights and lefts, nailing Stevens with the Last Dance. Disco raises his arm triumphantly, but his celebrations are ciut short after Walters comes from behind and gives him a low blow. Russo and his boys begins stomping away at Gilbertti. Walters sets him up for the Fisherman Buster…HERE COME DIVINE STORM!

Divine Storm slide into the ring and nails the Naturals and Walters, with Russo escaping under the bottom rope. Quickly they clear the ring of the dastardly heels and help Gilbertti to a vertical base. He grabs the mic.

DISCO – “Hey Walters, I’ve got an idea, lets have ourselves a little match. You bring you’ve guys and I’ll bring mine (points to Divine and Storm), 6 man tag, January 31st, Bound for Glory. And you will learn to respect me!”

69% 53%

John Walters gained overness. Chase Stevens gained overness. Andy Douglas gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

3. The Gathering Get Punk’d

After an interesting commercial break (Monkey Olympics live on FOX), we come back to find CM Punk and Julio Dinero in the ring. Out come their opponents, Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger. Diamond has got to be careful not to injure himself, otherwise he’ll be weakened for his submission bout against Jerry Lynn. Diamond manages to avoid much in ring action, tagging out quickly, allowing Swinger to do all the work. Whilst on the apron, Simon was visibly stretching, making sure his muscles were loose. Swinger, possibly the worst wrestler in the match was getting beat down by the more talented Punk and Dinero. Swinger takes a Devil’s Lock DDT from Punk, who then climbs to the top rope. Whilst Punk is leaving the ring, Dinero tags himself in. Punk doesn’t realise he is no longer the legal man, and sets himself on the top rope. Dinero bounces back off the ropes, crotching Punk on the top! Punk falls to the mat. Dinero turns around to check on his motionless partner. Meanwhile, Swinger crawls across the ring and makes the tag to Diamond. Diamond sprints across the ring and school boy’s Dinero, getting the 1-2-3. After the match, Julio tries to help Punk to his feet, but he just shoves him away. Julio is left standing tin the ring, as Punk leaves up the rampway, looking pissed off.

Simon and Swinger bt CM Punk and Julio Dinero (61/55/82) **1/2

4. An Amazing Encounter

I’m going to save you the play by play for this much, because there was simply too much to call in this one. We’re only two weeks into the TNA on FOX era and we already have ourselves a match of the year candidate. Be sure to pick this one up on the ‘Best of the X-Division – Volume 2’. As I said, I won’t go PBP, but I will give you the best spots. London looked like he taken Red’s head off after a vicious leg lariat, but Red kicked out at two. Red went for his Code Red, but London reversed it into a hellacious spinebuster, which sent Red bouncing off the mat. Eventually Red fought back, reversing a London backbreaker attempt into a headscissor takeover, then spinning off London’s knee into an enziguri. Red went to the top, going for Infrared, but London moved as he came off the top. Red somehow managed to turn in midair and roll through the move. Red charged at London, nailing the Code Red, getting a 2 and 9/10s count, but London somehow managed to get the shoulder up. Red went for the Asai moonsault to the outside, but London caught him then slammed him back first into the ringpost. He rolls Red back into the ring and nails the double jump moonsault for a near fall. Red gets whipped into the ropes, but he Tiger feint reverses and clocks London with a spinning roundhouse kick. The finish was a tad more clusterfucked than the actual match, which is suprising as a Red match is usually pretty fucked. Michael Shane came out to the ring with Shane Douglas and began beating both men with the X-Division title belt. This caused the ref to call for the disqualification and a no contest. As usual, the appearance of Shane meant Sabin wasn’t far behind. He ran down to the ring and clocked both Franchises with huge rights. From there it turned into a 5 man brawl.

Amazing Red went to a no contest with Paul London via DQ (72/62/100) ****1/4

5. Callis Seizes An Opportunity

The ruckus is ended by the appearance of Don Callis. He comes out onto the stage with a microphone.

CALLIS – “Woah woah woah. Now I look down into the ring and not only do I see a lot of hatred and rage, but also a TREMENDOUS amount of talent. So here’s what I’m going to do – I’m going to book a match, with the X-Division title on the line. It going to be Paul London versus Michael Shane, versus Chris Sabin, versus the Amazing Red, 4 way dance, one fall to take it all. See you on the 31st gentleman.”

Callis turns and leaves through the curtain. The 5 men in the ring make their way to the back as we go to commercial break.

86%

Don Callis gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

6. Bathroom Break Time

TNA officials felt they were putting on too many good matches, forcing fans to miss their favourite stars in action, so they decided to bring you A MIXED TAG MATCH. I’m not going to lie to you, I didn’t watch the match either. I made myself a snack and only saw the finish. It was worth it thought. Ham and cheese toasties rock! The match itself serves a purpose. I think fans were forgetting that these two are supposed to be feuding; hopefully this reminded them. I returned to find Doring and Siaki in the ring. Doring ducked a big roundhouse right, then managed to nail the Wham Bam Thank You Ma’am. Ugh.

Danny Doring and Trinity bt Sonny Siaki and Traci (54/60/63) 3/4*

7. AMW’s Most Wanted

Backstage we join our tag team champions, America’s Most Wanted who are with everyone’s favourite hussy, Lollipop. She’s just like Terri, but on TNA! Anyway, she begins the interview.

TERRI – “Chris, James, last week you were viciously attacked by Mack and Mafia of the Hit Squad. Now I understand that you have a few words to say to them.”

HARRIS – “Yes we do Lollipop. Last weeks Da Hit Squad attacked up, beating us down whilst our backs were turned. Now where we come from, folks don’t do things like that, folks settle their differences face to face, so we’re going to offer you that opportunity.”

STORM – “That’s right, we are making a challenge to Da Hit Squad. If you think you’re man enough to take on America’s Most Wanted then bring yourselves to the pay per view, Bound for Glory. Hell we’ll even put our tag team titles on the line. And you boys remember that they are our tag team titles.”

HARRIS – “And come Saturday 31st, it’ll be sorry about your damn luck!”

AMW leave the interview area.

TERRI – “Well there you have it, America’s Most Wanted have challenged Da Hit Squad to a match at Bound for Glory. Back to you Mike.”

50%

America’s Most Wanted lost overness.

8. 2004 – The Year Of Ki?

The final match of the evening was a rather random bout, which sees Low Ki take on Abyss. Low Ki is much smaller than Abyss, but by now everyone should realise that he is not one to be underestimated. He’d kick a hole through his own mother if she pissed him off enough. Sure enough, Ki starts off the match with his trademark offence, kicking away at the legs off Abyss, trying to bring him down to size. Ki whips him into the corner and rattles the big man with a huge Koppu kick. As Low Ki is psyching himself up, focusing his energy, banging his fists against the canvas, Christopher Daniels comes out onto the top of the ramp. He doesn’t move, just stands and watches, arms crossed. Low Ki nails Abyss with another kick, then catches a glimpse of Daniels standing there. He stands by the ropes and gives Daniels a ‘wtf’ type look. Low Ki turns around as Abyss is just getting to his feet. Ki goes for another kick, but his leg gets caught. Abyss spins Ki around and nails him with a big clothesline. The stronger Abyss starts to use his size and weight advantage, locking him in a Canadian Backbreaker, wearing down the back of Low Ki. It’s not enough to put his opponent away however, as Low Ki wriggles out of the hold and down the back of him. He begins kneeing at the lower back of Abyss, then brings him to his knees. Low Ki locks in his Dragon Clutch, forcing Abyss in almost no time at all. Low Ki looks back up the ramp, but the Fallen Angel is gone.

Low Ki bt Abyss (62/61/78) **1/4

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

9. B-Jizzle Goes Main Event

After the commercial break, BG James is sitting in the Barcalounger, beer in hand, mic in the other. He takes a sip of the brewski, then gets a sort of ‘we’re live’ signal from the cameraman, so he promptly jumps up and begins the show.

JAMES – “Well fans, B-Jizzle Intervizzle continues to rise up the charts, and this week we’ve hit the top, we’re the main event. And tonight we have possibly our highest profile guest so far, please welcome NWA Heavyweight champion, JEFF JARRETT!”

Jarrett comes down to the ring in classic street gear (blue jeans, plain shirt) and of course carrying his belt over his shoulder. He enters the ring taunts the crowd, standing on the corner ropes, which brings a chorus of boos. Eventually he takes his seat.

JAMES – “Lets not beat around the bush here Jeff, last week you cheated AJ Styles…”

JARRETT – “Whoa, hold up there, I didn’t cheat him, I beat him.”

JAMES – “Jeff, we’ve been friends for years now, but I saw what happened, and you cheated AJ out of the title.”

JARRETT – “And I’m telling you I didn’t cheat him out of shit. I beat him 1-2-3, centre of the ring. I do things my way, and that’s by any means necessary. I am the world champion, I am the top dog. Styles put it all on the line and lost. That’s not my fault.”

JAMES – “So you’re never giving him a title shot again, despite the way you won the match?”

JARRETT – “Did you not hear what I said? I didn’t cheat him, he lost the match fair and square. He screwed himself.”

JAMES – “Well why don’t we take a lot at the footage, see what the fans think.”

BG points towards the screen which begins showing the conclusion to last weeks main event. It shows Callis bringing the guitar to the ring and sliding it to Jarrett who proceeds to hit Styles with it.

JAMES – “Now I think it’s pretty clear looking at that.”

JARRETT – “Listen hear James, I didn’t cheat. I told you earlier, I play by my rules and they are by any means necessary. If it gets the job done it gets the job done.”

JAMES – “Yes but surely…”

JARRETT – “Look, I’m not answering this crap anymore. Just pull out your record book James, what does it say? It says I won. Does it say how I won? Now people that’s not what matters. I won, he lost. And now he doesn’t get another shot at my title. Tough shit.”

The interview is about to continue when Erik Watts’ music blares through the arena.

78%

10. A Final Twist In The Tale

Watts comes down to the ring and climbs inside, being handed a microphone by the ring announcer. He takes a position opposite Jarrett.

WATTS – “Well you see, I don’t buy that. Whether you admit it or not, you cheated AJ Styles out of the title that night, and now according to you he’s never getting another title shot again. Well Jeff, that doesn’t fly with me, and seeing as I have some pull around here, I’m giving Styles one more shot, and this time it’s going to be fair. It’s going to be you and Styles for that title, January 31st, Bound for Glory. But it’s not going to be a normal match. The problem seems to be that you can’t defend your belt like a man; one on one, no help, so you know what, I’m going to force you to, because it’s going to be you and Styles, one on one, inside a steel cage!”

Watts drops the mic and leaves the ring. Jarrett is stunned.

77%

-End Show-

CQ – 66%

TV – 4.58

I was going through my old shows etc and unfortunately I haven't saved my New Year's Eve show. Luckily this was just a Best of 2003 special, so it wasn't a proper show, but it's just a heads up if you wonder why there is a big gap.

Also, I didn't save a press conference, but all it did was announce that TNA had signed a deal with Fox for a prime time TV show. It's not really important so I won't bother to rewrite it .

So anyway, on with the shows:

14-1-04

Attendance - 2003

1. A New Face For A New Era

After an expansive brand new opening sequence, the new era of TNA begins with Don Callis coming down to ringside. He doesn’t join Tenay at the announce table, instead he demands a mic and walks up the steps, then into the ring.

CALLIS – “Welcome to Total Nonstop Action, live on FOX!!”

The 2000 fans in attendance cheer surprisingly. I suppose you have to pop for a brand new TV show.

CALLIS – “That’s right you hicks, it’s the beginning of a new era. This year is going to be the year of Don Callis’ TNA. I am going to show you people how a real promoter runs a company. There are going to be a lot of changes around here, and shortly you shall witness the first one. You will notice that I am not seated next to Mr Tenay over there. This is because I am giving up my announcing duties. I am a busy man, and if I am to take this company to number one I need to be watching over it at all times. And frankly, I’m just too damn good for commentary anyway. (Boos). So I am going to reveal my replacement. He is a man that I know can truly fill the void left by me, and he truly is a TREMENDOUS announcer. Ladies and gentlemen, your new color commentator, Mr Jeff G. Bailey!”

Bailey comes through the curtain and struts down the ramp, looking very proud of himself. He is suited and booted, and kind of looks like Bill Hicks. He apparently has somewhat of a cult following on the independent circuit, as there are a few cheers from the crowd. Bailey goes into the ring, shakes Callis’ hand then joins Tenay at the table, formally introducing himself to the viewers.

CALLIS – “And I’ll tell you one thing that’s not going to change, and that’s our world heavyweight champion, Jeff Jarrett. There is no way in hell that AJ Styles is walking out of the arena tonight with that belt.”

Callis drops the mic and leaves the ring so the show can get underway.

62%

Jeff G. Bailey gained overness.

2. A Divine Return

The first match of the new era marks the return of independent tag team Divine Storm. Although they have been criticised in the past for being ‘spot monkeys’, this match really proved that they can go toe to toe with the best. The Naturals really looked impressive in the match also, almost picking up the win with a powerbomb-crossbody combo. Russo tried his best to keep his boys in the game, but eventually the far more experienced Divine Storm triumphed. Chase Stevens tried to come off the top with an axe handle smash, but Quiet Storm hit him in the gut. Storm went behind the winded Stevens and impaled him with the Storm Cradle Driver for the win. This really was a match that opened many eyes as to the future of the tag division.

Divine Storm bt The Naturals (68/44/92) ***

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

3. The Prophecy Revealed

After the break, we come back to are plunged straight into a video promo featuring Christopher Daniels.

DANIELS – “As the New Year rolls in we all examine ourselves. We look at ourselves and put our position in society under the microscope. The truth is we are weak and searching for acceptance. We can never be happy with our lives. We are forever searching for answers, but really we’re asking all the wrong questions. All we need to do is open our eyes, and the path will become clear. Luckily, I am here. I am your savoir. I am the Fallen Angel. I am here to offer you salvation. All you have to do is follow me. The prophecy states that in order to reach the Promised Land we have to make sacrifices. We have to put our bodies on the line, put our souls on the line. We must fight not for ourselves, but for the Prophecy. We must battle for our brothers, battle for our sisters; our comrades in the holy quest.”

Daniels pauses for a second then stares at the camera, intensity in his eyes.

DANIELS – “I am the Fallen Angel. Follow me. Follow the Prophecy.”

The screen fades to black.

84%

4. A Matter Of Respect

We go back to the in-ring action with a match between Glen Gilbertti and John Walters. This encounter has been brewing for a while, mainly due to Walters constantly insulting the much more seasoned Gilbertti. Gilbertti demanded the match in order to teach Walters some respect. Gilbertti himself seems to be becoming a fan favourite, as his bad luck has drawn much sympathy from the fans. Walters is accompanied by Vince Russo, who makes his second appearance of the night. Gilbertti strangely starts the match with some impressive match work, attempting to embarrass the arrogant Walters, but technical wrestling seems to be Walters’ forte as he takes back the advantage, working over the arm of the former Dancing Queen. However, Walters’ overconfidence almost leads to his downfall when he gets caught on the top rope with a superplex. Gilbertti goes for the Last Dance stunner, but he’s distracted by Russo who jumps up onto the apron. The ref argues with Russo, and with his back turned, Walters gives Gilbertti a low blow then a Fisherman Buster for the win.

John Walters bt Glen Gilbertti (65/57/74) *3/4

John Walters gained overness. Glen Gilbertti lost overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

5. During The Commercial Break…

We do the classic Raw bit where the cameras caught some commotion in the back during the break, except its actually entertaining when you’ve got a non homosexual announce team calling it. The cameras show America’s Most Wanted taking their bags from the trunk of their car. They are just removing the final bags when suddenly from behind two men appear and begin pummelling them. It’s Da Hit Squad! Mack and Mafia are kicking seven shades of shit out of the tag champions. Mafia grabs Harris and belly to belly suplexes him on a car bonnet. Mack runs Storm head first into a concrete pillar. The champs have been left in a crumpled heap as DHS prove once again that they are hungry for the gold.

53%

Mack gained overness.

6. Destiny…

We go back in time with Raven at this point. No not literally, but he does gives us a look into the past. Raven is sitting on a swing set that’s looking fairly worse for wear. All around him is darkness. He’s back with the flannel. God it’s just like ECW again, except he looks fucking stupid bald. We are silent as he speaks, because when Raven speaks, you listen.

RAVEN – “Destiny, it’s a funny word. Some believe we are born with a destiny; a course of events we cannot change, only watch unfold before our very eyes. They believe that you can’t alter destiny, that you cannot influence it, that the Almighty has decided what will happen to us, when it will happen and how we will deal with it. Some cry, some despair, others thrive in the face of adversity. I’m not one to follow the norm. I destroyed my future long ago. I succumbed to the demons that lived around me. Alcohol, drugs, I’ve done it all. I’ve taken everything thrown in my path and lowered myself to it’s level. I know despair. I know adversity. I have lived alongside them my entire existence. But I make my own destiny, I decide my fate. So it leaves the question, what is to become of the Raven? Does he lower himself to the level of those thrown in his path? Jarrett, you have something, something I desire. You are next. But you threw yourself into my path last week. You came down to the ring, hit me with that belt and cost me my own personal battle, the battle against my moral evils. My battle against Father Mitchell and the monster they call Gacy. Your time shall come too, and sooner than you think. In fact, the date is set – January 31st, Bound for Glory. That shall be our final battle. That will be the night where I shall fight my demons and finally move on, to my destiny, my own personal goal, and Jarrett that is you. Saturday January 31st, Bound for Glory, the night the war shall be won. Quote the Raven, nevermore.”

Fade out.

88%

7. The Return Of An Old Favourite

We come back from another riveting Raven promo to find our three X-Division competitors in the ring. It’s a first time out for Jacobs and Briscoe. Jacobs has really hit the independent scene this past year, going from virtual nobody to a real household name. It’s the furry boots that’s done it. We are about ready to kick things off when some familiar music blares through the arena. The crowd are on their feet. They seem to know something we don’t. Someone’s running down the ramp. It’s the Amazing Red!! He wasn’t supposed to be back for months! I guess this one’s going to be a 4-way dance. The fans are not disappointed by Red’s return. He busts out all the high-energy trademark offence that has made him a real fan favourite here in TNA. A nice looking spot where Red kicks off the back of Jacobs, hitting his Red Star Press on Kazarian. Briscoe nearly gets the win with a J-Driller on Red, but Jacobs breaks up the count, only to be ruined by a hellacious lariat by Kazarian. Red has the crowd right behind him and eventually picks up the victory with the Code Red on Briscoe. Amazing Red goes on to next week to face Paul London for the X-Division title.

