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MyKILLv2.0

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  1. I"m just going to do the females....

    1. Liz Hurly As soon as I read this thread title, I thought of her. Don't ask me why, since I can't of anything she's done outside of Austin Powers, but I immedatley thought of her. She's very attractive, and charasmatic.

    2. Mandy Moore Admittingly, I am probably over rating her a tad, but I find her extremely attractive, and interesting in an industry that doesn't seem to have that many interesting people.

    3. Nicole Kidman I guess its the Aussie accent, but I have always found her to be extremely sexy.

    4. Reese Witherspoon I think one of the most under rated actreses of her day, and while she is attractive, isn't going to make any top ten list.

    5. Jenifer Love Hewitt If talent had anything to do with it, she wouldn't make the top 1 million, but she is sexy.

  2. This diary has really “evolved” from its inception to this point, and along the way has take a few sharp turns both in presentation and in product substance. What I decided to do was do a recap of the first two months, so that readers wouldn’t have to read through two months of shows to know what is going on if they have never read the diary before, and for those who have read the diary, they would be able to be 'reminded' of what happened, since the diary did take a month off. Anywho, here is the recap of the first two months…

    January

    • John Cena and Umaga fought over the WWE Championship. Umaga was undefeated at this point in his career, and appeared to be unstoppable, even to the WWE Champion. Umaga scored a DQ victory over Cena early in the month.
    • After suffering a career ending knee injury during a match with the spirit squad, Triple H was named Raw’s President. He quickly made it very clear that his first goal was to give the Raw Brand a more “respectable” champion.
    • Dave Batista would continue to do battle with the dysfunctional “Kingdom”. During the month, Booker T defeated Fit Finlay to become the number one contender, however during the contract signing, Finlay attacked both men, leaving new Smackdown GM Paul Heyman, no choice but to declare the match at the Royal Rumble a triple threat match!
    • CM Punk and Chris Benoit would do battle on Smackdown during a Best of Five series. Chris Benoit took an early 2-0 lead in the series, and it appeared that Punk had no answer for Benoit’s dreaded Crossface. However that all changed after receiving advice from Maria, Punk was able to reverse the Crossface on two separate occasions and even up the series at 2-2, heading into the Royal Rumble.
    • Carlito won the Intercontinental Championship from Jeff Hardy during the month. However, Johnny Nitro had already won a number one contender’s match. However, Nitro was determined to get the next shot at the title, and interfered in the Hardy/Carlito rematch. Carlito then granted Hardy a rematch at the Royal Rumble, however those plans were voided when Nitro injured Hardy the week before the Royal Rumble, leaving Carlito no choice, but to give Nitro a shot at the title… but with a stipulation. If Carlito won, Melina would have to shave her head!
    • Edge and Randy Orton continued to team up despite both claiming that not only were they going to win the Rumble, but they both wanted to do it from the first spot. Tensions grew throughout the month, and Triple H finally made a match between the WWE Tag Team Champions at the Royal Rumble, where the winner would be the first entrant into the Rumble.
    • The star of Gregory Helms continued to grow, as he defeated challenger after challenger for his Cruiserweight Championship belt. During the month, Helms would do battle with Matt Hardy, who was experiencing a blissful personal life now that his relationship with Ashley Massaro had gone public. However his world came tumbling down once more when Ashley turned her back on Hardy, and allied herself with Helms, costing Hardy the CW title along the way.
    • Mickie James introduced us to her new real life boyfriend, DeShaun Christian. D-S-C seemed to bring Mickie good luck, as she continued to retain her Diva’s Championship, despite the best efforts of Victoria and her “man toy” Stevie Richards.

      Royal Rumble

    • Randy Orton would win the Royal Rumble, though not without controversy. It appears that Edge was well on his way to winning the Rumble after leveling Orton with his patented Spear, however he quickly found himself tossed out of the ring by none other then former best friend, Christian Cage! Orton would win the Rumble by default, with Cage making an impact for the ages.
    • Dave Batista, Fit Finlay, and Booker T would do battle in an epic triple threat match, that saw all three of the participants nearly win the match. The ending of the match came after Batista disposed of Finlay, and appeared to be well on his way to powerbombing Booker, when he would pass out from blood loss. Booker would land on top of Batista and win the World Championship, for a SEVENTH time.
    • John Cena and Umaga would do battle in a NO DQ match. Umaga was a beast throughout the match, but it appeared that the WWE Champion was about to finish the match, when Triple H revealed his plan to ensure that Cena would not leave the WWE Champion. He revealed his new “Enforce of the Game”, The Big Show! Show would make his way down to the ring, only to be cut off by Ric Flair! This would give Cena enough time to finish off Umaga, and retain the WWE Championship!
    • Chris Benoit and CM Punk blew off the roof in an epic conclusion to their best of 5 series, and for the third time, Punk was able to reverse the Crossface, but this time, Benoit reversed the Reversal! However Punk was able to reverse the reversal, of the reversal… [Whew!], and secure the United States Championship!
    • Carlito and Johnny Nitro would do battle for the Intercontinental Championship. The two men would battle it out for nearly half an hour, as neither man wanted to lose, however in the end Carlito would retain the IC Championship, thus forcing Melina to shave her head the following night on Raw!
    • Randy Orton and Edge would do battle for the number one slot in the Rumble. The two men would lay it all on the line, attempting to win at all cost, despite all but ending their partnership. In the end, Orton was able to hit the RKO, but in a surprising twist of events, allowed Edge to cover him, and gave Edge the victory. Orton said later, that he had a change of heart, and decided to enter the Rumble at a different spot other then 1.
    • Mick Foley would come down to the ring and say that he was looking for another challenger for Wrestlemania 23! Out marched the Cruiserweight Champion… who had successful defended his title earlier the evening against Rey Mysterio. Helms accepted Foley’s challenge, while belittling him in the process. The Texas crowd would explode when Steve Austin made his way out onto the scene, to stand up for Foley, ending up delivering a stunner to the self proclaimed “No Gimmick Superstar”.

      -After the Royal Rumble, WWE received news that Smackdown has been canceled, thus forcing the brands to merge one more time. This would take place in the middle of the month.-

      February

    • After failing to take the WWE Title off of John Cena at the Royal Rumble, the Game would wreck havoc on everything around him. He would first take out his frustrations on Ric Flair. Flair would face the “Enforcer of the Game”, Big Show in a No DQ match, a match that ended up putting Flair on the shelf after being brutally assaulted by Big Show and the Game. Triple H would then turn his attention back to John Cena, promising that Cena would not leave Saturday Night Main Event with the WWE Championship!
    • Edge demanded answers from Christian Cage, which is finally got. Christian claimed that Edge left him behind, after Cage carried him for so long. Just before things got really heated, Triple H stepped in and made a deal with the both of them. He would not only give each of them a shot at one another, but a shot at the WWE Championship as well! However if they failed… they would face the same fate as Ric Flair!
    • After coming to Raw, Triple H gave his “Enforcer” a gift, for being such a loyal member. He gave him the first shot at the World Championship, however things did not turn out the way he planned when the former World Champion, Dave Batista returned to the WWE! Not only did he make it clear that he wanted his rematch for the World Title, but he made it even more crystal clear that he wanted to extract revenge against the man who put his mentor, Ric Flair, on the shelf.
    • Gregory Helms and Ashley Massaro continued their winning ways while coming to Raw, and seemed to always be one step ahead of Mick Foley, even tricking him into putting up his career at SNME. However that all changed when new Raw General Manager, Paul Heyman made a swerve, not allowing Steve Austin to be Mick’s partner, but rather allowing him to be the special guest REF for the match. Foley then said he didn’t have to scramble for a partner because he had a backup in mind… THE ROCK! The three legends laid a beating to the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’, and his new “Problem Solver” Tyson Tomko.
    • Carlito would force Melina to go through with the process of shaving off her hair, however at the last moment, he cut a deal. If she agreed to be his slave until Wrestlemania, she could keep her hair. She reluctantly agreed, which sent Johnny Nitro into a losing streak without his Melina. Things would not turn out so well though for Carlito, because Melina wasn’t a very good slave, when she cost him a ‘Gold Rush’ match against Shelton Benjamin.
    • At the Royal Rumble, the WWE laid witness to the debut of a new tag team… the Konfederacy. These two outspoken gentlemen from the south made no hesitation in making an impact, winning the Tag Team Championships in their first month. However one of the brothers, AG Wright, seemed to be consumed with ending the inter-racial relationship of Mickie James and DeShaun Christian. He finally succeeded at the end of the month, after pressuring James with physical threats against DSC.
    • Ken Kennedy made an off handed joke about Matt Hardy during the month, saying that if he didn’t have a girlfriend to steal, what was the point of wrestling him? Hardy took offense to this, and the two battled it out all month long.

    During the month, it was also decided that even though the brands had merged, Paul Heyman would be retained as General Manager, and work under the Raw President Triple H. McMahon made it clear that Triple H was the President of Raw, handling all of the major decisions of the show, while Paul Heyman would handle the day to day responsibilities of Raw as General Manager.

    Saturday Night Main Event will be posted tommorrow night.
  3. After a month in hiatus I have brought back my WWE2007 diary. I have also made a slight addition to my shows, thus being the addition of JR's Commentary after every match/segment. I didn't feel like I was getting what I needed too out of the simple commentary interaction, so I went with this. Lets see how it works.

    Feb14.jpg

    Monday Night Raw Febuary 14, 2007 from San Diego, CA

    [- "The Champ Is Still HeRRE!" -]

    Word Life!

    Its Just A Matter of Thuganomics!

    -The arena explodes into bedlam has half the arena goes crazy with respect over the WWE Champion, while the other half goes bonkers with hatred over the WWE Champion. Through both sides of the spectrum, emerges the WWE Champion, John Cena. The Champ raises the belt high in the air, then shows off his throwback baby blue #21 LT jersey as he marches down to the ring. He rolls into the ring, and begins to pace back and forth, as the crowd’s reaction dies down.-

    John Cena: So Hunter doesn’t like me…

    -Pause.-

    John Cena: Well that’s ok, because the truth is I really don’t like that son of a bitch either!

    -Loud pop for Cena as the champ gets a little more rowdy.-

    John Cena: But unless I’m mistaking our relationship, we aren’t dating. We don’t have to like one another. You can hate me. I can hate you, but as long as I am carrying this belt, it looks like we are stuck with one another!

    -Cena holds up the spinner WWE Championship belt. The crowd gives off their mixture of boos and cheers. Cena pauses for a little bit, then continues to speak.-

    John Cena: The ironic thing is Hunter… you and me, we are a lot like. Deep down, we really don’t give a damn about what people think about us. True, you do go way out of your way to ensure people hate your guts, but when it comes right down to it, whether people cheer us, or boo our asses out of the arena, we are still only in this industry for one reason and that is the WWE Championship! We both judge ourselves on how we are as champions, and whether you or any of these people like to admit it or not, over the past two years, I have been the best damn wrestler alive!

    -Cena raises the Championship belt up towards the cameara. The negative portion of the crowd erupts into boos as Cena mentions his name and “best wrestler alive” in the same sentence-

    John Cena: Now I know what you are thinking. I can already hear the cracks about how I only know three wrestling moves, and you know what Hunter? Yo’ ass may not that wrong, but whether I know three moves, or three million the fact remains over the past two years, I’ve beaten guys who claim to be the “King of World”, the “Greatest Professional Wrestler Alive”, who claimed to be ‘Rated R’, ‘Samoan Bulldozers” and one cocky son of a gun who claimed he was the ‘King of Kings’, and you know what they all had in common? Every single Monday Night after we went grill to grill, whether it was Umaga, Jericho, Angle, or even you.. every single Raw after we faced for the final time, I came out to this ring, raised my title in the air and proclaimed that the CHAMP IS STILL HERRE!!!!

    -Cena raises the title high in the air, which brings out a mixed reaction once more from the arena.-

    John Cena: And now, you want to claim that you are going to take the belt away from me? You act like this is something new! Since the moment I won this damn thing, I’ve had guys trying to take this belt from me! It seems everyone wants to take this belt off me, wrestlers, management, hell even half these damn fans want to take the belt from me! Time after time they’ve tried, and time after time, they’ve FAILED! So Hunter, give me your best shot. Give me Edge! Give me Christian! Hell send the Big Show down to the ring as well, but bet your bottom dollar that come next Monday night, when Raw kicks off, I’m going to be standing in the middle of this ring with MY WWE Championship title belt held high, saying one more time that the CHAMP IS STILL HERRE!

    -Cena throws up the ‘Word Life’ sign and then raises the belt high in the air, as the fans give their take on whether they like or dislike Cena.-

    J-R's Commentary: Whether you like him or hate him, and I personally like him, but everyone has to admit that to this point John Cena has been one hell of a WWE Champion, and it wouldn’t shock this “Boomer Sooner” one bit if he walked out with the WWE Title after the triple threat match this Saturday against Edge and Christian.

    Tag Team Match

    'The No Gimmick Superstar' Greg Helms & 'The Problem Solver' Tyson Tomko vs The Hardy Boyz

    OOOOOHHHHHH YEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

    The crowd explodes as Matt Hardy and brother Jeff Hardy step out onto the stage. For the first time in a long time, the Hardy Boyz are reunited, and the crowd is loving every moment of it. Jeff and Matt both seem to be as excited as everyone in the arena, as they jump around wild with excitement. However their excitement is brought to an abrupt halt with the sounds of…

    MAKE ME A…

    SUPERSTAR!

    Gregory Helms emerges from the back along with his ‘Problem Solver’ Tyson Tomko, and the Princess of Punk, Ashley Massaro. J-R notes the shirt that Ashley is wearing, which has the words ‘Remember Me?’ written along the front. The King makes a remark about how J-R is probably the only man in the arena to actually read the words, despite everyone looking at the shirt. Helms and Tomko roll into the ring, and go right after the Hardyz who are not caught off guard one bit by the early attack. Jeff and Matt fight back, Matt sending Helms knocked the corner with a strong lariat. Jeff and Tomko begin to exchange punches, with Tomko easily winning this battle, however Matt Hardy is able to explode from the side with a clothesline that rocks the big man. Both Hardy Boyz bounce off the ropes, and connect with a double dropkick to Tomko, sending him falling out of the ring. Jeff Hardy exits the ring, and lets Matt Hardy begin the match against once rival, Gregory Helms. Helms fights up to his feet, but Hardy squashes him in the corner, as soon as the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’ reaches his feet. J-R begins to hype Helms’ match this Saturday at ‘SNME’, and spells out the stakes of the match, which are if Mick Foley loses, he must retire! Hardy controls the match from the outset sending Gregory Helms into the ropes, then executing a picture perfect back elbow, that catches Greg square! Matt Hardy grabs Helms, and pulls him up to his feet, before bodyslamming him back down to the canvas. Matt climbs up to the middle rope. With Gregory Helms knocked out on the canvas, Matt Hardy sets up for his patented leg drop from middle rope. He lets out a scream and leaps off, however Tyson Tomko reaches in from the apron, grabbing Hardy by the throat and slamming him to the canvas with a modified chokeslam! Hardy bounces off the canvas hard, as Helms begins to move. The No Gimmick Superstar crawls over and tags in his ‘Problem Solver’. Tomko enters the ring, immediately giving a stomp to the gut of Hardy. Tomko then proceeds to pull Hardy up by the hair, before nailing his own version of ‘Snake Eyes’! Hardy bounces off the top turnbuckle, totally dazed. Tomko delivers a kick to the gut, then after Hardy is slumped over, he throws his head between his own legs. POWERBOMB! Hardy is rocked as the ‘Problem Solver’ rocks the former Tag Team Champion with a mega powerbomb! Tomko goes for the cover, but Helms screams that he wants the cover. Tomko reluctantly obeys, tagging in Helms. 1-2-KICKOUT! Helms can’t believe Hardy kicked out! Helms just gives a deer in the headlights glare at the ref, not believing that Hardy managed to kick out. Gregory Helms climbs up to his feet, and walks over to the ropes, still stunned at Hardy’s resiliency. Tomko offers to tag back in, but Helms shakes him off. After getting a few words of encouragement from both Ashley and Tomko, Helms goes back to work on Hardy. He grabs Matt by the hair, and pulls him up. However Hardy explodes by grabbing Helms by the head, and executing that Hardy jawbreaker! The crowd explodes as the “No Gimmick Superstar’ crashes to the canvas, and Matt Hardy and the Hardy Boyz seem to have one more life left in them! Hardy pulls himself to his feet, and notices that Helms is doing the same. Jeff is pleading for a tag, but Matt stays in the match. Matt Hardy waits for Helms to climb back up to his feet. Greg finally reaches his feet, but is greeted by a powerful clothesline from Matt Hardy that sends the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’ crashing to the canvas. Hardy throws up the ‘V1’ sign in the air, as the fans eat it up. However Hardy’s attention is grabbed by the emergence of Ken Kennedy who has made his way out onto the entrance ramp. Kennedy is holding up a hand man sign that reads ‘IF YOU ARE DATING MATT HARDY, PLEASE CALL 1-888-KEN-4YOU’. Hardy points at Kennedy and begins to tell him to get lost. His brother obviously has had enough of this, and begins to head up the entrance ramp. Kennedy tells Jeff to back off, telling him that ‘family members are not allowed to call’. Matt has his attention focused squarely on Kennedy, and never sees Tyson Tomko exploding from behind, drilling Hardy in the back of the head with a boot to the skull! Hardy crashes to the canvas, motionless. The Problem Solver pulls Helms on top of Hardy, as the ref begins to make the count. Jeff soon realizes what is happening and charges down the ramp to make the save! 1-2-3! Too Late! Jeff isn’t able to save his brother, and Gregory Helms picks up the victory! Kennedy laughs from the top of the entrance ramp, as Tomko pulls his leader out of the ring, and helps him to the back, as Ashley walks a few steps behind Tomko carrying her man’s WWE Cruiserweight Championship

    Gregory Helms & Tyson Tomko DEFEAT The Hardy Boyz

    J-R's Commentary: Oh brother! What a screw job the Hardy Boyz just received at the hands of Ken Kennedy! I can’t wait until Matt Hardy gets his hands on Kennedy, but I’ll tell you what I’m not loving! The fact that if Helms and Tomko can do this on Saturday, our good old friend Mick Foley won’t have a job anymore. Don’t get me wrong folks, I love and trust Mick, but there is something about this match that rumbles in my belly.

    [- 'There Really Never Is a WRIGHT Time to Say Goodbye, Is There?' -]

    The scene fades backstage in the Diva Champ’s locker room, where we see DeShaun Christian along with girlfriend Mickie James. The two seem to be enjoying each others company when all of a sudden James’ cell goes off. DSC goes to answer it, but hands it to Mickie.

    DeShaun Christian: Hello? Sister James? Mickie doesn’t have any brothers. Who’se…

    -Mickie jerks the phone out DeShaun’s grip.-

    Mickie James: Leave me alone!

    -Mickie hangs up the phone, as you can tell that she is obviously shaken.-

    DeShaun Christian: Who was that?

    Mickie James: DeShaun… I think its best if you and I don’t see each other anymore.

    DeShaun Christian: What! Where is this coming from? I thought we were….

    Mickie James: Its not you, It’s me. I just… I just don’t think we are right for one another.

    DeShaun Christian: I don’t understand. What happened?

    Mickie James: Please, just go

    -DeShaun stands up, totally hurt and confused. He walks out finally, and as soon as DeShaun leaves the room, Mickie bursts into tears, throwing the phone at the wall.-

    J-R's Commentary: I got a feeling in my gut, I know who was on the other end of that phone, and if I’m wright… I mean right, I hope that son of a gun burns for this!

    Johnny Nitro vs Umaga

    -Lightbulbs begin to flash all over the entrance ramp...-

    **FLASH**--**FLASH**--**FLASH**

    Nitro emerges from the back as the red carpet rolls down the entrance ramp. Nitro stands at the top of the entrance ramp, trying to look his normal smug self, however it is obvious that he isn’t the same without Melina at his side. Nitro charges down the ramp and slides into the ring, doing his normal sexy pose. However someone forgot to tell Umaga that you were suppose to give him a five second pose, because as soon as Nitro got into position for the pose, Umaga charged in, dropping a leg drop on Nitro! Umaga stays on the attack, and begins to choke Nitro while he is on the canvas. Estrada screams out from the apron to GET HIM! Umaga grabs Nitro and pulls him up to his feet, before unleashing the gates of hell on Nitro with a hard chop that sends him staggering backwards into the corner. Umaga backpedals a few steps before charging at Nitro delivering a BODY SQUASH! Nitro falls down into the corner after being sandwiched. Umaga once more backpedals, then charges delivering his version of the face wash right to the face of Nitro, who rolls over in pain. Umaga signals for the ending to the match. The crowd rises to their feet anticipating Estrada ending it. He waits to let the crowd hype it some, before screaming… KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM! The crowd actually loves this, giving Estrada a nice pop. Umaga pulls Nitro by the foot to the middle of the ring. Umaga then walks over to the ropes, and climbs up to the middle rope. Umaga goes crazy, then leaps off connecting with a mid-rope body squash! 1-2-3! Umaga Wins! The crowd actually gives him a nice little pop, which is odd to hear.

    Umaga DEFEATS Johnny Nitro

    J-R's Commentary: I gained two things from watching this match. First off, Johnny Nitro isn't the same wrestler, he normally is with Melina, and secondly Umaga has figured out that he doesn't get paid by the hour, because that is two complete dominations in two straight weeks! What I can't figure out is why are people cheering for him?

    [- "Who Will Have the EDGE at SNME?" -]

    -The scene fades backstage where we find the ‘Rated R Superstar’ standing next to the loveable Maria. Edge has a look in his eyes that tells the whole story. He is always someone who is focused, but there is a hunger in his eyes that we haven’t seen in a long time. Maria waits for a few moments, then begins to ask away.-

    Maria: With me at this time is the man who will face both Christian Cage and John Cena at Saturday Night Main Event for the WWE Champion, Edge!

    -A Pop from inside the arena can be heard.-

    Maria: Edge, last week Christian Cage finally spoke out about why he came back and cost you the Rumble. He said some pretty hurtful things. What do you have to say to him?

    Edge: Maria, Christian Cage said lots of things last week in that ring. Most of them, I’ll agree with. The fact is I am a terrible friend. I have cheated on my wife. I have stolen my best friend’s girl. I have turned by back on guys who I considered friends, for my own benefit. I am a terrible friend, but at Saturday Night Main Event, we aren’t participating in a friendship contest. We are competiting in a WRESTLING contest, and whether little ‘Captain Charisma” wants to admit it or not, I’m one of the most decorated wrestlers of my generation! I’m a former two-time WWE Champion. I’m a former multi time Intercontinental Champion, former multi time tag team champion! I’ve won King of the Ring. I’ve headlined pay per views on all three brands in the WWE. Argue over my qualities as a friend all you want, but no one can dispute the fact that I am one HELL of a wrestler, and at Saturday Night Main Event, I plan on killing two birds with one stone…

    -Pause.-

    Edge: Because at Saturday Night Main Event, I am going to put to rest my former supposed ‘Best Friend’, Christian Cage, and capture the WWE Championship all at the same time. So Christian Cage, go get your most fancy entrance attire you have in that large closet of yours, and make sure you look nice when you come down to the ring, for all of your Peeps, because after that bell rings, I am going to make you look like the pathetic excuse for a wrestler that you are!

    -Edge storms off as Maria just looks in the camera with that loveable, clueless expression.-

    J-R's Commentary: Normally I don’t care much for this son of a gun, but even the late Ray Charles could see the buring in Edge’s eyes during that promo. I know one thing, I wouldn’t want to be Christian Cage come this Saturday.

    [- "Hollywood, The Land of Big Houses, Movie Stars, and Potato Sacks? " -]

    -The scene fades backstage where we see Melina consoling Nitro after the beating he received at the hands of Umaga earlier in the night. Melina is rubbing the shoulder of Nitro when Carlito walks into the room.-

    Carlito: Johnny, scram. I need to talk to Melina.

    Johnny Nitro: Carlito, this has gone far enough. This beef is between me and you, just let Melina come back to me.

    Carlito: She can come back to you anytime she wants…

    Melina: Really?

    Carlito: Of course! Only thing is… you still gotta shave your head.

    -Melina’s expression turns from sudden shock and enjoyment, to discouragement and anger. She motions for Nitro to leave the room, to give her time to talk to Carlito. Nitro steps up to Carlito and the two exchange death stares for a long time, before Nitro finally walks out of the room.-

    Carlito: Yeah, scram Johnny! Go find Carlito some apple seeds!

    -Carlito cracks that cocky smirk of his, as he takes a huge bite from his apple. He turns back around towards Melina who has her hands on her hip, and giving Carlito a death stare.-

    Carlito: That Johnny Apple Seed, he a…. WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM! Last week, I had Shelton Benjamin right where I wanted, and then you… you…. You spray Carlito with that spray from behind your back. What the frick is wrong with you?

    Melina: Eh, stuff happens. It was an accident.

    Carlito: An accident! You sprayed me right in the eyes! Carlito hasn’t had that much gunk on his face since Trish…..

    -Long Pause.-

    Carlito: Well… in a long time!

    Melina: What do you want me to say?

    Carlito: I want you to say…. I want to say….

    Melina: What? That I’m sorry? Well I’m not. I hate you Carlito! I’m not down there because I like you. Remember, I…

    Carlito: You’re right. Maybe Carlito and you got off on the wrong foot. Maybe its my fault. So… I um… picked you up something.

    -Melina is caught totally off guard by this sudden change of expression. She gives Carlito a look of pure bewilderment as he begins to stutter as he hands her a large sack from “Macys”. Melina’s eyes widen as she reads what store it is from.-

    Melina: You got this for me?

    Carlito: Yeah.. Carlito’s been a jerk. I figured it was the least I could do. Maybe you could wear it next week in LA…, since you like to dress up and all that.

    Melina: Carlito! You shouldn’t have….. have….

    -Melina reaches into a bag and pulls out a large potato sack. Carlito’s expression changes back to his normal self, of pure cockness.-

    Melina: You got me a potato sack?

    Carlito: Yeah! I figure you could wear that next week during my match with Shelton.

    Melina: No way! Next week is LA! Movie Stars! Movie Producers! Paparazzi! Cameras! There is no way I am going to show up wearing a potato sack!

    Carlito: Well then you got a choice then mama… you either show up in a sack… or show up bald. The choice is yours… but if I were you, I would wear the sack, because bald chicks aren’t cool… they are cool at all.

