NHL 2010/2011

[TGWL]

I like the speed Toronto has. I also like how they ran into a brick fucking wall and still found a way to score 4 goals.

[Clawson]

Ugh. Being a Leafs fan this year would be a lot more fun if most other Leafs fans weren't like Clawson. And Don Taylor is awesome, and makes me miss early 00's NHL games with Jim Hughson. It is the same guy right?

Yeah, because all Leaf fans should stand around and take constant jokes about planing parades and having a shitty last year like retards. Especially from teams from the other conference, during a game that doesn't involve us.

It's beyond annoying hearing shit from people all the time about the Leafs. We made the playoffs since 2004 nor have we won the Cup since 1967. Thanks for pointing out something we're well aware of. At least we've won a Cup.

Plus this 4-0-0 start is a nice surprise and no Leaf fan expects us to go 82-0-0 or even compete for the Cup. We're still in a battle to get into the playoffs so excuse us if we get excited if our team is making it easier to do so with a hot streak out the gate.

Edited October 17, 2010 by Clawson

[Pizza]

Nothing wrong with being excited, I'm excited, not just because of the record but because just watching the games, they haven't played this well since the lockout. I just hate the persecution complex Torontonians have, it was a light hearted joke, with no malicious intent.

[Clawson]

Sure it would be easy to take....if he wasn't the millionth person who thought he was being original and witty. Remember there is a reason why Spike TV had Canuck fans as the 5th worst fans in the entire sports world.

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

Canucks fans aren't even the fifth-worst in hockey.

[Pizza]

But MPH, Spike TV said it, it must be true!

Seriously the guy is a sportscaster, I'm sure he made his fair share of Todd Bertuzzi jokes, he's not just out to get us because it's Toronto.

[Clawson]

It’s remarkable how arrogant the fan base of a team with zero Stanley Cups, no Hall of Fame players, and two homoerotic Swedish twins that seem physically afraid of the playoffs can act. It’s literally mind-boggling! These days, when they’re not too busy demanding trades on local radio shows or reminiscing about that year they almost signed Wayne Gretzky, you can usually find Canucks fans preaching about how hosting Jarome Iginla and the Canadian Olympic team will finally establish their city as a genuine hockey town (sort of like how marrying Lamar Odom made Khloe Kardashian a real celebrity – legitimacy by association).

Next time you see a suspected pyramid schemer in the corner of a trendy wine bar sporting a $200 hair cut, $900 suit, and emanating a distinct air of scumbag from his Drakkar Noir-soaked pores - go ahead and ask him about Kevin Bieksa, because odds are he’s a Vancouver Canucks fan and doesn't want to cry himself to sleep again before throwing out obscene predictions about the Norris Trophy.

Plus Cox Bloc sums everything up way better than I can say it:

For those of you who don't know, I live in Vancouver. What does that mean? It means it's raining right now (this will be true at any time for the next six months). It means Starbucks outnumber bars about 45 to 1. It means one city of two million people where both daily papers are owned by CanWest and differ only in the number of syllables they use to say that homeless people, drug addicts, and the mentally ill should be chained to a garbage barge and sunk in the Georgia Strait. It means the Georgia Straight, an "alternative" newspaper devoted to multipage spreads on condo decoration and yoga trends. I know this blog is supposed to be devoted to the centre of the bad sportswriting universe, but as long as I am exiled here, far away from the land of the Buds, Labatt 50, and lakes that are warm enough to swim in, you can indulge me from time to time.

Worst of all, Vancouver means the Vancouver Canucks. The Canucks? I hear you say. Who cares? Indeed. That was my attitude before I came out here. You know, cute team, floundered around, Harold Snepts, never won anything, change their uniforms every laundry day. The Canucks. What you don't know is the combination of hockey ignorance (Sedins are first-liners), mindless boosterism (tons of people still love Bertuzzi) and an irrational hatred of the Leafs that means you have to take crap about 1967 from fans of a franchise that have never won anything. This is like Dane Cook ragging on Gene Hackman's acting career. I mean, he hasn't won Best Actor since 1971! What a loser!

Ugh. I'd managed to forget about most of this all summer, but made the mistake of listening to local drivetime jackholes Pratt and Taylor on the way home from work today. The lads were all jiggered up about Vancouver's sterling record in a bunch of games that don't count (here's a hint guys: Pittsburgh went 1-7 last year), frothing mad about the Star's prediction of a dead-last Canucks finish.

