World Wrestling Entertainment

[Boulder]

WWE Velocity

January 8, 2005

Josh Mathews: Hello, and welcome to WWE Velocity! I’m Josh Mathews, he’s Steve Romero, and this is one hour of intense wrestling action!

Steve Romero: Absolutely, Josh- The Bashams versus Holly and Haas- big time action!

Josh Mathews: Plus, we’ll be looking at the developments regarding JBL, Kurt Angle, and The Big Show from Smackdown this week. But first up, we’ve got Chavo Guerrero versus Akio!

Chavo Guerrero versus Akio

Chavo was met with a huge chorus of cheers, one which persisted throughout the match. Akio matched Chavo move for move, though, even showing a quickness advantage at points. Chavo stepped out in front with a big backdrop, then started pounding away on Akio in the corner. Akio tried to recapture the advantage with a crossbody, but Chavo ducked it. Shortly thereafter, he was able to hit the Gory Bomb, scoring the pin at 6:28.

Crowd: 68.8%

Match: 75.4%

Overall: 80.5%

Josh Mathews: A big win by Chavo, and listen to these fans, Steve! This is unreal, they love Chavito!

Steve Romero: He’s got the Guerrero charisma for sure, Josh! And speaking of charisma, how about Smackdown, when Kurt Angle and JBL got face to face?

Josh Mathews: That one was off the charts!

WWE Champion John Bradshaw Layfield, sans the members of his Cabinet, makes his way to the ring with a microphone.

JBL: Thank you, thank you.  Please hold all applause until the end.  Ladies and gentlemen, tonight, marks the beginning of a new year.  Now, 2004 was a year of great success- both personal and professional- for your WWE Champion.  Not only did I win the title, but the list of superstars I’ve beaten is nothing short of astounding.  Eddie Guerrero, Booker T, The Undertaker… (he smirks) Shannon Moore… none of them could take this title from me.  But don’t get down, folks.  Because I, JBL, promise that the year 2005 will outshine 2004 in every way possible!  The economy will rise, crime will fall, the sun will shine a little brighter, and all because John Bradshaw Layfield will be defending the WWE Championship against all comers!  And what better way to start than by beating Kurt Angle and The Big Show at the Royal Rumble?  Here’s a tip, folks: buy stock in JBL!

Kurt Angle’s music begins to play.  Angle, also by himself, makes his way to the ring.

Tazz: I think Angle may have somethin’ to say about JBL’s stock!

Kurt Angle: JBL… I’ll be perfectly honest.  I’ve got a lot of respect for you.  Don’t forget who was GM when you got your big break.

JBL seems a little annoyed, but he smiles and nods.

Kurt Angle: 2004 was a great for you, John, there’s no denying that.  But I’m wondering how 2005 can beat it when you lose the WWE Title four weeks in!

JBL: Kurt- Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, Kurt… you talk a good game, and I can appreciate that.  But my track record doesn’t lie.  I’ve been a freight train since winning this belt.  Anyone and everyone in my way has been turned away and humiliated.  My Cabinet gets stronger every day, Kurt.  What makes you think that you’ll be any different?

Kurt Angle: (brandishes gold medals) These make me think I’ll be different.

JBL: That’s cute, but we’re talking about the sport of kings, Kurt.  Not ballet.

JBL puts his hand on Kurt Angle’s shoulder.  Infuriated, Angle shoves him.  JBL shoves back, and Angle pounces.  The two rumble around on the mat until a host of referees and road agents come out to separate them.

Michael Cole: Angle is explosive!  But with what John Bradshaw Layfield said, how could he not be?

Tazz: JBL makes a habit of pickin’ his spots real well, but even I gotta say, maybe he shouldn’t be prodding Kurt Angle like that!

Josh Mathews: But it didn’t end there, folks. Later on, we’ll see that Angle had more on his mind than he was letting on!

Steve Romero: As always, Josh! The Olympic Gold Medalist can be very conniving!

Nunzio versus Shannon Moore

Nunzio took Moore to the mat and got the better of him to begin, but Moore held his own with a bulldog and a running knee. Nunzio tried to keep the pace of the match slow, but Shannon Moore seemed to have the upper hand, nailing a second rope dropkick for a two count. Moore continued to retain the advantage until Nunzio sidestepped a Mooregasm. He immediately pulled Moore up by the arm and nailed the Arrivederci, leading to the three count at 7:41. Post match, Moore extended his hand and Nunzio shook it.

Crowd: 62.1%

Match: 72.2%

Overall: 65.5%

Steve Romero: An important win by Nunzio- you can bet he’ll be looking towards Cruiserweight Champion Funaki soon enough!

Josh Mathews: I’ll bet. Fans, as we showed you earlier, JBL and Kurt Angle had an altercation on Smackdown. Later that night, The Big Show became involved in the business between the two.

John Bradshaw Layfield makes his way out to the ring first, greeted by a cavalcade of jeers.

JBL: Yes, yes, thank you, but I have business to attend to.  Big Show, I don’t want to fight, I want to talk.  So if you think you’re capable of that, then come on down to my ring.

The Big Show complies, entering the arena and stepping into the ring with the WWE Champion.

The Big Show: What exactly is it that you want, Bradshaw, besides to piss me off good?

JBL: I’ve just got a little surprise for you, that’s all.

Orlando Jordan, still woozy from his match with Booker T, rushes into the ring from the crowd and attacks The Big Show from behind.  Show is staggered, but remains on his feet.  He turns around and grabs a terrified Jordan.  Just then The Basham Brothers run out from under the ring and attack Show from either side.  Show tries to hold his own, but the numbers are two much for him.

Michael Cole: I don’t believe this!  What a set-up!

Tazz: Hey, Show thought he could handle the entire Cabinet, so he put his money where his mouth was!  Turns out he was wrong!

Michael Cole: And look at Bradshaw, laughing from the side!  Some champion!

At that point, Kurt Angle sprints out to the ring.  As he slides in, The Bashams and Orlando Jordan back off and jump out of the ring.  JBL puts his hands up in a conciliatory gesture and steps to the arena floor.

Michael Cole: Thank goodness Kurt Angle came out to stop this massacre!

Angle helps Big Show to his feet, then runs back to the ropes and takes Big Show down with a chop block.  Angle applies the Ankle Lock to The Big Show as JBL and his Cabinet watch on amusedly.

Michael Cole: No!  Angle wanted to lay into The Big Show as well!  This isn’t right!

Tazz: Right or wrong, Cole, JBL and Kurt Angle may have figured out how to eliminate an angry giant: teamwork!

Michael Cole: If that’s the case, then it doesn’t look good for The Big Show at the Royal Rumble at all!

Josh Mathews: By working together, JBL and Kurt Angle could neutralize The Big Show… or they could just make him very, very angry!

Steve Romero: They’re playing a dangerous game, Josh!

The Basham Brothers versus Hardcore Holly and Charlie Haas

Hardcore Holly opened the match with his usual offense on Danny Basham, lacing into him with chops and kicks. Danny tried to come back with a snapmare and a neck vise, but Holly escaped and hit his dropkick for two. Danny tagged Doug, who hit a DDT and took control of Holly. The Bashams tagged back and forth, keeping Hardcore Holly close to their corner while working on his neck. Holly finally broke loose and made the hot tag to Charlie Haas, who gave the legal man, Doug, a dropkick, and decimated Danny with an Exploder Suplex. Doug fired back with a double eyepoke, causing Holly to make the blind tag. Holly charged in, but Doug backdropped him. When Holly got to his feet, Doug Basham caught him with a Leg Lariat. Basham made the cover and scored the pin at 11:35.

Crowd: 61.2%

Match: 65.4%

Overall: 64.0%

Josh Mathews: What a match, and what a victory! It looks like the Bashams are back in a big way!

Steve Romero: And with JBL behind them, the sky’s the limit!

Show Rating: 68.2%

[Boulder]

WWE Sunday Night Heat

January 9, 2005

Todd Grisham: Hi, everybody! Welcome to WWE Sunday Night Heat! I’m Todd Grisham, beside the lovely Ivory, and we are 60 minutes away from New Year’s Revolution!

Ivory: That’s right, Todd, and I can’t wait! We’re gonna see a new World Heavyweight Champion tonight, guaranteed!

Todd Grisham: A new champion in the Elimination Chamber! We’ve got a whole bunch of great matches lined up for tonight, including one for the Intercontinental Title. Let’s see how things with that match developed on Raw.

Maven cuts off Shelton Benjamin’s celebration, coming onto the stage with a microphone.

Maven: Congratulations, Champ!  Hope that win didn’t take too much out of you!  Especially since I’ve got a little surprise for ya!

Jim Ross: Surprise?

Jerry Lawler: He’s got Shelton’s attention!

Maven: Remember when I pinned you a couple weeks back, Shelton?  If you don’t, let me remind you.  I rolled you up right in the center of that ring for the one, two, three.  But let me take this where this is going.  I just came from General Manager Bischoff’s office, and I pled my case.  So on January 9, at New Year’s Revolution, you’re gonna be defending the Intercontinental Title against… me!

Benjamin is a little startled, but keeps calm.

Maven: Now settle down, Shelton.  I know this isn’t your idea of a perfect situation, but you still got six days to prepare.  So if I were you, I’d spend a lot of quality time with that belt while you still can!

Todd Grisham: And we’ll see what happens with that later tonight.

Ivory: Maven wants it, Todd! I don’t know if he’ll be denied.

Todd Grisham: We shall see. Also tonight, Simon Dean will take on The Hurricane. Earlier, The Coach caught up with Hurricane to see what was on his mind.

Hurricane’s Fury

Jonathan Coachman is standing backstage with The Hurricane.

Jonathan Coachman: Since debuting, Simon Dean has seen fit to ridicule and abuse your sidekick, Rosey, at every opportunity- even going so far as to attack Rosey. Tonight, you’ll get Dean one on one. What are your thoughts?

The Hurricane: First of all, Citizen Coach, Rosey is not my sidekick- he is my partner. Second of all, he’d be handling Simon Dean tonight, if not for the insidious attack perpetrated by Citizen Dean on Raw. And third of all, Simon Dean doesn’t have any idea what he’s gotten himself into. If someone messed with The Thing, The Fantastic Four would whoop some ass. If someone touched Batman, the Superfriends would be right there with a bitchslappin’! So when someone smashes a jar on good Roosevelt’s head, you better believe that The Hurricane is gonna be there to ask “What’s up with that?”

Overall: 80.4%

Ivory: The Hurricane is all focus! I wouldn’t want to be Simon Dean tonight!

Todd Grisham: Not sure if I’d want to be Edge, either, after the way he steamed up Chris Benoit on Raw! Let’s take a look at that.

Edge: Six days.  I only have to wait six more days until I get to be the World Heavyweight Champion.  Every time it’s been stolen from me, every time it’s been dangled in front of me and ripped away, every damn time it’s been so close… it doesn’t matter.  Because in six days, I reach the mountaintop, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it.  You see, this time, I don’t have to live and die by your vote.  And to the boys in the back, I don’t have to depend on any of you.  The only person I need to worry about is the same person who won the Intercontinental Title all those times, the same person who’s responsible for Kurt Angle’s bald head, and the same person who got through a year of rehabbing a broken neck.  This Sunday, this only person I need to depend on is Edge.  I’ve been in hell these past few months, all this crap with Michaels, Orton, Benoit, but it ends this Sunday.  At New Year’s Revolution, I finally get some salvation.  When I get my hands on that title, I can finally say that everything will be alright.

The fans erupt as Chris Benoit’s music begins to play.  Benoit enters the ring with a microphone of his own in tow.

Chris Benoit: You say you’ve been in hell these past few months, Edge?  Well, I’ll punch your ticket right back there!  Since Taboo Tuesday, you’ve been bitching and moaning about the World Heavyweight Championship.  And as annoying as it’s been, after all the grief you’ve caused me, I like hearing you scream!  And for what it’s worth, I don’t expect it to end anytime soon!

Edge: Is that right, Chris?  And you think you’re gonna be the one to do something about it?

Chris Benoit: You’re damn right I am!

Edge: Well, if that helps you sleep better until Sunday, good for you.  Just keep thinking that you’ll make me tap out.  Hey, maybe you’ll make all five of us tap out at the same time, Benoit.  Think that all you want… but you can’t wear it around your waist!

Chris Benoit: Save it, Edge.  But from a former tag team partner to another, here’s a piece of free advice.  (Benoit pokes Edge’s chest as he delivers each word) Watch- out- for- me!

Edge rears back and throws a right hand, but Benoit blocks it.  He grabs Edge by the hair and tosses him over the ropes.  The crowd cheers as a stunned Edge gets to his feet.

Here Comes the Legend Killer

The camera cuts to the back, where Randy Orton has just arrived. He walks through the arena in street clothes, a bag slung over his shoulder. Orton greets a few of the backstage workers, then goes back on his way to the locker room.

Overall: 84.3%

Todd Grisham: Welcome back, fans. Not only did we just see Edge and Benoit getting into it on Raw, but we saw the arrival of “The Legend Killer” Randy Orton. He’s gotta be an odds-on-favorite to win tonight’s Elimination Chamber match.

Ivory: He did impress me in the big six man tag on Raw last week.

Todd Grisham: He showed great endurance in that match.

Edge and Benoit started the match, brawling with fury inspired by their earlier encounter.  Edge seemed to be gaining the upper hand when he backed Benoit into a corner, but the Rabid Wolverine fought out and hit a hard snap suplex.  The two battled on until Benoit tried to lock in the Crippler Crossface, at which point Edge tagged Batista.  Evolution’s largest member beat on Benoit, scoring a two after a Samoan Drop.  Benoit tagged out to Jericho, who used his speedy offense to take Batista off of his feet.  However, Batista put his knees up to block a Lionsault, and from there he reclaimed the advantage.  Benoit and Jericho traded tags to wear down the big man, finally forcing him to tag Triple H.  Benoit brought Randy Orton in, who clotheslined The Game, hiptossed Batista, and dropkicked an entering Edge.  Orton attempted to hit the RKO on Triple H, but he was shoved off into the ropes.  Triple H caught him from behind in a sleeperhold, but he was unable to put Orton away.  Orton fought out and hit a flying forearm, then nailed the RKO.  However, Batista broke the ensuing pinfall attempt, dragged Triple H to the corner, got on the apron, and tagged himself in.  He powerslammed Orton, then continued to wear him down with stomps and punches.  When HHH regained his bearings, the three heels were able to tag off frequently, making short work of Orton.  This continued until Orton hit a neckbreaker on Edge, then managed to make a hot tag to Y2J.  Jericho ran in, took out Batista and Triple H with enziguri kicks, then hit Edge with a Lionsault for the pin at 17:02.