    -Carlito gives Melina a flirtious wink then leaves the room, leaving Melina to stare blankly at the potato sack.-

    J-R's Commentary: Ha! Now that is reason enough for anyone to watch this Saturday, if only to see Melina in a potato sack! Now I know the good book probably says making a mockery out of another person isn’t the right thing, but this jezbel has had something like this coming for a long time. Good for you, Carlito!

    -2 on 1 Handicap Match-

    Bobby Lashley vs The Konfederacy

    WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    The Wright Brothers march down to the ring and are greeted by an entire arena booing the hell out of them. The brothers don’t seem to mind and make their way down to the ring, where AG feels the need to speak before their handicap match.

    AG WRIGHT: At the Royal Rumble, many people say that our debut was a failure, because neither me or Kodi won the event. Well I say that is bulljive! We have not have won the event, but we accomplished what we set out to do! We made sure that the person who won the match was… well lets just say one of acceptable color.

    -The crowd boos the hell out of him.-

    AG WRIGHT: We made sure that Bobby Lashley wasn’t the one who WON the rumble, so the way I view it, because of who DIDN’T win the Rumble, we achieved our mission! Tonight, we display our superiority when we face this geneticly manufactored black man, in a one on two match! By the way… what kind of name is Bobby? Isn’t his kind suppose to have a goofy name like DeShaun, or RaShaad, or…

    Apparently the former ECW Champion has heard enough because out onto the stage marches Bobby Lashley, who receives a hero’s welcome from the fans in the arena. The crowd begins to chant ‘LASHLEY-LASHLEY-LASHLEY’, as he marches down the ramp, eventually leaping up onto the apron in his classic fashion. As soon as he enters the ring, the Tag Team Champions explode with their two on one assault, both men attacking Lashley. This two on one attack however backfires, when Lashley is able to fend off both members, sending each stumbling backwards after reciving right hands to the face! Lashley makes his way towards Kodi, and delivers another shot to the face. However after doing so, he has his knee taken out from under him with a chop block from AG Wright! Lashley crashes to the canvas, grabbing his knee. The Tag Team Champions go to work on the injured leg of Bobby Lashley. AG lifts up the leg, then delivers a stiff kick to the soft part of the knee. Kodi adds in with a stomp to knee as well. AG then tells Kodi to take Lashley’s knee and place it on the bottom rope, to which his brother obeys. In an old school, Bret Hart move, AG leaps off the bottom rope and lands on top of Lashley’s knee, sending the crowd pouring boos into the ring. AG does his classic Bret Hart arms wide open pose, which brings even more boos into the ring. Kodi stays on the attack, pulling Lashley up to his feet, before laying into him with a stiff right hand that sends the former ECW Champion backwards into the ropes. Kodi explodes with a knee to the gut, which sends Lashley slumping over in pain, and gasping for breath. AG walks over and delivers a cocky, disrespectful slap to the back of the head of Lashley. He then tells his brother to back off, as he backpedals. He motions for Lashley to get up, and once he does he charges. Lashley sees him coming, and scoops him up, SPINEBUSTER! Lashley rolls up to his feet, as AG rolls out onto the floor. Kodi charges Lashley, who scoops up the other Wright Brother! Lashley dumps him over the top rope and onto the floor, right in front of AG! This match has gone on long enough for the Tag Team Champions liking. They exchange a few words on the outside, before Kodi slides into the ring. Lashley goes right after him, and the two powerhouses go toe to toe, exchaning right hands. Eventually Bobby Lashley wins this battle of strength, and whips Kodi into the ropes, but after he does, he is drilled in the face with the WWE Tag Team Championship belt! The ref calls for an ending to the match after he sees the blantant breaking of the rules. This doesn’t stop the assault on Lashley, who is now motionless on the canvas. The Wright Brothers begin to lay boot to skull, as they lay into Lashley. There appears to be no end in sight, when the arena is sent into absolute bedlam and out from the back explodes DeShaun Christian! DSC slides into the ring, As soon as the champs see this, they pull their fastest exit strategy, exiting the ring quickly. DSC stands over Lashely, daring either of the two men to re-enter the ring, before something catches his eye… the WWE Tag Team Championship belt. DSC picks up the belt, noticing Lashley’s blood on the plate. He holds it up towards the champions, daring them to come get it. The champs elect to leave the belt, and backpedal up the entrance ramp, as Lashley begins to make it way up to his feet.

    Bobby Lashley DEFEATS the Wright Brothers…Via DQ

    J-R's Commentary: I hate these two men, AG & Kodi Wright, and I can only hope that Paul Heyman makes a match at SNME between these four men, because I would love nothing more then to see Lashley and DeShaun Christian shut up these racists once and for all!

    [- "Making a Deal With the Devil Has Consequences? " -]

    -The scene fades backstage in the Big Show’s locker room. Big Show is getting tape up as the Raw President, Triple H is giving him some words of encouragement before his huge match with Booker T later tonight for the World Championship.-

    Triple H: Big Show, tonight is your night! Tonight, is the night that all of your loyalty to me is paid back. Tonight, you are going to walk down to that ring, and dismember Booker T… King Booker… whatever the hell he is calling himself now a days.

    -Big Show nods in agreement.-

    Triple H: You are going to tear him limb from limb, then after you beat him to a bloody pulp, you are going to lift him ten feet in the air, and drop him down through the canvas just like you did the Undertaker a long time ago! You are going to leave Booker T a bloody mess, just like you did Ric Flair! And when you leave, you are going to leave the World Champion! From there, you will go on to be the greatest World Champion in the history of professional wrestling! Bigger then Flair! Bigger then Sting! Bigger then Hogan! Bigger then them all! You are…

    Christian Cage: One big son of a bitch

    -Big Show and Hunter turn their heads around to see Christian Cage standing behind them. As soon as Cage’s face is shown, the arena burst out into eruptions of boos and jeers.-

    Christian Cage: No offense, Show.

    -Triple H turns his attention now towards Christian Cage, who seems to be at a loss for words.-

    Triple H: And what do you want?

    Christian Cage: Triple H I just wanted to thank you for giving me the opportunity this Saturday at Main Event. I assure you that not only will John Cena not walk out of the event with the title belt, but that it will be me walking into Raw the new WWE Champion.

    -Christian stares off to space, imagining him winning the WWE Championship. The crowd boos at the thought of this, however both are snapped back to reality when Triple H snatches Cage by the collar.-

    Triple H: Listen very closely… I told you this last week. I don’t like you. I didn’t give you a shot because you earned it. I gave it to you, because I wanted to accomplish a mission! That mission is simple! Defeat John Cena. You do that, your reward is being the WWE Champion. But if you fail… you will face my wraith…

    Christian Cage: Your wraith… I wouldn’t want to face that.

    Triple H: You fail, and you will, because if you or Edge do not walk out of Saturday Night Main Event with the WWE Championship, you will face the next World Champion… my Enforcer… Big Show, in a No DQ Match! And you’ve been around here long enough to know how those end…

    Christian Cage: Yeah… well don’t worry about that. Because next week on Raw, we are going to have a party… celebrating the new WWE Championship reign of CHRISTIAN CAGE! Thanks Again, Game. Show… you stay sexy now.

    -Christian gives that fake ‘player’ expression as he points towards the Big Show then walks off with his classic smirk. Show and Game watch him leave, both have expression of irration plastered all over their face.-

    J-R's Commentary: If I were Christian, I would make sure that he walks out of SNME with the WWE Title because I would rather re-marry one of my ex-wives then have to face the Big Show in a No DQ Match. We all know how that ends up.. and it ain't pretty at all folks!

    [- "Who Is Really Two Steps Ahead of Who?" -]

    -We return from a commercial break with the No Gimmick Superstar, Gregory Helms standing in the middle of the ring with his ‘Problem Solver’ Tyson Tomko and Princess of Punk, Ashley Massaro. The Cruiserweight Champ just stands in the middle of the ring looking out at the crowd, who is booing the hell out of him. Ashley puts her hand on her man’s shoulder and tells him not to listen. Helms nods his head but continues to look out at the crowd. After a long time, he looks back in the ring, where he adjusts the Cruiserweight Championship Belt, then pulls out a microphone.-

    Gregory Helms: Go ahead and boo me all you want. Hell, some of you may think I deserve it after what I did to Mick Foley last week. After all, I did take a former WWE Champion… a sure fire WWE Hall of Fame Member one day, Mick Foley, and I left him a beaten, bloodied mess, and if you want the god’s honest truth… I don’t regret one damn bit of it!

    -The fans erupt into a loud chorus of boos as J-R screams out how Gregory Helms is rotten to the core.-

    Gregory Helms: You see… there are certain points in a man’s life where he has to make a choice. There are certain moments that define him as a man, and last week was one of those weeks for the No Gimmick Superstar! Last week, I showed that I didn’t need to act like some superhero, or jump from rooftops to get people to notice me. Last week, I put the entire W-W-E on notice… Gregory Helms will not be over looked! Gregory Helms will be RESPECTED! Last week….

    SKREEEEEEEECH…..

    CRAAAAAAASH!!!!

    -The crowd erupts as Mick Foley steps out onto the entrance ramp along side Steve Austin. One look at the Hardcore Legend, and had you not seen what happen to him last week, you could have easily believed that he was in a car accident. His eyes are bloodied, his body is bruised, and with every step he makes towards the ring, you can see the pain plastered all over his face. Mick Foley finally joins the trio in the ring and stands in the middle of the ring, as Tomko and Helms stand toe to toe with the two wrestling Icons, Foley and Austin. Neither team backs down. -

    Mick Foley: Gregory Helms, last week when I came down during your match, I came down with every intention of teaching you a lesson. However, much to my own surprise, it was ME who was taught the lesson… unfortunately a very painful lesson that involved yours truly being thrown off the entrance ramp and through a table. However, as I awake long after Raw went off the air, and I stood up with blood still filling my eye cavities, every muscle in my body screaming out in pain, I had a feeling I hadn’t felt in a long time… and I gotta admit, I love that feeling!

    -The crowd goes nuts as that sick, sadistic smirk appears on the face of Mick Foley.-

    Mick Foley: So Mr. Helms, THANK YOU, for giving me just a taste of what I have been longing for so long! Thank You! However, I didn’t come down here to thank you, and join in the worshipping of the No Gimmick Superstar. No, you see I came down here to inform you of a slight change to our match at Saturday Night Main Event…..you see, you changed the date of our match, so technically, that gives me the right to make a change of my own, and seeing how you have pointed out that I am about as old as your friend here is endowed…

    -Ashley’s expression is priceless; shock as she stares as Foley, then slowly looks down at her breast, then attempts to cover them up by crossing her arms.-

    Mick Foley: … I’ve learned a few lessons in my day! I realize how this match will turn out. I will beat your ass. You will beat mine. Then somewhere along the line, right before I finish you off, your large friend here, Mr. Tomko will stick his nose in our bussiness, and I don’t know what you had in mine when you challenged me, but I sure as hell didn’t come back to the WWE to lose another match due to interference! So you want to face me at Saturday Night Main Event? Then make it a TAG TEAM MATCH! You and Tomko vs Me, and Steve Austin!

    Gregory Helms: No. No. No! You can’t just come down here and dictate anything you want. This isn’t Foley’s World.. you want to make this a tag match, fine, but only if you put something on the line….

    Mick Foley: Like what?

    Steve Austin: How about we put your friends silly little goatee on the line? I’ve been in the same ring with him for two minutes, and the damn thing is already starting to annoy the hell out of me.

    Gregory Helms: You want to put his goatee on the line? Fine you got it… but when we win, we don’t want a ‘cheap pop’… we want to make a statement. Foley, you lose… you RETIRE!

    -Foley’s expression is priceless. Despite being forced into retirement on a number of occasions before, the fact that Helms brought it up came out of left field since he never really thought about wrestling after SNME anyways.-

    Mick Foley: You want me to put my career on the line? Well you know as my old buddy…

    -Extreme Revolution starts up as Paul Heyman emerges out onto the stage. Heyman stops at the ramp, and begins to speak as the crowd loves to see the General Manager of Raw make an appearance.-

    Paul Heyman: Gentlemen, I hate to interrupt, but I must. You see despite how much I would LOVE to see this match happen, the cruel reality of the situation is that it just simply cannot. I would have no objections to Mick Foley facing Gregory Helms and Tyson Tomko, nor would I care who is chooses as a partner under normal circumstances, HOWEVER because Mick Foley feels it neccassary to put his career on the line, I have to look out for the best interest of my invest, which is Mick Foley’s career, and putting it in the hands of Steve Austin isn’t something I am comfrontable with considering your history of not showing up, Steve.

    -Austin is furious at this. He points at Heyman and begins to threaten him.-

    Paul Heyman: HOWEVER, since Mr. Austin has interjected himself into this situation, I feel he should be apart of its resolution. So since everyone is making their own stipulation to his match, let me chim in with one of my own. At Saturday Night Main Event, Gregory Helms and Tyson Tomko will face Mick Foley, and a partner of his choosing, whom I accept. If Mick Foley win, Tyson Tomko will shave off that silly little goatee, and if Mick Foley loses, he will be forced to retire and miss out on this year’s Wrestlemania. And as for Mr. Austin… since you getting in between Foley and Helms so much, I figure you will be a perfect SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE for this match!

    -Austin’s face turns from rage to shock, then to satisfaction as he turns his head back towards Foley who loves the sounds of that. –

    Mick Foley: So it seems, all I need to do to finalize this match is to go find myself a tag team partner. Now Gee, I wonder where I could find a partner at?

    -Foley gives that cocky smirk then looks up at the ramp just in time to hear the famous words echo throughout the arena…

    IF YA SMELL……WHAT THE ROCK… IS COOKING!

    -The roof explodes off the arena as The Rock emerges from the back much to the shock of Gregory Helms, Ashley Massaro, and Tyson Tomko. The Rock pauses at the top of the entrance ramp and raises his eyebrow for the crowd, then explodes into a full fledge charge, as he races down the entrance ramp. He slides into the ring and goes right after Tyson Tomko, as Steve Austin and Mick Foley turn their attentions towards Gregory Helms. The crowd is electric at this point, as Foley, Rock, and Austin are owning Helms and Tomko. The Rock is laying in with the right hands to the jaw of Tomko. Right Hand. Right Hand! Right Hand! ROCK BOTTOM! ROCK BOTTOM on Tyson Tomko! Foley is leveling Helms with right fist, after right fist. Helms ducks one of the attempts and goes behind Foley, only to receive a kick to the gut and a STUNNER from Austin! STUNNER to Helms! Rock, Austin, and Foley all stand in the middle of the ring, united as the crowd cheers on. Austin calls out for some beer, and tosses one to Foley, and the Rock. The three toast a cold one as Helms and Tomko retreat up the entrance ramp.-

    J-R's Commentary: I love to see the ingorance of youth come back to bite someone in the ass. I have to admit folks, before ole Mick Foley laid this bombshell out for us, I was starting to get worried, but there ain’t no way in hell my good friend Steve Austin is going to let this loud mouth punk end Mick Foley’s career, whether its fair or not! I say the over-under on the number of Stunners, Stone Cold delivers to the “No Gimmick Superstar” this Saturday needs to start out at three… and I’d still take the over!

    -Main Event, World Championship, No DQ Match-

    Booker T vs The Big Show /w Triple H

    The “Enfore of the Game” steps out onto the entrance ramp along side the Raw President, Triple H. The crowd voices their displeasure as the seven foot monster makes his way down the ramp, never taking his eyes off of the World Champion the entire way. Once at the bottom of the ramp, Big Show enters the ring by stepping over the top rope. Triple H demands that the ref hands him the World Championship, instead of handing it to the time keeper. Triple H admires the belt, then lays it on the apron, probably to motivate the Big Show. The bell sounds to start the match and Booker wastes no time going right after Big Show with open hand… or in his case gloved chops to the chest. Slap! Booker explodes with a second shot across the chest of Big Show, however Show respondes by headbutting Booker T. After their skulls collided, Booker falls back into the ropes. Show shows no signs of injury. Booker pushes himself off the ropes, and goes into a grapple with Big Show, but the big man easily tosses the former seven time world champion up in the air, and down into the corner. With his opponent trapped, Big Show take advantage of the situation and sandwichs Booker between himself and the turnbuckle. The Game applauds from the outside, as Big Show looks down at Raw’s president. Triple H raises the World Championship up in the air, and tells Big Show he is this close to the championship. Big Show nods his head, and turns his attention back towards Booker T. SLAP! Show explodes with an open hand chop across the chest of Booker T. Show looks over his shoulder for a moment, before grabbing the World Champion and tossing him way up in the air… and watching as he crashes into the center of the ring. Booker bounces off the canvas, grabbing his back. Triple H slides in a table into the ring. Show looks down at the table, then begins to nod. He bends down to pick up the table, but from behind Booker T rolls him up in a pinning perdicument! The ref is late rolling into position, 1…2…KICKOUT! Big Show kicks out at two, but even if he wouldn’t have kicked out, Triple H was already in the ring. The ref tells his boss to exit, which Triple H does after seeing his enforcer kicked out. It takes a moment for the Big Show to lift that large frame off the canvas and by the time he reaches his feet, Booker T has beat him there. The World Champion delievers a dropkick that sends Big Show falling backwards into the corner. Booker climbs up onto the middle rope and begins to whale away with right hands to Show. The Big Show finally forces Booker off of him by pie facing him off the middle rope! Booker crashes hard into the ca s, but quickly pickes himself up off the canvas. Show is there to greet him however nv with a stiff headbutt that sends Booker crashing back down to the canvas. Show begins to shake his head for a moment, as Triple H screams to stay on the attack. Big Show obeys. He makes his way over to Booker, where he picks him up by the threads, only to have the World Champion deliever an elbow to the gut! The Big Show slumps over, and Booker explodes out of no where with the Axe Kick! Both men crash to the canvas. All of a sudden the SPINARONI returns! Booker T spins his way back up to his feet as the crowd is going nuts at this point. Booker appears to be setting up Big Show for the finale. He waits for Show to reach his fee, but before he can unload, he is spun around. PEDIGREE! Triple H plants the World Champion with the pedigree as the crowd erupts into a chorus of boos. Triple H instructs Big Show to set up the table, to which the “Enforcer of the Game” obeys. Once the table is set up, HHH tells Big Show to finish him. Big Show grabs Booker T by the throat and pulls him off the canvas, high in the air. CRASH! Show chokeslams Booker T through the table. He plaes his hand on the chest of Booker, as Raw’s President tells the ref to make the count. 1…2….NO! Just before the ref can count to three, the Big Show is pulled out of the ring, by none other then DAVE BATISTA! The former World Champion scoops up the Big Show, spins around, and drives him through the announce table! The arena goes chaotic at this point. Batista picks himself up, and dusts himself off. He then slides into the ring where he goes face to face with Raw President, Triple H. Batista snatches the World Title out from the grasp of HHH, who hasn’t moved a muscle since seeing his enforcer be driven through the announce booth. Batista points over towards Big Show and says “That’s for Flair”, before letting loose with a “WOOOOO” which is recoiled by the fans. HHH has had enough, and backs off, before exiting the ring. Batista watches him as the Game makes his way over to check on his enforcer. Batista looks down at the damage to which he caused, then slowly looks towards the center of the ring, and sees Booker T motionless in the debris of Big Show’s wrath. Batista slowly then looks down at the World Championship. The Animal raises the belt high in the air as Raw goes off the air.

    NO CONTEST...thus Booker T RETAINS the World Championship!

    J-R's Commentary: Oh My Lord! What a way to return to action for Dave Batista, then to stand up for his long time mentor, Ric Flair, and attack the man who put him on the shelf! Plus you have to think that Batista has some unfinished bussiness with Booker T, and judging by the way he grabbed the World Title at the end, I'm guessing he is going to cash in his rematch clause at Saturday Night Main Event!

    End of Raw.......Good Night Now!
  4. Derrick Thomas

    Michael Irvin

    Bruce Matthews

    Art Monk

    Paul Tagliabue

    Those are my five in order of deservance... of those five, I think four have a great shot of getting in. The only expection being Michael Irvin, who will never see the Hall of Fame, I'm affraid due to character issues, which is completely moronic.

    Edit: Much like the way I spell. :shifty:

  5. Eh, I wouldn't be surprised to find out this was all a set up. I mean, stand back and think about it for a second. Crazytown hasn't been seen since 'Butterfly', and Good Charlotte is a 'pop punk' band. So in a strange way, someone may think that getting into a fight helps build their 'cred' in the rock industry, and the exposure for Crazytown proves 'hey, we aren't dead!'. Don't get me wrong, it didn't help.... people still view GC as a crappy pop-rock group, and in about fifteen seconds I will totally forget Crazytown ever existed, but I still wouldn't be shocked to find out this was all set up.

  6. I'm not really surprised by this at all. First off, don't they have MMA shows on ESPN2 or something like that? Besides both companies target audience is the same demographic, Males 18-35. That is who ESPN targets, and that is who UFC is built for. ESPN's marriage to boxing is losing viewership fast, and I wouldn't be surprised to see ESPN give UFC a shot. Due to the violence, I don't know if UFC could ever make the jump to a major channel like ABC, CBS, NBC, or Fox (Fox being the most likely of the bunch I have to believe), but I see no reason why ESPN wouldn't want to do this. I'm kind of shocked that it has taken this long.

  7. This is the second straight week Manning hasn't looked impressive at all, yet they've won. I don't know what to make of that,actually. I don't know if maybe the AFC was over-rated, or if the Colts were under-rated. Either way, it will be an interesting AFC Title match up whether its the Colts vs Pats or Bolts.

  8. wrestlingexposed.jpg

    WRESTLING NEWS & NOTES: 02/08/07: News on SNME, Jericho, Konfederacy, Plus Cage in Trouble!?!

    • The biggest news to come out of the WWE, the past few weeks has been the announcement of Chris Jericho's return. WrestlingExposed has confirmed that it will take place at SNME, and it will be apart of the 'Highlight Reel', where Chris Jericho will interview World Champion, Booker T! Some may speculate that this could mean his role for Wrestlemania may involve the World Title, then again that is only speculation.
    • A handful of matches were announced for SNME, including John Cena vs Edge vs Christian for the WWE Title, Mick Foley vs Gregory Helms, Shelton Benjamin vs Carlito for the IC title, as well as Matt Hardy vs Ken Kennedy. There are more matches rumored, but nothing concrete as of yet.
    • For those wondering about Cage's 'Shoot' comment about Edge and his problems with 'cheating', WrestlingExposed has learend that Adam Copeland not only wasn't upset, but he was the one who urged the writers to put it in there. So that squashes any theory of possible heat between the two. The two are reported to be good friends, so the comments seemed very much out of place. This explains a lot now.
    • The WWE apparently is growing more and more fond of the new tag team 'Konfederacy'. They love the instant heat that the team creates, and Johnny Ace and J-R are both very high on the worth ethic of both AG Wright and Kodi Wright. Expect them to stay in the spotlight for a long time.
  9. Feb07.jpg

    Monday Night Raw Febuary 07, 2007, Phoenix, AZ

    -The scene opens up to Raw with the ring entirely surrounded by WWE members from both Raw and Smackdown. In the ring are the two main men in charge, Triple H and Paul Heyman. The crowd begins to stir, knowing something is about to go down after hearing the news of CM’s cancellation of Smackdown. The brief silence is brought to an abrupt end with the sounds of…

    No Chance!

    That’s What you Got…

    No Chance In Hell!

    The WWE Chairman steps out onto the stage and makes his way down to the ring. Jim Ross welcomes everyone to the show, and promises everyone that it will be an historic night. Jerry Lawler makes reference to the fact that McMahon hasn’t been seen on WWE TV since he handed Raw over to Triple H, and Smackdown over to Paul Heyman. By the time these two get done talking, McMahon is in the ring, and taken center stage.

    Vince McMahon: I am going to make this quick, and to the point. There isn’t any need for BS, most all of you have heard by now. The CW Network has canceled ‘Smackdown’, thus leaving one of our two brands without a show. Before I get to what will happen, let me say one thing. CW, or more importantly the network heads that owns CW, Viacom…. You may have given the WWE a big ‘screw you’’ last week when you canceled our second biggest show, but tonight I am going to return the favor, ten fold. Viacom… SCREW YOU!

    -Pops can be heard throughout the arena.-

    Vince McMahon: I have never been someone who has bit my tongue, and dammit I refuse to start now! I’ll be damned if I am forced to take the blame for where the WWE is at tonight. Now, I’ll admit, it is a mess. I believe we are on the right track, but it isn’t what I believe a WWE product should be. However, I made the moves based on promises that YOU made me! You were the ones who told me that you were going to allow my WWE product to push the envelope even future! Yet, instead, you put more restraints on me, then a mental patient has in the pysic ward! You lied to me, and made me out to be a fool. Well Viacom, screw you! Screw MTV! Screw Spike TV! Screw the CW Network, and screw each and every single one of you! Because as of tonight, we are VIACOM FREE! And that means one thing….. THE RETURN OF ATTITUDE!

    -The place explodes as Vince says he wants to bring back ‘WWE Attitude’.-

    Vince McMahon: Now that isn’t just a warning to the network, that is a message to all of you wrestlers as well. Dammit, I said that we are going to return to our roots, and by god I mean it! From this point forward there will be no more brand split! There will be no more roster division. You are all WWE SUPERSTARS!

    -Ross and Lawler go nuts over the announcement of the aboloishment of the brand split.-

    Vince McMahon: Triple H, you will continue to over see Raw and serve as the President. Paul Heyman, you will come aboard, and serve as the General Manager. Both of you will work together, and both of you will like it! Because if I have to come back, it won’t be to fire one of you… it’ll be to fire BOTH OF YOU! You understand me?

    Triple H: Vince, these Smackdown punks are more then welcome on Raw. However, this is a warning to all of you. Know your place.

    Paul Heyman: Now! Now! Now, Triple H. I don’t know if you should undersell the Smackdown Superstars so fast.

    Triple H: There isn’t any Smackdown superstar that could compete with any of the top three Raw Superstars.

    Paul Heyman: Gee, that sounds like a challenge. Doesn’t it folks?

    -Huge pop as Heyman baits Triple H.-

    Paul Heyman: Tell you what, to prove just how even Smackdown and Raw are, lets battle it out. You pick three men, and I’ll pick three men. Sound fair? How about we go ahead and pick the teams right now. Lets have Smackdown represented by the United States Champion, CM PUNK! The Crippler, CHRIS BENOIT, and the World Champion, BOOKER T!

    Triple H: Fine, I’ll form a team. Lets have them face the enforce of my law, Big Show. Lets pair him with the Royal Rumble Winner, Randy Orton… and just to make sure those two are familiar with Smackdown, lets select someone who is apart of Smackdown. How about the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’, Gregory Helms.

    Paul Heyman: You’re on!