Particular ire was directed at a shot taken at franchise saviour Kyle Wellwood. "They just went on Google for five minutes and saw the picture of him with the beer belly and went with that." Yeah, or maybe they caught his own coach calling him out in training camp for showing up out of shape again. Either way.

Anyways, Pratt, Taylor, and the other guy in the booth passed around the one brain they share and decided that this was yet another example of the Toronto media having their knives out for the Canucks. Another chapter in the storied rivalry that reaches back through playing each other once a year (maybe) for the last decade and a half, to the 1994 conference finals, to that time in 1988 when Al Secord boarded Tony Tanti, or something. People in Vancouver honestly believe there is some sort of bitter feud going on here. Here's a quick memo for the next Canucks fans who wants to razz me over a beer. Here are the teams that Leafs fans hate:

1. Montreal Canadiens

2. Ottawa Senators

3. Philadelphia Flyers

4. Toronto Maple Leafs

------

345. Cleveland Crusaders

346. Belleville Bulls

347. Cracovia Krakow

348. Vancouver Canucks

349. Miller Chev-Olds Midnight Marauders

Look, it's not Toronto's fault the Canucks have no local rivals. Do an exhibition game with the Seatle Thunderbirds, maybe that'll get something going.

But the cherry on the failure cake was when the chuckleheads asked "Where'd they pick the Leafs"? "Oh, Stanley Cup, no doubt." Important point here: these guys wear Canucks shirts on the air. Can you imagine McCown in a Leafs shirt? You'd have to knock him out and staple it to his chest. But, yes, ho ho, the legendary suck up Toronto media.

Edited October 17, 2010 by Clawson

[Pizza]

Thanks for proving the point that our fanbase isn't the only one that douchebags looking to rile up people talk shit about.

[Clawson]

I'm just saying, there isn't a big persecutation (shush I put something else here) complex. It's more annoyance about random chirping about parade planning. It's tiring and having sportscasters from random teams make jokes when we're not even playing is even more annoying.

Oh well, thats one of the problems with not only being the most popular NHL franchise but the one with the longest Cup drought.

Edited October 17, 2010 by Clawson

[Plubby]

Toronto fans aren't even the worst at planning parades at stupid times...

....Does anyone else get the impression that it feels a little like 93?

[SeanDMan]

Posting from cellular phones doesn't always work right.

[SeanDMan]

You know, I'd respond to Clawson, but it turns out that if I don't, he'll continue ranting, raving, and reposting quotes from Leafs fan blogs, thus proving that he is small and insecure. It's kind of like arguing with a self loathing jew. Whether you keep arguing or not, at the end of the day you still win because deep down, they still hate themselves and their lives. I'm sorry Clawson. I wish I could give you a hug.

[SeanDMan]

Toronto fans aren't even the worst at planning parades at stupid times...

Ha. That reminds me of the time the Vancouver Province ran an (in jest) Plan The Parade contest for when we won the Stanley Cup. A Rangers fan went on and drew 1994 across the map. That shit was funny.

[Toe]

I am with Clawson. I am a Leafs fan, and I hate most other Leafs fans and all of the other local d-bags that make fun of the team despite knowing nothing at all about the team.

[Plubby]

I am with Clawson.

We know. Til death do you part.

[Toe]

I'm not married to him. We keep it casual.

[Toe]

What a frustrating game last night. The Leafs dominated play for the most part and played well defensively. We just ran into Dwayne Roloson, who has found the fountain of youth in the Air Canada Centre. Against any other netminder, the Leafs would have scored four. Still, I think the team can take away a lot of positives. They battled back to get the point, and not once did they look beaten or like a team that was giving up.

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

That's right Toe, losing to the Islanders is a good thing!

[Clawson]

The Islanders have gained points in 5 of 6 games thus far. They've been pretty good this year but they were absolutely dominated by us yesterday and if it wasn't for Roloson it would have been a 5-1 win. Actually all year we've run into hot goalies and we've been able to come away with the win. Not so lucky yesterday.

I think we need to get 2 points off the Rangers again on Thursday because they're gonna be one of the teams we're gonna battle for 8th. So we need to take advantage of them with Gaborik.

[Plubby]

With all due respect, Timmy Thomas...You are a ridiculous man. A .979 save%? Holy wow.