MDP

I want Kobe to get a ring, but I want KG and company to have one too. I think it will be the Celtics in 7. I don't see them winning all three games at home and then more than one on the road.

I'm an inny.

You've seen it?

Lesnar is just as big as Kimbo, he could take him down and Kimbo would be like a fish out of water if he was on his back.

All I have to do is look across my hall to my older brother's former room where he has enshrined an entire wall of MMPR stuff.

Clobbered wasn't the right word, I was exaggerating.

I just meant that when it came to actual MMA, he got beat easily.

In the preshow Tank said he isn't what he used to be. But he still benches 600 pounds..so I don't care if your in shape or not..you have to be packing some fucking power to bench 600.

Bleh, not really. Tank was never really a good fighter at all. I'll take Kimbo more seriously when he faces someone credible.

Silva has some satellite dish ears.

Nice commentary by Goldberg. "When it comes to the ground, Ricco is at the top...top....top whatever when he's in shape."

EDIT: I can't wait for this, I hope they knock the fuck out of each other.

The main event didn't happen yet, I think he was talking about the second fight. There's one more fight then Kimbo vs. Abbott.

I wasn't being an ass about it, I was just explaining it.

EDIT: This announcer is annoying. Not Stephen (?) but Ronaldo (?).

It's not "free", you can only see it on Showtime. Which you pay for monthly.

Yeah, the American ones have alot more drama, mostly because we're fucking crazy.

Cheating is cheating. Just because it doesn't benefit you doesn't mean it's ok. If you take steroids and you still suck, does that mean it's ok?

I think he's in Washington now.

I doubt this is really going to affect anything teams do. With so many people on the list, I think owners are just going to worry about whether or not they can play for them this year or not. I really don't think this is going to affect the league like most people think.

Seriously if Three Days Grace and Papa Roach arent in the top 5 you all suck

I'm definitely not on the Blink 182 wagon, I can't stand them.

Nirvana was arguably the best grunge band ever and really influenced alot of punk music so they deserve to be right there.

GNR and Queen are two of the most rescognizable bands in the world so just for sheer name value they are in a good place. Who doesn't love "We Will Rock You"?

What do those words mean?

Puke is a fucking awful name :/

In fact, most metal band names are pretty shitty. Other than Iron Maiden.

Why though? What is so bad about Puke?

What is the problem with Puke? It's just a four letter word for a band name. Would you all hate Vomit, Barf, Regurgitation, Upchuck or Yak? I love it.

I'm trying to figure out the anti-Puke sentiment. Like I said, it's a straight forward name, no bullshit, just Puke. We are Puke. We rock, that is all.

And I think Summers might disagree with me.

Vince McMahon is a genius, that's why.

I hate country, hip-hop, rap, emo/punk music.

I like raunchy, hard metal. But not that screaming thrash shit. Stuff like Godsmack, System of a Down, Disturbed, etc.

My dad plays bass in a bar band that plays late 80s early 90s rock.

I'm in, as long as Harry Potter is never mentioned .

Pyro rains from the top of the stage area onto the rampway on both sides of the arena and the camera switches to the broadcast team

Mike Tenay: Hello and welcome folks to TNA iMPACT! Live from Orlando Studio 21, we're here at the TNA Asylum and boy do we have a show for you.

Don West: Oh yeah Mike, tonight is the night that TNA takes another step forward in wrestling. A huge announcement is scheduled for tonight, and wow do I wish I knew what it was.

Mike Tenay: Don I am just as lost as you. I'm sure though that within the next hour we're have all the details! But before we get started on that huge announcement, we've got a ton of action for you! The X-Division champion is in action for the first time on impact in a long while.

Don West: Well Mike, this is going to be very interesting as he faces off against his former teammate in Triple X, Elix Skipper.

