MDP

End Of August

I'm now in the hole $14,300. I wonder if I'll make it. I'm at 15% PI. Mr. Simon starts working for IWA-EC. No clue where that is...but he better not miss any of my shows. Here are the new overness updates.

Workers

Chuckles: 17

Jack Smack: 30

Mr. Simon: 51

Shawn Stylez: 21

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli: 39

The Warlock: 17

X-Calibur: 29

Injury Prone

SOLW Heavyweight Championship CAGE Match

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli © vs. Mr. Simon

Finally Mr. Simon is back in a title match, Tony will have no where to run in this cage match.

Chuckles vs. The Warlock

The Warlock is looking for his first win against the crazy clown.

Jack Smack and Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli vs. Shawn Stylez and X-Calibur

Can The Mob try to mend things between each other in the first ever SOLW tag match?

Mr. Simon vs. The Warlock

These two have put on the best matches of SOLW in The Dames opinion, let's see a repeat performance.

Predictions are welcome and encouraged. There will be a surprise prize for the winner who is closest.

Pre-Show Notes

I have $13,640 left. I'm going into debt next month. I hope I can get up to 50% PI to get bigger sponsors by then or I'll have to fire a ton of wrestlers. I fired my referee to save some more. I fire Ms. Jade since she hasn't done anything for me lately anyway. Wish me luck.

Justice For ALL!!!

A small confrontation

Mr. Simon walks to the ring and is stopped by Jack on the way

Jack Smack: Hey boy, when you go out there, just know I'm watchin' you, and don't forget it!

Match One

Mr. Simon vs. The Warlock

Simon enters the ring and The Warlock enters after him. The Warlock starts things off and lands a kick to the leg. Simon looks unphased and drives his fist into the face of The Warlock. Simon grabs a trash can lid and drives it into The Warlock's stomach and then nails him in the head. The Warlock staggers back off the ropes and runs right into a clothesline from Simon. The Warlock looks like he's having a seizure and Simon gives him an elbow.

Simon keeps driving in the power moves until he slingshots himself at The Warlock to the outside and Warlock hits him with a chair. Warlock was in control the rest of the way until he slipped off the trash can lid and got hit the Psycho Snap into the chair!

Winner: Mr. Simon

Match Two

Shawn Stylez vs. Chuckles

Chuckles is the first out and he hides by the door waiting for Shawn. Shawn's music hits and he walks out but gets jumped by Chuckles. Chuckles hits him with a few rights and lefts and throws him to the ground. Chuckles runs after him and does a huge butt drop on Stylez. He picks him and Shawn spits out some grass on his way. He gets tossed in the ring and Chuckles comes in after him. Shawn hits a boot but Chuckles grabs it the second time and pulls, forcing Shawn to fall on his back. Chuckles holds on to the leg and flips over him for a pinfall attempt. 1,2 no.

Chuckles dominates by pulling out a lot of technical moves and hold Shawn in a Sharpshooter for a good 5 minutes before he gets to the ropes.

Shawn broke out of the Sharpshooter and writhes in pain holding his leg. Chuckles hits a leg drop on his leg and cntinues to go to work on it. He nails him with a Dragon Screw and Goes up top. Whoopie Cushion! 1,2,3!!!

Winner: Chuckles

A few words before their Grudge Match

Jack is already in the ring.

Mr. Simon looks ready for his match but he comes out with a mic.

Mr. Simon: FINALLY! I've got my chance to get back, BACK! To the main event. The MAIN EVENT! Because there's no way, NO WAY!!!! I'm going to let a BRAINLESS musclehead beat me for my shot! This is the beginning of the end, of the reign of the Mobsters!

Tony Scarcelli: Mobsters? This is my title reign. There isn't no team here. This is me, if it was a team Jack wouldn't have lost to you. But instead he...

Jack Smack: I told you, I don't need you to speak for me.

Tony Scarcelli: Jesus Christ, I'm getting really sick of you telling me that! You wanna get in my face big man? Huh?

Mr. Simon: Sorry to break up your honeymoon guys but I have to kick your boyfriends ass Tony.

Match Three Number One Contender's Match

Mr. Simon vs. Jack Smack

Simon runs down to the ring and hits Jack with a right and then Tony. He keeps hitting them both with right hand and throws Tony off the ropes and nails him with a big clothesline over the ropes. He turns around to a big headbutt from Jack, but Simon doesn't feel a thing as he's on an adrenaline rush. He gives Jack a headbutt of his own. They trade headbutts until finally Jack is busted open. Simon comes off the ropes with a flying elbow and then puts him in a Boston Crab. The big man is looking nervous and he is looking around for something to grab. Tony is still there and I (The Ref) can't see Tony pulling him to the ropes. He gets out of the hold and Simon continues to be the aggressor.

Simon controls the action throughout, despite interference from Tony the whole way. Minutes go by with Simon dominating Jack and more blood spilling over the mat.

Simon drags him up top to try for the Psycho Snap but he can't lift him that high he's too heavy. Jack lands a right and starts to fight back. Jack comes off the ropes and lands a big back elbow. He sends him off the ropes for the Mob Hit but Tony is on the apron trying to distract me. He thinks Jack is in trouble. Behind me Jack hits the finisher and covers. I'm still arguing with Tony and trying to get rid of him. I finally turn around but Jack is already off him. He starts arguing with Tony and shoves him off the apron into the excited crowd of 11!!!. He turns back around, Psycho Snap! 1..2..3! It's over! Finally the rematch Simon's been waiting for!

Winner and Number One Contender: Mr. Simon

Tony looks pissed but he has to be ready for his match and he's already in the ring waiting for X-Calibur.

Main Event

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli © vs. X-Calibur

X-Cal comes out on a special horse looking as happy as ever. Maybe he's happy that Ms. Jade ran off with Dan Duggan. Anyway X-Cal is on a quick start and lands some chops and forearms to the face and chest. X-Cal spins around for a spinning heel kick. He bounces off the ropes right into a big shoulder block from Tony. Tony picks him up and throws him off the ropes. X-Cal ducks a clothesline and then Tony leap frogs him then drops down and X-Cal jumps over him. Tony jumps up and hits him with a boot to the face.

