The Underground

[Guest The Blueprint]

Sorry for another delay, work is getting in the way, show should be up tomorrow.

Anyone got anything to say?

[NobBe Nobbs]

I can't say I've ever been a fan of rap in general, but the concept of the diary, not to mention the matches themselves, is excellent. Please keep it up. And push Lemar (ph34r the English).

[Guest The Blueprint]

Abit of news to tide you over until the next show (which I promise will be soon, I've been tied up with a presentation). Pretty big news though.

To keep in line with the fact that The Underground does not pre-determine the winner, the better man shall win. I have decided to no longer determine the winner of the fight as well.

Instead I will be using a small random number generating program to determine who wins the fight.

Though it wont be a straight 50/50 choice. I will weight the odds, basically out of ten. So say 50 Cent is fighting Eminem, I may weight the odds 6 to 4 in Fifty's favour. So then I would put in the numer 10 into the program, if it comes up 1 to 6 then fifty will win, if it is 7 through to 10 then Eminem will win.

But to add to the reality and avoid random shocks, I will also decide before whether it will be best of three, five or seven, again depending on the match.

And finally I promise to deliver on the outcome, otherwise there really would be no point in doing it.

Thoughts?

Edited May 25, 2005 by The Blueprint

[Guest The Blueprint]

Saturday 21st May 2005 Choose Your Path

Welcome To The Underground

It was a night of the Champions. Chingy, Kia, Usher, Jay Z & R Kelly and of course, 50 Cent walked in and out of Better Dayz as Underground Kings (and Queen). Now they face a new challenge, now they face… change.

Tonight many fighters will shape their futures as decision day dawns. We’re doing things a little different this week, for once Hector didn’t pin the match list to the notice board, on this night, Dr. Dre was in control.

But it is with our Champion that we start, strutting towards the ring without a care in the world, a smug expression plastered across his face. The weight had finally been lifted, he had shrugged off Eminem and stood tall at the top.

Time To Even Up The Scales

He introduced The Game, the bad guy in all this. Fifty did what he had to do to win the title, for The Game though, this was all about climbing the ladder to the top, last week he stepped on Eminem, the first rung. Now 50 Cent is at the top offering his hand to The Game, he had proved his worth to G Unit. He was in.

Cue Dr Dre’s entrance. He didn’t want a big show of all this, 50 had out foxed him, now Dre wanted control again.

Nights like these require direction and decisiveness from the top, traits Dre is never short of. He had some bombshells to drop, starting with the four men standing diagonally opposite him.

Pay Attention, This Is Important

Seriously, don’t go skimming this bit. Starting at the top…

I’m gonna try and keep this short so you take it all in. OK, Ludacris had earned the ‘right To Fight’ with a crushing victory over Ice Cube just seven days ago. Now common sense tells you that if Eminem can’t beat 50 Cent, Ludacris doesn’t stand much of a chance right?. Of course we could all pretend that there was light at the end of the tunnel, we could all pretend that Fifty’s reign was under serious threat, but the reality of the situation was different, very different. But Dre had a plan…

The upcoming end of month show has been named ‘Beg For Mercy’ for a very good reason, you may or may not know of the G Unit album of the same name. Five fights, four G Unit members, three titles. Make a night out of that…

First you hand title fights to all G Unit members then mix in the State Champion and the Tag Team Champions, add extra helpings of 50 Cent, toss in two unknown ingredients and garnish with Ludacris. Understand? First one to figure out the card gets a prize.

Tonight though, was not all about G Unit. On this one occasion, 50 Cent was not gonna be the centre of attention. Tonight he had the night off, go put your feet up son, you aint needed right now.

There’s More To The Underground Than G Unit

With stage cleared, Dr Dre was about to set a few more things straight, starting with The Tag Team Champions. Even the less attentive of you will have noticed that Jay Z and R Kelly have been having a few problems in the last few weeks, well months, and the relationship may have been strained to the point of return. Dre has an answer for everything though, so we can look forward to R Kelly Vs. Memphis Bleek for the Tag Team Championship!

