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Olive the other Jiberdeer

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  11. WWE: For Better, or Worse

    in The Dome Retro Room

    Posted · Edited by theonemankliq

    Here's the Velocity results for this week in the format that WWE.com gives for Smackdown! and RAW results. I expect that Stokes will follow suit with this style for Heat.

    Velocity—August 21st, 2004

    user posted image

    An action packed Velocity this week, with none other than Maven taking Bill Demott’s spot in the commentary chair next to Josh Matthews!

    In singles action Chavo Guerrero took on Orlando Jordan in an intense match. Guerrero took it to the air the entire time while Jordan attempted to keep him grounded. In the end Guerrero hit a tornado DDT for the win!

    Torrie Wilson was followed by someone in a black cloak as she walked out of the building to her car. The eerie figure got into a black convertible and went on to follow her car! (79 %)

    Rhyno took on Rey Mysterio in a short match, lasting a total of thirty seconds. Rhyno hit the gore with a chair on his shoulder and got the three count!

    In the main event a surprise in Val Venis teamed with Billy Gun and Hardcore Holly to take on The Bashams and Jonny the Bull! With the Money Shot and a smug grin on his face, a new Smackdown! superstar stole the show! Afterwards, Val explained that on Raw there wasn’t enough “talent” for his new productions, so he came over to Smackdown to try to Smack something other than his TV, if you catch his drift ;). (79%)

    MATCH RESULTS:

    Chavo Guerrero defeated Orlando Jordan (69%)

    Funaki defeated Jaime Noble (79%)

    Rhyno defeated Rey Mysterio (81%)

    Gunn/Holly/Venis defeated The Bashams and Jonny the Bull (69%)

  13. WWE: For Better, or Worse

    in The Dome Retro Room

    Posted · Edited by theonemankliq

    :o

    Thank you very much...I'm somewhat shocked.

    until you mentioned a man who has a written deal already in TNA and a man making his return but in reality he is preparing to get his K1 career to start

    I was fully aware of those...I "convinced" them to re-join with us :P

    ERC title I like, but I don't like the fact that the Cruiserweight title has gone, as you now have 15 or so less guys off Smackdown. Perhaps they'll be challenging for the ERC?

    Indeed. You see, after a few trades over to RAW, my cruiserweight division was tanked, so I had three options:

    1) Do with what I have and have people get overtired of Mysterio vs X

    2) Raid the indy's and have my booking seem more unrealistic than it already is (:P) Or,

    3) Kill off the title and bring in one anew.

    I chose three, and originally had plans to call the old ECW title the new WWE Hardcore Title. Then in the spirit of continuality of WWE storylines, I decided not to since tecnically the HC Championship is part of the Worlds Championship now, so I brought in ERC.

    I also had plans for someone else to be GM, but that immediately fell through.

    I'm hoping for Velocity sometime this evening, and I should let you all know this now. I'm going away for a week this Saturday, and upon arriving home, I'll be tired as Rikishi and Scotty 2 Hotty's gimmicks, so don't expect SD! until next Tuesday at the earliest.

    EDIT: I should also tell you that these firings that are happening are 3 month long WWE firings in which people are allowed to turn (Angle) or get a rehashed gimmick (Cena) or heal up (Eddie)

  14. WWE: For Better, or Worse

    in The Dome Retro Room

    Posted

    Out of boredom, here's an internet report.

    user posted image

    What you didn't see on Smackdown!

    Impact Fan John writes:

    Hey, Just got back from the Smackdown tapings. Pretty good, but no Velocity. They said it'd be taped on Wednesday before a house show in Nova Scotia.

    Dark Matches:

    The Bashams def. A Team called The Young Blood...didn't catch their individual names.

    Orlando Jordan def. Big Bad Burchill...I assumed that the latter was a new developmental guy...looked like he knew what he was doing to some extent, but still pretty green, even next to Jordan.

    The WWE Desire video featured "All For You' By Our Lady Peace.

    Shane McMahon was at ringside, but always outside of the camera's view. He had a cast on one of his legs.

    After the show ended, Taker sat up, and Kane fled to the ramp. They had some "words" and all of a sudden the lights went out, just to hear an "Oh Yeeeaaaaaas!!!" presumably from Paul Bearer. When the lights came back on, Kane was gone, and Taker looking somewhat confused. He taunted with the belt and Tony Chimel thanked us for coming.