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    [- 'You Better Learn to Play The Game, by His Rules' -]

    -Raw Returns with Triple H and the Big Show remaining the ring, everyone else has left to the back. All that remains is the Raw President and his enforcer, the Big Show. As the Big Show walks over and demands a mic for the President, The Game just gives a death stare out at the arena, which is booing the hell out of him. After a few moments, the Raw President begins to address the ‘live’ crowd. -

    Triple H: I know we just got a lot of new guys moving over from Smackdown, so I want to everyone to take notice of what happened last week. I want everyone to realize what I did to Ric last week, it wasn’t done out of personal spite. It wasn’t done out of jealousy. It was done, because Ric Flair forgot his PLACE! He forgot just who the hell he was messing with! I’m Triple H! I’m the reason, Raw is what it is today! Raw has always been MY SHOW! Always has been! Always will be!

    You see, it is quite simple. I’m not that hard of a guy to work for. If you follow my direction, you’ll achieve more success then you ever imagined. Case in point, Randy Orton! The man is already a former World Champion, and now will get to life out his life long dream, and headline Wrestlemania! He followed my wisdom, and is better for it! Ric Flair, on the other hand, thought he was better then me. He thought because a bunch of idiots went ‘Wooooo’ everytime he entered the arena, that meant he could just do whatever the hell he wanted. WRONG! This is my show! This is my yard, and when you screw with me… there will be consciousness. So instead of being in this right with me right now, he is laying in a hospital bed in Charlotte! Let that be a warning to anyone who thinks about wanting to be a thorn in my side. I’m not Vince McMahon. I will not tolerate guys like rule breakers like Steve Austin, or John Cena!

    As for John Cena, he has a choice. He can choose the path that Randy Orton choose, and become one of the most respected WWE Superstars in history, or he can choose to continue to be this rebellious young gun slinger. However if that is going to be his path, then I suggest he leaves the WWE Championship on my desk, because there isn’t any chance in hell that I am going to let someone like him continue to wear the belt that I helped build up into one of the most respected championships in this industry. What Cena has to do is…

    WORD LIFE!

    Its Just Basic Thuganomics....

    -The crowd EXPLODES as the WWE Champion makes his way out onto the stage with the spinner WWE Championship around his neck. With every step he takes, it is obvious that he isn’t recovered from the beating that he endured last week at the hands of the President and his Enforcer. Cena rolls into the ring and goes toe to toe with Triple H. Neither man backing down, as the crowd is going nuts at this point. After what seems to be forever, Cena finally Cena pulls out a mic.-

    John Cena: Hunter….

    -WACK! Cena slaps Hunter right across the face with a slap! The crowd loves it as the Game is shocked. The Big Show goes to step in, but the Game motions for him to stay back.-

    John Cena: That was for Flair…. Now as for you and me, I don’t know what your problem with me is, but its obvious you haven’t liked me since the moment I stepped foot on Raw. I don’t know if it isn’t because I wasn’t one of your little ‘Kliq’ members, or one of your little ‘Evolution’ cronies, but that’s never been my style. I’m my own man. Some say, I’m an Army of One. Playing follow the leader, isn’t my game. So if you aren’t cool with that, I guess you and me have a problem, because I’ll be damned if I just hand this belt back over to you.

    Triple H: So you want to continue to be this ‘Army of One’, huh? You want to try to continue to fight for these fans, despite the fact that they boo you out of the arena every chance they get? You want to be stubborn, go right on ahead. That’s your choice! But as I said, if you want to make things easy for you, I would just hand me the WWE Title right now, because John… I promise you whether you hand it over to me, or I have to take it from you, there isn’t a chance in hell that I am letting you walk into, or out of Wrestlemania as the WWE Champion!

    -The crowd doesn’t like this at all, and begins to let Triple H hear about it with a flurry of boos. Cena takes a deep breath as he looks at the WWE Spinner championship for the longest time, then slowly looks back up at Triple H. Cena drops the belt at the feet of Hunter. The crowd erupts with boos, as Cena just lets the title rest at the feet of the Game. Hunter grows that cocky smirk, realizing Cena is finally starting to listen to him.-

    Triple H: Now see. Was that difficult? Now, if you let me teach you how to actually wrestle, maybe one day you can win this…

    -Wack! Cena drills the Raw President with a right hand! The Big Show lunges in towards Cena, but the WWE Champion ducks out of the way. He picks up the WWE Championship and drills Cena right in the face! Show staggers backwards and falls to the canvas. Cena waits for Hunter to climb back up to his feet, before delivering the FU! The crowd explodes as the WWE Champion shows up the Raw President one more time. Chants of ‘Cena, Cena, Cena, Cena’ begin to fill the arena, as he grabs the spinner belt, and rolls out of the ring. He backtracks up the entrance ramp as his music begins to play. Slowly Triple H rises up to his knees.-

    Triple H: CENA! You wanna play the Game? FINE! Then you just signed your DEATH WARRANT! Saturday Night Main Event will mark the end of your reign as WWE Champion. MARK MY WORDS!

    -Cena looks on defiantly, as Triple H begins to shake from the rage after being attacked by the WWE Champion. Big Show tries to help the Game up, but the Raw President will have none of it, shoving away his enforcer, and standing up on his own, while never taking his eyes off of the WWE Champion.-

    JimRoss: John Cena is finally starting to look like the Champion that everyone knew he could be. Can we say the Doctor of Thuganomics is back?

    JerryLawler: As long as he doesn’t try to rap. There should be a law banning white people from rapping.

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    Tag Team Title Unification Match

    ©Hardcore Holly & Test vs Rob Van Dam & Sabu vs ©The Konfederacy

    ANNOUNCER: Our next match is set for one fall, and will be for the UNDISPUTED WWE/World Tag Team Championship! Entering the ring first are the number one contenders…. They are Rob Van Dam and Sabu!!!!

    -RVD and Sabu emerge from the back and make their way down to the ring receiving a loud cheer from the crowd in Phoenix. The both waste no time going down to the ring, where they roll into the ring and begin to warm up.-

    ANNOUNCER: And now, making their way to the ring at this time… they are the current World Tag Team Champions, the team of Hardcore Holly, and Test!!!

    -Hardcore Holly and Test emerge from the back and begin to make their way down to the ring. The fans don’t really give them much of a reaction, which is embarrassing in a way since they are champions. Anyways, Hardcore Holly and Test reach the ring, and waste no time going right after RVD and Sabu. The four men begin to battle it out as Holly’s music dies down.-

    ANNOUNCER: And making their way to the ring at this time, they are current WWE Tag Team Champions… the team of AG Wright and Kodi Wright.. the Konfederacy!

    WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    As the WWE Tag Champions make their way out onto the stage, bedlam is breaking out inside the ring. Hardcore Holly delivers a stiff punch right to the jaw of Sabu, that sends him tumbling between the ropes and out onto the apron. He is able, however to catch himself before falling all the way to the floor, but never the less, is stuck on the apron. Sabu’s partner, RVD doesn’t care much for his partner getting drilled in the face, so he responds with a jab to the jaw of Hardcore Holly. Test meanwhile doesn’t like his partner getting drilled in the face, and charges into Rob Van Dam, sending all three men stumbling into the rope and falling out onto the floor below. While all of this is going on, the WWE Tag Champs appear to be in no rush as they are just now reaching the ring, and appear to be taking their time getting involved in the match. Meanwhile, right in front of J-R and King, Rob Van Dam, Hardcore Holly, and Test are all making their way to the their, but the crazy Sabu is waiting on them at the top rope! All of a sudden Kodi Wright explodes through the ropes and nails a suicide dive on the three men, sending them crashing to the floor. Inside the ring, AG Wright grabs Sabu from underneath and executes a powerbomb back into the ring! AG holds onto the move, as the ref slides in for the pinning position…1-2-3! AG releases the hold and rolls out of the ring, as the ref hands him both championship belts! Kodi slowly makes his way up onto the ramp, to join his brother!

    The Konfederacy DEFEATS RVD/Sabu & Test/Holly to WIN the WWE/WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS!

    JimRoss: Someone call the police, because what we just witnessed is nothing short of HIGHWAY ROBBERY!

    JerryLawler: Hey, they won the match. They don’t get paid by the hour, do they?

    Single Fall Match Up

    'Sir' William Regal vs 'The Samoan Bulldozer' Umaga w/ Estrada

    WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!

    Estrada and Umaga make their way out onto the stage, where they receive actually a mixed reactin from the crowd. Estrada doesn't pay the reaction any attention, but stops at the top of the entrance ramp and pulls out a microphone.

    Estrada: People of the W….W….E, the last time you saw me… I told you that I would LEAVE Raw if my Samoan Bulldozer lost! Well, low and behold, looks what we have! Smackdown came back to Raw, so me and the Samoan Bulldozer don’t have to move! That’s good news for me! That’s good news for you! That’s bad news for the other wrestlers of the W-W-E! Because you see…. Now that Umaga is back on Raw, he has one mission in mind, and that is to capture the WWE Championship! And my Samoan Bulldozer will do anything to achieve it… if it that means he has to KILL YOU! KILL YOU! KILL YOU!

    Estrada and his ‘Samoan Bulldozer’ makes their way down to the ramp as William Regal awaits the challengers in the middle of the ring. Umaga rolls into the ring and goes right after Regal. The bell sounds to begin the match. Umaga throws a wild lariat at Regal, who ducks easily. Regal connects with a straight jab to the gut of Umaga, followed up by a shot to the kidneys, then another shot to the gut, before a final European Uppercut, connects with Umaga. Regal begins to showcase his boxing skills to the fans, as J-R reminds us that Regal has been a professional fighter since he was 15. Regal turns back towards Umaga to find not only did Umaga never leave his feet, but his attacks did nothing but piss off the huge Samoan. Umaga charges and knocks down Regal with a shoulder thrust. Regal pulls himself back up to his feet, but Umaga explodes with a Flair Chop, then an open handed chop, a ‘Flair Chop’, then another open handed chop. Oddly enough, it is the Brit who is finding himself on the receiving end of these chops. Regal now finds himself in the corner, and that is when Umaga takes the opportunity to pancake Regal into the turnbuckle! Regal stumbles out from the corner, and right into the arms of Umaga, who drops him with a belly-to-belly slam! 1-2-KICKOUT! Estrada screams at the ref from the outside that he is an incompetent boob, and should be fired! The crowd actually cheers as Estrada continues to lay into the ref verbally.

    Back in the ring, the Samoan Bulldozer wastes no time arguing with the ref. Umaga pulls Regal up to his feet, or at least tries. As he is being pulled up, Regal explodes with a headbutt to the groin! With Umaga slumped over, Regal rams Umaga into the turnbuckle. The King says that Regal isn’t as dirty as Ric Flair, but J-R interrupts and says that may be true, but Regal is still as dirty as the south. Regal seems pretty proud of himself at this point but as he turns around, he cannot believe what he sees. Umaga is standing… furious. Umaga charges and again bulldozes Regal over to the ground. Regal springs up to his knees. The expression on his face is priceless. He is totally shocked as he has used damn near every trick in the bag and Umaga still seems unfazed. Regal pulls himself up to his feet and begins to tell the ref that Umaga is c heating. The ref goes over and makes sure that Regal isn’t telling the truth, however while doing this he isn’t able to see Regal reach into his tights and pull out a pair of brass knuckles! Regal places the ‘knucks’ over his hand, as Umaga shove the ref aside and charges toward Regal. Pop! Regal drills Umaga square in the head with the brass knuckles, yet remarkable Umaga isn’t fazed! If anything, it just appears to irritate the “Samoan Bulldozer”. Umaga goes wild, beating his chest and screaming out in his native tongue as Regal looks on shocked. Regal doesn’t know what to do, so he gives another swing with the brass ‘knucks’ but Umaga is able to duck out of the way, and lift up Regal for a ‘Samoan Drop’! Regal is squashed to the canvas as Umaga springs up to his feet. He waits as Regal crawls over to the bottom turnbuckle, before charging and exploding with his version of the face wash! The crowd rises to their feet anticipating Estrada ending it. He waits to let the crowd hype it some, before screaming… KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM! The crowd actually loves this, giving Estrada a nice pop. Umaga pulls Regal by the foot to the middle of the ring. Umaga then walks over to the ropes, and climbs up to the middle rope. Umaga goes crazy, then leaps off connecting with a mid-rope body squash! 1-2-3! Umaga Wins! The crowd actually gives him a nice little pop, which is odd to hear.

    Umaga DEFEATS “Sir” William Regal

    [- 'Beware Ladies... Ken Kennedy is on the Prowl' -]

    The scene fades backstage where we see Maria standing next to Ken Kennedy. Kennedy is admiring himself in front of a mirror. He lightly moves a few hairs, so that everything is perfectly in place. He brushes back his eyebrows. He then gives the mirror a flirtatious wink, as he continues to admire himself in the mirror.

    Maria: With me at this time is none other then Mr. Ken Kennedy…

    Ken Kennedy: KENNEDY!!!!!

    Maria: That’s what I said.

    Ken Kennedy: What?

    Maria: I said that’s what I said.

    Ken Kennedy: You said what?

    Maria: Kennedy.

    Ken Kennedy: I know. That’s my name. What do you want?

    Maria: Well, you have a match tonight against Matt Hardy. What are your feelings about that match?

    Ken Kennedy: Excitement. Pure and simple! Maria, I know this may come as a shock to you, but Ken Kennedy has been on a dry spell as of late with the ladies. It’s been well over three weeks since I have been out on a date. So needless to say, Ken Kennedy is on the prowl! And lets be honest, there isn’t any wrestler a single man in the WWE wants to face more then Matt Hardy.

    Maria: What does being single and Matt Hardy have to do with anything?

    Ken Kennedy: Have you not been keeping up with him, Maria? The man has more trouble holding onto girlfriends, then Terrell Owens has holding onto touchdown passes. I mean first it was Edge who stole Lita. Then Gregory Helms stole the Princess of Punk, Ashley Massaro away from him. Tonight, Ken Kennedy will be the next an in line, when he steals…

    -Pause.-

    Ken Kennedy: ......just who is Matt Hardy dating now anyways?

    Maria: Nobody that I know of.

    Ken Kennedy: WHAT! No girlfriend? If he doesn’t have a girlfriend for me to steal, what’s the use of wrestling the tool, then?

    -Kennedy walks off obviously irrated as Maria just looks on with that cute, clueless expression.-

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    Ken Kennedy vs Matt Hardy

    OOOOOHHHHHH YEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

    The crowd explodes as Matt Hardy emerges out onto the entrance ramp. He throws his classic ‘V1’ sign up in the air, as Matt Hardy quickly makes his way down to the ring where Ken Kennedy is waiting. Matt Hardy rolls into the ring, and climbs the bottom rope, once more flashing the ‘V1’ sign. However before the bell can ring, Ken Kennedy demands a microphone.

    Ken Kennedy: Aren’t you forgetting something?

    -Matt Hardy looks at Ken Kennedy oddly, totally clueless as to where Kennedy is going with this.-

    Ken Kennedy: Listen up Hardy, let me explain how things work around here. Everyone has their place. Triple H is the boss. Jim Ross is the announcer. Your ‘place’ in the WWE is the guy who gets his girlfriend taken away by guys like me!

    -Hardy looks on as his expression is growing more angrier by the moment.-

    Ken Kennedy: Guys like me, you know… winners. Our job is to STEAL girlfriends from losers like you. So as the Rock used to say… know your role, and go find yourself a girlfriend for me to steal!

    Hardy is furious at this point. He explodes with a shot right to the face of Ken Kennedy. The crowd goes wild, as they give Hardy a huge pop, after the charismatic superstar has obviously heard enough. Kennedy is stunned by the show of courage from Matt Hardy, however after a moment he explodes with a shot to the head of Matt with the microphone! Hardy stumbles over, and moments later is drilled in the side of the face with a FACE WASH! Kennedy drops the mic at this point, and grabs Hardy by the hair, pulling him up to his feet. EVENFLOW! Kennedy spikes Hardy’s head into the canvas, then rolls out of the ring after the ref had no choice but to call off the match. Kennedy backtracks up the entrance ramp, screaming at Hardy that he is a worthless! The crowd boos Kennedy out of the building obviously disagreeing with Mr. Kennedy.

    The match ends in a NO CONTEST

    [- 'Thou Shall Not Break God's Laws' -]

    -The scene fades backstage where we see the victorious Tag Team Champions, the Konfederacy walking down the hall. They are still gloating after their victory tonight, establishing themselves as the top tag team in the industry. The two brothers turn the corner and run into none other then WWE Diva Champion, Mickie James. She apologizes and moves on quickly, however as she passes, Andrew Glenn Wright wraps his around her and forces her against the wall.-

    AG Wright: Why if it isn’t Ms Mickie James… how are you doing this even, my little southern bell?

    Mickie James: Leave me alone, please.

    AG Wright: Is that any way to talk to your brother?

    Mickie James: You and I most defiantly aren’t related. Now let me go!

    AG Wright: Oh but you see my sister we are related. True, the same blood that flows in our veins may not have a common bond, but the common skin on the outside connects us! We are one in same, Ms James. We are on the same side of the war, don’t you see?

    -Mickie goes to speak, but AG covers her mouth with his free hand. He moves in closer towards Mickie, pinning her between himself and the wall behind her. Kodi Wright stands at his brother’s side.-

    AG Wright: And my sister, I feel it is my obligation to inform you that you are breaking the law… God’s law! You read the good book, Mickie? Because if you did, you would clearly read where it states that you shall only be with your own kind! DeShaun Christian may be a good man, but one look at him, and its obvious you and him aren’t of the same kind. So if I were you, I would break it off immediately, because we all know what happens when people break God’s law.

    Mickie James: You’re a creep!

    AG Wright: And you… Sister James…. you’ve been warned!

    Kodi Wright: WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    -AG releases Mickie, who is frozen in fear. Wright gives her that sick sadistic smirk of his, then walks off with his brother. James slowly sinks to the floor and begins balling. After a few moments, we see DeShaun Christian rush onto the scene, and begins to console his girlfriend.-

    JimRoss: Those Konfederacy boys are evil to the core, I tell you! They are as evil all of ex-wifes!!!

    JerryLawler: Poor Mickie, I hope someone teaches these jerks a lesson!

    Non Title, Gold Rush Match

    ©"The King of Cool" Carlito w/ Melina vs Shelton Benjamin

    I SPIT IN THE FACE… OF PEOPLE WHO DON’T WANT TO BE COOL!

    The crowd gives off a huge reaction as Carlito makes his way out onto the entrance ramp with the lovely Melina. Well lovely most of the time, now she is just the extremely pissed off Melina, who you can tell by the expression on her face wants nothing to do with being Carlito’s slave till Wrestlemania. Carlito welcomes in the warm reception from the fans, then turns back to Melina and points to himself, obviously taking credit for the huge ovation. Carlito walks down to the ring with Melina reluctantly following him. Carlito rolls into the ring and raises the IC title belt high in the air, then throws it down at his corner. He tells Melina to watch it, but Melinda starts to do something unexpected. She begins to take off her shirt! The crowd loves it as she rips off the shirt, only to reveal a second shirt underneath. At first glance the shirt appears to be nothing more then a light blue Carlito shirt, with the apple plastered in the middle. Carlito grins and gives Melina thumbs up, however upon second glance of the shirt, he realizes the shirt reads ‘Carlito Sucks’, and ‘King of Drool’. Carlito begins to tell Melinda just how un-cool that is, but Shelton drills him from behind as the match begins.

    J-R tells how making Melina his slave may come back to hurt Carlito in the end. The visual on the screen only future agrees with ‘Good Ole JR’, because Melina appears happy as Shelton stomps away at Carlito. Shelton delivers kick after kick to the back of Carlito, who is defenseless at this point. After Benjamin grows tired of kicking on the King of Cool, he pulls Carlito up to his feet, only to execute an uppercut to the Intercontinental Champion! Carlito falls backwards and lands on the top rope, but is totally dazed from the initial offense of Shelton Benjamin from the early going. Shelton takes the time to tell Carlito how good of a job he is doing, before delivering a kick to the gut of the wide-open Intercontinental Champion. As the Carlito slumps over, Shelton grabs him by the head, and spikes him into the canvas! Melina cheers on Shelton from the outside as he springs up to his feet. J-R makes note of the cocky expression that is plastered all over Shelton’s face at this point. Benjamin grabs Carlito by the hair, and pulls him up to his knees. He gets in Carlito’s face and begins to tell him just how much of a joke he thinks Carlito is, before laying a straight bitch slap across the face of Carlito sending the Intercontinental back into the middle rope. Carlito is now facing the outside, and Melina begins to lay into him verbally as well, telling him that he isn’t cool. Shelton walks over and tells Melina to back off. The lovely vixen does exactly that and watches as Shelton grabs a hold of the top rope. Shelton leaps over the top ropes, but showing his incredible athletic ablity, drills Carlito in the face with a dropkick! J-R explodes at this point, telling everyone how Shelton Benjamin is the most gifted athlete in the W-W-E today, and that move was just an example. The King chimes in saying that Shelton told him earlier in the day, he would use that move, and that he calls it the ‘803’. Carlito is now motionless in the middle of the ring, as Shelton climbs up to his knees and does his Shawn Michaels praising the lord expression.

    The crowd is reigning boos down upon the ring as Shelton soaks up the reaction. He finally crawls over to the Intercontinental Champion, and rolls him over. J-R gives us his prediction that this one is over, as the ref counts: 1-2-KICKOUT! The crowd lets loose with a huge cheer, as Shelton cannot believe what just happened. He holds up three fingers, but the ref assures him that it was only a two count. Shelton isn’t buying that at all, and gives the ref the middle finger expression. Shelton however has no choice but to go back to work. He picks up Carlito by the hair, and hurls him between the top and middle turnbuckles. Carlito’s face is facing the outside, and once more, Melina begins to verbally abuse Carlito from the outside. Shelton turns his attention back towards the ref, and tells him exactly what is on his mind. J-R explodes on the headset as Melina begins to choke Carlito, now that the ref is distracted! He says he can never remember a situation where a manager is attacking his or her own client during the match. Melina finally releases the chokehold, but not before she drills Carlito in the face with a punch, that sends him flying back into the ring. Shelton is still laying into the ref with a verbal abuse; only equal to the one Melina gave Carlito on the outside. The ref says that isn’t anything he can do, and tells Shelton to go back to wrestling. Shelton begins to tell the ref never to tell him what to do, but Carlito rolls up Shelton from behind! 1-2-KICKOUT! The crowd lets loose a sigh as the Carlito roll up, only got a two count. Shelton has had enough. He grabs Carlito and pulls him up, before laying into him with a right hand. Carlito blocks it! Carlito explodes with a right hand of his own! Shelton is dazed! The Intercontinental Champion explodes with a second shot, then leaps high into the air, executing a picture perfect dropkick! Melina begins to go crazy at this point, screaming for Shelton to get up, but Carlito squashes any hope of that when he drops down on Shelton with a leg drop.

    The crowd is loving it at this point as Carlito is in full control of the match. He mounts Shelton and begins to lay into the challenger with right hands to the face. Melina screams from the outside that Carlito is cheating, and tells the ref to stop him. Carlito finally rolls off Shelton and climbs up to his feet. He walks over to the ropes and pounds his chest, awaiting Melina to respond. She does, and tells Carlito that he sucks, then points to her shirt. Carlito turns his attention back towards the center of the ring, as Melina grabs her purse and begins digging through it. Shelton begins to stagger up to his feet, but Carlito catches him with a fisherman’s suplex that he holds onto for the pin! J-R says that Carlito may have this one: 1-2-No! Melina reaches under the bottom rope and pulls the left foot out from under Carlito, forcing the pinfall to be broken. The crowd lays into Melina as Carlito jumps up onto his feet. He begins to lay into Melina from the ropes, telling her to cut it out. Melina doesn’t say a word, but rather pulls her hand from behind her back and sprays Carlito with some bottle, right in his eyes! J-R screams out “What the hell is that!”. King says he believes it is a bottle of perfume, but whatever it is, it is now all over the eyes of Carlito who is blinded. Shelton rolls up onto his feet, and moves in from behind with a SHELL SHOCK (Angle Slam). Shelton makes the cover: 1-2-3! The crowd erupts into a chorus of boos as Melina begins to cheer Shelton’s victory from the outside. Carlito rolls around on the canvas, in pain from the spray of perfume. Shelton rolls out of the ring, where Melina gives him a huge hug. Shelton begins to walk up the entrance ramp, as Melina rolls into the ring. She stands over Carlito, who is still trying to get the spray out from his eyes. Melina just looks down at Carlito and grins with satisfaction.

    Shelton Benjamin DEFEATS Carlito!

    Shelton earns a shot at the Intercontinental Title at SNME!

    JimRoss: That damn ‘Jezebel’ just cost Carlito the victory! And now because of her interference, Shelton Benjamin will have a shot at the Intercontinental Championship at Saturday Night Main Event!

    JerryLawler: You said it J-R. Carlito may come to regret making Melina his slave. In fact, he may already regret it.

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    [- 'No Gimmicked Required.... Just Answers' -]

    We return from the commercial break with the sounds of howling winds….

    Make Me A...

    SUPERSTAR!

    -As the sounds of Saliva are heard, out marches the longest reigning Cruiserweight Champion in history, Gregory Helms, with his Princess of Punk, Ashley Massaro. The crowd greets them with a chorus of boos, to which they seem to soak up receptively. The young, hot couple makes their way down to the ring, seemly with not a care in the world. After a few moments to walk up the steps, they enter the ring and take their spot in the middle of the ring.-

    Gregory Helms: So I finally return to Raw, and this is how all you greet me? Well screw you too! I didn’t miss a single one of you. In fact here lately things couldn’t be better for ole’ Gregory Helms. I’m the longest reigning champion in WWE History! I’ve got the most badass woman in the world at my side! And it seems everyone wants a shot at the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’. Hell, guys are even coming out of retirement, just to get a shot at me.

    -Helms is interrupted by a chant of ‘Mick, Mick, Mick, Mick, Mick’. The mere mentioning of Foley’s name brings rage across the face of Helms.-

    Gregory Helms: Yeah, that’s right. He wants a piece of me! And can you blame him? After all, look at him now. He’s forgotten! No one cares about him anymore. He even said it himself, he get pinned to the floor more then a hooker at a frat party. Everyone has a win over Foley, and now he wants to go out on top! He wants to beat me, to prove he still has it. Well Mick the answer to your challenge is NO! I won’t face you at Wrestlemania! However, if you are really wanting a piece of me… then come out here and face me like a man, and I MIGHT give you a shot at ‘Saturday Night Main Event’!

    SKREEEEEEEECH…..

    CRAAAAAAASH!!!!

