Redemption From Humiliation

[I Don't Mind]

SHOCKING NEWS!

Newly hired writer, who’s name goes anonymous to the media has been shocking the creative team at every turn! After being harassed and humiliated from asking such a ridiculous question to a wrestler, the former Nickelodeon writer has been undergoing tutoring in writing for wrestling from various minds. She’s been said to be seen speaking with Kurt Angle, Paul Heyman, Jim Cornette before his release, Stone Cold Steve Austin, and The Undertaker. Her recent suggested ideas have left jaws agasp and speechless without mentioning any bad language such as “no fucking way” or “you’ve got to be shitting me”. The general consensus between the creative team, with the new writers’ thoughts added, the creative team have decided to go back to what failed and give it one last try with all their efforts. No this does not mean Mae Young needs to give birth to any other body parts, but look to see some old storylines revamped and with twists and turns everywhere.

[I Don't Mind]

Smackdown:

Date: September 1, 2005

Main Event Booked

After the opening pyros, Randy Orton starts off the show to a bombardment of boo’s from the audience. He entered the ring and took a microphone from the ring crew.

Orton: “Thank you, thank you, thank you. Your love for me is as greatly expressed as my love for you in return. At Summerslam, I completed a personal goal of mine, that I’ve had for the last 5 months. I killed the biggest legend here on Smackdown! Sure, I had to switch shows to do it, I had to pull out all the stops, I had to give up my blood, my sweat, and my tears to do it, but Damnit I did it and that makes me the best there is! I am Randy Orton, Legend Killer… Hear Me Roar. I’m now, without a doubt in anyone’s mind, the best, of the best here on Smackdown, and therefore…”

Orton is cut off by the music of the World Heavyweight Champion, The Animal, Batista. Batista comes out on stage in his suit, belt draped over his shoulder and microphone in hand.

Batista: “You know Randy, I think I see where you’re going with this. You want a title shot don’t you?”

Orton grins and nods his head at this in approval.

Batista: “Well frankly Randy, it would be a pleasure to kick your ass again. Just like on RAW, I’ll tear you limb from limb. Speaking of which how’s your arm? Last time I saw you, I was ripping it out of it’s socket! I hope its at 100% this time Randy, because when I get in the ring tonight, it seems to me like it would be fun to tear it clean off and beat you with it!”

Orton: “You think your so big and bad Batista, but I know the real Dave Batista, and he’s nothing but a softy. Your weak in the head Dave, and just like in Evolution, I’ll show that I’m a bigger star than you any day of the week! So bring your ass down here, and lets do this right now!”

Batista gets cocky and begins to make his way down the ramp, when he stops to the music of Theodore Long. Long comes out on stage with a microphone in hand himself.

Long: “Now hold on a minute playas! If we’re gonna do this thang, we’re gonna do it right! This ain’t gonna be no all out brawl, this is gonna be an official World Heavyweight Title match, and we got rules here, and we got restrictions. But Randy Orton vs. Batista, The Legend Killer vs. The Animal… Holla, Holla, Holla, I like the sound of that playas! So it’s decided, tonight, in the main event, Randy Orton, you’ll get your title shot against Batista! Now Believe Dat playas!”

Rating: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

Animal and Heidenreich vs. Juvi and Psychosis w/Super Crazy - Tag Team Titles

A good opening match between the two teams. The New Road Warriors showed their size and power advantage on the Mexicools, but the Mexicools were too quick for the two monsters. Heidenreich crushed Juvi with the Sidewalk Slam, but as he made the cover Psychosis nailed him in the back of the head with a Guillotine Legdrop. Animal managed to break up the cover as Juvi draped his arm over Heidenreich. At the peak of the match, Heidenreich got the hot tag and began to clear house. Super Crazy got in the ring but got thrown right back out. Animal and Heidenreich crushed Psychosis with a double Spinebuster. The two then leveled Juvi with the Doomsday Device for the three count.

Winners: New Road Warriors

Overall Rating: 72

Crowd Rating: 70

Match Rating: 74

Popularity Contest:

Backstage MNM along with Jillian Hall were in the interview area with Josh Matthews.

Josh: “MNM, tonight Joey Mercury faces off against…”

Jillian Hall shoots Josh Matthews a dirty look then snatches the microphone out of his hand.

Jillian: “Faces? Like my face Josh? That’s what you were thinking about when you were asking your question wasn’t it? Don’t lie to me Josh! Just leave! It’s true I have a deformity on my face, but I am not some sort of side-of-the-road circus-freak show to be stared at! But this interview isn’t about me, it’s about Joey Mercury. I can’t even say that tonight Joey Mercury will be competing against Nunzio for his Cruiserweight Title… because it won’t be competition. It’s going to be a massacre. Joey Matthews is going to bloody Nunzio, then TAKE his Cruiserweight Title. All thanks to the “Fixer” of MNM, Jillian Hall.”

Melina: “Tsk, I can’t believe Nunzio is holding a title in the first place. Titles are meant for the best, and how do you know when you’re the best? When you’re the most popular, when you’re the most loved, when you’re constantly reminded that you are the best! And is that not what MNM is? Come on boys… we’ve got ANOTHER popularity contest to win.”

Melina and Jillian Hall strut off leaving Nitro and Mercury behind.

Mercury: “Did you hear Jillian Hall saying I’ll win the title because of her? Ha! That’s a laugh.”

Nitro: “Yeah, you’re telling me. Good help is so hard to find these days.”

Mercury: “Or… at least good LOOKING help!”

The two shudder clearly thinking about Jillian Hall’s deformity.

Overall: 88

::Fade To Commercial::

Joey Mercury w/Nitro, Melina, and Jillian Hall vs. Nunzio w/Big Vito - Cruiserweight Title

The two showed off some good Cruiserweight action, but would have been more suited for the opening match or on Velocity. Nunzio being the better technical wrestler, wrestled circles around Joey Mercury, not to mention Nunzio’s large associate, Big Vito, cheating for him on the outside. Nunzio wasn’t the only one with some outside assistance, because of course Nitro, Melina and Jillian Hall were on the outside of the ring. The end came when as Melina was distracting the referee, Jillian Hall slid the Cruiserweight title in to Joey Mercury, but it slid between his legs and Nunzio caught it, clocking Mercury over the head with it. This angered Mercury’s partner Nitro, and thus entered the ring and tackled Nunzio, pounding away at him as the referee took noticed and rang the bell. Vito quickly slid into the ring and a brawl between MNM and The Italian Connection soon erupted until a swarm of referees and officials could pull them all apart.

Winner: Nunzio via DQ

Overall Rating: 67

Crowd Rating: 62

Match Rating: 74

A New Side Of Rey

We see Funaki backstage by Rey’s locker room door.

Funaki: “This is Funaki, Smackdown’s NUMBER ONE ANNOUNCER! And I am outside the door of Rey Mysterio’s locker room. Funaki is here to get a word with Rey Mysterio, but he has yet to come to the door. I keep knocking but there is no answer, so I am just going to let myself in.”

Funaki creeks the door open slowly until it’s open all the way, where we see Rey Mysterio sitting on the other side of a pitch dark room staring at a picture of Dominic surrounded by lit candles.

Funaki: “I am here with Rey Mysterio, Rey…”

Mysterio: “Get out.”

Funaki: “But Rey, the people want to know, how do you feel after…”

Mysterio: “Funaki. Leave. NOW!”

The camera zooms in on the back of Rey’s head which has yet to turn around.

Overall: 80

Simon Dean vs. Rey Mysterio

We cut to the ring where Simon Dean is coming out to the ring to his music, carrying his duffle bag. Dean begins to do pushups and squat-thrusts in the ring as everyone awaits Rey Mysterio. Mysterio’s music hits to a pop but about half way through the music, still no Mysterio. The music starts over but still no Rey Mysterio. The bell is rung and Simon Dean jogs in place in the corner of the ring as the referee counts Rey Mysterio out.