  16. WWE: For Better, or Worse

    in The Dome Retro Room

    Posted

    Wow, she showed up not long afterwards!

    user posted image

    Smackdown! – August 19th, 2004 from the Copps Coliseum, in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada

    “…I want it all, no less, so come on!”

    Cole: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Smackdown! We’re on the heels of an intense Summerslam which saw us get a new boss, in the form of General Manager Paul Heyman! Michael Cole alongside Tazz, and well partner, Summerslam was chock full of shocks.

    Tazz: Indeed Cole, indeed: Summerslam was a rocketbustah! We saw The Dudley Boyz overtake Kidman and London, Rob Van Dam become the new US champion over Rene Dupree, Booker T and Kenzo Suzuki and of course, there’s a new WWE Champion in the Undertaker.

    He is indeed back

    "I’m back!!”

    Cole: What’s this?

    Tazz: That’s Eric Bischoff’s music! What’s he doing on Smackdown?

    Out of the curtain comes…Paul Heyman. To even more heat than the music was getting alone, he makes his way to the ring, microphone in hand, and a grin that’s so wide that it looks nearly painful. He climbs into the ring and basks in the overpowering boos. The music stops as Heyman brings the mic to his face.

    Heyman: Sorry Eric…it just seemed right…I’m back! And I’d like to welcome you all back to Paul Heyman’s Smackdown!

    Guess what? More heat.

    Heyman: Well, well, well. It seems that the crowds here are a bit upset that Paul E. Heyman has once again risen to the occasion. I have once again become top dog on Smackdown, and I will once again rise to the occasion each and every night. You see, Kurt Angle was not a professional man. He traded Triple H back over to RAW. He was not fit for business, and he didn’t understand what a Pay Per View is all about. You see, what Angle had for a Summerslam will be my re-debut to Smackdown!

    The crowd gets somewhat interested.

    Heyman: Oh yes, Summerslam, nearly to a tee, except for two slight changes. Due to three of the competitors not being available, all three of them being fired, John Cena and Eddie Guererro VS Kurt Angle and Luther Reigns cannot repeat. Therefore, in an ingeneous plan, I will include former United States champion John Cena in tonight’s match with RVD, Booker T and Rene Dupree for that mentioned title!

    Oh yes, Cena’s name alone deserves a pop.

    Heyman: Unfortunately, if Mr. Cena fails to win that title tonight, then I will be forced to relieve him of his duties here on Smackdown.

    As quickly as you can get a John Cena pop, heat can be radiated from Mr. Paul Heyman. The fans demonstrate this.

    Heyman: I’m sorry, but it’s simply the way things are. Paul Heyman’s Smackdown will reach new limits…in fact, it will have no limits. That brings me to my next point of the evening. Rey Mysterio, you currently hold the Cruiserweight Championship. I will need to strip you of it, as it is being officially retired. You see, that title has…limits. I want to create a show each week where the audience wonders what will happen next…that reminds me of a certain promotion in the Philadelphia area…

    Heyman pulls out of his jacket what appears to be the ECW Title, save the fact that the purple writing has been altered to say ERC. A traditional E-C-DUB chant starts up.

    Heyman: You may remember a certain little cult phenomenon known as ECW, and, oh yes, this is that promotion’s world title. This title cannot be known as the ECW title any more, so that is why I have re-named this belt the Extreme Rules Championship, or ERC. This title will be fought for in just that fashion too, in the rules of ECW. And since this is ECW’s former title, only one man can truly be its first holder on Paul Heyman’s Smackdown…And that man is…Rhyno!

    Rhyno’s music hits.

    Cole: Rhyno?

    Tazz: Well, Rhyno was the last ever ECW champion Cole, it makes sense.

    Cole: Rhyno was just fired from RAW because of a vicious attack that he dished out on Tajiri after losing their title match against La Resistance at Summerslam. I realize that since Eric Bischoff fired him, Rhyno’s a free agent, but why does Heyman want him here?

    Rhyno comes out to a mixed reaction. The Hamilton crowd is obviously filled with some smarks. Half the crowd is booing, while the rest is chanting E-C-DUB. Rhyno climbs into the ring and accepts his title.

    Heyman: You see, the main difference between Smackdown and RAW is that while Eric Bischoff fires monsters, we tame them here. This man was the last ECW champion, and is now the rightful first Extreme Rules Champion. Rhyno?