Todd Grisham: Jericho scored the win for his team, and got a lot of momentum heading into tonight’s main event. We’re right about to get to New Year’s Revolution, fans, but first, a bonus match on Sunday Night Heat. Let’s go to the ring.

Stevie Richards versus Viscera

Despite having the crowd behind him, Stevie Richards was unable to budge the enormous Viscera. He tried punches, a flying forearm, and a dropkick, but the big man did not leave his feet. When Viscera unleashed a clothesline of his own, Stevie was knocked to the mat. Big Vis then applied a chinlock, nearly sapping all of Richards’s energy. However, Stevie managed to get back to his feet. He nailed Viscera with a Steviekick, which knocked him into the ropes. Stevie then climbed to the top turnbuckle and nailed a Missile Dropkick, finally knocking the former King of the Ring to the mat. Stevie made the cover, and scored the win at 7:09.

Crowd: 53.0%

Match: 50.0%

Overall: 41.9%

Todd Grisham: What a win! Stevie Richards beats the biggest man on Raw!

Ivory: What a way to head into New Year’s Revolution!

Todd Grisham: There’s still time, fans! Call your local satellite or cable operator to order WWE New Year’s Revolution! For Ivory, I’m Todd Grisham!

Show Rating: 70.9%

Edited January 22, 2005 by Scott Boulder Fried

[Boulder]

WWE New Year’s Revolution

January 9, 2005

Jim Ross: Welcome, fans, and thank you so much for joining us on Raw’s inaugural Pay-Per-View offering of the year! I’m Jim Ross, this is Jerry Lawler, and King, what a main event we’ve got tonight!

Jerry Lawler: You ain’t kidding, J.R.! The Elimination Chamber, only the third in history, and the vacant World Heavyweight Championship is on the line!

Jim Ross: It’s such an explosive, brutal match, King- any of those six men could walk away with the title, and any of them could end up in jeopardy. And speaking of title situations, we’re kicking off with what’s sure to be a slobberknocker- Shelton Benjamin versus Maven!

WWE Intercontinental Championship Match: Shelton Benjamin © versus Maven

Maven charged at Shelton Benjamin to start, but the Intercontinental Champion took him over with a Japanese armdrag. Maven popped up, and Benjamin nailed him with a hiptoss. When Maven came up a third time, he shrank back from Benjamin and slid out of the ring. As the crowd booed, Maven walked around the arena floor, regaining his bearings.

Maven slid back into the ring and quickly locked up with Shelton Benjamin. Maven got an armlock out of it, which he wrenched in tightly. Benjamin tried to roll out of it, but as he attempted, Maven caught him with a stiff kick between the shoulder blades. The Intercontinental Champion fell to the mat, and Maven immediately followed up with an elbow drop. Maven got up, ran to the ropes, and came back with a big kneedrop on Shelton Benjamin. Maven followed with a cover, but Benjamin kicked out.

Maven, intent on sticking it to Benjamin, continued his assault. He lifted the champion up and dropped him with a vicious backbreaker. Rather than drop Benjamin, Maven kept him on his knee, continuing to bend his back. Shelton struggled, but was caught in the hold. Finally, he managed to connect a knee strike to Maven’s head, forcing him to break the hold. Benjamin got to his feet and caught Maven in a waistlock. He lifted the challenger, but in a surprising show of speed, Maven rolled forward and cradled Shelton Benjamin. Benjamin kicked out, but was visibly stricken by Maven’s resourcefulness.

The Intercontinental Champion faked a lockup, grabbed Maven by the legs, and took him down to the mat. He connected with a few right hands to Maven’s face, then flipped him over and drove a knee into his back. Before Maven could even vocalize his pain, Benjamin lifted him to his feet and nailed a lightning-quick snap suplex. Benjamin covered, but it was Maven’s turn to kick out.

Both men got back to their feet. Maven was starting to show signs of anger, but Benjamin kept an amused air about himself. They grappled once again, with Shelton backing Maven into the corner. He broke, as ordered by referee Jack Doan, but Maven shoved him back. With Benjamin staggered, Maven charged out of the corner and nailed a vicious dropkick to the chin of the Intercontinental Champion. Maven popped back up and opened his arms to the crowd, which led to a smattering of boos. Maven grabbed Benjamin’s legs, lifted them up, and rolled onto him, creating a pinning situation. Benjamin managed to kick out, but only after the longest of two counts.

Maven got back to his feet, and finally seemed to have completely lost his cool. He stomped on Shelton Benjamin over and over, until Benjamin finally managed to grab the bottom rope. Even then, Doan had to physically place himself between Maven and Benjamin to stop the challenger’s assault. Benjamin pulled himself up by the ropes, at which point Maven charged at him. Benjamin showed his agility by countering with a backdrop, which sent Maven flying to the arena floor. Benjamin fell to his knee, at a loss for strength.

By the time Maven managed to pry himself off of the floor and roll back into the ring, Shelton Benjamin was ready to go. He lifted Maven to his feet, whipped him into the ropes, and caught him with a powerslam as he came back. Rather than make a cover, Benjamin pointed to the top turnbuckle, which drew a cheer from the crowd. The Intercontinental Champion climbed to the top, and when Maven got to his feet, he took him down with a flying clothesline. Shelton covered, but Maven managed to kick out.

Undaunted, Shelton Benjamin lifted Maven to his feet. In a last-ditch attempt to gain some offense, Maven surprised Benjamin with a forearm, then attempted to whip him into the corner. However, Shelton reversed the whip and Maven was sent to the turnbuckle. Without hesitation, Benjamin charged at Maven and demolished him with a Stinger Splash. Maven staggered out of the corner, at which point Benjamin grabbed him around the torso and behind the leg. He connected with the Exploder Suplex, then scored the pinfall at 14:14.

Crowd: 77.2%

Match: 69.8%

Overall: 75.9%

Jim Ross: What a match! Impressive showing by Maven, but he couldn’t get it done against possibly the most athletic Intercontinental Champion of all time!

Jerry Lawler: Alright, J.R., I’ll give him credit- Benjamin brought it big-time tonight!

Evolution Gears Up

Triple H, Batista, and Ric Flair are backstage in Evolution’s locker room.

Ric Flair: Do you believe this? Tonight! Elimination Chamber! And Evolution’s holding all the cards! Nine-time World Champion Triple H! The monster Batista! We can’t lose, brother!

Triple H: You’re damn right, Naitch. Big man here’s the best insurance policy a guy can hope for. Only problem is that you’re the last man in, so we can’t start the demolition immediately. A little short-sighted of ya, that’s all.

Batista just nods.

Triple H: You got everything taken care of, Ric?

Ric Flair: Sure do, champ! The champagne is on ice, the hotel reservations have been made, and the babes- Whooo!- are percolatin’!

Triple H: You’re the man, Ric.

Ric Flair: No, YOU’RE the man!

Triple H: I’ll catch up with you guys later (he slaps Batista on the shoulder).

Triple H leaves, and Batista turns to go. Ric Flair grabs him by the arm.

Ric Flair: Big man- you’re not thinkin’ about going into business for yourself out there, are you?

Batista looks at Flair for a second, then turns and leaves silently.

Overall: 79.7%

Jerry Lawler: I know what you’re gonna say, J.R., but trust me, Batista knows what to do. He’ll protect Triple H!

Jim Ross: Well, we’ll see whether that’s the case. And I think Evolution’s in for a surprise if they’ve got a party planned for tonight. Remember the first Elimination Chamber? Triple H spent the night in the emergency room!

Jerry Lawler: Stop being such a downer, J.R.! If you weren’t such a party pooper, maybe you could get on Evolution’s guest list!

Jim Ross: Something to shoot for in the future. On another note, we’ve got The Coach backstage with Simon Dean, who’s got something to say before his match with The Hurricane.

The Simon Challenge

Jonathan Coachman is backstage with Simon Dean.

Jonathan Coachman: Simon Dean, up next, you’ll be making your WWE Pay-Per-View debut against The Hurricane. Do you have anything to say to him before your match?

Simon Dean: Coach, let me start off by saying just how much I hate Puerto Rico. Places like New York, Seattle, and Minneapolis may be filled with fatties, but you don’t have to worry about them taking their shirts off at the beach in the middle of January! As for The Hurricane, I can’t wait to get my hands around his skinny little neck. A super hero? Please! What’s so special about a spindly loser in a mask? And he’s upset because of what I did to Rosey? Mark my words, Coach- whether he’s getting his Hurri-panties in a bunch over his fat sidekick, or whether he’s in the gym maxing out on the bench with 70 pounds, he’s on the fast track to nowhere. But I’m a generous guy; after I win, I’ll talk to Hurricane about receiving a free sample of the newest product in the Simon System line: Simon Dean’s Maximum Muscle Builder! Guaranteed to turn puny punks into pumped-up powerhouses!

Overall: 77.5%

Jim Ross: Well, apparently, Simon Dean isn’t looking to smooth things over with The Hurricane anytime soon!

Jerry Lawler: Why should he, J.R.? If more people took Simon Dean’s advise, we’d live in a less crowded world!

Simon Dean versus The Hurricane

The Hurricane pounced on Simon Dean as soon as he got into the ring, raining down on him in the corner with fists and forearms. Referee Chad Patton tried to get involved, but Hurricane could not be dissuaded. He grabbed Dean by the hair, lifted him to his feet, and whipped him across the ring. When Dean collided with the opposite ringpost, he fell to the mat. Hurricane lifted him up and slammed him into the center of the ring. Dean rolled back to the corner, where Hurricane once again advanced on him. However, this time, Simon Dean grabbed Hurricane by the tights and pulled him forward, sending him into the turnbuckle. Dean rolled Hurricane up from behind, but only scored two.

Hurricane popped back up to his feet, but Simon Dean quickly plowed over him with a clothesline. Dean lifted him to a sitting position from behind, and caught The Hurricane across the head with a few crossface blows. Dean dropped Hurricane to the mat, ran to the ropes, and came back with a somersault senton across The Hurricane’s chest. Simon Dean simply laid on The Hurricane as a cover, but The Hurricane kicked out after two.

Dean got back up to his feet, and began lacing into The Hurricane with repeated boots. He dropped an elbow, but The Hurricane rolled out of the way and got to his feet. As Simon Dean got up to a knee, The Hurricane nailed him with a Shining Black. After taking a moment to regain his breath, The Hurricane grabbed Dean’s legs and rolled over into a jackknife cover. However, Simon Dean managed to drape his left hand under the bottom rope, breaking Patton’s count.

Both men were slow to get to their feet, but Hurricane reached a standing base first. He pounded Dean across the back with a few rights and lefts, then whipped him into the ropes. Dean came back with a clothesline, which The Hurricane ducked. When Dean came back again, he launched himself with a crossbody, but The Hurricane caught him in the gut with a dropkick. The Hurricane immediately covered Simon Dean, but once again, Dean managed to kick out.

The Hurricane still had more tricks up his sleeve, however. He lifted Dean up and slammed him, then climbed to the top turnbuckle. When Dean managed to get up, The Hurricane leapt off with a double axe handle. However, Simon Dean dodged the maneuver and caught Hurricane in the abdomen with a vicious closed fist. Hurricane flipped over and hit the mat hard, at which point Dean snatched him up, grabbed him around the head, lifted him, and plowed him into the canvas with a front suplex.

With an air of rage replacing his earlier cockiness, Dean lifted The Hurricane to his feet. He whipped Hurricane to the ropes, but with one last-ditch effort, The Hurricane came back with a flying forearm and knocked Dean to the mat. The Hurricane signaled for Simon Dean to get up, and when he did, Hurricane kicked Dean in the stomach, turned him around, grabbed his arms, and lifted him for the Vertebreaker. However, by kicking his legs, Simon Dean was able to fall backwards and escape the move. The Hurricane turned around to face Dean, but Dean quickly grabbed him in a cravat hold and dove forward, driving Hurricane’s head into the mat. Simon Dean rolled The Hurricane over and pinned him at 10:34.

Crowd: 67.6%

Match: 73.5%

Overall: 81.5%

Jim Ross: Credit where credit is due, King- a hard-fought victory by one of Raw’s least popular superstars, Simon Dean.

Jerry Lawler: The only reason Dean isn’t popular is because the truth hurts, J.R.! And I was talking to Simon Dean earlier today, do you know what he calls that move?

Jim Ross: I give up.

Jerry Lawler: The Carb Cutter! Get it?

Jim Ross: Yes, I think I do.

The Easy Way

The camera cuts to the backstage area. Chris Jericho is walking down a corridor, a determined look on his face. Christian steps out from a perpendicular corridor, right in front of Jericho.

Chris Jericho: What the hell do you want, junior?

Christian: Hey, take it easy. I’m not looking for a fight. I’ve just got a bit of a request.

Chris Jericho: Spit it out, some of us have matches tonight.

Christian: Just in case your memory’s getting faulty, I beat you at WrestleMania last year. The biggest stage of them all, and your shoulders were flat on the mat. In fact, if I recall, I spent most of 2004 making your life a living hell.

Chris Jericho: And what’s your point, Captain C.L.B.?

Christian: My- my point is that you’re the odds-on-favorite to win this match since last Monday. Hell, even before then, I was betting on you, after knowing what you’re capable of.

Chris Jericho: Wanna stop kissing my ass long enough to get down to business?