Amazing Red bt Jay Briscoe, Jimmy Jacobs and Frankie Kazarian (64/50/78) **3/4

8. B-Jizzle Goes Prime Time

For those viewers who have never seen this segment before , this is your classic host bit, but with a little extra pazaz. This is not Highlight of the Night, the Heartbreak Hotel or Pipers Pit, this is B-Jizzle Intervizzle. No frills, just a couple of Barcaloungers and a cooler full of beer. BG James is sitting in the ring awaiting his guest. Out comes the ‘New F’n Show’ Jerry Lynn.

JAMES – “Well howdy Jerry, how is life treating you?”

LYNN – “Life’s pretty good thanks BG. How about yourself?”

JAMES – “Well you know, things are always kicking in the B-Jizzle camp. If I aint out hangin’ with mah dawgs, I’m kicking some keester in the ring...but anyway. Well Jerry, two weeks ago you were declared ninth best wrestler in North America, which must’ve been quite an honour. My question is, what does 2004 hold for Jerry Lynn?”

LYNN – “Well you know BG I was quite surprised to not see your name on the list..”

JAMES – “You know how it is Jerry, I mean I can’t be top every year. I decided I’d step aside and give the others their props.”

LYNN – “Heh, yeah I know what you mean. It’s really a great thing for me, I mean I’ve come out here every week and do what I do, and the fans seem to appreciate it. I mean it’s what Vince fired me for. I’d like to thank all the TNA fans, because they’re why I wrestle. When you go out there and you know you’ve given those people their money’s worth, and you know they appreciate it…”

Lynn is interrupted by the arrival of Simon Diamond on the stage.

DIAMOND – “Woah woah woah, Jerry please shut the hell up. I feel like I’m watching a reunion episode of Oprah. Seriously James, get Jerry a Kleenex, I think he’s about to start blubbering. Hell whilst your at it get him a dress and a pair of fucking panties. You shave that stupid looking beard off and James is sat their interviewing the hussy from Showgirls. Yes, you’ve guessed it, Simon’s got a problem, and once again Simon’s problem is with that washed-up-never-was sitting in the ring. No it’s not you Rockabilly, it’s the ‘Whole F’n Nothing’ sitting with you. You know where I placed on that list. Sixty forth. What the hell is that? Simon is the best technical wrestler in the world today, and he’s placed behind a nobody like Jerry Lynn? Simon definitely has a problem with that.”

Diamond starts walking towards the ring, then jumps on the apron, and into the ring. Jerry rises to meet him.

LYNN – “You know what Simon, I’ve got a problem with all your whining. You know how I got where I am today? It was through hard fucking work. I busted my ass every single night entertaining these fans. I did whatever was asked of me. I worked behind a mask, I did the job and I made others look good. I took punks like you and made them look one hundred times better than they actually are.”

DIAMOND – “Listen boy, Simon is not amused by your little charade. You want to put your money where your mouth is? You want Simon to take you to school? That’s fine, because January 31st, Bound for Glory, it’s going to be me and you, one on one…”

Lynn snatches the mic away.

LYNN – “You know what Simon, I’m not quite happy with that. I mean kicking your ass is going to be fun, but how about we make things a tad more interesting. You think you’re the best technical wrestler in the world, well prove it hotshot, because it’s going to be me and you in a submission match!”

Simon seems a little shocked by this announcement. He looks like he’s got more than he bargained for. His look turns to anger as he gives Lynn a final stare than leaves the ring.

70%

Simon Diamond gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

9. The Showdown

The show finally comes down to this – the match everyone has been waiting to see. Jeff Jarrett. AJ Styles. World title. Finally, after weeks and weeks of ducking and diving, Jarrett has accepted the challenge of AJ Styles and has put the belt on the line. Both men are alone as the come down to the ring. No Callis in the corner for Jarrett. Looks like he’s going to do this one alone. Finally both men lock up. You know the drill by now. The go back and forth, with neither man being able to take a significant advantage. Styles tries to focus on the neck of Jarrett, using a variety of neck cranks and holds to weaken it. Jarrett goes for the right knee of Styles. You take away his mobility and he’s lost. Styles is all about the fast paced, high risk offence. Styles gets a near fall after a smooth Reverse DDT. Jarrett gets one of his own after reversing a suplex into a small package. Styles gets a 2 and a half with a Frog Splash. Jarrett almost retains via submission, but Styles just about makes his way to the ropes whilst in the Figure 4. Jarrett goes for clothesline, Styles ducks. German suplex. Styles rolls it through straight into a backdrop to front face pancake. Styles gives Jarrett a guillotine legdrop to the back of the neck. He lifts Jarrett to his feet. Kick to the gut. Piledriver by Styles. Jarrett is lying motionless on the canvas. Styles signals to the crowd for the Styles Clash. He lifts Jarrett up, but the champ pushes him into referee Rudy Charles. The ref is down. Styles lifts Jarrett back up. He sets up for the Styles Clash, but Jarrett low blows him. He goes for the Stroke, but Styles elbows his way out of it. He spins Jarrett round. Kick. Styles Clash! Styles goes to make the cover, but the ref is still out. Styles tries to revive him. Here comes Don Callis. He’s got a guitar in hand. He slides it to Jarrett, then jumps up on the apron. Styles comes over and clocks Callis, sending him to the floor. Styles turns round straight into the guitar shot! Jarrett picks him up off the mat, avoiding the shards of a poorly made guitar, and nails the Stroke! He makes the cover as the ref is just recovering. 1…2…3! Jarrett cheats his way to victory once again. Callis and Jarrett celebrate up the ramp as Styles is left to rue another unjust loss.

Jeff Jarrett bt AJ Styles (86/90/80) ***

-End Show-

CQ – 70%

TV – 4.94

Running Man - 8/10

24-12-03

Attendance - 3442

0. The New F’n Show Does It Again

The show opens up with another opening bout featuring Jerry Lynn. Why they are wasting him at the beginning of the show I will never know, but it could be much worse I suppose, he could be stuck on defending a light heavyweight title on some B show. His partner for tonight is Erik Watts. Don Callis booked this match after the climax to last week’s main event, when they tried to interfere and help AJ Styles. Their opponents are Lynn’s rivals Simon and Swinger. As you would expect with any Jerry Lynn match it was watchable. Diamond, Swinger and even Watts didn’t disappoint either, which is surprising because Watts kinda blows. There are some heated exchanges between Diamond and Lynn, including Lynn reversing a Northern Lights suplex into a swinging DDT. Swinger got a near fall on Watts after a sunset flip, but Lynn broke up the count. Watts came back and tried to Chokeslam Swinger, but Diamond hit him with a low blow. Lynn comes back in and spins Diamond around. Problem Solver?! Jerry makes the cover and scores the win over his nemesis.

Jerry Lynn and Erik Watts bt Simon and Swinger (72/64/81) **1/2

1. ‘A Very B-Jizzle Christmas’ Part I

We begin the very first video package of the evening, and I know that it needs no introduction. See without further ado…

NWA-TNA Presents…

A 4LK Production…

A Very B-Jizzle Xmas

(Christmas music plays and the festive font fades out slowly. We hand over to the narrator)

NARRATOR – “'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

Except for one man, the hero of our story.

Infront of the fire sat our boy, the one they call B-Jizzle,

Who’s wrestling skills were off the hizzle,

But something was not right, there was something wrong in the air

Then came a knock at the door from an unlikely pair."

(After a furious knocking at the door, James gets up from his seat and opens the door. The camera view is empty for a split second, before it pans down and we see, making their return to TNA, Teo and Puppet)

TEO – “BG, you’ve got to come quickly, it’s an emergency.”

JAMES – “Why, what’s up?”

PUPPET – “It’s Santa. He’s been kidnapped.”

JAMES – “But it’s Christmas Eve! If Santa isn’t afford, who will deliver all the presents?”

TEO – “That’s why we need your help.”

JAMES – “But what can I do?”

PUPPET – “It’s all up to you B-Jizzle, you’ve got to save Christmas!”

(We freeze frame on this dramatic predicament and go back to ringside.)

83%

2. By The Skin Of Their Teeth

The next match is also a product of Callis’ attempted revenge from last week. The NWA Tag Team champions have been forced to defend their titles against not one, but two of Callis’ handpicked opponents: Da Hit Squad and the Red Shirt Security. The odds seem to be firmly stacked against the champs especially as Mafia and Mack seem to have singled them out as their targets here in TNA. The match starts off badly for AMW as they are double teamed. The tides turn after Gage attempts to make the cover, but Mafia pulls him off. The two heel teams square up and engage in a shoving match. They begin to brawl and don’t notice Harris and Storm getting back to their feet. Both teams are spun around and knocked down with double clotheslines. Storm and Harris call for their opponents to get back up and then they nail them with stereo dropkicks. They take it to the challengers, eventually throwing Mack and Northcutt out of the ring. Gage and Mafia get whipped into opposite corners. AMW signal to each other then whip them across the ring. Gage meets a powerslam from Harris, but Mafia ducks behind Storm. Half nelson suplex! Sick move! Mafia then turns his attention to Harris. He ducks the clothesline and whips Harris into the ropes. Belly to belly suplex. Mafia makes the cover but Harris kicks out at two. He lifts Harris to his feet again. Kick to the gut. Mafia goes for an Exploder, but Harris elbows out of it. As Mafia goes to whip Harris into the ropes, Northcutt jumps up onto the apron with a chair. Harris reverses and sends Mafia flying into the chair! Northcutt flies off into the guardrail and Mafia staggers back. Harris rolls him up. 1, 2, 3. AMW have retained there titles, but barely.

America’s Most Wanted bt Da Hit Squad and Red Shirt Security (65/51/79) **

The NWA Tag Titles gained image.

3. ‘A Very B-Jizzle Christmas’ Part II

Cue narration…

NARRATOR – “And so our heros set off on their epic quest,

As B-Jizzle and his two companions made their way West.

They sort information from three noble wise men,

Who BG knew he could count on time and again.

And after battling through the snow and the sleet,

They reached their destination of one hundred and ninth street.”

(B-Jizzle gave three knocks on the door. It creaked open and our informants appeared. It’s none other than Ron Killings, Shark Boy and Sonjay Dutt)

KILLINGS – “Hey hey hey, what can we do for y’all? Come to party this fine Christmas Eve?”

JAMES – “No I’m afraid, we are men on a mission, no time to party.”

DUTT – “No time to party? Woah, something must be wrong.”

JAMES - “Indeed my Hindu friend there is. Santa…has been kidnapped!”

SHARK BOY – “(Shocked murmur)”

KILLINGS – “Santa? Kidnapped? Holy shizzle B-Jizzle.”

JAMES – “I know, and I know what I’ve got to do. It’s up to me. I have to save Christmas!”

DUTT – “But who could’ve done such an evil thing?”

KILLINGS – “I think I know who.”

JAMES – “You don’t mean..”

KILLINGS – “Yes, I do, I’m talking about the only man evil enough to kidnap Santa Claus…BRIAN LAWLER!!!”

JAMES – “Son of a… Well I’ve got to go find him and save Santa. Any idea where he might be holding him?”

SHARK BOY – “(Muffled mumbles)”

JAMES – “What?”

DUTT – “He said he’s probably holding him in his lair, which is exactly 2 miles east of here, however the journey will not be easy as there is a blizzard outside and we only have one stead to guide you.”

JAMES – “He said all that? Ah well, anyway, what is this stead you speak of?”

(Killings leads out Glen Gilbertti dressed in a horse’s costume)

JAMES – “Hmmm he looks very erm (snickers)”

DISCO – “Oh come on, this is stupid”

DUTT – “Horses don’t talk Glen.”

DISCO – “(Grumbles)”

DUTT – “You must take this mighty stead and ride it across the snowy plains. You will know when you have arrived at Lawler’s lair. We can’t join you on your quest, as the storm has become too severe, but we wish you luck.”

JAMES – “Thank you, and don’t worry, I will succeed and I will save Christmas. Let us ride mighty stead.”

(James jumps on the back of Gilbertti and proceeds to ride him out of the door into the snowstorm.)

78%

4. Walters Isn’t Down With The Disco

John Walters is sitting in the back watching the monitor, which is showing a Very B-Jizzle Xmas Part II. It shows Glen Gilbertti as a horse and Walters shakes his head then turns to a couple of the boys.

WALTERS – “Jeez, what a sap.”

(The other workers chuckle)

WALTERS – “Guess he’ll be asking for some credibility this Christmas. What a joke.”

(Gilbertti walks into the locker room as Walters is insulting him)

DISCO – “What was that Walters?”

WALTERS – “You heard me Gilbertti, you’re a joke.”

DISCO – “You know back when I was just starting out we respected the veteran workers.”

WALTERS – “You expect me to respect you? No one respects you. You’re the laughing stock of this company.”

DISCO – “You know what Walters, why don’t you put your money where you mouth is? First show of 2004, me and you tough guy, and I will put you in your place and show you why you will respect me.”

The two slowly back away and we go to a commercial break.

68%

John Walters gained overness.

-DirectTV Adverts-

5. London Calling

After the break we are ready for the second title match of the evening, which will see Paul London take on Michael Shane. The former champion is accompanied as always by the Franchise, Shane Douglas. Word in the IWC is that the fans aren’t buying the whole Franchise bit and wish that TNA would just drop Douglas. Does this mean that he might finally fuck off from our screens? Anyway, Shane and London put on a good match up. London and Shane are fairly familiar with each other outside of TNA, which lead to a few great looking spots, including London catching the superkick attempt into a Dragon screw legwhip then a Figure Four rollup, but it only got a two count. Shane reversed London’s dropsault into a vicious looking powerbomb. Shane went up to the top rope looking for his trademark elbow drop, but London moved out of the way at the last second. London gets up and gives Shane a double jump moonsault, but Shane kicks out. Shane blocks a suplex attempt into a sunset flip and almost gets the win, but London gets his shoulders up at the last second. Shane gets up and stands in the corner. He begins stomping his foot against the canvas. London is getting back to his feet. Stomp, stomp. London steadies himself. Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. Shane charges across the ring and goes for the Superkick, but London ducks under. Superkick of his own! Shane is out. London points upwards, showing the crowd he’s going for his trademark SSP. He turns around…straight into a chairshot from Shane Douglas! The ref calls for the bell. He’s disqualified Michael Shane. London starts getting back to his feet, but gets clocked in the back with the chair. The ref tries to stop this heinous attack, but he takes a superkick from Shane for his troubles. Shane and Douglas start stomping away at London. Here comes Chris Sabin! He jumps onto the apron and nails Shane with a right hand. Sabin springboard dropkicks Douglas, sending him flying under the bottom rope. Sabin stands above the fallen London, stopping the heels from attacking.

Paul London bt Michael Shane by DQ (69/51/88) ***

The X-Division title gained image.

6. ‘A Very B-Jizzle Christmas’ Part III

And now to the final part of our seasonal drama…

NARRATOR – “B-Jizzle made his way across the snowy plains,

Riding his disco loving stead, pulling tightly at his reigns.

Sure enough, as he had been told, he knew he’d found Lawler’s lair,

As there was a large neon sign standing twelve feet in the air.

So B-Jizzle dismounted off his horse, and readied himself for war,

Because some shizzle was about to go down, at it was gunna be hardcore."

(B-Jizzle got off Gilbertti and tied him to a post. He struggled to the door of Lawler’s lair through the blizzard, and pushed a door open. Inside he could see Lawler and his goons.)

LAWLER – “Mwahahaha. Now the world will have to listen to me, now they’ll stop thinking ‘Brian Lawler – son of Jerry’ and remember me as ‘Brain Lawler – the man who stole Christmas’. And there’s no one to stop me!”

JAMES – “Don’t speak to soon Brian.”

(James jumps out from his hiding place.)

LAWLER – “BG James, my long time nemesis! I had a feeling you would try and stop me.”

JAMES – “Your days are numbered Brian, so why don’t you let Santa go and give back Christmas.”

LAWLER – “Never! I’m sick of people, always comparing me to my dad. I am Brian Lawler! I am not just the son of Jerry, I am my own man, and people will never forget me!”

JAMES – “I’m sorry Brian, but I just can’t let you do this.”

LAWLER – “You can try and stop me, but you’ll have to get through my army of Ninjas first!!”

(From nowhere 5 or 6 Ninjas appear. Ok, not quite an army, but it’ll do. They begin circling James, and then we go into Batman mode. B-Jizzle starts fighting them off with melodramatic strikes with ‘POW’ ‘SOCK and ‘KAPLUNK’ appearing in the sky. The final Ninja is standing their groggy and James gives him the Shake, Rattle and Roll. B-Jizzle turns his attention to Lawler, who is escaping out a side door.)

LAWLER – “You may have won this round James, but I’ll be back.”

(Lawler slams the door. James tries to open it, but its locked tight. B-Jizzle turns his attention back to his original target – Santa. He sees an office chair which looks to be where Santa is being held. He spins it around, and it reveals Santa…)

SANTA – “Ho ho ho if you weeeeeeeeeeeeell. Well done BG, you’ve saved Christmas for all those funky little monkeys out there. I tried to fight them up, but they was clubberin’ BG, I tell you they was clubberin’.”

JAMES – “It’s ok Dus..I mean Santa. But hurry, it’s almost midnight on Christmas Eve and you need to deliver all your presents.”

SANTA – “You’re right, I gotta fly. (Santa waddles over and jumps into his slay). On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer, on Vixen, if you weeeeeeell, on Comet, on Cupid, on Donner, on Blitzen…”

Santa flies off into the night and BG stands tall, knowing that once again Christmas had been saved.

