Worst chants

[pigeon]

We've had the best chant thread, but what about some of the worst?

Personally I think "Stand up if you hate Man U" is the worst ever. Why would you want to sing about them?

The worst we have to hear every week at Liverpool games:

"Sign on sign on with hope in your heart cause you'll never get a job"

"Champions League you're having a laugh" - especially ironic when we're still in the CL and the team we're beating are in a relegation battle.

And when Phil Thommo was still at the club there was the ever favourite "Sit down Pinnochio" - funny when West Ham started it, but less funny after being repeated every week.

And don't get me started on the Millwall fans.

So other examples, please. Americans, feel free to put your 'best' in here, because judging from the other thread all your chants are rubbish.

[fineintent]

The one that just goes "United, United, United"

I mean I get it, they all come from different places and so it's hard to get chants going - but think of something. Next time, before getting the train from London to Old Trafford, United fans should learn from the Tottenhams or West Hams about chants.

I kid - at the away games the hardcore fans normally come out. Then you can hear a distinctly northern accent in "United, United, United"

[RawIsWar]

We've had the best chant thread, but what about some of the worst?

Personally I think "Stand up if you hate Man U" is the worst ever.  Why would you want to sing about them?

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[WS1]

All the ones that go "Theirs only one....." because they're probably isn't

And isn't it "sign on, sign on with a pen in your hand, cuz you'll never work again, you'll never work again..."

I think its class much better than what you lot sang at us "You're the shit of birmingham, you're the shit of birmingham..."!

[Miami Vice]

"1....2.....2!!!" is the worst. The fans in Montreal do it every time someone kicks out of a pin.

[Dan]

"You're supposed to be at home."

WE ARE AT HOME FUCKTARDS.

[TAFKA Castroneves]

Us Leicester City fans must be more cultured we always seem to treat our team worse than the visitors!

We chant, "You don't know what your doing!" - to Micky Adams

"You're shit ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" - to out Keeper

and boo over and over when the game reaches half time or full time.

- or we even get overweight Neil Lennon lookalikes to invade the pitch and attack or players. Like the tango man except just orange on top.

[YI]

...................................LAURENT ROBERT EVERYONE KNOWS HIS NAME..............LAURENT ROBERT EVERYONE KNOWS HIS NAME........................

Shittest chant ever, however it is nearly always shouted during Newcastle matches (I even join in, but it's so bad, it's just that over and over again).

[Summers]

"Shit on the Villa" by the Birminghan fans.

No matter what, they chant in. They can be beating a team, and start chanting it. They could be 3 - 0 down to a team, and chant in. They could get relegated, and chant it.

They need to get a new chant.

[pigeon]

All the ones that go "Theirs only one....." because they're probably isn't

And isn't it "sign on, sign on with a pen in your hand, cuz you'll never work again, you'll never work again..."

I think its class much better than what you lot sang at us "You're the shit of birmingham, you're the shit of birmingham..."!

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[Guest UmpireAJS]

Wrestling=WHAT!

Football=Definitely the Stand up if u hate Man U,and I am an Arsenal fan.

[MDK]

I hate any northern teams chants. You can hear the accent and I hate northern accents. Scottish ones are fine tho B)

And the Liverpool/Sign on chant is great.

EDIT - Oh, and the 'Lets go Jets/Leaves' chant in America. Damn, thats original.

Edited December 30, 2004 by MDK

[ADG]

You're shite, and you know you are!

Same old Celtic, always cheating!

We're bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, na na na na na!

[Guest Cashmiesta]

I like Aston Villa chanting Villa cos they sould like little kids whose ball aint dropped

My personal favourites are..and sorry for the language

Artim Sakiri - He scores from corner kicks

Artim Sakiri - He knows that Beckham's s**t

Artim Sakiri - Lobbing Seaman all day

One go down, we all go down

All go down together

Come back up, win the Cup

Kick f**k out the Villa

We go up, we all go up

All go up together

We stay up, win the Cup

Wolves go down forever

Bryan Robson's Barmy Army

There were 11 on the field

And Warnock squealed : 'fall over, fall over'

So they all fell over

and one was sent off

There were 10 on the field

And Warnock squealed: 'fall over, fall over'

So they all fell over

And one was sent off

There were 9 on the field

And Warnock squealed: 'fall over, fall over'

So they all fell over

And one was sent off

There were 8 on the field

And Warnock squealed: 'fall over, fall over'

So they all fell over

And one was sent off

There were 7 on the field

And Warnock squealed: 'fall over, fall over'

So they all fell over

And one was sent off

There were six on the field

And the Albion squealed:

'Neil Warnock

Worra w**ker

Worra w**nker

Neil Warnock.....'