Christian: Fine, you want the bottom line? If you become the World Heavyweight Champion, I want first crack at you. Tomorrow night on Raw, Chris Jericho versus Christian for the World Heavyweight Title.

Chris Jericho: Yeah, that makes sense. One night after one of the most brutal, one of the most painful, and one of the absolute most vicious matches in the industry, you want me to wrestle you? Thanks, but no thanks, assclown.

Jericho walks past Christian, then continues down the hall.

Christian: Fine! Fine! Next week, then. Eight days. If you can’t make it by then, well, heh, there’s no excuse in the world that’ll save ya!

Jericho turns back around.

Chris Jericho: Eight days? You want a match in eight days, you got it. But guess what? It’ll happen whether I’m the champion or not!

Jericho turns back around and walks away, leaving Christian with an unsure look on his face.

Overall: 85.9%

Jim Ross: Christian may have bitten off a bit more than he could chew! He was only looking to wrestle if Jericho was the champ, but it’ll go down regardless!

Jerry Lawler: Don’t you ever get tired of running your mouth, J.R.? Christian’s more than happy to wrestle Jericho anytime, under any circumstances. Remember who won at WrestleMania?

Jim Ross: Yeah, and I also remember who won the cage match, and who won the ladder match!

Jerry Lawler: Alright, J.R., way to throw in some useless information. Let’s just go to the Women’s Title match!

WWE Women’s Championship Match: Lita © versus Trish Stratus

Lita and Trish circled each other gingerly to start. Lita raised a hand, indicating her desire to start out with a test of strength. After a moment's hesistation, Trish complied, locking her hand with Lita’s. Lita raised her other hand, which Trish took, and they went shoulder to shoulder. After some struggling, Lita managed to get her head under Trish’s arm and take her over with a suplex. Lita retained her grip on Trish’s hand, pulled her to her feet, and whipped her to the ropes. As Trish bounced back, Lita backdropped her to the canvas. As the fans cheered, Lita popped to her feet and flashed the old “2Xtreme” hand signal.

Trish was far from out of the match, though. When Lita bent over to lift her up, Trish grabbed Lita’s face and used her fingernails to rake the eyes of the Women’s Champion. As Lita stumbled back, Trish got to her feet. She bodyslammed Lita with authority, then scored a two count off of a jumping legdrop. Trish then applied a chokehold to Lita, which she broke at the admonition of referee Charles Robinson. After dropping a knee across the face of Lita, Trish whipped her to the corner. She lifted Lita up and sat her on the turnbuckle, then ran to the opposite corner of the ring. She charged back to Lita’s corner, flipped onto her hands, and attempted a Stratusphere. However, Lita ducked, shoved Trish back to the mat, and jumped down off the turnbuckle.

Lita lifted Trish to her feet and caught her across the chest with a chop. She followed up with a forearm, which knocked Trish back into the corner. Lita continued to lace into Trish with chops, then pulled her out of the corner. However, Trish caught Lita with a forearm of her own, took her over with a snapmare, and applied a rear chinlock. As the fans stomped their feet and clapped their hands to support Lita, Trish squeezed her arm around her neck. However, Lita managed to get up, and with a series of elbow shots, she broke Trish’s grip. Trish was not to be denied, though; she immediately fired off a Chick Kick which caught Lita in the jaw. Trish pounced on her and made the cover, but somehow, Lita managed to kick out.

Trish lifted Lita up to her feet, then grabbed her around the head in bulldog position. She leapt up, planted her feet on the middle rope, and sprang off, but Lita threw her off of her head, blocking the Stratusfaction attempt. Trish quickly launched off another Chick Kick, but Lita ducked it, kicked Trish in the stomach, and hit the Twist of Fate. Lita climbed to the top turnbuckle and Moonsaulted off, landing on Trish. She stayed on for the cover, scoring the win at 9:02. As Robinson retrieved the WWE Women’s Title, Molly Holly ran out of the entranceway and into the ring. She kicked an unsuspecting Lita in the gut and drilled her with a DDT before grabbing the title belt from Robinson, holding it up, and tossing it on Lita.

Crowd: 69.5%

Match: 48.5%

Overall: 65.4%

Jim Ross: Lita picks up a big win, only to be ambushed by Molly Holly!

Jerry Lawler: Molly hasn’t been given a fair shake recently, J.R. When you think about it, she really did the right thing here.

Jim Ross: The right thing? Attacking someone after they’ve just wrestled a match is the right thing? Good grief!

Taking a Stand

Backstage, Jonathan Coachman is tailing Molly Holly, who is on her way out of the arena.

Jonathan Coachman: Molly, Molly!

Molly Holly turns around.

Jonathan Coachman: Molly, what could possess you to perpetrate such an attack on Lita, and just seconds after her successful title defense?

Molly Holly: What could possess me, Coach? That kind of attitude could possess me! For months, it’s been Lita and Trish, Lita and Trish, over and over, like they’re the only women in this company who matter! Well, guess what, Coach? I’m tired of being angry silently! I’m the top female wrestler on Raw! When I held the Women’s Title, it was the longest reign in years! I gave my body, my soul, and even my hair to that belt, Coach- too damn much to be ignored! I won’t stand for it anymore!

Finished, Molly turns and leaves.

Overall: 34.7%

Jerry Lawler: She’s right, J.R.! I’ve been saying for ages, “What about Molly?” Honestly, she’s one of the best Women’s Champions of all time!

Jim Ross: Thank you, Captain Front-Runner. Molly’s title aspirations are anything but certain after her heinous actions, I’ll bet.

A Final Word

Lita is in her locker room, holding her neck in pain. She has her Women’s Title on the bench beside her.

Kane: (from offscreen) Are you alright?

Lita jumps, a little startled. Kane walks onto the screen.

Lita: Yes. I’ll be fine.

Kane: Good.

Kane pauses awkwardly, then turns to leave.

Lita: Kane, wait.

He stops.

Lita: Did you get the papers?

Kane: Yes.

Lita: Will you sign them?

Kane: Yes.

Lita: Thank you… I appreciate it.

Kane turns to leave once again.

Lita: Kane-

He stops again and turns around. Lita gets up and stands in front of him.

Lita: Kane… I hate you…

Kane’s expression does not waver.

Lita: But tonight, Kane… I want you to kill Gene Snitsky.

Kane nods and leaves.

Overall: 54.0%

Jim Ross: Kane and Lita are on the same page tonight!

Kane versus Gene Snitsky

Kane and Gene Snitsky collided in the ring like two angry animals, both throwing punches at whatever they could hit. Kane gained the upper hand, backing Snitsky into the ropes and continuing to unleash fists upon him. Kane grabbed Snitsky by the throat and started choking him, then pulled him out into the center of the ring. Kane relinquished his grip, only to catch Snitsky in the throat with an underhand chop. Snitsky reeled back, allowing Kane to nail him in the chest with a high kick. As soon as Snitsky hit the mat, Kane pounced on him and continued the punch-based assault. When Kane finally got off of Gene Snitsky, Snitsky was bleeding from the forehead.

Kane grabbed Snitsky by the hair and lifted him up to his feet. Snitsky managed to retaliate with a few punches, but Kane simply shrugged them off. Still holding Snitsky by the hair, Kane flung him over the top rope and to the arena floor. As Kane jumped down after him, Snitsky nailed the Big Red Machine with a low blow. He then grabbed Kane’s arm and whipped him back first into the steel ring steps. Kane grimaced in pain, but when Gene Snitsky charged in with a knee, Kane was able to dart out of the way, causing Snitsky to collide with (and flip over) the steps.

Despite the impact of his collision with the steps, Gene Snitsky managed to get to his feet and roll back into the ring. Meanwhile, Kane shoved timekeeper Mark Yeaton off of his chair, grabbed it, and brought it into the ring with him. As Snitsky got to his feet, Kane lifted the chair, but Snitsky ducked and punched him in the gut, causing Kane to drop the chair. Snitsky grabbed Kane by the throat, and after yelling “It wasn’t my fault!” he nailed Kane with a Chokeslam. Snitsky followed up with the cover, but Kane was able to kick out of his own maneuver.

Snitsky staggered to his feet, then grabbed Kane by the head and lifted him up. He wrapped his hand around Kane’s throat once again, but broke the hold with a forearm. He grabbed Snitsky’s arm and whipped him into the ropes, then caught him with a big boot as he came back. Kane hesitated for a moment, then headed out onto the apron. He climbed up to the top turnbuckle and perched there, waiting for Snitsky to rise. When he did, Kane leapt off and connected with a flying clothesline. Snitsky hit the mat hard, and Kane followed up with a cover. However, he only scored a two count.

Kane lifted Snitsky by the head and pulled him over to the ropes. Kane walked out onto the apron, still holding Snitsky’s head, then jumped down to the floor, executing a guillotine on Snitsky. Kane laughed as Gene Snitsky writhed in pain, then rubbed his blood-covered hands together. He rolled back into the ring and stomped on Snitsky, then pulled him to his feet and hung him on the turnbuckle in the Tree of Woe. Kane backed up, then charged into Snitsky, ramming him in the gut with a knee. Snitsky collapsed to the mat, only to have Kane pull him up again. With his eyes glazed and his face and chest dripping with blood, Snitsky took a short arm clothesline from the Big Red Machine.

Without taking a moment’s rest, Kane drove both of his hands into Snitsky’s face and simply tore at it, shredding skin and damaging eyes as Gene Snitsky screamed. Kane got to his feet, lifted his hand, and spread his fingers, indicating that he was gearing up for the Chokeslam. Sure enough, when Snitsky got up, Kane grabbed his throat, lifted him in the air, and drove him to the mat with a Chokeslam. Kane signaled for the Tombstone, then waited for Snitsky to get back to his feet. It took several moments, but when he did, Kane scooped him up, delivered the Tombstone, and pinned Snitsky at 13:36. Immediately thereafter, Kane pulled Snitsky up, lifted him, and sent him to hell with another Tombstone Piledriver.

Crowd: 76.1%

Match: 63.6%

Overall: 74.6%

Jim Ross: What a brutal, violent, bloody match!

Jerry Lawler: Match? That was a massacre, J.R.! Kane destroyed Snitsky!

Jim Ross: I don’t care if I ever see Kane again, but I have to admit, justice was served tonight.

Last-Minute Ambush

William Regal is backstage in his locker room, shadowboxing. A knock is heard at his door.

William Regal: Come in.

The door swings open and La Resistance bursts in. Robert Conway tackles Regal, taking him down to the floor, then punches him repeatedly. Meanwhile, Sylvan Grenier laces into Regal with stomp after stomp. Regal manages to push Conway off, then he gets to his feet. He clocks Grenier in the jaw with a left hand, then turns around to face Robert Conway, but Conway nails Regal with a low blow. Regal collapses back to floor and Conway slaps on a camel clutch. While he cinches in the hold, Grenier slaps him in the face.

Sylvan Grenier: Get ready to lose zose titles tonight, you filthy, limey pig!

Robert Conway: Grrrr… you and your moron friend aren’t walkin’ out of here under your own power!

Grenier slaps Regal again.

Sylvan Grenier: Un du Canada!

Grenier slaps him a third time.

Sylvan Grenier: Et un du Québec!

Robert Conway: You tell him, Sylvan!

Conway releases the hold in order to drive a knee into Regal’s back, then reapplies it. Grenier gets in Regal’s face and begins to sing “O Canada” in French. Finally, Conway gets off of Regal.

Robert Conway: Let’s go, man. We’ve cashed our insurance policy!

Sylvan Grenier: And ze NEW World Tag Team Champions!

Overall: 70.0%

Jim Ross: I don’t believe it, that match is next! How is Regal going to be able to participate?

Jerry Lawler: He won’t! I gotta hand it to La Resistance, though- I’m not big fans of theirs, but what a great plan! Get in, do the damage, and get out- and so close to curtain time, too!

Jim Ross: Shameful! We’ve got Coach backstage with Randy Orton- hopefully, we can get Regal some help before he has to go out there.

Unshakable Confidence

Jonathan Coachman is standing backstage with Randy Orton.

Jonathan Coachman: Randy Orton, in a little while, you’ll be taking part in the six man Elimination Chamber for the vacant World Heavyweight Title. How do you think things will shape up?

Randy Orton: Coach, Coach, why the long face? Why such a glum attitude? This is 2005, we’re on Pay-Per-View! Lighten up, show a smile!

Jonathan Coachman: Alright, Randy, now-

Randy Orton: I said smile, Coach.

Coachman forces an uneasy smile.

Randy Orton: On second thought, don’t ever do that again. But let’s get to the point. Elimination Chamber, six men in, only one man can win. And I don’t know where I’ll be entering, but it won’t be in that coveted final spot. Careers have been shortened and champions have been hospitalized in that cage. But Coach, Randy Orton doesn’t sweat it. I may have been robbed of the World Heavyweight Championship, but I’m getting it back. Tonight, the “Legend Killer” gets a five for one discount.

Overall: 79.0%

Jerry Lawler: Who does he think he is, J.R.?

Jim Ross: He could be the next World Heavyweight Champion!

Jerry Lawler: Not with Triple H in there!

WWE World Tag Team Championship Match: William Regal and Eugene © versus La Resistance

Things did not look favorable for the World Tag Team Champions heading into this match. Eugene had to help William Regal down the aisle, and then had to carry him up to the ring apron. Naturally, it was Eugene who started the match, dodging a grapple attempt by Sylvan Grenier and grabbing him with a waistlock. Eugene lifted Grenier, then slammed him down to the mat. As soon as Grenier hit the canvas, Eugene grabbed his arm and applied a hammerlock. As Sylvan Grenier cried out in pain, Eugene released the hold, spun around to Grenier’s head, and applied a front facelock. Grenier managed to get up to his feet, but Eugene pulled him back down to the mat. Somewhat nervous, he looked over his shoulder to check the status of his tag team partner; what he saw was far from encouraging, as Regal was struggling to keep himself propped up against the turnbuckle.