Tony stays in control until Jack strolles down to the ring and gets Tony's attention. He then gets dominated by X-Cal and he pulls out some good high spots.

X-Cal is controlling the action here and he goes over to his horse. He puts Tony on the horse and goes back into the ring. He climbs to the top. HE JUMPS! He hits him with a flying crossbody! They both look out cold and neither are moving. I start counting to ten but going slow, hopefully they get up, these people would be pissed. By the time 9 comes X-Cal slides in and then back out. He throws Tony back in the ring and then covers. 1,2 no Tony got his foot on the ropes. Tony fights his way back and picks him up. It looks like the Mob Drop. He got it! What a turn around for the champ. 1..2..NO! Broken up by Jack. I call for the bell while Jack beats him down. I run to the outside quickly to ring the bell. Then I pick up the mic and I announce the winner. I say X-Calibur is the winner and run in to raise his arm. He thinks he won the belt but he didn't pin Tony. He grabs the belt and runs off with the belt only for his horse to collapse on him. He leaves the belt and continues to ride away. I run back inside the ring to break it up. I then run back out to ring the bell several times telling them to stop. Boy I wish this little triangle was louder.

Winner: X-Cal by Disqualification!

51% Overall

Quick Results

X-Cal d. Tony 'The Boss' by DQ. Tony retains

Mr. Simon d. Jack Smack and becomes #1 contender

Chuckles d. Shawn Stylez

Mr. Simon d. The Warlock

Mentionables

Mr. Simon becomes #1 Contender.

Overness Updates

Chuckles: 17

Jack Smack: 27

Mr. Simon: 49

Ms. Jade: 10

Shawn Stylez: 21

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli: 38

The Warlock: 14

X-Calibur: 28

I have decided to update you on my Face/Heel situation.

Face

Heel

Tweener

Workers

Chuckles

Jack Smack

Mr. Simon

Ms. Jade

Shawn Stylez

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli

The Warlock

X-Calibur

I'm now at 11% PI. Woot, woot. I have taken up a 1% advertising for $10,000.

Justice For ALL!!!

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli © vs. X-Calibur

After Ms. Jade begged me for a title shot, X-Calibur will finally get his chance to go back to the 15th century...please go, I'm running out of money.

Number One Contender's Match

Mr. Simon vs. Jack Smack

Jack promised to beat Mr. Simon last month, but can Mr. Simon move back into the title match?

Shawn Stylez vs. Chuckles

Shawn Stylez blew his shot last month, can he redeem himself against the crazy clown?

Mr. Simon vs. The Warlock

For the second time in a row, these two will go at it in a hardcore rules match.

I love this diary. Hopefully Billy Bob will become the first EGA champion.

Okay, my EWR is running really slow, so I'm almost dne replaying it, and the next show Justice For All will be up later today.

Due to unforeseen events, I have to restart my EWR game over. Something happened with my save file when I tried to bring it from one computer to another, so therefore, there will be some differences in overness and money, but I will try to keep it as close as possible.

You know if you're going to correct me everytime I post I might just....QUIT! (I have no clue what that means)

SOLW: Fight Night

Stylish Stylez Show

Shawn Stylez makes his way to the ring with a mic and looks like he's got something important on his mind.

Shawn Stylez: Hello Everyone here in Barksdale, Pennsylvania!

Foley Pop

Shawn Stylez: So the way things have been going here in SOLW for me have been good so far. Other than that little title shot that I *cough blew cough*. But tonight I have another shot at the title. A well earned one might I add. This time will be...

Chuckles: Suut up you fairy! You don't deserve a title shot! Last month was my shot and I had it. I had it in my grasp! All I had to do was nail the Whoopie Cushion and it would've been over. But instead...INSTEAD! These stupid shoes! These dumb shoes...cost me my title

Shawn Stylez: Whoa whoa whoa whoa...your title!? Excuse me this is my title shot. You have nothing to do with this. You're my tune up match this month bitch. So walk your fake clown ass in here and let's get this started.

Match One

-Shawn Stylez vs. Chuckles-

Chuckles charges down to the ring. He looks quite funny sprinting to the ring in his nose and big shoes. Shawn and Chuckles go at it trading blows. Chuckles gains the upper hand by raking his eyes. He goes off the ropes and knocks him down with a big forearm. He comes off the ropes again and drives an elbow into Shawn's sternum. Chuckles puts him in an armbar. Shawn is struggling to get out but Chuckles releases him from the hold and kicks him in the face.

Chuckles continues to dominate and covers Shawn several times. Shawn continues to perservere and keeps taking his beating but not giving up.

Chuckles goes up top for the Whoopie Cushion but Shawn moves and grabs his leg. Stylezmission! Chuckles is stuck in the Stylezmission! Chuckles is clawing for the ropes and is panicking in the ring. He can't find a way out. He taps out! Shawn Stylez wins it.

Winner: Shawn Stylez

The Mob, breaking apart?

Tony makes his way to the ring with Shawn eyeing him all the way. Tony just laughs and keeps walking.

Tony: Yeah you'll get yours later tonight don't worry about that. Anyway, 3 months it's been. Since I beat the living hell out of Mr. Simon, and became Heavyweight Champion. This belt, will never leave my side. On to my first topic though, coincedently, Mr. Simon. Now you've been screwing with my teammate, Jack Smack, for some time now. I think we need to end that. Now..hey what the hell?

Jack Smack: I don't need you to talk for me anymore! I can speak for myself. I'm not some flunky bystander. I don't do everything on your beckon and call. I'm not your bitch. Now Mr. Simon, you should've known when you started messing with me, that I was going to keep coming at you. The way I understand it, you want a title shot at 'The Boss'. So here's what's going to happen. Next month at Justice For All, it's going to be me, and you. In a number one contender's match.

Tony: Hold on, aren't you supposed to be with me? Who said anything about a title shot?

Jack: What? Don't you think I can take him? Huh? Is that what you're saying?