Winner: Simon Dean via countout

Overall: 76

::Fade To Commercial::

During The Commercial…

We see Rey Mysterio walking around in the parking lot with his street clothes on, carrying his duffle bag. Mysterio throws his bag in the back of a rent-a-car and peels rubber.

Overall: 88

WCW Elite Team

Chris Benoit is shown backstage in the locker room taping up his wrists when Booker T and Sharmelle approach.

Benoit: “Booker.”

Booker: “Yo, Benoit Man. Tonight man, we’re partners against those two Suckas, JBL and Orlando Jordan. We both got a bad history with JBL’s Cabinet, but you and me got a lot of history too dog.”

Benoit: “We sure do Book, we put on some amazing matches together in WCW”

Booker: “Exactly man, Best Of 7 Series Boy. That’s what I’m talking about! Every night, you and me went in and blew the roof off that place man! I know you can dig that man! I know you can! Tonight, together lets do the same thing man.”

Benoit: “Yeah, that’s all well and good Booker, but Orlando Jordan’s beat me twice now. And frankly I’m getting a little sick of losing to him! So tonight, I’m going to tear him apart, and I suggest you just don’t get in the way.”

Booker: “You didn’t say that. Sharmelle baby doll, tell me… he didn’t… just… say that! Look baby, a wise man once said, don’t hate the player… hate the game. It’s not just Orlando Jordan, it’s The Cabinet man. So tonight lets go out there and beat their punk asses! Now can you dig that! SUCKA!”

Overall: 76

The Cabinet vs. Booker and Benoit

A clash of styles, where all contestants brought it all to the table. The Cabinet managed to isolate Booker with quick tags and illegal double teams. JBL forced OJ to wrestle more of the match then him, due to him being banged up from his match at Summerslam. At the end, Orlando had Booker T on the top rope for a Superplex, but Booker shoved him off and hit him with a Missile Dropkick. Booker made the hot tag to Benoit who tore Orlando apart, just as he said he was going to. JBL made the blind tag as Jordan got thrown off the ropes and Benoit locked OJ in the Crossface to make him submit, but he was no longer the legal man. JBL cheap shotted Benoit but the “Wrestling God” couldn’t hold control of the match and soon found himself tapping to the Crippler Crossface himself.

Winners: Booker and Benoit

Overall Rating: 78

Crowd Rating: 81

Match Rating: 72

::Fade To Commercial::

Peep Show

Christian is hosting the Peep Show tonight in the center of the ring.

Christian: “Tonight, my guest is a man who is anything but a loser. sure It took him a few tries but after continually falling off the horse, what do you do? Get right back up and steal the horse’s kid away! That’s right, tonight my guest is none other than Latino Heat! Eddie Guerrero!”

Eddie Guerrero comes down to the ring, holding the hand of his “Son” Dominic. Eddie takes a microphone from ringside.

Guerrero: “Christian homes… it’s an honor ese.”

Christian: “Eddie, the peeps want to know, don’t you think what you did to Rey Mysterio was a tad on the low side? Wasn’t it a little underhanded and sneaky and manipulative and even cruel… even for you?”

Guerrero: “What are you kidding me ese? I’m just starting to show my REAL Latino Heat! I showed the peeps as you call them, that NOBODY BEATS EDDIE GUERRERO! EDDIE ALWAYS COMES OUT ON TOP!”

Christian: “OK Eddie, before you break out in a mariachi dance, can you explain to us why Dominic betrayed Rey Mysterio?”

Eddie: “Oh yeah, that. Man that was a work of beauty wasn’t it Christian? It was art in motion! But I have to correct you homes, he didn’t betray Rey… he showed pride in his family name! He accepted that he really is a Guerrero! He came out and helped his dad! He joined his father, and assisted me to sweep the rug right out from underneath Rey’s feet.”

Christian: “Eddie, you are a true mastermind. I got to tell you, it warms me and my peeps’ hearts to see a father and son unite.”

Christian is cut off by Batista’s music who comes down for his match. Eddie and Christian bail out of the ring and Batista single-handedly dismantles the Peep Show set. Batista leans over the ropes and spits by where Eddie was standing, showing his disgust for Latino Heat, and his dirty underhanded tactics.

Overall: 86

Batista vs. Randy Orton - World Heavyweight Title

The Animal manhandled Randy Orton through much of this match, specifically working on Orton’s arm. Orton did manage to score some cheap shots to even the score though. The action was back and forth and brutal to match. Orton having the agility and speed advantage helped him take control of the match at the end as Batista began to slow down. Orton’s arrogance got the better of him however and Orton soon found himself on the receiving end of a big Spinebuster followed by a Batista Bomb for the three count. As Batista celebrated with his World Heavyweight Title, Orton nailed him with a kick between the legs, but it didn’t down the Animal, so Orton hit him with the RKO then posed over him with the belt in hand.

Winner: Batista

Overall Rating: 82

Crowd Rating: 88

Match Rating: 70

Show Rating: 78

Edited August 18, 2005 by Inner D Monz

[thuganomic]

Very nice show. I enjoyed the Jillian Hall promo. Good match lengths, and the format is very accessible. Keep up the good work. I look forward to the Batista-Guerrero feud, and to see what's next for Rey.

[I Don't Mind]

News and Velocity Preview:

News:

At a house show event, Kane tore his bicep jumping off the top rope for a Clothesline from the inside of the ring to the outside. He is unfortunately expected to be out for at least 6-7 months. This was a great disappointment as the creative team had storylines lined up for him.

The McMahon family is said to be quite pleased with the ratings for Smackdown.

Down in OVW there are some eyes watching closely on Kid Kash, CM Punk, and Johnny Jeter among others. Some are speculating a call up of them soon.

Velocity Card:

Big Vito vs. Joey Mercury

Simon Dean in action!

Main Event: Paul London vs Super Crazy

[I Don't Mind]

Velocity:

Date: September 3, 2005

After the opening pyros, Nunzio and Big Vito come down to the ring. The two Italians climb into the ring and take a microphone from ring crew.

Big Vito: “Hey liddle Nunzio, can you believe deez guys MNM? Dey jump you in your Cruiserweight title match like a pair of vigliacchi. Dey dink dat dey are betta then us? Do dey know who we are? We be da Italians! Ain’t nobody messes with da Italians without suffering the consequences!”

Nunzio: “And the consequences are right in this ring Big Vito. Dey’re going to learn now what an Italian beating feels like! Because their’s no beating like an Italian beating!”

Overall: 65

::Fade To Commercial::

Big Vito w/Nunzio vs Joey Mercury w/Nitro, Melina, and Hall

Vito laid a beating on Mercury, holding the clear power advantage. Mid-match, Joey Mercury managed to score a low-blow on Vito, and take the match into his favor. Mercury managed to keep the match under his belt until Vito hit a clothesline that turned him inside out. Mercury tried to throw Vito to the outside for Nitro to attack, but Vito struck first and laid him out. The match came to a conclusion when Vito went for a Full Nelson Slam on Mercury, but Mercury wrapped his legs around Vito’s blocking the move, and rolling him up with a Victory Roll, using the tights for leverage for the three. MNM made a dash up the aisle as Nunzio and Vito looked on angrily.

Winner: Joey Mercury

Overall Rating: 67

Crowd Rating: 60

Match Rating: 74

EC ‘Dub Challenge

Backstage we see Simon Dean walking around in his wrestling gear with his duffle bag. He stops and gets a sickened look on his face as the camera pans out and we see Tazz talking to co-former ECW wrestler, Axl Rotten.

Dean: “Oh my god! Tazz, you really shouldn’t let the truck drivers in the arena. Their job is to drop off the merchandise and leave. Now please buddy… oh my god… look at yourself man! Your girth is overflowing over your belt! Cover yourself up man! There are children present! This arena is used for professional wrestling, which is all about being fit and in shape!”

Rotten: “Oh is that so? You know I used to be a wrestler. And I was in the same shape then, as I am now. Incase you don‘t know who I am, I‘m Axl Rotten!”

