Fait Accompli
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Easiest way to have your mood turn shitty on your birthday? Have the girl you like tell you that the chances of you two getting together are basically 0 until she deems it appropriate. Bull. Shit.
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Wriggle furiously. It's the only way to get off that hook.
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Did you smash her pasty anyway? Fuckin' man trap.
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Anyone that thinks a relationship is "appropriate" when they deem it so just needs to be walked away from. If theres any way of getting someone to stop liking you, thats it. Sack up, walk away and enjoy your birthday not thinking of this woman again. Ever. Youll be a happier man for it. And bitches love happy men.