Nevertheless, Eugene managed to keep Grenier immobilized, punctuating the front facelock with the occasion elbow to the back of the challenger. However, Grenier finally managed to extricate himself by grabbing Eugene, running with him, and driving him back first into the turnbuckle. Taking advantage of his momentary dominance, Sylvan Grenier pushed Eugene back into the corner and began chopping him across the chest. Sylvan got too cocky, however, and after waiting too long to throw a chop, Eugene darted out of the corner, grabbed the challenger, and threw him against the turnbuckle. Eugene fired off a few chops of his own, yelling “Whooo” along with the crowd after each one. He then turned around and imitated the “Nature Boy” strut, giving Grenier the opportunity to scurry to his corner and make the tag to Robert Conway. Conway charged straight for Eugene, but the World Tag Team Champion used his superb agility to take Conway over with a Steamboat-esque armdrag.

Conway got to his feet, but Eugene kept him in an armlock. Conway tried to break free, but he could only get Eugene to relinquish the hold after a very illegal eye poke. Referee Charles Robinson admonished Conway, but the advantage was still his. He threw a low dropkick and connected with Eugene’s knee, sending the champion to the mat in pain. As Sylvan Grenier shouted words of encouragement, Conway lifted Eugene up, grabbed his leg, and took him over with a Dragon Screw Legwhip. He kept his grip on Eugene’s right leg, and while the champion lay on the floor, Conway simply kicked away at his leg. Conway stopped kicking in order to attempt to apply a Figure Four Leglock, but as he stepped around, Eugene pushed him off with his other foot. Conway shot forward, bounced off the ropes, and came back, allowing Eugene to roll him up for two.

Both Conway and Eugene managed to get to their feet, but Eugene had trouble putting weight on his bad leg. William Regal had also achieved a standing base, and he was alternating between clapping and holding his neck. Conway grabbed Eugene by the arm and attempted a short-arm clothesline, but Eugene ducked, grabbed Conway in a waistlock, and rolled him up. He scored a long two count, but Conway kicked out.

Both men got up again, but this time, Conway was quick in his attack. He caught Eugene in the side of the knee with a kick, then scooped up his leg with an amateur-style hook. With little alternative, Eugene threw an enziguri, damaging himself as well as Robert Conway. With the energy he could muster, he pushed himself up, crawled over to his corner, and tagged William Regal. For the first time in twelve minutes, Regal got into the match. Still grimacing in pain, he charged into Conway and caught him in the chest with a high knee. Sylvan Grenier got into the ring and ran at Regal, but Regal took him over with a hiptoss that ended with a brutal landing against the turnbuckle.

Regal balled his fists and shouted in anger, driving the crowd into a frenzy. As Conway got to his feet, Regal caught him with a dropkick, sending him to the mat. Grenier had managed to get back to his corner, and Conway tried to tag out to him, but Regal caught dropped a knee on him before he could reach. William Regal pulled Robert Conway to his feet, but Conway caught him with a kick and followed with a bodyslam. The pain of the assault rushed back to Regal, immobilizing him on the mat. Meanwhile, Conway tagged Grenier, who rushed in, dropped an elbow on Regal, and applied a draining side headlock. It was Eugene’s turn to clap, which gave Regal the drive to get to his knees, throw Grenier off, scamper to the corner, and make the tag.

Eugene jumped into the ring and pointed at Grenier, who shrunk back. Grenier tried to jump out of the ring, but Eugene caught him by the trunks, pulled him back in, whipped him, and caught him with a backdrop as he bounced back. Conway charged the ring, but Eugene kicked him in the gut and nailed him with a Stone Cold Stunner. As Grenier got to his feet, Eugene grabbed him around the shoulder and gave him the Rock Bottom. The People’s Elbow followed, and Eugene pinned Grenier at 17:51.

Crowd: 71.9%

Match: 66.4%

Overall: 72.9%

Jim Ross: What a win! The World Tag Team Champions pick up the win shorthanded!

Jerry Lawler: What bull, J.R.! Maybe if they stopped Eugene from stealing other people’s moves, we’d start to see the talent rise to the top!

The Awakening

The camera cuts to a vignette; the screen is completely black. Words begin to appear in white lettering. First, we see “OUR CONCEPTS OF EXCELLENCE WILL BE CHALLENGED.” Those words are replaced by “OUR NOTIONS OF PERFECTION WILL BE SURPASSED.” They disappear, and are followed by “OUR IDEAS ABOUT GREATNESS WILL BE REDEFINED.” When they fade, they are replaced by “AND SHE WILL CAUSE THIS AWAKENING.” For a split-second, the screen shows a white outline of beautiful, exotic eyes, then goes black.

Overall: 0.0%

Jim Ross: Well, that’s puzzling. Who could “she” be?

Jerry Lawler: I don’t know, but I’ll tell you this, J.R.: if “she” wants to make it in WWE, she’ll have a difficult road ahead!

Jim Ross: No doubt about that, King. Fans, before our main event, I just gotta remind you, the next time we’ll be on Pay-Per-View will be January 30th, at the 17th annual Royal Rumble. The big 30-man Royal Rumble match will take place, with the winner going to the main event of WrestleMania XXI.

Jerry Lawler: The Royal Rumble, J.R.! It’s the most exciting, unpredictable hour of wrestling every year!

Jim Ross: You said it, King, but as far as unpredictable and exciting goes, it may have to compete with the Elimination Chamber, coming up right now.

Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Championship: Triple H versus Batista versus Chris Benoit versus Edge versus Chris Jericho versus Randy Orton, Special Guest Referee Shawn Michaels

Through a random selection, it was determined that Edge and Chris Jericho would start the match, and so they did. After circling each other cautiously, the two men involved in the decision of Raw’s main event locked up. Jericho managed to grab a headlock, but Edge shoved him off. They stared each other down for a second, then grappled again. This time, Edge applied a wristlock. Jericho rolled to the mat and flipped over onto his feet, reversing the wristlock into one of his own. He grabbed Edge around the head again, then took him over to the canvas. However, Edge managed to wrap his legs around Jericho’s head and pull Y2J off. Still stuck between Edge’s legs, Jericho flipped over onto his opponent, covering him. Edge kicked out at two, and both men quickly got to their feet.

Edge went for another grapple, but Jericho countered with a kick to his gut. He followed up with a chop, blistering Edge’s chest. Edge toppled Jericho with a double leg takedown, then got to a knee and fired right hand after right hand into Y2J’s forehead. He pulled Jericho up and whipped him into the ropes, then attempted a clothesline as he came back. However, Jericho ducked it, stopped short, and nailed Edge in the back of the head with a jumping back kick. He came down across Edge’s back with a senton, then grabbed his arm and rolled him up with a magistral cradle. Edge kicked out after two, but Jericho retained the advantage, laying into his opponent with stomps. Just then, the buzzer sounded, indicating that five minutes had passed. With a flashing of lights, Triple H’s cell door slid open.

Triple H charged out of his holding pen and hit Jericho with a brutal shoulder tackle. As Edge lay on the mat, Triple H lifted Jericho to his feet and gave him a devastating side backbreaker. With Jericho down on the canvas, Triple H jumped up in the air and dropped a knee across his forehead. When The Game got back to his feet, he turned around and walked directly into a right hand from Edge. Edge hammered away on Triple H, whipped him to the ropes, then caught him with a backdrop as he returned. Edge grabbed Triple H by the head and tried to suplex him, but the former nine-time World Champion blocked the attempt. Triple H tried a suplex of his own, but Edge also prevented it from happening. At that point, Chris Jericho got to his feet. He, too, grabbed Edge around the head, and he and Triple H took him over with a suplex.

Triple H then lifted Edge to his feet. He held him up by the hair as Chris Jericho climbed to the top turnbuckle. Jericho came off with a Missile Dropkick, but Edge managed to pull Triple H into harm’s way and Jericho kicked him, instead. Jericho, not bothered by the error, sent Edge flying with a monkey flip, then covered Triple H. The Game managed to kick out as the buzzer sounded again. Ten minutes had elapsed, and so the lights flashed. This time, Randy Orton was released from his section of the Elimination Chamber.

Randy Orton made a beeline for Triple H, though Chris Jericho got in the way and Orton had to take him down with a charging forearm. When he reached Triple H, Orton dropped an elbow on him. He shouted for Triple H to get up, and when The Game did, Orton threw a punch. With Randy Orton working over a dazed Triple H, Edge got to his feet and lifted up Chris Jericho. Edge swung at him, but Jericho ducked, grabbed him from behind, and gave him a belly to back suplex. He floated over into the cover, but Edge managed to kick out.

Meanwhile, Randy Orton continued to punch away at Triple H. However, The Game turned the tide by ramming the side of his knee into Orton’s stomach. He grabbed Orton by the arm and attempted to whip him into a vacant cell, but Orton reversed the maneuver. Triple H went flying into the pen, his head smashing through the glass pane. Orton went to help Jericho beat on Edge in the corner while Triple H managed to drag himself back into the ring.

With Jericho calling the shots, he and Orton each placed a hand under an armpit of Edge. They bealed him out of the corner together, then Jericho immediately pulled Orton’s legs out from under him. As the fifteen-minute buzzer sounded, Chris Jericho attempted to place Orton in the Walls of Jericho. Of course, it was Chris Benoit’s turn to be released. He grabbed Jericho by the waist, pulled him off of Orton, and gave him a German Suplex, complete with a bridge. Shawn Michaels immediately made the count, but Jericho kicked out after two.

Benoit got to his feet and pulled Orton up by the hair. As he was about to strike, Benoit was hit in the back with a forearm from a very bloody Triple H. Benoit spun around and chopped Triple H across the chest, sending him staggering back. He bumped into Edge, who had gotten to his feet, and caught a punch from him. He stumbled out to the center of the ring, where Jericho, who had gotten to his feet, kicked him in the gut. He was knocked back into Randy Orton, who grabbed him by the head and delivered the RKO. Before he could make the cover, Benoit pounced on Triple H and put him in the Crippler Crossface. After approximately fifteen seconds, Triple H tapped out. He became the first elimination at 18:46.

Edge, ever the opportunist, immediately jumped on Benoit and applied a Crippler Crossface of his own. As Benoit struggled to get to the ropes, Jericho nailed Orton with an enziguri kick. Once again, Jericho attempted to apply the Walls on Orton, only this time, he was successful. Michaels managed to monitor both submission moves, and both Benoit and Orton finally reached the ropes. Just then, the match reached the twenty-minute mark, and the buzzer sounded one final time. With flashing lights, Batista’s cell opened, and the monster of Evolution was unleashed into the Elimination Chamber.

Batista charged in and nearly kicked Chris Jericho’s head off with a big boot. As Chris Benoit pulled himself to his feet, Batista grabbed him, lifted him over his head, and tossed him on the steel panel between the cage and the ropes. However, when Batista turned around, he was met with a European Uppercut from Randy Orton. Orton kicked the big man in the gut, grabbed him by the arm, and attempted a whip. Batista reversed, though, sending Orton to the ropes. Orton bounced back as Batista threw a clothesline, but Orton ducked and took him to the mat with a backslide. Batista’s excessive strength allowed him to kick out after only a one count. He got back up and took a dropkick from Orton, which only served to stagger Batista. Edge, who had been regaining his strength in the corner, stuck up behind Orton, hit him with a low blow, and rolled him up, but Orton kicked out after a long two count.

Orton and Edge got to their feet, but were immediately knocked to the mat after a double clothesline from Batista. Meanwhile, Chris Benoit rolled back into the ring under the bottom rope. Batista went after him, but Chris Jericho took the big man down with a bulldog. Jericho ran to the perpendicular set of ropes and sprang off, hitting a Lionsault on Batista. He hooked the leg and made the cover, but Batista managed to kick out. Chris Jericho got back to his feet, but Benoit grabbed him around the waist and gave him a German Suplex. He held on, pulled Jericho back up, and gave him another one. Benoit pulled Jericho up again, and braced himself for the final suplex, but Batista grabbed him from behind, and in an amazing show of strength, gave both Jericho and Benoit a release German Suplex.

As Batista got back up, Randy Orton caught him in the head with a knee. He nailed the big man in the face with a forearm, but Batista halted Orton’s offense with a kick to the gut. He lifted Randy Orton up for the Demon Bomb, but Orton broke loose by punching him in the face. Orton landed on his feet and without a moment’s hesistation, drilled Batista with the RKO. Orton followed up with the cover and made the pin, eliminating Batista at 28:01.

Edge, who had gotten back to his feet, grabbed Orton’s shoulder and spun him around. He caught Orton in the jaw with a punch, but the “Legend Killer” fired back with one of his own. Edge grabbed Orton and whipped him to the corner, then charged in with a running back elbow. However, Orton dodged it, and Edge hit the ringpost. Orton grabbed him by the head and went for the RKO, but Edge grabbed the top rope and held on, causing Orton to fall to the mat. Edge dove on Orton and, with his own feet on the bottom rope, made the cover. Still, Orton managed to kick out.

Edge got to his feet and stomped away on Orton, cursing him all the while. Suddenly, he was grabbed from behind by Chris Jericho. Jericho ran him into the ropes, then rolled back, bridging into a cover. This time, it was Edge’s turn to kick out. When he popped up, Jericho kicked him in the gut and crushed him with a double underhook backbreaker. While that was happening, Benoit pulled Randy Orton away from the ropes, grabbed his legs, and started to apply the Sharpshooter. However, when Benoit leaned forward, Orton grabbed him by the head and rolled him up. Benoit kicked out, then rammed a boot between Orton’s shoulder blades. He followed up by applying a surfboard.

Chris Jericho grabbed Edge around the legs, lifted him up, and sat him down on the top turnbuckle. He punched Edge in the face twice for good measure, then climbed up the ringpost himself. He hooked his arm around Edge’s head, then grabbed the waist of his tights with his other hand. As Orton got to his feet and broke loose from Benoit’s surfboard, Jericho superplexed Edge over in one powerful motion. Orton grabbed Benoit around the head, then suplexed him directly onto Edge. Benoit rolled off and Orton covered him. Simultaneously, Jericho hooked Edge’s leg in a cover. Shawn Michaels made two separate counts for the two separate covers, but both Benoit and Edge managed to kick out.