Dean: “Sir… sumo wrestling doesn’t count, ok? And neither does wrestling with your eighth hot dog. So Fatso Rotten, I really don‘t think you can even be held on the same level of comparison as an athlete such as myself.”

Rotten: “You know what punk? I think it’s time you and me cut the chit-chat and took it to the ring! I’ll show you what this girth can do, when I take you… to the extreme!”

Simon Dean snickers and nods his head as he walks off leaving Tazz and Axl Rotten grinning at one another.

Overall: 57

::Fade To Commercial::

Axl Rotten vs Simon Dean

Not being ECW, Axl couldn’t really show too much of his talent, but managed to throw out some powerhouse maneuvers on Dean. Dean had a hard time keeping the big man down, but took things up a notch by choking him until the referee pulled him off. The match took a real big turn for the spectacular when the two spilled out onto the outside. It was almost as though they fell through the gates of ECW where Simon Dean was Nova and Axl Rotten was… well Axl Rotten. Everything from the steps, barricade, ring apron and steel ring post were used. Once the action took itself back into the ring, Axl had accidentally slingshotted Simon Dean into the referee in the corner. Dean scored with a field-goal like kick between the legs of Axl Rotten then went to the outside where he got a steel chair. Dean pranced around the ring with the chair for a while as Axl pulled himself to his feet. Dean swung the chair at Axl but Rotten managed to duck it. Out of nowhere former ECW superstar Balls Mahoney slid into the ring with a chair of his own and knocked Dean’s chair into his own face with it! Axl got the three count as the referee reawoken and the ECW Chair Swinging Freaks celebrated together.

Winner: Axl Rotten

Overall Rating: 64

Crowd Rating: 57

Match Rating: 72

Mexicools Suspended!

The Mexicools are hanging out backstage when Theodore Long approaches them.

Long: “Ah, I’m glad I caught ya playas. As you know, tonight Super Crazy faces Paul London in the main event. And also as you know, you all have a habit of interfering in one another‘s matches.”

The Mexicools all laugh and nod their head.

Long: “Well that’s just not gonna happen tonight playas. Frankly I’m tired of it, and if I catch either you Juvi, or you Psychosis anywhere near that ring tonight I’ll personally suspend each of you for one year without pay! Now believe dat!”

As Long walks away The Mexicools’ expression changes to frustrated. Super Crazy then steps behind Psychosis and Juvi, putting a hand on each of their shoulders and begins whispering in their ear. The three begin laughing as the camera fades out.

::Fade To Commercial::

Oops, They Did It Again!

We see Paul London lacing up his boots in the locker room. He makes his way for the door but it gets slammed right into his face, knocking him down. The door opens again and all three Mexicools enter and begin stomping away at London. They pick him up and launch him face first into the concrete wall. They turn over the benches onto him before laughing and leaving.

Juvi: “Crazy will see you in the ring Gringo! If you can manage to make it there that is!”

Overall: 69

Paul London vs Super Crazy

After a long period of time of everyone waiting for London to make his entrance, and Super Crazy relaxing in the corner, Paul London finally makes his way down to the ring to everyone’s surprise. London opens up on Crazy like a man possessed, showing off every one of his most hard hitting maneuvers. Crazy managed to turn the tables when he countered a Frankensteiner into a top rope Powerbomb. With Crazy in control, he slammed London down in the corner of the ring, then stepped out onto the apron. Crazy jumped over the top rope to go for a Springboard Moonsault but London dodged it. Crazy pulled himself up, holding his abdomen as he sat on his heels, until London nailed him with a running knee to the back of the head. London climbed to the top rope and crushed Crazy with the 450 Splash for the three count.

Winner: Paul London

Overall Rating: 75

Crowd Rating: 58

Match Rating: 93

Show Rating: 57

Heat Preview:

CM Punk vs Viscera

Chris Masters vs The Hurricane

Val Venis and Tajiri vs The Heart Throbs

The French Phenom Rene Dupree will also be in action!

[I Don't Mind]

Heat:

Date: September 4, 2005

Big Vis In The House!

Viscera is seen backstage in the interview area with Maria.

Maria: “Viscera, tonight you face… umm… who was it again… JC Penny? No that wasn’t it. Washington DC? No, no, don’t tell me. I’ll get this. BJ Johnson? No that was a boy I dated in the seventh grade…”

Viscera: “Maria… baby, it’s a good thing you’ve got looks. Why don’t you let me handle this baby doll.”

Viscera takes the microphone from Maria as she walks off screen.

Viscera: “Tonight I face off against CM Punk, who’s been getting a big amount of hype here. I don’t see what the big deal about CM Punk is, but who gets bigger hype… or bigger amounts of ANYTHING then Big Vis? CM baby, tonight I’m taking you on a midnight journey of love. We’re gonna cruise together through my darkness and then you’ll find at the end of the tunnel a big ol’ case… of Visagra. See you in the ring boy.”

Overall: 72

CM Punk vs Viscera

Viscera made Punk’s match a comedic episode, but Punk took it very serious. Punk used his speed advantage to slip out of most of Viscera’s powerhouse moves. Unfortunately for Punk near the end of the match he did find himself getting sodimized by the World’s Largest Love Machine. After being humiliated so horribly, Punk escaped from the ring and almost got himself counted out, but at nine slipped back into the ring and took Viscera to a whole new level of pain. After a big Scoop Slam on CM Punk, Viscera went for the Big Splash, but Punk rolled out of the way. The two got back up to their feet, but not for long as CM Punk kicked Viscera in the gut and planted him with the Devil’s Lock DDT for the three count.

Winner: CM Punk

Overall Rating: 64

Crowd Rating: 65

Match Rating: 65

::Fade To Commercial::

SXE Is Born!

CM Punk and Vicki Adams are seen celebrating Punk's victory backstage in the hallways, on their way to the locker room, when Punk bumps into someone rather rudely. They turn around and it’s none other then Rob Van Dam who’s still on the shelf from a knee injury.

RVD: “Hey man, I saw your match. Your pretty good. Of course you’re a long way from being R-V-D.”

CM Punk: “RVD… I know exactly who you are. I know everything about you! I remember back in your ECW Days… RVD 4:20! You make me sick! You pump your blood full of poison then act like your better then everyone else!”

RVD: “Hey, look man. What I do is my own business. I don’t get all up in your face for dressing like a freak. And I suppose you think your better then Mr. Monday Night, CM Punk?”

CM Punk: “Think I’m better? I know I’m better! Your looking at CM Punk, the Straight Edge Superstar of the future! Incase you’ve inhaled too much of that poison Rob, let me break that down for you. Straight Edge means no drugs, no alcohol, and no promiscuous sex! Or to summarize all that for you, Straight Edge means I’m better than you.”

RVD: “I don’t believe my ears. Hey everybody, the new guy thinks he’s better then me! He thinks he’s better than Mr. Monday Night ROB VAN DAM! Let me tell you something rookie, they don’t call me the whole damn show for nothing! You’ve got a long ways to go before you’ll even be a remote contender for me!”

CM Punk: “Oh is that so? Well Rob, if you in fact are so much better than me… why am I the one standing… and you’re the one on the ground crying like a little bitch!”

And with that CM Punk gave RVD’s injured knee a stiff boot, dropping him to the concrete holding his leg. Punk laid in several stomps onto Van Dam’s leg, then into his ribs with Vicki Adams cheering him on. Punk placed his boot under RVD’s chin across his throat choking the life out of him until a swarm of referees could pull him away. As Punk and Vicki Adams backed out of the sceen they made Punk's Straight Edge signal and laughed at Van Dam's pain.