    -The crowd explodes as Mick Foley emerges out on the entrance ramp. The look in his eyes tell the story. There is a fire burning that quite honestly wasn’t there at the Royal Rumble. He acknowledges the crowd, but its obvious he isn’t here to play nice with the home folk, but rather he is here for bussiness. Foley rolls under the bottom rope and walks over to the corner to get a microphone. He then joins Helms in the center of the ring.-

    Mick Foley: Now I know I’ve whacked in head a lot over my career, so maybe I’ve developing a cause of amnesia, but it seems to me that it was YOU who answered MY challenge, not the other way around. You are the one who came looking for me. However that just a technicality at this point, because whether you came looking for me, or I came looking for you, it seems that we both are now looking for one another, and if you want to have our match at ‘Saturday Night Main Event, then that’s fine with me, because I didn’t want wait that long anyways!

    Gregory Helms: Mick, think twice about this. Take a good, long, hard look in the mirror, because you aren’t the wrestler you were five years ago. This is a new day. This is a new time. I’m the longest reigning Cruiserweight Champion in history! You are nothing more then a ‘Gimmick Wrestler’, who caught a few lucky breaks.

    Mick Foley: A gimmick wrestler? You say I’m nothing more then a gimmick wrestler? Well Gregory, I may have made a living off of jumping off roof tops, and leaping off of cages, but I have accomplished a hell of a lot more in my career, then you ever will! I know you are the longest reigning cruiserweight champion, but I’ve been the champion over ENTIRE COMPANIES! True, I may have had to do some crazy stuff in my day, and if you want to call that a ‘gimmick’, then be my guest, but when I was jumping off roof tops and cage cells, I was winning World Titles. What have you done, besides steal Matt Hardy’s girlfriend, and dominate a bunch of lightweights?

    Gregory Helms: You want to question me? Me? The No Gimmick Superstar? Don’t make that mistake Mick. Remember this! I’m ten times the WRESTLER… the MAN… and the CHAMPION, that you ever were! I’m faster! I’m stronger! I’m better! And most of all, I’m smarter! You and I… we aren’t even playing the same game, Mick. You are playing checker, while I am playing chess. While you are worrying about what you are going jump off next, I’m three moves a head of you! Always have been….ALWAYS WILL BE!

    - Greg and Ashley take a step back, as they drop the microphone. Foley looks on in confusement for a second, but realizes it’s a trap. Too Late! Foley is drilled from behind with a steel chair! The crowd lets loose with a roar of boos as they see the man who attacked Foley from behind is none other then TYSON TOMKO! Tomko drops the chair, and him and Gregory Helms begin stomping away at the defenseless body of Mick Foley. J-R is screaming about how Gregory Helms planned all of this, and it isn’t fair. Finally Helms subsides the attack and stands over Mick Foley victorious. He places one foot over the chest of Mick Foley and raises his arms in victory, as the crowd reigns down on the ring with boos.-

    JimRoss: This isn’t right dammit! Gregory Helms set up Mick Foley! He set him up to get his ass whipped!

    JerryLawler: Mick Foley should have knew better, J-R.

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    [- Its Time To Give Some Answers, Brother -]

    The Time Has Come to Change My Way…

    On This Day, I See Clearly….

    Everything Has Come to Life!!!

    -The crowd gives a huge reaction as Edge emerges from the smoke. J-R says that he feels for this match, who fought so hard to win the rumble, only to have it robbed from him by a man who we all thought was like a brother to him, Christian Cage. Edge rolls into the ring and takes his spot in the middle of the ring.-

    Edge: Don’t expect me to come out here and piss and moan about how I was robbed of the Rumble. Yeah, it sucks, but there is a locker room full of wrestlers who have been screwed ten times worse then me. And the truth is, I’ve done enough screwing around in my career, so the way I see it, what happened at the Rumble was Karma biting me in the ass! I’m not out here to whine about what happened, I’m here to get answers! You see there is one man in this industry I am loyal too. One! There is only one man who I claimed my alliance too! We traveled the road together. We won championships together. We were brothers. Now true, over time we grew apart. After the brand split happened, we were sent to different rosters. He eventually left the company and went down south, even winning their championship.

    -Some muttering goes on as TNA is finally recognized by the WWE.-

    Edge: But don’t get it twisted! I was happy for him! I felt the same pride when he won that belt that he had for me when I won the WWE Championship. Traveling around this country, we both talked about how one day we would be Heavyweight Champions, and dammit, we achieved our dreams! I couldn’t be happier for him, so when I turned around at the Royal Rumble to see who threw me out, Christian Cage… you were the last man I expected to see. And for the last week I’ve had to sit and wonder why you would do this to me. I’ve had to sit back and think about every single possibility. Cage, I’m tired of waiting. Get your ass out here, face me like a man, and tell me exactly…

    5……………

    4…………

    3………

    2……

    1…

    CHRISTIAN!

    -The crowd erupts into a loud chorus of boos as Christian makes his way out onto the entrance ramp. As soon as he reaches the ramp, the boos in the arena grow even louder as “Capitan Charisma” makes his return to WWE TV. Edge locks eyes with him, giving him a death stare. Christian cracks that cocky smirk of his and begins to strut down to the ring, almost enjoying the fact that he now knows Edge was bothered by Christian’s interference at the Rumble. Christian rolls into the ring and goes face to face with the man who he once claimed to be a ‘brother’ of his. After awhile, he slowly pulls out a mic. –

    Christian Cage: So you were happy for me? That’s good to know… of course it would have been nice to actually receive a phone call and heard it from you! Oh, but don’t worry Edge, I understand. You couldn’t actually call me, because you were busy. After all, cheating on your wife with whatever ‘skank of the month’ you happen to be shagging at the point, is awful time consuming, isn’t it?

    -The crowd explodes into bedlam as Cage explodes on Edge with a real life ‘shoot’ comment.-

    Christian Cage: That’s right, I went there. So don’t come at me with this ‘Alliance’ bullshit. You couldn’t even spell the damn word, let alone executes its meaning. Hell the only person in this world you’ve ever been loyal too is Adam Copeland. Screw everyone else! You’ve always been about yourself. You never once cared about what happened to me, your wife, your friends, or anyone else. You want to know how many phone calls I received from you after I left this place? None! Zero! Zip! It would have been nice to actually hear some words of encouragement from a man who I once considered a friend, during my darkest time, but did I receive a single word from you? Not one! Why? Cause you were off in your own little world, (beep)’ing Amy all the way to the WWE Championship, then (beep)’ing her the night after you won the damn thing! But of course, like everything else, after she served her purpose, you got rid of her too! See Adam, that’s the problem with you … you’re only about you. And what happened at Rumble™ was just a TASTE of the Karma you have coming your way, because now that I am here full time… I plan on making your life a living hell!

    -The two drop their mics and go toe to toe. J-R gives his classic ‘Bussiness Is About to Pick Up’ line as the two former best friends go face to face as the arena fills with excitement. Neither man moves, daring the other to make the first move and ignite this explosive situation. However there is a spark given to the situation in the form of…

    IT’S TIME TO PLAY THE GAME!

    The crowd roars with disapproval as Raw President, Triple H steps out onto the stage with his Law Enforcer, Big Show. The two stop at the top of the entrance ramp as Triple H looks out at the crowd and their reaction to him. The look on his face tells the story, pure distain. He slowly pulls the microphone up and begins to speak.

    Triple H: I’m sure there is nothing more these idiots here in Phoenix would love to see more then to see you two beat the hell out of one another in that ring, but seeing how I am the man in charge, I want to offer up a suggestion first to both of you before you engage in this little, pissing contest you got going there. Now I understand you two don’t like one another… and you guys did a pretty good job of explaining exactly why. So I’m all for you two beating the hell out of one another, however I am going to offer both of you the chance of a life time! You see, I have a problem, and that problem goes by the name of John Cena...

    -The crowd cheers the name of the WWE Champion, which draws out that look of distain from Triple H. He refocuses himself and goes back to talking.-

    Triple H: Now let me just be honest with you, I don’t really like either one of you two. However, luckily for you, I don’t dislike either of you, either! So if you two want to beat the hell out of one another, go right on ahead, just save it for Saturday Night Main Event, and while you are beating the hell out of each other, make sure and beat the hell out of John Cena as well! Because I’ve giving you guys your match… you got it! At Saturday Night Main Event, it will be Edge vs Christian Cage........... vs John Cena for the WWE Championship!

    -The arena explodes as HHH announces the main event for SNME. Edge and Christian look shocked as the Raw President drops a bombshell on them, that they will be involved in a triple threat match at SNME for the WWE Championship. –

    JimRoss: Oh My! The Main Event for Saturday Night Main Event is SET! I can’t wait to see that one!

    JerryLawler: Cena won’t like that. In triple threats, he loses his championship advantage.

    6 Man Tag Main Event Match

    Booker T, CM Punk, Chris Benoit vs Gregory Helms, The Big Show, Randy Orton

    Hey!………………………………Hey!

    Hey! There’s Nothing You Can Say

    Nothings Gonna Change What You’ve Done To Me

    Now My Time to Shine… I’m Gonna Take What’s Mine

    Take What’s Mine!

    All other participants are the ring, awaiting the entrance of the 2007 Royal Rumble Winner, Randy Orton. The golden pyros fall from the ceiling as Orton soaks them up, along with the crowd’s reaction. After soaking up every last bit of attention he could get, he turns his attention towards the ring, where he makes his way down to the ring. He hops up on the apron, and tells Helms to go in first. Greg begins to argue, but from behind explodes the United States Champion, CM Punk leveling Helms to the ground. Punk connects with stiff kick after stiff kick, sending Helms crawling towards an empty corner. Punk doesn’t wait to be attacked, and drills Orton square in the jaw with an elbow, which catches the ‘Legend Killer’ off guard. Orton goes to enter the ring, but the ref stops him. Punk goes back to work on Helms in the corner as Orton continues to try to get a piece of Punk. The United States Champion begins to lay into Helms in the corner, with more stiff kicks. The Big Show is able to move along the apron, and slams Punk’s head into the top turnbuckle from behind! The ref is still distracted with Orton, and this move goes totally un-noticed. Punk falls forward, and lands in the middle of the ring. Helms crawls over to the corner, and makes the tag to the Big Show, one which the ref sees. Big Show steps over the top rope with ease and walks to the center of the ring where Punk is trying to muster the strength to get to his feet. Big Show helps him up, but then sends him back down to the canvas with a monstrous head-butt that puts a dents in CM Punk’s skull… or at least that’s what J-R tells us.

    Punk crashes to the canvas as Big Show takes control of the match. He gives a look back over to his corner, where Orton seems disinterested in wanting in, and Gregory Helms seems to still hurting from the opening exchange. Big Show moves his attention then back towards the United States Champion. Show picks up Punk and hurls him across the ring, and into the turnbuckle! J-R goes crazy over the strength of the Big Show, saying that he is as strong at least four of his oxen back home on his farm in Oklahoma. Show makes his way over to Punk, and proceeds to lick his hand. CHOP! Show delivers a chop right across the chest of Punk, that sends chills up each and every single spine in the arena. CHOP! Show delivers a second one to the chest of Punk. Punk rolls over on his sides and crawls over to his corner. Big Show could probably stop him, but allows him to crawl over to the corner, almost daring someone to make the tag. Someone does… that someone is none other then the ‘Crippler’ Chris Benoit. Chris charges the Big Show and drills him with a shoulder thrust, that does little to nothing. Benoit bounces off the ropes once more, but Show this time explodes with his own shoulder thrust that sends the Crippler crashing back down to the canvas. The Big Show lets out a roar that resembles that of ‘King Kong’. With that out of his system, he goes back to work on Benoit. He picks up Benoit and lifts him up into the air. However once in the air, Benoit goes wild, and begins to headbutt Big Show, who is unable to block Benoit, due to holding him up. Benoit rams his own head into the skull of Big Show, finally forcing Show to release the hold. Benoit falls back into the ropes, then springboards himself into the air and drills Big Show with a flying headbutt that is more like a headbutt missle! However the move is successful, and sends the Big Show stumbling backwards into the corner turnbuckle.

    Gregory Helms realizes his partner is in danger, and unlike Orton, who really has shown no interest in the match at all, Helms goes to enter the ring, but as he does, he is pulled down from the apron. Helms is spun around and begins to be whaled on by none other then MICK FOLEY! Foley drills punches to Helms, and finally for the first time in the match Orton shows some interest. He jumps down from the apron, and walks over to Foley, giving his former enemy a slug to the back, and allowing Helms to gather himself long enough to begin exchanging punches of his own. Orton turns his attention back towards the ring where Benoit has tag in the World Champion. Orton now is interested back in the match, but is torn between staying outside and helping Helms, or going back to see if he can get the tag. Chris Benoit points to Booker to go after the ‘Law Enforcer’ of the WWE, while he stands and watches. Booker does exactly this and begins to work on the Big Show in the corner. Helms and Foley back on the outside, begin to fight all the way up the entrance ramp, and are now at the top of the entrance ramp. The two men exchange punches, with neither man giving an inch. One will throw a punch, then the other will throw one. This continues for what seems forever, with neither man showing any signs of wearing down.

    With Gregory Helms fighting Mick Foley up on the entrance ramp, team Raw seems to be down a man, however this doesn’t affect the Rumble winner at all. He rolls into the ring, spins around Chris Benoit and drops the former United States Champion with a RKO! RKO! RKO! Benoit is motionless, and Randy Orton is proud of his accomplishment of putting the RKO on an unaware Chris Benoit. He pounds his chest, and does the classic Orton pose as the crowd erupts into a loud chorus of boos, hating everything about Randy Orton. He turns around slowly, only to see CM Punk standing over Benoit, waiting patiently. Orton thinks twice, and drops to the canvas, before exiting the ring. The crowd boos its head off, as J-R calls Orton everything but a coward. Orton just shakes his head, saying that he doesn’t want any part of this handicap match, which leaves the Big Show alone in the ring. The ‘Law Enforcer’ begins to bring himself back up to his feet, after being drilled with all those kicks to the face. He reaches his feet, but is still very groggy as the World Champion waits for him to fall into position. Book End! The World Champion makes the cover on the Big Show: 1-2-3! The crowd cheers as Booker T and CM Punk celebrate the victory with, Chris Benoit & Big Show still motionless in the ring. Booker T dares the number one contender to come ‘get him some’, but Orton just shakes his head no, telling Booker that he isn’t worth it. The scene switches back to Gregory Helms and Mick Foley who are battling it out on the entrance ramp. Out from the back explodes Tyson Tomko! He drills Foley from behind leveling the unsuspecting Foley for the second time tonight with a steel chair. Foley crashes to the steel ramp. With Foley down, Helms motions for Tomko to step away. Ashley has joined her man at the top of the ramp, as Orton stands behind her watching the whole thing unfold. Helms grabs Foley by the hair and pulls him up to his knees. He throws him between his legs, then lifts him over his head before dropping him off the stage with a Three Count Drop (Border Drop). Foley is sent flying off the stage and through a production table! The cameras rush over to show Mick Foley motionless underneath the debris of table, cables, and TV monitors. The scene fades back up to the ramp, showing the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’ Gregory Helms, Ashley Massaro, Tyson Tomko, and ‘The Legend Killer’ Randy Orton all looking down at the mess below with a look of disgust, yet satisfaction.

    Booker T, CM Punk, Chris Benoit DEFEATS Big Show, Randy Orton, Gregory Helms

    JimRoss: They killed him! They Killed him! That Son of a Bitch Killed Mick Foley!

    JerryLawler: J-R this is serious, I don’t see, Mick moving.

    End of Raw.......Good Night Now!
  10. MAJOR NEWS CONCERNING THE DIARY

    Please Read, Very Important

    Ok here’s the deal. I screwed up. I increased my ‘risk values’ for the pay per view, and forgot to undo them when the pay per view was over. As a result, the CW Network canceled Smackdown. YIKES! Now, I could go back and just arsenic it, and to be honest that is something I thought long and hard about, however after thinking about it, I decided to continue onward. After all, if things happen in real life, the WWE just couldn’t ‘arsenic’ it. They would have to regroup and move on. That is what I am going to do. I am going to combine the rosters, eliminate some titles, and change a few things. I will list most of the things I will do, though some I may explain in show.

    1-Show Layout: I am going to change to a more descriptive show. This is something I was already thinking about doing before hand to add more detail to the diary, however because of the fact I had two brands, I was weary of over working myself and burning out. Now that things have worked out this way, I am going to do my Raw in a more descriptive show, so that I can help build up characters, and explain feuds better, then I could with summary based shows.

    2-Championships: As is expected, I am going to have to ‘consolidate’ some of the titles in the WWE. The first to go will be the Diva Championship. We have really only two competitors for that title, so eliminating this isn’t that big of a thing. I will also be consolidating the Tag Team and WWE/World Championships, though that will be done at a much later date, most likely Wrestlemania. I would like to keep the United States, and Intercontinental Championships, and I am still undecided on what to do with the Cruiserweight Championship.

    3- Roster: Obviously there will be some cuts, but nothing major. I’m not cutting John Cena, Big Show, Kane, Triple H, someone like that. The guys you may see me cut are the ones who I haven’t used yet. The WWE has plenty of money, so I can afford to be liberal with who I keep and I’d rather keep people rather then lose them.

    Other then that, everything else should be nothing more then storyline related. Do not look for very many updates over the next week, because I am going to have to rethink all of my WM plans. However the delay should only be about a week at the very latest. Maybe not even that long since I already have an idea for what I want to do at WM, I just need to see if I can fit everything in.

  11. Jan29.jpg

    Monday Night Raw January 29, 2007 From San Antonio, TX

    The Time Has Come to Change My Way…

    On This Day, I See Clearly….

    Everything Has Come to Life!!!

    -Raw begins with Edge storming out onto the entrance ramp with Lita. Neither of who look to be too happy following last night’s results in this exact same arena. Edge and Lita, who are normally all over one another, look to be strictly about bussiness tonight as he makes his way down to the ring and grabs the stick.-

    Edge: Now I know I have cried wolf before, but last night at the Royal Rumble I was SCREWED out of winning that match. I was SCREWED out of my shot of headling Wrestlemania 23, and worst of all… I never saw it coming! Christian Cage….

    -The mentioned of Cage’s name brings out a mix of emotions throughout the arena.-

    Edge: Christian Cage was a man I once called my best friend! Hell, at one point in time, he was my ONLY FRIEND! So for last night to go down the way it did… I don’t think I’m going out on a limb here when I say that I want a damn explanation! So Christian Cage, get your ass out here right now!

    -Edge and Lita wait for a moment as the hype builds up throughout the arena. However the music they hear isn’t the sounds they wanted.-

    ‘ITS TIME TO PLAY THE GAME’

    -Out walks Raw President, Triple H who appears to still be fuming from last night’s main event. Big Show is behind Triple H, who looks down at Edge.-

    HHH: Edge… I’m been in your shoes. Men I once considered brothers have stabbed me in the back, just like what happened to you last night. I know what you are feeling, but Edge… Christian isn’t here. He left San Antonio.

    -Boos fill the arena.-

    HHH: However, seeing how I understand where you are coming from, and figured you would react the way you did, I took the liberties of informing Mr. Cage that if he wants to collect another pay check from the WWE again, he better show up to Raw next week!

    -Edge nods with approval.-

    HHH: And seeing how, you weren’t the only one who’s plans didn’t go quite as planned last night, I also made a match tonight to rectify that situation as well! It seems that Ric Flair loves to be a thorn in my side, as of late. So tonight, once again Ric Flair… you are going to go one on one with the BIG SHOW! In a No DQ Match! And this time… if John Cena interferes, I will strip him of the WWE Championship!

    -Triple H leaves, as the crowd reacts to hearing tonight’s main event between Ric Flair and Big Show.-

    JimRoss: What a way to start off the show. Love him or hate him, King, Triple H makes one hell of a Raw President.

    JerryLawler: I guess Edge will have to wait a week before getting some answers from Christian Cage. At least he’ll see next week, which is more then I can say for Flair.

    DeShaun Christian & Mickie James vs Stevie Richards & Victoria

    You Ready!?.....Lets Go!

    This is 10% Luck

    20% Skill

    15% Concentrated Power of Will

    5% Pleasure

    50% Pain

    and 100% Reason to Remember the Name

    Just as the last line plays, DeShaun Christian steps through the curtains with girlfriend Mickie James. DSC and his girl stands on the ramp and looks out at the fans. After a few moments he begins to walk down to the ring. Once at the ring, he jogs the last couple of steps and hops off one leg onto the apron with the other leg. He holds onto the top rope and steps between the top and middle rope. As soon as he enters the ring, he pauses and looks out at the crowd, soaking up the reaction one final time. Victoria and Mickie begin the match, with inter-gender rules applied. The two divas lock up, and its James who gains the early advantage sending Victoria into the ropes. Vickie bounces off the ropes, and runs into the waiting arms of James, who scoops up Victoria and drops her onto the canvas with a ‘Bum Buster’, before laying in with right hands to the head of Vickie. The fans love it, as Mickie pulls off and celebrates with the crowd. Victoria wastes no time, rolling over and tagging in Stevie Richards. By rule, Stevie Richards is suppose to let Mickie James tag in DeShaun, but Stevie drills Mickie with a forearm shot from behind, not allowing this to happen by drilling James from behind, with brings a lot of heat on him from the crowd. Stevie picks up James, who rolls out of the way and lunges towards her corner, tagging in DeShaun! The crowd gives a huge pop, as DSC springboards into the ring nailing Richards with a dropkick in the process. DeShaun screams at Richards to get to his feet, and once there, DeShaun lays in with right hands to the head sending Richards falling back into the corner. DeShaun motions for something before charging the corner. The Playboy flies through the air and drills Stevie with the Playboy Splash! Stevie staggers out from the corner, and DeShaun seems to be moments away from putting on his finisher, but pauses and points over to his girl. James doesn’t waste any time coming in from behind and drilling Richards with the ‘Mick Kick’. The kick catches Stevie in the temple, and lets Mickie pick up the easy 1-2-3! The crowd gives a nice pop as the young couple celebrates the victory with Victoria fuming over the loss on the outside.

    DeShaun Christian and Mickie James DEFEATS Stevie Richards and Victoria.

    JimRoss: Impressive victory for the young couple. DeShaun Christian is really starting to make a good impression.

    JerryLawler: Yeah, but I want to see him beat someone else beside Stevie Richards. My dog could pin Stevie Richards... and he's dead.

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    Jeff Hardy vs Shelton Benjamin

    ’AINT NO STOPPIN ME NOW!’

    Shelton stomps to the ring as his opponent, Jeff Hardy is awaiting his arrival. Shelton springs up onto the apron, and steps into the ring. The bell sounds and Hardy explodes with a few lighting quick punches that catches Shelton off guard. Hardy shoves Benjamin into the ropes, but the athletic Benjamin flies off the ropes, nailing a cross body! 1-2-KICKOUT! Hardy and Shelton both roll up to their feet. Hardy explodes with that wild lariat of his that sends Shelton back down to the canvas. Hardy gives a few stomps to the body of Shelton before he can climb back up to his feet. Once more Hardy tosses Shelton into the ropes, but this time, Shelton reverses. He tosses Hardy into the ropes, but Hardy explodes with a wild lariat. Shelton is able to avoid this by performing the ‘Matrix’, a move that as soon as he pulls it off, brings praise of his atheism from Jim Ross. Hardy after totally whiffing on the move turns back slowly and receives a superkick right to the jaw from Shelton Benjamin. Hardy crashes to the canvas, as Shelton looks on with aggression. Shelton grabs Hardy by the long green hair and pulls him up, before laying into him with an upper cut. Hardy flies back into the corner. Shelton lets the crowd knows that he is in control of the match before charging at Jeff, diving with his shoulder into Hardy’s gut. After this, Shelton springs to his feet, delivering a knee to the gut. Afterwards Shelton begins to jaw with a few fans at ringside, who are obviously Pro Jeff Hardy. At this point Hardy is slumped over, the only thing keeping him up is his arm, which is wrapped over the ropes. Shelton looks over his shoulder for a moment. He then leaps onto the middle rope, before executing a ‘Monkey Flip’ that sends Hardy flying through the air, and crashing hard on the canvas. Shelton is totally full of himself at this point, as he walks over to Hardy and gives him a stiff slap across the face. This brings out the boo birds from the fans, who normally are on Shelton’s side. The grin on Shelton’s face tells us that he doesn’t mind being booed; in fact it appears he likes it. Shelton gives a stomp right to the face of Hardy, which it appears was done out of no reason, other then to draw heat from the crowd. Shelton give Hardy the chance to climb back up to his feet, before leaping high into the air and drilling Jeff Hardy in the face with a dropkick! Shelton rolls out onto the apron. Shelton pulls himself up to his feet and waits on the apron patiently as Jeff Hardy pulls himself up to his feet. Once finally on his feet, Shelton leaps up onto the ropes and flies towards Hardy. Jeff is able to catch Shelton flying through the air however, and grabs Shelton by the skull, before executing his patented sit-out jawbreaker! Shelton crashes to the canvas in pain, as the crowd gives a pop realizing this is now anyone’s match once again. Jeff Hardy picks himself off the canvas and waits as Shelton is making his way to his feet. Hardy delivers a swinging right hand that catches Shelton in the jaw. Hardy delivers a second shot that catches Shelton in the exact same spot. Hardy then spins around, ala Scott Hall, before leveling Shelton with that wild lariat of his! Shelton crashes to the canvas, as Hardy wastes no time staying on the offensive. He bounces off the ropes, dropping a leg drop like he was the Hulkster! Hardy goes for the quick cover, 1-2-KICKOUT! Hardy can’t believe it, thinking he had the match won. Hardy pulls Shelton up and shoves him into the ropes. Shelton bounces off the ropes, and Hardy is able to lift him up and over, with a back body drop! Shelton bounces off the canvas very hard, and isn’t liking the beating he is taking one bit. Shelton crawls back into the corner, resting on the bottom turnbuckle. Hardy sees this, and instead of giving Shelton a time out, he charges, landing a sit down dropkick. Shelton’s head bounces off the middle turnbuckle with little to no give what so ever. Hardy stays on the attack, as he grabs Shelton and pulls him up to his feet. Hardy unleashes a Flair-esque chop, then tosses Shelton into the ropes, however Shelton is able to reverse it and send Hardy into the ropes. Hardy explodes with a wild lariat once more, but Shelton rolls out of the way at the last moment. Hardy is slow in turning around, and by the time he does Shelton is able to land a superkick that catches the jaw of the former Intercontinental Champion! Hardy stumbles back into the corner, which gives Shelton the chance to fly through the air connecting with his SHELTON SPLASH! Hardy stumbles out from the corner, and that’s when Shelton drills the T-BONE and the 1-2-3!

