TheRyno

Gorbachov - The Music Video

I'm not really sure what to think, just watch it and be amazed.

By the way, it a pretty high-quality video so you may want to let it load for a bit. I have a decent computer and it still had some choppiness.

Case in point: It wasn't until I listened to the commentary for Resident Evil that I realized Milla Jovovich is actually a valley girl.

Ok, well maybe it wasn't "marketed" as a children's fantasy film, but that didn't stop stupid parents from thinking it was.

From imdb.com:

After the first week movie theaters in Mexico had to place signs over the movie posters warning about the graphic violence as parents were taking small children to see it.

And this Photoshopped poster from Something Awful pretty much sums it up.

I haven't seen it myself but everyone I know that has seen Pan's Labyrinth hated it, mostly because it was marketed towards children as a fantasy film. And the fact that most of the villains in Hellboy 2 look modeled after the styles of creatures in Pan's Labyrinth actually makes me wanna see it less.

Yes, be whisked away to a far away land where magic reigns and its cool to jack people in the face with a bottle.

If someone tries to remake those movies, I'm gonna punch them. Those movies are fine the way they are.

By the way, if you can, pick up Ultimate Versus. Basically they just added some new/extended fight scenes but they're badass as hell.

Also, even though I have it on DVD, I'm still pretty pumped to see Machine Girl at this convention I'm going to in August.

I have Frontiers, Diary of the Dead, Teeth, Midnight Meat Train (Love me some Clive Barker!), Inside, Baghead, Behind the Mask:The Rise of Leslie Veron, Who Could Kill a Child, Vistor Q, Calvaire and Going to Pieces:The Rise and Fall of the Slasher Film, among many others queued on Netflix. I've also started rewatching many of my favorites such as Carnival of Souls, The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, and all things Dario Argento.

How is Visitor Q? Between that and the Dead Or Alive movies, they're the Takashii Miike movies that I've wanted to see for years but never got to.

By the way, even though it isn't horror, check out Park Chan-wook's JSA, if you haven't already. I just picked it up a month or so ago (for $2 at Gamestop, no less) and it was awesome. I'm not sure if it edges out Sympathy For Mr. Vengance as my favorite movie of his yet but it's close.

Best Movie Commentary - Cannibal: The Musical for reasons I've already mentioned.

Best TV Commentary - Mr. Show. All 4 seasons have cast commentary and it's non-stop hilarity.

Worst Movie Commentary - The Exorcist. William Friedkin's commentary for "The Version You've Never Seen" is horrible just because all he does is describe things as they happen in the movie. Not how he did them or how things were filmed, nothing. The entire movie is him going "Here's the part where this guy does this. And now this guy says something. And now they're doing this." The only use I could think of is if some blind person was trying to watch the movie and needed things described to them, but the original dialogue would've done a better job of that anyways.

I find Hellraiser to be a very overrated film. It is not scary or frightening to me, it all just seems cheesy. The sequels don't even deserve a mention.

I hate the horror genre so much. Too much torture-porn and asian influenced movies. The latter is the worst - there are like a million movies with pale little asian kids and wet looking girls twitching down hallways, it all just looks dumb.

This opinion is well-informed.

Well, considering all the stuff that's been released in mainstream theaters...he's kinda right. I can honestly say I've never seen a Japanese remake. Even so, some of the originals are pretty meh. I bought Ju-On once and was bored out of my mind. The only real redeeming quality of it was that one of the girls was really cute.

See, that's why I'm hoping that all these straight-to-DVD movies will somehow revitalize the genre instead of reducing it to popcorn fodder for fifteen year olds. Even though the budgets are bigger (for the most part), it still reminds me of the 80's video scene where directors could pretty much do whatever they want.

Also...did you find out when Wizard of Gore is being released, or just that it is?

August 19th

I love horror too but I haven't been able to keep track of it as much as I used to. But now, I just spent the past half hour or so at BloodyDisgusting.com. Right now, I'm reading an article about Midnight Meat Train ( ). Not only is it a horror movie with a gay porno title directed by the director of Versus (one of my favorite movies ever) but it has Vinnie Jones as the bad guy and Quentin "Rampage" Jackson (aka Master Chief Wif Gold Teef). This movie has awesome written all over it.

After learning that the Wizard of Gore remake is being released to DVD under the "Dimension Extreme" imprint, it got me to wondering about all the other horror movies that have been released lately. It seems that there have been a ton of them in the past year alone between Dimension Extreme, After Dark Horrorfest and other DVD imprints and I've been wondering if they're any good. I've been meaning to pick up Diary of the Dead and Teeth lately and, from what I've heard, Frontier(s) sounds pretty good.

So yeah, basically I've just been wanting to see some good horror movies lately but I'm not really sure what to plunk the money down for. But to stimulate some actual conversation, think about this: Do you think these constant DVD releases are almost a revival of the horror video scene of the 80's?