Oh would you like to follow West Brom,

Come up the Hawthorns and cheer 'em on,

Remember Regis, Astle and Brown,

Or would you rather be a clown

(WHAT'S A CLOWN?)

A clown is an Animal who follows the blues,

It sits on the Tilton just to watch its team lose,

They've got no trophies,

They've got no class,

They've got Karren Brady and she takes it up the a*se

So If you don't want' to sh*g Brady,

come up the Albion with me.

Or would you rather be a seal?

(WHAT'S A SEAL?)

A seal is an animal that sits on a rock

It licks its own a*se and it plays with its c*ck,

they've got no grace, they've got no style,

They've got John Gregory who's a paedophile,

So if you don't want to sh*g Gregory,

come up the Albion with me.

Or would you rather be a wolf?

(WHAT'S A WOLF?)

A wolf is an animal that eats its own sh*t,

It don't know how to talk but it knows how to spit,

It'll rob your Granny,

It'll take her bag,

It'll give it to its sister and then take her for a sh*g,

So if you don't want to sh*g your family,

come up the Albion with me.

Stevie Bull's a Tatter, he wears a Tatter's hat

He plays for Wolverhampton, and he's a f****g tw*t

He runs down the left wing, he runs down the right

He couldn't score a goal if he played all f*****g night

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh

Stevie Bull's a Tatter (repeat ad infinitum)

Oh, Wanky Wanky

Wanky Wanky Wanky Wanky Wanderers

The Lord's my shepherd

I'll not want

He makes me down to lie

In pastures green

He leadeth me

The quiet waters by

So sorry Junky and mods and admins if spamming, I just thought I let you all know that West Brom may go down but we kick ass and Villa and Dingles and crap!

[Summers]

I'd rather shag Gregory than step into the Hawthorns.

[IAceI]

Racist Monkey Chants.

They suck.

[FLiam]

That annoying United chant about nick nacks or something. And there constant "UNITED! UNITED!" and also their constant appeals for handballs. And also their constant bitching during Arsenal/Utd games when all you can hear is "Same old Arsenal, always cheating.".

Lame ass Mancunians.

[evertonfan]

I'm with Pigeon on the "Sign on..." chants, and also when other teams sing "You'll Never Walk Alone". I hate that. And also, Liverpool had a shocker of a chant at the derby. To the tune of La Bamba (or is it La Cucaracha?), the chant lists all of the Spanish players at Liverpool, with the exception of Josemi, but that might be because he's shit.

There are certain songs that should stay away from football. That is one of them.

EDIT: Not strictly a chant, but any set of fans that has "novelty" fans, e.g Liverpool's Badge Man, Mr Portsmouth etc. give me another reason to be happy I support Everton. Same goes for fans with instruments/bands, and I am including England in that.

Edited December 30, 2004 by evertonfan

[Guest Cashmiesta]

Yeh Evertonfan, they sang it at the Albion match I think its 'Stevie Stevie Gerrard or John Arne Risse, Bangs em top corner'

La Bamba its called. The Albions are good

I found a knew on with the tune of kum by yah

He wears Gold and Black and he is crap;

He wears Gold and Black and he is crap;

He wears Gold and Black and he is crap;

Kenny Miller you dingle t**t

Thats what we sing against wolves

And heres two about Dobie and Dichio who are both at Milwall

Daniele Dichio, Danile Dichio na nha nha nah na

When the ball its the goal its not shearer or scholes, it's scott dobie

or

Boing Boing, Boing Boing lol

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[The Slickman]

I have 3.

"RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD"

"Glory , Glory , Man Utd"

That is a Spurs song , always has been , always will be . Fair enough not much glory at the Spurs at the moment but we will not allow other fans to steal our chants ! (Also The Arsenal) .

As a Spurs fan every single Jew song directed at us , we arent a Jewish club any more . We took the joke 30 years ago and we took it on the chin and converted it to spur on the team with the "YID ARMY" chants but you took a poll on how many Spurs fans are Jewish i would bet its about 1/3rd .

I think the "sign on , sign on with a pen in your hand cos you'll never get a job"

is brilliant . The first Liverpool game i ever went to i heard that i laughed and i still find it funny . Also the festive "Feed The Scousers , Let Them Know Its Christmas Time" .