Overall: 75

The Hurricane w/Super Stacy vs Chris Masters

A good solid match, with a lot of back and forth action. The Hurricane played the lovable underdog in this match and got a lot of intensity from the crowd. Masters played the generic bad guy powerhouse, doing things like lifting Hurricane up for a running Powerslam, only to get shoved into the turnbuckles and schoolboyed. Hurricane tried to clothesline Masters over the top rope but Masters held on and landed on the apron. Hurricane nailed Masters with the Hurri-Kick that sent him to the concrete. With the referee watching Masters intently counting him out, Snitsky ran down the aisle and slid into the ring, leveling Hurricane with a Big Boot. Snitsky exited the ring as Masters reentered and locked on the Master Lock for the submission victory. Rosey ran down the aisle but with his partner incapacitated, the combined efforts of Masters and Snitsky were far too much for Rosey and after Masters held Rosey in the Master Lock and Snitsky cracked him over the head with a steel chair, the Tag Team Champions were left down and out at the hands of Snitsky and Masters.

Winner: Chris Masters

Overall Rating: 71

Crowd Rating: 65

Match Rating: 77

The Odd Couple

Before Masters and Snitsky leave, Masters grabs a microphone.

Masters: "What you’ve seen here tonight is history in the making. The alliance of two masterpieces! One resembling a work by Michelangelo, and the other resembling a work of Picasso’s. Not that this man Snitsky is any less beautiful then me, or any better looking or anything at all, NO! He is just misunderstood. You have to scratch away the outer layer that is Snitsky to find his true purpose and meaning! I understand a man like Snitsky because I myself am a Masterpiece, just like him! Snitsky is a man, not a monster but a man, who is looking for one thing in this industry! And that is success. I can respect that. Who among us doesn’t want success? At the workplace, in fatherhood, or even in the sac with a woman? Not that anyone here would know what that’s like, but you know what I’m getting at! So us masterpieces, are here to redecorate this business! And we are going to do it by any means necessary! We’ll paint the town red… even if that means tearing it apart first."

Overall: 67

::Fade To Commercial::

Tajiri and Val Venis vs The Heart Throbs

Though the match started off in Tajiri and Venis’ favor, The Heart Throbs began to isolate Tajiri and wear him down. Using cheap tactics like choking Tajiri with the tag rope while his partner distracted the referee, and assaulting Tajiri on the outside of the ring, The Heart Throbs held control of this match for a good period of time. Not until Tajiri nailed the Heart Throbs with a Double Springboard Back Elbow and made the tag to Val Venis did the tables turn. Venis opened up on The Heart Throbs and even began to double team with Tajiri. Tajiri would spray Antonio with the Mist, causing him to back up into a schoolboy by Venis, but Romeo broke it up. An all out brawl broke out between all four contestants at the end. Romeo Back Body Dropped Tajiri over the top rope onto the concrete floor, then the Heart Throbs laid Venis out with a Double Flatliner, which their now calling the Party Down, for the three count.

Winners: The Heart Throbs

Overall Rating: 72

Crowd Rating: 64

Match Rating: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

Open American Challenge

The French Phenom, Rene Dupree came out to the ring to his music and grabbed a microphone, much to the crowd’s discontent.

Dupree: “Greetings, fat, American slobs. Look at you all, sitting there on your porky behinds feeing your even porkier children! Your disgusting drool, oozing out of your disgusting mouths! I grow weary of this country and all it’s ignorance! I bet you all want me to just move back to Canada where people aren’t such losers, don’t you!?”

The crowd burst at the opportunity to get rid of Dupree.

Dupree: “Well since your all wanting this so bad, lets see if my opponent tonight can send me packing! I challenge any American born imbecile in that locker room to come out and face the French Phenom!”

Surprisingly Danny Basham’s music hits, and the former Smackdown Superstar comes out on stage in American Flag styled tights. Basham slid into the ring and without saying a word, the two got it on!

Overall: 69

Rene Dupree vs Danny Basham

A brutal match between the two that surprisingly was the most exciting of the night. The crowd showed their patriotism, constantly chanting U-S-A, U-S-A. Basham would draw his energy from the U-S-A chants and would floor Dupree with everything from Back Elbows, to Back Body Drops, to right hands to Clotheslines and Scoop Slams. Dupree stole control of the match after a knee to the gut though and even managed to open Basham’s head up. Basham quickly gained control back over the match though and after ducking a clothesline and delivering a right hand to the gut of Dupree, Basham left Dupree down and out with a Gutwrench Powerbomb for the three count. Basham celebrated a victory by exiting the ring and pulling an American Flag out from underneath the ring apron. Dupree slid to the outside though and blindsided Basham, throwing him head first into the steel steps, then throwing him into the audience before leaving. Surprisingly, in an ECW like manner, no one got out of the way of Basham, and instead helped him to his feet. The final shot before fading out was a bloody Danny Basham surrounded by his fellow Americans, treating him like a hero.

Winner: Danny Basham

Overall Rating: 76

Crowd Rating: 72

Match Rating: 80

Show Rating: 60

RAW Preview:

Kurt Angle vs Edge vs Big Show

A Big Announcement By Vince McMahon Regarding Unforgiven!

Return Of Triple H!

RAW’s Superheroes vs The Masterpieces

Eugene vs Shelton Benjamin for the Number One Contendership for the IC Title

And more!

[Guest FlyboyGJ]

I'm liking this so far. I like your match reports also.. not so short where we don't get any info on the match, but also not some huge long detailed thing. Just enough for us to get a gist of what happened in the match. They are perfect.

[Thatz]

This is pretty good so far, but I don't like how a feud seemed to start between Punk and RVD on Heat...not enough people watch that show to make it worth starting anything like that on there. That should've been on RAW.

[I Don't Mind]

RAW

Date: September 5, 2005

SXE Highlights

The pyros for RAW go off and we find Chris Jericho standing in the middle of the ring, surrounded by the set of The Highlight Reel. Jericho gets some heavy heat from the fans.

Y2J: “Will all you assclowns please! Shut! The hell! Up! Tonight on the highlight reel, we welcome a man who is revolutionizing this industry. He doesn’t go around drinking, or smoking, or screwing anything that moves. No! This guy has so much potential it’s coming out the wazoo! He doesn’t know what to do with it all! Within the next few years, he could even be the next Chris Jericho! Shocking, I know. Who could possibly be the next coming of The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla ? What god-sent creature could ever be the next Highlight Of The Night? This man, ladies and gentlemen, Mr. CM Punk!”

CM Punk comes down the aisle with Vicki Adams and climbs into the ring with Chris Jericho, taking a microphone from the stage crew.

Punk: "Chris, it’s an honor. You know, Fozzy is one of the few Metal bands I listen to, mainly because it doesn’t send any non-Straight Edge remarks."

Y2J: “Why thank you CM. That’s a beautiful girl you’ve got by your side, what’s your name princess?”

Vicki Adams just crosses her arms in a Straight Edge fashion and shoots Jericho a dirty look.

Y2J: “What’s the matter gorgeous? Cat got your tongue?”

Punk: “Maybe she doesn’t answer to you. Maybe she only answers to people who are truly Straight Edge, like myself. But to field your question, this is my girlfriend Vicki Adams. She’s taken a vow of silence to all those who poison themselves with alcohol, drugs, or any sort of promiscuous sex. But that’s not why we’re here, to talk about Vicki, are we Chris?”

Y2J: “You’re absolutely right, and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to impose on your relationship. Lets talk about why you are here CM Punk. Wait hold on, CM Punk, it’s getting so irritating to say, what the hell does CM stand for anyways?”

Punk: “CM stands for none of your [~bleep!~] business, that’s what it stands for!”

Y2J: “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Sorry Junior, just thought I’d inform all the Jerichoholics who the man behind the initials was. Take it easy, I wouldn’t wanna end up like Rob Van Dam Sunday. Speaking of which, let’s roll the footage on the obscenely expensive Jeri-Tron 5000!”

A video of CM Punk’s brutal assault on Rob Van Dam is shown from Sunday Night heat.

Punk: “What a beauty it is watching myself work.”