Edge staggered back to his feet, grabbing the ropes for support. Orton charged at him, but Edge countered with a backdrop, sending Orton flying into the chain wall of the Elimination Chamber. Edge went out after him, grabbed Orton’s head, and squeezed his face against the chains. While Chris Benoit got to his feet, Chris Jericho bounced off the ropes, ran across the ring, and launched himself at Edge. Edge ducked at the last moment, and Jericho crashed into Orton. When Jericho fell to the floor, Edge picked him up, set him up between his legs, lifted him, and drove him into the steel with a brutal Piledriver. Edge rolled Jericho under the bottom rope and back into the ring, then followed after him. Edge made the cover and pinned Chris Jericho at 39:02.

Chris Benoit, who had been regaining his energy, came up behind Edge, grabbed him by the arm, and attempted to put him in the Crippler Crossface. Once again, Edge managed to retain a standing base by gripping the top rope with all his might. Benoit struggled to bring Edge to the canvas, but he remained unable. Randy Orton, still on the steel paneling, pulled himself up by the ropes. He threw a punch, but Edge managed to yank the rope, spin around, and pull Benoit into the trajectory of Orton’s fist. Benoit was knocked off of Edge, who grabbed a surprised Orton around the torso and gave him an overhead belly to belly suplex back into the ring. Edge covered Orton with a jackknife hold, placing both of his own heels on the bottom rope for added pressure. Shawn Michaels did not see Edge’s infraction, and made the three count, eliminating Randy Orton at 41:17.

Finally, the match boiled down to Edge and Chris Benoit, two men who had been at each other’s throats for months. Benoit, still fifteen minutes fresher than Edge, laced into his opponent with his signature chops, sending Edge reeling into the corner. Benoit climbed the turnbuckle and turned his chops to punches, but Edge grabbed him by the legs, ran him out into the center of the ring, and dropped him to the mat, almost in a modified Spinebuster. Edge simply collapsed onto Benoit, forcing Michaels to make the count. Benoit, for his part, managed to kick out.

Edge stumbled to his feet, then fell back against the ringpost. After taking few moments to catch his breath, he walked out to the cetner of the ring and bent down to lift Benoit to his feet. However, he got the shock of a lifetime as the Canadian Crippler grabbed his arm and wrenched him down to the mat. Edge struggled, but this time, there were no ropes to grab. Benoit pulled Edge’s arm between his legs and clasped his hands around his head, completing the Crippler Crossface. With an intense gleam in his eye, Benoit wrenched back on the hold, causing Edge to scream in pain. Edge planted his hand on the mat and slowly managed to pull himself forward. He inched closer and closer to the bottom rope as Benoit pulled at his face. When Edge’s fingertips were only a few inches from the ropes, Benoit rolled back, retaining the Crossface and repositioning himself in the center of the ring.

Benoit continued to pull back with the hold, giving the illusion that Edge’s head was only moments away from touching the small of his back. His screams grew dimmer and dimmer, but still, he did not tap out. In fact, when Shawn Michaels asked Edge if he gave up, Edge defiantly gave him the finger with his spare hand. Though it seemed impossible, Benoit pulled back even further, bending Edge’s spine to grotesque proportions. Finally, Benoit released the hold, as it was clear that Edge would not tap. Benoit instead climbed to the top turnbuckle. As Edge continued to scream, Benoit came off with a Diving Headbutt. He connected with the move and covered Edge. Michaels made the three count, giving Chris Benoit the victory and his second World Heavyweight Championship at 48:26. Michaels fetched the belt and handed it to Benoit, who climbed triumphantly to all four turnbuckles.

Crowd: 94.2%

Match: 70.8%

Overall: 27.1%

Jim Ross: BENOIT! BENOIT! BENOIT! WHAT A NIGHT! WHAT A MATCH! CHRIS BENOIT IS THE NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!

Jerry Lawler: I don’t believe it, J.R.! He destroyed Edge! He outlasted everybody!

Jim Ross: All the credit in the world to Edge, one of the toughest S.O.B.s I’ve ever seen, but inside Chris Benoit beats the heart of a champion!

Jerry Lawler: I’ll… I’ll agree with you, J.R.! Just like he says, Benoit is for real!

Jim Ross: You’re damn straight he is! For Jerry Lawler, this is Jim Ross! We’ll see you tomorrow night on Raw!

Show Rating: 62.7

Edited January 29, 2005 by Scott Boulder Fried

[Cole]

Benoit! 2 Time 2 Time! I mark out for Canadian champs!!!

[Boulder]

January 9, 2005

Not bad.

Not great, but not bad.

I sat back in my easy chair as my Pay-Per-View provider informed me that in twelve minutes, the replay of New Year’s Revolution would begin. I shut the television. I had caught it the first time, and I was, by and large, happy with the results. The ball was rolling, Rome wasn’t built in a day, et cetera.

I still had some business ahead of me before I could hit the hay- namely, I had to get packed up for my Raw/Smackdown two-day trip. As I’d be spending much of my next two days in transit, I’d have plenty of time to prepare my statements for the crew, both the wrestlers and non-wrestlers. However, I was still a bit nervous.

I was pulled out of my apprehension by the low humming of my cell phone. Not only did I not recognize the number, but I didn’t recognize the area code, either.

“Hello?”

“Hi,” came the voice at the other end. “Scott Fried?”

“Yeah,” I said.

“Hi, this is Jerry Lawler.”

“Oh, hi,” I told him. “Sorry we haven’t a chance to touch base yet, but I’ll be at the show tomorrow.”

“Um, that’s okay,” he said. Though I had never spoken to Lawler before, he was exhibiting a tenseness which I could only imagine was uncharacteristic.

“Is something wrong?” I asked.

“Well, not wrong,” he said. “I… I think I’d like to tender my resignation.”

I was stunned. “What? Why?”

“Well,” he explained. “I was keeping it under wraps, but this morning I met with Victor Quinones. We finalized a deal to make me head booker of IWA: Puerto Rico.”

“Wow. Well, uh, congratulations.”

“I’m real sorry about this. I liked the way the Pay-Per-View went down tonight, it would’ve been nice to see where everything heads. I just couldn’t turn this down.”

“I understand,” I told him. “When do you start working for Quinones?”

“Tomorrow,” he said hesitantly. Yeesh, talk about not having a whole lot of time to fix things up.

“Fair enough,” I said. “Thanks for all of your time with World Wrestling Entertainment, King. Good luck.”

“Thanks,” he said. “I gotta go, the boys are throwing me a little party.”

“Alright, take care.”

I hung up the phone, optimism and surprise battling for emotional supremacy within me.

[JustinCredible2k]

My Gosh. This is an awesome diary Thus far. Keep it churning.

[Cole]

Nice... I like the updates you really write well...the shows and matches are good too.

I'm wondering to see where you'll go with Benoit...it should be intersting

[shamelessposer]

I'm not a hundred percent sure on your characterization of a couple of wrestlers, but you have NAILED Ric Flair.

Pretty awesome booking, too.

[Boulder]

I'm not a hundred percent sure on your characterization of a couple of wrestlers, but you have NAILED Ric Flair.

←

Worry not, I bought him dinner first.

Thanks for all the replies, everyone. I think my biggest characterization problem so far has been that I've played Jericho up as too serious. I'll try to work in more of his usual, fun-loving self.

Raw should hopefully be up by Monday.

[Boulder]

January 10, 2005

I cleared my throat as I stood in the arena, facing nearly one hundred of the Raw roster’s administrators, writers, and wrestlers. Though a face or two was familiar from my time as head booker of WCW a decade before, I was, by and large, faced with a room of strangers.

“Well,” I said, “this is, of course, an unusual situation. But don’t be afraid to talk to me, to contact me, whatever. I’m not your boss, persay. Just the new booker, and as I’m more familiar with the wrestling industry than some of my predecessors, I think most of you will find that things will run more smoothly.”

Some of the boys nodded. Others didn’t.

“With that in mind,” I continued, “I really want each and every one of you to make sure that your voice is heard. During the show, I’ll tape a piece of paper to the door of my office. If you want to talk to me, just write your name on the paper. We’ll do one every week, and I’ll meet with whomever signs up tonight after Raw next week.”

The room was silent. Everybody seemed a bit surprised.

“That’s all for now,” I told them. “Thank you very much.”

WWE Monday Night Raw

January 10, 2005

Jim Ross: Welcome to Monday Night Raw! What a night last night was, fans! We saw a brutal Elimination Chamber match and a new World Heavyweight Champion in Chris Benoit! I’m Jim Ross, and joining me is my new broadcast partner, Al Snow!

Al Snow: Good to be here, Jimbo. It’s about time some new blood got a chance to speak.

Jim Ross: Well, the jury is still out on you being “new blood,” Al, but regardless, we can expect to see some fallout from New Year’s Revolution tonight. However, I have been told that due to the nature of last night’s Elimination Chamber match, all six participants are at home recuperating, and none of them will be with us tonight.

Al Snow: When I think about Triple H’s head going through that pane of glass, or Edge nailing Chris Jericho with the Piledriver on that steel, I don’t question their absence for a second!

Back in the Swing of Things

Jim Ross and Al Snow are interrupted as Shawn Michaels’s music hits the loudspeakers. The crowd goes nuts as the Heartbreak Kid heads to the ring, a microphone in his hand.

Jim Ross: Looks like things are starting off in a big way tonight!

Shawn Michaels: What’s up, Fort Lauderdale?

The crowd goes nuts in response.

Shawn Michaels: That’s what I thought! Now I hope that you all got to New Year’s Revolution last night, and I hope you got to see ol’ HBK back in this squared circle! But you know there’s no way that the Heartbreak Kid is satisfied as a referee. I’ve gotta be the center of attention!

Al Snow: Ain’t that the truth!

Shawn Michaels: Now that I’ve got this knee back in gear, I’m in fightin’ shape! I’m more than ready to mix it up with the best that Raw has to offer, so on that note… I’ve gone and made the calls, talked to the higher-ups, had brunch with Bischoff, and- I might as well just come out and say it- I’m in the Royal Rumble!

Jim Ross: What an announcement! Michaels is a two-time Rumble winner! He’s gotta be a favorite for this match!

Shawn Michaels: January 30th, boys and girls, HBK wins a third Rumble-

Shawn Michaels is cut off as Christian’s music begins to play. He walks out onto the stage with a microphone.

Jim Ross: Gimme a break! Can’t he just let a legend speak?

Al Snow: Take it easy, J.R.! How do future legends get born? They grab opportunity by the shorthairs!

Christian: Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah! You never stop talking, Shawn! But I guess that makes sense, since you injure yourself every time you wrestle!

Shawn Michaels: Good to see you, too, Christian! And I’m glad to see that those suppositories aren’t causing irritability!

Christian: Oh, really funny, Shawn! If you prefer snide remarks to titles and victories, be my guest, but if you think you’re gonna win the Royal Rumble, you don’t have a clue! On January 30th, there’ll be one Royal Rumble winner, one number one contender, and it’ll be Captain Charisma!

Shawn Michaels: And he says I talk too much! Listen, C.L.B., if you think you can handle me, why not find out tonight? You and me, in this ring!

Christian: Well… I-

Shawn Michaels: No! No backtracking! You wrote a check, now cash it!

Christian: Fine! Fine! You want it, Michaels? You got me, tonight! Get ready, because I’m bringing it all!

Shawn Michaels: Don’t bring any less, kid!

Overall: 84.4%

Jim Ross: What a main event match for tonight, folks! Christian versus Shawn Michaels! HBK versus the C.L.B.!

Al Snow: Keep the comedy coming, J.R.

Victoria versus Molly Holly

Molly Holly was dominant throughout the match, taking it to Victoria with offense ranging from devastating suplexes to clawing fingernails. Victoria, for her part, managed to fight back, flooring Molly with a dropkick and scoring a long two count off of a standing moonsault. Nevertheless, Molly was able to get back in the match, smashing Victoria in the center of the ring with a pancake, then following up with a gut-wrench suplex. Victoria tried to turn the tide with a rollup, but this mostly served to anger Molly. She gave Victoria a Samoan Drop, then locked on a Rear Naked Choke. Victoria was close enough to grab the bottom rope, but Molly would not release the hold. Finally, referee Chad Patton had to disqualify Molly Holly at 7:03. She kept the hold locked in until Lita ran down, pulled her off, and spiked her with a DDT, giving her a taste of her own medicine.

Crowd: 50.1%

Match: 51.4%

Overall: 53.3%

Al Snow: Lita’s tough, J.R., but Molly’s mean! If these two have a showdown, my former broadcast colleague may have to kiss her title goodbye!

Jim Ross: Let’s just hope Molly plays by the rules. Well, up next, we’ve got two of my favorite folks in the whole world, The Coach and Muhammad Hassan, backstage for an interview. Hassan’s making his in-ring debut tonight.

An Auspicious Beginning

Jonathan Coachman is standing backstage with Muhammad Hassan and Khosrow Daivari.

Jonathan Coachman: Thanks, J.R., and let me just add, nobody wears those extra holiday pounds quite like you. But back to the topic at hand, Muhammad Hassan, tonight you will be making your in-ring debut here in World Wrestling Entertainment, and against a veteran, Val Venis. What are your thoughts?

Muhammad Hassan: The time for thoughts has come and gone, Coach. If this game, if this country, was about thoughts, we’d live in a happier place. It’s time to turn to action, and to fight fire with fire. Tonight, I’m going to show the entire world that I’m more than a voice. And anyone who gets in my way is going to find out just how serious I am.

Khosrow Daivari translates Hassan’s speech into Persian.

Overall: 51.0%

Al Snow: Wow, Hassan may be a rookie, but Val Venis ought to watch himself, huh, J.R.?

Jim Ross: Val, if you’re listening, teach this kid some manners!

Al Snow: Alright, Jimbo, keep it together.