    Shelton Benjamin DEFEATS Jeff Hardy

    JimRoss: Nice impressive win by Shelton Benjamin. He really needed this win to help establish himself again as a legit threat to the Intercontinental Championship.

    JerryLawler: Indeed, and its nice to see him do so without the help of his mama.

    [- ‘The Konfederacy celebrating their Rumble VICTORY?!?!? -]

    -We fade backstage where the lovable Maria is standing next to Raw’s newest Tag Team, AG Wright, and his brother Kodi Wright.-

    Maria: With me now is the newest tag team to Raw, the Konfederacy! Andrew, last night didn’t go as you would have liked but…

    AG Wright: Maria… you silly little ball of ignorance, last night was a success for the Konfederacy! It was an overwhelming success!

    Maria: Really? But you didn’t win the rumble.

    AG Wright: Oh, but you see Maria, last night wasn’t a success because we achieved victory. No, you see we are winners tonight, because of who DIDN’T win the Royal Rumble. Our plan last night wasn’t to achieve victory, but to prevent our opposition from achieving theirs! Last night, my brother, Kodi, and me eliminated the biggest ‘colored’ threat to the Royal Rumble, Bobby Lashley! Because of us, tonight we all have a Royal Rumble winner in Randy Orton that we can be proud of!

    Kodi Wright: WRIGHT POWER!

    -Boos erupts from the crowd at the racist comments.-

    AG Wright: But tonight Maria… tonight isn’t about fighting the good fight. Tonight, is personal. Tonight is about me, and brother Kodi going after the WWE Tag Team Championships….

    Kodi Wright: WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    AG Wright: Tonight, Rob Van Dam, and Sabu are about to witness exactly what Jim Ross means, when he says that this match is about to be a ‘slobber-knocker’, because we are going to you what fighting ‘dirty’… is all about.

    Kodi Wright: WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    AG Wright: Sabu…. Rob Van Dam… You’ve Been Warned!

    Kodi Wright: WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    WWE Tag Team Championship:

    ©Rob Van Dam & Sabu vs The Konfederacy

    WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    Boos fill the arena as out walks one of the most controversial new tag teams that the WWE has had in decades. They emerge through a fiery entrance and pause at the top of the ramp, taking in the entire arena. They finally make their way down to the ring in the typical black robes…oddly enough. The twin brothers roll into the ring and give the old Nazi salute as Kodi Wright screams out ‘Wright Power’ three times. This music is finally cut off as the sounds of the WWE Tag Team Champion’s begin to play. The crowd chants ‘Rob….Van….Dam’ as RVD and Sabu emerge from the back and make their way down the ramp. RVD and Sabu both roll right into the ring and go after the challengers, who choose to delay their in ring debut a few more moments, by bailing out of the ring. RVD and Sabu take the time to play up to the crowd some more, raising their tag team title belts high into the air. RVD hands the belts to the ref, but turns his back on his challengers, which proves to be a mistake. AG slides into the ring, clubbing RVD from behind, and sending him crashing to the canvas. The bell sounds to begin the match, and AG is wasting no time stomping away at the downed WWE Tag Champion. Wright pulls Rob Van Dam up to his feet and gives him a straight jab to the jaw of RVD, sending the Tag Champ falling back into the corner. AG explodes with a ‘Flair like’ chop across the chest of Rob Van Dam, which brings out a small ‘Woooo’ from the crowd. Wright grabs a hold of Rob Van Dam’s chest, and tosses him over with a hip toss. However due to the incredible athletic ablity of RVD, Van Dam lands on his feet. AG Wright is stunned by this, and gives Rob Van Dam the opening he needs to connect with a spinning heel kick that catches AG in the jaw! RVD is quick to stay on the offense, as he rolls up to his feet. He bounces off the ropes, and does his classic rolling on the canvas, however instead of landing a rolling thunder on AG Wright, he explodes with that unorthodox style that is only his, and lands a shot to the face of Kodi Wright, sending the big man off the apron. RVD then springs up to the top rope with a SPLIT LEGGED MOONSAULT! RVD makes the cover 1-2-KICKOUT! RVD seems to be in total control of the match at this point, as he pulls AG Wright up to his feet. RVD tosses Wright across the ring and back towards his corner, or at least tries. However AG Wright reverse the move and sends RVD back into their corner. Rob Van Dam rams head first into the turnbuckle, and is taken down quickly with a chop block from AG Wright, who quickly tags in the larger of the two, Kodi. Kodi enters the ring and wastes no time stomping away at RVD who is down on the canvas grabbing the knee that was just illegally chop blocked. The big man, grabs Rob Van Dam by the hair, pulling him up to his feet, before exploding with a shoulder thrust that pancakes RVD into the turnbuckle. RVD stumbles out from the corner, and this gives Kodi the chance to explode with a power house clothesline that sends Rob Van Dam crashing to the canvas. Sabu has seen enough. He charges into the ring and drills Kodi from behind with a club to the back of the head. The cameras pan around to find the other Wright Brother, and we find Andy Wright resting up against the announce table trying to catch his breath. Sabu mean while is in the ring clubbing away on the power house, Kodi Wright. Sabu tosses Kodi across the ring. After bouncing off the ropes, Sabu drills Kodi with a dropkick, that sends him staggering, but not off his feet! Sabu gives a stiff shot to the face of Kodi, which sends him staggering even more, but still is able to stay on his feet. Sabu gives one more shot to the face of Kodi, and then charges across the ring. He vaults up onto the top rope and lunges FORWARD! He lunges right at AG Wright, who spots Sabu and dives out of the way just in time! Sabu crashes onto the announce table and falls right to the floor. Back in the ring, Rob Van Dam climbs the ropes as well, but instead of going after AG, he elects to us his energy to try and win the match, executing a Van Daminator on Kodi Wright. Back on the outside, AG Wright picks up Sabu by the hair and slings him across the outside, crashing into the steel steps! Sabu crashes to the floor, as AG falls to his knees from exhaustion. Back in the ring Rob Van Dam is crawling over to the ropes, with Kodi completely knocked out. However Rob Van Dam is totally exhausted at this point. He has been in the ring for the entire time, and has no hope of tagging in his partner, with Sabu wasted on the floor below. Rob Van Dam pulls himself up to his feet, and realizes that he has to do something major in order to retain the Tag Team straps. He charges the turnbuckle, leaping up onto the top rope. He positions himself and waits for Kodi to climb up to his feet. Once the big man has reach his feet, RVD leaps off with a cross body! However the powerhouse from south, catches Rob Van Dam in mid air! He hoists him up in the air, as AG comes flying into the ring with their version of the old ‘Hart-to-Hart’ that they call the ‘En-Lynch-Ment’. Rob Van Dam crashes to the canvas, as Kodi makes the cover. AG looks on to make sure Sabu doesn’t interfere but Sabu is totally motionless on the outside. 1-2-3! New Tag Champs! The crowd erupts into a loud chorus of boos as the ref hands the Konfederacy the WWE Tag Team Championship Belts! The two brothers begin to celebrate wildly.

    The Konfederacy DEFEATS Rob Van Dam & Sabu to win the WWE Tag Team Champions!

    JimRoss: Oh my lord! The fans are going to be a buzz now that these outspoken gentlemen, who I totally do not agree with, are wearing gold.

    JerryLawler: I can’t stand these jerks. I hope Triple H strips them of the belts.

    JimRoss: I certain don’t support their politics, but I doubt Trips would do that. However if he was, I don’t think many people would shed a tear.

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    [- ‘The Classic Story of When Harry Met MELINA? -]

    -Raw returns as the red carpet is rolled out down the entrance ramp. The crowd rises to their feet as…

    -Lightbulbs begin to flash all over the entrance ramp...-

    **FLASH**--**FLASH**--**FLASH**

    The entrance ramp continues erupt with flashing lights, emulating the flashes from paparazzi cameras. After a few moments, the flashes subside, and out walk Johnny Nitro and Melina. The red carpet lays out flat in front of them, as they pause at the top of the ramp, and give their classic pose for the WWE Nation in the arena tonight. The hot young couple, walk down to the ring, where Melinda enters the ring in her own special way, showing her incredible flexibility by entering the ring split legged, then climbs up on the ropes and allowing Nitro to slide into the ring between her spread legs. After a few moments to pose for the cameras, there is a barber who motions for Melina to take a seat at the barber’s chair set up in the ring. Melina shakes her head no wildly, as Johnny steps in between the barber and Melina, physically threatening him. The barber just shrugs and backs off, as Melina shakes her head, refusing to sit in the barber’s seat. She finally asks for a mic.

    Melina: I know Johnny Nitro lost at the Royal Rumble, and I know Triple H has said that I have to follow through with this, but there is NO WAY I am shaving my head. I mean seriously, does anyone really want to see me BALD?

    -The crowd erupts into a loud ovation of cheers as Melina looks on in horror. –

    Melina: Well its not happening! I’m not going too…

    I SPIT IN THE FACE... OF PEOPLE WHO DONT WANT TO BE COOL!

    Carlito: Hey! Hey! Hey! You lost! Now deal with it! Sit in the chair, and ….

    Melina: Come on Carlito. There has to be something I can do besides save my head…

    -Melina moves over towards Carlito very seductively, running her finger down his chest. Carlito looks on in confusion.-

    Carlito: So you want to sleep with Carlito?

    Melina: No. I was just..

    Carlito: Good, cause Carlito can sleep with a hot chick any time, but its not every day, Carlito gets to see a chick shave her head. Now go!

    -The grin on Carlito’s face grows wide as he walks over to the barber and turns on the shaver. -

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    Carlito: That’s cool. Now come on chica. Sit here, let Harold shave your head… by the way, what kind of name is Harold? Should you be Harry or something?

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    -Melina’s face is filled with horror as she hides behind Nitro, the sounds of the shaver sending chills down her spine.-

    Johnny Nitro: Come on, Carlito. I lost, not her. Punish me.

    Carlito: Why? I’ve seen bald dufases like you all the time. Carlito wants to see a bald chick!

    -Carlito turns on the shaver again, drawing a huge pop from the crowd. ‘Zzzzzzzzz’.-

    Melina: Come on Carlito. I’ll do anything, just don’t make me shave my head. Please!

    Carlito: Anything?

    Melina: Yes! Please, anything.

    Carlito: Ok, then how about this. You be my slave till Wrestlemania. You have to do everything Carlito says. If you don’t…

    -Carlito turns on the shaver… ‘Zzzzzzzzz’. –

    Melina: Be your slave?

    Carlito: Either that, or you’ll have to wear a hat till summer.

    Johnny Nitro: No, Carlito. My girlfriend isn’t going to be your slave! Not for a day. Not for a week. Not for a month! Not will Wrestlemania. Never!

    Carlito: Ok, dat’s cool. Harold, shave her!

    -Carlito explodes forward, drilling Johnny Nitro in the skull with the IC title belt. Carlito then rolls out of the ring as refs pour into the ring and pshyicall force Melina into the chair. Harold turnson the shaver, ‘Zzzzzzzzzzz’, but moments before he begins Melina screams out. –

    Melina: OK! OK! OK! I’ll do it.

    -Carlito stops in his tracks. He turns back towards the ring.-

    Carlito: So you’ll be Carlito’s slave till Wrestlemania?

    Melina: Yes…..

    -Carlito drops the mic and grows that cocky smirk all over his face. He backtracks up the entrance ramp, leaving Melina crying in the barber’s chair.-

    JimRoss: Oh my lord! Melina has to be Carlito's slave till Wrestlemania! I can only imagine the things Carlito has in store for Melina.

    JerryLawler: I don't even want to think about it. Poor Melina. I've got a lap she can try in.

    JimRoss: Don't you mean a shoulder for her to cry on?

    JerryLawler: No.

    ::COMMERICIAL BREAK::

    [- ‘The ShowStopper.... Stopping The Show? -]

    You Think I’m Cute…I Know I’m Sexy

    I’m a SEXY BOY

    I Ain’t No Toy

    Shawn’s theme picks up as the hometown hero makes his way out onto the stage. He begins to make his way down the ramp, not even pausing for his traditional fireworks. Michaels climbs up the steps and enters the ring. He takes his spot at center stage and gives a long hard look around the arena.-

    Shawn Michaels: You know, I don’t have controversial to say tonight like I hate black people, or I enjoy seeing chicks bald….

    -Michaels gives that look that is classic Michaels, where he pulls a ‘shoot’ comment out of no where, and really for no other reason then he can.-

    Shawn Michaels: But I do want to come out here and make an announcement. As most of you know, my contract runs out at the end of next month, and I’ve chosen not to renew my deal with the WWE. This is by far the hardest decision I have ever had to make because for the first time in my life, I’m not walking away because of an injury. No, this time the reason I am walking away is simple… wrestling just isn’t fun for me anymore. Last night proved it. I battled the Undertaker in a one on one match, and just couldn’t get ‘up’ for the match. Back in the day, I would have been high for a week before a match like that, yet even yesterday as I was making my way down the ramp, in front of my hometown fans, I just didn’t feel the juices flowing. I’m sorry. I wish I was still interested in doing this, but the fact is that wrestling no longer interest me. So to everyone who has supported me throughout my years, I thank you. To all the boys in back, both friend and foe, thank you. And to the lord, Jesus Christ who has given the greatest opportunity in the world, to live out a boy hood dream. Thank You.

    -With that, Michaels exits the ring. No last trip around the ring. No acknowledgement to the crowd, he’s just gone.-

    JimRoss: Wow. What can I say that can possibly measure up to what just happened.

    JerryLawler: Ah, he’ll be back.

    JimRoss: I hope so King. I really do.

    No Disqualification Match

    Ric Flair vs The Big Show w/ 'The Game' Triple H

    ANNOUNCER: Our final match of the evening is the MAIN EVENT! This match is set for one fall, with no disqualifications! Introducing first, accomplied by the Raw President, Triple H… he is the largest athlete in the World…. THE BIG SHOW!!!!!

    Well.....

    IT’S THE BIG SHOW

    The Big Show and Triple H emerge from the back and make their way down to the ring as the fans boo the hell out of them. Jim Ross keeps telling us that something smells fishy about this whole situation, future proving that he had to get his education at the University of Oklahoma, because only there would you learn skills required to realize that this match isn’t on the ‘up and up’. The Big Show enters the ring by stepping over the top rope, and motioning for the chokeslam, as Triple H takes his spot at ringside.

    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    ANNOUNCER: And his opponent, from Charlotte, NC, he is the sixteen time, World Heavyweight Champion. He is the ‘Nature Boy’, RIC FLAIR!!!!!

    The sounds echo throughout the arena as the former sixteen times World Champion makes his way out onto the entrance ramp. As soon as he hits the entrance ramp the arena fills with ‘Woooo calls. Flair echoes the calls with a ‘Woooo’ of his own, then raises the four-finger salute. Flair makes his way down to the ring, and judging by the expression on his face, realizes the battle he is able to endure. Flair walks up the steel steps and steps into the ring. The ref disrobes him, as Flair gets ready for the match up. Flair begins to stretch, and gives a death stare at Triple H. This however gives Big Show an opening to attack Flair while distracted, a measure he takes full advantage of. Show explodes with a club to the back of the neck of Flair, sending him crashing into the corner. The icon falls into the corner, not able to avoid the attack from behind. Big Show takes aim and explodes with a right elbow that at the very least squashes Flair in the corner. Big Show repeats this again, and again, and again. A grand total of five times. The Big Show grabs the living legend, and tosses him high in the air, then watches as Flair crashes helplessly to the canvas. Flair rolls around for a moment selling the bump, and this allows Big Show to take a few steps towards Flair, before dropping down on him with a massive body squash. Big Show covers 1-2-KICKOUT! Flair gets a shoulder up as Jim Ross says that he doesn’t know what Flair’s game play is, but that the better start executing it fast, or he will be the one who is executed. The Raw President applauds Big Show from the outside as his monster climbs back up to his feet. Big Show snatches Flair by the head and pulls him up to his feet. Big Show grabs Flair by the throat, and all indications are that he is going for the ‘Chokeslam’, however at this exact moment Flair executes one of his desperation ‘Low Blows’ to the Big Show. Flair being an expert at the art of ‘dirty tatics’ was able to position the ref to where he wouldn’t see a thing, though he suspected something was up. Never the less, the ref couldn’t do a thing about it and the Big Show tumbles over to his knees in pain. Ric Flair explodes with shot after shot to the forehead of the Big Show, before dealing a final right hand that sends the Big Show crashing to the canvas. The Big Show is down! The crowd is rocking at this point, as the Big Show lays on the canvas with the Nature Boy in total control of the match. Flair begins to do his classic strut, and lets out a ‘Woooo’ to the fans of the AT&T Center. Flair turns his attention back towards the Big Show, but is given a kick to the gut. PEDIGREE! Triple H delivers the ‘Pedigree’ to his former mentor, and seeing how the match is No DQ, there is nothing the ref can do about it. The Game rolls out of the ring as the Big Show slowly begins to climb back to his feet. The Big Show goes for the pin, but the Game tells him not yet. Jim Ross questions his motivates, until they are made crystal clear when Trips reveals his sledgehammer, before rolling into the ring himself. The Game instructs Big Show to pull Flair up to his feet, to which the monster obeys. The Big Show has Flair by the throat, holding him place, as the Raw President explodes with a sledgehammer shot right to the face! The shot knocks Flair’s head out of the grasp of the Big Show, and sends him crashing back down to the canvas. Big Show goes to pick him up, but Trips shoves Big Show away, and proceeds to drive the sledgehammer into the skull of the Nature Boy. Jim Ross screams out that “this isn’t right dammit!”, but the damage has already been done. Flair is totally busted open, his face nothing more then a crimson mask. HHH instructs Show to finish him. Big Show grabs Flair, by the now bloodied hair, and pulls him up, before lifting him high in the air. CHOKESLAM! 1-2-3! Big Show picks up an easy win, as boos pour down upon the ring. However the boos are turned around into cheers with the sounds of…

    WORD LIFE!

    Its Just Basic Thuganomics....

    The crowd erupts as John Cena explodes from the back. Now that the match is over with, his ‘no interference’ clause is not in effect and he wastes no time charging down to the ring. The WWE Champ slides under the bottom rope and drills Big Show right in the face, staggering the big man. Cena delivers a second shot, a third, fourth, and a fifth sends the Big Show stumbling backwards, and actually tumbling out of the ring! Cena explodes with rage as he rips off his throwback jersey and tosses it into the stands. Cena turns around to find the Game, but its too late as the Game plasters Cena with the spinner WWE Championship. Cena crashes to the canvas as the Game stands over Cena holding the WWE Championship. The Big Show slowly makes it back up to his feet, but sees that the Game is in no real danger so heads up the ramp, leaving the Raw President standing in the middle of the ring staring down at the motionless WWE Champion, and his bloodied former mentor.

    The Big Show DEFEATS Ric Flair

    JimRoss: Oh my lord! Look at the carnage that has been left in the wake of Triple H's wraith!

    JerryLawler: John Cena and Ric Flair are a mess! Flair may be broken in half!

  12. Very good start to this diary. I love the idea of what if Owen Hart would have won. Its something that caught my attention, and interests me as to where you'll go with it.

    THE PREDICTIONS:

    Mr. Backlund VS ???

    -Though I never cared much for the idiot, Mr. Backlund was a semi big name during this time, if I remember correctly. Unless the name you have signed is huge, I don't think he should drop this one.

    Doink the Clown VS Tatanka

    -Doink is one of the best pre-attitude characters the WWF ever did, in my opinion. You are handling him well, and I hope keep pushing him.

    The Headshrinkers VS Bam Bam Bigelow/IRS

    - BAM! BAM! BAM!... actually I can't remember much about the Headshrinkers, so I'm gonna go with BBB and IRS.

    British Bulldog VS Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart

    I think the Bulldog is on the verge of pulling the bullgod... and no that's not a typo. A loss here would hurt him, more then it would help the 'Anvil', who is a life long mid carder. I hope Bulldog wins .

    Diesel/??? VS The Steiner Brothers (For the WWF Tag Team Titles)

    -Diesel really needs to drop this match, so that you can start pushing him towards a single's career, but I have a feeling you may have something up your sleeve in the form of a former 'Kliq' member, so I went with Nash.

    Lex Luger VS Crush

    -I would laugh if Luger lost... but thats just because I despise the character so much.

    Razor Ramon © VS "Double J" Jeff Jarrett (For the WWF Intercontinental Title)

    - I always like to go with the champ, unless theres a reason to put the title on someone else. Razor needs a bit more time, IMO, with the belt.

    "Macho Man" Randy Savage VS Yokozuna

    - Coin Flip match. I went with Savage, because I'd like for him to continue wrestling, if for no other reason, then it pro-longs the releasing of his rap album. :crying:

    "The King of Harts" Owen Hart © VS Bret "The Hitman" Hart (For the WWF Heavyweight Title)

    - I think Owen could easily lose this, but I'd like for him to keep the belt a little bit longer to help establish him as a legit main eventer.

  13. Good show. I'm marking out for Daff vs Trish at Wrestlemania, even though I have a feeling Trish may drop the title in that match. I'm actually liking the build up too between Rock and Taker at this point. Its very believable, and puts over that the two biggest 'faces' are facing off at Wrestlemania. I still hope you go the way I think you are with this match.... but Wrestlemania is looking very goood. I can't wait!

  14. Yes, congradulations to Split Second for winning the Royal Rumble Prediction Contest. I also want to thank everyone who participated, posted feedback, or have just followed my diary throughout the entire first month. I really do appreicate it. Just so no one worries about this diary dieing out, over the weekend I completed 'Wrestlemania 23', so for anyone who fears this diary may die out early, have no fear. I am well ahead of schedule.
  15. ANNOUNCER: Our final match of the evening the ROYAL RUMBLE! The rules of this match are as followed. Every two minutes a superstar will enter the ring according to the number they drew earlier in the day. Upon entering the ring, a person is eliminated when they are thrown over the top rope, and both feet touch the floor! The last man standing will be awarded the winner, and will face the brand champion of their choosing at the main event of Wrestlemania 23!

    The Time Has Come to Change My Way…

    On This Day, I See Clearly….

    Everything Has Come to Life!!!

    ANNOUNCER: Introducing first, from Toronto, Canada! He is the ‘Rated R Superstar’, EDGE!