‘End’

77%

7. The Battle Is Won But The War Is Not Over

Our main event tonight is a no disqualification bout between the monster that is Gacy and Raven. Gacy comes out to the ring accompanied as always by Father Mitchell. Gacy slowly makes his way down the ramp, dragging his shovel behind him. He seems prepared for the match. Soon the arena goes black and Raven appears. He doesn’t waste anytime, sliding into the ring, and the two batter each other with a barrage of right hands. Raven is the first to bring a weapon into the fray, nailing Gacy with a stiff chairshot on the outside. He tries to whip Gacy into the ropes, but it’s reversed and Raven hits the steel hard. Gacy begins to work the smaller Raven over, tossing him around the outside, using his size advantage. He goes back inside with Raven busted open. I’m talking about a 0.6 on the Muta scale. Gacy throws Raven inside the ring. He whips him into the ropes, but Raven ducks. Chopblock on Gacy. Raven grabs the chair and sets it up in the ring. He whips Gacy into the ropes. Drop toe hold onto the chair! Raven makes the cover, but only gets a 1 count. Gacy sits up. Knee to the face. Raven makes the cover again, but only gets a 1. He leaves the ring and pulls out a trashcan from under the ring. Raven hits Gacy in the skull with the trashcan, denting it. Raven puts the can on the head of Gacy, then grabs his shovel. He clocks Gacy in the head with the shovel, sending an almighty clank throughout the arena. Gacy wobbles and then another shovel shot finally sends him to the mat. Raven leaves the ring once again and pulls out a table. He sets it up in the corner, then goes back to work on Gacy, who is just recovering. Raven whips him into the opposite corner to the table. He starts kneeing Gacy in the gut. Raven runs towards Gacy and gives him a big clothesline. Surprise, surprise, with Raven on top, Jeff Jarrett runs down to the ring. Just as Raven is giving Gacy a 10 punch, Jarrett jumps onto the apron and nails him with his title belt. Raven gets knocked off the ropes, allowing Gacy to recover. He pulls Raven between his legs then gives him a running powerbomb through the table! Gacy makes the cover and wins the match, thanks to the interference of Jeff Jarrett. After the match, yes you’ve guessed it, Gacy and Jarrett continue the beatdown. Jarrett sets up another table on the outside. Gacy lifts Raven onto his shoulder and gets ready to deliver another powerbomb, but AJ Styles jumps into the ring. He came through the crowd. Gacy drops Raven and turns his attention to Styles, who ducks under the attack and gives him a big spinning wheel kick, sending Gacy through the ropes. Jarrett decides not to get involved and stays on the outside.

Gacy bt Raven (63/59/67) *

Raven lost overness. Gacy gained overness.

8. Styles Wants His Championship Clash

Styles demands that a mic. Our ring announcers throw one to him.

STYLES – “Jeff, this is going to end. I want you to stop being a little bitch and face me, like a man. For weeks and weeks now you have been ducking me, hiding from me, denying me what is rightfully mine: that title belt. You stole it from me and I want it back! What else do I have to do Jeff? I’ve pinned you right here in the centre of the ring. I’ve made you tap right here in the centre of this very ring. And last week I beat Abyss in a steel cage match. Then you attacked me Jeff, attacked me like the coward, did this to me(points to the bandage on his forehead). So Jeff, I’m out here and I am demanding I get my title shot. Now are you going to give it to me or am going to have to make you?!”

Jarrett grabs a mic.

JARRETT – “You want your title shot, hotshot. You really think you’re good enough to go one on one with the Chosen One? Well you got it. But there will be a stipulation. If I win the match then you never get a title shot whilst I am champion. So you better get your rest boy, because come January 7th, your ass is mine!”

Jarrett drops the mic and the shows fades out.

84%

-End Show-

CQ – 73%

PPV - 0.21

NOTE - The original show did continue bolding in various places, like the others prior to this one, but I forgot to save the version of some shows with the formatting already on them. Apologies if this makes your reading more difficult, but I can't really be bothered to do it again.

EDIT:  I just checked, and you never said in the last show, so who joined Tenay THIS week on commentary?

←

Don Callis was on commentary with Tenay again. I probably should've mentioned it. Oh well

17-12-03

Attendance - 3418

0. Problem Not Quite Solved

After a brief promotional video building up this week’s main event between Abyss and AJ Styles, we begin our show. We open with a much more high profile bout than usual, as Jerry Lynn takes on Johnny Swinger. Apparently Jerry wanted a match with Diamond, but he claimed he couldn’t compete due to some sort of ‘back injury’. Either way, we’re sure to get a good opening to tonight’s show. Jerry comes out to the ring to a large pop from the crowd. He stands in the ring awaiting the arrival of his opponent, and sure enough out comes Swinger, but without Simon. The two start off nicely, with Lynn carrying most of the match, not surprisingly. Jerry comes back with some nice signature moves such as a sunset flip powerbomb off the top. Swinger uses some underhanded heel tactics and took back the momentum, but got cocky taunting the crowd which allowed Lynn to reverse a suplex attempt by dropping down the back and nailing a Cradle Piledriver for the win. Lynn celebrated his victory after the match, but the appearance of Simon Diamond spoiled the party. He jumped into the ring and nailed Lynn in the back with a steel chair! He and Swinger began stomping away then Diamond put Jerry’s knee inside the chair, and stomped down on it, attempting to injure his enemy. They tried again, but officials jumped in the ring and broke it up. Simon and Swinger left the ring looking pleased with themselves as Lynn was helped to the locker room.

Jerry Lynn bt Johnny Swinger (69/59/80) **1/4

1. Gilbertti The Unwanted

Backstage we see the Naturals and their manager Vince Russo are discussing tactics when they are suddenly interrupted by Glen Gilbertti.

DISCO – “Hey guys, word in the back is that you’re looking for a third man for your six man tag match tonight, well look no further ‘cos Glen Gilbertti is going to save the day!”

RUSSO – “Um well Glen, the thing is you’re not really what we’re looking for.”

DISCO – “Wh-what do you mean?”

RUSSO – “Well Russo Inc is about the cutting edge of wrestling, we’re looking for the new stars, you know, the next generation, like, like this guy.”

Russo sees John Walters walking past then grabs him.

RUSSO – “Hey John, how do you fancy teaming up with the Naturals tonight?”

WALTERS – “Sure.”

Gilbertti looks shocked.

GILBERTTI – “You picked him over me! But I’m Glen Gilbertti, I’m in my prime..”

WALTERS – “In your prime? Your not even a has-been, you’re a never-was.”

Walters, Russo and the Naturals walk off, leaving Gilbertti looking stunned. He’s got that ‘my dog just got run over’ look on his face. Poor Disco.

60%

John Walters gained overness.

2. Aces Are Wild

As we leave Disco to recover from his rejection we prepare for our next match, which pits Danny Doring and Roadkill against Sonny Siaki and David Young. Oh and of course, the ex-ECWers are accompanied to the ring by Trinity. Roadkill looks to have kept in quite good shape, seeing as he hasn’t been in a national wrestling promotion for a good while. Not a bad match, but nothing spectacular. Young proves once again why he is a fringe man in TNA, wowing the crowd with his mediocrity, however he did get the first near fall of the match with a spinebuster, but Doring broke up the count. Doring and Roadkill took us back in time and showed us what we missed when ECW closed down, giving Young and Siaki some of their trademark moves. They look to have won the match when they through Young out of the ring and isolated Siaki. After a flying splash-legdrop combo, they looked to be setting up Siaki for the Buggy Bag. One of the TNA girls got out of her cage and ran down to the ring. She knocked Trinity down which distracted the ref and Roadkill, who checked to see if she was ok. The TNA girl slid into the ring and gave Doring a Low Blow of Doom, which allowed Siaki to school boy him. Roadkill tried to break up the count, but Young pulls him to the outside, giving Siaki the easy 1-2-3. Siaki, Young and the mystery woman retreat up the ramp.

Sonny Siaki and David Young bt Danny Doring and Roadkill (65/56/75) *3/4

David Young gained overness.

3. Siaki’s New Lady Friend

As the heels reach a safe distance, they halt their running away and turn towards their foes. Siaki has a mic.

SIAKI – “Well I guess the time is right to introduce the new lady in my life. This is Traci.”

Siaki moves away and twirls her round like a doll in a music box.

SIAKI – “Take a look at that, now that’s a real woman, not like that cheap whore in the ring, Traci knows how to treat her man, and most of all she can knows how to satisfy a superstar.”

Siaki drops the mic and the three make their way through the curtain.

72%

Traci gained overness.

4. 6-Man Showcase

The newest members of the Live Kru were to make their debut in team colours, as Shark Boy, Sonjay Dutt and Ron Killings took on the Russo threesome of the Naturals and John Walters. Although some fans are cringing at the use of Russo, it’s not a long-term thing apparently. He still had around a year of his contract remaining, so the bookers decided to team him with some new guys to get them over. Guys backstage are said to be very high on Walters and that the teaming of him with some young stars is a stepping stone to greater things. Lets hope so. Despite the lack of crowd reaction, the 6 men put on a solid bout, with each man getting their fair share of offence. The Naturals get a near fall after a nice Powerbomb-Clothesline combo. Sonjay and Shark Boy showed that they are fitting into the Kru perfectly with some good tandem offence, such as an old skool double atomic drop, then Shark Boy bit Douglas’ behind. Walters started to take control after giving Sonjay a dragon screw leg whip. He started stomping away at the knee of Sonjay, attempting to ground him. He put Dutt’s leg on the rope and jumped down on the joint. He makes the tag to Stevens who slingshots over the top rope and legdrops the injured knee. He goes for a figure four roll up, but Killings breaks up the count. This brings all six man into the ring and a mass brawl erupts. Killings reverses an attack by Douglas into his signiture sitout front suplex. Walters throws Killings to the outside, then nails a vaulting bodypress. This leaves Dutt, Stevens and Shark Boy in the ring. Dutt crawls over and makes a desperation tag to SB. Shark Boy comes in like a bowl of fire (get it, bowl, not house). He nails a back suplex then a swinging neckbreaker. He whips Stevens into the corner and climbs the turnbuckle. Diamond Dust! Shark Boy makes the cover and ends his Live Kru debut on a high.

Live Kru (Shark Boy, Sonjay Dutt and Ron Killings) bt John Walters and the Naturals (60/48/73) *1/4

5. The New X-Dizzle Champion Speaks

After seeing his Live Kru brothers triumph in their debut match, B-Jizzle BG James comes down to the ring. He slaps hands with the fans before climbing the steps, wiping his feet and entering the Intervizzle set. He gets himself comfortable in the lounger before Paul London makes his way to the ring.

JAMES – “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome my guest on the Intervizzle this week, our new X-Division champion, Paul London!”

London gets a fairly big pop from the crowd. Footage of how he won the title is shown, including him unmasking then nailing the SSP.

JAMES – “Well Paul, that was an impressive win last week. How did it feel to win the X-Division title?”

LONDON – “Well to be honest BG, it didn’t really sink in till the day after when I woke up, looked across the room and saw the belt, then I realised that I was the X-Division champion of this great company, something which I am proud to be.”

JAMES – “Aight, that’s deep. Well there has been a lot of hype amongst the smaaarrt maaarrkks about your departure from the WWE.”

LONDON – “I know, I’ve heard it too. A lot of people have been talking about me, saying that signing that contract was a big mistake, saying I should’ve stayed on the independent circuit, but I made my decision and I stand by it. I don’t know why I was released, but all I know is…”

London is interrupted by the sound of Michael Shane’s music. Shane makes his way down the ramp, accompanied by the Franchise Shane Douglas. Shane snatches the mic from London.

SHANE – “I’ll tell you why you were released: because you suck! You are nothing Paul, a nobody, a no talent chump. I am the next Franchise. You know what that means? It means that I am the best wrestler in the world today, and that belt is mine! (Shane taps Paul London’s belt, which is hanging over his shoulder). You stole that from me! You and that coward Chris Sabin double teamed me, that’s the only way you won that belt, by cheating! You wouldn’t have a chance if you faced the Franchise Michael Shane one on one.”

LONDON – “(London gets in Shane’s face). You think that eh? Well I’ve got an idea. Why don’t we have a match next week? That’s right Shane, you, me, X-Division title match. How does that sound, chump? (London shoves/pokes Shane with his index finger)”

Shane backs away in disgust, then he turns around and clocks London with a right hand! Douglas and London start stomping away at London. James tries to break it up, but he suffers a few strikes for his troubles. Here comes Chris Sabin! Sabin charges to the ring and sends the Franchises scurrying. Sabin stands tall in the ring and Shane and Shane escape.

58%

Michael Shane gained overness.

6. Mack Daddy Delivers

Before the bout we see a video, which showed how this match came to be. BG James is already in the ring as Da Hit Squad make their way out to ringside. Many of our fans on the internet were hoping that we would see Mafia in action, but apparently it’s going to be his partner Mack taking on BG. The bell rings and the two go at it, but the fans are fairly disappointed with the resulting match. In fact the only spot worth talking about was when James went for his ‘Shake, Rattle and Roll’ only for Mack to duck it and nail a vicious looking backdrop. Eventually Mafia jumped up on the apron, distracting James, who turned back round straight into a Tiger Bomb for the win. Very meh.

Mack bt BG James (58/51/68) 3/4*

Mack gained overness. James lost overness.

7. The Gauntlet Is Laid Down

The screen fades to black and then we are transported to a dark place, laden with mysterious fog. Out of the distance emerges some creepy looking figures, who reveal themselves as Gacy and Father James Mitchell.

MITCHELL – “Darkness, the best friend of the forsaken, where the demented come out to play. Raven, soon this is the place you will call home. We will banish you to this place. You will be sent from whence you came, this place, this sickening mixture of personal dementia and sorrow. This is where you belong. You have no strength, no self belief. You are a pit of self pity – the product of drug and alcohol abuse. We have no time for your kind. We are here to cleanse the world of people like you; the impure. You have no value to society. You have no place in our world. You don’t belong, yet you refuse to leave, so we must make you. Battle is such an unpleasant business, yet it is a means to an end; the end of you. Next week, you Raven versus this man, the soul-killer, Gacy, no disqualification. What do you say? Are you going to play our game? Will you stay and fight or run like the coward you are?”

In the background Gacy makes the trademark pose of Raven as we fade back into the mist.

71%

Gacy gained overness. Mitchell gained overness.

8. Brutality

The video segment gives the ring crew time to assemble the cage around the ring for our main event. It’s your standard NWA cage, you know the one the WWE tried to rip off when they had the classic blue one. Why did they do that? The blue cage was great. Ah well, it makes no difference to us, their loss is our gain. Out comes Abyss, who seems to be fairly over as a monster, stomping down the ramp. Then it’s time for our hero, the one and only AJ Styles. He gets through the door only to be met by Abyss, and the monster goes to work on him straight away. Abyss dominates for much of the early going, tossing him around like a rag doll, into the turnbuckles and the cage. He picked Styles up over his shoulder and rams him head first into the steel. Abyss picks him up again and slams him headfirst against the mesh cage once again. Styles is busted open! Abyss tries to ram him against the cage once again, but Styles drops down the back and pushes Abyss in. The monster bounces back into an enziguri. Styles uses some of his high risk moves to beat the big man down, including a reverse DDT off the second rope. He goes up to the top rope, but Abyss pushes the ref into the ropes, crotching him. Abyss climbs up onto the top rope with Styles. Superplex! Both men bounced off the mat! The big man sat up and dragged Styles towards the cage. He grabs Styles’ head and grates it against the mesh of the cage. That’s sick! Abyss is one sadistic human being. Abyss keeps beating away at Styles, using some power offence. He nails a powerslam, but only gets a 2 count. Abyss decides that the way forward is ascending the turnbuckle, which we all know is going to get bad before it gets good. Styles gets his second wind and runs up the corner, sending Abyss crashing to the mat with a hurricanrana. Styles is getting ‘G’ed up and starts laying on the moves thickly. Facebuster. Abyss gets up. Forearm smashes. Styles bounces against the ropes. Flying headscissors. Styles stands up on the second rope. He awaits Abyss to get up. Styles jumps off and plants Abyss with a hellacious DDT! Styles pulls Abyss to his feet. He goes for a Styles Clash, but Abyss is too big. He tries to backbody drop Styles, but he rolls through into a sunset flip. One…two, no Abyss kicks out. Both men get back up. Abyss swings, but misses. Low blow by Styles. He hooks Abyss up. He goes for the Styles Clash again, and this time hooks it in! Styles Clash to Abyss! Styles makes the cover! One…two…three! AJ Styles has beaten Abyss in a brutal cage match. The referee raises Styles’ hand as the wipes off the crimson mask and celebrates the win. The celebrations are cut short at the arrival of Jeff Jarrett. He runs down to the ring and begins climbing the cage. Here they all come. Gage and Northcutt start running down the aisle and try entering the cage. Callis gets up from his commentary position and brings a chair in. They begin assaulting Styles. He briefly fights back, but his resistance is ended by a chairshot from Abyss. Jarrett pulls out some handcuffs and cuffs Styles to the top rope. He winds up a chairshot, but stops. Business just picked up. Here comes Jerry Lynn, Erik Watts and Americas Most Wanted. They try and enter the cage, but their attempts are thwarted by the heels. Styles is a sitting duck, and once again Jarrett winds up for the chairshot. The lights go out. Everyone is confused, then they come back on. Raven is in the ring! He’s got a chair! He blasts Northcutt, then Gage. Jarrett and Callis escape the cage as Raven plants Abyss with a wicked shot. As the champ and commish escape through the crowd, the faces jump into the ring to check on their fallen comrade.

AJ Styles bt Abyss (70/67/74) **

-End Show-

CQ – 64%

PPV – 0.21

10-12-03

Attendance - 3679

0. Callis Takes His Seat

After the opening credits roll, Don West and Mike Tenay welcome us to tonights show. They run through the card, and as usual West seems excited. Their bantering is halted by the unexpected arrival of Don Callis, lead down to the ring by his goons, Gage and Northcutt. They strut down to the ring, Callis, as usual, looking like the cat who got the cream. Gage and ‘Big Kev’ hold the ropes open for the boss. He demands a mic and the timekeeper complies.

CALLIS – “Hello Nashville, are we ready for another Don Callis masterpiece that is Total Nonstop Action? (Callis’ question is met with a barrage of jeers). That’s what I thought. Anyway, before the show gets under way, I’ve got some business that needs taking care of. West, get your ass up here.”

Don West looks slightly confuzzled, but he does as he told.

CALLIS – “Look Don, I know you’re a busy beaver, commentating on my show, but I have something I’d like to ask you about. Roll the footage boys.”

On the TNATron appears some footage of last weeks 6-man main event, and we can hear the commentary in the background. West, in the heat of the moment makes some comment about Callis being a no good sumbitch, or something along the lines. The footage ends and Callis turns back to West.