Plans for the Evening

A limousine is pulling up in the parking garage. When it stops, the chauffeur gets out, walks to the back, and opens the door. With an unusually somber look on his face, Ric Flair gets out of the car. As he walks across the lot, Eric Bischoff intercepts him.

Eric Bischoff: Where the hell have you been?

Ric Flair: Where have I been? Listen, buddy, Triple H and Batista are laid up after last night. It was damn near all they could do to get on the plane out of Puerto Rico!

Eric Bischoff: Do I look like I care? Your buddies got into the match, they knew what they were doing. But forget it, Flair. Don’t change the subject. You’re mine for Raw, when it’s over, you can go back to the hotel and change Triple H’s Band-Aids.

Flair glares angrily at Bischoff, but the General Manager doesn’t budge.

Eric Bischoff: Evolution doesn’t call the shots around here anymore, “Nature Boy.” Now if I were you, I’d take off that Armani suit and slip into my trunks. You’ve got Rhyno tonight!

Ric Flair: Rhyno?!?

Bischoff walks away, leaving Flair by himself.

Ric Flair: Jeez… Rhyno?

Overall: 76.1%

Jim Ross: Flair versus Rhyno! The Man-Beast versus The Nature Boy!

Al Snow: Wait, wait, wait, J.R., listen to this… you listening?

Jim Ross: I’m listening.

Al Snow: The Gore versus the Figure-Four! Huh? Huh?

Jim Ross: Very nice, Al. How long have we been a broadcast team? It’s gotta be six months by now.

Al Snow: Har, har, har, Jim. Leave the jokes to me.

Muhammad Hassan versus Val Venis

Though not American himself, Val Venis seemed to take exception to Hassan’s comments over the past few weeks, as he was quick to try and rip into the newcomer. However, Muhammad Hassan used his size and strength advantage to fend Venis off, and used his skill to surprise the veteran. With a big dropkick, Hassan knocked Venis to the mat, then immediately scored a knee drop and a two count. Venis soon took control after ducking a crossbody. He followed up with a Fisherman’s Suplex for two, then went up top. He came off with the Money Shot, but Hassan rolled out of the way, causing Venis to smash against the canvas. Without a moment’s hesitation, Muhammad Hassan got to his feet, pulled Venis up, lifted him for a powerbomb, and slammed him down on his knee. Following that vicious, innovative maneuver, Hassan made the cover. Referee Jack Doan registered the three count at 8:19.

Crowd: 53.0%

Match: 58.0%

Overall: 54.9%

Al Snow: What a match! What a move! You’ve gotta admit, Jimmy, Hassan showed a lot of promise!

Jim Ross: It ain’t a matter of admission, Al; Hassan was impressive. I just don’t like the guy’s attitude!

The Awakening, Part II

The screen goes black, but once again, white letters appear and form the following lines, each replacing the one before it:

“LIMITS ARE MEANINGLESS”

“THEY ARE TOOLS CREATED BY MAN TO EXPLAIN FAILURE”

“THEY ARE INVITATIONS FOR MAN TO ACCEPT INADEQUACY”

“THEY ARE FUEL FOR MAN TO GROW COMPLACENT”

“SHE HAS NO USE FOR THEM”

After the last line disappears, the same pair of beautiful, exotic eyes appear for a fraction of a second. When they vanish, the screen remains black.

Overall: 0.0%

Jim Ross: I’m starting to wonder who “she” is, I can tell you that much.

Al Snow: Jim, if there’s one thing I’ve learned here, it’s that all things reveal themselves eventually- some through enlightenment, some through betrayal, and some through pain.

Jim Ross: That was almost poetic.

Looking Ahead

Jonathan Coachman is backstage with Christian.

Jonathan Coachman: Christian, as you know, you’ll take on Shawn Michaels in tonight’s main event. Do you have any regrets regarding agreeing to the match?

Christian: Regrets? No wonder everybody hates you, Coach. My only regret is that I waited so long to shut that over the hill prima donna up. This isn’t 1993 anymore, and the Heartbreak Kid isn’t the hot new flavor on the block. It’s time for him to get put out to pasture, and Captain Charisma is just the future legend to do it. My Peeps know it, I know it, and deep down inside, Shawn Michaels knows it.

Overall: 44.6%

Jim Ross: Some confidence from Christian!

Al Snow: Well, why not? He’s one of the most decorated champions in WWE history.

Ric Flair versus Rhyno

Despite their actual alignments, it became very clear that the Fort Lauderdale crowd was hoping for a Flair victory. Nevertheless, Rhyno took the upper hand in the beginning, whipping Flair to the corner and ripping into him with Vader-like fists. Flair countered with a poke to the eye, but Rhyno soon bealed him out of the corner into the center of the ring. Rhyno kept up the power-based offense until Flair managed to nail him with a chop block. From that point on, Flair put everything he could into destroying the leg of the man-beast. Before long, Flair’s kicks, kneebreakers, and elbow drops left Rhyno unable to stand properly. Unable to go for the Gore, he attempted a Piledriver, but Flair reversed with a backdrop. When Rhyno got to his feet, Flair took him down with another chop block, then wrapped on the Figure Four Leglock. In a state of unbearable pain, Rhyno tapped out, ending the match at 10:21.

Crowd: 80.2%

Match: 61.2%

Overall: 77.5%

Jim Ross: Rhyno fought, but the sixteen time World Champion was just too much for him.

Al Snow: He’s keeping Evolution’s seat hot until Batista and Triple H get back, J.R. I know they’ll be here next week. Can you imagine what that’ll be like?

Jim Ross: I’m afraid I can.

Snitsky’s Fault

Shelton Benjamin’s music hits the loudspeaker. The fans go nuts as the WWE Intercontinental Champion makes his way onto the stage.

Jim Ross: What a victory last night by the Intercontinental Champion! Shelton Benjamin is set to- what the hell?

As Benjamin walks to the ring, Gene Snitsky runs out of the entranceway, his forehead heavily bandaged. He catches Benjamin halfway down the ramp with a clothesline, sending the champion to the floor.

Jim Ross: What is this? What the hell is going on?

Al Snow: Snitsky’s on the warpath, J.R.!

Snitsky grabs Benjamin by the arm, lifts him up, and tosses him into the ring. As the Intercontinental Champion gets to his feet, Gene Snitsky nails him with a charging kick to the head.

Al Snow: Good grief, what a kick!

Jim Ross: Can we get some damn help out here, for crying out loud? The Intercontinental Champion is being assaulted!

Snitsky lifts Benjamin up again, grabs him by the throat, and delivers a vicious Chokeslam. A host of referees and road agents run down to ringside, but merely looking at them is all Snitsky needs to do to keep them at bay. He lifts Benjamin up again, whips him to the ropes, and catches him with another Chokeslam as he comes back.

Jim Ross: This is unreal! What did Benjamin even do to Snitsky? How could he deserve this?

Al Snow: Snitsky’s a madman, J.R.! That should answer all your questions!

Jim Ross: This isn’t right!

Al Snow: Then by all means, do something about it!

Snitsky rolls Shelton Benjamin out of the ring, then heads out after him. Snitsky grabs a chair, then blasts Benjamin with it when he finally gets to his feet. With a look of pure madness on his eyes, Snitsky pulls the monitors out of the Spanish announcers’ table.

Jim Ross: Oh, no, I don’t like where this is going!

Gene Snitsky pulls Benjamin up, grabs him from behind, and lifts him for a back suplex. Still holding Benjamin, he climbs onto the apron. From there, he takes a running start and hurls Benjamin with all his might, sending the Intercontinental Champion crashing through the table.

Jim Ross: GOOD GOD! WHAT THE HELL KIND OF ANIMAL IS SNITSKY? IS SHELTON BENJAMIN EVEN BREATHING?!?

Al Snow: This… I’ve… wow…

Snitsky stands over the Shelton Benjamin and the wrecked table, his eyes wide with anger, as the EMTs head out to the ringside area.

Overall: 78.0%

Jim Ross: Have you ever seen anything remotely like what Gene Snitsky just did to Shelton Benjamin?

Al Snow: Not once in twenty-plus, years, J.R. But on the plus side, odds are that Shelton Benjamin just made the opening video package for Raw!

Jim Ross: I’m gonna be sick.

Steven Richards versus Sylvan Grenier

When Raw returned following a commercial break, the situation at ringside had been cleaned up, and Steven Richards and Sylvan Grenier were both in the ring. They started things off with a lockup, then went to basic wrestling, where Richards took the early advantage. Grenier tried to regroup, slid out of the ring, and conferred with his partner, Robert Conway, but much to the delight of the crowd, Richards slid out and slammed both of their heads together. Back in the ring, Richards kept the offense up, showing the same fire he did in his match against Viscera the previous night. Grenier’s best was ducked and dodged, and before long, Richards connected with the Steviekick. He made the cover and scored the pinfall at 4:53.

Crowd: 66.0%

Match: 63.1%

Overall: 68.0%

Jim Ross: An impressive victory by Steven Richards, beating a former World Tag Team Champion, but after that heinous beatdown by Snitsky, my mind is elsewhere. I’m sorry.

Al Snow: Maybe we’ll get some light shed on the situation, J.R., as I’m being told that Coach has caught up to Snitsky backstage. That’s a shame, I kinda liked Coach. Ah well.

The Motive

Gene Snitsky is walking down one of the backstage corridors. Jonathan Coachman is approaching him from behind, trotting briskly.

Jonathan Coachman: Gene! Gene Snitsky! Why did you-

Snitsky turns around and emits an inhuman bellow. The Coach turns around immediately and runs as fast as his legs will carry him.

Gene Snitsky: Why did I do it? I did it because if I’m gonna get blamed for things around here, they might as well be my fault! It’s my fault that Shelton Benjamin’s gonna be in the hospital tonight! It’s my fault that his bones are broken! And it’s my fault that when he gets back, I’m gonna destroy him and take the Intercontinental Title!

Overall: 27.4%

Jim Ross: Sick… just sick.

Al Snow: The more you know, J.R.

The Time Approaches…

The camera cuts to a locker room backstage, where Shawn Michaels is lacing up his boots. A knock sounds at the door.

Shawn Michaels: Come in.

A stagehand enters.

Stagehand: Three minutes, Shawn.

Shawn Michaels: Thanks, chief.

Michaels finishes lacing his boots as the camera cuts away.

Overall: 80.8

Jim Ross: Shawn Michaels is ready, Christian says he’s ready, it’s time for our main event, right after this commercial break!

Shawn Michaels versus Christian

Things were even between Michaels and Christian in the early goings, with each man visibly surprised at the skill of the other. Soon, though, Michaels’s experience won out, and he took control after a few mistakes by Christian. Michaels hit a flying forearm, and scored a two count after taking his old Side Suplex finisher out of mothballs. Christian still kept his head in the match, getting near falls off of a backbreaker and a superkick of his own. He went for a second superkick, slapping his leg and shouting out “Peep Chin Music!” beforehand, but Michaels ducked, pulled Christian’s other leg, and catapulted him into the corner as Tyson Tomko watched on. Michaels backdropped Christian as he staggered out of the corner, then climbed to the top turnbuckle and hit the elbow drop. As the fans went crazy, Michaels started tuning up the band. However, Edge came out of the crowd wearing street clothes and a neck brace, and grabbed HBK’s leg. Christian got to his feet and attacked Michaels, at which point Edge entered the ring and opened up with punches and kicks on Shawn Michaels. The referee called for a disqualification, ending the match at 14:16, but Edge and Christian continued to beat Michaels down.

Crowd: 81.6%

Match: 64.6%

Overall: 88.1%

Al Snow: I thought you said Edge wasn’t here, J.R.!

Jim Ross: I heard he wasn’t! Edge fooled us all, and Shawn Michaels is the one who’s suffering for it!

Show Rating: 60.3%

Not a bad show, I thought as it ended. Especially considering the guys who weren’t on tonight.

I sat back in my chair, but immediately got up, remembering about the piece of paper hanging from the door of my office. I turned the knob, opened it, stuck my arm out, grabbed the sheet, and pulled it back in. I looked at the paper and saw three capital letters splayed across the top:

HHH

Edited February 10, 2005 by Scott Boulder Fried

[therockbox]

Somebody's in trouble

Seriously, good show. Especially considering who wasn't there, like you said.

The Awakening vignettes are interesting and well written.

Yeah, good show. Looking forward to SD!.

[KJE]

I read the show last night and am skimming through again right now. Very good, and interesting ending. I'll have to agree and disagree with what was just said, the Awakening vignettes are cool... but 0%? Unless you missed a number or something, YIKES.

[Boulder]

Thanks for the feedback, I'm glad you guys are digging the Awakening segments. Unfortunately, the "0.0%" is no mistake, so I may have to cut them short and debut her sooner than later. Ah well, c'est la vie.

[Boulder]

“In some ways, you guys are in a better position than the guys on Raw. Sure, until now, the writing team has been giving them the focus. Plus, I know there’s a lot that you guys aren’t happy about. But one thing I will say is that you guys are all on the same page. You’re a team- you succeed together, you fail together.” I was addressing all of the Smackdown wrestlers, and a good portion of them seemed to be into what I was trying to tell them. I meant what I said, too- I’d been having some attitude problems on Raw that were a bit more difficult to deal with than the troubles with the Smackdown locker room.

“You guys are top athletes, great wrestlers, but things haven’t been panning out. You know what? It’s not your fault. All I ask is that you guys work your hardest out in the ring, and by and large, that’s what I see. The problems are creative ones, and that’s my department.

“If any of you has a problem, please contact me. Don’t hesitate. I’ll make my home phone number available- my cell phone, too. Do not hesitate to voice a concern.”

Almost all of the boys seemed satisfied- except for The Undertaker, whose gruff expression never wavered.

WWE Smackdown!

January 13, 2005

Michael Cole: Welcome to Smackdown, everybody! I’m Michael Cole, this is Tazz, and tonight, the tournament for the number 30 spot in the Royal Rumble continues with Heidenreich versus Hardcore Holly and Rob Van Dam versus Luther Reigns!

Tazz: Those oughta be some big time matchups, Cole! I am psyched for tonight!