Y2J: “I must say Punk, you show a certain aggressiveness that is really missing here on RAW. It’s quite impressive. Infact…”

Jericho is cut off when RVD’s music hits. Van Dam wobbles down the ramp way as Vicki Adams, CM Punk, and Chris Jericho all mock him. As he approaches the ring, Punk goes for a baseball slide, but Van Dam dodges it. RVD fires off some right hands and some forearm shots to the face. RVD holds control until Vicki Adams slides outside and jumps on Van Dam’s back with a sleeper hold. Punk fires off some shots on RVD now, then slams him face-first into the steel steps. Punk delivers some kicks to RVD’s injured leg, then lifts up the steel steps and drops it right on Van Dam’s leg. Jericho watches gleefully as Punk and Adams leave showing the Straight Edge symbol.

Overall: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

Heart Throbbing For Who?

The Heart Throbs music hits as the two come down to the ring in their wrestling gear, throwing out their goofy dance moves. Val Venis’ music hits next much to the ladies’ delight. Venis comes out on stage with a microphone in hand.

Venis: “… HELLOOO LADIES!”

Of course this gets a big pop.

Venis: “You know something ladies, I’ve been watching these two guys in the ring, Antonio and Romeo, the Heart Throbs. You know what I’ve noticed? They couldn’t get a girl with chloroform! Look at those dance moves fella’s, do those woo anyone? You know what those dance moves say to me, to the guys in the back, and alllll these people out here and at home? They say “Viiiiiirrgiiiiin, Viiiiiirrgiiiiin, Viiiiiirrgiiiiin””

The crowd begins to chant Venis’ mockery towards the Heart Throbs, making them irritable.

Venis: “So tonight, it’s going to be The Heart Throbs vs. The Big Valboski, and a man who I KNOW, knows how to woo the ladies, the world’s larges Love Machine, Viscera!”

Venis drops the microphone as Viscera comes out on stage with him. The two teams stare each other down for a moment then charge the ring to start the match.

Overall: 68

The Heart Throbs vs. Val Venis and Viscera

Venis and Viscera held the advantage through the start of this match, having the clear power and experience advantage. However after Venis trying to finish the match quickly with an early Money Shot on Romeo, Antonio shoved him off the top rope, getting straddled on the ropes. The Heart Throbs took advantage of Venis, wearing him down with quick tags. Venis made the tag mid-match to Viscera who plowed through The Heart Throbs like they were nothing. It wasn’t long however before The Heart Throbs cheated again to take control of the match when Romeo hung Viscera out over the top rope. The two worked on Viscera until a double clothesline floored Viscera and Antonio. A double tag was made and Venis was about to clear house, until after a whip off the ropes to Romeo, Romeo hit a baseball slide on Viscera rolling him out of the ring under the bottom rope. This left Venis alone with the Heart Throbs who quickly nailed the Party Down for the three count.

Winners: The Heart Throbs

Overall Rating: 68

Crowd Rating: 64

Match Rating: 73

::Fade To Commercial::

McMahon’s Big Announcement!

Vince McMahon’s music hits as he struts down to the ring. He takes a microphone from the ring crew, but the crowd doesn’t know how to respond to him.

Vince: “September 18, is Unforgiven. Unforgiven is where scores are settled and people get aggressive in taking vengeance out via their anger. So I ask you, who knows more about getting even, being aggressive and anger in general then the man who’s going to make a special appearance at Unforgiven? At Unforgiven, Chris Jericho will personally host on his Highlight Reel a man who’s been MIA from RAW for too long! This man is none other than Stone Cold Steve Austin! The Rattlesnake will tell what he’s been doing these last few months, what he thinks of what’s been happening here, and damnit I guarantee it to be explosive! Thank you all, very much.”

The camera cuts backstage where we see CM Punk and Vicki Adams staring intently at monitor, with no smiles present.

Overall: 94

Masterpiece Recap

Because WWE is sympathetic that not everyone watches WWE Heat on Sundays, they played a recap from Heat to show the formation of The Masterpieces, Chris Masters and Snitsky. However the crowd didn’t really seem to care all that much.

Overall: 54

RAW's Super Heroes w/Super Stacy vs. Masterpieces

A good brawling styled match between the four contestants, but neither team seemed to be able to hold the control of the match for long. Hurricane got a huge pop when he got the hot tag from Rosey and started clearing house by diving off the top rope with a Flying Crossbody onto both Snitsky and Masters. Hurricane to the surprise of many didn’t have the opportunity to play the underdog in the match, because he was dominating more than any one competitor in the match. The end came when Rosey and Masters duked it out in the ring while Snitsky stalked Super Stacy up the ramp way, only to get ambushed by The Hurricane. With Hurricane and Snitsky firing off right hands on one another, in the ring Masters managed to lock Rosey in the Masterlock for the submission victory.

Winners: Masterpieces

Overall Rating: 74

Crowd Rating: 69

Match Rating: 79

::Fade To Commercial::

Game On!

Triple H and Ric Flair are seen walking backstage together in their thousand dollar suits. They knock on the door of Eric Bischoff and then just walk in.

Eric: “Hunter, Ric, how nice of you two to FINNALLY come back to RAW.”

Triple H: “I take it you missed us Eric.”

Eric: “Actually not really Hunter, it’s actually been a nice relief without you here.”

Triple H: “Yeah, I’m sure. Listen Eric, I’ve had some time to think things through and I wanted to formally apologize for walking out. And now that Batista is officially off of my show, RAW… I’d like an opportunity to redeem myself in your eyes by taking my title off of that punk John Cena.”

Eric: “Let me get this straight Hunter. You think you can leave my show unannounced for over a month, then waltz back in and request a title match? Hey, I hate John Cena as much as the next guy. And I want that title he wears over his shoulder so arrogantly, to disappear faster then a set of rims at a puff daddy concert, but if you think I’m giving you a title shot, your out of your mind!”

Triple H: “Eric, I am not someone you want to screw around with. I am no longer asking, I am no demanding, I want Cena and I want my title BACK! If my demands are not met Eric…”

Eric: “Then you’ll do what exactly? Run back home for another month or two like you did to get away from Batista?”

Triple H: “That’s not funny. This isn’t over Eric! You’ll give me my title shot one way or another!”

Triple H and Flair backed out of Bischoff’s office with a mean look on their faces.

Overall: 81

Shelton Benjamin vs. Eugene Dinsmore - Number One Contendership For IC Title

Shelton and Eugene put on an excellent technical match full of good sportsmanship. Carlito came out and began to do commentary with J.R. and Jerry Lawler, mocking both competitors. The crowd were indecisive on who to cheer for, but each of the superstars got a fairly good reaction. Eugene pulled his comedy antics, such as the Airplane Spin getting both him and Shelton dizzy. Shelton pulled out some amazing acrobatics like a Springboard Bulldog. Shelton managed to hit the T-Bone Suplex on an unsuspecting Eugene, but as he went for the cover, the lights went out. After a few moments of total darkness, Shelton was found down and out. Eugene saw this and capitalized on the moment by making the cover for the three count.

Winner: Eugene

Overall Rating: 75

Crowd Rating: 69

Match Rating: 82

Rematch Challenge!

Edge and Lita are backstage in the locker room and Lita has a neck brace on.

Edge: “You see this Matt? Zoom in on her neck! You see this?! This is what you did to her. Your ex-girlfriend. I hope your happy Matt. I hope your prancing around on your little stupid website with all your internet nerds laughing hysterically about how much pain she’s in! Well it’s just a small fraction of the pain I’m going to put you through Matt! If you think I’m done with you, your dead wrong! This thing between us isn’t going to end until one of us is dead! So I’m making a challenge Matt. You vs. Me at Unforgiven, because that’s exactly what you are, Unforgiven. No one will ever forgive you for putting your hands on Lita especially me. I’m going to make you pay Matt, I’m going to make you pay dearly! And I’m going to start making you pay tonight, because you’re going to hurt emotionally seeing me succeed. After tonight, when I win my triple threat match between Big Show and Kurt Angle, I’m a shoe in to be number one contender Matt! I’ll win the triple threat this week, and my performance will be so impressive I’ll probably get my title match next week, then I’ll win the title and kick your ass at Unforgiven! And you can Bank On That, Matt!”