Tony: No, no big guy. But I thought me and you were partners, you know. Me champion, you in the background looking big.

Jack: You know what Tony, I'm tired of being in the back, it's my time now, and next month, I'm gonna make damn sure, I'm facing you for the title.

Jack throws down the mic and walks out. Tony looks worried and mad in the ring.

Match Two

-Mr. Simon vs. The Warlock-

The Warlock makes his way out but is grabbed from behind and thrown onto the grass. It's Mr. Simon who jumped him. He rubs his face in the dirt and lets him come up for air. Warlock comes up spitting dirt and Simon shoves him back down. Simon stands up and stomps him into the ground. Simon starts laughing and looks away. Warlock gets up with fire in his eyes. He screams "NO MORE" and runs at Simon. Simon side steps him lets him run into the apron. However, this doesn't discourage him and he runs at him again. This time Simon turns in time to get nailed with a spear.

For the first time in his career, Warlock is actually controlling the pace. The Warlock looks hungry and chokes him with his wand, which has finally found its way back to our SOLW ring.

Warlock takes him to the top rope and hits a huge superplex. 1,2 No. Warlock looks happy that he actually got a cover on someone. Simon hits a few rights after getting up and does a swinging neckbreaker to The Warlock. He takes him up top, Psycho Snap! 1..2..3! Easily over.

Winner: Mr. Simon

Match Three

-Jack Smack vs. X-Calibur-

X starts off quick trying to gain revenge for last month and is quickly shut down by Jack Smack. Jack hits a headbutt and a big splash. He throws him into the ropes Mob Hit. 1...2..3! What a quick match!

Winner: Jack Smack

(Boy the person who booked this match must be laaaaaazy!)

Main Event

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match

-Shawn Stylez vs. 'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli ©-

Tony and Shawn make their slow way down to the ring. Tony looks as confident as ever and so does Shawn. Shawn makes the first move with a lockup, but they break away. They walk around a little more and go for the lockup again. No one gains the advantage and they break it up again. Tony gets sick of this and lands a kick to the mid-section. He hits a few chops and then whips him into the turnbuckle. He follows it up quickly with a splash. He pummels him with rights and chops in the corner. Shawn gets mad and switches places with him. He steps back and kicks him in the face. Now he starts choking him out with his boot. He goes back to the opposite corner and gets a full head of steam into Tony. Tony falls down to a sitting position and Shawn gives him a big facewash.

Shawn and Tony continue to battle back and forth until Jack comes to ringside. After Shawn goes for a suplex and inadvertantly hits the ref with Tony's feet, Jack gets in the ring.

Jack goes after Shawn and whips him into the ropes. Mr. Simon runs in and hits Jack in the back of the head with a chair. Shawn looks happy about it, but Tony hits the Mob Drop on Mr. Simon. Tony turns around and he gets hit with the Stylizer! There's no ref anywhere. 1,2,3 counts the crowd but they aren't refs. (And good thing because I don't have the money to pay them) Shawn goes to wake the ref up and Johnny Guy finally gets up. He turns around Mob Drop! 1...2...3! The ref was there for that! The champion retains!

Winner: Tony Scarcelli

49%

Quick Results

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli d. Shawn Stylez and retains

Jack Smack d. X-Cal

Mr. Simon d. The Warlock

Shawn Stylez d. Chuckles

That was good. He failed maths class. Lol. Keep it up can't wait for Billy Bob vs. The French Waiter Jean Dufour.

Beginning of July

As SOLW plods along on a bankrupt cause with people screaming for more money, and me not having the money to give. Titlehistories.com don't want anything to do with us anymore. But I tell them I have fine print in out contract where they have to renew it with us. Good thing they don't double check things because lyiing is bad children...don't do it. Scotty 2 Hotty is getting released from his contract. I told Sophie to call him and tell him we're interested. We can only pay him about $10,000 a month she told him. He hung up. The next day I received a dead fish with its guts hanging out in my mailbox. Thank you Scotty. NWA: GCW goes down. Ahh the feeling of knowing you're moving up. PWU also goes down. I play "Another One Bites The Dust" on my stereo while I read this news. Warlock turned 23. We are at 6% PI and I have $41,250 in the bank left. Gives me about two more shows until I'm in debt. I have to hold off on new character Paul Burchill as I'll go under after my next show if I have him. In an effort to save some money, Phatdrew has been FIRED!! Hopefully his departure can keep my head above water just long enough to have a third show. I'm going to try and get a loan from the bank for a few more shows. Hopefully they don't make me pay out the ass to pay it back. Sophie and I have been working late on the card, and here it is.

SOLW: Fight Night

SOLW Heavyweight Championship

'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli vs. Shawn Stylez

The Boss defends his title yet again, can he extend his title reign to 4 months?

X-Calibur vs. Jack Smack

The evil knight rides his golden...pony to his match against the big flunky.

Mr. Simon vs. The Warlock

The Warlock has looked strong, but the psycho is on an absolute tirade, to get back to the title scene.

Shawn Stylez vs. Chuckles

After losing his title shot, Chuckles will try to rebound with a win.

Plus, Shawn Stylez has a story to tell.

Hell yeah. That durn Billy Bob better git that durn title and beat that dang homosexual.

The midget angle was great and I like the way you brought the Corporation back. Kane and Foley should be good but maybe bringing back the Mankind character would've worked better for his match against a sadistic opponent like Kane. I'm just throwing things out there. Good job on this diary thus far.

No the story at this point is in present day and works it way up to the overtaking of WWE. At this point it's still 2006 and it will work its way through the years towards the future.

Wow...I inspirated someone. (Excuse me let me basque in this moment for a second) Ok, thanks for the compliments, and good luck with this.

That was a good backstory and I found it quite funny. The kinda, maybe, gay guy seems to be funny and I can see funny things coming from it. Punctuation and grammar are key, but other than that you're off to a good start.

Sorry I overlooked the forum with requests. My apologies.

OCC: I have adopted a new style of writing because making play-by-play up for every match is too long and I feel that my play-by-play is boring. So I will provide some play-by-play and then skip some parts and provide the ending. Thanks for reading

Pre-show Notes

There aren't any.