CALLIS – “Now Don, I’m a patient man, but frankly, your commentary is not crucial to the programme and I won’t stand for such impertinence from such a replaceable cog in the TNA machine. So Don, YOU’RE FIRED! Haha, go on Don, you’re no longer a TNA employee. Brendon, Kev, see that Mr West is removed from the building.”

Gage and Northcutt grabs West by the arms, but he shrugs them off and leaves the ring of his own accord. They follow him, making sure that he does indeed leave the building.

CALLIS – “Unfortunately, this leaves us in a bit of a mess for this weeks show, as we have no one to partner Mr Tenay, so I have decided that the man who will temporarily step in is ME!”

Callis drops the mic and takes his seat at ringside. Tenay looks thrilled.

82%

Don Callis gained overness.

1. Third Time’s A Charm

Callis familiarises himself with his surroundings. Tenay offers him some words of wisdom, but Callis responds with a ‘I’ve done this before, Mike’. Tenay doesn’t look to impressed with his new broadcast colleague, but Callis is oblivious to this. He sits back and is straight into the role, running through the card, cutting jokes, the whole shebang. The appearance of AJ Styles on the rampway dampens things though.

Styles makes his way to the ring in his street clothes. Take note Glen, that is how to look badass in non-wrestling gear. He walks up the steps and inside the squared circle, then catches the mic which flies towards him.

STYLES – “Don, since we’re sharing a bit of footage this week, why don’t you take a look at the big screen.”

Styles turns towards the video and onto our screen comes footage with the caption ‘2 Weeks Ago’ and shows AJ Styles locking in the Texas Cloverleaf on Jeff Jarrett and eventually him tapping out. Next up is another piece of captioned video, and this one reads ‘Last Week’. It shows Jarrett going for a Figure Four, but Styles reversing into an inside cradle for a three count.

STYLES – “Now that’s some interesting footage, don’t you think Don? That’s two weeks in a row that I’ve beaten your boy Jarrett. Now a few weeks back you said that I wasn’t good enough to face the champ. Well what do you think now? I’ve pinned him, I’ve made him tap. So I’m asking, no wait, I’m demanding I got my title shot tonight.”

Callis gets up from his commentary position with a mic.

CALLIS – “Well I’m sorry to burst your bubble AJ, but the champ isn’t scheduled to compete tonight, so you won’t be getting you shot tonight, but thanks anyway, maybe one day down the line, but not tonight.”

STYLES – “You see I thought you’d say something like that, so I got this. (Styles pulls out a bit of paper). This piece of paper here is from the powers that be and it states that the NWA World Title must be defended every 30 days or the champion shall be stripped. Now I know it’s been more than a month since his last defence, so failure to defend tonight will lead to him losing his title. So Don, what about my title shot tonight?”

Callis looks flustered by Styles’ threat. He stutters then composes himself before responding.

CALLIS – “Well AJ, I guess he will be competing tonight, but it won’t be against you. You’ve had your chances and you haven’t put asses in seats. However, I’ve got an adequate replacement. He’s one of TNAs up and coming stars, and his name is CM Punk. That’s right, it’ll be CM Punk versus Jeff Jarrett tonight for the NWA World Title. Oh, but don’t look down Styles, I’m a fair man and I’ll give you a chance to prove your worth, so next week you’ll face Abyss. But it won’t be a normal match, oh no, next week you’ll face Abyss in a STEEL CAGE MATCH!”

Callis chuckles to himself then sits back down at the commentary table. Styles eventually leaves the ring and walks to the back.

83%

2. Victims #5 and #6

We come back from the short recap of tonight’s events, mainly the signing of tonight’s main event. Already in the ring are Eric Young and Jonny Storm. Through the arena blares some dark, archaic music signals the arrival of the soultaker, Gacy, as always accompanied to ringside by Father Mitchell. Apparently it was Mitchell who requested this handicap match. Gacy steps over the top rope, and the bells rings. Storm and Young look at each other then charge towards the monster, but he catches them both around the throat. He throws them both into the corner, showing his massive strength. Young is the first man up, but he’s locked in an arm wringer then a short arm clothesline. Storm tries to attack by jumping on Gacy’s back, but he gets caught. The behemoth pulls Storm over his shoulder and drives him to the mat with a big Fire Thundah Driver. Gacy goes for the cover, but Young interrupts. He pounds away at the back of Gacy, but the big man doesn’t even flinch. Gacy slowly turns around and gives Young a sadistic smirk. He kicks Young in the stomach, then powerbombs him to the mat! Gacy bounces back against the ropes and delivers a big splash for the 1-2-3.

Gacy bt Jonny Storm and Eric Young (54/35/73) *

Jonny Storm lost overness

3. Once Upon A Video Dreary

After the match, Gacy and Mitchell are about to leave the ring, when the lights begin flicking spookily, then a figure appears on the video screen. It’s Raven!

RAVEN – “Gacy, Mitchell, your time draws ever closer. The time for repent is now, for soon your judgement day will arrive. James, you and I have a lot of history together, some good, some bad, but when this day arrives all shall be forgotten, for one man will stand tall and the other, the other shall begin his new live in the depths of the lost. Keyser Soze said the greatest trick that the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didnt exist. Well James, I exist and I'm going to be your own personal demon because this savior has already been crucified for your sins, crucified for the sins of my humanity, crucified for the sins of my compassion, crucified for the sins of my past, by the flesh of my flesh, and the blood of my blood. The day of reckoning is upon us. Soon the final battle will be fought and the war will be won, and after the smoke clears, I shall stand defiant. Quote the Raven, nevermore.”

Raven takes his characteristic pose then the screen fades into darkness. The camera focuses in on Mitchell, who stares at the screen, then signals for Gacy to leave the ringside area, following him up the ramp.

82%

4. Triple Chance X Invitational Finals

The first real contest of the evening rolls around and it’s the conclusion of Michael Shane’s Triple Chance X Invitational. The ‘new Franchise’ Michael Shane is first down lead down to the ring by the ex-Franchisor, Shane Douglas. Did I say that right? Shane holds the ropes open for Shane to step through, and Shane obliges. I could continue the double Shane theme, but I won’t because I’m not that much of a bastard. Next out is X, and we still don’t know who it is under the mask. There has been much speculation X’s identity, including many internet sources claiming it is TAFKA Pierre, but I don’t know about that. The final man out is Chris Sabin. He charges down to the ring and the triple threat begins. Tenay reminds the fans that the match will be fought to one fall, and therefore the champ does not have to be pinned. The three go back and forth. X hit a nice double flipping dropkick, sending both opponents to the outside, which lead to the inevitable suicide dives. Sabin got a nearfall back inside the ring after a victory roll, but Shane broke up the count. Shane had X set up on the top rope for a superplex, but Sabin ran up the ropes and sunset flip powerbombed Shane in what has become a trademark TNA spot. After more high-risk offence trading, Sabin takes control. He throws X to the outside and goes to work on his nemesis Michael Shane. He whips Shane into the ropes and nails a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. He makes the cover, but only gets a 2. Sabin ascends the turnbuckle. He steadies himself, but gets crotched by X. X climbs up top with him, and positions himself behind Sabin. Spinning hurricanrana! He hooks the leg of Sabin. 1-2-no, Shane interrupts. Shane goes for a sluggish clothesline, but X ducks under and rolls Shane up! 1…2…Douglas pulls the referee out of the ring! Douglas looks pleased with himself on the outside of the ring, but turns round straight into a flipping plancha from X. Sabin eventually gets to his feet, but he’s dazed. He turns round straight into a superkick, no, he ducks and nails a superkick of his own on Shane. Sabin makes the cover. 1…2…Douglas pulls Sabin out of the ring this time. As Douglas and Sabin fight on the outside, X is climbing to the top turnbuckle. He stands atop and pulls his mask off. IT’S PAUL LONDON! London gets his balance then flies. Shooting Star Press! He connects and the ref counts! 1…2…3! Paul London has won the X-Division title! He is handed the belt and holds it triumphantly as the TNA fans cheer.

X (Paul London) bt Michael Shane and Chris Sabin to win the X-Division title (64/50/79) **

The X-Division title has gained image.

5. America’s Most Wanted Top Of The Hitlist

I’ve run out of clever introductions for this segment, so here it is, no gimmicks, it’s B-Jizzle Intervizzle. BG James is already in the ring awaiting the arrival of his guests for tonight, and he is not disappointed when Da Hit Squad walk through the curtain. Still relative unknowns in TNA, they made a huge impact last week, attacking the tag champs, America’s Most Wanted.

JAMES – “Well it looks like my guests have arrived. Mack, Mafia, it’s good to see you here tonight. Now my first question, why did you attack America’s Most Wanted last week?”

MAFIA – “Why did we attack them? You wanna know why? Because we can! We are the baddest muthas on the planet and we do what we like, when we like, got a problem with that?”

JAMES – “Err no, not really, but why America’s Most Wanted? Why not AJ Styles or Jeff Jarrett, or even BG James?”

MACK – “Because they have something we want – the tag team titles. We have come to TNA to show the nation that Da Hit Squad are the baddest men on planet. We don’t take shit from anyone, especially not you, boy!”

JAMES – “Now hold up there second, boy, I don’t care whether you are the baddest man on the planet or the fruitiest fairy at the club, nobody talks to BG James like that on his show, so I suggest you…”

Mafia snatches the mic away.

MAFIA – “And I suggest you shut up before we shut you up. Now all this is talk is cheap, lets do this like men. Next week we have a match, then we’ll see how tought you really are.”

JAMES – “Oh, it’s on like Agent Orange in Saigon!”

The 3 men exchange a staredown then leave.

61%

Mafia gained overness.

6. Who Will It Be?

The time comes for the most anticipated match in my TNAs short history. Yes fans, it’s time for Shark Boy versus Sonjay Dutt in a match with the highest of stakes; the winner will take his place in the Live Kru, and the loser will have nothing. Shark Boy and Sonjay Dutt come out to an equally rousing reception. The crowd has shown no favouritism towards either athlete. I think they’ll be happy whoever gets the place. As this is a match of epic proportions I’ll go a bit old skool and type it out PBP from about halfway. And we join the match already in progress. Sonjay and SB get back to their feet. SB swings, but Dutt ducks and looks to be going for a back suplex, but SB flips backwards over his head. Waistlock by SB. German suplex! SB holds on for the cover but only gets a two count. SB pulls Dutt back to his feet. He whips Dutt into the ropes but Dutt manages to reverse an attack into a flying headscissors, not wait, he’s turned it into a swinging DDT! What an awesome move by Dutt! He kips up to his feet and steps through the ropes. He waits for Shark Boy to get to his feet then springboards onto the top rope. He goes for a hurricanrana, but SB catches him. Sitout powerbomb by SB! He holds on, but Dutt kicks out at 2 and a half. SB gets up and applies a rear chinlock. He wrenches back but Sonjay gets fights back up to his feet. Dutt rolls around into a front headlock, then flips him over with a Northern Lights suplex. Sonjay decides not to hold on for the pin, but rolls back, pulling SB back to a vertical base. He lifts SB into the air and forces him onto the top rope. Sonjay climbs up with him. Sonjay pauses and SB capitalises, winding him. SB takes the advantage, and seems to be manoeuvring him on the top rope. Top rope Michinoku Driver!! SB makes the cover. 1…2…threNO, Sonjay managed to kick out. How the hell did he do that?! A ‘holy Shark’ chant breaks out through the arena, and it looks like SB has decided for a different approach for this match. He lifts Sonjay to his feet and applies a move with looks like a modified Tazmission. He’s trying to wear Sonjay down then finish him off. SB pulls tighter and tighter as Sonjay squirms in an attempt to escape. He can’t get out of the hold, and in a last ditch attempt he pulls SB towards the corner and kicks off the middle rope, flipping over. He’s turned it into a pinning predicament! SB can’t break the hold! Wait, the refs counting Sonjay’s shoulders down too! Neither man can break the pin! 1…2…3! The winner and new member of the Live Kru is no one? The two competitors stand confused in the ring. James and Killings comes down the ramp from the back and get into the ring.

JAMES – “Wow guys, you really fought a tough match, but unfortunately there can only be one winner, and that man is…”

Killings stops James and the two confer.

JAMES – “The newest member of the Live Kru is…”

James stops again and confers with Killings once more.

JAMES – “Ahh screw this shizzle, the newest members of the Live Kru are Shark Boy AND Sonjay Dutt! Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce to you NWA:TNA’s premiere stable, the FOUR LIVE KRU!!”

The crowd give the two men a standing ovation as all four stand in the ring and raise their arms.

Shark Boy drew with Sonjay Dutt (63/47/79) **

7. Meanwhile Backstage…

As we come back from the short advert for TNA’s top sponsor Nintendo. Maybe they are planning a game release. I’d mark for a TNA N64 game. Anyway, Tenay tells us that during the break there was some commotion backstage, but luckily our cameras got some footage of the incident.

We hear some loud noises then the cameraman charges towards the locker room. The door flies open and we see Sonny Siaki and David Young beating down Danny Doring. He is on the floor, clutching his ribs as Young and Siaki stomp away. Eventually a horde of officials enter the room and break up the ruckus. Siaki yells ‘that’ll teach you to mess with me, punk’ as he is dragged away. The camera zooms in on the fallen Doring and then cuts back to ringside.

57%

David Young gained overness.

8. He Get’s By With A Little Help From His Friends

Our show reaches it’s climax with a match made earlier tonight, which will see Jeff Jarrett defend his title against CM Punk. It’s great to see them giving Punk the ball, even if this may only be a one off match, it’s still a sign of the faith they have in him. He could probably use a title run, but TNA don’t seem to have one for him to win. Speaking of titles, there has been talk of TNA bringing in a hardcore title as something for the midcard to compete over. I wonder what the fans would think of that. Anyway, on to the match, which is dominated by Jarrett. He uses his experience and wily cunning to beat down the fan favourite, who gets a lot of underdog support. But Jarrett gets a little too cocky and lets his guard down. He comes off the top straight into a boot from Punk. Clothesline to the groggy Jarrett. Punk bounces off the ropes and nails a big spinning wheel kick. Punk gives Jarrett a Japanese armdrag then an underhook suplex. Punk kicks him in the gut and steps him up for a Pepsi Plunge, but Jarrett gives Punk a low blow. He goes for the Stroke, but Punk blocks with some elbows and sends him into the ropes. Underhook backbreaker to Jarrett. Callis has seen enough and steps up, waving towards the back. Sure enough out come Gage and Northcutt. They jump up on the apron, but get knocked down by Punk. Callis himself gets on the apron, only to be knocked down. Punk turns around but it’s straight into a Stroke. Jarrett makes the cover and gets the tainted win. After the match, the goons, Callis and Jarrett all start putting the boots to Punk. The crowd are unanimous in their disapproval, but hope appears in the form of AJ Styles charging to the ring. He slides in, but is met by the heels and his resistance is soon thwarted. The heels start celebrating their victory when suddenly another figure appears on the stage. IT’S RAVEN! Raven is met on the ramp by Gage and Northcutt, but he fights them off, sending them to ground. He jumps back inside the ring where he’s met by Jarrett. They exchange punches and then Jarrett goes to irish whip Raven, but he reverses, pulls Jarrett in and gives him an Evenflow DDT! Jarrett rolls to the outside and is helped to the back by Callis and the goons, whilst Raven stands defiant.

Jeff Jarrett bt CM Punk (78/73/83) ***

The NWA World Title gained image.

-End Show-

CQ - 68%

PPV - 0.20

3-12-03

Attendance - 3621

1. Hail Sabin!

Tonights show kicks off with the B-Boy and Chris Sabin battling it out for a shot at the X-Division crown. The crowd gets behind Sabin straight away, and unfortunately there are very few B-Boy marks in the crowd. Luckily I’m one of them, and I’m routing for him. Unfortunately they’ve cut the lyrics from Real Muthafuckin’ G, but what can you do. B-Boy begins well with some trademark hard hitting offence, but the tides turn when he goes for a dropkick into the corner, but Sabin moves, sending B-Boy to the outside. Sabin nails the vaulting bodypress, then takes the fight to the inside. He starts using some fast paced offence to keep his opponent downed. Eventually he takes the victory with the Future Shock. After the match, Sabin jumps up on the corner to salute his fans, who continue to hail him. Suddenly, Michael Shane comes charging down the ramp. He waits for Sabin to turn around, then nails a huge Superkick, flooring the victor. Sabin will have a chance for revenge when he takes part in the triple threat match next week.

Chris Sabin bt B-Boy (59/45/88) **3/4

2. Gilbertti’s At Last Chance Saloon

Backstage, we see down on his luck Disco Gilbertti walking through some corridors backstage, before he turns a corner and we find out his desired destination. He walks through a door labelled ‘Don Callis’ and the camera follows. We find Don Callis sitting at a desk, either side of him are his goons, Northcutt and Gage.

CALLIS – “What can I do for you Glen?”

DISCO – “Well…”

CALLIS – “Hold on Glen (Callis starts talking on the phone.) Yeah I think we do some great business together. Tell you what, come along next week and we’ll discuss. Alright then, bye. (Callis hangs up). So what can I do for you Glen?”

DISCO – “Well, I just wanted a match tonight really. What you think?”

CALLIS – “Ok, why not, we’ve got some airtime to kill, who do you wanna face?”

DISCO – “Well how about a title shot?”

CALLIS – “Woah woah, easy Glen. I’m sorry but you’re just not up to that level yet.”

DISCO – “Well how about I replace Chris Daniels in the main event, I think I’m ready for that.”

CALLIS – “Did you see the main event last week Glen. Daniels was off the charts. There’s no way I’m taking him out. I’ll tell you what, you can have a match with CM Punk. If you win that then we’ll talk about something a bit more high profile. Ok?”

DISCO – “Thanks Don, you won’t regret this.”

Gilbertti leaves the room and pulls the door up behind him. He waits for it to close then says to himself ‘Yes! Glen Gilbertti’s back in the game”. The camera fades out to a short advert for TNAs DVDs.

