The Bowl Games as a Wrestling Show

[The Third Dukes]

A little mental exercise I gave myself: take the last 16 bowl games (from 12/30 - 1/4) and try to tell a wrestling fan not from America why each game is so cool. Pretend for a moment that the colleges are pro wrestlers, and this is a supercard taking place over two days. There are 8 games on 12/30 and 12/31, plus 8 more from 1/1 to 1/4. So, split it into two "nights" of action, and let's see what we get...

***NIGHT 1***

2004's final games (12/30 to 12/31)

CONTINENTAL BOWL: Boston College vs. North Carolina from Charlotte, NC

Wrestling Equivalent: Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz, Royal Rumble 2000

This is a good way to open the first "day". You have two teams that are middle-of-the pack, but have an intriguing storyline (Boston College will join North Carolina's conference next year) and some very good players playing their final game. On top of this, there will be a VERY vocal UNC contingent as the game is in their backyard. A good, hot opener.

EMERALD BOWL: Navy vs. New Mexico from San Francisco, CA

Wrestling Equivalent: Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Stasiak, Survivor Series 1999

Navy is head-and-shoulders the better team here, and part of that is that they have a legitimate talent who will play in the pros. The comparison to Kurt may seem far-fetched -- and I never expect Navy to even play for a national title any time soon -- but I chose it due to the "traditional" feel of watching a service academy game. New Mexico is a heavy underdog.

HOLIDAY BOWL: California vs. Texas Tech from San Diego, CA

Wrestling Equivalent: Rob Van Dam vs. Ric Flair, No Mercy 2002

Now here's a fun storyline: California is 10-1, and their sole loss is against USC, who will be featured in the national title game. Because of this, many Bears fans assumed they'd get an invitation to the Rose Bowl or another high-profile matchup. Instead, the Rose Bowl invitation went to Texas, whose coach actively camapaigned for the bowl berth and who was aided by the Coaches' Poll, which vaulted Texas over California by enough votes to make the decision automatic. So now, an angry California team has to settle for a lower-level matchup against Texas Tech, which is in Texas' conference. Revenge should be sweet.

SILICON VALLEY CLASSIC: Northern Illinois vs. Troy State from San Jose, CA

Wrestling Equivalent: Norman Smiley vs. Prince Iaukea, StarrCade 1998

Well, they can't all be winners.

MUSIC CITY BOWL: Alabama vs. Minnesota from Nashville, TN

Wrestling Equivalent: DDP vs. Christian, WrestleMania X8

This game has been hastily thrown together, and the two sides seem average at this point. Alabama is a traditional power and has titles won, but in recent times has sputtered. Minnesota began looking like possible conference champions before going on a hellacious losing streak that nearly derailed their chances of qualifying for ANY bowl. Both teams are looking to save face here.

SUN BOWL: Purdue vs. Arizona State from El Paso, TX

Wrestling Equivalent: Test vs. Kane, No Mercy 2001

Arizona State has been a classic Bad Good Team this year -- they went 8-3, with two of their losses horrific beatings at the hands of California and USC (the other was to their big rival). Purdue is a team that seems to get good once every 4-5 years, then disappears to mediocrity. This year, they seemed to look good, but like Minnesota, they spun out and nearly wrecked the season. This will be an interesting case -- is Purdue that bad? Is ASU good? Who knows?

LIBERTY BOWL: Boise State vs. Louisville from Memphis, TN

Wrestling Equivalent: Ron Killings vs. Jerry Lynn, NWATNA 2002

Now *this* is legitimately the highlight of the first "day". These two teams both cracked the Top 10 despite not being from strong conferences -- and you can think of the lesser conferences much as you do NJPW Juniors or NWATNA's X Division. Both teams have sensational, high-octane offenses, and both ran the table in their conferences en route to a combined 21-1 record -- with Louisville bearing the only loss on a last-second score on the road. This isn't about who wins or loses -- well, it is, but that's not what we'll be talking about. This will be both teams' coming out party.