Overall: 76

::Fade To Commercial::

Big Show vs. Kurt Angle vs. Edge

A great match between the three competitors, all wanting to prove that they can take the title from John Cena. Angle displayed his great technical capability against the two, suplexing the world. Big Show used his size and power advantage to fight off the teamed efforts of Edge and Angle. Edge nailed Angle with a dropkick that sent him right into the referee, which gave Edge the opportunity to floor Angle with the briefcase. Big Show went for the Choke Slam on Edge but Edge scored a low blow, followed by two consecutive briefcase shots to the head, but it was a Spear that finally took Show down. Edge covered Big Show but with no referee, no three count could be administered. The crowd went frantic as Matt Hardy bolted down the aisle and slid into the ring. Hardy grabbed Edge’s brieface and leveled Mr. Money In The Bank with it before leaving through the crowd. Big Show got up and delivered a double Show Stopper to both Angle and Edge for a double three count.

Winner: Big Show

Overall Rating: 88

Crowd Rating: 91

Match Rating: 83

::Fade To Commercial::

Number One Contender Announced!

Triple H’s music hits as The Game and Ric Flair make their way to the ring. Evolution climb into the ring and grab a microphone.

Triple H: “I reward you idiots here tonight, with the gracefulness of my precence and you spit at me and hiss at the mention of my name! Where the hell is your appreciation for everything I’ve done for you! You all cheer for a rookie like John Cena, when I’ve been busting my ass and working night after night here to be the best for years! Eric Bischoff must have forgotten how things work around here! I run this show! If Eric Bischoff doesn’t want to hand me a title shot I’ll just have to take one the old fashioned way! Through a brutal ass kicking! John Cena! Bring your punkass down to this ring right now!”

Triple H and Ric Flair disrobe from their dress shirts and make challenging hand motions towards the entrance way. John Cena’s music hits to a massive pop. Cena jumps the barricade and slides into the ring from behind. Cena taps Flair on the shoulder and dishes out a barrage of right hands to the Nature Boy. Soon Triple H see’s Cena and moves in for the attack but only recieves a beating. Cena clotheslines Triple H over the top rope, then nails Flair with the F-U. Cena rolls Flair out of the ring, and Triple H assists him to the back with Cena prancing around the ring, throwing up his title and the double horns. Out of nowhere Shawn Michaels jumps into the ring, steel chair in hand, and as John Cena turns around gets blasted over the head with it. HBK struts around the ring as the camera zooms in to see a bloodied champion laid out. Eric Bischoff’s music hits as the General Manager of RAW comes out on stage with a microphone in hand.

Eric: “Well John, I think I might have found an opponent worthy of kicking your ass and taking your title. Your number one contender is the only man that could defeat the Immortal Hulk Hogan, thus killing Hulkamania! And now bloodying you. At Unforgiven John, it’ll be you vs. The Heart Break Kid! Shawn Michaels!”

The crowd boo’s HBK and Bischoff who leave together, clearly making a pact to take Cena’s title away from him.

Overall: 82

Show Rating: 76

Smackdown Preview:

Booker T vs JBL

Rey Mysterio vs Juvi Guerrera

Sylvain Grenier and William Regal vs New Road Warriors - Tag Team Titles

Nunzio vs Johnny Nitro - Cruiserweight Title

Also in action, Batista, Randy Orton, Christian, Eddie Guerrero, and more!

[I Don't Mind]

Smackdown:

Date: September 8, 2005

All About Respect

Christian opens up Smackdown by coming down to the ring to his music, and taking a microphone from the ring crew.

Christian: "What happened last week was an insult to me and all my peeps, and we will not stand for it! In the middle of The Peep Show, me and my guest Eddie Guerrero were rudely interrupted by Smackdown’s so called Champion! He came down and just began tearing up my set! What happened to respect for your fellow man? Especially your superiors? Damnit it was a travesty of justice! And I want some vengeance! Batista! Tonight, it’s going to be The Animal vs. Captain Charisma! You are going to get the beating of a life time! 'Cause that's how I roll!"

Before Christian can continue, the music of Latino Heat plays, and Eddie Guerrero comes down to the ring. He swipes the microphone out of Christian’s hands, making him very upset.

Guerrero: “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Crunchitize this Captain. Batista may have torn up your stupid little playground, but he spat at me and my son Dominic! Nobody screws with Eddie Guerrero, or even Los Guerreros in general homes! So tonight, it’s going to be Latino Heat vs. The Animal Batista ese! And in the process, I think I’ll lie, cheat, and steal his little title ese vato!”

Christian: “Eddie, you’ve got it all wrong. No child-stealing, home-wrecking, maraca playing, Captain Charisma wannabe like you, is going to be taking my revenge away from me! You know why? ‘Cause I’m Captain Charisma, Bitch!”

The two go nose to nose, but their attention is quickly directed towards the entrance way, where Theodore Long’s music hits and comes out on stage.

Long: “Hey, hey, hey. Calm down there playas, this ain’t a riot scene, this is Smackdown. Now we’re going to have order here so here’s what we’re going to do. Tonight Batista will defends his WWE Title against either Christian, or Eddie Guerrero. Frankly, I’ve gotten word that he doesn’t care which of you it is! So as I see it, you two need to discuss which of you it’s going to be, and when you come up with a decision, meet Batista in the ring for the main event! If a decision can not be reached, then it looks like we’ll just have ourselves a triple threat! Now believe dat playas!”

Overall: 94

::Fade To Commercial::

Nunzio w/Big Vito vs. Johnny Nitro w/Melina, Mercury, and Hall - Cruiserweight Title

A spectacular match with crisp psychology between the two. The veteran Nunzio really brought out the best in the rookie Johnny Nitro. Like his match last week, MNM constantly cheated throughout the match but Big Vito played the intimidating enforcer, trying to keep things clean, with the exception of his cheap shots on Nitro. The end came when Nunzio on the apron hit a Sunset Flip on Nitro into the ring, but after a struggle for balance, Nitro dropped to his knees and hooked Nunzio’s leg for the pin. Nitro and Mercury linked hands and it looked as though Nitro was going to get the three, but Vito plowed through Mercury on the outside, and Nunzio completed his Sunset Flip. Nunzio pulled himself to his feet, then threw himself onto the middle rope for leverage for the three count. Nunzio and Vito made their way up the aisle with Cruiserweight Title in hand and in victory.

Winner: Nunzio

Overall Rating: 72

Crowd Rating: 61

Match Rating: 84

Italian Challenge

Nunzio and Big Vito are followed by a camera backstage as they make their way to their limo. As they walk they talk into the camera, clearly in a hurry.

Nunzio: “Mercury, Nitro, you boys think your so smart don’t you? Thinking you can steal my title away from me by cheating. Ha! That’s a laugh! You boys think you can out-cheat us? That’s how I won this title! Ain’t that right Big Vito?”

Vito: “Dat’s right Liddle Nunzio! You line up your opponents, and I’ll plow ‘em down for ya! We’re family! Dat’s how things work! We’re closer den bruddahs!”

Nunzio: “That’s right, so MNM, next week, you guys vs. us Italians! We’re taking it old school Italian beating! Tag team action, you and us! Bring your game faces boys! Because we’re not fooling around anymore!”

Nunzio and Vito climb into their limo and took off.

Overall: 59

::Fade To Commercial::

Sylvain Grenier and William Regal vs. New Road Warriors - Tag Team Titles

A fairly quick match with Regal and Heidenreich starting off. Regal showed an astonishing amount of strength, being able to suplex the big men. With Regal being able to fend for himself, he seemed reluctant at mid-match to tag out to Grenier. Grenier laid in some cheap shots to the New Road Warriors, but soon the powerhouse moves proved to be too much for Grenier. Grenier hit a Hotshot on Animal, then crawled over to Regal for the tag. Regal climbed down off the apron and made his way to the back. It didn’t take long before Grenier found himself on the receiving end of the Doomsday Device for the three count.