Next on the agenda was The Regulators, Nate Dogg and Warren G. Dre offered them a way forward after another disappointing failure, tonight one of them will have the chance to earn a ‘Right To Fight’ match for the State Championship, only one of them though, who fights is up to them! Their opponent in that match, will be Ice Cube, given one last chance to breathe life into his dwindling career, should he lose….he’s out.

Now onto Ciara and last week’s havoc. Dre doesn’t care for Bullshit, he tells it like it is, and the way it is here is that Ciara is coming. To The Underground? Yes. Watch this space…

And finally… next month sees the start of ‘The Underground Fighting Championship 2005’. The biggest month of the year. Eight men, seven fights, one winner. Winner takes all, the money, the honour, the respect, the trophy and most importantly, an Underground Title fight. With places limited, fighters must start to step their game up, Dre calls the shots, he’s the man to impress. The qualifiers start next week. Don’t screw it up.

Got all that?

Hector….

Hector could finally pin the match list to the board. The matches spread back through the crowd…we knew of R Kelly Vs. Memphis Bleek…we knew of Warren G or Nate Dogg Vs. Ice Cube…we didn’t know of Obie Trice Vs.J’Kwon and Slow Jamz Vs. Ruff Ryders.

Lets Get This Started

Right, now we can get on with the fighting. Lead Legs, get your brain in gear, punters get your bets on, Neptune, get your tunes set and to my faithful readers, sorry about the slow start, but we’re moving now. Underground Style!

Lets Go!

J’Kwon Vs. Obie Trice

Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrbody in The Club Getting’ Tipsy

J’Kwon exploded out onto the entrance and hopped his way down to the ring, full of energy, full of fight. Last month was a bad for JK, any month that ends without a title fight can be considered so, but he’s here to make emends, and entertain us, like only he can, in the process.

And a warm welcome back to Obie Trice! Nine weeks ago OT was beaten in a ‘Right To Fight’ match, but he lost more than his shot at the title, he lost two months of competition, injuries are not as common place in The Underground as you might think, but these things happen. Who cares though? Obie’s Back!

Ring that damn bell, we’re ready to fight.

So was Obie, so was J’Kwon. Both men sprung out of the starter blocks, neck and neck into turn one. You could see two months of anger slowly being unleashed by Obie Trice, you take the man out of the Underground, but you don’t take….you know the rest.

Sometimes it’s damn hard to keep up with these matches, the pace, the vitality, the dynamism of these fights is unreal at times. I’ll try though! J’Kwon pulled of the first big hit of the match, the crowd drew a collective breath as he buried his right foot into the mid-drift of his opponent, then landed and swung his left foot into the side of Obie’s head. It was becoming clear that Obie Trice was lacking the fitness to compete at his usual high standards. But it’s not a title fight and it’s not a ‘Right To Fight’ match, so no big deal yeah? No, every match is ‘a big deal’, because above all else, Dre is fair, he rewards winners and tends to ignore losers. You win these fights and you may just find yourself in a title fight sometime soon.

JK had the advantage at half time.

Imagine this, you’re in a fight, you think you have the upper hand and you’re starting to think about finishing it. Slowly your confidence is rising, you start to take your foot off the pedal and suddenly confidence becomes cockiness. You see a group of girls watching and can’t resist the temptation to show off, You turn around…

WHAM!

You’re punched in the jaw, again, again, again, you put your hands up and stagger back, you feel a knee being pushed into your stomach. The girls are laughing at you now. Next thing you know you’ve been tossed across the field (ring) and into a tree (turnbuckle or whatever you wanna call it). You’re wishing you were somewhere else, far far away, but then reality smacks you in the face. No escape. What we have here ladies and gentlemen is an Obie Trice comeback. Full of the vigour and passion we have come to expect.

Nine weeks ago Fabolous countered ‘The Setup’. In my view at least, this is easily the most spectacular ‘move’ in The Underground. Obie runs from behind his opponent, grabs their head and drags them forward before leaping over the top rope, forcing their neck down on the rope and landing on his feet. Nine times out of ten he lands it perfect, but Fabolous was the exception as he wriggled free and helped launch Obie over the rope and onto the concrete floor below. Painful to say the least.