Yeah, I figured the black angel was some sort of dream or hallucination, kinda like the whole "blood trail" level in the first game (which BTW was one of the coolest moments in any video game ever).

I used to listen to commentary all the time when I lived at my parents' house and holed myself up in my bedroom. But now that I'm sharing a 2 bedroom apartment with a bunch of dudes, it's kinda hard to do anymore.

However, there is one Commentary that needs to be listened to by everyone and that is the one for Cannibal: The Musical. Trey Parker and Matt Stone (and others) decide to get drunk for hilarious results. Basically, he reveals that the plot of the lead's horse running away was an allusion to his girlfriend at the time dumping him. By the end of the movie, he's talking about how he's worth $20 million and the guy she dumped him for is a restaurant manager.

A week or so ago, I finally watched Hellboy for the first time through. To me, it was pretty good but nothing mind-blowing. So I probably won't see Hellboy 2 right away. But my big beef with it beyond that is that it looks more like "Hellboy vs Pan's Labyrinth" instead of an actual Hellboy movie.

By the way, I hope nothing becomes the next "I Drink Your Milkshake" of anything. Ever.

From the looks of it, it could be on par with Sin City in terms of awesomeness.

But all the dialogue has to be in comic boxes. Has to. It's vital.

The Wizard Of Gore was pretty disturbing for all it's awesomeness. The pure gore of it was quite overwhelming. (The original, I never bothered to see the remake) The flim that disturbed me the most is Odishon/Audition. The last ten minutes was so very freaking hard to watch. I'm sure it has much to do with my fear of needles, but I have never felt so claustophobic and full of anxiety in my life. I had nightmares for weeks of her going "Tee tee tee tee tee tee tee" The disturbing film that mesmerized me is Guinea Pig Films The Flower Of Flesh and Blood. This "snuff" film (don't worry folks it's not real, tho some thought it was) makes dismemberment an art.

Biggest let down? Murder-Set Pieces. Truly a movie all about hype. I was frankly bored and pissed I spent money to rent it.

I probably would have been disturbed by Audition had I not known everything about it before seeing it. When I finally got a hold of a copy, I was just sitting there for an hour plus just saying "C'mon, get to the good stuff!" Not to say it's not a good movie, which it is, but I kinda ruined it for myself.

As for Wizard of Gore, Herschell Gordon Lewis is a genius to pull off such gory effects like that in the 60's. I have that, 10,000 Maniacs and The Gore Gore Girls (my personal favorite) and I love them all. Way ahead of his time.

By the way, my most disturbing movie has to be Cannibal Holocaust. There have only been two movies I've ever seen that has made me feel dirty and less of a person for watching them. The first was Ichi The Killer but I got over it by the second or third viewing. But Cannibal Holocaust was rough. I had to turn it off when the tribesman was punishing his woman by raping her with a rock because it was making me ill, and I had to wait a few more days until I got the courage to finish it. After that, it wasn't too bad but it was still disturbing. Plus all of the animal killing was so unnecessary.

By the way, I haven't seen any of the Guinea Pig series. If I had the money and the movies readily available to me (ie not ordering it on the internet and waiting weeks for shipping), I'd give it a shot. But I'm still kinda afraid to.

After the torture that was buying a 'pint', I head on off to catch Chiodos on the main stage. Again, I wasn't really digging them. Singer sounded like he wanted to be in a Coheed & Cambria tribute band. They ripped on the 14 year old emo fucks...but then again...when like 90% of your audience are made up of them... not really a good thing to do. They had energy, and I quite liked their 'attitude', to a certan extent, but I really was not digging their music at all, and neither was anybody I was with. There was seemingly plenty of people into it though. So, go them!

I hear this. The last concert I went to was Coheed/Dillinger Escape Plan/Chiodos/3 a year or two ago. I really wanted to like Chiodos but I just couldn't. I was instantly pumped when they decided to take the stage to The Undertaker's theme song but whenever they would start to sound good, they'd break down into some whiny emo shit. My friends went to the bar after the first song but I stayed and gave them a chance...until halfway through the second song. I just couldn't take it.

As an aside, that show as a whole was weird. My friends and I were impressed by 3 despite never hearing of them before. Chiodos sucked as mentioned above. My friends were confused by DEP, who I personally came to see. But I couldn't say that their performance was that great, especially considering that their lead guitarist had dropped off the tour for a few shows due to being extremely sick and/or injured. You could tell that Greg, the singer, was pissed at performing in front of nothing but unappreciative 14 year old emo kids as there was no in-between song banter or anything. In fact, I think he tried to injure himself a few times. A few seconds into the first song, he made a perfect somersault senton into the crowd. Then near the end of the final song, he climbed up a shaky stack of amps, causing all the stagehands to frantically run up to the stage and hold them in place so he wouldn't fall off and break his neck. Not to mention the fact that DEP's drummer would soon leave them for Coheed makes the show even weirder in retrospect. As for Coheed, I wouldn't consider myself a huge fan but they do a great live show. Of course, the fact that the sound system was louder for them than anyone else probably helped too. The fat kid in front of me raising his hands and shaking his head like seeing Coheed was a religious experience was a bit much, though, but that was made up for a 14 year old emo girl being hit on by a 40 year old drunk Mexican who happened to stumble into the show after a hard day's work.