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-Christopher Daniels vs. Elix Skipper-

Skipper comes out and receives modest cheers from the crowd as they don't seem to into him. Daniels gets a round of boos as he poses with the X Division title at the top of the heel rampway. He climbs into the ring and climbs the ropes with the belt. The bell rings and they circle each other until they finally lock up. Skipper shoots on a leg and gets it in the air and has Daniels hopping on one foot. Chris tries an enziguri and Skipper ducks. He catches Daniels' other foot, then Daniels uses his leg power to roll Skipper over himself, but Skipper tucks into a somersault and jumps back up. Primetime jumps off the middle rope and backflips behind Daniels who is on one knee. He grabs his head and throws it down onto the mat.

Daniels regains control after Skipper botches a dive off the top rope onto the floor, landing on the guardrail. Daniels picks him up and hooks his arm over his neck and his leg in his oter arm. He picks him up over his head with the fisherman suplex and has the pin. 1...2..kckout by Skipper. Skipper fights back to his feet and then kicks Daniels in the side of the head. Elix climbs the top rope and lands a splash! 1..2..kickout! Skipper looks up in disbelief and starts pounding Daniels into the mat with fists to the face. Daniels takes it and starts getting up. Skipper misses a kick to the leg and then misses a roundhouse. Daniels grabs Skipper from behind and lands a lowblow where the from the refs position wasn't visible! He drags Skipper to the middle of the ring, and then climbs to the top. Daniels signals the BME and lands it! 1..2..3!

Winner: Christopher Daniels

Mike Tenay: That sonofabitch cheats to win again!

Don West: That's the thing though Mike. That's what makes Christopher Daniels the greatest X Division champion ever. He does whatever it takes, to get the job done!

Mike Tenay: Oh now what in the hell? What's Petey Williams doing?!

Petey Williams has walked down the ramp and has Daniel's belt in hand. Daniels is still in the ring and he's pointing at Petey, telling him not to touch it. Williams wags a finger at him and then walks backwards down the rampway from which he came. Daniels climbs out of the ring and starts chasing him, and Williams breaks into a full sprint to the back. A camera follows them and Daniels is seen choosing between two different hallways. He follows one and finds a door that reads 'Team Canada'.

Christopher Daniels: Open up Petey I know you're there!

Obviously someone behind the door is trying to disguise their voice.

???: Umm..uh..Petey isn't here right now. I think he left the arena.

Christopher Daniels: Open the damn door!

Daniels tries ramming it a few times before he realizes he's not budging through.

Christopher Daniels: You gotta come out sometime.

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Choosing An Enemy

James Mitchell and Abyss are backstage with Jeremy Borash.

Jeremy Borash: James Mitchell, Abyss. Tonight, apparently you have the power to choose Monty Brown's opponent tonight. And next week, he gets to choose Abyss's opponent. So have you come to a decision yet?

James Mitchell: Have we come to a decision? Oh yeah. We've come to a decision. You see Monty Brown. There's a reason Abyss wanted you in a barbed wire match. It's so he can punish you to all ends. Monty, Abyss is going to send you straight to hell and back in that match. And in doing so, he becomes the NWA World Heavyweight Champion. And to soften you up Monty, your opponent tonight is a well known enemy of Abyss's. A man who goes to no end, to see his competitors destruction. His name is...Raven! Trust me when I say this Monty Brown, you've got a nightmare on your hands!

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-Chris Sabin & Leonardo Kendrick vs. Team Canada (Eric Young & Bobby Roode)-

Team Canada comes out first with D'Amore in tow as always. Kendrick comes out first and storms the ring quickly. He goes right after Roode with a forearm and then hits EY with one. Roode clubs him in the back though and EY knees him in the stomach. Sabin's music hits and he comes charging out and gets leveled by a clothesline from Roode. Rudy Charles desperatly tries to restore order by pushing EY towards the ropes. Kendrick follows suit and steps to his own corner while Roode has Sabin backed into a corner and his palm driving his face upwards. Charles calls for a break and Roode regretfully does. Sabin kicks him in the thigh, and then another. Roode starts stepping back and Sabin grabs him and swings him around in a tornado DDT.