June 16th, Last Chance

The Warlock comes out without the RC car this time and he looks like he's got something on his mind.

The Warlock: Hello everyone! Now I'm here to discuss something with this "promoter" guy, you know, the one who makes the matches. Well I looked at the card tonight and did not find my name on it. I know why that is too. It's because I'm a virgin! I know that! You don't have to rub it in promoter guy. Why does this always happen to me! I always get cut out! People like a psycho clown get free title shots! It's just not fair!

Chuckles' music hits and it looks like for the first time he might actually talk.

Chuckles: Hehehehehe! Listen up buddy! I hear it's someone's birthday today! Me!!! (He blows kazoos and throws confetti) It's not really my birthday actually, I just like to pretend. Anyway, you think that you should get a title shot? This isn't your time! This is my chance to show the world that Chuckles is the best wrestler ever! I've been waiting for this since I first put on my clown nose. Ever since I was a wee little tike in my training clown suit. Ahem, anyway, so you want a match eh? (Honk, Honk) I need a tune up for later tonight and I have one with X-Calibur coming up right about now. So if you want a match so bad, join in the fun and let's all tango!!!

-Chuckles vs. X-Calibur vs. The Warlock-

Phatdrew: Chuckles and The Warlock start off fighting and battling back and forth. X-Calibur decides to sit back and watch with Ms. Jade by his side. Warlock hits a piledriver and then covers. X runs in and breaks up the count at two. X and The Warlock start to brawl and Chuckles comes from behind with a two-handed sledge. Boy these chicken wings are good.

After battling back and forth and X hitting the Royal Flush on Chuckles he covered for a very close three with The Warlock breaking it up. Minutes go by with Chuckles controlling all the action and basically taking this like a handicap match.

Everyone looks exhausted but it looks like Chuckles caught a second wind. He nails The Warlock with the Spraying Flower and hits X-Calibur with the Whoopie Cushion. He covers them both! 1,2,3! Chuckles wins it! If he performs like this in his title match, there's no stopping him.

Winner: Chuckles

Mr. Simon comes down to the ring and sets up a chair. He grabs a mic and takes a seat.

Mr. Simon: Somehow...I have INSTANTLY!!! Fallen out of contention for the championship. But that's ok...it's JUST FINE!!! Because tonight I have a chance to beat the bloody hell out of a JACKASS! He's "Stylish" and what not. Well good...because tonight is when I will reclaim my status as a champion! Next month, when I get my title shot, it will be with ME forever!!

Shawn Stylez comes out and attacks Mr. Simon from behind.

-Shawn Stylez vs. Mr. Simon-

Phatdrew: Simon recovers from getting sneak attacked and throws Shawn into the turnbuckle. Shawn comes bouncing out into a big clothesline. Cover, 1,2..not quite. Simon bounces off the ropes and nails him with an elbow.

Simon continues to dominate until he gets hit with a chair from Jack Smack. The ref didn't see anything and Shawn goes went for the cover but only got a two. Amazingly Simon kicked out. Shawn went up top for a big elbow but Simon got a boot to the face in. He got up quickly and started hitting him with big right hands.

Phatdrew: Mr. Simon is on a rampage with a ton of rights. He whips him into the ropes and he comes back into a big headbutt. Simon lifts him up and hits a neckbreaker. Simon grabs him and gets him into position. Their on top, Psycho Snap! 1,2,3! Mr. Simon wins it!

Winner: Mr. Simon

-Jack Smack vs. X-Calibur-

Phatdrew: Next we got this mob boss' flunky here. He's obviously a little dumb if he thinks he'll ever make it anywhere following Tony. Anyway here he comes and X-Calibur is already in the ring. They start off locking up and Jack overpowers X quickly. Ms. Jade grabs the foot of Jack and he gets out of the ring to chase her. She climbs in the ring and Jack follows but gets hit with a clothesline. It barely moves him and he goes for another. He flies off the ropes with a dropkick and finally knocks him down.

Jack takes control after a near fall and starts beating him down slowly. He took him into the corner and nails him with a big splash. After what seemed like hours, Jack finally takes him into the Mob Hit for the finish. 1,2,3!

Winner: Jack Smack

Main Event: SOLW Heavyweight Championship

-'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli vs. Chuckles-

Phatdrew: Seriously, you all need to go out and get some of these chicken wings, they are fabulous. Oh hey anyway, Tony is making his way to the ring and he looks pretty good with that belt around his waste. Chuckles' clown music hits and he comes out juggling on a unicycle. He looks happy to have this shot. They get in the ring and Chuckles honks his nose. Tony doesn't seem to enjoy it as much as the 2 three year olds in the crowd and hits him with a clothesline. He lifts him up and tosses him out of the ring. Tony grabs the ropes in front of him and slingshots himself onto the waiting Chuckles. After a short breather from both guys Tony is the first up and throws him back in the ring. Chuckles is waiting for him though and catches him with a boot to the face.

Chuckles gains control and pulls out all the stops, dominating 'The Boss'. He begins punishing Tony in a way no one has before. Minutes of this beating go by and Chuckles is looking like he's got this in the bag.

Phatdrew: Chuckles is looking like he's going to close this thing out. Hey just like that Mariano Rivera guy, aren't those Yankees having a great start to the season? Oh back to the show. Chuckles hits him with the Spraying Flower and he should be going for the cover but he's gonna look for the Whoopie Cushion. He climbs up top and gets ready. He signals to the crowd, honks his nose and he falls off!!! His big shoe got caught in the ropes! Tony picks him up quick, Mob Drop! 1,2,3! Tony is still our champion!

Winner: Tony Scarcelli

44% overall for the show

I'm not sure if I'm on the right board but I hope I am. Anyway, I was looking for someone to make me a sig for my EWR diary. If anyone is interested I know what I want and appreciate any help from anyone. Thanks.

He died because I couldn't think of a show name...no I'm just kidding. I don't know why he died I guess it was just hard for me to come up with stuff that had him in it.