Proof that I have too many DVDs, here's all my music DVDs straight from my list:

Bleeding Through - This Is Live, This Is Murderous

Bleeding Through - Wolves Among Sheep

Bloodhound Gang - One Fierce Beer Run

CKY - Infiltrate Destroy Rebuild: The Video Album

Cradle of Filth - Heavy, Left-Handed and Candid

Cradle of Filth - PanDaemonAeon

Cradle of Filth - Peace Through Superior Firepower

Darkest Hour - Party Scars and Prison Bars: A Thrashography

Dillinger Escape Plan - Miss Machine The DVD

GG Allin and the Murder Junkies - Hated

GG Allin and the Murder Junkies - Raw, Brutal, Rough and Bloody: The Best of 1991 Live

GWAR - The Ultimate Video GWARchive

Hellfest Vol. 3

HIM - The Video Collection: 1997-2003

HIM - Love Metal Archives Vol. 1

Himsa - You've Seen Too Much: Live in Seattle 2004

Lamb of God - Killadelphia

Mastodon - The Workhorse Chronicles: The Early Years 2000-2005

Metal Hammer Golden Gods 2006

Mindless Self Indulgence - Our Pain Your Gain

New England Metal and Hardcore Festival 2003

Opeth - Lamentations: Live at Shepherd's Bush Empire 2003

Orgy - Trans Global Spectacle: 1997-2004

Recollection 3: Relapse Video Collection

Relapse Contamination Festival 2003

Skinless - Skinflick

Slipknot - Disasterpieces

Tenacious D - The Complete Masterworks

I'm not even going into my CDs that came with bonus DVDs. All things considered, besided the MSI DVD, I haven't bought a music DVD in years and I think I sold a couple more. I've gotten out of the loop but I'm really tempted to pick up Muse's live CD/DVD.

http://www.playthings.com/article/CA6560769.html

Under the terms of the deal, Hasbro has regained ownership of nearly 1,000 episodes of TV programming featuring more than 30 of the toymaker’s key brands, including G.I. Joe, Transformers, My Little Pony, Littlest Pet Shop, Mr. Potato Head and Connect Four. The acquisition effectively doubles Hasbro’s content library to nearly 2,000 episodes of programming.

Awesome. I kind of hope Hasbro will release some of that stuff on DVD.

Explain. What does Connect Four have to do with TV episodes?

Unless there is a Connect Four Cartoon out there that I'm missing?

I was thinking the same thing. I don't remember there being a Mr. Potato Head cartoon either, but that would've been pretty cool if there was one.

I haven't played that many games lately and it's gotten to the point where I've been putting off buying Greatest Hits and budget titles. Right now, the games I've wanted to play but haven't gotten around to buying are Mortal Kombat Armageddon, SvR 2007 and Jackass: The Game. I was really close to buying MK yesterday but put it back on the rack yet again.

Muse. I didn't start until right when Black Holes and Revelations came out and now Absolution is one of my favorite albums of all time.

I had heard Hysteria and New Born a few times before I never really checked them out until you guys started blowing a nut when they announced Knights of Cydonia would be in Guitar Hero 3. I must say, though, I'm not a huge fan of most of their slower songs unless I'm in the mood for them. But their rocking songs are always great.

I listen to about 75% metal and when I say metal, I mean just about everything in the genre not "power" (save for Dragonforce and a few others) or "glam", but I love 80's new wave. That's mostly because it's what I grew up with. Something about cheesy synths and androgyny makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. In fact, it reinforced a belief in me that "keyboards makes everything better".

An infomercial came on for a 2-set of 90's techno CDs (on Telemundo, no less), mostly the kind sung by females such as ATC and Alice Deejay. I wanted it.

t.A.T.u. is awesome but I haven't listened to them in a while as I just have their first CD. I was shocked to find that they have a "Best of" out and was very close to buying it. Also, I'm really digging Justin Timberlake now but he's about the only thing on mainstream radio that I'd actually listen to.

I don't know what I just saw or heard.

But I will go on record to say that "Jehovah's Fitness" is the best band name I've heard this year.

I love Patton but I really can't get behind his pop/hip-hop stuff, though I'm not a big fan of the genre in the first place. You think it'd take a musical genius like Patton for me to come around to it but it doesn't. I really dug his A Perfect Place score, though.

Yeah, pretty much.

Well, I didn't make it on to the show. Through some general shenanigans on VH1's part that I don't feel like going into right now, I'm out of the running. Thanks for trying, though.