Kendrick and EY are both down on the mat after a double clothesline. Kendrick going for a tag after being isolated for what seems like hours to him. EY tags Bobby Roode in and Kendrick gets the hot tag to Sabin. Sabin clotheslines Roode and then dropkicks EY in the face. Roode misses a clothesline and Sabin drop toe holds him. EY stomps on his back and lifts him up and then drops him down in a suplex. Sabin grabs EY and hits the Cradle Shock! EY isn't legal man, but Charles doesn't let that bother him and starts counting! Roode goes to break it up but Kendrick comes out of no where with a flying heel kick that knocks him out fo the ring, on top of D'Amore! 1..2..3!

Winners: Chris Sabin & Leonardo Kendrick

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Arrival

Jeff Jarrett is seen being wheeled into the arena by a TNA staff member with a neckbrace on and a cast on his arm.

Jeff Jarrett: Woah woah. Stop here, I wanna talk for a second. Raven, you're going to regret ever puttin' me in the hospital. I'm going to make damn sure you won't come back from where I was this time.

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-Ron Killings vs. Samoa Joe-

Joe comes down to the ring first to his usual cheers and the crowd starts another "Joe" chant. Killings comes down to the ring with Konnan beside him. Joe paces back and forth and Killings slides into the ring as Konnan stands outside. The bell rings and Killings circles Joe who just stands there, turning around, following Killings. Joe takes a step forward and Killings flinches. Samoa Joe gets a big smile on his face and so does Killings. Joe grabs him by the head and they lock up. Joe scores a knee to the stomach and Killings holds his stomach. Joe responds by kicking him in the face, and then drives him to the mat with an STO. Joe falls on top of him and hooks the leg. 1..2..kickout. Joe picks Killings up by his hair and then drags him into the corner. He takes is foot and puts it to Killings' face and starts driving it across the bridge of his nose several times. Joe backs off a little bit and then circles around the ring and runs at Killings, driving the leg into his face one more time.

Killings gains control after Samoa Joe misses a running enziguri in the corner and gets hung up on the ropes. Killings grabs Joe's leg on the inside of the ring and pulls down hard, causing him to crash onto the mat on his head. Killings grabs Joe's leg and then the James' start walking down to the ring. Killings watches them walk down and Konnan gets in front of them. The James' point behind Killings and he turns around, Joe nails him with a quick belly-to-belly suplex. Konnan punches BG right in the face and it knocks him down. Billy and Konnan start brawling outside as Joe gets Killings on the top rope and nails the Muscle Buster! 1...2...3!

Winner: Samoa Joe

Joe slowly makes his way back to the back as BG got back up and nailed Konnan in the back. They throw Konnan into the ring and Billy hits the Fameasser on him. BG tosses him out of the ring and they focus on a lifeless Ron Killings. Billy goes outside of the ring and grabs a chair as BG James mounts Killings and drives his fist into his forehead. He picks him up and holds him by his arms and Billy holds the chair up to the crowd and they boo loudly. Billy positions the chair and thrusts it into Killings midsection.

Mike Tenay: My god, someone stop this. Don't do it Billy! Don't do it! C'mon!

Don West: I can tell you now, these guys aren't going to stop until someone gets hurt badly.

Billy pulls the chair over his head and then drives it deep into the face of Ron Killings. Blood begins to drip from a cut on Killings' forehead and then Konnan climbs back onto the apron. BG points him out and Billy nails him with a chair shot to the face, sending him down onto the floor. Billy and BG stand over top of a motionless Killings and raise each other's arms.

Mike Tenay: We need some help out here Don! Somebody get some help!

===========

Revenge Could Be Sweet

The camera cuts backstage to AMW backstage with their belts over their shoulders in street clothes talking to a few random girls.

Out of nowhere, Andy Douglas nails James Storm with a lcothesline. He turns around and starts pounding on Chris Harris, but Harris grabs Douglas by the throat and throws him into the wall. Storm is back up and he starts kicking him in the stomach. Storm bangs his head off the wall and then throws him to Harris. Chris grabs Douglas and powerbombs him through a nearby table! AMW walk off fired up and Chase stevens runs in and attends to an injured Douglas.

===========

Adding A Man?

The camera switches again to Daniels still standing outside the door, trying to barge it open. Elix Skipper walks past and stops next to Daniels.

Elix Skipper: You need some help man?

Christopher Daniels: I don't need anyone's help.