    Rhyno takes the mic from Paul, but is stopped before he can make a speech by the arena darkening, with a single spotlight on the ring and one on the ramp. ‘“The neverending saga in ... the overall story of the loner, the slacker, the tortured soul known as Raven, who craves acceptance yet destroys it once he achieves it."- Paul Heyman’ comes up on the titantron. A perfectly black bird descends on the ring towards Heyman and Rhyno. They shoo it away, and check the titantron once again to see ‘RAVEN. RHYNO. NEXT WEEK. ERC.’ The light returns which prompts Rhyno and Heyman to beat a hasty retreat.

    85%

    Cole: A message from Raven?

    Tazz: Raven hasn’t been a part of the WWE for years though. What does this mean Cole?

    Cole: Well, I suppose that we’ll find out next week. Wait a sec…I’m getting word that Josh Matthews is backstage with a surprise addition to the Smackdown roster…Josh?

    Josh Matthews is backstage with none other than Kane! OMG!!!!111111oneoneoneoneoneoneoneone

    Josh: Kane, at Summerslam, you were forced to leave RAW because you lost to Matt Hardy in a Love Her or Leave Her match. What are you doing on Smackdown?

    Kane gets into the classic “I’m big and intimidating compared to the interviewer” pose.

    Kane: I’m here for one reason and one reason only. I am here to taste blood.

    Kane walks off, quite angry. The scene cuts to a commercial break.

    76%

    MATCH—Rhyno © Versus Funaki

    WWE Extreme Rules Championship

    Poor Funaki…you’re pushed as a backstage reporter, and you return to wrestling for an obvious squash match. Oh well. This one started off pretty normal as squash matches go. Funaki gets an early lead, hitting Rhyno with a few dropkicks. After the third, he goes for the vertical suplex. Always gotta go for something you can’t hit, eh Funaki? Of course, Rhyno counters it and begins the domination path. He throws Funaki into the post, sternum first. Funaki comes out of it, dazed, and is hit with a german suplex. Rhyno then decides it’s time for some hardware. Grabbing a table, Rhyno props his new toy nicely in the corner. He teases the Gore, and charges as Funaki stands up and turns around. Funaki gets out of the way, and Rhyno smashes into the table! As Rhyno stumbles out, Funaki takes the opportunity to use a schoolboy style pin, with his feet on the ropes. Legal, effective, but not so effective for Funaki. Rhyno kicks out with ease. Funaki starts to go for a quick offence, but is caught in the Gore, which was greeted by some E-C-DUB Chants. Easy title defense tonight Mr. Rhyno, but next week…oh my.

    Winner: Rhyno by pinfall.

    63%

    Paul Heyman is in his office with the Dudley Boyz and their shiny new titles. The scene seems to be breaking right into mid conversation.

    Bubba Ray: Wait a second Paul. You say that I and D-Von have to defend these titles just five days after we won them, against the chumps that we beat already? I just don’t get it.

    D-Von: Yeah Paul. If they couldn’t beat us Sunday, then how could they beat us tonight?

    Paul: Gentlemen, gentlemen. There’s a simple explanation for all of your worries. Paul London and Billy Kidman have an automatic rematch clause in their contracts, which states that as long as you two hold these titles, they are considered the number one contenders for them. But tonight, much like with Mr. Cena, they are in a win or lose situation. If they lose the title match tonight, their rematch clause is void.

    Bubba Ray: Ingenious.

    The Dudleys give high fives and leave Heyman’s office.

    Cole: The Dudley Boyz versus Billy Kidman and Paul London is next!

    92%

    Everyone’s favorite part of the show, the commercial break!!

    MATCH--The Dudley Boys © Versus Kidman and London

    WWE Tag Titles

    Just when you thought that the WWE was gonna give these two a decent push. Allow us all to pray that this victory for the Dudleys is simply a way to give them a push as the 19 time tag champs. Bubba Ray and London start this one off, with the action trading back and forth between the two. London hits a drop kick which sends Bubba reeling and prompts him to make the tag to D-Von. Enter D-Von who took it to London, hitting big moves. After a swinging neck breaker, D-Von made the pin, which brought up a deja-vu moment from Summerslam, with Kidman coming in to help, which helped those damned Dudleys hit the Wazzup Headbutt while the referee told Kidman to hold the tag rope. Tag in to Bubba who motions for the 3D. Those plans are thwarted quickly as London hits a tornado DDT on D-Von, and a Hurracanrana on Bubba Ray. Kidman gets the hot tag in, and hits fast clotheslines on the Dudleys. London tackles D-Von over the top rope, and Kidman positions Bubba Ray for the Shooting Star Press, and hits it. An almost inevitable three count is thwarted by Paul Heyman, who attacks Kidman with a baseball bat while the ref is busy trying to bring the other halves of the teams to their corners. Heyman puts Bubba Ray on top of Kidman and gets the ref’s attention. Bubba Ray makes the pin for a successful title defense.