77%

-ADVERT BREAK-

3. Gilbertti Gets A Taste Of The Pepsi Plunge

We come back to ringside to find CM Punk already in the ring, awaiting his opponent. Sure enough, Disco Gilbertti dances his way down to ringside, looking fairly confident about his upcoming bout. He must’ve not had enough time to get ready for the match, because he’s out here in his street clothes. Normally that would make a wrestler look badass, but oh no, this is Glen Gilbertti. He’s gone for the Randy Orton look, but with a leopard print shirt. The crowd taunt him with a ‘who wears that shit?’ chant, but he’s obviously too cool to hear. Finally he gets in the ring and starts the match. Gilbertti maintains some degree of control for the first minute or so, even working away at the arm of Punk, but he gets cocky and loses his grip on the match. Punk whips him into the ropes and levels him with a spinning forearm. Kick to the gut of Gilbertti. Double underhook backbreaker. Punk stalks his fallen opponent, who is clutching the small of his back. Gilbertti gets to his feet, only to be pulled between Punk’s legs. Pepsi Plunge! Punk makes the cover and that’s all she wrote. If you think the match report sounds a bit short, that’s exactly how long it was. Disco Gilbertti got the squash kicked out of him.

CM Punk bt Glen Gilbertti (64/64/80) **1/2

CM Punk gained overness. Glen Gilbertti lost overness.

4. That’s A Large Pepperoni With A Side Of Spiritual Advice

After the laughter ends, the live show feed goes backstage. We find Sonny Siaki over by the water cooler, quenching his thirst, but it seems he has a hankering for more than just a cool beverage as Christopher Daniels walks by.

SIAKI – “Hey Chris, you got a minute?”

DANIELS – “Sure Sonny. What can I do for you?”

SIAKI – “Well I need some wise words, and Russo told me you were the best man to see, so you got any for me?”

DANIELS – “Ahh Sonny, don’t worry my friend, the good times aren’t far away, maybe all you need is a new edge. The answers are right in front of your face. Just open your eyes, and the path will become clear."

SIAKI – “..a new edge, thanks Chris.”

Sonny turns his attention back to the water cooler as Daniels walks off, with a rye smile on his face.

74%

5. Mr. Xuberant, Xtravagant, Xtrodinary, Xciting, X-a-lotta

The crowd seems expectant and the show rolls round to its second X-Division bout of the evening. First man out is Alex Shelley who draws a bit of heat from the crowd, but not to much. How do you expect someone to get heat if the crowd don’t even know they’re supposed to be a heel? Next out is his opponent, X. No one really knows much about him. Why am I calling X as a male? It could be a girl, we don’t know yet. So it comes to the ring and the match begins. Unfortunately it doesn’t live up to the hype of previous X-Division encounter as the two just didn’t seem to gel. Unfortunately Shelley uncharacteristically botched a couple of spots, including slipping when he went for an Asai moonsault, which turned the crowd against him. Not the sort of heat they want him to be getting. X whipped Shelley into the ropes. Shelley leapfrogged and bounced against the opposite side. He went for a Thesz press, but X caught him. It ran Shelley into the corner and placed him on the top rope. It stepped onto the apron and climbed to the top rope. Spinning hurricanrana! X makes the cover and picks up the victory. Unsatisfying overall. Hopefully the final will be better.

X bt Alex Shelley (45/38/64) 1/2*

6. And The Newest Member of the Live Kru Is…

The crowd, still fairly subdued after the mediocre match that went before it. Don’t get me wrong, Shelley’s got amazing potential, but I think he needs a solid gimmick and maybe a slight in ring improvement if he’s going to make it in TNA. Anyway, the crwod erupts with anticipation as it’s B-Jizzle Intervizzle timizzle. This is fast becoming the only reason people actually watch TNA. I’ve heard reports round the net about fans just buying and tuning in for BJI then turning off. Ah well, whatever pays the piper. There is added excitement tonight as we will find out who the newest member of the Live Kru will be. Keep your fingers crossed Abyss.

Out to the ring comes BG James, and he is joined by Ron Killings. They walk down the ramp and takes their seats in the usual Intervizzle set. BG gets on the stick.

JAMES – “Naaasssshhhvvviiillllleeee are you ready for another B-Jizzle Intervizzzzzzlle?”

The crowd pop huge.

JAMES – “Yeah that’s what I thought. And this week is a very special Intervizzle because this week we will reveal the newest member of the Live Kru. Over the last few weeks we’ve had hundreds and hundreds of applicants, all hoping to be the next L-Ker; some good, some, some not so good. So, without further ado, let me introduce to you the newest member of the Live Kru, drum roll please (Killings starts banging the arms of his chair), the third member of the Live Kru…SHARK BOY!!”

The crowd cheer as Shark Boy comes running through the curtain and down to the ring. He slingshots into the squared circle where he and BG embrace. James raises Shark Boy’s arm in the air, but the chant of ‘Holy Shark’ is broken up by Killings halting the celebrations.

KILLINGS – “Hold up there, BG. Now I don’t mean to spoil the party, but he aint the newest member of the Live Kru. The newest member of the Live Kru is…SONJAY DUTT!!”

Sonjay Dutt dances across the stage then sprints down the ring. He slides in Billy Gunn style and high fives Killings. This time it’s BG’s turn to interrupt.

JAMES – “Woah, woah, woah, I don’t know what where gunna do here. I mean both of you can’t me in the Kru.”

Sonjay and Shark Boy look confused. James suddenly has a thought, and no, it didn’t hurt.

JAMES – “All righty then, I got me an idea of how we’re gunna do this. This time next week, we’re going to have a match. It’s going to be Shark Boy versus Sonjay Dutt, and the winner will be the newest member of the Live Kru. What you think?”

He points the microphone to the crowd who give the announcement a big cheer.

All four men raise their hands in the ring, with the question still remaining, who will join the Live Kru?

70%

Sonjay Dutt gained overness.

7. Not Natural Enough

After a short, well earned absence from TNA, America’s Most Wanted made their return facing the Naturals for the tag straps. Low and behold they did not disappoint. They are the hottest thing on the independent scene at the moment, drawing praise from much of the internet media. Lets just hope one of them doesn’t decide he’s too big for TNA and runs off to join the midcard hell at Vinny Mac Wrestling. The Naturals are lead out to the ring by their apparently new manager Vince Russo, although they don’t seem to care about his presence much. The match kicks off with Douglas and Storm. It doesn’t take long before AMW control the run of play, using their superior experience to work away at Stevens. He gives him a double spinebuster then Harris goes to the top rope. Flying elbowdrop! He makes the cover. Douglas tries to interfere but Storm cuts him off. AMW get the win. AMW hold there belts above their heads triumphantly, celebrating their first successful defence. What’s that? Two fans seemed to have jumped the guardrail and are coming in the ring. Wait, they aren’t fans. Holy shit! That’s Mafia and Mack! Da Hit Squad is in TNA! Storm and Harris get nailed from behind. Sitout powerbomb to Storm! Mafia grabs Harris and plants him with an Exploder suplex! Da Hit Squad have left the champions floored. They’ve certainly made an impact here tonight.

America’s Most Wanted bt The Naturals (60/50/85) **1/2

The NWA Tag Titles gained image.

8. Bah Gawd, It’s A Six Man Slobberknocker!

A very chaotic show comes to an end with the 6-man tag match. Tonight we’ve seen the semi finals of Michael Shane’s Triple Chance X Invitational, the possible new members of the Live Kru and the debut of Da Hit Squad. The evening finishes off with a 6-man tag match, pitting Ron Killings, AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn against Chris Daniels, Simon Diamond and Jeff Jarrett. The match goes back and forth, partners rotating giving each member an equal chance to wow the crowd. Jerry Lynn was characteristically on form tonight, showing that he’s still got what it takes to excite the fans, particularly with a flying DDT. If he keeps this up, he might earn himself a world title shot. The match, like most TNA main events, descends into anarchy. Diamond and Lynn start pummelling each other, moving slowly up the ramp whilst Daniels and Killings battle through the crowd. This leaves Styles and Jarrett going back at it in the ring. After a characteristic ref bump, Jarrett suplexes Styles down and goes outside for a chair. He slides it back into the ring, but as he crawls back inside, Styles legdrops him face first into it. Styles makes the cover, but the ref is still down. He holds on for an imaginery three then realises the count isn’t coming. He turns his attention to the fallen official, trying to revive him. He turns around straight into a chairshot! Jarrett smiles sadistically then drops the chair. He pulls the referee over, magically waking him then makes the cover. 1…2…kickout! Jarrett can’t believe it. He shouts at the ref before grabbing Styles by the leg. He tries to lock in the Figure Four, but Styles gets the inside cradle! He holds on and the ref makes the count! 1…2…3!! Styles has pinned Jarrett again.

Styles, Lynn and Killings bt Diamond, Jarrett and Daniels (72/76/86) ***1/4

-End Show-

CQ - 65%

PPV - 0.22

26-11-03

Attendance - 3627

0. Victim #4

TNA opens up this week with a grudge match you can always go to for a good solid open. At the moment the ongoing feud is seriously lacking direction, but with the addition of Gacy hopefully it will end solidly. Anyway, the opener is CM Punk and Julio Dinero taking on Sinn and Slash. Word in the back is that the fans are getting a bit sick of Punk’s bland gimmick. Hopefully this means that they’ll give him a chance to run as a singles competitor with the Straightedge gimmick. I use gimmick in the loosest sense, because as everyone knows, Punk is the real deal. After a period of dominance by the Dark Church (Dark > New), CM Punk takes back the advantage for his team and eventually finished the match by giving Sinn the Pepsi Plunge. After the match, Father James leads Gacy down to the ring. Punk stands tall in the ring as Gacy steps over the top rope. Gacy goes straight for Punk, but he ducks under the attack. Dropkick to Gacy, which sends him back into the ropes. Punk chances fate and goes for the jugular, whipping Gacy across the ring. He springboards off the middle rope, spinning in midair and clocking Gacy in the face with a HUGE forearm. Gacy gets knocked to the mat! Punk goes to the top rope as the giant begins to stir. He tries a moonsault, but Gacy catches him. He lifts Punk onto his shoulders, then drops down to his knees, driving his massive shoulders into Punk’s midsection. Gacy is about to continue his assault when the lights begin to flicker and suddenly Raven appears on the TNATron.

RAVEN – “Your time is coming, Mitchell. Time is drawing closer to the end. Not long now. Soon the final battle shall be fought and the war will be won, then I shall set my flock free. Quote the Raven, nevermore."

CM Punk and Julio Dinero bt Slash and Sinn (59/44/75) *1/2

---

We cut backstage for another broadcast from 2LK central and another round of interviews.

KILLINGS – “Next!”

The man who enters the room is none other than the Original Playa from the Himalayas, Sonjay Dutt.

JAMES – “Well this is slightly more interesting. So Sonjay, why do you think you would fit in well with the Truth and myself.”

DUTT – “Because I am everything you guys are lookin’ for. I have the skills, the looks and the charisma, what more could you want?”

JAMES – “Well you’re certainly right about that. Alright then Sonjay, you got any moves?”

DUTT – “Have I got any moves? I’m Sonjay Dutt, the original Playa from the Himalayas, of course I’ve got moves.”

Sonjay clears some room then gives the Kru some classic move busting. If you’re a CZW fan you know what I’m talking about.

KILLINGS – “Well I’m impressed. We’ll be in touch Sonjay.”

The two Kru members look at each other and smile as we go back to the ring.

1. Simon’s Got A Problem

Simon Diamond comes out for what the fans expect to be his announced match with Frankie Kazarian, but instead he snatches a mic from our ring announcer and slides under the bottom rope. Diamond is strangely not accompanied by Johnny Swinger, which could possibly signal a singles push for the former tag specialist. He stands tall in the centre of the ring, and we all know what’s coming next.

DIAMOND - “Simon’s got a problem!”

Diamond pauses before his impending rant, looking down his nose at the Nashville regulars, arrogantly.

DIAMOND - “Simon’s problem is with you, Jerry Lynn.”

This remark brings a mass chorus of boos from the TNA crowd, as he is one of the original TNA superstars.

DIAMOND – “Simon does care what you people. You are not on my level. I could go into why I am above you, but tonights about Simon, not you. So Jerry, I guess you’re wondering why I attacked you after your match last week. Well the answer is simple; I hate you! You have tormented me since the first day we met, ever since back in the days of good ‘ole E-C-Dubya, and I’m insulted by it Jerry. You know why? Because you don’t even give a damn. You don’t give a damn about you held me down. You spent your career doing the J-O-B. Everyone would rant and rave about how you were never given a chance; how you were just stuck under a mask and called Mr JL. You know what Jerry? I don’t give a shit. The truth is you deserved nothing. You are a washed up never-was. Those shots should’ve been mine. I could’ve taken that TV belt, but no, you had to have the shot. You knew that I would show you up. You knew I would succeed where you had so often failed, but you refused to accept it. Time and again you would beg Paul for ‘one more shot’ when everyone knew it should’ve been mine. Everyone knows if you’d stepped aside Simon Diamond would’ve saved ECW, but what’s done is done. Then your big break came Jerry. Vinnie Mac called you up and you got to the Promised Land: the WWF, and once again, you fucked up. You wasted your one shot at the big time. That should’ve been my chance, Jerry. If you’d stepped aside Simon would be in the WWE right now, but instead I’m stuck in this God-forsaken place; the place where the mediocre go to die!”

Simon throws the mic out of the ring, derobes and beckons for his opponent to make his way to the ring.

79%

Simon gained overness.

2. Simon Says ‘I Win’

Diamond does not have long to wait as the ‘Socal Sensation’ Frankie Kazarian makes his way to ringside, and he wastes no time, going straight for Simon. Eventually Diamond takes back the control, and insists on schooling the rookie with a variety of humiliating mat holds. Frankie eventually spins up from a waistlock into a sitting position, then rolls under Simon’s grasp into a hammerlock. He proceeds to embarrass Diamond, spinning over his body, slapping him around the head. The crowd is delighted at Kazarian’s antics, but Diamond seems less pleased. You can see the anger in his eyes as he goes back to work on Kazarian. Diamond seems to be trying to break the youngster in half with some savage blow and stretches. Close to the 9 minute mark, Diamond falls down the back of a suplex, spins Frankie round and kicks him in the gut. Cradle piledriver?! Diamond makes the cover and picks up the victory. I guess Diamond is really trying to get under Lynn’s skin.

Simon Diamond bt Frankie Kazarian (67/53/82) **1/4

-Advert for TNA Live-

3. The New Franchise Offers A Triple Chance

Lollipop is backstage with Michael Shane. Looks like we’re about to hear about his cunning plan to determine the next contender to his X-Division title. Strangely, the ‘New Franchise’ is alone, with Shane Douglas no where to be seen. Ah well, who honestly cares?

LOLLIPOP – “Michael, since last week’s show there has been much talk about the next challenger to the X-Division crown, with many feeling that Chris Sabin should once again get his shot. Now rumour has it that you have come up a plan to decide the number one contender. Would you care to tell us more?"

SHANE – “Yes Lollipop, I will, but first let me talk about Chris Sabin. I have heard so much talk about him over the past few weeks, and I’ve gotta ask why? He’s a loser, a nobody. Why isn’t Michael Shane on everyone’s lips? I mean I’m champion of the X-Division, the most sort after title in wrestling today, not to mention the ‘new Franchise’. You people should be praising me, not hailing Sabin. So onto my plan – the Triple Chance X Invitational. I have invited five of the world’s top wrestlers, and Chris Sabin, to compete for a shot at my title. This week those six men will compete in a battle royal. The first two men eliminated will be out of the tourney, with the final four competing in singles matches next week for a shot at the gold the following week in a triple threat match."

LOLLIPOP – “Wow Michael that sounds great, just one thing though, surely it’s a double chance since you only get two chances, not three.”

SHANE – “No, it’s a triple chance, you see…(he starts counting on his fingers), shut up!”

Shane leaves the interview area after being seemingly outwitted by Lollipop.

61%

4. X Marks The Spot

The first stage of Shane’s Triple Chance X Invitational begins with a battle royal. The participants are revealed in traditional style. First out to the ring is Sonjay Dutt. He is joined soon after by indy up and comer Alex Shelley. The two locks up and exchange various entertaining moves before Juventud Guerrera makes his return to TNA. Juvi tries to take advantage of his slightly fatigued opponents, but it doesn't work very well. In fact, the Juice is out of gas within a minute which allows an easy elimination for Shelley. Sonjay nails a beautiful flying headscissors before Chris Sabin makes his way to the ring. This brings some nice spots from the three, especially a double backdrop driver by Shelley. The fifth man out to the ring is B-Boy, making his first appearance in TNA. The management is apparently very high on the potential of B-Boy. Look for him to make a few more appearances in the future. He makes an impact straight away, eliminating Sonjay Dutt after a torture-rack neckbreaker combo. B-Boy and Shelley ganged up on Sabin, trying to force him over the top rope, but Sabin refused to lose and slipped back under the bottom rope. Eventually the final participant made his way to the ring. No one really knew who he was, it was just a guy in tight shorts and a mask with the letter 'X' on it. He came in and gave Shelley a smooth hurricanrana. X got straight back up and gave Sabin and B-Boy and double flipping dropkick. Shelley is launched over to top rope by X. He celebrates the elimination, but before long B-Boy attacks. He whips X into the ropes and swings with the clothesline, but X ducks. He comes springboards off the ropes and nails B-Boy with a back elbow. B-Boy is dazed and X quickly disposes of him over the top rope. It's down to X and Sabin. Right hand by Sabin. He goes for a Northern Lights suplex, but X blocks. The two exchange a variety of reversals, before X finds himself behind Sabin. He lifts him up for an atomic drop and dumps him over the top rope SNES style. X has won the first round of the Triple Chance X Invitational.

X won the Battle Royal (X, Sabin, B-Boy and Shelley advance) 59/45/73 *1/4

---

We go back to 2LK HQ to find James and Killings in the chairs, awaiting the next applicant. Strangely, in walks Glen Gilbertti.

JAMES – “*Sigh* What do you want Gilbertti?”

DISCO – “I’m here to try out for your group.”

KILLINGS – “Look Glen, you’re just not 3LK material. You erm well you, what’s the word I’m looking for?”

JAMES – “Suck.”

KILLINGS – “Yep. You suck.”

DISCO – “Oh come on, look, I’ll show you my moves.”

JAMES – “No no Glen, I’ve seen them, and frankly a no legged midget busts better moves than you. Now, out!”

Gilbertti goes to leave, but turns back. James just points towards the door as Gilbertti hangs his head and leaves.

