The Buscher

Wonder if he’ll go 0-269 like Curt Hawkins.

Jets sign Ty Montgomery to back up Le’Veon Bell.

That Ozuna play is actually the opposite of what I've seen a lot of this year - outfielders making a break for the ball only to realize they need to run another 20 feet back. Given how good skilled outfielders are at reading the ball off the bat and being able to tell from the crack of the bat how far back they'd need to go - that so many guys are midjudging it would tell me that the ball has once again been juiced.

Braves sign Ozzie Albies to a seven-year extension with two club options that could bring the total contract up to nine years, $45 million. He won't be a free agent until after his age 30 season. That is completely absurd. His agent needs to be fired.

The closest "connection" I have to a big leaguer is that Matt Barnes of the Red Sox is from my town and his dad is the CFO of the company I worked at for years. My cousin was a solid pitcher in high school but not good enough to be recruited by anybody other than D-3 schools which don't offer athletic scholarships. He's now playing baseball at my alma mater. I've just looked to see how they're doing and holy crap, what a weird stat line. They are 5-16 despite scoring 155 runs in 21 games (average of 7 per game). That's because their team ERA is 11.35. My cousin for his part has appeared in three games, surrending 14 ER in just 2.1 innings, for a cool ERA of 54.00. Fucking ouch.

Isles got outplayed tonight but still came away with the W in overtime. I’ll take it!

Ugh, Islanders have blown three leads including just now with 90 seconds left. Can’t say I feel optimistic about this series at all given the history between the teams.

Even though they're going to be paying him a lot of money for a long time, the Orioles have to seriously be considering just cutting bait with Davis at this point. His roster spot is more valuable than he is.

Can't say I'm surprised with the lackadaisical effort from the Mets today. I really don't know what they were thinking with scheduling their home opener to be a day game after a night game. They were already going to get home late, but then MLB provided the cherry on top with a random drug test after the game last night which delayed them even further. I don't think they got home until around 3 AM and they had to be back at the ballpark by 10. I know teams feel like the opener always needs to be a day game for tradition, but surely they could've made it a 4 PM start.

I want to have sex with Jacob deGrom.

Phillies contract offer: 13 years, $330 million Nationals contract offer: 12 years, $250 million with a lot of that money deferred until 2072 Nats fans made themselves look really bad by booing Bryce. Just like Yankee fans booing Cano, Red Sox fans booing Damon, and countless other examples over the years. Not one of these people wouldn't have taken the money.

SHANE MCMAHON SPOTTED AT AAF HEADQUARTERS!

The CBA expires after the 2021 season so that's likely to be when it happens. Guys are well served getting their money now and for guys like Syndergaard who have said they aren't interested in an extension are going to roll the dice on free agency anyway, they need to be careful with their money. Similarly I believe the NFLPA has been warning players for the last couple of seasons because a lockout after 2020 is a given there too.

With the Bogaerts extension, MLB teams have now guaranteed $4 billion in player salaries since November 1st, which shatters the previous record. This is coming on the heels of a report that the league encourages teams to suppress salaries in arbitration. MLB: "NO COLLUSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Xander Bogaerts joins the extension club. Seven years, $132 million.

Fuck Duke!

The Giants hired Dave Gettleman because he was a safe, organizational pick and because he was committed to building around Eli, which is precisely what Jthe change-resistant ownership wanted. And now every mock I've seen has the Giants are going drafting Dan Jones because he's the most Eli-like QB in the class and David Cutcliffe was the Mannings' QB coach. All of this just further makes me believe that the Manning family has John Mara's balls in a vice.

I've been cordial with all of the other promotions, but figured the mode would be fun if I was at war with at least one of them - and given the SmackDown talent roster I decided that would be the most fun show to try to poach from. AJ's morale was in the toilet - I offered him a juicy signing bonus and he came aboard. Kenny needed a night off, so I held an 8-man tournament which in my mind was for #1 contendership. Put AJ in the 8th spot in the bracket and imagined in my head that he was a surprise debut. He ended up winning the thing and then the next month he finally ended Kenny's title reign at 15 months.

Nice to open the season with a series win in Washington but my god, for a former pitching coach Mickey Callaway can’t manage a bullpen. Seven run lead and he’s using his second best reliever Seth Lugo. Clearly doesn’t have his best stuff, Mickey leaves him in to throw 40 pitches in the second game of the season which means he’s probably out for a few days. And Edwin Diaz ended up needing to close it out in an emergency.

It probably didn’t help Bryce that not long after he signed, a Philadelphia newspaper put out an article talking about how Bryce is slated to make more money per at-bat than the median household income for the entire city of Philadelphia.

Ughhhhhh, fuck Duke

For anyone who had money on how long it would take Phillies fans to boo Bryce Harper - the correct answer was the first game of the season.