    Winners: The Dudley Boyz

    Cole: The Dudleys just won with the assist from Paul Heyman!

    Heyman plays at the idea that he plans to hit Kidman with the bat again, until none other than Spike Dudley makes his way to the ring, chair in hand. Woohoo! Clear the ring Spike, clear the ring! Mr. Heyman gets a mic and vocalizes himself on the ramp.

    Heyman: Spike, you just made a mistake. Next week, the Dudley Boyz, the same men who have tried to befriend you for weeks will team up with a returning Sean O’Haire, and their opponents will be the three man team of London, Kidman and Spike Dudley. You will pay for this incident Spike, you will pay in full.

    Cole: Oh my God! Not only have we learned that Sean O’Haire will make his return to Smackdown! Next week, but he will be teaming with the Dudleys against the three men in the ring right now!

    Tazz: How in god’s name are they going to be able to compete with those men? The combined weight of the Dudleys and O’Haire must triple the combined weight of London, Kidman and Spike!

    Cole: I dunno partner, but I do know that Kenzo Suzuki versus Charlie Hass is next!

    69%

    The Prophecy

    A video airs for Sean O’Haire to the tune of AFI’s Silver and Cold. The Lyrics are in bold, while what is happening is in normal text.

    I...I came here by day

    Sean O’Haire is shown, looking very green, in his WCW debut

    But I left here in darkness

    O’Haire and Piper smash a coconut over Rikishi’s head.

    And found you, found you on the way

    An image of Heyman slowly fades through, him laughing.

    Now...it is silver and silent…It is silver and cold

    Sean O’Haire comes back into view, hands in prayer.

    You in somber resplendence...I hold.

    Everything fades out slowly, to a completely black screen except for white writing which spells out the following:

    Sean O’Haire returns 8.26.2004

    Be ready.

    63%

    MATCH—Charlie Hass versus Kenzo Suzuki

    I’ll keep this obvious part short. HASS. CARRIED. SUZUKI. Pretty simple, eh? The match started off with a test of strength, which was won by Suzuki, but with a quick go-behind, Hass gained control in the early goings. Charlie hits a couple of quick suplexes which gains him a couple of quick two counts. After a “distraction” from Hiroki, Suzuki began to assault Hass. After a few moves that were quite taxing to Hass’s lower back, Suzuki locks in a simple, yet effective abdominal stretch. Hass powers out and goes to a leg with a half boston crab. He quickly switches into the Hass of Pain for the submission win.

    Winner: Charlie Hass

    63%

    Commercial Break

    Match: Rob Van Dam © vs Booker T vs Rene Dupree vs John Cena

    WWE United States Championship

    If Cena does not win he will be fired

    Egos were flaring the most in this match, with some pretty funny spots. Cena knocks out Booker T and goes for the Five Knuckle Shuffle, only to be closelined by Dupree, who begins to go for his “I am a Frenchman dance”, which was promptly stopped by RVD, who did the Rolling Thunder on all of them. Then going for the Five Star Frog splash on Cena, RVD was Book-Ended out to the floor. Booker then went for a top rope clothesline on Dupree, to only get dropkicked in mid air. While the three others were recuperating, Cena began to pump it up. Dupree came after him and was met with a kick to the gut and an F-U! Cena makes the cover, for three!!!

    Paul Heyman’s music hits instead of Cena’s.

    Heyman: Hold on a minute there Ref, hold on!

    A chorus of asshole chants start, but Heyman speaks above it.

    Heyman: Cena, you may’ve just pinned Rene Dupree, but that was simply the first fall. You see Cena, you are now in an elimination rules match for the United States Title, with competitors Booker T and Rob Van Dam. Ring the bell!