5. The Return of Ki

We come back from the short advertisement and it’s Intervizzle time. It wasn’t a real advertisement, just a promo for Macho Man’s upcoming single ‘Be A Man’. Now normally we wouldn’t plug something so lacking in goodness, however he made us a deal we couldn’t refuse – if we promoted the CD then he promised to never, ever appear on TNA. Anyway, the ratings are rescued by the appearance of B-Jizzle, BG James.

JAMES – “Well hello once again, yes folks you know what time it is, so lets get crackalakin’ with B-Jizzle Intervizzle. This weeks guest is making his return to TNA after a pretty long absense. Please welcome the man who kicks so hard the Karate Kid crapped his pants, LOW KI!”

Through the curtain comes the face of intensity that is Low Ki. The crowd greet him as if he were their long lost millionaire uncle, and a large pop can be heard through the arena. Ki makes his way into the ring where he is greeted by James, who quickly makes a kung fu stance before offering Ki a seat.

JAMES – “It’s nice to see you back Ki.”

KI – “It feels good to be back.”

JAMES – “Well Ki, I won’t bore you by discussin’ you injury, cos I’m sure you don’t wanna talk about that, so I’ll ask what does Low Ki aim to achieve now that he’s back in TNA?”

KI – “Well, I want the same as everyone – titles. Everyone knows that you can only measure success by what you achieve, and in this business that means winning matches, and further down the line, gold.”

JAMES – “Ok, good answer, but how do you think you will fair against the big boys of TNA. There are some tough nuts here, even some that B-Jizzle wouldn’t cross.”

KI – “It’s not the size of the fighter, but the size of the fight he brings. I am not intimidated by the opponents TNA has to offer. As they say, the bigger they are, the harder they fall.”

JAMES – “One more question Ki, how the hell do you do that rollie kickie thing. I’ve been tryin’ to add it to the B Jizzle arsenal, but I just can’t do it.”

Ki laughs and is about to continue when the lights dim. Suddenly on the screen appears a Dragon’s head. It opens it’s jaws and out comes fire, engulfing the screen. Then the image disappears and the lights go back to normal.

JAMES – “Well I don’t know what the hell that was, but I’m afraid that’s all we have time for this week. Next week’s guest will be the newest member of the 3 Live Kru. Who that’ll be, you’ll just have to tune in and find out.”

79%

Low Ki gained overness. James gained overness.

6. The Good Guys Always Get The Girl

After a slightly less hectic Intervizzle than last week, we come to the match to deal with last weeks aftermath. It sees Danny Doring taking on Sonny Siaki. The viewer are treated to a video flashback showing what went down last week as Sonny Siaki makes his way to the ring. Out next comes Danny Doring, accompanied by Trinity, which doesn’t seem to please Siaki. He jumps down to the outside and the match begins with a fistfight on the ramp. The two men battle inside and outside the majority of the match, until Siaki tries to take the advantage with a chair, but Trinity comes from behind and steals it from him. Siaki spins around and begins to chase Trinity around the ring. She slides into the ring hides behind the referee. This allows Doring to come behind and nails Siaki with a bulldog. Doring tries to make the cover, but the ref is too busy getting Trinity out the ring. Doring argues with the ref, which allows Siaki to recover. He rolls Doring up in a schoolboy, with a handful of tights! The ref can’t see it and makes the count. Siaki is quick to leave the ring as Doring gets up and yells at the ref, before Trinity calms him down.

Sonny Siaki bt Danny Doring (82/76/88) ***1/2

7. Russo Gets His Fresh Edge

Backstage, Vince Russo is sitting in a comfy looking chair, behind a tatty looking desk. He is reading some papers before there is a knock at the door and The Naturals, Chase Stevens and Andy Douglas.

DOUGLAS – "Alright Russo, what do you want? Word in the locker room is that you wanted to see us."

RUSSO – "Hey guys, glad you got the message. I have a very exciting proposition for you."

STEVENS – "What is it Russo, and don’t take too long, we’re busy people."

RUSSO – "Yeh ok, well I was thinking this past week about something I heard and I have decided that my organisation needs a fresh start, and I am offering you the opportunity to become the first members of Russo Inc."

STEVENS – "Not interested."

The two go to leave, but Russo quickly jumps out his chair and stops them.

RUSSO – "Ok er, how about if I get you guys a title shot next week against America’s Most Wanted, what do you say?"

DOUGLAS – "Alright Russo, you got yourself a deal, but we’d better get us that title shot next week."

RUSSO – !Don’t worry about it guys, just leave it to me. The shot is as good as yours.!

The camera fades out as we go back to ringside for the main event.

51%

Vince Russo lost overness. Andy Douglas gained overness. Chase Stevens gained overness.

8. Holy Shit! A Clean Main Event

Another grudge match here which comes after last week’s main event. It pits AJ Styles and Ron Killings against Christopher Daniels and NWA World champ Jeff Jarrett. A pretty good match all round, however Siaki/Doring really gave this one a run for it’s money. The heel team spent most of the match isolating Killings, mainly on neck-related offence. It’s good to see them giving Killings another run for the top instead of sticking with the classic midcard racist gimmick. I think they forgot he is a former world champ. Eventually, Killings battles back and low blows Jarrett. He crawls across the ring and makes the diving tag to Styles. AJ comes in like the proverbial house of fire, knocking down Jarrett then Daniels before he can get into the ring. He whips Double J across the ring and takes him down with a huge powerslam. AJ sees Daniels recovering on the outside and turns his attention thusly. He charges at the ropes and dives over with a somersault plancha. Styles gets back to his feet as the crowd pop in appreciation. Back inside Jarrett and Killings go at it. Jarrett goes for a back suplex, but The Truth counters it into a crossbody. He tries to cover but only gets a two. Styles comes back into the ring. They both whip JJ into the ropes and gives him a double backbody drop. Killings gets pulled out the ring by Daniels and they begin brawling around the ring. Back inside Jarrett and Styles exchange clubbing blows. Jarrett goes for another, but Styles ducks behind. German suplex! Styles rolls through back to a vertical base. He plants Jarrett with his ‘backdrop to facebuster’ combo. Styles instead of making the cover grabs Jarrett’s legs. He ties them up and rolls over, locking in a Texas Cloverleaf. Jarrett is screaming in the centre of the ring, unable to make it to the ropes. He tries to hold on, but can’t and is forced to tap out. Styles and Killing win the match.

Styles and Killings bt Jarrett and Daniels (82/81/84) ***1/4

-End Show-

CQ – 71%

PPV – 0.22

17-11-03

Attendance - 3905

0. Don’t Cross The Boss

The show opens with Don Callis coming down the ramp to the ring. Tenay and West highlight that this is probably due to last week when Styles and Lynn seemingly outsmarted him and teamed to beat the Red Skins, I mean Shirts. Now new fans to TNA may be expecting a WWEesque 20 minute promo. Don’t worry viewer, this is TNA. We don’t do 20 minute promos, and even if we did, Callis can actually cut them and keep people ENTERTAINED. You recognise that word Vince? It’s the one you stuck next to sports. I doubt many in Camp WWE use it anymore. Infact, your company name is irony at it’s base form. Well Callis is in the ring and ready to spew some literal glory, so lets have a butchers, shall we?

CALLIS – “I won’t waste my time out here, because frankly I hate you pathetic hicks as much as you dislike ‘readin’ them fancy non picture books’. Lynn, Styles, I hope you’re listening. Last week, you thought you’d outsmarted me. You thought by twisting my words that you got one up on me, but that was all part of my plan. I set that up so I could lure out the rats in the back. See in MY company you’re either with me, with the establishment, or you’re against me. I suspected there would be a few who would try and stand up and be heroes, but soon they’ll learn, they’ll learn my number one rule; don’t cross the boss! So what do we have in store for the two traitors tonight. [Callis looks down at his arm as if it’s a clipboard]. Well, tonight Jerry Lynn will take on Justin Credible. Not only that, but it’s going to be a No Disqualification match. And Mr Styles. You know that I’d love to stick you in a handicap match with a couple of giants and see you get dismantled, but I know that won’t draw. So tonight, Styles, you’ll be facing the Fallen Angel, Christopher Daniels. Have a good night fellas.”

Callis drops the mic and leaves with 2 of tonight’s matches set.

79%

Don Callis gained overness.

---

We cut backstage to find BG James and Ron Killings sitting at a table in their locker room. According to the sign they are ‘3LK Auditions’. Killings calls for the first applicant to enter. In comes some random white boy.

KILLINGS – "Hi there, can we help you?"

WHITEY – "Yeah, I’m here to apply for membership to 3LK."

KILLINGS – "Ok, well you see the deal with our group is that the 3 represent 3 ethnicities, 1 of each group, you know, like Noah’s Ark."

WHITEY – "So?"

KILLINGS – "Well problem is we already have a white guy – BG."

WHITEY – "I’m not white. I’m er Puerto Rican."

JAMES – "Puerto Rican? Dammit boy you aint no Puerto Rican, you’re whiter than an albino rabbit, now stop wastin’ our time and get out of our office."

The feed cuts back to ringside for the first match of the evening.

1. Another Soul Is Taken. Victim #2.

We come back from the short TNA Live promo video to find D’Lo Brown in the ring ready to kick off the show against the manster known only as Gacy. Sure enough we are not disappointed as Father James Mitchell makes his way through the curtain soon followed by Gacy. Mitchell leaves Gacy, taking his place on the outside of the ring as the behemoth steps over the top rope. D’Lo squares up to Gacy as the bell rings. The referee calls for a clean break, but as Gacy turns his back D’Lo attacks. D’Lo delivers some clubbing blows to the back of him, but Gacy does not flinch. He methodically turns around and tosses D’Lo by the throat into the corner. D’Lo comes back and goes for a dropkick, but it only staggers the big man. D’Lo bounces off the ropes and tried a big lariat, which knocks Gacy back into the ropes. D’Lo tries for the same again, but Gacy owns him with a HUGE clothesline off his own. Gacy runs up and gives Brown a big splash. D’Lo somehow makes it back to his feet after 400lbs crashing down on his ribs, but is quickly lifted up into a Fireman’s Carry by Gacy. He drops to his knees, crushing D’Lo’s ribs into Gacy’s massive shoulders. Gacy makes the cover – 1, 2, 3. Gacy picks up another win.

Gacy bt D’Lo Brown (58/52/64) ¾*

D’Lo Brown lost overness. Gacy gained overness.

2. Russo Has A Revelation

Christopher Daniels is getting ready in his locker room for his match later on in the night when in bursts Vince Russo.

RUSSO – "Hey Chris."

DANIELS – "Hey Vince, what can I do for you?"

RUSSO – "Well nothing really, I just wanted to thank you."

DANIELS – "For my advice? Think nothing of it…"

RUSSO – "Yeah, how did you…, anyway so right I was thinking about what you said and I bumped into Don Callis, and then it came to me, so I asked him if he’d give Ekmo and Legend a title shot and he said yeah. So well, I just came along to thank you and see if you had some more advice."

DANIELS – "Well Vince, perhaps you should consider broadening your alliances, adding a fresh edge to your organisation could bring good fortune."

RUSSO – "Really? Wow thanks Chris, and you know if ever I can do anything for you…"

DANIELS – "Think nothing of it Vince, just remember don’t over think, the answers are right in front of your face. Just open your eyes, and the path will become clear."

Russo walks off, looking satified as Daniels goes back to lacing his boots, with a rye smile appearing out of the corner of his mouth.

85%

Chris Daniels gained overness. Vince Russo gained overness.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

3. SWERVE~! Nah, Just Kidding. AMW Win Again.

As we heard in the previous segment, at the request of Vince Russo, Ekmo and Legend have been granted a tag team title shot against America’s Most Wanted. Maybe they didn’t want the shot, maybe they fancied another night off. I guess we’ll never know, because either way they’ve got the shot. Not a bad match surprisingly. Legend and Ekmo aren’t too bad, but they’re really absent of a look. Workers like Legend are a dime a dozen these days. Anyway, they give it their best shot, but we all know where the match is going. I won’t bore you with what happened, lets just say AMW nailed the Death Sentence on Ekmo. TNA seriously needs a real tag division.

America’s Most Wanted bt Legend and Ekmo (74/68/80) **1/2

---

Once again we cut back to the 3LK locker room where we see an interview already in progress.

JAMES – "Look man, I’m sorry but you’re just not what we’re lookin for."

The camera pans round and shows Abyss sitting opposite Killings and James.

ABYSS – "Arrrrrrgh."

KILLINGS – "You’re not exactly what we had in mind."

ABYSS – "Grrrrrr."

Abyss gets up from his chair and storms out the locker room.

KILLINGS – "Well he’s the best so far."

JAMES – "Heh, I know. Anyway bro I gotta jet, it’s intervizzle time."

BG gets up from his seat and leaves the room.

4. Today’s Topic - ‘My Women Keeps Costing Me Matches’

Yes ladles and jellyspoons, it’s everybody’s favourite portion of the show. I don’t need a narrative introduction you all know the drill by now. Lets join BG James in his barcalounger

JAMES – “Gooooooooood morning TNA and welcome once again to B-J to the Izzle Intervizzle. I as always am your host, the one and only, BG James, but before we begin I would like to make it clear that the opportunity to join the hottest stable in the world today is still open, I mean you’ve seen what we’ve had tonight, and it aint nothin’ special. Anyway on with the show, and tonight’s guests are none other than TNA’s hottest couple. No I’m not talking about Shane Douglas and Michael Shane, my guests tonight are Sonny Siaki and the lovely Trinity!”

Siaki comes out to the ring, stomping down the ramp followed by Trinity, who struggles to keep up. Both get on the apron and Trinity expects Siaki to hold the ropes open for her, but he just steps inside. Trinity stands annoyed on the apron until James leaves his chair and holds them open. James turns around to find Siaki already making himself at home in James’ B-G-Boy.

JAMES – “What in the hizzle to you think you’re doing?”

SIAKI – “What?”

JAMES – “Boy you better be getting out of my chair.”

Siaki reluctantly gets out of the chair and takes a seat in the other. James takes back his seat. Trinity waits for Siaki to move over, but he doesn’t even acknowledge her.

JAMES – “Is chivalry dead? Come over here sweetness, come sit with B-Jizzle.”

Trinity moves towards James and perches on his lap.

JAMES – “That’s better. Now Sonny in the past few weeks people including myself have noticed that you’ve been on a kinda of, well, you know, to be honest, oh hell you’ve been sucking more than a turbo powered vacuum.”

The audience chuckles at the expense of Siaki. He does not seem impressed, especially when he notices Trinity smirking.

SIAKI – “What are you laughing at ho, you’re the reason I’ve been losing all these matches!”

Trinity seems shocked and James uses this as an opportunity to probe further.

JAMES – “Oh come on Sonny, you can’t blame it all on her, I mean seriously, you’ve been sucking for two this past month or so.”

SIAKI – “I’m telling you, it’s all her. She interferes in my matches, steals my fans and she can’t even cut it in the sack!”

The crowd lets out a unanimous ‘oooh’ as Trinity’s face turn from annoyance to flat out hate.

JAMES – “Well Sonny they are some…interesting allegations. I’ve got an idea, we’ll put this one to the fans. So fans, why don’t you tell us who you think is the problem here.”

A united ‘Sonny sucks’ chant echoes through the arena, which brings a smile to the faces of James and especially Trinity.

SIAKI – “You people are wrong, it’s not me, it’s her, HER!”

The chants continues and seems to be getting louder and louder the more Siaki fights it.

SIAKI – “Shut up! All of you, shut up! I am the ‘Ace in the Hole’, I’m Sonny Siaki! This is your doing, bitch! You’ve turned me into a joke!”

Siaki has lost it! He jumps out of his chair and grabs Trinity by the throat. He is about to continue the assault when Super Bon Bon blazes through the arena.

69%

5. Not So Dastardly Danny Doring

Danny Doring comes out onto the stage and runs down to the ring. He slides inside and pulls Siaki off Trinity, throwing him to the ground.

DORING – “Hey Son, did you’re mother teach you it aint nice to put your hands on a woman?”

SIAKI – “Stay out of this Doring, this doesn’t concern you, it’s between me and that whore.”

DORING – “Sorry Sonny, I’m afraid I can’t do that. You see where I come from we treat our woman with respect, especially a woman as fine as this one. [Doring stares into the eyes of Trinity, which draws an embarrassed smile]. So boy, you’d better step off.”

SIAKI – “Or what?”

DORING – “Or I’m going to make you. Wanna try me?”

Siaki seems to have turned down the challenge of Doring, but as his back is turned Siaki tries to attack. He nails Doring a few times then whips him across the ring. Siaki goes for a clothesline, but Doring ducks underneath, spins him round and nails the Bareback. Doring and Trinity leave the ring together as Siaki is sprawled out on the mat.

73%

Danny Doring’s turn was complete. He’s now a face. Danny Doring gained overness from this turn and segment. Sonny Siaki gained overness.

6. An Old Rivalry Revisited

Not just the coolest, not just the best, but Justin Credible makes his way out to ringside for his No DQ match with Jerry Lynn. It’s believed that the new faces backstage are quite high on Credible. We should expect Credible to be challenging for the belt soon, but don’t be surprised to see him in and around the upper midcard scene. Lynn comes back to a good pop from the crowd, and the fight begins on the ramp. Credible and Lynn battle away on the outside using a few weapons, before Credible whips Lynn into the steps and gains the advantage. They go through some old ECW sequences in the ring, including the classic ‘Credible rope flip to clothesline’. Jerry takes back the advantage, using legdropping Credible face first onto a chair. He makes the cover but only gets a two on the now bloodied Credible. Lynn lifts Credible back to his feet and delivers a smooth backbreaker. He goes up onto the second rope, but Credible gets his second wind and knocks him back to the floor. Shoulders to the gut by Credible. He lifts Lynn up and sits him onto the top rope. Credible tries to climb, but he gets knocked off the top. He groggily gets back to his feet and pulled in by Lynn. Tornado DDT! Jerry makes the cover. 1, 2, 3. Chalk one up for the good guys. Lynn jumps up onto the corner and salutes the fans. Suddenly from behind he gets nailed with a chair. It’s Simon Diamond. Where the hell did he come from? Lynn gets up again only to be met with a second chair shot, this time right into a his skull. Lynn is left in a crumpled heap. I guess that’s 1-1 then.

Jerry Lynn bt Justin Credible (72/67/78) **1/4

---

For the third time tonight the camera’s find themselves at 3LK HQ. James and Killings are looking tired and fairly disgruntled.