PEACH BOWL: Miami vs. Florida from Atlanta, GA

Wrestling Equivalent: Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels, Badd Blood 2004

These are two very proud organizations, both of whom have been champions. And they just plain don't like each other. The last time they met in a bowl game (the Sugar Bowl of about 5 years ago) a fight broke out in the hotel room where the teams were staying. Both of these teams expected better than this, and this will be a way for them to salvage pride. But above all, it's a grudge match. A nice way to close out Night 1.

***NIGHT 2***

Ringing in 2005 (1/1 to 1/4)

COTTON BOWL: Tennessee vs. Texas A&M from Dallas, TX

Wrestling Equivalent: Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan, Mid-South territory 1983

Both of these teams are young, and both are GOOD -- A&M nearly knocked off Texas and Oklahoma, while Tennessee played even with Auburn for most of the SEC title game. The winner of this game will definitely be considered one of next year's title contenders, since both teams return most of their players next year.

OUTBACK BOWL: Wisconsin vs. Georgia from Tampa, FL

Wrestling Equivalent: Kurt Angle vs. Edge, Backlash 2002

Wisconsin was 9-0 at one point this year and seemed destined to make the Rose Bowl, but they suddenly went into a tailspin, losing two games where they were heavy favorites. Georgia, on the other hand, has played respectably all season, with their only losses coming to Tennessee and Auburn, SEC title game opponents. Both are very good, and both feel that they don't get respect.

GATOR BOWL: Florida State vs. West Virginia from Jacksonville, FL

Wrestling Equivalent: Bret Hart vs. Booker T, Bash at the Beach 1998

One side clearly seems to be better than the other in this one -- FSU had national title aspirations, whereas West Virginia figured they would win their conference in a walk but that was all. Needless to say, both are disappointed to be here, but it's a big bowl game -- even if one side seems to be the overwhelming favorite. Playing in the Florida Panhandle -- FSU's home turf -- is a nice bonus.

CAPITAL ONE BOWL: Iowa vs. LSU from Orlando, FL

Wrestling Equivalent: Verne Gagne vs. Nick Bockwinkle, AWA 1975

Both of these teams win with defenses that are strong, offenses that do just enough, and head coaches that know how to push the right buttons and get results. This is probably going to be a very old-school throwback grind out game, and as such won't be visually exciting, but will be one the purists will definitely appreciate.

ROSE BOWL: Michigan vs. Texas from Pasadena, CA

Wrestling Equivalent: Triple H vs. Undertaker, WrestleMania X-7

The comparison in wrestling is an easy one: these are two of the programs with the best history in college football. Both have won multiple titles, and both are among the Top 10 in total wins all-time. Both are also really good this year, too, with Michigan boasting two freshmen sensations in the backfield and Texas with a running back likely to be an NFL star. But what makes this comparison especially apt is this surprising fact: the two programs have somehow never met before, despite being national powerhouses for the past two decades or more. Throw in legions of loyal fans who will sell out the stadium -- which itself holds 100,000 -- and this will be an amazingly hot showdown.

FIESTA BOWL: Utah vs. Pittsburgh from Tempe, AZ

Wrestling Equivalent: AJ Styles vs. Jeff Jarrett, NWATNA 2003

Remember the comparison I made of the lower leagues to the X Division? Well, Utah is the AJ Styles of that division: they have a high-powered enough offense that got them a modicum of respect before the season started, then ran the table and became the first "small" program to make one of the four "big-time" bowls since the current system was installed for the 1998 season. In this game, though, the pressure's all on them: Pittsburgh has little national reputation, and a Utah loss would damage not just them, but the lesser schools as a whole.

SUGAR BOWL: Auburn vs. Virginia Tech from New Orleans, LA

Wrestling Equivalent: Kurt Angle vs. Kane, WrestleMania X8

Auburn is really ticked. Many people feel they should be in the national title game, but here they are, "relegated" to "only" a big-time bowl. They'll be looking to take out their frustrations on an underrated Virginia Tech team that held their own with USC in the season opener and startled everyone by winning their conference in their first year in it. Both teams have very loyal fans, and both have been known to "travel well" -- so the place will be packed with partisans. Virginia Tech may surprise people, but we all anticipate a very good game.