I have decided to revive this diary, the show Last Chance will be up later today,

Beginning of June

Jake has been gone for a month now, it seems so much different without him. The show must go on though. No birthdays. A couple more guys go under, and we raise to 25 in the rankings. Of course it's out of 25 so it doesn't seem that great. Our sponsorship with chart wars ends. But I get them back in about 5 minutes. Our public image now sits at a respectable...dispicable 5%. Here are the overness updates.

Overness Updates

Chuckles: 20 Heel

Jack Smack: 17 Heel

Mr. Simon: 41 Heel

Ms. Jade: 9 Heel

Shawn Stylez: 20 Face

'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli: 27 Heel

The Warlock: 10 Face

X-Cal: 14 Heel

I've come to the conclusion that I have too many heels. After firing Dan Duggan, I should be saving $4,000 a month. I have decided to hire a Mr. Paul Birchall. Never really heard of him. Hmm. Anyway, I think I'll hire him in a few months. He will cost me somewhere around $10,000 a month.

The Card for Last Chance On June 16th

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match

Chuckles vs. 'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli

The evil clown has been on a winning streak as of late. Will it continue against our champion?

Jack Smack vs. X-Cal

Will the big flunky of The Boss be able to defeat the now evil knight?

Shawn Stylez vs. Mr. Simon

The psycho takes on the most stylish man on earth. At least in SOLW.

Chuckles vs. X-Cal

The evil clown takes on the evil knight. Who will win in this evil encounter?

Plus, interviews from Ms. Jade and Mr. Simon.

Mr. Simon: There is someone here, yes here. RIGHT HERE!!! Where I lost my championship belt. Last month I tried to get it back again, and he interfered again!! AGAIN!!! Can you believe, the nerve, of this, big, fat, black, ASSWIPE! If you have something to say to me, come out and say it!

Tony Scarcelli: Listen up bitch! We don't have to answer to you. He didn't screw you out of the title, you screwed yourself out of the title. If you want a rematch anytime in the near future, you need to beat Jack. Or you never get anotehr title shot! Do you understand me!

Mr. Simon: Yeah, I understand you. Loud and clear. Now listen here you little pussy. Bring your little ass down here and bring your shit to me!

Jack and Tony run down to the ring and Simon gets the jump on them both. He takes Tony and tosses him out of the ring.

Match Three

-Mr. Simon vs. Jack Smack w/ Tony Scarcelli-

Mr. Simon has Jack down and he is stomping away. Tony tries to get back in the ring but the ref keeps him out. Jack catches Simon's foot and stands up. Simon gets his momentum going and hits an enziguri. Simon covers, 1...2...No! Kickout by Jack. Simon picks him up and whips him into the ropes. Simon charges and gets hit with an elbow, then Jack slams Simon with a clothesline. Jack lets out a roar and slams his chest. Jack picks Simon up and gives him a huge bodyslam. Jack covers, 1..2..no. Simon gets the shoulder up. Jack complains to the ref that it was three. Jack grabs Simon and mounts him. He starts punching away at Simon's head and Tony is laughing on the outside. Jack throws Simon into the ropes but Simon hits a flying elbow on his way back. Simon goes off the ropes and comes down with an elbow. He stands up and nails him with a leg drop. Cover, 1..2..no kickout by Jack. Simon goes to pick him up but Jack starts fighting back. He hits a few punches and then clotheslines him. Jack goe of the ropes and hits a big splash. 1..2..No. Simon is thrown into the corner. Jack with a head of steam charges at Simon and nails him with another splash. Simon falls to the ground like a dead fish. Jack picks Simon up and sends him into the ropes. Simon gets planted with a huge powerslam. 1..2..No! Another kickout. Jack can't believe it and he looks pissed. Tony tells him to finish him off and Jack now looks pleased. He throws a chair in the ring and waits for Jack to pick it up. Jack says no and wants to finish him his way. They start arguing and Simon regains his senses. He waits for Jack to turn around and Psycho Snap! 1..2...3! It's over! Simon gets his revenge!

Winner: Mr. Simon

Stylish Stylez Show

Next out is Shawn Stylez. He's got a mic.

Shawn Stylez: Hey everyone. I'm out here to talk about Jake Roberts. He as nice to me ever since I got here. Anyway, tonight, I got Tony Scarcelli. It is for the Heavyweight Championship. I can't wait to get in the ring with that sonofabitch. His buddy Jack came down to the dog cage earlier tonight and thought it would put me out for the night by slamming me through the cage. I didn't think it was as fun. SO tonight, in about 5 minutes, I will show everyone that I deserve to be champion. And Jack Smack, if you come to the ring, I will break you. I will become champion tonight, because I'm the most stylish guy, in SOLW!!

Main Event

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match

-Shawn Stylez vs. 'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli-

Shawn looks eager to get this match started. Tony's music hits and he comes out slowly. Jack Smack doesn't seem to be around. Tony climbs in the ring and goes up on the corner showing his belt to the boos of the crowd. The bell rings and Shawn wastes no time attacking Tony he rocks him back into the corner and the ref calls for a break. Tony gets in Shawn's face and slaps him across it. Shawn doesn't look happy and he sucker punches Tony. Tony goes down and Shawn pounces on him with forearms and right hands. Shawn drags him to his feet and sets him up for a backbreaker. He hits it and goes for a pin, 1..2..No kickout by Tony. Shawn sends Tony into the ropes and hits him with a polish hammer. Shawn takes is leg and starts twisting it. Boston crab! He's got the boston crab locked in. Tony needs help. But no one is coming. We could have a new champion. Tony is clawing his way to the ropes, but Shawn drags him back to the middle of the ring. Tony is screaming in pain and he GOT THE ROPES!! Shawn releases and Tony looks seriously hurt. SHawn goes for the lower back now with a knee. He strats stomping away at it and picks him up for a scoop slam. He takes him up again with a suplex. Shawn sends Tony into the ropes and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Shawn starts punching Tony in the back. Tony gets up and starts building momentum despite his lower back. He goes off the ropes and hits a flying forearm and springs to his feet. Tony whips Shawn into the ropes and powerslams him! 1..2..kickout. He puts him up on the top rope, Mob Drop!! 1..2..3! It's over. Our champion remains!