Winners: New Road Warriors

Overall Rating: 73

Crowd Rating: 71

Match Rating: 75

Tag Partner Wanted

William Regal is walking around backstage when he is confronted by Josh Matthews.

Josh Matthews: “William Regal, over the last few weeks you seemed to have turned your back on every tag team partner you’ve been handed. What’s your explanation for this?”

Regal: “Explanation? Listen to me sunshine, I don’t deserve anyone a bloody explanation! But if you’re just dying to know and your entire existence will cease to function if you don’t find out, fine! I’m on the look out for a partner that can match my greatness. That bloody little toe-rag Sylvan Grenier is a nothing, a nobody to me and couldn’t hold a candle to my abilities, even back in the day when I was a green rookie! I’m looking for someone like myself, who can dish it out so hard and fast that it doesn’t matter if he can take it in return! Post that in your little wanted ad’s sunshine!”

Overall: 86

Rey Mysterio vs. Juventud

A stiff, high flying clinic! Undoubtedly a match of the year contender, if not winner. The pace was so quick it seemed like any fall could be the three count. After hitting a 619 on Juvi, Rey went for the West Coast Pop, but Juvi ducked it and Rey landed on his feet behind Juvi. Juvi pinned Rey to the mat with the Backslide, but Rey rolled out at two and connected with a dropkick right to the face of Juvi. Rey looked around for a moment then rolled to the outside. Rey threw Tony Chimmel out of his chair and folded it up, before sliding into the ring with it. Rey leveled Juvi with the steel chair, getting himself disqualified. Psychosis and Super Crazy dashed down the aisle to save Juvi, as he was getting shot after shot laid in with the chair. Crazy took a chair shot right between the eyes, while Psychosis took a shot to the gut, then the spine. After a distressed Rey Mysterio single-handedly destroyed all three Mexicools, he dropped the chair and mournfully walked backstage.

Winner: Juventud via DQ

Overall Rating: 90

Crowd Rating: 80

Match Rating: 100

::Fade To Commercial::

Main Event Contender Decided

Batista is backstage in the hallways, talking to some of the staff, when out of nowhere he’s ambushed by “Legend Killer” Randy Orton. Orton lays in some right hands, some uppercuts and some throws into randomly assorted props backstage such as racks of pipes, boxes and tables full of food. Batista manages to take the upper hand though, when he throws a cup of hot coffee in Orton’s face, scalding him. Batista throws Orton into one wall, only to throw him into the opposite wall and back. After dragging Orton around for a while, Batista ended the fight when he threw Orton through a glass window. A horde of EMT’s quickly hit the scene to check on Orton. Batista left the scene, walking down one way of the hall way but the camera looks down the other way and Eddie Guerrero was leaning up against the wall watching the assault on Orton. Eddie knocks on a nearby dressing room door and Christian opens it.

Eddie: “Christian! Ese vato! I’m glad I caught you man. Listen, something’s come up man, it turns out little Dominic’s got a baseball game tomorrow and I don’t want to be going to his game all beat up and bruised and whatnot from a tough match like against a guy like Batista. You know me, I’m not good with pain like a tough guy like you are. Also, I promised Dominic I’d practice with him tonight, so I was thinking about catching the next flight out of here to go get on that.”

Christian: “Ah Eddie, I knew you were too chicken to face a big guy like Batista, but facing obstacles is what Captain Charisma does best! You go and play catch with your kid Guerrero. You just leave the tough-guy industry to superstars like me!”

Eddie: “Absolutely ese, absolutely. So congratulations on your title match tonight man, and… best of luck. You’re going to need it.”

Overall: 76

Booker T w/Sharmelle vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

A bar room would have been a more appropriate setting for this all-out brawl, than a wrestling ring. These two took it from the inside, to the outside, and back and forth. Booker had to dig a little deeper than usual to keep the big man Bradshaw down. The Booker Man even had to resort to dropping the Houston Hangover, but as he made the cover Orlando Jordan made his way down the aisle and pulled the referee out of the ring. Orlando argued with the referee as Booker got up and began to yell at Jordan to leave. As Booker turned back around though, he found himself down and out for the three after a Clothesline From Hell. The Cabinet began to dismantle Booker after the match until the music of Chris Benoit hit. Benoit sprinted down the ramp way and slid into the ring causing the for cowardly Cabinet to leave with great haste.

Winner: JBL

Overall Rating: 85

Crowd Rating: 87

Match Rating: 82

::Fade To Commercial::

Batista vs. Christian - WWE Heavyweight Title

Batista came out first to his music, but after his pyros he found himself jumped from behind by Christian. The two battled around the ring for a while before the bell rung, and Christian hit Batista with a shin breaker over the steel steps which set the direction of the match. Once back in the ring Christian spent all his time working over Batista’s knee. Luckily for Batista all his power came from his upper body and could still hit some big offensive moves on Christian. The end came when Christian had Batista reeling after some forearms to the face and went for a move off the ropes, only to run into a big Spinebuster by The Animal. Batista picked Christian up and still limping, nailed Captain Charisma with the Batista Bomb for the three count. Batista’s victory was short-lived though, as he was soon attacked from behind by Eddie Guerrero who ran down the aisle and nailed Batista in the back of the leg with a baseball bat. Eddie then hit Batista several times in the ribs with the bat followed by drawing some heat from the crowd. The Animal would not be put down so easy though and began pulling himself up using the ropes. He wasn’t up for long though as Guerrero broke the bat over his cranium, busting him wide open as the camera faded out on Guerrero’s smile over his body.

Winner: Batista

Overall Rating: 86

Crowd Rating: 89

Match Rating: 82

Show Rating: 78

Velocity Preview:

Big Vito vs. Johnny Nitro

Simon Dean and Steven Richards vs. Axl Rotten and Balls Mahoney

Orlando Jordan vs. Paul London - US Title

Edited August 20, 2005 by Inner D Monz

[I Don't Mind]

Velocity:

Date: September 10, 2005

Helpless And Hurt

MNM, Jillian Hall, and Melina are all backstage in the interview area with Funaki.

Funaki: “This is Funaki! Smackdown NUMBER ONE announcer! Tonight, I am here with, MNM. Johnny Nitro, tonight you face off against Big Vito, with your tag partner Joey Mercury, Jillian Hall, Melina, and Nunzio all banned from ringside. Things could get ugly for you, rather quickly…”

Jillian Hall snarls and snatches the microphone away from Funaki.

Hall: “Ugly!? Who are you calling ugly Funaki! Just because someone has a deformity, does not make them ugly! It’s true I have a blemish on my face but it doesn’t mean I’m not beautiful! Get the hell out of my sight! Tonight! Johnny Nitro does take on Big Vito one on one without any help, but he doesn’t need help! He’s perfectly capable of beating Big Vito, within an inch of his life without our help! And Theodore Long, you think your so smart by banning us all from ringside don’t you!? Well we’ll see who has the last laugh when Nitro is standing over Vito’s broken and bloodied body, looking like he was carved out of marble!”

Hall and Melina walk off leaving Nitro and Mercury shaking their heads and rolling their eyes.

Nitro: “Dude, again, she made our interview all about herself!”

Mercury: “Yeah, she’s supposed to be our “Fixer” but who’s reputation is she trying to fix? Our’s or her own?”

Nitro: “I’m telling you man, if I have to look at the revolting thing on her face again, I swear to you I’m going to throw up!”

The two shudder then walk off.