    MainGFX2.jpg

    Edge jumps in place from side to side, attempting to stay ‘warm’, as he awaits the opponent who drew number two. ENTRANT #2: Smackdown Superstar, Chris Benoit! The crowd erupts as Chris Benoit enters the AT&T Center for the first time since losing the United States Championship to CM Punk. Benoit slides into the ring and goes right after Edge with some hard knife-edge chops to the chest of the ‘Rated R Superstar’. The bell sounds and the 2007 Royal Rumble is officially underway. Benoit and Edge exchange chops and punches for a few moments, until Benoit finally hurls Edge across the ring. Edge bounces off the ropes and soars off the ropes, nailing a flying forearm shot! Both men hit the canvas and roll around for a bit as the timer begins on the next entrant. ENTRANT #3: Raw Superstar, Shawn Michaels! The crowd erupts as the hometown favorite enters at his required third spot after losing to the Undertaker earlier in the evening. Michaels slides under the bottom rope and goes right after Edge, mounting him and beginning to whale away with forearm shots to the head, that is broken up moments later by Chris Benoit who knocks Michaels off, before mounting Edge himself and driving his fist into the face of Edge. Lita screams out from the side to stop it, but Benoit will have none of it. Edge’s only aid is when Michaels pulls Benoit off, before giving him a huge shove. The two have a stare down as the timer goes off. ENTRANT #4: Smackdown Superstar, William Regal! HBK and Benoit pay Regal no mind as then begin exchanging rights and lefts in the middle of the ring. Regal enters the ring, but figures if he is going to win the Rumble, he is going to need to save his energy, so he just sits and watches the two icons slug it out in the center of the ring. Edge however isn’t so patient and explodes from the side, drilling Michaels with a SPEAR! While on the ground, Benoit begins to lay into Edge with kicks. With Benoit distracted, Regal takes this chance and tries to dump Benoit over the top rope, grabbing him from behind! Benoit however fights as the next entrant is announced. ENTRANT #5: Raw Superstar, Shelton Benjamin! Benjamin charges towards the ring as Regal is fighting with all his might to get Benoit to break the hold. However he is unable to do so. Edge climbs back up to his feet, and gives Regal a shot to the back, breaking the hold he has on Benoit, and giving Edge time to grab Real and dump him over the ropes, eliminating him from the match! WILLIAM REGAL HAS BEEN ELIMINATED BY EDGE! Benjamin rolls into the ring and goes right after HBK, as Benoit climbs up to his feet, and gives Edge a shove wanting no help from anyone in this match. Edge gives Benoit a shove back, and the shove sends Benoit stumbling backwards. Chris ends up falling over Benjamin, who is on top of Michaels at this point. Benoit picks himself back up, but once on his feet, Edge flies over Shelton with a dropkick connecting right to Chris Benoit, sending the former champion tumbling out of the ring, and going home titleless, and without a title shot to Wrestlemania. CHRIS BENOIT HAS BEEN ELIMINATED BY EDGE! Edge mocks Benoit for a moment, as he waits for the next entrant. ENTRANT #6: Smackdown Superstar, Matt Hardy! There isn’t much question who Matt Hardy wants a piece of, as he slides into the ring and goes right after Edge. Hardy tackles him to the ground and begins to whale away on the ‘Rated R Superstar’ as Lita screams out from the side to stop it. Meanwhile on the other side, Michaels has started to mount some offense against the spunky Shelton Benjamin. Michaels lays into Shelton with a right hand, then a left. The two make a great combination on the head of Shelton, who is totally dazed at this point. Michaels lands one more punch, that sends Benjamin sailing into the ropes, but Shelton hangs on for dear life. Michaels begins to fight with Shelton, as the timer goes off. ENTRANT #7: Raw Superstar, DeShaun Christian! DSC flies out from the back and charges down to the ring. He jumps up onto the apron, but instead of helping Michaels eliminate Shelton, he actually drills Michaels in the face, then helps Shelton get back in the ring. DSC then enters the ring, and Shelton and DSC exchange handpounds. We begin to wonder what the deal is, until Jim Ross tells us that DSC and Shelton Benjamin are life long friends. Oh well, didn’t know that. The friends begin to double team on HBK, as on the other side of the ring, Matt Hardy is still taking out all of his frustrations on Edge this time he has him cornered in the corner, and whaling away with rights and lefts. ENTRANT #8: Smackdown Superstar, Gregory Helms! Gregory Helms charges down to the ring, as Ashley Massaro helps her man, vocally. Helms rolls into the ring and goes right after Hardy, drilling him from behind. Together, Helms and Edge are able to muscle Hardy up onto the top rope, and dump him over! MATT HARDY ELIMINATED BY GREGORY HELMS & EDGE! The two woman stealers exchange good jobs, but Edge sees Mick Foley slide into the ring, so he chooses to take this opportunity to drop down to the canvas, and roll out of the ring. Helms doesn’t see Mick, and wonders what is up with Edge. However as he turns around, he sees Mick, but its too late! Foley drills Helms, sending him over the top rope! GREGORY HELMS ELIMINATED BY MICK FOLEY! Foley exits the ring, and begins to beat on Helms some more as Edge watches from the side. The timer goes off once more. ENTRANT #9: Raw Superstar, Sabu! Sabu charges down to the ring, but as soon as he slides into the ring, Edge levels him with a SPEAR, upon re-entering the ring himself. Edge easily dumps Sabu over the top rope. SABU ELIMINATED BY EDGE! We span across the ring to see DSC and Shelton Benjamin fighting to get HBK out of the ring. Edge walks over and helps the brothers dump Michaels out of the ring. The three men back off towards the center of the ring to celebrate, however Michaels pulls another one out of his bags of tricks, and once more ‘skins the cat’, as J-R says, and pulls himself back into the ring. Edge sees this and backs off, however Shelton isn’t so lucky as HBK connects with some SWEET CHIN MUSIC that sends him flying over the top rope! SHELTON BENJAMIN ELIMINATED BY SHAWN MICHAELS! DeShaun Christian sees this, and tries his own version of the superkick, ‘THE OWNAGE KICK’, but misses Michaels, who grabs him and dumps his out of the ring. DESHAUN CHRISTIAN ELIMINATED BY SHAWN MICHAELS! And just like that we are down to two, Edge and HBK. The two meet in the middle of the ring, but as soon as they reach the ring, the timer goes off. ENTRANT #10 : Smackdown Superstar, Rey Mysterio Jr! If the 2006 winner wants to repeat his performance, he will have an easier draw this year starting from the 10th spot. Mysterio springs up to the apron, and springboards into the ring, catching both HBK and Edge with a Crossbody! Mysterio springs up to his feet and waits for Edge to get to his feet. Rey charges and executes a running head scissors! Edge falls head over heels and lands square on the canvas. HBK is up to his feet, but Rey is too quick for the now exhausted Michaels, and connects with a dropkick that sends Michaels flying into the middle rope. Rey gives the signal for the 619, then connects sending Michaels back into the center of the ring! Rey is on fire as the next entrant is announced. ENTRANT #11: Raw Superstar, Bobby Lashley! The entire arena gasp as Jerry Lawler announces that Bobby Lashley is his choice to win the royal rumble. Small chants of ‘LASHLEY…LASHLEY….LASHLEY’ break out throughout the crowd. Lashley rolls into the ring and explodes with a shoulder thrust that sends Edge crashing back down to the canvas, and letting him retreat into a corner. Rey Mysterio bounces off the ropes and goes flying through the air, but Lashley catches him in mid air, and drops him with a body squash! Lashley is in total control of the 2007 Royal Rumble at this point as the time goes off once more. ENTRANT #12: Smackdown Superstar, Brian Kendrick! Brian Kendrick charges down to the ring. The former co holder of the tag team titles rolls into the ring, and shows no fear going right after Lashley, but that proves to be a fatal mistake as Lashley explodes with a SPEAR that splits the cruiserweight in half! The crowd erupts at this point, believing that Lashley has a real shot of eliminating everyone left in the rumble. Lashley looks around as no one is willingly to give him a go, Michaels is down still feeling the effects from the 619. Rey Mysterio and Brian Kendrick are out from Bobby Lashley, and Edge shows that he has no plans to tangle with the big man. The timer begins to sound off, but Lashley keeps his focus on Edge and the downed superstars. ENTRANT #13: Raw Superstar, AG Wright! Out marches the brash new superstar, and he makes a beeline right for the ring. Lashley slowly turns his head towards the superstar, apparently catching the ‘Wright Brothers’ introduction earlier in the evening. Edge takes this opportunity to slide out of the ring, as does Michaels who is recovering. Mysterio and Kendrick remain in the ring, but are motionless and out of the ring. The ring is theirs alone… AG Wright and Bobby Lashley. AG Wright begins to talk smack to Lashley, telling him that he has no place in a wrestling ring. Lashley has heard enough and EXPLODES with a spear, and receives a reaction that blows the roof off of the ATT center. Lashley springs up to his feet, and pulls AG up. He lifts AG Wright above his head with a gorilla press slam, then tosses AG Wright not only over the top rope, but just about half way up the entrance ramp! AG WRIGHT ELIMINATED BY LASHLEY! Edge and Michaels both roll back into the ring, but nether seems interested in getting anything started with Lashley. ENTRANT #14: Smackdown Superstar, Co-World Tag Team Champion, Test! Test charges down to the ring, and makes a bee-line for Brian Kendrick. The nearly seven footer going after an exhausted cruiserweight draws a TON of heat from the crowd, and the reaction gets worse, when Test dumps Kendrick over the top rope. BRIAN KEDNRICK ELIMINATED BY TEST! Test talks trash towards Kendrick, but as he turns around Bobby Lashley explodes with a shoulder thrust, sending Test over the top rope, TEST HAS BEEN ELIMINATED BY LASHLEY! Lashley looks around for a challenger as he waits for the timer to go off. ENTRANT #15: Raw Superstar, Kodi Wright! Once again, HBK and Edge clear the ring, this time Rey joins him, leaving the ring totally empty as Kodi Wright enters the ring. Kodi is more worried then his brother AG was, however that doesn’t stop him from entering the ring. Kodi screams out ‘WRIGHT POWER” towards Lashley, but that is the last thing he will ever say in the 2007 Royal Rumble because Lashley explodes with a SPEAR sending Kodi over the top rope, and luckily for the rest of the field of the Rumble, also himself, when he tumbles over the top as well. Kodi jumps up to his feet and acts like he won the thing, celebrating the fact that Lashley was eliminated. ENTRANT #16: Smackdown Superstar, Co- World Tag Team Champion, Hardcore Holly! HBK and Edge exchange looks of relief, realizing the first big threat has been eliminated to the match. They slide into the ring and await Hardcore Holly, however as soon as Holly enters the ring, he is dumped out of the ring from behind! His attacker is none other then former tag team champion, Paul London! HARDCORE HOLLY ELIMINATED BY PAUL LONDON! Hardcore chases London up the entrance ramp, as HBK and Edge look at one another, and proceed to meet at the middle of the ring. They begin to exchange punches as the timer gets ready to go off. ENTRANT #17: Raw Superstar, Stevie Richards! Richards charges down to the ring, as HBK and Edge continue to assault one another. Once Richards slides into the ring, they stop for a moment. Edge and HBK exchange looks, then HBK nods and explodes with some ‘Sweet Chin Music’! After Richards tumbles over the top rope, HBK and Edge go back to fighting. STEVIE RICHARDS ELIMINATED BY SHAWN MICHAELS! Michaels and Edge both land picture perfect punches, before HBK finally nails on that sends Edge tumbling. HBK leaps into the air, and connects with a beautiful dropkick that sends Edge crashing to the canvas. Both men rise to their feet as the timer goes off once more. ENTRANT #18: Raw Superstar, Eugene! Eugene charges down to the ring, and once more HBK and Edge exchange looks. Edge this time is the one who nods, and drills Eugene with a dropkick that sends him tumbling over the top rope. Edge climbs back up to his feet, and him and Michaels go back to exchanging punches. EUGENE ELIMINATED BY EDGE! Michaels and Edge continue to exchange punches, without either man really giving an inch. They continue to hammer it out till finally the next timer goes off. ENTRANT #19: Smackdown Superstar, The Sandman! The Sandman charges down to the ring with that Singapore cane! Both HBK and Edge exchange looks one more time, then after seeing Sandman with that cane, both drop to the canvas and roll out of the ring as Sandman takes aim at each of them! The crowd loves it, as Sandman comes to the ring with his classic cane and smokes! Out of nowhere flies Rey Mysterio who springboards off the apron and lands with a dropkick to the Sandman, sending him over the top rope! SANDMAN ELIMINATED BY REY MYSTERIO! Luckily for Sandman, he got to keep his cigarette. HBK and Edge wait on the outside of the ring as the timer goes off. ENTRANT #20: Smackdown Superstar, Kane!The arena explodes with red pyros as Kane makes his way out onto the stage and head down towards the ring. HBK and Edge look across the ring at one another, realizing another huge threat has just entered the rumble. Kane steps over the top rope and as soon as he does, both HBK and Edge attack. Kane lifts the boot and catches Edge, square in the jaw, sending him crashing to the canvas. HBK drills Kane from the side, but Kane answers with an uppercut that connects with HBK. Kane sends another uppercut towards Shawn, before tossing him into the ropes. Edge rolls up to his feet and charges at Kane with a SPEAR! Edge misses Kane, as the big man side steps the on-coming Edge, but the Rated R Superstar connects with HBK spearing him to the canvas. Edge pops back up, but is leveled with a huge ‘Chokeslam from Hell’. Kane has cleared the ring! Kane looks up at the entrance ramp as the timer counts down. Entrant #21, Raw Superstar, Rob Van Dam! RVD explodes out of the back and charges down to the ring. He slides into the ring and goes toe to toe with the big red machine, however he is unable to win this battle of punches, with Kane taking control of the match. Kane tosses RVD across the ring, however RVD explodes with a flying forearm shot. Kane staggers back into the ropes, then out of no where flies Rey Mysterio with a hurricarana sending Kane over the top rope, however at the same time eliminating himself! KANE ELIMINATED BY REY MYSTERIO! Rey pounds the mat in frustration as he has also eliminated himself with the move. REY MYSTERIO IS ELIMINATED! RVD looks around in shock as both Edge and HBK are motionless on the canvas. RVD signals for the five star frog splash, as the timer begins to count down. Entrant #22, Smackdown Superstar, Fit Finlay! Finlay charges down to the ring, and jumps up on the apron beside RVD, who is wanting to execute his high flying finisher on either HBK or Edge, and who knows, possibly both. However we’ll never know because Finlay gives RVD a shove, off the top rope and watches RVD crash to the floor. ROB VAN DAM ELIMINATED BY FIT FINLAY! Being a man who is more interested in fighting, then glorification, Finlay goes after RVD. He begins to pound away at the forehead of Rob Van Dam, with HBK and Edge still motionless in the middle of the ring. The timer begins once more as Finlay shows no signs of wanting to enter the ring, seemly much more content with beating up RVD on the outside. Entrant #23, Raw Superstar, Johnny Nitro! Nitro charges out from the back, seeing both Edge and HBK down. He rolls into the ring and looks at both with a gleeful expression. Finlay goes to enter the ring, but the refs tell him that his spot is disqualified because he didn’t enter the ring in time. Finlay throws his hands up in the air and enters the ring anyways. He grabs that damn sheliegh and levels Johnny Nitro from behind. With is work now done, Finlay seems happy and leaves the ring with having laid a beating on two people. Tazz makes a wise comment about if he is ever in a dark alley fight again, he sure as hell wants Finlay on his side. The camera pans back into the ring to show all three men, Nitro, HBK, and Edge motionless. Entrant #24, Smackdown Superstar, Chavo Guerrero! Chavo’s music hits as Chavo steps out onto the entrance ramp. Upon seeing the nephew of Eddie Guerrero, the entire arena erupts into a loud chorus of boos, which catches Chavo off guard. Chavo seems deeply hurt by this reaction, as the fans grow in reaction. A chant of ‘Chavo Sucks, Chavo Sucks’ breaks out. Chavo stands at the top of the entrance ramp for a long time, broken hearted. He finally throws his hands up in the air, and heads back behind the curtains. In the ring, Johnny Nitro begins to stir, as both HBK and Edge roll out onto the floor to catch their breath. Entrant #25, Raw Superstar, Intercontinental Champion, Carlito! The crowd erupts as the ‘King of Cool’ makes his way out onto the entrance ramp. Carlito mocks Melina as he motions in a shaving motion towards Melina. She shakes her head violently, screaming NO! Nitro has climbed up to his feet at this point as Carlito rolls into the ring. Carlito begins to lay in with right hands to the jaw of Nitro who can do nothing but attempt to cover up. Carlito tosses Nitro into the ropes, then nails him with a dropkick upon his return! Nitro crashes to the canvas in obvious pain, as Melina screams out from the apron to get up! Carlito once more begins to mock her, teasing her about being bald. Entrant #26, Smackdown Superstar, United States Champion, CM Punk! CM Punk explodes into the ring and goes right after Carlito who is distracted. Punk gives a stiff kick to the back of Carlito, sending him into the ropes. Punk lifts Carlito up, and helps him over the top rope, watching as Carlito is eliminated just a matter of a few feet away from Melina. CARLITO ELIMINATED BY CM PUNK! Punk turns his attention towards Nitro who is still dazed. Punk delivers a series of stiff kicks, the last of which is a STIFF enziguri kick that catches Nitro square behind the head. On the outside, Melina is still laying into Carlito for being eliminated. Carlito explodes onto his feet, and lands Melina with a huge sloppy kiss, shutting her up in her tracks. Carlito back pedals up the entrance ramp, giving a wink at Melina who is speechless, and horror filled. She doesn’t even notice that Punk eliminates her man, right behind her. JOHNNY NITRO ELIMINATED BY CM PUNK! Back in the ring, Punk has cleared the ring. He throws up his ‘Straight Edge’ sign, and plays up to the crowd for a bit. However as he turns around, he receives some ‘SWEET CHIN MUSIC’ by Shawn Michaels, sending him tumbling over the top rope, eliminating the United States Champion. CM PUNK ELIMINATED BY SHAWN MICHAELS! Punk hits the mat, and pops right back up to the floor. He gives Michaels a death stare, before pounding the apron and heading back up the entrance ramp. Entrant #27, Raw Superstar, The Big Show! HBK looks up in horror as the seven-foot monster, who no doubly was given a better spot by the Raw President for his help in the WWE Championship match… all be it in a losing effort. Big Show steps over the ropes and enters the ring. Michaels realizes his time is now numbered, but goes out fighting like a man. He gives Big Show a stiff shot to the face, followed by a second, third, and fourth! He actually has the Big Man dazed! Big Show is stumbling! Michaels begins to lay in some more with the right hands, hoping to gain one more elimination, however it is all for not, because the Big Show snatches Michaels by the head, and slamming their skulls together. Michaels crashes to the canvas after the violent headbutt as the timer begins to sound off. Entrant #28, Smackdown Superstar, Ken Kennedy! Kennedy rushes down to the ring. He leaps onto the apron, then leaps up onto the shoulders of the Big Show, applying a sleeper hold! Big Show fights the hold, as Kennedy holds on for dear life. Show is finally able to grab a hold of Kennedy and toss him over his shoulder, and crashing into the canvas. Kennedy springs up to his feet, but is snatched by the neck of the Big Show, and lifted high in the air! ‘CHOKESLAM!’ Over the top rope! KEN KENNEDY IS ELIMINATED BY THE BIG SHOW! Show ‘Chokeslams’ Kennedy of the top rope, and hard onto the floor below. Show looks around at the carnage in the ring, with both Michaels and Edge not moving, however sees that the timer is counting down, so he waits. Entrant #29, Raw Superstar, Randy Orton! It could only be this man… the final Raw Superstar remaining, the Legend Killer Randy Orton. Orton rolls down into the ring but is snatched right away by the throat from the Big Show. Orton realizes his time in the rumble may be numbered, so he goes with a desperation move, and delivers a kick to the groin of the Big Show! Success! Show releases the hold, and slumps over…RKO! RKO! RKO! Show is knocked out, and Orton springs up to his feet, acting like he won the match already. He turns and spots Edge waiting on him. Edge charges, but yet again Orton is able to side step his tag team partner, and watches as Edge crashes head first into the apron, much to the displeasure of sexpot Lita. Edge stumbles around, and is dropped by Orton with an RKO! RKO! RKO! Orton springs to his feet, and begins to celebrate with everyone in the ring leveled. The timer begins to sound, as Orton looks towards the entrance ramp, awaiting his final challenger. Entrant #30, Smackdown Superstar, The Undertaker! The Undertaker enters the ring and immediately begins exchanging right hands with the Legend Killer. The Undertaker wins this battle eventually, and sends Orton flying backwards, right into the awaiting arms of the Big Show, who snatches him up and sends him crashing back down to the canvas with a ‘Chokeslam’. Orton rolls out of the ring, as the Big Show and the Undertaker stand toe to toe in the middle of the ring. For all sakes and purposes, this is the battle that will determine the Royal Rumble winner. Big Show starts it off with a right hand to the Undertaker, but the Dead Man responds with a shot of his own. Big Show responds to the Undertaker’s response. However the Dead Man unleashes an unholy assault of rapid punches to the jaw of the Big Show that dazes the seven foot monster! The Big Show begins to stagger, and that is when the Dead Man explodes with a boot to the face, that sends Big Show tumbling over the top rope, and landing on the floor below! THE BIG SHOW ELIMINATED BY THE UNDERTAKER! The Undertaker looks around and realizes he is one of the final four men remaining, and in the enviable position of being the last man standing. Both Edge and Michaels are barely moving, with Randy Orton completely out of it. The Undertaker takes aim at enemy Shawn Michaels. Grabbing Michaels by the hair, he pulls HBK to his feet, then lifts him up in a tombstone position… TOMBSTONE! The Undertaker drives Michaels’ head into the canvas with that sick finisher. However, remembering the bulldog nature that is Shawn Michaels, on top of the fact that the Undertaker believed he already eliminated Shawn Michaels once already this evening, the Undertaker isn’t finished. He wants another. He lifts HBK’s lifeless body up once more, and scoops him up for a second tombstone. However from the corner of your screen, you see none other then Edge now perched on the top rope. Edge flies off, dropkicking Michaels, who is being held up-side-down by the Undertaker, square in the back. The momentum from the dropkick actually sends the Undertaker stumbling backwards, himself. Edge watches with excitement as the Undertaker is unable to regain his balance and falls backwards into the ropes, and tumbling over the top rope with Michaels in his grasp. THE UNDERTAKER & SHAWN MICHAELS ELIMINATED BY EDGE! Edge looks up with that cocky smirk realizing he is one of only two men left. He is this close to accomplishing his dream, lasting all thirty men and winning the Royal Rumble! Edge turns back around however too late, and Orton goes for his dreaded RKO! Edge is able to shove Orton off however at the last moment and sends his partner into the ropes. Orton bounces off the ropes, and runs square into a SPEAR! SPEAR! SPEAR! Edge has leveled Orton! HE has the rumble won! Edge knows it too! He throws his hands up in victory! He lifts himself off the canvas. Edge looks down at Orton, realizing he is moments away from victory. However at this split second, Edge is grabbed from behind, rushed forward, and dumped over the top rope! The bell sounds as Edge crashes to the floor. He looks up in the ring to see who the man who cost him the Royal Rumble was. EDGE ELIMINATED BY………… CHRISTIAN CAGE!!!!! Cage looks down at Edge who is completely shocked. Not a word is spoken from Cage, verbally at least. His physical actions however, have spoken volumes, and as a result of his interference, it will be Randy Orton will be headlining Wrestlemania 23!!!!!

    Randy Orton has WON the Royal Rumble!

    © 2007, World Wrestling Entertainment Inc.™

  16. JimRoss: Welcome back folks! What an incredible two hours we have already had!

    JoeyStyles: You hit the nail right on the head J-R. Here on Smackdown, we already have a new United States Champion, in CM Punk, and the announcement of an entire new division.

    Tazz: The E-Division.. I can’t wait to see that on Tuesday.

    JimRoss: And of course here on Raw, we have already had an incredible start as well. Randy Orton had Edge beat, but then decided twice on whether he wanted to give winning the Royal Rumble a ‘go’ or not, starting at the first spot.

    JerryLawler: And J-R, the worst news of the night happened when Carlito retained his title over Johnny Nitro, meaning tomorrow night on Raw, Melina must shave that pretty little head of hers. J-R, Melina is gonna be BALD!

    JimRoss: Maybe she can wear my cowboy hat? I’ll loan it to her, you know?

    JoeyStyles: Melina in a cowboy hat? That would be a reason to tune in to Raw, right there.

    Tazz: Melina is reason enough to watch Raw, bald or not, but fellas, what about the match up we are about to witness? The stakes for this one could not be any higher. The winner will get to be the last entrant into the royal rumble. The loser will not only have to enter at number three, but be at a major disadvantage, because he will have already been in a hard fought battle.

    JimRoss: Very good point Tazz. I do say this match is a ‘Must Win’ if there ever was such a thing in professional wrestling.

    RRHBKTaker.jpg

    ANNNOUNCER: Our next match is set for one fall, in which the winner of the match will be awarded the last entrant into the Royal Rumble!!!!! Introducing first, from San Antonio, Texas… He is the ‘Heartbreak Kid’, SHAWN MICHAELS!!!!

    -The sounds of females moans echo throughout the building as the hometown ‘Icon’ is about to make his entrance into the building.-

    You Think I’m Cute…I Know I’m Sexy

    I’m a SEXY BOY

    I Ain’t No Toy

    -Finally HBK enters the building and receives without question the largest reaction of the night. HBK dances around on stage for a bit, before dropping down to his knees and says one last prayer. As he does this, the pyros explode behind him. After Shawn is finished he stands up and makes his way down to the ring, rolling under the bottom rope and doing his classic stretch pose in front of some more fireworks as his hometown is loving every moment of this entrance.-

    ANNOUNCER: And his opponent… coming to us from Death Valley, he is the UNDERTAKER!!!!

    The lights turn off as the bells begin to toll. The crowd gives a huge reaction, despite the fact that this is the opposition to the hometown hero. The purple haze illuminates both the ring, and the entrance ramp and soon we see the druid servants make their way out along the entrance ramp with the flaming torches and long trenchcoats. Finally the Undertaker appears being wheeled into the arena on his chariot. Shawn Michaels looks on from the ring, and while the look isn’t one of fear, it is one of concern since he knows for how hard of a battle he is about to encounter. The chariot pauses at the bottom of the entrance ramp, and the Undertaker raises his hands, which brings a BOOM from the pyros so loud it would send a chill down the spine of any man, no matter how brave. The Undertaker makes his way up the steel steps and enters the ring, all the while never taking his eyes off Michaels, nor has Michaels taken his eyes off of the Undertaker. After removing the robe, the Undertaker steps up to the middle of the ring and the two future ‘Hall of Famers’ stand toe to toe with the lightbulbs flashing all around the arena. The height advantage is obvious, but in an industry where size is often over valued, no one doubts that these men are as evenly matched as you can come by in the industry. The staredown seems to last forever as neither man wants to give in and let the other man know that he won the battle of the staredown. Finally Shawn Michaels breaks the eye to eye session when he gives Undertaker a stiff slap across the face of the dead man, future proving that there is still a lot of ‘spunk’ left in the body of the ‘Heartbreak Kid’. The Undertaker nods his head, giving Michaels a certain amount of respect, before exploding with a right hand to the jaw of Michaels! HBK flies backwards, landing in the corner. The Undertaker moves in for the attack, landing rapidly repeating right hands to the face of Michaels, who can do nothing but cover up in the corner. The Undertaker finally takes a break from playing punching bag on Michaels, when he grabs Michaels by the arm and walks up the ropes. “Old School”! Michaels crash to the canvas, with the Undertaker in total control of this match in the early going. Michaels is slow to get up to his feet, and once he is on his feet, the Undertaker explodes with a boot to the face of Michaels, that sends HBK down to the canvas. The Undertaker goes for a quick cover, 1-2-KICKOUT! Taker questions the count, but lets it go, and goes back on the attack of Michaels. He pulls Michaels up to his feet, before unleashing an uppercut that sends Michaels back into the corner. Taker then proceeds to unload with rights and lefts to the abs of Michaels, softening up the mid section of the ‘Heartbreak Kid’. Michaels stumbles out from the corner, but Taker grabs Michaels by the throat and hurls him back into the corner. Taker then takes a few steps back himself, before charging with a body splash, that pancakes Michaels into the corner. Michaels stumbles out from the corner, and that is when Taker is able to unload with a boot to the face! Michaels is out! The Undertaker covers, 1-2-KICKOUT! Taker shakes his head again, this time out of frustration. He grabs Michaels by the hair and pulls him up to his feet, however Michaels fights off, and falls back into the corner after breaking free from the hold. Michaels climbs up onto the middle rope, with Taker looking onward. Out of nothing more then desperation, Michaels leaps off the middle ropes with a weak axe handle smash that the Undertaker is able to counter easily by grabbing the throat of Michaels. Chokeslam! This one may be over. 1-2-KICKOUT! The Undertaker looks over in disbelief at the ref, who has to inform him it is only a two count. Taker just shakes his head, then signals for the match to end. Taker grabs Michaels, and pulls him up, however Michaels begins to fight. The Undertaker has no choice but to slam Michaels back down to the canvas with a second ‘chokeslam’, but obviously wanting to attempt the ‘Tombstone’ and was unable. Tazz makes a wise crack about how Michaels’ bulldoggish persistence is getting under the skin of the Undertaker. Jim Ross says that there has never been more of a competitor in the WWE’s history, then Shawn Michaels. The Undertaker pulls the Heartbreak Kid up to his feet, then connect with a second straight ‘Chokeslam’! The Undertaker climbs back up and signals for the end once again, but this time with a bit of anger. He grabs Michaels and pulls him up to his feet, then lifts him up: Tombstone! Tombstone! Tombstone! 1-2-3! The Undertaker has finally done enough to put away Shawn Michaels. Taker climbs up to his feet, and raises his hand victory. The crowd gives him a nice pop, but as he does this, Taker looks down at Michaels. He nods his head, then lifts up Michaels, and rests him up against the turnbuckle, a show of respect. Taker then exits the ring, knowing that he will be the last entrant into the rumble.

    The Undertaker defeats Shawn Michaels

    [- It's That Time of Year Again... FOLEY IS HERE -]

    SKREEEEEEEECH…..

    CRAAAAAAASH!!!!

    -The fans erupt as Mick Foley makes his way out onto the stage and down to the ring. While making his way down to the ring, Foley doesn’t acknowledge the crowd, or seem to be his joyful self. He rolls into the ring and goes straight to speak without any cheap pops or anything.-

    Mick Foley: Lets get right down to it, shall we? It seems that we are getting closer to Wrestlemania, which means it is time for my yearly ass kicking at the hands of some ‘Flavor of the Month’. Now I don’t know who the lucky young man is this year, who gets to beat my ass, but bring them out here and lets get this over with.