    Up from behind comes Booker T with a school boy style roll up! He grabs the tights and has his feet on the ropes! Cena is eliminated. Cena rolls out of the ring, brushing his shoulder off, very pissed off when it hits him. He throws up the Word Life sign to the fans who give a Cena chant in return. Cena walks away.

    As Booker T celebrates having basically fired John Cena, RVD was ready on the top rope and hit him with an extended leg. Van Dam helps Booker up and whips him into the corner. He hits Book with two shoulders and then does a backflip and hits a running third. Booker T falls out of the corner in perfect positioning for Van Dam’s next move, the Five Star Frogsplash! Van Dam rolls back over and makes a pin for three!

    Winner: Rob Van Dam

    71%

    Cole: An impressive win for RVD, but a damn shame that Cena lost his job that way!

    Tazz: Well, Cena’s warning from Heyman was there, but he just couldn’t rise above the challenge Cole.

    Cole: Cena, as well as the rest of the competitors in that match were un-aware that it was an elimination match, and for that matter Booker T had cheated!

    Tazz: Can’t call what you can’t see.

    Is JBL ready for The Dark Days?

    Backstage with a microphone is John Bradshaw Layfield. Wearing his usual phony grin and cowboy/rich guy outfit, JBL obviously has an agenda.

    JBL: At Summerslam, a robbery occurred. You see, I, John Bradshaw Layfield, Smackdown’s greatest investment, lost the WWE Title to a man who is wearing clothes from thirteen years ago. So tonight, JBL will be taking The Undertaker on in a one on one match so that I can take back what is rightfully mine. Does anybody doubt that I can do this?

    Wow…a pop during a JBL interview.

    JBL: I don’t think so. I will take my title back tonight fair and square!

    Cole: JBL, Taker! It’s next!

    75%

    That final commercial break!

    MAIN EVENT MATCH: The Undertaker © versus John Bradshaw Layfield

    WWE Title

    Do you know how I spell squash match? JBL vs Taker. It was a wild brawl the whole way through *coughtwominutestopscough*, until Taker hit “Old School.” Bradshaw was then lifted up by the throat and chokeslammed back down, but that wasn’t enough, as UT took JBL for the Tombstone. Taker crosses the arms and makes the cover.

    A pyro goes off, and “Slow Chemical” by Finger Eleven starts up. Taker isn’t at all wary.

    Cole: Oh my!

    Tazz: It’s Kane!

    Kane rushes the ring, and the two brothers begin to fight. Trading punches for a while, both men go for the chokeslam at the same time. Kane overpowers Taker and hits his move first. He then goes to the outside to retrieve the WWE title. He brings it in ring, and is shouting at Taker that he’ll pay for something in blood. He then positions the title and does the slow throat cut that Taker’s famous for. He picks up Undertaker and tombstones him on the title. Smackdown! goes off the air, with Kane standing tall above Undertaker, making the pyro go off.

    72%

    Overall Rating: 71%

    TV Rating: 5.92

    Attendance: 7520

    Best match: Taker VS JBL (72%)

    Worst Match: Haas VS Suzuki (59%)

    Best Segment: The Dudley Boyz converse with Paul Heyman (92%)

    Worst Segment: Sean O'Haire tease video (63%)

  17. WWE: For Better, or Worse

    in The Dome Retro Room

    Posted

    Oh yes, it's a Smackdown! preview.

    user posted image

    THE ERA OF PAUL HEYMAN ONCE AGAIN!

    August 19, 2004

    At Summerslam Kurt Angle and Luther Reigns took on John Cena and Latino Heat, and lost not only the match, but he also lost his job as General Manager to Paul E. Heyman!

    Heyman made his presence known as soon as he was on the job, firing Angle, Guerrero and Reigns! Being the only person not to lose his job, John Cena must be hanging on to his contract by a thread. Time will only tell as to how long Heyman decides to keep Cena's job.

    John Bradshaw Layfield will be in the building to address the new WWE Champion, The Undertaker! An era of Darkness started at Summerslam, and it will undoubtedly be unleashed on Thursday.

    Charlie Haas is scheduled to take on Kenzo Suzuki in one on one action!

    All this and much more this Thursday night (8/7 CT) when UPN presents SmackDown!

    I hope to have Smackdown! up later on today. Stupid me didn't copy down the Match Qualities or Crowd Reactions for SD! or Velocity, so you'll be going without those for this week.

    I also warn you, Stoker owns me in writing, so my results may seem substandard to his. I'm learning, mmkay?

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