Winner: Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli and and still SOLW Heavyweight Champion.

(46% Overall show)

Quick Results

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli d. Mr. Simon and retains

Mr. Simon d. Jack Smack

Chuckles d. Dan Duggan and Dan must leave SOLW

Shawn Stylez d. X-Cal

Mentionables

Dan Duggan Leaves SOLW!

Jake Roberts Memorial Show

The 6 fans watch in wonder. I pick up the mic.

Me: Hello and welcome. We are all here today to mourn the passing of one of our good friends. More like a family member to this buisness. He also a very close friend of mine. Him and I started this buisness, and I will finish it...for him. His favorite thing to say was, 'If shit goes wrong, just wing it'. Tonight, if shit goes wrong, we'll wing it. For Jake.

I reveal a place in the middle of the ring mat that reads:

In memory of Jake Roberts.

In the little place I made as the locker room, I put up a sign:

If shit goes wrong, just wing it.

Match One Dog Cage Match

-Shawn Stylez vs. X-Cal-

This is a dog cage match. There is a rotweiler in a seperate cage that will be released at the 5 minute mark. X-Cal goes into the cage that is next to the ring. Shawn Stylez comes out and enters the cage next. The front door is locked. The dog is in his chamber. The bell rings and X-Cal and Shawn are hesitant to start. X goes first and hits Shawn with a few chops. Shawn rocks back and fires with his own chops. These two men are chopping away at each other and we've already reached the 1 minute mark. Shawn and X both look at the clock simultaneously and start hammeing on each other harder. Shawn gets the upperhand and throws X into the side of the cage. He gives him some haymakers in the back and then slams him face into the cage. Shawn whips him into the other side and on X's bounce back he lifts him up into a back body drop. 2 minutes has not passed and Shawn goes for a cover. 1..2..no kickout. Shawn picks him up and whips him into the cage yet again. He takes his face and grinds it against the cage. X is looking at the time and Ms. Jade is at the side of the cage. She hands X something. It look like a monkey wrench! X has it in his hand and he hits Shawn with it! It just laid out Shawn! X goes for the cover, 1...2...NO!!! Kickout by Shawn! How did he do that. X can't believe it! He picks Shawn up and takes him to the door. The dog is barking and even he seems to know how much time is left. 1 minute until he is released. X smashes Shawn into the door and it starts breaking in. He throws him into it again and it breaks open. Damn those locks. Stupid hardware store. 30 seconds and X hoists Shawn onto the top of the cage. X pulls himself up there and starts stomping on Shawn. 20 seconds left. X picks Shawn up but Shawn starts fighting back. Shawn hits him with a right. X throws a right also. X hits Shawn with a low blow and here it comes, Royal Flush! Royal Flush through the cage!!!! 1...2..NO!!! The dog is out and he breaks up the count! The dog is attacking X and he bites him in the arm! X is bleeding and is in pain. The dog runs out of the cage and down the street. Shawn is the ring, Styilizer! 1..2..3! Goodnight X-Cal!

Winner: Shawn Stylez

Shawn is celebrating in the cage when Jack Smack and Tony Scarcelli come running down to the cage. Jack hits Shawn with a headbutt and Tony takes him from there. Tony takes Shawn and whips him into the cage. Tony brings Shawn outside the cage and hands him to Jack. Tony gets on top also and Tony whips him to Jack. Jack hits him with a huge Mob Hit!!! He drove him straight through the cage!!! HOLY SHIT!!!! What a way to start off the memorial show!

The Warlock Interview

Next out is The Warlock. He comes to the ring and looks very sad.

The Warlock: I can't believe he's gone. He was such a great guy backstage with all of us. He used to take us out to dinner after every show. He was the funniest guy ever. He even helped me with a little problem. I am 22, and have never had...uhh..yeah. Jake tried to help me with that. He came to me and asked me. He told me he would help me. I guess what I'm trying to say is...I'm a VIRGIN!!

Warlock runs away crying and leaves behind the curtain.

TLC Pink Slip Match

Rules: The rules of this bout are as follows; A briefcase above the ring is hung from a tree limb above the ring. Inside the briefcase is a SOLW contract. Both of these wrestlers contracts have expired, and the one who gets the contract above the ring, will win the match and stay with SOLW. As for the loser of this match, they will be dismissed.

Match Two Pink Slip TLC Match

-Chuckles vs. Hatchet Dan Duggan-

Hatchet climbs into the ring, maybe for the last time. At least in my ring. He looks up at the briefcase high above the ring and gets a very sad face. I hope I don't feel bad about firing him if he loses. Chuckles comes out and looks confident. More sinister than confident actually. He comes out with a trash bin of weapons. Remember, there are no rules in this pink slip match. Chuckles starts throwing his weapons in the ring and Hatchet pulls out his own weapon. A 2x4. Chuckles slides into the ring and the match is under way. Dan hits Chuckles with the wood and he drops to the ground. Dan starts running around with his thumb in the air, and Chuckles gets a hold of a stop sign. Dan goes to hit him with the wood again and gets nailed with the sign in the stomach. Chuckles stands up and hits him on the top of the head. Dan flops to the ground and Chuckles sees his chance. He goes out of the ring and grabs one of the three ladders. He slides the ladder in the ring and picks it up to set-up the ladder. He places it under the briefcase and the out of nowhere he gets clotheslined! Dan Duggan came out of nowhere at him! Duggan goes to the outside now and gets a table. Duggan sets the table up in the corner and then sets Chuckles up leaning against it. Dan goes to the other corner and he starts charging. He looks like he's going for the tackle but he misses! He drove himself straight through the table! Chuckles lifts himself up with help from the ropes and goes to the ladder. He starts climbing it and reaches the top. By then Dan is up there too. They start punching each other and Dan punches him hard in the face. Chuckles rocks back and nails Dan. Dan hangs on and he lifts Chuckles up. No, No!!!! Through the table on the outside!!!!! He just superplexed him through the table on the outside!! My god!!!! Dan is first to his feet, and I can't believe it! Dan is trying to get up the ladder. He makes it to the final rung and starts to pull himself up. But no! Chuckles grabs his foot and pulls him down, which smacked Dan's face off the ladder steps! Chuckles laughs to himself and grabs a chair. He waits for Dan to get up and whacks him with the chair! He lays him out! Chuckles climbs the ladder, but has a second thought. He goes outside the ring and gets a table and a ladder. He sets up the ladder near the other one. Then makes his way up the ladder with the table. He then goes over to Dan Duggan is groggily getting up and nails him with a stop sign. What the hell is Chuckles doing with the ladders? He runs to the outside and grabs the final ladder. He sets it up horizontally to the table. He grabs Dan and starts carrying him up the ladder. I had no idea he was that strong! He sets him up on the otehr side, but Dan is starting to fight back now! He gets a right, a left, another right. Chuckles is waivering, but Chuckles rams Dan's head into the top of the ladder. Chuckles picks him up and powerbomb!!!!!! POWERBOMB THROUGH THE TABLE BETWEEN THE LADDERS!!! OH MY GOD!!!! Chuckles looks down at him with a very sinister look. I can't believe he did that!!! Chuckles climbs down the ladder and up the other ladders by the briefcase. He grabs the case from the top, and he unhooks it! Chuckles is staying, Dan Duggan is gone!!!