Tonight was not to be another exception, tonight was Obie’s night, Obie’s fight, Obie’s return!

We’re already playing catch-up, so make this a short one Neptune. Luckily the weight of the money was on J’Kwon, few foresaw the impact of Obie’s return. You can’t always be right though.

Slow Jamz Vs. Ruff Ryders

She may be asking for some Marvin Gaye and Luther Van Dross in the song, but tonight she’s getting Kanye West and Twista, who together make up the impressive Slow Jamz tandom. There’s a certain aura about this duo. As the title suggests, Slow Jamz is not the most upbeat song going and so makes for a very slow, deliberate entrance. Always relaxed, always ready, always smiling, they are perhaps, the most likeable pair in The Underground, the exact opposite of their opponents.

Ruff Ryders was blasted out over the sound system as DMX and Jadakiss paced down towards the ring. No time to enjoy the moment, they came to fight, nothing else. It is apparent that DMX wears the trousers in this partnership and sets a very dark, angry tone. Jada and Twista kicked off.

Whilst the match warms up, I’m gonna introduce you to Slow Jamz. I’ve always been very curious about this team, their attitude is not typical of The Underground, you get the distinct feeling that they aren’t here to prove themselves or to win titles, they are every much part of the fabric, but seemingly like to remain in the background. Kanye West, as part of the R.O.C, has long reaching influence in these quarters, and with Twista by his side, it takes a lot to ruffle his feathers. Whilst R.O.C members Jay Z and Memphis Bleek, aided and some times hindered by R Kelly, look after the groups interests, Kanye, talented though he undoubtedly is, is happy to enjoy the ride and live off his respect. But with the Tag Team Champions in turmoil, they may be about to take control of the situation themselves.

Have I spoilt the fight now? Two paragraphs says Slow Jamz are gonna win right? Maybe, but with the super-aggressive DMX pounding away at Twista, anything can certainly happen.

A right hook sent Twista crashing to the ground, but to the anguish of DMX, straight towards Kanye West, who reached in, tagged himself into the match and was straight into the face of DMX. Kanye, the fresher man, was going to town on DMX, even allowing him to tag in Jadakiss. When Kanye is in the mood, he’s a hell of a fighter. The Ruff Ryders were on the retreat.

There is always a certain amount of randomness to tag team matches. They never flow, never follow any pattern, you just have to be in the right place at the right time to get the win. You can have your opponent beat, but the match is not yet won. So when DMX caught Kanye West with the ‘X Gon’ Give It To Ya’ out of absolutely no where, his eyes began to widen. Twista saved the day, dashing in and kicking DMX in the gut before hitting him the ‘Overnight Celebrity’. DMX was beat, Twista went for the glory, but as I just said, it’s not over til its over.

Jadakiss lunged at Twista and hammered him down with a brutal right hook. He scooped him up and planted the ‘Kiss Of Death’. Good night Twista, this one’s done. Jadakiss took the three count, how about that for an upset, after talking up Slow Jamz, look what happens.

So Ruff Ryders won right? Not if you understood what I just said they didn’t. You disarm one member, and then the other picks up a Rocket Blaster and fires it at you. Or… you take down Twista and Kanye West hauls himself up, spins Jada around and unloads on him with his ‘College Dropout’.

So Slow Jamz won? Yes, of course they did, I gave away the outcome six paragraphs ago. And now your all very confused right?

Few would have backed against a Slow Jamz defeat, so whilst the crowd counted their winnings, Neptune kept the mood up with ‘Hate It Or Love It’ by our good friends at G Unit.

With all the duties complete we can proceed on to the next match as Ice Cube fights for his Underground career against either Nate Dogg or Warren G. But which one will get the chance to earn the ‘Right To Fight’ for the State Championship? Your guess is literally, as good as mine.