JAMES – "Do you think we’ll ever find someone to make 2 into 3."

KILLINGS – "I dunno bro, but right now 2LK has a nice ring to it."

JAMES – "Heh, well lets see what we got, who’s next?"

Suprisingly the next man to try out is Shark Boy.

JAMES – "Well at least he’s different and I don’t think there’s much chance we’ll get another shark tryin to join."

KILLINGS – "Ok Shark Boy, you’ve passed the first test. Second test, charisma. Now me and my boy here are both very entertaining individuals, and always the life of the party. Why don’t you show us some of your stuff?"

Shark Boy gets up and starts running around the room with his hand on his hand on his head like a fin and humming the theme tune from Jaws. Killings doesn’t look too impressed, but looks over at James who can’t keep the smile off his face.

JAMES – "Hey, the kids’ pretty good."

KILLINGS – "Ok, ok, you may’ve passed that test, but there’s one more to come. Now after a hard days wrasslin, we like to let our hair down and partay. Now in order to party with us, you gotta be able to dance. So why don’t you bust out a move for us?"

Shark Boy shrugs his shoulders and begins to dance. Shark Boy’s dancing can only be described as the ‘Running Man’ fused with various shark like moves.

KILLINGS – "[chuckling] Ok, ok man, that’s good enough. We’ll be in touch."

Shark Boy gets up and leaves the 3LK members laughing to themselves as we go to the break.

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

7. Victim #3

As we come back, Tenay reports that there was some sort of ruckus during the break. The feed cuts to a video showing Julio Dinero standing in a darkened corridor, but then he’s suddenly attacked from behind. All that can be seen and heard is the clunk of a shovel against his skull. The camera zooms out to see Sinn, Slash and the monster Gacy standing over the fallen Dinero before Mitchell takes the spotlight.

“Haha, the war has begun. Victims number 1, 2 and 3 down, many more still to come. We shall not rest until TNA is has seen the light of our black church. Your time shall be soon, Raven.”

Slash, Sinn, Gacy and Mitchell leave the downed Dinero as we cut back to ringside.

45% (Ouch)

Main Event – Daniels and Styles Put On A Classic

Fan-fucking-tastic. That’s all that can be said about this match. These guys were fucking awesome. It’s amazing that they haven’t been put in some sort of angle together before now because the chemistry they showed will rival any match you’ll see all year. They went for around 15 minutes, just back and forth, back and forth, the crowd on the edge of their seats throughout. Daniels takes control with a superb STO. He makes the cover, but only gets a two count. Daniels looks to capitalise quickly via a double jump moonsault, but Styles rolls out of the way. Styles waits for Daniels to get back up then asai moonsaults off the middle rope. He flips over Daniels and catches him, the plants him with a reverse DDT. Styles takes a breather and allows the Fallen Angel to get back to a vertical base. He goes for a discus clothesline, but Daniels ducks and tags Styles with a back suplex. Legdrop by Daniels. He makes a cover but once again Styles gets a shoulder up, this time at 2 and a ½. Daniels whips Styles into the ropes. He comes back and Daniels leapfrogs him. He rolls backwards and tries the bodyscissors, but Styles catches him. Wheelbarrow suplex! Styles rolls back over Daniels. He pulls them both up to standing and looks like he’s going for an atomic drop, but instead nails the facebuster. Styles kips up to his feet and signals for the Styles Clash. He stalks the Fallen Angel, but is distracted as Jeff Jarrett runs down to ringside. He jumps onto the apron, but it met straight away by Styles. The distraction is enough though as Styles turns round straight into the Last Rites from Daniels. He covers and gets the 1, 2, 3. Jarrett and Daniels continue the assault on Styles, putting the boots to him. Jarrett picks him up and is about to deliver the Stroke, but Ron Killings runs down to make the save! His arrival causes the heels to scarper. The show ends as Killings helps Styles to his feet, neither man taking his eyes off the attackers.

Christopher Daniels bt AJ Styles (88/77/100) ****1/2

-End Show-

CQ - 72%

PPV - 0.22

12-11-03

Attendance - 3659

0. An Xciting Opener

The opening encounter was a perfect example of what fans love about TNA. They took four random guys and put them together in a tag team match just so that they can show off what they can do. The match also see the debuts of John Walters and Alex Shelley and the returns of Elix Skipper and Jason Cross. Cross shows us what we missed after he seemingly disappeared off the face of the earth with some high flying combos. Shelley as impresses the fans with the arsenal that made him a household name on the East coast. Skipper looks a tad off, which is unfortunate, but a solid performance from Walters carries that. With the mutual cancellation of Xplosion, this will probably be the only chance for fans to see new talent. Walters demonstrates nice heel psychology as he eventually wins the match for his team, forcing Cross to submit to a modified Boston crab. Good solid start to the show.

Elix Skipper and John Walters bt Alex Shelley and Jason Cross (55/41/69) ¾*

1. “That belt is mine!”

As promised, ‘Phenominel’ AJ Styles is making his way to the ring, and apparently he has a few things to get off his chest. The timekeeper slides in a microphone and AJ starts to rant.

STYLES – ”Two weeks ago, in this very ring, I was beaten by Jeff Jarrett. I’m not going to make excuses. I was in the match, and I saw the footage after, and I know he hit me with the belt. I could cry and moan all I want about how I was robbed or screwed, but what good would it do? At the end of the day, I lost. However Jeff, you have not seen the last of AJ Styles, and I will be getting that belt back. That belt is mine! See Jeff, I noticed that you aren’t booked in a match tonight, so why don’t you show everyone that you’re a real fighting champion and give me my rematch tonight!”

As AJ waits for the response to his challenge, some different music hits and out comes Don Callis.

CALLIS – “Sorry to disappoint you my boy, but Jeff isn’t in the house tonight. I thought he deserved the night off after such a hectic past few weeks, ya don’t know how much being a fighting champion can take out of you. But even if he was here, I think you’re jumping the gun a bit, I mean you’re challenging the champion on the back of a zero and one losing streak? Sorry junior, I just don’t think you’re championship material yet. However, I am a fair man, so I will give you a chance to prove your worth. Now what sort of match would draw the highest ratings? Hmmm I wonder. Haha, I’ve got a great idea. You can take on these men.”

From behind Callis comes Kevin Northcutt and the new goon, a man Tenay and West are calling Brandon Gage.

CALLIS – ”Now since you won’t find anyone who’ll cross the boss, I guess that makes tonight’s main event a HANDICAP match, hahaha. See you later, junior.”

Callis and the boys leave, with tonight’s main event set, and the odds firmly stacked against Styles.

73%

2. Can’t Win With Them, Can’t Win Without Them

In somewhat of a nothing match, the ‘Ace in the Hole’ Sonny Siaki, lead down to the ring by Trinity (who is looking HAWT tonight) will take on Julio Dinero of the Gathering. Speaking of the Gathering, no word yet when exactly Raven will be back in action. Apparently, sources backstage have said that he will be back before the end of the year. Wow, what a scoop there. Tenay and West, who don’t seem to care too much, go over the Gathering’s ongoing feud with Mitchell and Co. then discuss Siaki’s recent troubles with Trinity. Siaki dominates much of the match, using his size advantage and some basic power moves to beat down Julio. Siaki goes for his Siakolypse Now, but Julio rolls through the pumphandle. Trinity, seeing that her man is in trouble, jumps onto the apron. Julio applies a waistlock, and runs Siaki into Trinity, knocking him silly and her off the apron. Dinero rolls Siaki up and gets the 1-2-3. After the match, Siaki is sulking in the ring, when Trinity enters. He’s not a happy bunny that she cost him another match. He starts yelling at her, mouthing ‘what the hell did you do that for’. She tries to explain that she was only trying to help her man, but The Son is having none of it. He pushes her out of his way and leaves the ring. Women!

Julio Dinero bt Sonny Siaki w/Trinity (65/54/77) *3/4

Julio Dinero gained overness from this segment

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

3. B-Jizzle Intervizzle Gets Franchised

We come back to find BG James, sitting in his new Barcalounger, cool box by his side. That’s right viewers, it’s time for another edition of B-Jizzle Intervizzle. So lets hand over to our host, shall we.

JAMES – “Helllllllllllllo Nashville, and welcome to your favourite part of the show. No it’s not the close up of the TNA dancers, it’s B-Jizzle Intervizzle. As you may notice I have gotten myself a brand new chair, set me back a fair few greenbacks too, but nothings too expensive for all my fans out there in DirectTVland. Now before we start, I have some bad news for any 3LK fans. It seems that we’re down to 2LK, after Konnan flew the coop and signed a deal with the devil himself. (A few boos are heard from the crowd). Yeah I know, but on behalf of myself and Ron, I’d like to wish the fat fuck the best of luck! Course this means we will be holdin’ auditions for a new member of 3LK, but that’s another story for another day. So anyway, on with the intervizzle. Tonight’s guest is none other than the Franchise, Dean, oh sorry, I mean Shane Douglas.”

Douglas comes through the curtain, accompanied by his protégé ‘The New Franchise’ Michael Shane. Shane carries his X Division title over his shoulder, shining it as he goes.

JAMES – “Come on guys, we haven’t got all day. Shane please, take a seat, errr Michael, well er you can sit on Shane’s lap if you like, we’re all friends here. (Both men give James a deadly stare). Or not. So, down to business. Two weeks ago, you both attacked Chris Sabin after naming him as your new Franchise…”

DOUGLAS – “No, I did not name him my new Franchise, I named this man the new Franchise. There was never any doubt in my mind that this man right here has what it takes to fill my shoes.”

JAMES – ”[mumbles] Well I’m sure he can fill something of yours, dunno about boots.[/mumbles] Moving quickly on, I’ve seen Sabin, as have you both, and he’s mighty impressive in the ring. Now what exactly does he not have that this boy does?”

DOUGLAS – “Sabin is nothing in comparison to this man here, but not only that, Sabin is just not Franchise material. To be the Franchise you have to do what it takes to win, whatever the consequences. It’s all about looking out for number 1. You don’t need friends or allies. I never needed anyone. I did it all on my own, and look what I accomplished. And Sabin, you’ll never get close to that, not in your wildest dreams. You think you can cut it in TNA? You think you can beat this man? You haven’t got a hope in hell, boy. Soon boy, soon you will know, like many other before you, what it’s like to FRANCHISED!”

JAMES – ”Well folks, that’s all we’ve got time for this week. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a match with that big ole barrel of shizzle.”

4. Victim #1

BG James watches the ring crew clear his set then eagerly awaits his opponent. He is not disappointed as sure enough, Father James leads out his monster. The crowd are almost silent at his arrival, not really knowing what to make of him. Mitchell says something to the behemoth, then leaves to join Tenay and West at the announce table. Apparently the monster’s name is Gacy. James throws caution to the wind, going straight for Gacy before the bell. He tries some big rights, but the monster doesn’t even flinch. James tries whipping him into the ropes, but it’s reversed. Gacy goes for a sluggish clothesline, but James ducks under. He comes back with a flying forearm, but the big man merely wobbles. James tries his Shake, Rattle and Roll, but as he’s jigging around, Gacy levels him with a club like fist. He whips James into the corner and follows in with a HUGE avalanche splash. BG staggers back to the centre of the ring. Gacy picks him up for a fireman’s carry, then drops to his knees, crushing the ribs of James. The giant covers James and gets an easy debut victory.

Gacy w/Father Mitchell bt BG James (63/52/75) *1/2

Gacy gained overness from this segment. BG James lost overness from this segment

5. Mitchell Unveils His Monster

Mitchell leaves the announce position to join Gacy in the ring, who is standing over the lifeless body of BG James. Mitchell stands next to his personal behemoth, who’s eyes do not stray from his victim.

MITCHELL – “Tonight, Nashville has witness just a mere taste of what is to come. We have declared war on TNA; apostle on it’s impurities. It’s a moral quest, as my dark army attempt to cleanse the cesspool of hate and sin. Battles are fought by those with the courage to believe, and we know that there are many more battles to fight before the war is won. Still we have not expelled the man that sickens me the the heart of my soul. Raven, thus far you have proved a worthy foe, but soon the fighting will take it’s toll on you, and that is when we will pounce, for there is only one of you, but there are many of us. We lurk in the shadows of society’s degeneration. We come from all corners of the world, with only one goal, one aim in mind; to help all those who follow, and to punish all who don’t believe. Raven, the pain you caused me is far greater than anything I would wish on my fellow man. However, it is your demons that will be lead you to your demise, and this man will help set you on your way. He is the cryptkeeper of our dark ministry. He is an unstoppable, unbreakable being, more myth than man. He will beat you within an inch of your life, and steal your soul. Mr James here is just the first of many victims, and the trail of the destruction will not end until I have vengeance.”

63%

Gacy gained overness from this segment

6. And The Tag Team Champions Are…

The fans stood in awe as the time came for the tag team title match. Could it be that the fans want to watch another classic battle between TNA’s two top teams, or perhaps that this match could mean the end to their (way to) long running feud. Simon and Swinger make their way down the ramp, followed sharply by the Disco Gilbertti. Cowboy and Wildcat are up next, charging down to the ring to get this contest going quickly. Where the hell did the name America’s Most Wanted come from anyway? The 4 men slug it out in the ring before the ref gets control and sends Harris and Simon to their corners. The match goes back and forth for around 12 minutes, with neither team taking the advantage. The tides turn when Diamond nails Harris with the Simon Series. He makes the cover, but Harris kicks out at 2. Tag to Swinger. They double team whip him into the ropes. He comes back straight into a double back bodydrop. Gilbertti senses victory and jumps onto the apron, and begins applauding Simon and Swinger. They don’t know what he is doing, and Swinger begins shouting at Gilbertti. Swinger turns round and goes for a suplex, but he gets small packaged by Harris. 1…2…3! Harris was playing possum! The distraction by Gilbertti cost S&S their titles. Harris and Storm are handed their belts and celebrate up the ramp. Gilbertti asks S&S ‘what happened?’ Simon and Swinger give each other a look, then laid Disco out with a couple of huge rights! They leave Disco lying in the centre of the ring, out cold.

America’s Most Wanted bt Simon and Swinger for the NWA Tag Team Titles (71/67/76) **

The NWA Tag Titles gained image

7. A Spiritual Proposition

Backstage, the camera finds down on his luck Vince Russo skulking in a corridor, head deep in a magazine which looks to be titled ‘Horoscope Today’. Into camera view comes Christopher Daniels, who it seems has some words of wisdom for Russo.

DANIELS – “What’s the matter Vince, looking for a bit of spiritual guidence.”

RUSSO – “You could say that Chris. Nothing’s going my way, I gawt nuttin’."

DANIELS – “Don’t overview things Vince. The answers are right in front of your face. Just open your eyes, and the path will become clear."

Daniels walks off, leaving Russo muttering to himself.

RUSSO – “Open my eyes, an da path will come clear, yeh.”

Russo drops his magazine and walks away from the camera looking slightly more at ease.

80%

-COMMERCIAL BREAK-

Main Event – Two’s Company, Three’s A Crowd. So What Does That Make Four?

As we come back from the commerical break, Don Callis is bring his Red Security goons down to the ring. Kevin Northcutt and Brandon Gage step onto the stage. Well this is all TNA needs, the Harris Brothers Version 2. Hopefully their offence is slightly better than punch, kick, clothesline, H-Bomb. The heat for them is probably due to Callis being there, as he’s possibly the top heel in the company right now. They wait in the ring, ready for their handicap match. And sure enough, their opponent, AJ Styles comes through the curtain to a rousing reception. He doesn’t come down to the ring, just stands at the top, as if he’s waiting for someone. IT’S JERRY LYNN. What is he doing here?

CALLIS – “Wait, wait, wait, hold up a second, this is supposed to be a HANDICAP match. You can’t have a partner.”

STYLES – “Sorry Don, you’re wrong on this one. You said that I WOULDN’T find anyone who would cross the boss, not that I couldn’t. So Jerry has kindly volunteered to tag with me, and there’s nothing you can do about it!”

Lynn and Styles run down to the ring and begin their match with the Red Shirts. Much to the surprise of the crowd, these 4 men had an extremely good match. Callis couldn’t stay out of the encounter, interfering many time on behalf of his boys. Northcutt drags Styles over to his corner and makes the tag to Brandon Gage. Gage reminds me of Bull Buchanan, but with talent. He gives Styles some clubbing blows to the back, then kicks him square in the ribs. He lifts Styles by the neck and throws him into the corner. Gage bounces off the ropes and scrapes his boot right across the face of Styles. He tries for it a second time, but Styles moves his head. He gets back to his feet and you can hear the impact on his skull as Styles connects with an Enziguri. Northcutt comes into the ring, but is met halfway by Lynn. Kick to the gut of Northcutt. Cradle Piledriver! Gage meets a double clothesline. Styles runs towards the ropes and springboard off, over Gage catching him and then planting him with a Reverse DDT. AJ goes to the top rope. Spiral Tap! Styles goes to make the cover, but Callis comes in and interrupts the count. He turns to the crowd, taunting them, and forgetting the Lynn and Styles are standing behind him. Callis turns around. Kick to the gut. Styles sets him up. Styles Clash! Gage gets back to his feet. Another kick to the gut. Styles Clash to Gage. AJ makes the cover, and gets the 3 count. Lynn and Styles celebrate in the ring as another edition of Total Nonstop Action goes off the air.

AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn bt Kevin Northcutt and Brandon Gage (72/55/90) ***3/4

-End Show-

CQ - 70%

PPV - 0.22

5-11-03

Attendance - 3905

The show opens with highlights of last weeks main event, then Tenay and West discuss current TNA happenings and then go through the card.

0. Your World Champion

Jeff Jarrett makes his way down to the ring to kick of this week’s edition of Total Nonstop Acton. Strangely he stops at the top of the ramp, and soon it is clear why. Through the curtain comes Don Callis. Both men walk smugly into the ring, Callis holding the ropes open for Jarrett. Don grabs the stick. This should actually be pretty entertaining.

CALLIS – "Come on Nashville, give it up for YOUR world champion, Jeff Jarrett. (A chorus of boos echoes through the arena, and many ‘Triple J’ chants are heard). You people should be happy. You finally have a real man representing NWATNA, not like that AJ Styles. People call him phenominal, well you know what I call this man? TREMENDOUS! (More boos are heard). See, this is why I hate Nashville. You people don’t know talent when you see it. If this was Canada, well if this was Canada none of you would have webbed feet but, if this was Canada, we’d be on our feet applauding this man. He is the savoir of this company, the Chosen One if you will. (Boos). Now I could go on for hours about this man, but instead I will hand over to him. Take it away, Jeff.”