Michael Cole: I’ve also been told that The Big Show is here, and after last week’s swerve involving JBL and Kurt Angle, he’s not happy!

Tazz: He may be unhappy, Cole, but he’s also outnumbered! There’s not a superstar in the world who could get it done against JBL and Angle, if they’re on the same page!

Michael Cole: You may be right about that, Tazz. Now, let’s go to the ring for our opening match!

WWE United States Championship Match: John Cena © versus D-Von Dudley

The crowd was completely behind Cena, but rather than frustrate D-Von Dudley, that just made him angrier and less forgiving in his attack. He opened the match by clobbering Cena in the gut, then lifted him up by the hair and caught him in the jaw with a forearm. John Cena soon turned the tide, however, catching the challenger with a backdrop, a clothesline, and then a hiptoss. Cena retained control, scoring several power moves before hitting the Five-Knuckle Shuffle fist drop. He pumped up his sneakers and went for an F-U, but D-Von slid off of his shoulders and took him down with a chop block. The advantage bounced back and forth after that point, with D-Von almost snatching the win and the title after the Saving Grace neckbreaker. However, Cena finally staggered him with a running elbow, then hit the F-U, getting the pin at 9:23. Afterwards, Bubba Ray Dudley ran out of the back into the ring, and he and D-Von managed to double team Cena. For the second week in a row, the U.S. Champion was left on his back courtesy of the Dudley Death Drop.

Crowd: 77.4%

Match: 70.5%

Overall: 79.0%

Michael Cole: John Cena can’t win, Tazz! He beats D-Von, Bubba Ray attacks! The Dudley Boyz have their eyes on him, and he can’t handle them both!

Tazz: Hey, if that’s the way The Dudleyz want it, Cole, who’s gonna stop ‘em? You?

Laying Down the Law

WWE Champion John Bradshaw Layfield’s music hits the loudspeaker, and he makes his way out to the ring. However, he is not alone- Kurt Angle, one of his opponents at the Royal Rumble, is right beside him.

John Bradshaw Layfield: Thank you, thank you. But if I’m really giving out thanks, I gotta say, Kurt, thank you most of all. Not only were you the greatest General Manager in Smackdown history, but you- you are one heck of a partner!

Kurt Angle: Thank you, John! Coming from a great champion, that’s a great compliment!

Michael Cole: This is ridiculous! I’m gonna be sick!

Kurt Angle: I only wish that at the Royal Rumble, we could see two great Americans go at it one on one, in a battle of honor and sportsmanship.

John Bradshaw Layfield: If only!

Kurt Angle: But we can’t! We can’t because of two men… Teddy Long and The Big Show! Two men who, for their own selfish reasons, don’t want to see a great American bash… no pun intended, heh heh.

John Bradshaw Layfield: You are so right, Kurt, but please, take solace, take comfort in the fact that with our alliance, we’ll at least see a real American hero walk out of the Royal Rumble with the title.

General Manager Teddy Long’s music hits, and he makes his way onto the stage with a microphone in hand.

Teddy Long: Whoa, whoa, now hold on just a minute, playas. First of all, I can’t see what’s so American about two cowards who’d be afraid of their own shadows without their goon squads! Now ya better belee dat!

John Bradshaw Layfield: Hold on just a second! Now you better-

Teddy Long: Sorry, champ, but the boss is still talking! Now you guys don’t wanna have to wrestle The Big Show? Tough. In fact, I got more bad news for you. Tonight, in the main event, you two’ll be wrestling The Big Show and any partner he chooses!

John Bradshaw Layfield: No!

Kurt Angle: You can’t!

Teddy Long: That’s where you’re wrong, playa! I can make the match, I can make you wrestle in a chicken suit if I see it fit. So you might wanna bite your tongues before I get any more ideas!

Teddy Long heads to the back, leaving Kurt Angle and JBL staring at each other in disbelief.

Overall: 67.0%

Tazz: GM Teddy Long layin’ down the law, making a big, big match for tonight!

Michael Cole: But who will The Big Show pick?

Tazz: There’s a lotta guys who’d love to get their hands on Angle and the WWE Champ, Cole!

Heidenreich versus Hardcore Holly

With Paul Heyman in tow, an angry Heidenreich met Hardcore Holly halfway down the ramp and unleashed a wave of power and fury on him. Holly tried to fight back, but Heidenreich shrugged off his offense and whipped him into the steel steps on the side of the ring. Heidenreich then picked him up and launched him from the floor to the inside of the ring with a Gorilla Press Slam. As Heidenreich got in, referee Brian Hebner called for the bell to start the match. Heidenreich toyed with Holly for a brief time, then nailed him with a big boot. He then lifted Holly for a powerbomb, and brutally delivered the move against the turnbuckle. Heidenreich then tossed Holly over the top rope, allowing himself to win the match by countout at 1:57.

Crowd: 62.8%

Match: 53.5%

Overall: 56.2

Michael Cole: What a massacre! Heidenreich just destroyed one of the toughest men on either WWE roster!

Tazz: Holly is bad to the bone, and Heidenreich made him a chew toy! The Undertaker saw that, you better believe!

A Confident Champion

Josh Mathews is standing backstage with John Bradshaw Layfield.

Josh Mathews: JBL, Theodore Long has ordered that tonight, you and Kurt-

John Bradshaw Layfield: Now hold on just a second, sparky. I am the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion. I do not follow orders, I give them. Kurt Angle and I will be wrestling The Big Show and his partner, but only because we’re willing to do so. And to answer your next question, I do not give a damn who The Big Show picks as his partner. Undertaker, Eddie Guerrero, Booker T… all men who I’ve beaten before and can beat again! Let Big Show bring a whole damn army, I don’t care! We are two American heroes, and we can’t be stopped!

Overall: 49.9

Michael Cole: JBL is a little too confident, if you ask me. He could be overlooking a big match tonight!

Tazz: Big match? Sure. Too confident? No way. He’s beaten everyone, remember?

Michael Cole: I’m just saying, Tazz, that could come back to bite him.

Backstage Assault

Rob Van Dam is walking through a corridor backstage. A stagehand runs up behinds him and taps him on the shoulder. RVD spins around with his hands up, as alert as ever. The stagehand recoils.

Rob Van Dam: Whoa, sorry, man! Didn’t mean to scare you there.

Stagehand: That’s… that’s alright. Just wanted to tell you that you’re on right before the main event tonight.

Rob Van Dam: Story of my life, man. Thanks for the heads up.

The stagehand leaves, and RVD continues heading down the hall. Luther Reigns runs up behind him this time and taps him on the shoulder. RVD casually turns around.

Rob Van Dam: Something up, ma-

Rob Van Dam is cut off as Reigns catches him in the jaw with a right hand. Van Dam staggers back, and Reigns flattens him with a running knee. When RVD hits the floor, Reigns grabs him by the hair, pulls him up, and drags him to a locker room door. With RVD still dazed, Reigns opens the door, sticks his head it, and slams it shut. He repeats the action, then drops an unconscious Van Dam on the floor. Laughing, Reigns walks off.

Overall: 79.1%

Michael Cole: I don’t believe it! How is RVD suppose to be at 100% for his match against Reigns tonight?

Tazz: That’s the point, ya knucklehead!

Orlando Jordan versus Chavo Guerrero, Jr.

Chavo took the early advantage, knocking Jordan out of the ring after a backdrop and a dropkick. With the crowd surprisingly rapt by his actions, Guerrero launched himself over the ropes and took out Jordan with a plancha. Back in the ring, Jordan turned things in his favor with an eye poke, then slowed down the pace of the match. Nevertheless, the fans stayed heavily behind Chavo. Soon afterwards, Jordan broke a Tornado DDT attempt and powerslammed Chavo, but only got two. Chavo dodged a clothesline and caught Jordan with a Reverse DDT, but just then, Billy Kidman broke out through the crowd. As Chavo hooked Jordan up for a Gory Bomb, Kidman climbed onto the apron. From his vantage point, referee Charles Robinson could not see Kidman, and so when Kidman grabbed Chavo by the head and guillotined him across the rope, there was no action taken. Jordan capitalized on the interference, lifting Chavo onto his shoulders and nailing him with the Running Powerslam for the win at 7:07.

Crowd: 69.0%

Match: 70.6%

Overall: 68.1%

Michael Cole: Why the hell is Billy Kidman doing these things, Tazz? He’s getting Chavo and Paul London mad at him all over again!

Tazz: Don’t ask me, Cole! He’s makin’ a big mistake!

The Partner Picked, the Goal Clear

Josh Mathews is standing in the backstage interview area with The Big Show.

Josh Mathews: Big Show, tonight you and a mystery partner are going to be taking on Kurt Angle and JBL. What are your thoughts about getting your hands on the two men who set you up last week?

The Big Show: Not my thoughts, Josh- our thoughts. I’ve already picked my partner, and he is as psyched as I am for this match. He can’t wait to get his hands on JBL. As for me, I’ve been counting down the days until the Royal Rumble- when I finally get to get my hands around JBL and Angle’s throats. But tonight is like Christmas all over again, Josh. I get to Chokeslam those two goons to hell a full seventeen days ahead of schedule! You’ll see me and my partner out there in the ring later tonight!

Overall: 66.0%

Michael Cole: The Big Show’s already got his partner, and he wants to get his hands on JBL?

Tazz: Like I said, Cole, that could be anyone!

Michael Cole: Well, we’ll find- wait, I’m getting a message from the back… Marc Loyd has caught up to Billy Kidman backstage!

On the Run

Billy Kidman is running through the parking garage, his bag slung over his shoulder. Marc Loyd is behind him, struggling to keep up.

Marc Loyd: Kidman! Kidman!

Kidman stops and spins around, a big smile on his face.

Marc Loyd Kidman, why-

Billy Kidman: Sorry, Marc, no time to talk! Everybody wants a piece of Billy Kidman!

Kidman opens up the door of a nearby sports car, gets in, and speeds away.

Overall: 72.5%

Michael Cole: Do you believe Kidman? Is he for real?

Tazz: He ain’t right, Cole, I’ll give ya that!

Booker T and Eddie Guerrero versus The Basham Brothers

Eddie Guerrero and Doug Basham started the match off, going hold for hold on the canvas until Eddie popped up and hit a dropkick. Doug tagged Danny, who rushed in with a clothesline. However, Eddie took him down with a drop toe hold. With frequent tags, Eddie and Booker managed to wear The Basham Brothers down. This continued until Doug hit Booker with a leg lariat, forcing the five time WCW Champion to get his foot under the bottom rope to avoid being pinned. Doug then brought Booker over to the heel corner, allowing the Bashams to double team him. Booker managed to fight his way out and tagged Eddie, who took out both Bashams with an armdrag/headscissor combination. For several minutes, Eddie kept control, until Danny Basham nailed him with a low blow behind Brian Hebner’s back. Eddie was forced to tag out, but Booker quickly took the advantage, hit a sidekick, and nailed the Scissor Kick, pinning Danny Basham at 12:32.

Crowd: 75.2%

Match: 71.0%

Overall: 73.4%

Michael Cole: A big win by Booker and Eddie! We could see these guys challenging for the WWE Tag Team Titles before long!

Different Pages

Booker T and Eddie Guerrero are backstage together, each drinking from a water bottle after their grueling win.

Booker T: Man, you believe that? You and me in a match together, we can’t lose!

Eddie Guerrero: I wouldn’t be so sure, ese.

Booker T: What do you mean?

Eddie Guerrero: Well, we’re both in the Royal Rumble, holmes. We can’t both win that.

Booker T: Why you tryin’ to spoil the moment, huh? You got some problem?

Eddie Guerrero: No, no. Just keeping you on your toes.

Booker’s facial expression changes from one of anger to one of exasperation.

Booker T: Fine, man.

Eddie Guerrero: Good. And good luck against Heidenreich next week. You’ll need it!

Booker’s eyes open wide as Eddie leaves the room.

Overall: 83.2%

Michael Cole: Eddie’s even trying to psych out his own partner, Tazz!

Tazz: The Royal Rumble’s right around the corner, Cole- there are no partners!

Luther Reigns versus Rob Van Dam

Rob Van Dam came to the ring still in visible pain, and as such, he never fully hit his stride in the match. Reigns immediately leveled him with a pair of clotheslines, then wore him down with a headlock. Van Dam eventually managed to get out and hit a spin kick, but when Reigns scored a powerslam, RVD was in trouble yet again. Reigns lifted him up and set him on the top rope in a sitting position, then caught RVD with a kick to the chest, knocking him straight to the arena floor. Following that brutal display, the match was more or less over. Still, Reigns continued to play with Van Dam, whipping him into the steel ring steps before tossing him back in the ring. Finally, his taste for pain having been satisfied, Reigns nailed RVD with the Spinning Reverse Neckbreaker and scored the win at 6:56.

Crowd: 77.5%

Match: 70.0%

Overall: 83.6%

Michael Cole: What brutality, what evil shown by Luther Reigns!

Tazz: Don’t argue with success, Cole! He’s one step closer to the final spot in the Rumble!

American Heroes?

Josh Mathews is backstage with Kurt Angle.

Josh Mathews: Kurt, you-

Kurt Angle: Save it, pipsqueak! If I wanted to hear you yap on and on, I’d watch American Idol! Yes, JBL and I have a tag match coming up next, and yes, The Big Show’s partner is a mystery. But who the heck cares? We’re talking Olympic Gold Medalist Kurt Angle! We’re talking WWE Champion and “Great American Award” winner John Bradshaw Layfield! Remember that award, Josh? I gave it to him- me- because he deserved it! Tonight, when the American Heroes get through with Show and his partner, they’ll be begging to head to a different country… or Raw, same difference, really!

Overall: 81.1%

Michael Cole: Who’s Big Show’ partner, Tazz? I’m dying to find out!

Tazz: Be cool, Cole! After this break, we’ll find out!