Ice Cube Vs. Nate Dogg Or Warren G

Ice Cube made his entrance first, backed by the familiar chimes of ‘You Can Do It’, this may be one last hurrah for the Cube. He looked unfazed by the occasion though, this was just another fight.

Now which one….

‘Nobody…….. Does It Better……’ than Nate Dogg! I’m not all that surprised to be honest, the reality is that he is the better fighter, but it can’t have been easy for Warren G to take. So Nate Dogg gets the opportunity, but you can’t help that feel Warren G’s shot won’t be too far along, maybe he’ll get it once Nate Dogg wins the title? There’s a thought for you Nate…

Were off and running, the two men sway back and forth awaiting an opening, there it was, Nate Dogg was in. Like a panther, he pounced on Ice Cube and beat him into the corner, resisting the temptation to let up in his attack.

Together The Regulators were one big disappointement, though individually, they can go far, especially this Nate Dogg fella, a real tough cookie to crack, maybe, just maybe, Warren G was holding him back, just a little.

Someone should remind Ice Cube just what is at stake for him here. Life in The Undergound, bruising though it may be, is pretty damn sweet. You’re part of an exclusive club, many, many men will envy you, everyone will respect you. Get your mind right Cube.

Yeah, that’s it! Ice Cube came roaring back with a mishmash of rights and lefts, he had a vision in his head, spurring him on. No one wants to see Ice Cube fade away, after last weeks beating, he had a point to prove, surely he’d want to leave when he’s good and ready, not be forced out by an underachieving tag team fighter.

In The Underground though, you don’t always get a choice, and when you’re hit square with a ‘G Funk’, the choice goes right out of the window. But then, there’s always light at the end of the tunnel.

The Underground watched in a confused state of amazement as a thoughtful Nate Dogg circled the ring, not even going for the win, instead he motioned Warren G into the ring and the pair proceeded to discuss something. The weather? Tomorrows TV? What they had for dinner? Who know’s, but Nate Dogg was not interested in the fight.

‘I quit’.

Nate Dogg quits….what the hell is that all about?

You don’t quit, unless… Nate Dogg has a plan, yes…Nate Dogg has a plan!

So, I assume that means Ice Cube won then, so he stays. We’ll let Dre sort that one out.

The Underground Fighting Championships 2005

Whilst we wait for the next match, allow me to explain in a little more detail, the upcoming Underground Fighting Championships. Eight fighters will eventually qualify for the Tournament, though all Champions, including 50 Cent, are barred from entering. Of the eight fighters left, three of them will earn the right to call out an opponent to fight them. Next week there will be three qualifiers, the following week there will be another three and the final two entrants will de decided by Dre, though the pair will not be able to compete for the right to choose their opponent.

The week after ‘Beg For Mercy’ will see the six qualifiers compete in a six-man elimination match, the first man to get a pin will have first choice and so on for the second and third. Though the man who picks third will setup two fights, calling one man out for his fight and leaving two left to duke it out for the remaining semi final place.

Then at ‘The Underground Fighting Championships 2005’ show, the Semi Finals and then the Final will take place and someone will walk away with a blinged out trophy and a the ‘Right To Fight’ The Underground Champion.

Once you have digested all that information, we will continue on with the nights main event, R Kelly defending his half of the Tag Team Championship against Memphis Bleek.

Memphis Bleek Vs. R Kelly For The Tag Team Championships

So here we go, R Kelly wins then Jigga & Kells stay as the champs, should Mem’ Bleek triumph, he and Jay Z will be the new tag champs. It really is that simple, so with the rocket science done, lets bring out the fighters.

Mem’ Bleek was out first, his entrance takes so damn long. ‘Too be a member of Rocafella, you you have to be 100% from the streets…’ and so it goes on, a script based on the scene from Goodfellas. The music eventually kicks in and Bleek struts his way down to the ring, he is a very confident young man, you can attribute that directly to his membership of the R.O.C.

R Kelly was in a more sombre mood though, despite his upbeat tune ‘Ignition’ setting an upbeat tone, he had not come to fight tonight, he wasn’t expecting this. Still, life goes on, but what remains in question is his motivation for this fight, does he really want to continue the strained partnership with Jay Z? Of course he does, he’s a champion and he’s grown used to it.