Winner: Chuckles

Beginning of May

We begin this month on a very somber note. Our dear friend, Jake Roberts, has past away. Last night, April 30th, Jake was out partying. He was drunk, and on his way home, he wrapped the car around a tree. SOLW sends their condolences to his family, friends, and everyone in his life.

I went over to Jake's home to be with his family, and tell them about the buisness him and I ran. I am very saddened right now.

Knock...knock...knock....

Sophie: Sweetie are you okay?

Me: Go away! He's gone and I have nothing to live for!

Sophie: Listen I made the card for next month. Just take a look at it please.

The Card For Jake Roberts Memorial Show

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match

Shawn Stylez vs. 'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli

Can the number one contender become the quickest champion ever?

Jack Smack vs. Mr. Simon

Mr. Simon wants revenge on the man that cost him his title.

Chuckles vs. 'Hatchet' Dan Duggan

Who will still be here after this pink slip match?

X-Cal vs Shawn Stylez

Shawn Stylez has begun a feud with the evil knight, can X-Cal weaken Shawn for his title match, in a dog cage?

Plus, memories and stories of the late Jake Roberts.

Edit: I lost $26,000 last month. IWS, NWAPWE, JAPW, and UXW all go bankrupt. I will soon be joining them unless I get some money soon. Public image is up to 4%. At this rate, I will be out of buisness in a mere 3 shows. I hope I make it. Without Jake around the buisness seems without a purpose. I promised him we would make this the greatest thing ever on that first day. I will keep my promise to him.

Pre-Show News

Last month I lose around $35.000. When I signed Dru-Onyx I had to pay him $8,000 per appearance. I changed his name to Jack Smack, and placed him in a tag team with Tony Scarcelli. Shawn Stylez turns 19, yay! I hope he wins, I would like to see him in the main event. Plus, I don't want X-Cal to leave me. Danny Duggan didn't show up for a scheduled meeting with me. He blew it off to try and see Jim Duggan shopping for wood at 84 lumber. I suspended him for one month. To replace that match, I added Chuckles to the first match of the night. It will now be a triple threat match.

Backyard Brawl '06

Phatdrew welcomes the crowd of TWO!!! Yeehaw!

Match One

-Chuckles vs. Shawn Stylez vs. Tony Scarcelli-

Chuckles and Tony wait in the ring for Shawn Stylez. It seems as if they have created an alliance. Jack Smack is standing at Tony's side just outside the ring. Shawn's music hits and Tony and Chuckles look towards the curtain. Shawn comes out from behind them and hits Tony with a right. Tony falls and Chuckles turns around into a dropkick from Shawn. He bounces off the ropes and hits a baseball slide on Tony. Chuckles charges at Shawn and Shawn ducks out of the way. Chuckles goes flying outside the ring and Shawn starts to pick Tony up when Tony lands a punch to the stomach. Chuckles makes his way back in the ring and the double team starts on Shawn Stylez. They throw Shawn into the ropes and hit him with a double flapjack. They both start stomping away at him and then Tony goes for a cover. 1...2..No Kickout by Shawn. Chuckles picks Shawn up off the mat and throws him into the ropes. Tony throws Chuckles in after Shawn and Chuckles nails him with a big clothesline. Then Chuckles gets on his hands and knees and Tony starts running towads the corner. Tony uses Chuckles back as a step and rocks Shawn with a spinning heel kick. Cover by Tony gets another 2 count. Tony picks Shawn up and low blow! Chuckles hit him with a low blow. The ref didn't see it. Chuckles has Tony where he wants him, Spraying flower! 1..2...3!

'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli: Eliminated via pinfall

Chuckles and Shawn are now left in the ring. Chuckles and Shawn trade punches back and forth and Shawn is the first to land a kick to the mid-section. Shawn picks Chuckles up and, back breaker. He then whips him into the ropes and hits a big DDT. He goes up top, Stylez Elbow! He's waiting for him to get up. He's gonna look for the Stylizer. He kicks him in the stomach and here it comes. No Chuckles breaks out of it, Whoopie Cushin! 1..2...3!

Shawn Stylez: Eliminated via pinfall

Winner: Chuckles

Jack Smack and Tony come charging out of the back and attack Chuckles and Shawn Stylez. They beat them down and Jack hits a powerbomb on both of them. Tony tells Jack to do them in. He throws Shawn into the ropes and Mob Hit! That's that baldo bomb looking thing from last month. He calls it the Mob it! Tony throws Chuckles into the ropes now and he assumes the same fate with the Mob Hit! As Tony goes to the back, Jack stays in the ring, awaiting his match.