Before he can begin, he’s met with a chorus of boos.

JARRETT – “Shut the hell up! I don’t need your shit. That’s all I’ve had all week ‘Jeff why did you side with Callis?’ ‘Why did you turn your back on the fans?’ You wanna know why? Business. I know a good business decision when I see one, and when Mr Callis approached me about a business partnership, I could not reject. Then y’all have the nerve to ask my why I turned my back on you? You really want to know? It’s because you don’t matter. I don’t care about the fans, all I care about is winning. There aint a single guy in the back who can beat me…”

Jarrett’s egotistical speech is interrupted by the entrance of Ron Killings, drawing a big pop from the crowd.

80%

Don Callis gained overness from this segment.

1. Killings Calls Jarrett’s Bluff

The Truth walks down the ramp and round to the announcers desk, where he takes a microphone, then joins Jarrett and Callis in the ring.

KILLINGS - “Aint nobody who can beat you? Nobody who can beat you? Boy, you better watch that tongue or someone’s going to call you on it.”

JARRETT – “I aint scared of you, you rapping retard, so why don’t you step back through those ropes and go get rowdy somewhere else, boy.”

KILLINGS – “Haha, no actually I got a better idea. Since your big mouth is doing all the talking, why don’t you try and back it up for once. What’s say you and me have a match tonight, for that belt?

JARRETT – “Well you know I’d love to but…”

Jarrrett turns around then goes for Killings with the title belt, but the Truth is aware and ducks the oncoming attack. He plants some big rights, then whips Jarrett across the ring, following him in with a clothesline. Killings turns and sees Callis lining up a belt shot, who decides against it now that he’s been rumbled and ducks under the bottom rope.

JARRETT – “You want your match, boy, you got it. I’ll see you later tonight!”

78%

2. ‘Heavy D’ Takes Northcutt To School

Clash of the not-so-Titans, as Don Harris takes on Kevin Northcutt of the Red Shirt Security. The two go through their basic arsenal, before D takes advantage. He whips Northcutt into the ropes, and nails a huge size 16 boot to the face. D tries to finish his opponent off Hulkamania style, but there’s a kick out at 2. D, reeking charisma and something else that the crowd can’t quite put their finger on (it’s like a cross between machismo and shit), tells Northcutt to get to his feet. D looks to be going for another big boot, but as he backs against the ropes, somebody jumps the rails and pulls down the top rope. He’s wearing a red shirt. I assume he’s another goomba hired by Callis for his private security force. Northcutt and new guy do a number on Heavy D on the outside, which brings Erik Watts to the ring. He takes out both men, sending new guy over the guardrail. D has now taken Northcutt back into the ring, and sets him up for a one man H Bomb, connecting and picking up the win. Wow, this feud is spicier than a La Resistance-Dudley Boyz repetition!

'Heavy D' Don Harris bt Kevin Northcutt (49/40/59) DUD

3. Disco Sets A Final Challenge

Disco Gilbertti leads his more talented associates down to ringside. The three are due to team up tonight against America’s Most Wanted and D’Lo ‘Nothing planned for me’ Brown. He picks up the stick. Oh you know this is going to be good.

DISCO – "Alright Harris, Strom, tonight I have one final challenge for you. Now in the past couple of weeks, I’ve put various barriers in your way, and well to be honest, you’ve proven yourselves to be worthy of a tag team title shot. Doesn’t mean you’re gunna get it though heh heh heh (Disco chuckles to himself, as S&S just look bemused). Tonight you have one final obstacle before you can get to the champs, yes, that’s right, Glen Gilbertti is going to single handedly win this 6 man tag and save your (points at S&S) tag team titles. So, America's Least Wanted (Glen chortles to himself at his superior witt), bring that WWE reject down here (forgetting that he himself is a WCW reject who twice lost to Jacqueline), and I’ll show you how a real man takes care of business."

80%

4. Disco Fever Stopped Dead In It’s Tracks

An average at best 6 man tag, in what on paper would have been a very good 2 on 3 handicap match. Unfortunately for the fans, Disco Glen decided that he would take most the responsibility for his team, and wrestle virtually the entire match. Eventually Disco made a tag out, and S&S managed to isolate Harris. Simon was just about to finish him off and defy AMW of the tag title shot, signalling for the Problem Solver, when Disco Glen slapped him on the back, forcing the tag. He decided that he would be the man to finish Harris off, as he casually went for the Last Dance. Wildcat had other ideas. Grabbing his second wind, he reversed Disco’s stunner attempt into a back suplex, then made the tag to Cowboy James Storm. Storm came in, bucking like a bronco, cleaning house faster than a British sprinter on ‘roids. He knock both Simon and Swinger off the apron, the AMW gave Disco Glen the Death Penalty for the win. After the match, S&S looked mighty pissed at Gilbertti.

America's Most Wanted and D'Lo Brown bt Glen Gilbertti, Simon and Swinger (64/62/67) *

5. Ladies And Gentlemen, Boys And Girls, Children Of All Ages...

We come back from our short commercial break to find BG James standing in the ring. Joining him inside the squared circle are two brown, leather Barcaloungers, a cool box and a beautiful red carpet. James has a microphone in hand, and looks ready to reveal what is going on.

JAMES – "Welcome one and all to Total Nonstop Action’s latest edition. Yes that’s right kiddies, the boss man has given ‘B Jizzle’ his own interview slot. So here it is ladies and germs. Feast your eyes on ‘B Jizzle Intervizzle’. Each week, or whenever I feel like it, I will bring you indepth interviews with your favourite TNA stars. And if that doesn’t float your boat, then it’s always a chance to see the one and only, yes that’s right, I’m talking about me, the B-G-Double Izzle, BG James. Now, before we start, I’ll give you the tour of the set."

James stops, hand on brow and starts looking around his set.

JAMES – "Well that’s about it, oh yeah, I almost forgot the best part, my very own customised B-G-Boy chair. I had my boy Konnan hook me up with this one. Anyway, without further ado, let me introduce my first guest. This man has caused a sensation in TNA since his arrival, taking on all comers and showing us that the next generation of fans will be in good hands. I’m proud to introduce to you, CM PUNK!"

CM Punk comes through the curtain to a rousing reception from the Nashville crowd. He slaps a few hands and then stomps his way up the steal steps. Punk walks along the apron and enters the ring, not before wiping his feet, which draws a smile from James.

JAMES – "Well Punk, it’s a pleasure to have you on my show."

PUNK – "Thanks for inviting me, BG."

JAMES – "Well lets get this thing going then, take a seat."

The two take their seats. BG motions for Punk to recline his chair, and the two men do in stereo, which brings a chuckle from the crowd.

JAMES – "So Punk…oh yeah, can’t start without refreshment. Punk [puts on a stereotypical English accent] be a good lad and throw me one of those beers, good chap.[/accent] Cheers boy, feel free to take one for yourself, oh yeah I forgot you don’t do that whole thing. Anyway, (James takes a sip of his beer) anyway Punk, you’ve caused quite a stir in TNA since joining our great company."

PUNK – "Why thank you."

JAMES – "Yeh, well, you’ve caused quite a stir, so when do you think you’ll finally pluck up the guts to challenge the great BG James to a match."

PUNK – "[chuckles] Well BG, I’m not sure I’m quite ready of that yet, but maybe somewhere down the line."

JAMES – "Oh, that sounds like fighting talk to me, heh. Well, you debuted fighting alongside one of TNA’s top and most mysterious stars, Raven? Tell us about that relationship."

PUNK – "What can I say, Raven has been more than just a mentor to me. He’s been more like a father figure, showing me how to better myself and become a better wrestler. I owe some much to him."

JAMES – "Man, that’s tight. I suppose that means you’re a tad peeved about last week’s attack by Father Jimmy Mitchell and his goons."

PUNK – "Peeved isn’t the word BG. When I think of what they did to Raven, my heart fills with a burning hatred. I’d just love to get my hands on that sinister bastard."

Punk is about to continue, when the arena fills with some spine chilling music, and Father Mitchell appears on the stage. He is not alone. He is leading the monster from last week down to the ring.

JAMES – "Well it looks like my second guest on ‘B Jizzle Intervizzle’ is Father Jimmy Mitchell. Welcome Jimmy."

MITCHELL – "That’s Father James Mitchell to you, you inbred hick."

JAMES – "Whoa whoa whoa, slow your roll there Jimmy. Now this is my show, so you better show me some respect or get the stepping."

This brings the monster into the equation. He moves in front of Mitchell and stares down James. Although the James is not swamped by him in height, he’s outweighed by what must be close to 100lbs.

JAMES – "Look here you fat piece of shizzle, you better step off before I make you."

James throws a right hand, but it does nothing. He tries a second, but the giant catches his fist, and nails a short arm clothesline. This brings Punk into the fray. He jumps off his lounger, with a big lariat attempt. This merely wobbles the man mountain. Punk bounces off the ropes and tries a crossbody, but as expected, he is caught in mid air. The monster swings him round and slams him through James’ barcalounger, breaking it in half. Mitchell cackles then beckons for his monster to leave. As they are walking back up the ramp, the camera pans back to the ring. Punk helps James to his feet, and the camera picks up on him saying ‘that bastard broke my chair!’

52%

Mitchell’s Monster gained overness from this segment.

6. Like Franchise, Like Son.

The past and future Franchises teamed up together for the first time to take on fan favourites, Sonjay Dutt and Chris Sabin. Shane had obviously been taught well as he immediately went through Douglas’ old ‘Heel Book of Tricks’ including an assisted abdominal stretch, which is on the verge of extinction. Michael Shane still comes out in his old attire, however it can’t be long before he dons the streamer lined boots. Sabin and Shane show some great chemistry, and Sonjay evens adapts well to carry Douglas through a good manhandling. Eventually Shane takes control of Sonjay, thanks mostly to Douglas pulling him to the outside and running him into the ringpost. Shane gives Dutt a body slam, then goes up to the top rope. He tries a HBKesque elbow drop, but Dutt manages to roll out of the way and make the tag to Sabin. Huge enziguri kick to the side of Shane’s head. He knocks Douglas off the apron, which leads to Sonjay charging over and corkscrew diving onto him. Sabin goes for the Future Shock, but Shane reverses down the back, then spins him round, going for a powerbomb like move. He lifts Sabin up, only to be flipped over via a sudden hurricanrana. Sabin goes for the cover, but Douglas interrupts the count by pulling the ref to the outside. Sabin argues with the official about the count, which allows Douglas to through Shane a steel chain. He wraps it around his knuckles and clocks Sabin right in the jaw. Sabin then groggily turns around into a Superkick, as the Franchises pick up the victory. Douglas raises the arm of Shane triumphantly, which allows Sonjay to help Sabin to his feet. The Franchises turn around, and are met with a pair of dropkicks, sending them through the ropes! Douglas and Shane angrily retreat up the ramp as Sabin and Dutt taunt them.

Michael Shane and Shane Douglas bt Sonjay Dutt and Chris Sabin (62/51/74) *1/2

7. The Fallen Star Lies In Wait

It’s time for our main event, but instead of the camera going live to our ring, they instead find themselves inside the locker room of one AJ Styles. The former champ is in his street gear, eyes focused on the screen. He must feel that he is the number one contender to whoever wins tonight’s match.

74%

Main Event - Jarrett Avoids A Killing

After an earlier incident, the show closed with Jeff Jarrettp defending his NWA World title against Ron Killings. Jarrett was once again accompanied to the ring by Don Callis, which can't be good for the rest of TNA. Jarrett's underhanded heel tactics went unpunished as the official was often trying to deal with the devious Callis. Killings took the upperhand after Jarrett exposed the top turnbuckle. He tried to whip Killings across the ring, but Killings reversed, and gave Jarrett a vicious spinebuster. He held onto Jarrett's legs then slingshotted him onto the exposed turnbuckle! Jarrett got busted wide open from the impact. Callis, sensing a turn in the tide, jumped up onto the apron, but Killings threw him inside the ring with the old rope pull routine. Killings lifted Callis up into a Gorilla Press position, and it looked like he was going to slam Callis, until Jarrett chopblocked him from behind. Killings hit the ground clutching his knee, as Callis was helped out the ring. Jarrett went back to The Truth, locking him in his former patented Figure Four Leglock. Killings struggled to reach the ropes, but couldn't quite make it. Somehow, Killings managed to roll Jarrett over, reversing the hold and putting the pressure on Jarrett, forcing him to break the hold. Jarrett went for a lariat, but Killings ducked. Suplex to Jarrett. Discus clothesline to Jarrett. Killings is on a roll. Jarrett gets set up for a sitout front suplex, but Callis has seen enough. He slides a chair into the ring, and then jumps onto the apron, distracting the ref. Killings sees this very early, and hits a big right hand. The Truth turns round, but it's straight into a chair shot from Jarrett. The ref saw it and he calls for the bell. Killings gets the DQ victory.

Ron Killings bt Jeff Jarrett by Disqualification (80/81/80) **3/4

Ron Killings gained overness from this segment. The NWA World title gained image from this segment.

Jarrett and Callis walk back up the ramp as Killings celebrates his victory inside the ring.

-End Show-

CQ - 69%

TV - 0.26

Tying Up The Loose Ends

29/10 Recap

-Vampiro, with the help of Father James Mitchell and his latest follower, a behemoth of a man who has yet to named, defeated Raven in a bloody, ridiculously stipulated battle. Mitchell brought his monster down to the ring, which distracted Raven. They stood toe to toe in the ring, as Mitchell handed Vampiro a foreign object. When Raven turned round he was met with a deadly fireball, allowing Vampiro to pick up the victory over his foe.

-America's Most Wanted easily defeated Glen Gilbertti and David Young in a pointless bout, continuing their meaningless feud.

-Kid Kash defeated Abyss after hitting him with a loaded fist. Afterwards, Kid Kash managed to evade the attack of Abyss, which could hopefully mean their feuding is over.

-The security fought. Nobody cared about the result.

-Shane Douglas came out to the ring to announce his new Franchise protege. This brought out Michael Shane, who told Douglas there was no need to keep the people in suspence any longer, because the future Franchise was here. Douglas shocked everybody, revealing the man he had handpicked to take over his reign was Chris Sabin. This brought Sabin to the ring. He told the Franchise how honoured he was, however he couldn't accept, as he didn't want to live in anyone's shadow. The Franchise seemed shocked, but accepted Sabin's decision, offering his hand. Sabin accepted, but Douglas nailed him with a clothesline. Sabin got to his feet only to meet a Superkick from Shane. The two attackers embraced, and continued the assault on Sabin, which brought Sonjay Dutt to the ring for his X Division title shot. Unfortunately for Sonjay, he was unsuccessful after Shane distracted the ref, allowing Douglas to hit the Franchiser.

-In the main event, Jeff Jarrett awaited the arrival of Jimmy Hart's mystery client. The fans were shocked to see the man who would challenge the champ was none other than Brutsu Beefcake! The crowd roared with disapproval, as chants of 'who booked this shit?' rang through the entire match. After a short match, Jarrett was victorious, hitting the Stroke for the win.

That brings everything up to date. The next show will be the first with me in charge. Let me know when things get logical and I shall explain how I got here.

NWATNA was born in mid 2002, the brainchild of Jerry Jarrett. Many were sceptical as it began, thinking it would go the way of XWF. However, it defied the critics and made it through a rough first year. Now, as we move towards 2004, Jerry and the boys are looking to make a serious attempt at wrestling glory, and a battle with Goliath – Vincent K McMahon and the WWE boys.

Unfortunately, they are in no position to take on the ‘Big 1’ as things stand at the moment. They are quite obviously top of the Indies, but they need improvement to make the step up required.

But what is TNA’s problem? Maybe it’s the fact that they are trying to appeal only to just the casual fan. Every week they are trying to attract the new viewers; the ones that decide to pay $9.95 to see a taster of Total Nonstop Action. They are trying to build a fanbase, but forgetting about the regular viewers in the process. They have to realise that regular viewers don’t tune in every week to see constant shock moments, gimmick matches and one off stars. They want to see well thought out matches and developing storylines. At first it was great. The three ways between Low Ki, AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn wowed audiences. They loved being treated to gimmick matches and one of appearance. However things soon diminished. For every X Division classic, there was a bout with a NASCAR star. For every Ultimate X, there was the Dupp Cup. For every Super X tournament, there was the Hard 10 cup. For every AMW-XXX cage match, there was the Maximos versus the Flying Elvises. For every Gathering, there was an S.E.X. For every Raven debut, there was a Franchise cock-up. For every AJ Styles, there was a Dusty Rhodes. For every Jerry Lynn, there was a Glen Gilbertti. For every Jeff Jarrett, there was a Harris brother. For every Don Callis, there was a Vince Russo. And yes, for every Mike Tenay, there was a Don West.

That’s where I come in. I’d tell you about how and why I am involved in the revolution, but it’s TNA, so I don’t need to. When was the last time a storyline made sense? When was the last time things were thought through? When was the last time that TNA actually made sense? They don’t need a reason for anything, so neither do I. When things start to make sense, I will reveal all and everything will make sense.

And so it begins. How long will it last and how successful will it be? Your guess is as good as mine.

---

After a good few months of not knowing what to do, I have decided to bring my most successful diary back. Taking a page out of conniption's book I am going to post a few shows at a time to give people a chance to read/reread them (although I know they aren't nearly as epic as GBW). This thread will only be used to post old shows. I will create a new thread for the new ones soonish.

After seeing the trailers I was definately going to go see it, but I was a bit iffy about seeing it after I heard it was a 12A. I think it might be one to see with the missus if the alternative is some shitty romantic comedy.

As you may have read in The Lounge, I have just passed my driving test. I'm driving to Football training tonight and I want to make myself a CD to listen to. So can anyone recommend some good songs? I'm looking for current stuff, a little bit rudeboy, like rap, R&B, shit like that. Thanks.

"Luck Of The Fryish" was part of the third season, "30% Iron Chef" (where Bender takes on Elzar in an Iron Chef cookoff) was in season four, and the greatest Futurama episode ever was in season five:  "Jurassic Bark".

So I dare say Futurama stayed pretty good up until its end.

←

What happened in Jurassic Bark?