Bleek started out with bags of energy and desire, laying into R Kelly, who for the time being, seemed content to defend his corner, weathering the storm, soaking up the pressure. On paper Memphis doesn’t stand much of a chance. R Kelly has been doing what he does best for the last few months, winning. Experienced, savaay and well-balanced in the ring, though he doesn’t always mirror those qualities outside of the battlefield.

So what is the mindset of Jay Z? No one has bothered to ask, so we can only guess. I’d take an educated guess that he wants R Kelly to win this fight. What the R.O.C really crave is exposure, which is bred by success/ They want to be the biggest group around, they wanted to be the most successful and the most respected. After endless title defences, at times without even breaking sweat, Jay Z knows R Kelly is his equal and so they form a formidable team. They don’t always see eye-to-eye, but they must be doing something right, no one can beat them.

He may be getting his wish, if that is indeed his desired outcome because R Kelly had stepped his game up, crushing Mem’ Bleeks spirit with an awesome array of jabs, hooks and uppercuts. The ‘Ignition’ may have been the final nail in the coffin, but this was not just about victory for R Kelly, this was about him. He stuck two fingers up to the R.O.C when he rejected the opportunity to pin his opponent, even allowing him to produce a little offence now and again, but he was in control, and starting to enjoy himself. That’s a dangerous zone to be in.

Right now R Kelly had almost tip-toed his way through the minefield. With only a few steps to go he had the end in his sights, but he was enjoying the spotlight and allowed it to get to him, dancing around the mines and then BOOM! The mine exploded.

R Kelly was a half second away from the win, the refs hand was half a foot away from the mat… and then time seemed to freeze. The ref stopped, for seconds nothing happened, then R Kelly came to a realistation, a nasty, all to familiar one. Think back to Better Dayz and remember how I told you Pharrel Williams lost the Lightweight Title. The R.O.C took it off him, tonight R Kelly was about to mugged.

Jay Z swaggered out and down the entrance ramps, Bennie Segal followed him out, Slow Jamz were not too far behind. The wolves had been released and R Kelly was for dinner.

The ref stepped out of the ring, walked half way up the ramp and turned his back to the action. Out of sight out of mind right? It’s not cheating if you don’t see it. What he missed was a five versus one. R Kelly was being robbed of his respect, his dignity, his pride, his place in the R.O.C and he was being robbed of his Cross Of Honour. Non one came to his rescue, it was almost sad.

Memphis Bleek hammered him with the ‘M.A.D.E’ as the rest of the group dropped out of the ring. The ref rushed back and made the count as Bleek covered R Kelly. New Champions, new order, new R.O.C. Sorry R Kelly, you’re just no longer needed. Just like Pharrell…

[Guest The Blueprint]

The upcoming end of month show has been named ‘Beg For Mercy’ for a very good reason, you may or may not know of the G Unit album of the same name. Five fights, four G Unit members, three titles. Make a night out of that…

First you hand title fights to all G Unit members then mix in the State Champion and the Tag Team Champions, add extra helpings of 50 Cent, toss in two unknown ingredients and garnish with Ludacris. Understand? First one to figure out the card gets a prize.

[Guest The Blueprint]

The Underground Saturday 4th June 2005

Preview

The Underground is getting set for the Underground Fighting Championship 2005, the competition is going to be fierce to say the very least, with a shot at The Underground title up for grabs, it's gonna be worth fighting for. Qualifiers start this week.

Seven days back Jay Z led the assult as the R.O.C dispatched R Kelly from their group, taking his title off of him before booting him out of the door. Jigga will now be partnered by Memphis Bleek, a first-time Champion as they build up to 'Beg For Mercy'. Surely though, R Kelly won't take the humiliation lightly.

Obie Trice will again be in action as he takes on the man who put him out of action for two months, Fabolous and Ciara makes her Underground deubt against Kelis.

I know you're not stupid enough to miss this one.

[TGC]

Bonsie'd!