ORANGE BOWL: USC vs. Oklahoma from Miami, FL

Wrestling Equivalent: Steve Austin vs. The Rock, WrestleMania X-7

Most people figured this would have been LAST year's national championship had it not been for extenuating circumstances. (Oklahoma's meltdown against Kansas State didn't help either, but I digress.) This year, the two teams started the season ranked first and second, respectively, and neither one has moved since. They each won 12 games over impressive competition -- USC beat Cal, Virginia Teach, and Arizona State, while Oklahoma beat Texas, Texas Tech, and Texas A&M. Four of the five finalists for the Heisman Trophy -- whose recipient is generally considered the best college football player of the year -- are from these schools (two each). Both schools have very good traditions, with multiple national titles in the past -- including two of the last 5. All signs point to this being the Game of the Year.

There you go, my look at how the college bowl games match up as a wrestling supercard. Just something for discussion.

[Guest American Idiot]

Very good. How would you compare Miami to Triple H. Miami has never held any other team down. Infact If I had to compare Miami to anybody it would have to be Chris Benoit.

[Farmer Reil]

Why are there so many damn Bowls in American Football?

I'm guessing a bowl is like a trophy type thing, right?

Why can't they just say "Ha, you lost, you suck" and have done with it?

[sahyder1]

Why are there so many damn Bowls in American Football?

I'm guessing a bowl is like a trophy type thing, right?

Why can't they just say "Ha, you lost, you suck" and have done with it?

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[LygerMark]

In College Football, you must win 6 games to qualify for a bowl. The games are basically used as a way for seniors to get 1 last hurrah and bring revenue into the schools to keep the program going (the College doesn't pay for it period. All football related stuff is paid for by winnings, gate money, ect.).

[sahyder1]

In College Football, you must win 6 games to qualify for a bowl.  The games are basically used as a way for seniors to get 1 last hurrah and bring revenue into the schools to keep the program going (the College doesn't pay for it period.  All football related stuff is paid for by winnings, gate money, ect.).

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[existence02]

My only real problem with this is the WVU/FSU game. WVU also had Orange Bowl dreams this season, and had Kay-Jay Harris remained healthy and VaTech not knocking them off it's highly possible we'd have another undeafted team in the top 5. Lee Corso along with many other critics had picked WVU as an outside shot at the National Title.

I dunno much about Auburn's fan traveling, but VaTech will sell out their tickets. Hell if I weren't moving across the state around that time and in need of cash I'd make the trip down.

Also 6 wins is all that it takes to qualify for a bowl game. The fact that you win 6 games doesn't mean that you'll get a bowl, but that's all it takes to be "bowl eligable".

[LygerMark]

Yeah thats what I meant. You must win 6 games to qualify for a bowl. Doesn't mean you will get in but it is required.

[oldskool]

IIRC Corso had penned in West Virginia in the title game at 12-0.

And considering how bad the rest of the Big East seemed to be, a win over Virginia Tech would have been enough for most everyone to give them a spot in the Orange Bowl.

The Liberty Bowl looks like one hell of a matchup, I'll be watching that one...and I hope to catch the Fiesta Bowl just to see if Utah can pull off the big "upset" and beat Pitt.

I'm hoping Alex Smith wins the Heisman, while we're on the college football topic. Would Utah be undefeated, let alone in a BCS bowl without him?

One could argue that Oklahoma and USC were powerful enough to make the title game undefeated without one of their two candidates (White/Peterson or Leinart/Bush) but there's no way Utah is in the spot they're in without Alex Smith.

[The Third Dukes]

Very good. How would you compare Miami to Triple H. Miami has never held any other team down. Infact If I had to compare Miami to anybody it would have to be Chris Benoit.

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