The Big Show and Shannon Moore versus John Bradshaw Layfield and Kurt Angle

Kurt Angle and John Bradshaw Layfield had trouble containing their laughter as The Big Show brought Shannon Moore to the ring. However, their smiles faded when Show charged the ring, caught Angle with a kick, and headbutted the WWE Champion. With Moore on the apron, The Big Show pulverized both opponents, sending a perfectly clear message regarding their Royal Rumble match. Angle managed to catch Show with a chop block, allowing both heels to set him up for a suplex. However, before they could lift Show, Shannon Moore came off the top rope with the Mooregasm, flattening the champion! Show kept in control of the situation as a disoriented JBL rolled out of the ring. When Angle slipped out of a gutbuster and went for the Angle Slam, Show shook him off, grabbed him by the throat, and Chokeslammed him. Legal man JBL charged back into the ring, only to meet the same fate. Show pinned him at 12:03, giving him and Moore the win.

Crowd: 59.9%

Match: 68.6%

Overall: 69.2%

Tazz: I don’t believe it, Cole! Shannon Moore!

Michael Cole: Big Show sure as hell showed those so-called “American Heroes!” He and Shannon Moore took care of business here tonight!

Show Rating: 71.4%

[britneyspearsisgod]

Scotty my man, you're doing good again. As it is, I think you are doing a good job of laying down the ground work for the future of your WWE. I'm impressed with the Royal Rumble set-up, as I have a sneaky suspiscion Chris Jericho is going to take the power back

As for anything else? Well, despite bringing in new workers who are good at wrestling (and less shitsters like Heidenreich, etc.), I can't say you aren't moving along nicely. Keep it up, and I'll make sure I always drop in to read this

[Boulder]

WWE Velocity

January 15, 2005

Josh Mathews: It’s Saturday night, and that means we’ve got an hour of hot, hot action for ya! I’m Josh Mathews and this is Steve Romero, and we’re kickin’ things off, big time! We’ve got a Cruiserweight Championship match tonight- Funaki versus Nunzio! Talk about a main event!

Steve Romero: Right you are, Josh, that should be great! And speaking of great, what better way to start things off than with a Grade-A athlete like Charlie Haas?

Charlie Haas versus Mark Jindrak

Jindrak took an early advantage with a clothesline and an overpowering dropkick. However, when he went for a charging elbow, Haas dodged, took him down, and worked him on the mat. Haas immediately went to work on Jindrak’s leg, wrenching it and slamming it against the canvas. For several minutes, Haas kept the offensive, excluding a brief Jindrak flurry here and there. Finally, enough damage done, Haas locked in the Haas of Pain, drawing a submission at 5:12.

Crowd: 67.6%

Match: 70.2%

Overall: 63.5%

Josh Mathews: Big win by the Seton Hall standout, making the big man tap!

Steve Romero: Charlie Haas took out a key member of his former mentor’s team; he’ll go far in this business, you can bet on that!

Josh Mathews: Speaking of Angle’s team, Jindrak’s regular partner, Luther Reigns, showed no mercy when dealing with Rob Van Dam on Smackdown. He’s a scary guy who has no respect for the rules!

Rob Van Dam is walking through a corridor backstage.  A stagehand runs up behinds him and taps him on the shoulder.  RVD spins around with his hands up, as alert as ever.  The stagehand recoils.

Rob Van Dam: Whoa, sorry, man!  Didn’t mean to scare you there.

Stagehand: That’s… that’s alright.  Just wanted to tell you that you’re on right before the main event tonight.

Rob Van Dam: Story of my life, man.  Thanks for the heads up.

The stagehand leaves, and RVD continues heading down the hall.  Luther Reigns runs up behind him this time and taps him on the shoulder.  RVD casually turns around.

Rob Van Dam: Something up, ma-

Rob Van Dam is cut off as Reigns catches him in the jaw with a right hand.  Van Dam staggers back, and Reigns flattens him with a running knee.  When RVD hits the floor, Reigns grabs him by the hair, pulls him up, and drags him to a locker room door.  With RVD still dazed, Reigns opens the door, sticks his head it, and slams it shut.  He repeats the action, then drops an unconscious Van Dam on the floor.  Laughing, Reigns walks off.

Josh Mathews: After that assault, Luther Reigns had no problem defeating RVD and advancing in the Royal Rumble tournament.

Steve Romero: And with a vicious mean streak like that, he could go all the way!

Rey Mysterio versus Xavier

Though independent standout Xavier was no more successful in this match than he was in his previous Velocity appearances, he put on an impressive performance. He was able to match Rey move for move, at one point nearly pinning him after a standing quebrada. For his part, Rey got near falls off of a second rope bulldog and a victory roll. The finish came when Xavier missed a crossbody and hung himself up on the second rope. Rey then hit the 619 and the West Coast Pop, getting the pin at 6:18.

Crowd: 63.4%

Match: 77.6%

Overall: 73.5%

Steve Romero: Great match, huh? Xavier came so close to pulling off an upset!

Josh Mathews: An upset like we saw on Smackdown, Steve! The Big Show beat the WWE Champion JBL and Kurt Angle… along with his partner, Shannon Moore!

Kurt Angle and John Bradshaw Layfield had trouble containing their laughter as The Big Show brought Shannon Moore to the ring.  However, their smiles faded when Show charged the ring, caught Angle with a kick, and headbutted the WWE Champion.  With Moore on the apron, The Big Show pulverized both opponents, sending a perfectly clear message regarding their Royal Rumble match.  Angle managed to catch Show with a chop block, allowing both heels to set him up for a suplex.  However, before they could lift Show, Shannon Moore came off the top rope with the Mooregasm, flattening the champion!  Show kept in control of the situation as a disoriented JBL rolled out of the ring.  When Angle slipped out of a gutbuster and went for the Angle Slam, Show shook him off, grabbed him by the throat, and Chokeslammed him.  Legal man JBL charged back into the ring, only to meet the same fate.  Show pinned him at 12:03, giving him and Moore the win.

Josh Mathews: I still can’t believe it, Steve! Show has so much momentum going into the Rumble!

Steve Romero: Even together, JBL and Angle can’t stop him!

WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match: Funaki © versus Nunzio

After a handshake to start things off, both men opened up their respective offenses. Nunzio managed to subdue Funaki on the mat, but the Cruiserweight Champion took control with a crossbody, a dropkick, and a flying forearm. Nunzio was able to regain control, nearly scoring the win after a dropkick from the second turnbuckle. However, after escaping an Arrivederci attempt, Funaki was able to hit a bulldog. After that, he had little trouble setting Nunzio up for the Rising Sun and delivering the move. He covered Nunzio and scored the pin at 6:47.

Crowd: 63.2%

Match: 73.4%

Overall: 71.7%

Steve Romero: What an exciting match! Funaki retains the Cruiserweight Title!

Josh Mathews: He retains it in style, Steve! For Steve Romero, I’m Josh Mathews… goodnight!

Show Rating: 54.2%

[Boulder]

WWE Sunday Night Heat

January 16, 2005

Todd Grisham: Welcome to Sunday Night Heat, fans! I’m Todd Grisham, and… and this is my new co-host, Jonathan Coachman.

Jonathan Coachman: Why so glum, Todd? I’m better looking than Ivory, I’m more fun to be around, and hey, who knows, maybe some of my skill with the ladies’ll rub off on you!

Todd Grisham: Thanks, Coach. Maybe you’ll be a better broadcaster for it.

Jonathan Coachman: Whoa, easy, fella!

Tajiri versus Al Snow

Raw color commentator Al Snow decided to step back in the ring, though afterwards he may have found himself regretting the decision. He overpowered and outbrawled Tajiri in the early goings, but the former Cruiserweight Champion soon took control after a hook kick. Tajiri continued to wear Snow down, scrapping away with punches and kicks and then hitting the handspring elbow. With Snow dazed, Tajiri caught him in the knee with a low dropkick, then nailed him in the head with the Buzzsaw Kick. The pinfall followed at 4:18.

Crowd: 69.0%

Match: 79.8%

Rating: 75.3%

Todd Grisham: Looks like your old running buddy ends up looking at the lights, Coach!

Jonathan Coachman: Don’t worry about Al Snow, Todd. He and I are the ones allowed on Raw!

Todd Grisham: Well, speaking of Raw, we saw an unbelievable assault perpetrated by Gene Snitsky on Shelton Benjamin. Let’s take a look at that.

Shelton Benjamin’s music hits the loudspeaker.  The fans go nuts as the WWE Intercontinental Champion makes his way onto the stage.

Jim Ross: What a victory last night by the Intercontinental Champion!  Shelton Benjamin is set to- what the hell?

As Benjamin walks to the ring, Gene Snitsky runs out of the entranceway, his forehead heavily bandaged.  He catches Benjamin halfway down the ramp with a clothesline, sending the champion to the floor.

Jim Ross: What is this?  What the hell is going on?

Al Snow: Snitsky’s on the warpath, J.R.!

Snitsky grabs Benjamin by the arm, lifts him up, and tosses him into the ring.  As the Intercontinental Champion gets to his feet, Gene Snitsky nails him with a charging kick to the head.

Al Snow: Good grief, what a kick!

Jim Ross: Can we get some damn help out here, for crying out loud?  The Intercontinental Champion is being assaulted!

Snitsky lifts Benjamin up again, grabs him by the throat, and delivers a vicious Chokeslam.  A host of referees and road agents run down to ringside, but merely looking at them is all Snitsky needs to do to keep them at bay.  He lifts Benjamin up again, whips him to the ropes, and catches him with another Chokeslam as he comes back.

Jim Ross: This is unreal!  What did Benjamin even do to Snitsky?  How could he deserve this?

Al Snow: Snitsky’s a madman, J.R.!  That should answer all your questions!

Jim Ross: This isn’t right!

Al Snow: Then by all means, do something about it!

Snitsky rolls Shelton Benjamin out of the ring, then heads out after him.  Snitsky grabs a chair, then blasts Benjamin with it when he finally gets to his feet.  With a look of pure madness on his eyes, Snitsky pulls the monitors out of the Spanish announcers’ table.

Jim Ross: Oh, no, I don’t like where this is going!

Gene Snitsky pulls Benjamin up, grabs him from behind, and lifts him for a back suplex.  Still holding Benjamin, he climbs onto the apron.  From there, he takes a running start and hurls Benjamin with all his might, sending the Intercontinental Champion crashing through the table.

Jim Ross: GOOD GOD!  WHAT THE HELL KIND OF ANIMAL IS SNITSKY?  IS SHELTON BENJAMIN EVEN BREATHING?!?

Al Snow: This… I’ve… wow…

Snitsky stands over the Shelton Benjamin and the wrecked table, his eyes wide with anger, as the EMTs head out to the ringside area.

Jonathan Coachman: The Coach doesn’t get shocked easily, but that was shocking!

Todd Grisham: Undoubtedly. Shelton spent the night at the hospital on Monday, and though he’s been released, he is in no condition to show up at Raw tomorrow.

La Resistance versus Devon Storm and Dick Togo

The odd couple of Togo and Storm had a tall task ahead of them- facing the former World Tag Team Champions, La Resistance. Unsurprisingly, Grenier and Conway stayed dominant throughout the course of the match, making more frequent tags and showing better cohesion. For their part, Storm and Togo almost scored the win after a slingshot legdrop/senton bomb combination onto Grenier, but he managed to get his foot onto the rope. Shortly thereafter, La Resistance managed to hit Devon Storm with the Au Revoir, leading to the pinfall at 6:12.

Crowd: 59.7%

Match: 63.8%

Overall: 63.0%

Todd Grisham: A nice showing by two familiar faces, but La Resistance picks up the victory.

Jonathan Coachman: I’m intrigued, Todd; Togo and Storm seem like an odd couple, but they’ve got a lot in common- they’re both rough, tough, and willing to get as dirty as possible to get the job done!

Todd Grisham: Not a bad point, Coach. These guys are both hardcore!

Jonathan Coachman: Cute, Todd.

Things were even between Michaels and Christian in the early goings, with each man visibly surprised at the skill of the other.  Soon, though, Michaels’s experience won out, and he took control after a few mistakes by Christian.  Michaels hit a flying forearm, and scored a two count after taking his old Side Suplex finisher out of mothballs.  Christian still kept his head in the match, getting near falls off of a backbreaker and a superkick of his own.  He went for a second superkick, slapping his leg and shouting out “Peep Chin Music!” beforehand, but Michaels ducked, pulled Christian’s other leg, and catapulted him into the corner as Tyson Tomko watched on.  Michaels backdropped Christian as he staggered out of the corner, then climbed to the top turnbuckle and hit the elbow drop.  As the fans went crazy, Michaels started tuning up the band.  However, Edge came out of the crowd wearing street clothes and a neck brace, and grabbed HBK’s leg.  Christian got to his feet and attacked Michaels, at which point Edge entered the ring and opened up with punches and kicks on Shawn Michaels.  The referee called for a disqualification, ending the match at 14:16, but Edge and Christian continued to beat Michaels down.

Todd Grisham: Edge and Christian on the same side of an attack! Could we be witnessing the rebirth of an alliance?

Jonathan Coachman: I hope so, Todd! The definitive tag team of the 21st century, back together again… it warms my heart!

Simon Dean versus Rosey

Rosey rushed Simon Dean from the opening bell, his anger fueling his aggression but ultimately, stifling his focus. When referee Jack Doan was distracted, Dean hit a low blow, then followed up with a DDT. Dean kept in control, slipping out of a bodyslam attempt and hitting Rosey between the shoulderblades with a dropkick. He followed up with a springboard splash, surprising the crowd, but only scoring two. With Rosey reeling, Dean hit the Carb Cutter and scored the three at 9:49. He continued to batter Rosey with kneedrops and stomps until The Hurricane charged the ring and chased him out.

Crowd: 67.6%

Match: 60.4%

Overall: 70.2%

Jonathan Coachman: A victory for the good-looking people of the world, Todd! Don’t let it sting too much!

Todd Grisham: Well, one thing’s for sure… this isn’t over between the Superheroes and Simon Dean. See you tomorrow night on Raw, folks!

Show Rating: 65.7%

[TGC]

Closed and moved to Archives.