    JerryLawler: Jim, do you believe what we are hearing?

    JimRoss: King, I’m speechless. It seems as though Mick Foley has snapped.

    JerryLawler: I guess all of those Wrestlemania losses has finally caught up with him.

    JimRoss: Come on Mick. Don’t do this. Don’t make a mockery out of yourself. Have some self respect.

    -The fans begin to stir, not really knowing what to make of this quite yet. Mick Foley begins to grow tired of waiting.-

    Mick Foley: Come on dammit! Bring out whoever you want me to lose to at Wrestlemania. I don’t give a damn….

    Make Me A...

    SUPERSTAR

    -Out from the back comes the Cruiserweight Champion, Gregory Helms and his Princess of Punk, Ashley Massaro. The two make their way down to the ring as Foley watches his potential Wrestlemania foe with an indifferency that most have never seen before.-

    Greg Helms: Well if it isn’t Mick Foley.

    Mick Foley: Yes, I’m Mick Foley, and you are the Hurricane. Now that we know…

    Greg Helms: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Where the hell have you been over the past year and half Mick? I’m Gregory Helms… the longest reigning champion in the history of the WWE! I am…

    Mick Foley: Listen, Greg. I don’t care what gimmick you are pushing at this moment. All I want to do is get this ass kicking over with, so I can go back home for the rest of the year.

    Greg Helms: Gimmick? Mick, when you are as talented as me, you don’t need a gimmick. I’m not like you Mick. I don’t need to jump off a roof, or rip off my ear to get noticed by these fans. I have what you don’t… TALENT! I have found that I don’t need to act like someone I’m not to make it in this bussiness. The fact is Mick, I have not only made a name for myself, but proven to be a damn good wrestler without being something I’m not. I don’t need a gimmick to get over. I guess you can call me the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’.

    Mick Foley: Ok, so you are the “No Gimmick Superstar”… now lets get this over with so I can go back to my life. Here you go, just pin me right here.

    -Mick Foley drops the mic and lays down. He motions for Helms to come over and pin him. Both Greg and Ashley don’t know what to make of it, but finally Helms moves over and places a boot on the chest of Foley, who slams the mat three times. Helms raises his hand in celebration, but as soon as he does you hear the sounds of shattering glass-

    *GLASS SHATTERING*

    CCCCCCCRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSHHHHH

    -The roof off the building blows off, as Steve Austin explodes onto the stage and stomps his way down to the ring. Helms looks on in shock and horror, as the Texas Rattlesnake storms down to the ring. Austin rolls into the ring and grabs Mick by the hair, pulling him up his feet, before turning his attention towards Greg Helms.-

    Steve Austin: So you are the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’? -WHAT- He says he is the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’. -WHAT- He says he don’t need a gimmick. -WHAT- He thinks he can just act like himself, and people will think he is anything but a big ass dork. -WHAT- A clown. -WHAT- A fool. -WHAT- This is coming from a man who use to put on little green tights and pretend to be a superhero! -WHAT- Tell me, ‘No Gimmick Superstar’, does Steve Austin have a gimmick?

    Greg Helms: Of course, you are a beer swilling redneck.

    Steve Austin: So I’m a beer swilling redneck? -WHAT- So when I’m at home drinking a beer… am I playing a gimmick then? -WHAT- Am I pretending to enjoy that beer? -WHAT- You may be on to something jack. Let me see. Throw me a beer!

    -Austin looks over at the time keeper, who throws him a beer. Austin opens it up and pours it down his throat.-

    Steve Austin: Nope, no pretending there, but we better have another one just to make sure.

    -Austin calls for a second beer, then a third. He pours both down in about four seconds, then redirects his attention towards Greg Helms.-

    Steve Austin: So tell me something, Mr. “No Gimmick”, what the hell did you ever accomplish in your little pathetic existence you call a career, that warrants coming down to the ring… -WHAT-…. Talking down my friend Mick Foley…. -WHAT- Putting your little greasy boot on his chest....-WHAT- ...and pretending to score a victory over him… -WHAT-…What exactly have you ever done? -WHAT- Tell me? -WHAT- I said tell me, you RAT BASTARD!

    Greg Helms: Where have you old timers been? I’m the longest reigning champion in WWE History?

    Steve Austin: You held the World Title? You took the belt from Batista? -WHAT- No? So you took John Cena’s Belt?-WHAT- Chris Benoit’s? -WHAT- CM Punk's? -WHAT- Carlito’s? -WHAT- Hell son, tell me you didn’t go off and take that belt off of Mickie James? -WHAT- Cause you know if I was a bit younger Mick, I may have to make her an future Ex-Wife of Ole' Stone Cold… -WHAT- You get the point! -WHAT- You ain’t don’t shit in your life son. You’re a no body! -WHAT- A Nothing! -WHAT- A Zero! -WHAT- The only thing you have accomplish in your life, was popping out of your mother’s womb, and your mother had to push you to do that, you yellow bellied bastard! -WHAT- So let me tell you what. Here is what you are gonna do. What do you say, you and my friend Mick Foley here have a real match at Wrestlemania? What do you say about that?

    Greg Helms:

    -BOOM! Steve Austin doesn’t wait for an answer. He delivers a STUNNER right to the ‘No Gimmick Superstar’ Greg Helms. Austin pops up.-

    Steve Austin: Sorry Mick, I guess he’ll have to give you an answer later.

    -Austin shrugs, then calls for two more beers. He hands one to Mick Foley, then opens up the other one and toasts Mick Foley, who seems to be a bit happier then when he entered the ring. The two celebrate over a cold one.-

    RRWWETitle.jpg

    ANNOUCER: Our next match is set for one fall, with no disqualifications, and is for the WWE Heavyweight Championship! In the ring at this time…

    -Estrada jerks the mic from the announcer.-

    Armando Alejandro Estrada: SHUT UP…you stupid BUM! Ladies, and Gentlemen of the W-W-E… my ‘Samoan Bulldozer’ is UNDEFEATED in competition here in the WWE. He has never been pinned! He has never been made to submit! Nobody, no matter how big or how tall, ‘dey all left LOSERS after entering the ring with my ‘Samoan Bulldozer’. Sooooo tonight, prepare for the ‘Undefeated… Samoan Bulldozer’ to become the new W-W-E Champion! I am SOOOO confident of that, that if Umaga loses he will leave Raw! You see…dat’s how confident I am, in my Umaga. Because to…night, not only are we gonna take his belt, but my Umaga is GONNA KILL JOHN CENA! KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM!!!!!!

    ‘WORD LIFE’

    ANNOUNCER: And making his way to the ring at this time, he is the current WWE Champion, the Doctor of Thuganomics…. JOHN CENA!!!!

    Cena’s music hits the airwaves, and out marches the WWE Champion to basically a 70/30 reaction from the crowd. Cena raises the spinner belt into the air, as he motions that the champ is ‘HeRRE’, towards Estrada and Umaga. Cena rolls into the ring and both the Champion and the challenger begin exchanging punches in the middle of the ring. Both powerhouses whale away on one another, neither man really giving up much, however eventually it is the WWE Champion, John Cena who over powers Umaga with the right hands, and sends Umaga crashing to the canvas. Umaga pulls himself back up to his feet, but Cena uses this time to bounce off the ropes, and execute a ‘Lou Thez Press’ on top of Umaga, and continue to whale away at the Samoan Bulldozer. Estrada has seen enough and reaches into the ring, grabbing the Champion. Cena doesn’t like this at all, and rolls out of the ring. He begins to chase Estrada around the ring, until it finally hits him that Estrada set a trap for him. Its too late though, and as Cena turns around Umaga pancakes him into the steel ring post! Cena falls to the floor, as Estrada begins to tell Umaga to HURT HIM! Umaga picks up Cena and hurls him across the ring area, and through the steel steps! Cena actually lands on top of the bottom of the steps, totally motionless. Umaga begins to dig underneath the ring and pulls out a table. The Samoan Bulldozer slides the table into the ring, then rolls the champion into the ring as well, before finally joining both. Umaga sets up the table, resting against the turnbuckle at an angle. Umaga then gives a few stiff slaps to the face of Cena to revive himself. As this is going on, Raw President Triple H makes his way out onto the entrance ramp to view the end of the Cena reign as WWE Champion. He applauds Umaga’s efforts and points back towards the ring to show Umaga that Cena is getting up. Cena pulls himself up to his feet, however unfortunately for him, has positioned himself right in front of the table that Umaga set up against the turnbuckle. Umaga charges right at the WWE Champion, however John Cena spots him! Cena side steps Umaga, who charges right through the table, shattering it in half! Triple H is livid on the top of the ramp as Cena throws up the ‘Word Life’ sign, and signals for the end. He waits for Umaga to get up from the debris as the fans begin to go crazy. However, what Cena doesn’t realize is that they aren’t making noise for him, but for the seven-foot tall monster, Big Show, who has entered the ring behind him. Big Show spins Cena around and drops him with a CHOKESLAM! Big Show signals its over and exits the ring, by stepping over the top rope. Triple H loves what he sees, and applauds the Big Show, as the seven footer joins his boss at the top of the entrance ramp. Umaga finally makes it up to his feet, and spots the downed John Cena. Estrada begins to scream ‘KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM!’. Umaga mistakes these orders, and thinks Estrada wants him to punish Cena some more. Umaga steps out onto the apron and begins to climb up to the top of the ropes. Estrada is pleading with Umaga not to make this mistake, but the thickheaded Samoan doesn’t hear his manager and leaps off with a diving headbutt, which catches nothing but canvas after Cena moves! HHH is furious and tells Big Show to get back in there. Cena begins to pick himself up off the canvas, and braces for another battle with the seven-foot monster, however before Big Show can enter the ring, he is drilled from behind with a steel chair… FROM RIC FLAIR! The sixteen time World Champ drills the monster from behind, and then begins to lay into the monster with stomps for good measure. Cena has a grin grow all over his face, as he turns back towards the action to spot Umaga making it up to his feet. Cena lifts the ‘Samoan Bulldozer’ up onto his shoulders, then drops him with the FU! The crowd counts along with the ref, 1-2-3! Cena retains his title, much to the disbelief of Triple H, who is beside himself up on the entrance ramp. Estrada looks stunned as now, not only has Umaga lost his undefeated streak, but because of Estrada’s own over confidence, Umaga must leave Raw! Cena is handed the spinner belt, and he raises it high in the air, right at the Raw President, Triple H.

    John Cena defeats Umaga to RETAIN the WWE Championship!

    [- Do You Remember Me? -]

    I once claimed to be the 'King of the World'...

    Some have said that is a bit of an overstatement...

    I may not be the Kking of your World....

    But to the Millions of Jericholics...

    I am the King of OUR WORLD...

    jerichokomw.jpg

    CHRIS JERICHO IS COMING!

    RRWorldTitle.jpg

    ANNOUNCER: Our next match is set for one fall, with triple threat rules, and is for the WWE WORLD CHAMPIONSIHP! In the ring at this time… FIT FINLAY!!!!

    -Finlay takes his introduction as always, not even giving it the acknowledgement of moving a single muscle. However the arena’s reaction soon changes from indifference to over whelming excitement as they hear…-

    'Unleash the Beast'

    -The fans give an initial loud pop as the World Champion steps out onto the entrance ramp. He walks over to one side of the entrance ramp and motions for the raises to rise up to their feet. They obey. He marches over to the other side of the entrance ramp and motions for them to rise up to their feet. They too obey. Batista then takes his spot in the middle of the entrance ramp, and motions for the entire arena to rise to their feet. They obey. Batista then slowly begins to make his way down to the ring. Once in the ring, the World Champion rips off his World Title belt, and shows it off to the entire world. -

    ANNOUNCER: And Making his way to the ring at this time, he is the current WWE, World Champion… ‘The Animal’ DAVE BATISTA!!!!

    -Dave Batista still holds his World Championship belt high in the air as the fans react to this with a majority of cheers, with a few jeers thrown in. However what little boos there are in the arena, is quickly turned into cheers as we hear…-

    ANNOUNCER: And making his way to the ring at this time, he reigns from Houston, TEXAS.... BOOKER T!!!!!

    CAN YOU DIG IT.....SUCKA???

    The crowd explodes as Booker T steps out onto the entrance ramp. No Sharmell. No Crown. No Cape. Just Booker T, with the dreads flowing. BANG! The pyros explode behind him, as he does his classic pose in front of them. Booker then turns his attention towards the ring as he makes his way down the entrance ramp. The AT&T Center is loving the return of the “Booker Man”, and gives him a louder cheer as he leaps onto the apron, and stepping between the top and middle rope, entering the ring. Once in the ring, he gives a death stare to the Fit Finlay, then slowly turns his attention towards the World Champion. The bell finally sounds to begin the match. As soon as the bell sounds Finlay charges Batista, who just explodes running right over Finlay. The Irishman climbs up to his feet, but is met with a straight right hand from Dave Batista. A second one! A third one! Batista checks himself, before delivering a fourth shot right to Fit Finlay! The Irishman crashes down to the canvas, but rises up quickly. The expression on his face is priceless. He has a grin from ear to ear, almost as if he enjoyed the beating. Batista looks over at Booker, and the two exchanges a look of disbelief at what they are seeing. Both then join forces and begin to pumbled the Irishman back into the corner. Booker backs off and allows the World Champion to tie up Finlay. Batista ties up Finlay, but Finlay wins this leveling an uppercut to Dave Batista, before lying in with a trio of right hand shots of his own. Dave Batista isn’t as welcoming to the right hands as Fit Finlay, and just tries to shake off the punches. They tie up again, but Finlay goes behind Batista, then delivers a straight palm shot right to the temple of Dave Batista, before executing a chop block right to the right knee. Batista crashes to the canvas, as Finlay appears to be in total control of this match at this point. With Batista on the canvas, Booker decides to interject himself into the match at this point. Booker explodes from behind with a club to the back of the head of Finlay, sending him crashing into the turnbuckle. Booker then spins Finlay around before laying into him with an open hand… or in Booker’s case open glove chop. Finlay grabs his chest in pain, but Booker stays on the assault, laying in with a Flair like chop, which receives a ‘Woooo’ from the fans. Booker takes a step back, then charges, leveling a clothesline to Finlay that sends him tumbling out of the ring. Booker now raises his hands like only Booker does, believing he has everything right where he wants it. However he turns around to see the World Champion. Batista explodes with a clothesline of his own that sends both himself and booker crashing to the canvas. Batista pops up after this confrontation and looks to have things under control. However that is until Finlay appears on the apron with that damn sheliegh and drills Batista right in the forehead! Batista crashes to the canvas, as Finlay tosses his favorite weapon of choice down on the Smackdown announcing table. He then steps into the ring and cover the World Champion. The crowd chants with the ref…. ONE…..TWO!!!! However Batista is able to kick out, even with Finlay using the ropes for leverage. Finlay climbs up on his knees and questions the ref’s ability to count to three, believing he had the championship won. Out of nowhere, Booker T explodes with a dropkick, sending Finlay tumbling through the ropes and onto the floor below! Booker climbs up to his feet and gives Batista a few stiff kicks right to the gut for good measure. The former six-time World Champion then pulls Batista up to his feet, before raising a knee to the gut of the current World Champion. Booker falls back into the ropes, then leaps into the air, connecting with his AXE KICK! The kick catches Batista in the back of the head, and sends him crashing to the canvas. Booker believes he is moments away from winning this match, and steps out onto the apron, before climbing up to the top rope. However out of nowhere, Batista comes flying in, and explodes up to the middle rope, catching Booker! SUPERPLEX! Batista superplexes Booker off the top rope! The AT&T Center is loving it as both men are motionless in the middle of the ring. Joey Styles and Tazz are going crazy at their announce spot, saying how these are the two biggest names in all of Smackdown, and they are hooking up for the final time, so both men are leaving it all on the line. Both men slowly begin to move, and pull themselves up to their feet. They both reach their feet at about the same time, so neither man really has an advantage. Booker leans in first with a stiff right hand that catches the jaw of the World Champion, however Batista responds with a shot of his own. Booker fires back, but only to receive a return visit from Batista. Batista levels off another quick shot, before sending Booker into the ropes. SPINEBUSTER! The ring shakes as Batista levels Booker with a spinebuster! He crawls over and makes the cover on Booker, however before the ref can begin to count, Finlay breaks up the pinfall. Finlay grabs Batista by the boots and pulls him under the bottom rope, and onto the floor below. Finlay takes the Champion while he is confused, and hurls him shoulder first into the steel steps! Joey Styles and Tazz go off, about the beating that Finlay has put the World Champion through. Finlay looks over at them, and gives a sick grin, then climbs up on the table, and grabs the sheliegh he left there earlier in the match. He grabs the weapon and watches as Batista slowly pulls himself up from the now dismembered steel steps. Batista has his back to Finlay at this point, as he stumbles around, trying to regain his ‘wits’. Batista turns slowly towards the announce table, and as he does Finlay leaps off swinging that sheliegh, but Batista catches him, and drives him THROUGH the Smackdown announce table with a spinebuster! The AT&T Center goes berserk as both the World Champion, and everyone’s favorite Irishman lay motionless in the debris with Booker T motionless inside the ring. Finally Batista begins to stir, with Tazz and Joey Styles scrambling to do any sort of announcing with their work position totally destroyed. Batista slowly emerges from the debris of what once was the Smackdown announce table. He is a total mess at this point. His face, which has been bleeding for most of the match, is now nothing more then a crimson mask. However, Batista stands tall over the debris, looking like an invincible movie star hero that Arnold Schwartzenager would play. He looks down at Finlay who is totally motionless, and covered in blood too at this point. Batista slowly turns his head towards the ring where Booker is starting to move around once again at this point. Batista rolls into the ring and stands over Booker who is still mustering every last ounce of strength to at least finish this match like a man, face to face. Booker pulls himself to his feet, but is totally disoriented once he reaches his feet. He stumbles around, and falls right into the hands of Batista who scoops him up and delivers a SPINEBUSTER! The ring shakes as Batista drives Booker into the canvas. Batista pauses for a moment, and begins to shake his head. The blood loss has to be getting to him now, and he can be going on nothing but pure adrenaline at this point. Batista pushes himself up to his feet, which draws a pop from the crowd. In fact the arena goes berserk at this point, as Batista grabs the ropes and begins to go crazy on them, ala Ultimate Warrior. Batista stumbles over to Booker, the fatigue of this match obvious with every step. He grabs Booker by the dreads and pulls him up, throwing his head between his legs. Batista bends over, on top of Booker, as he goes to lift up the former six-time World Champion for his powerbomb finisher, however apparently this is where Batista’s tank hits ‘empty’, and Batista collapses over to the canvas. Booker T, by only the grace of luck, happens to fall on top of Batista. Despite the fact that both men are out cold, Booker is laying on top of Batista, which forces the ref to make the count, as the crowd counts a long… ‘ONE’…..’TWO’….’THREE’!!!!!! The ref sounds the bell and raises the lifeless hand of Booker T, however as soon as he releases the grasp, the hand of the new World Champion falls right back down to the canvas. Sharmell emerges from the back and rolls into the ring, celebrating with her man. Booker has rolled over onto his side, off of Batista at this point, but still totally unaware of what has happened. It begins to sink in as he sees Sharmell and the ref handing him the World Championship. The fans of the AT&T Center are going crazy, after witnessing one of the greatest matches in Smackdown history.

    Booker T defeats ©Dave Batista and Fit Finaly to WIN the World Championship!

  17. RROrtonEdge.jpg

    ANNOUNCER: Our Next Match is set for one fall, in which the winner of this match up will be awarded the first entrant into the Royal Rumble....

    The Time Has Come to Change My Way…

    On This Day, I See Clearly….

    Everything Has Come to Life!!!

    ANNOUNCER: Introducing first, from Toronto, Canada! He is the ‘Rated R Superstar’, EDGE!

    -The pyros explode on the stage, and through the smoke emerges Edge and his sexpot Lita. The two embrace as they exit the smoke, showing off their lust for one another. After a few moments of this, they make their way down to the ring.-

    JimRoss: King, this is a battle of tag team partners that want the same thing.

    JerryLawler: You’re right JR. Both of these men want not only to WIN the Royal Rumble, but prove they are the best wrestlers without question.

    JimRoss: Well King, if they can win this match, then last through thirty other men in the Royal Rumble, they will prove their point.

    JerryLawler: True, but I think this is dumb, JR. When I was competing, I always wanted the thirtieth spot, not the first

    ANNOUNCER: And Making his way to the ring at this time, reigning from St. Louis, Missouri. He is the ‘Legend Killer’, RANDY ORTON!

    Hey!………………………………Hey!

    Hey! There’s Nothing You Can Say

    Nothings Gonna Change What You’ve Done To Me

    Now My Time to Shine… I’m Gonna Take What’s Mine

    Take What’s Mine!

    The golden pyros begin to fall from the ceiling as the ‘Legend Killer’ Randy Orton emerges from the back, and takes his spot underneath the waterfall of golden sparkles. Orton gives his classic pose for a few moments before making his way to the ring. His tag team partner, and opponent for this match, Edge, watches his every step as he makes his way down to the ring. Orton rolls under the bottom rope, and greets his tag partner in the middle of the ring with a good old fashion stare down. The bell sounds, but neither man moves a muscle as they stand face to face. Edge is the first one to break the silence when he offers a handshake for good luck, and Orton reluctantly accepts. Nothing occurs from this exchange and both men break cleanly. They tie up and the match is under way. The two partners lock up in a grapple, and it is Randy Orton who comes out of this first exchange with the advantage, when he locks Edge in a side headlock. Orton tightens the grip on Edge’s skull, as the ‘Rated R Superstar’ reaches for the ropes. Edge is finally able to get out of the hold after a few punches to the ribs of Orton, and then shoving him into the ropes. The ‘Legend Killer’ bounces off the ropes, and both men execute a shoulder block, with neither man doing much of anything. Edge falls back into the ropes and the two men exchange shoulder blocks once more, but yet again neither man gains much of anything from the exchange. This time Randy Orton is the one who falls back into the ropes, but as he comes off the ropes, Edge drops the canvas, and executes a drop toe hold, which sends Randy Orton crashing to the canvas, face first. Orton grabs his face, to make sure everything is where it should be. Edge ceases this opportunity and mounts his tag team partner, before laying into him with punches to the over self valued face of Randy Orton. The Legend Killer finally shoves Edge off, and rolls over and climbs up to his feet. He grabs his jaw, and gives Edge a death stare. Edge just gives Orton a shrug, and chuckles for a moment. The two men lock up, but Orton breaks the attempt and delivers a stiff slap right across the face of Edge. He grabs his jaw for a moment, almost stunned. Edge finally lets a chuckle out, then goes back to attempting to grapple Orton, who ducks behind Edge and locks him in a rear-waist lock. Orton flings Edge over his shoulder, and crashes Edge down to the canvas, before locking Edge in a side headlock on the canvas. Edge squirms for relief, but the more he fights, the tighter Orton locks in the hold. Randy now has the hold at almost a 45 degree angle, as Edge is trying franticly to find an escape. He finally finds it… actually his girlfriend is the one who finds it, in the form of grabbing the boot of her man, and placing it on the bottom rope. The ref sees this and calls for a break. Orton suspects something is fishy, but complains no more then normal. Randy Orton grabs Edge by the hair of the head and pulls him up to his feet. Once on his feet, Orton drives his knee below the belt of Edge, however doing so to where the ref cannot see him. This brings Lita up on the apron, screaming at the ref that Orton is cheating. Randy just cracks a smirk, knowing the ref cannot do a thing about it. Edge however takes this moment to shake off the cobwebs and catch Orton distracted. He grabs Orton by the head and drops down to the canvas, executing a jawbreaker! Orton is dazed as Edge rolls up to his feet. He motions with his hands setting up for the SPEAR! However Orton is able to recover at the last second, and dodges his tag team partner, allowing Edge to run right past Orton and into Lita who is standing on the apron. After colliding with Edge, Lita flies off the apron and crashes hard into the steel guardrail. Edge staggers after the collision and this give Orton time to execute his RKO! RKO! RKO! The crowd jeers like crazy as Edge is motionless, and Lita is hurt on the outside! Randy has this match all but won as he appears to be shaking out the cobwebs after hitting his finisher on Edge, however after a few moments it apparent that he is thinking about something. Orton drops to the canvas in front of Edge, and places Edge’s hand across the chest of Orton. The ref looks strangely, but rolls into position and counts Orton’s shoulders down on the canvas. The bell sounds, as Orton rolls out of the ring. The ref raises the lifeless hand of Edge in victory, however as soon as the ref lets go, Edge’s hand crashes to the canvas. ,Randy Orton back tracks up the entrance ramp with that cocky smirk, as he taps the side of his head, motioning that he just outsmarted Edge. Obviously, Randy Orton had a change of heart, and has no problem entering the rumble later then the first entrant.

    'The Rated R Superstar' Edge def 'The Legend Killer' Randy Orton

    Edge will enter the Royal Rumble First!

    [- 'Say Hello to the Konfederacy' -]

    -The scene fades into a older wooden cabin somewhere in the middle of the woods. Inside the cabin are two large men, both decked out in camouflage hunting apparel. One is chewing on what appears to be a piece of grass; the other is drinking from a ‘Miller Lite’ can. The man drinking beer, looks square into the camera, and after taking one last drink from his can, begins to speak as the other man appears busy chewing on the piece of grass.-

    AG WRIGHT: Hello… my name is Andrew Glenn Wright. This is my brother, Kodi Wright. He ain’t go no middle name. Together we form the “controversial” new group known as the ‘Konfederacy”.

    KODI WRIGHT: What’s so CON-JER-VERT-SEAL-AL, ‘bout you and me, bubba?

    AG WRIGHT: Oh you know, since we represent good ole’ Dixie, the PC police has to blow on their god damn whistle. You see, that’s the problem now a’days. Me and Kodi, we grew up watching wrestling, when wrestling was worth watching. My old man brought us up watching guys like Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, Bret Hart… and legends like that. But you see, the whole game started to change when guys like Ron Simmons got involved; Ron Simmons, Ahmed Johnson, The Rock. Hell now adays you have guys like Shelton Benjamin, Bobby Lashley, and even this new fella, DeShaun Christian. It seems as if Vince McMahon has just crawled in the sack with the ‘Color Purple’. So you see… that’s where me and Kodi come in.

    KODI WRIGHT: WRIGHT POWER!

    AG WRIGHT: We are gonna come to the WWE and help bring back the ‘OLD SCHOOL’. We are going to return wrestling to the way it should be. We are going to start purifying the WWE, one stain at a time….

    KODI WRIGHT: WRIGHT POWER!

    AG WRIGHT: WWE… You’ve Been Warned!