Match Two

-Mr. Simon and The Warlock vs. Jack Smack-

For some odd reason, after what I just saw, I don't think this will be much of a punishment for Jack. Warlock and Simon come out seperately and Simon wants revenge on Jack. They both start off by attacking him in the face. He with stands it and throws them both down. Jack catches Warlock when he tries a flying cross body, and does a huge body slam. Simon comes charging and he hits Jack with a clothesline. Jack is still standing and Simongoes for another. He finally knocks down the big man but he is quick to get up. Warlock looks like he won't be getting up anytime soon. Simon measures some shots to Jack and throws him into the ropes, but Simon can't pick him up for a powerslam. Jack hits a DDT and then splashes onto Mr. Simon. He covers, 1...2..No the break up by Warlock. Warlock starts pounding away at the back of Jack Smack but Jack turns and strikes a big forearm on Warlock. Simon dropkicks the leg of Jack and he drops to one knee. Simon starts stomping away at the left knee of Jack and he may have found a weakness. Warlock gets up and he drives his wand into the left knee of Jack. Simon and Warlock are looking to pick him up now. They do it! They just double suplexed Jack Smack!!! But the foot of Jack caught the ref in the face! Tony comes running out of the back and he hits Simon with a chair. Tony takes Simon outside the ring and hits him with the chair again. Tony slams Simon's head off the apron and takes him back to the basement. Meanwhile, in the ring, Jack is man handling Warlock. He throws him into the ropes, Mob Hit! 1...2...3!

Winner: Jack Smack

Jack stays in the ring and Tony comes out with blood on his shirt. He grabs a mic and climbs in the ring.

The Mob Interview

Tony Scarcelli: Alright listen up. This man right here, is Jack Smack. He's my bodyguard. And anybody there in the back that wants a piece of The Mob, bring it. (Long Pause) That's what I thought. This blood on my shirt, is the blood of your FORMER champion, Mr. Simon. Tonight, I have a main event match-up with him, again. We settle it all tonight though, in a barbed wire match. Jack will not be at ringside, I will whip his ass, on my own! After tonight, I will go down in SOLW history, as the greatest champion..EVER!

Jack and Tony walk out, and Shawn Stylez passes them in on his way to the ring. Jack grabs him by the throat.

Jack Smack: If you win, we'll be paying a visit to you.

Match Three

Number One Contender Match

-Shawn Stylez vs. X-Cal w/ Ms. Jade-

Shawn looks a little spooked and X-Cal comes out riding his horse. But it is not the usual horse. This horse is black with cold red eyes. This is the evil X-Cal. Ms. Jade looks very pleased and the bell rings. X locks up with Shawn and he scores a rake to the eyes. X-Cal gets stated on him with a hammerlock. Shawn powers out and hits an elbow to te side of the head. Shawn lands a combination of punches and kicks and hits a big dropkick. Shawn gets some momentum going and hits a clothesline off the ropes. He picks him up and hits a stalling suplex. Shawn mounts X and lays the punches to him. X powers out and he gets Shawn in a headlock. X nails Shawn with some punches in the face and releases the headlock. X then runs to the opposite side and smashes Shawn with a bulldog. X goes and puts Shawn in a sleeper hold. Shawn seems to be fading away. Johnny Guy (ref) raises his hand once. It drops! Johnny raises it again, it drops a second time. He picks it up one last time. It fa..NO! He got it up. Shawn is feeding off the cheers from the two people. He lands an elbow to the mid-section and bounces off the ropes with a big fist. Shawn springs up and he hits a back breaker. He throws X into the ropes and Shawn runs at him, HUGE DDT!!!!! Shawn goes up top. Stylez Elbow! He's waiting for X to get up. Jade gets on the apron, but Shawn drop kicks her off. Shawn grabs X, Styilzer! 1..2..3! Shawn is the new number one contender!

Winner: Shawn Stylez

Shawn celebrates and Ms. Jade grabs a mic.

Ms. Jade: That is bullshit! That is bullshit and you know it Shawn! You just stole that, illegally! You can't hit a women! And you know what asshole!!! Next month!!! You're facing X-Cal!!! In a dog cage!!!!!

Shawn looks confident still and laughs. He walks back to the back.

Main Event

SOLW Heavyweight Championship Match: Barbed Wire Showdown

-Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli vs. Mr. Simon

Scarcelli uses a ladder to get himself over he barbed wire ropes, and Mr. Simon does the same. He looks at the barbed wire with an absolute lust in his eyes. Tony doesn't look at all happy about it. Simon smiles at the site of barbed wire and licks his lips. They lock up and Simon over powers Tony and knocks him down. Simon pounces on Tony and starts punching in the face. He grinds his face into the mat. Simon looks up at the barbed wire and laughs. He pick Tony up and throws him into it! Oh my god! Tony is stuck to the barbed wire ropes now! Simon goesover to Tony and smashes his face into the wire. Simon tears a piece of wire off with his bare hands getting his won blood all over the place. He takes the wire and wraps it around Tony's neck. Jesus Christ!!! He's going to kill Tony! Tony is gasping for breath and is bleeding from teh back, face and neck. Tony summons some strength and flips Simon over his back. Smon lands right on top of all the barbed wire! Now Simon is bleeding! The first blood shed in SOLW! Tony now has the upperhand and he starts whipping Simon with the wire that was ripped off. Tony starts giving him lashes. Tony starts counting them off, 1...2...3...4..Simon catches the wire! Simon pulls on one end and it propels Tony into the barbed wire. Simon rips off more wire and lays it out in the middle of the ring. He picks Tony up, and he goes for the Psycho Snap! No, No!!! It's reversed! Mob Drop!!! Mob Drop onto the barbed wire!!! 1..2..3!! Tony won!!!!!

Winner and Still Champion: 'The Boss' Tony Scarcelli

(A 42% overall)

Quick Results

Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli d. Mr. Simon and retains

Shawn Stylez d. X-Cal and becomes Number One Contender

Jack Smack d. Mr. Simon and The Warlock

Chuckles d. Tony 'The Boss' Scarcelli and Shawn Stylez

Mentionables

Jack Smack debuts.

Shawn Stylez debuts.