Daniels again rams the door and it doesn't budge.

Elix Skipper: Listen, we can open this thing together, but you need to do something for me.

Christopher Daniels: Oh really? What's that?

Elix Skipper: Give me the first shot at your title, after Sacrifice.

Christopher Daniels: I'll do you one better, you help me open this door, and I'll let you get your shot, at Sacrifice.

Skipper looks at Daniels and they simultaneously kick in the door. Daniels storms in and finds a wide open window.

Christopher Daniels: DAMNIT!

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Mike Tenay: Don, what a night it's been so far! We've had beatings galore, and a title stolen!

Don West: Well we're nearing the end of the night here and we've only got one more match. But where is that big announcement going to fit in?

Mike Tenay: That's right, in a stipulation, Abyss and Monty Brown will choose each other's opponents this week, and next week. Be careful of who you choose, you really want to soften up your opponent before...

Tenay is cut off by Larry Zybysko's music and entrance into the ring.

Larry Zybysko: Excuse me everyone, I am here to offer up the major announcement that's been talked about all week. TNA has been on a growing trail for over 3 years now, and tonight, TNA takes another step in the right direction. Starting August 13th, TNA makes its national television debut, on SpikeTv at 11 o'clok eastern!!!

The crowd lets out an enormous cheer and several TNA faces are shown backstage cheering and clapping.

Larry Zybysko: Now let's all enjoy an amazing TNA match, before TNA returns to television in just two short weeks!

Mike Tenay: What?! TNA is moving to SpikeTv!

Don West: That is absolutely huge! I cannot believe TNA has made it this far!

Mike Tenay: Well it sure is amazing how far we've come from those days in Tennessee, but we've got more work here, Monty Brown, the NWA World Heavyweight Champion is taking on Raven!

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-Monty Brown vs. Raven-

Raven's music hits and the crowd jumps to their feet for this huge main event. He climbs in the ring and sits down in one of the corners. Monty Brown then steps out of the tunnel and holds his belt high above his head and pyro goes off behind him. Brown marches down to the ring and points to his belt and Raven gets up. Brown gets in the ring and they go right after each other. Raven gains the advantage and bounces Brown off the ropes. Monty comes back and misses a clothesline, then Raven nails him with a flying elbow. Monty sists up from the impact and then Raven baseball slides into his face. Raven follows up by stomping Brown in the back. Brown gets to his knees and Raven field goal kicks him in the ribcage. Raven drops a big elbow to the sternum of Brown and covers. 1..kickout. Raven kicks him again, but Monty Brown catches his foot and stands up. He smiles and then levels Raven with a clothesline.

Brown continues to set the tempo as he hits a huge powerslam, and he follows up with a cover. 1..2..kickout. Brown sits up and lands two punches to Raven's face before picking him up and whipping him into the corner. Brown charges him and clotheslines him into the corner. He then grabs a rope on each side of Raven and drives his shoulder into his stomach several times. Raven starts fighting back with a right that staggers Brown back. Monty fires his own right and Raven sways. Raven then finds a second wind and lands three left jabs to his face, and the whirls around and clotheslines Brown. Raven picks Monty brown up and signals for the Raven Effect DDT, but Jeff Jarrett starts wheeling himself down the ramp and Raven stops, throwing Brown to the ground. He climbs out of the ring and gets in Jarrett's face, and then Jarrett kicks him between the legs! Jarrett then gets up and tears his neckbrace off and then starts kicking Raven in the back. The ref calls for the bell and awards Raven the match upon DQ

Winner by DQ: Raven

Monty Brown makes his way to the outside where he also starts stomping on Raven. Jarrett picks him up and throws him straight into a Pounce from Monty Brown! Abyss then comes running down the ramp and elbows Monty Brown in the face. Jarrett hits him in the back with a chair, but he just turns around and then Black Hole Slams him outside the ring and Abyss stands proudly over everyone!

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This is bullshit. These people are crazy to buy this piece of shit. I'm not getting this lump of crap until at least 2008. People getting killed over this thing? Why? Why wait there when you can go two weeks later, and get one? It's the same price, and the same shitty launch titles are out.