    KODI WRIGHT: WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER! WRIGHT POWER!

    -End of Feed-

    RRICTitle.jpg

    ANNOUNCER: Our next match is set for one fall and is a "Hair vs Title Match"!!! Under the rules of this match, if Johnny Nitro scores the pinfall, he will become new Intercontinental Champion! However, if Carlito wins, Melinda must shave her head tommorrow night on Monday Night Raw!

    I Spit in the Face...

    Of People Who Don't Want to be Cool!

    ANNOUNCER: Introducing first, the champion. He reigns from the Caribbean, and is the current Intercontinental Champion! He is the 'King of Cool', Carlito!

    -Carlito makes his way out onto the stage with his trademark apple, the Intercontinental Championship, and a barber's head shaver, just to toy with Melinda. He makes his way down to the ring and begins to play with the shaver as he waits for Nitro to come down to the ring.-

    JerryLawler: JR, do you really think Carlito will force Melinda to shave her head, if Nitro loses?

    JimRoss: I would bet two months of Sooner Illustrated that he would.

    JerryLawler: Dang, I was affraid it was just me.

    ANNOUNCER: And making their way to the ring at this time, the challenger! He reigns from Hollywood, CA, being accompanied to the ring by Melinda, JOHNNY NITRO!!!

    -Lightbulbs begin to flash all over the entrance ramp...-

    **FLASH**--**FLASH**--**FLASH**

    The entrance ramp continues erupt with flashing lights, emulating the flashes from paparazzi cameras. After a few moments, the flashes subside, and out walks Johnny Nitro and Melinda. The red carpet rolls out in front of them, as they pause at the top of the ramp, and give their classic pose for the WWE Nation in the arena tonight. The hot young couple walk down to the ring, where Melinda enters the ring in her own special way, then gives way for Nitro to slide into the ring underneath her. Carlito looks on, unimpressed. He waves the shaver around to get the attention of Melinda. This does grab the attention of Johnny Nitro who knocks it out of the hand of Carlito. The Intercontinental Champ looks on in shock for a moment, then drills Nitro with a right hand! Nitro is stunned as Carlito lays into his opponent with shot after shot, finally knocking Nitro to the ground. Carlito helps Nitro and removes his fur jacket, which Nitro was unable to remove before the match began. Carlito lays into Nitro some more with right hands, before Nitro is finally able to execute a low blow to Carlito. Nitro grabs the slumped champion, and throws him head first into the turnbuckle! Melinda cheers on, as Nitro grabs Carlito by the head and chokes him on the middle rope. Melinda is inches away from Carlito at this point, and screaming at him. Nitro lets go, pulling Carlito up by the hair of the head. Carlito breaks the holds, and gives Nitro a shot to the face, before running towards the ropes, leaping onto the middle rope, and executing a twisting missle dropkick that catches Nitro square in the jaw. The ref goes to check on Johnny Nitro, as Carlito feels as if he has this match won at this point. He walks over to the corner and grabs the shaver. He grabs it by the cored and tangles it in front of Melinda who is just on the outside, teasing her. This sends the Hollywood Diva straight to the edge, and she reaches into the ring, delivering a shot below the belt to Carlito! The ref doesn’t see a thing, as he is still tending to Johnny Nitro, with Carlito now down on all fours. Melinda reaches into the ring and grabs the shaver. She drills Carlito square in the head knocking him completely out! The crowd erupts into a chorus of boos as Melinda rushes to the other side of the ring and tries to motivate her man to get up. Nitro soon does rise to his feet, and after realizing what has happened, goes to end the match. He climbs to the top rope, doing so against the wishes of Melinda. Nitro pauses for a moment, then leaps off connecting with the ‘Money Shot’ on Carlito! 1-2-3! Johnny Nitro picks up the win! Melinda grabs the IC title, and rushes into the ring to celebrate with her man. However as the ref stands up, he notices that Carlito’s foot is resting on the bottom rope! He tells the bell keeper to ring the bell and restart the match! Johnny Nitro has no clue, as him and Melinda are celebrating wildly. The ref jerks the belt away from Nitro and tells him the problem. Nitro is stunned. He looks at the ref in disbelief, and that gives Carlito time to grab Nitro from behind and execute the ‘BackCracker’! Melinda can just look down in horror as the ref counts right in front of her 1-2-3! The crowd erupts into a loud roar of cheers as Carlito rolls out of the ring victorious! The crowd eats it up as the ‘King of Cool’ reaches under the bottom rope and takes his championship belt. He grabs the shaver, but then looks back at Melinda and rolls the shaver at her feet, saying ‘Dat’s for you!’. Johnny Nitro kicks the shaver out of the ring, as Melinda looks on in horror, realizing she has only 24 hours left with her hair!

    'King of Cool' Carlito© def JohnnyNitro

    Melinda must appear tomorrow on Raw and have her head shaved!

    JerryLawler: NOOOO!!!! Melinda is gonna be BALD, JR!

    JimRoss: Here you go, wait a minute while I shed a tear for the jezebel.

    JerryLawler: JR, this is serious! Melinda is gonna be bald!

    JimRoss: It couldn’t happen to a better individual!

  18. 15 Raw Superstars...

    15 Smackdown Superstars...

    30 Men....

    1 Dream, to Headline Wrestlemania.....

    And the Road to Wrestlemania 23 Begins!

    RoyalRumble.jpg

    Live from San Antonio, and the AT&T Center

    JimRoss: Welcome Everybody to the Royal Rumble! This without question, the most chaotic night in the entire year of the WWE, because King, tonight thirty men will compete in the Royal Rumble!

    JerryLawler: JR, you couldn’t be more right. 15 Raw Superstars will join 15 Smackdown Superstars, and they will battle it out for the right to headline Wrestlemania! J-R, the stakes couldn’t be higher!

    JimRoss: You are correct, my good friend! Well, folks tonight we are joined by our good friends from Smackdown…

    JerryLawler: Speak for yourself, JR!

    JoeyStyles: I will take that as my cue, and on behalf of Smackdown welcome everyone to the Royal Rumble.

    Tazz: Yeah, thanks for the welcoming J-R. As for King… well go get ran over by a bus, would ya?

    JoeyStyles: Lets play nice now Tazz! The last thing we need a fight breaking out at our announcing booth.

    Tazz: Alright. Alright. Alright.

    JoeyStyles: Folks, let me tell you this, the tension is so thick in this arena, you can cut it with a knife! As the gentlemen from Raw have already pointed out, thirty superstars will battle it out for the right to headline Wrestlemania, but that’s not all!

    Tazz: No, tonight we have a hellueva… can I use that word J-R?

    JimRoss; Go right on ahead.

    Tazz: Well we have a hellueva main event for you with Batista squaring off against two men, the six time World Champion, Booker T, and the toughest damn Irishmen I ever did see, Fit Finlay!

    JimRoss; Tazz, that match up I can’t wait to see, but then you can’t forget about the WWE Championship. New Raw President, Triple H has been hell bent on making John Cena’s life a living hell, and King, tonight John Cena faces his toughest challenge yet, in the Undefeated Samoan Bulldozer, Umaga.

    JerryLawler: J-R, I am predicting the WWE Championship will change here tonight!

    Tazz: Don’t ever count out, John Cena. He’s one tough son of a gun.

    JimRoss: That he is Tazz, and neither can you ever count out the World Champion, Dave Batista.

    JoeyStyles: No doubt about it, J-R, but Tazz, it wouldn’t be a far stretch to say that Dave Batista may be a little in over his head tonight when he takes on two men, in Booker T and Fit Finlay.

    Tazz: No doubt it, Batista doesn’t have the Champion’s advantage tonight for sure, but then again, that could work in his favor. After all, remember this is the Royal Rumble. No one is friends on this evening.

    JoeyStyles: No truer words could have been spoken, Tazz. Folks, it is now time to head to the ring, for our opening match!

    6-1-9

    -The pyros explode as Rey Mysterio explodes from underneath the entrance ramp. The crowd gives him a nice reaction upon seeing him, to which he acknowledges the reaction as he makes his way down to the ring for the title match.-

    RRCWTitle.jpg

    ANNOUNCER: This is the opening bout for the 'Royal Rumble!.... and it is for the Cruiserweight Championship! Making his way to the ring at this time, from San Deigo... REY MYSTERIO JR!

    Make Me A...

    SUPERSTAR

    ANNOUNCER: And making his way to the ring at this time, reigning from Raleigh, N.C, he is the reigning Cruiserweight Champion, being accompanied to the ring by the Princess of Punk, Ashley Massacro... GREGORY HELMS!!!!

    Out from the back emerges the Cruiserweight Champion, Gregory Helms and the Princess of Punk Ashley. The two stop at the top of the entrance ramp and look out at the crowd. Ashley then steps in front of her man, and bends down licking the Cruiserweight Championship that is around his waist. The fans eat this up, then watch as the two make their way down to the ring. Ashley stays outside, as Helms goes to enter the ring. However Rey Mysterio wants to start the match off early and executes a suicide dive to the outside as the bell rings, landing on top of the Cruiserweight Champion! Rey pounds on Helms some before tossing him back in the ring. Rey goes to enter the ring, but Ashley give a tug on his boot holding him back. Rey gives a kick to Ashley and frees himself long enough to return to the ring, but the distraction worked. Helms was able to recover and catch Rey as he spun around with a DDT, planting Mysterio’s head into the canvas. Helms climbs up on his feet and begins to pound away at the body of Mysterio, who is dazed. Helms backs off and waits for Mysterio to reach his feet, before charging. Mysterio delivers a back body drop over the top rope! However Helms lands on the apron, and grabs the unsuspecting Mysterio by the neck, before pulling a hang man on Mysterio. Helms drops the floor, as Mysterio flies back towards the center of the ring. Ashley loves what she is seeing and gives her man a huge sloppy kiss while he is on the outside. After this though, Helms waists no time in climbing back up on the apron, then climbing up to the top rope. Ashley cheers on her man, as Helms turns around backwards and nails a moonsault… on an empty canvas! Mysterio moves out of the way at the last moment and Helms crashes into the empty canvas. Helms slowly climbs up to his feet, but Mysterio explodes off the ropes with a head scissors that sends Helms flying head over heels onto the canvas once more. Rey waits for Helms to get up to his feet, before diving with a headbutt to the groin, ala Spike Dudley. Helms slumps over in pain, but Rey stays on the assault connecting with a face buster to Helms! The crowd is going wild, as Mysterio rolls out onto the apron and heads up to the top rope. Rey seems to be in total control of the match at this point. Ashley is going bonkers on the outside. Gregory Helms pulls himself up to his feet, as Rey mounts himself on the top rope. Rey jumps off and executes a missle dropkick that catches Helms flush in the jaw! Helms flies backwards, landing on the middle rope. The crowd is going nuts at this point. Gregory Helms is motionless on the ropes, with Ashley standing feet away, on the outside, totally helpless. Rey Mysterio motions for the 619! Rey bounce off the ropes and goes for the 619, but at the last moment, Ashley dives in the way, shoving Helms out of the ropes and back into the ring, forcing Rey to miss totally and land back in the ring totally disoriented. The ref darts towards Ashley and begins screaming at her to stay out of the action! Helms uses the ref’s distraction to execute a low blow to Rey Mysterio from behind. SHINNING WIZARD! The Cruiserweight Champ drills Rey with his enziguri finisher. Rey falls forward from the kick, landing right on top of the middle rope. Greg goes to pull Rey off the ropes, but pauses, as an evil smirk grows across his face, as he looks at Rey Mysterio helpless on the middle rope. Helms charges the ropes and hits his own version of the 6-1-9! The crowd erupts into a loud chorus of boos as Helms makes the cover, 1-2-3! Helms defeats Rey Mysterio with his own move! Ashley is going crazy on the outside, and after grabbing the Cruiserweight Championship, slides into the ring and leaps into her man’s arms. The two celebrate the victory as fans erupt into a loud chorus of boos and jeer.

    ©Gregory Helms defeats Rey Mysterio to RETAIN the Cruiserweight Championship!

    [- The Birth of the E-Division on Smackdown! -]

    -The scene fades backstage where we see Smackdown General Manager, Paul Heyman sitting behind his desk with a championship belt in front of him, with the letter ‘E’ plastered on the front.-

    Paul Heyman: Hello, My name is Paul Heyman and for those of you who do not know, I am once again Smackdown’s General Manager. I would like to thank you for joining us tonight, and I hope you are enjoying the Royal Rumble. For anyone who has followed my career, they know I am not a figure head who loves to soak up camera time, so I assure you that I will make this announcement very quick, so that you may return to the high quality action that Smackdown offers….

    -Something from behind the camera, catches Heyman’s attention which breaks his focus.-

    Paul Heyman: Oh yeah, and Raw too.

    -Heyman looks back off the camera, and gives a total death stare. After a few moments, he turns back towards the camera, and finishes his thought.-

    Paul Heyman: As I was saying, I am not one to hog up all the camera time, but tonight is a special night. Tonight, I am announcing the creation, not only of a new championship on Smackdown, but an entire new division. This division will be called the ‘E’ Division, and will feature some of the most ‘Extreme’ wrestlers in our industry. This division will have its own championship belt, the ‘E Title’, and along with a set of unique rules that will only apply to this division. In the interest of fairness I am banning all outside interference during a ‘E Division Match’. If a person, being a wrestler or manager, elects to interfere in a match, they will be subjected to a thirty-day suspension, and possible removal from the WWE. Future more, all matches in the ‘E Division’ will be decided by either pinfall, or submission. There will be count outs or Disqualifications. Under these rules, a chair shot will be just as legal as a wristlock. This division will start having qualifying matches starting next week on Smackdown, with a champion to be determined at next month’s Saturday Night Main Event’, in its own special match.

    -Heyman looks off camera once more, waiting to see if they hve any more interruptions.-

    Paul Heyman: I would like to thank you for your time, and now will allow you to return to the high quality action of Smackdown

    … oh yeah, and Raw.

    -End of feed.-

    JoeyStyles: What a huge announcement Tazz!

    Tazz; The E-Division… it sounds cool. I dig it.

    JoeyStyles: I can’t wait to see the division debut, but Tazz, another title I have been interested in over the past month, has been the United States Championship.

    Tazz: No doubt Styles! You said it best; this ‘Best of 5 Series’ between CM Punk and Chris Benoit has been wrestling’s version of ‘eye candy’, with the two best wrestlers in the industry today hooking it up in four classic matches.

    JoeyStyles: Chris Benoit stole the first two with that explosive ‘Crossface’ finisher, however Punk has been able to reverse the curse’, sort of speak, and pick up two wins by reversing the Crossface with pinfall victories. However tonight, Tazz if CM Punk wants to leave here the United States Champion, he is going to have to do something not a lot of other guys in this industry have ever done, he has to make Chris Benoit tap.

    Tazz: No doubt, that may be mission impossible for this kid. Now don’t get me wrong, I love CM Punk. I think the kid has a bright future, but asking him to make Chris Benoit tap, may be a little more then he is ready for at this point.

    I AM FOR REAL!

    -These words scream out over the speakers as the United States Champion makes his way out onto the stage sporting a ‘Viva La Raza’ shirt in rememberance of his late friend, Eddie Guerrero. The fans love this, and give him a louder then normal reaction. Benoit rolls into the ring, then tosses the shirt into the first row as he waits for his challenger.-

    RRUSTitle.jpg

    ANNOUNCER: Our next match the finale to the best of five series for the United States Championship! This match is set for a submission only finish, for the United States Championship! Introducing first, reigning from Atlanta, GA, he is the current United States Champion… CHRIS BENOIT!!!

    I AM STRAIGHT EDGE

    That Means I Am Better Then You!

    ANNOUNCER: And making his way to the ring at this time, he reigns from Chicago, IL. He is the ‘Straight Edge Superstar’…. CM PUNK!

    The music of CM Punk hits as he enters the arena. Punk makes his way out onto the stage, and does his Straight Edge X with his arms, as pyros fall from the ceiling behind him. Punk walks down the ramp and enters the ring, mounting the ropes and making the Straight Edge X again. The bell rings and the two immediately begin exchanging stiff chops to the chest, to which Benoit gains the advantage in. Punk falls back into the ropes after receiving Benoit’s famous chops to the chest. After Benoit is finished, he whips Punk off the ropes and then takes him over with a Japanese Arm Drag. Punk bounces off the canvas, but both men spring right back up to their feet. Benoit levels Punk with another chop, before whipping him into the corner but Punk grabs the top rope with both hands and does a handstand, leapfrogging the charging Benoit who runs right into the turnbuckle. Punk explodes with a lariat right to the jaw of Benoit sending the champion crashing to the canvas. Punk waits for Benoit to reach his feet, but once there he charges at Chris Benoit but the Crippler drops to the canvas at the very last second and lets Punk rush right on by him. As Punk bounces off the ropes, the champ locks CM Punk in a Spinning Toe Hold! Punk crashes face first into the canvas. Benoit pulls himself up and grabs the doubled over challenger as he’s holding his gut and applies an Arm Wrench, but Punk reverses! Punk holds onto the arm bar, as he climbs up the ropes to the top! Punk walks the ropes holding the United States Champion arm but Benoit throws Punk off the top with a jerk of the arm, sending him crashing to the mat. Benoit shakes off his arm to get the feeling back in it and as Punk pulls himself up to his feet. Benoit moves in for the attack. He grabs Punk by the head and rams his own head into the skull of CM Punk with a violent headbutt. Punk falls back into the corner, but the Rabid Wolverine stays on the attack, moving into position, before leveling Punk with a second head butt, followed by a third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, and eighth! Punk is totally wasted at this point, as Benoit grabs Punk by the hair and pulls him to the center of the ring. Benoit hooks Punk up in an old fashion suplex position, and executes a picture, perfect suplex. However, Benoit refuses to let go of the hold, and actually pulls Punk back up to his feet, before executing a second suplex! The crowd realizes what is going on at this point and cheers Benoit, as the United States Champ pulls Punk back up to his feet and executes a third suplex. Benoit releases the hold, and jumps up to his feet, before shivering his shoulders, ala Eddie Guerrero, before beating his chest and pointing up at the sky. The crowd loves this, and gives Benoit a huge ovation, seeing how San Antonio is ‘Eddie Guerrero Country’. A loud chant breaks out throughout the arena of ‘Eddie, Eddie, Eddie’. The US champ acknowledges the chant, and points back up to the sky once more in remembrance of his late friend, before turning his attention back to his opponent. Benoit grabs Punk by the hair once more, and pulls him up to his feet. Benoit slings Punk into the ropes, or at least attempts to, but the Punkster is able to reverse the move and sling Benoit across the ring. Benoit bounces off the ropes and upon returning to the ‘Straight Edge’ superstar, Punk dumps him over his head, and over the top rope, with a backdrop! Benoit flies over the top rope and crashes onto the floor below. Punk waits as Benoit slowly pulls himself up to his feet, by way of the announce table. As soon as Benoit reaches his feet, Punk charges the other side of the ring. Punk then explodes between the top and middle rope, landing a suicide dive on the United States Champion! Both men crash to floor. After a few moments, Punk pulls himself up to his feet, but Benoit is still motionless on the floor below. CM Punk jumps up onto the apron. He looks down at Benoit, who is still motionless, then climbs up onto the top rope. Punk looks over his shoulder once more, to make sure Benoit hasn’t moved, then leaps off executing a MOONSAULT! The crowd goes bonkers as Punk lands a moonsault from the top rope, onto the outside floor! The AT&T Center is going crazy as both Punk and Benoit, roll around on the floor, selling the effects from that move. Punk is the first to reach his feet, and he climbs up onto the apron. Benoit springs up to his feet very quickly however and grabs Punk from underneath, powerbombing Punk off the apron and onto the floor! Punk’s head makes a sick ‘thud’ as it bounces off the matted floor. Benoit looks down, with that blank look of aggression. He reaches down and picks up Punk by the hair, before rolling him into the ring. Benoit jumps up on the apron, then climbs up to the top rope. He balances himself at the top of the ropes, before leaping off with his diving head butt! Benoit connects with an empty canvas however, with Punk rolling out of the way at the very last moment. Benoit rolls around after smashing his head into the canvas, with Punk resting up for a moment after taking a few big ‘bumps’. Both men are physically fatigued at this point. Both men pull themselves up to their feet, with the younger Punk being the first to reach his feet. Punk dives wildly at Benoit, making the first real critical mistake of the match. Benoit makes him pay by side stepping the wild attempt, before applying the CROSSFACE! Punk is locked in the middle of the ring with nowhere to go! The crowd goes nuts as Benoit tightens the grip with Punk looking franticly for a way out. Benoit has learned his lesson however and tightens the hold, not giving Punk an avenue of escape. Benoit pulls back harder, attempting to tighten the hold even more so, however in doing so, he slips with his hold. This mistake gives Punk the chance he needs! He rolls over facing Benoit and rolls Benoit into position for the ANACONDA VICE! Now it is Punk who has the move locked on the champion in the middle of the ring. Benoit tries wildly to escape the hold, but the more he fights the hold, the tighter Punk is able to apply the hold. Benoit is slowly starting to lose conciseness, and just before he passing the point of passing out he begins to tap the arm of Punk! The ref calls for the bell, which allows Punk to break the hold! Punk rolls over on his back, with Benoit rolling over face down, both from shame and exhaustion. CM climbs up to his knees, and that is where the ref hands him the United States Championship. Punk embraces the title, as the crowd eats it up. Benoit rolls out of the ring and heads up the entrance ramp without acknowledging the ring in the least. Punk meanwhile celebrates inside the squared circle.

    CM Punk defeats Chris Benoit to WIN the United States Championship!

  19. I typically don't get into music much, but there are a few songs that I have on my Ipod that I still listen to about 17 billion times.

    Ne-Yo 'Sexy Love' This dude is awesome, even though I probably butchered the f*ck out of his name. . I'm probably gonna get flamed for saying it, but its true. I have his album, and love literally every song. Coming from someone who has extremely finkle taste in music, that is an accomplishment. This is his best song without question.

    Hinder's 'Lips of an Angel' This is actually my 'secret weapon' song. Play it for a girl, and watch them melt. I can't figure it out actually, since the song is about cheating. I guess they hear Lips and Angel, and just tune out the rest. I dunno. I just know it works... at least for me. Plus I saw them LIVE and they aren't that bad, not great, but not bad.

    All American Rejects "It Ends Tonight" For a rock group that is about as pop as Nickelback, this song stands out as something that I could actually hear Coldplay or U2 do. It doesn't make me change my idea about the band, but at least I do like this song. Maybe more of this, and less of 'Dirty Little Secret'.

    Mario Vazquez 'Gallery' I actually heard this song before it was released from a cousin who works for a radio station in LA, and I loved it from the very begining. I doubt this cat will do anything else, but that doesn't changn the fact I like this song.

    Rasical Flatt 'What Hurts the Most' I normally hold a grudge agaisnt country, and admittingly won't give anything a chance if I hear the words 'country', but I was able to catch this song before I realized they were a country band. The singer has a very unique voice, and it works for this song. Not great, but pretty good song.

    Damn, I just read over my list and realize I let the women in my life have WAY too much control over the music I listen too. New resolution, take back control of the Ipod!

  20. I already replied once to 'No Way Out, but I thought I would be more detailed, now that I have had an opportunity to read it over a couple of times.

    Edge def. Lance Storm

    This match was a toss up to me. It could have gone either way, and really both men could have used the rub. Edge is younger, so it makes sense to give him the rub in these sort of spots, but either way you would have went would have been understandable.

    Trish def. Jazz and Daffney to retain the WWF Women's Title

    I absolutely love Trish Stratus. I totally marked out for her when she was wrestling, not because she was attractive, but because she could actually wrestle... at least according to Diva standards. Trish makes the perfect Woman's champ, and should be to that title, what Triple H and Jeff Jarrett is to the real life World Title. However with that said, in order to fully take advantage of Trish, she needs a legit rival... something she never really had in the WWE. Lita was OK, but was clearly a distant second behind her. I wouldn't mind... in fact I expect Daffney to get the title at 'Mania, and I actually hope she does, so that Daffney can begin to separate herself from the pack, and we see a great diva rivalry.

    Rob Van Dam def. Kurt Angle

    As I stated in my predictions, I'm too big of a Kurt Angle mark to be really biased on this, but I really wished Angle would have went over on this one. His upside is far more better, IMO, then RVD's, however I guess you can't win them all, and RVD is defiantly a solid choice to go over Angle.

    Key def. Sabu to retain the WWF Hardcore Title

    I actually would have liked to see Sabu with the win on this one, but it appears that the title is going to stay on Key until 'Mania where it may go to Raven? Or someone else like that. So I'm cool with it. Key is an accepted champion, which for the Hardcore title is really all you need since that title is about as much image as any other lower tier title.

    The Rock def. Vince McMahon and The British Bulldog to retain the WWF Title

    To be perfectly honest, when I read this the first time, I didn't like it at all. You put Vince McMahon over one of your biggest stars, and really gained nothing for it. I mean, he’s the owner, he doesn’t need to be ‘put over’, by anyone. At first I took it as you just wanting a 'swerve', and done so at your Champion's expense. However, you typically book very well, and so booking just to 'swerve' isn't what you would normally do. So I started thinking about why the match went down the way it did, and I've come to the conclusion that this is actually typical classic WWE, a swerve to set up a swerve. I'm not gonna say what I think is going to happen, for fear that I may be right, but if I am right, I love the way this planned out. However if this was booked just as a single 'swerve', or if you put over McMahon, at the expense of your Champion, I don't really care much for the move at all, especially since Wrestlemania is right around the corner.

    Kane def. Stone Cold

    I would be careful on using Stone Cold as someone who you ‘put guys over with’. Don’t get me wrong, putting Kane over Austin, makes Kane seem like an absolute monster, but Austin isn’t someone who is very good at putting people over, because his character is typically someone who always gets people back. Good win for Kane though.

    The Undertaker def. Test

    This was actually a semi-predictable result, but one in which I think really helped Test as a upper tier wrestler, despite losing so I’m glad you played things out the way you did, and I LOVE the news flash, about Taker refusing to put over Test, future making this result more believable and helps lessen the ‘sting’ from Test with losing to ‘Taker.

    As I said earlier, good stuff. Only real ‘problem’ I had, was with the Rock match, but if I am correct on where its going, I absolutely love even that booking. I can’t wait for Rock/Taker at Maina. Keep up the solid work.

  21. Good Stuff DaveKOTW. I'm glad to see the title stayed on the Rock., but a few of the matches shocked me with the outcome, which is a good thing I suupose, since if everything was predictable, this wouldn't be a worthwhile diary to read. Wrestlemania is shaping up to be pretty nice, I can't wait for it. Keep up the good work.

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