Overall: 78

::Fade To Commercial::

Big Vito vs. Johnny Nitro

Nitro couldn’t get in too much offense on the big man, and this was almost a squash match. Vito manhandled Nitro through the match, showing a lot of velocity. Nitro managed to turn the tables though briefly when after getting whipped into the corner, he caught Vito with a boot to the face. After Vito knocked Nitro silly with the Mafia Kick, he picked him back up and added insult to injury, nailing the Luca Brotzi, AKA the Double Arm DDT for the three count. After the match Mercury bolted down the aisle with a chair in hand. Mercury swung at Vito, but the big man ducked it, delivered a boot to the gut, and laid Mercury out with his own chair before leaving.

Winner: Big Vito

Overall Rating: 68

Crowd Rating: 62

Match Rating: 75

WWE Has No Balls!

Theodore Long is in his office when Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten come in.

Balls: “You wanted to see me Teddy?”

Long: “It’s Theodore, but to you it’s Mr. Long. Listen Mahoney, this isn’t ECW. You can’t just run around bashing people up with chairs, as much as you’d like to. Here on Smackdown, we have order and we have regulations.”

Balls and Axl sigh and bite their lips in deep concentration.

Axl: “We apologize, Mr. Long. Balls and I will try and keep things under control… but we’re not promising anything!”

Long: “Hold on a minute playa. That’s another thing. Again, this isn’t ECW so we can’t really say anything we want without the censor rats right on our back, ya feel me?”

Balls: “… No, not really. No. What are you trying to say?”

Long: “What I’m saying is we can’t call you Balls Mahoney. So what’s your real name dog?”

Balls: “My real name? This is my real name… Dog.”

Long: “Yeah? Well I’ve got a birth certificate here that says differently playa. I knew you wouldn’t go easy, you ECW types never do, so I went ahead and got a copy of your birth certificate. And it says here your first name is really… Brad! So Brad, you go ahead and go get ready for you match playa. Holla, holla, holla.”

Overall: 73

::Fade To Commercial::

Simon Dean and Steven Richards vs. Chair Swinging Freaks (Rotten and Mahoney)

A good solid tag team match, with both tag teams having worked together with their partners for years prior. Being WWE and not ECW, Rotten and Mahoney basically just showed off their toughness/defense rather then their offense by absorbing punishment like sponges. The two did manage to throw off some powerhouse moves, and some old school slams. The end came when Balls… er… em… Brad Mahoney hit an Implant Reverse DDT on Richards, while Axl attacked Dean as he tried to enter the ring. Mahoney got the three count and the Chair Swinging Freaks celebrated together. Dean and Richards soon got up though and wanted vengeance! Richards hit a low blow on Rotten, then shoved him out of the ring leaving Mahoney alone. Richards and Dean pounded away on Brad Mahoney, nailing him with a Double Electric Chair Faceplant. Dean and Richards stared at each other momentarily before leaving.

Winners: Chair Swinging Freaks

Overall Rating: 70

Crowd Rating: 58

Match Rating: 82

Chief Of Staff

Orlando Jordan is backstage with Josh Matthews.

Matthews: “Orlando Jordan, tonight you put your US Title on the line against former Cruiserweight Champion, Paul London. What’s going through your mind right now? Is there any intimidating, knowing what a great Cruiserweight Champion Paul London was, and how long he had the title and treasured it?”

Jordan: “Intimidated? First off Josh, I was trained, brought under the wing, or a Wrestling God! JBL has taught me everything I need to know, about keeping this title. I’ll retain it by hook or by crook until I’m dubbed the greatest US Champion of all time! Secondly, Paul London should stick to the Cruiserweight division! He’s barking up the wrong tree, thinking he can take my title! Paul London is going to be a piece of cake tonight, I guarantee it!”

Overall: 74

Orlando Jordan vs. Paul London - US Title

OJ couldn’t come through on his guarantee tonight, as London was no opening card jobber. London wowed the fans with his incredible acrobatics and top rope antics while Jordan kept running to the outside to catch his breath. Jordan caught London with some powerhouse moves that rattled his bones and made the crowd squirm. With London on fire and the crowd behind him, he went for a springboard Crossbody, but OJ ducked it. London quickly got back up but walked directly into the Blackout for the three count.

Winner: Orlando Jordan

Overall Rating: 74

Crowd Rating: 67

Match Rating: 81

Show Rating: 63

Heat Preview:

Johnny Parisi vs. Tajiri

Carlito vs. Danny Basham - IC Title

The Masterpieces vs. RAW’s Superheroes vs. The Heart Throbs - World Tag Team Titles

Also on the card: Rob Conway, Tyson Tomko, CM Punk, Val Venis and more!

[Twist]

I'm praying to God, that the cut backstage to Punk after the McMahon announcements means what I think it does. If it does, I'll love you forever.

Grest stuff so far, good capturing of the characters.

[I Don't Mind]

Heat:

Date: September 11, 2005

A new announcer sat beside Jonathan Coachman tonight. Making his debut as Heat announcer, Doc Marlee called all the matches with The Coach.

Johnny Parisi vs. Tajiri

A fast paced match between the two contestants with a technical styled cruiserweight fashion. Tajiri brought a more crowd pleasing cruiserweight style to the match, hitting moves like the Springboard Elbow and the Tarantula, while Parisi just used more simple Cruiserweight moves like Spinning Heel Kicks and Running Bulldogs. Tajiri cut Parisi down to size with a basement Dropkick to the knee, followed by a Buzzsaw Kick across the head for the three count.

Winner: Tajiri

Overall Rating: 68

Crowd Rating: 58

Match Rating: 78

::Fade To Commercial::

The Conman’s Opponent

Rob Conway comes out to his sultry music wearing his shades. He enters the ring and takes a microphone from the ring crew.

Conway: “The Conman is being left off the card tonight, which I think is a travesty of justice! Don’t the bookers here know who I am? I’m the Conman baby. And I’m going to make an open challenge here, because I know I can beat anyone in that locker room, or even anyone out here in the audience or at home! Why? Because I’m done following the rules here! I’m doing things my way! The Conway!”

The music of “Problem Solver” Tyson Tomko plays as the big man comes out on stage in his wrestling gear and a microphone.

Tomko: “Not who you were expecting am I? Everyone here knows me as the Problem Solver. Well I’m here to solve a big problem that’s been bugging me like crazy. There’s just too many bigmouths here in WWE. So how do we solve this problem? I’d say we solve this problem… by shutting them all up! One by one! And what bigger mouth in WWE is there, then Rob Conway? Tonight, Tomko vs. Conway! One on one! Let’s do it!”

Overall: 58

Rob Conway vs. Tyson Tomko

Tomko seemed surprisingly acceptable for a man of his size tonight, as the crowd got behind all his powerhouse moves. Conway played the cowardly always-cheating heel on this one. Tomko would drop Conway chest first onto the top rope via Guerrilla Press, only for Conway to counter a few seconds later by hanging Tomko out. The two battled back and forth until Tomko whipped Conway chest-first into the corner so hard, he bounced out into the Problem Solved (Roll Of The Dice). Tomko covered Conway for the three count.

Winner: Tyson Tomko

Overall Rating: 68

Crowd Rating: 65

Match Rating: 71

::Fade To Commercial::

SXE Challenge For RAW

Val Venis is backstage in the locker room with two lovely ladies in his arms.

Venis: “So ladies, have you been a fan of mine long?”

Lady 1: “Oh yes Val, ever since we saw you in one of your movies.”

Lady 2: “Yeah, god it just made us so hot watching you, and in the ring too! We’re so glad we could get this opportunity to meet you.”

Venis: “Well you know something ladies? The Big Valboski is all about opportunities. So I’m thinking a good opportunity for you two tonight would be a little ménage toi”

The two girls giggle but the immoral proposition was soon broken up by CM Punk and Vicki Adams. Adams threw each girl face first into the concrete wall and laid in a few stomps while Punk tackled Venis into his dresser, then pounded away at him with right hands. Adams took out a can of spray paint and began spraying something all over the walls. Punk picked up a nearby garbage can and crashed it into Venis’ body. Punk laid in a few stiff kicks to the ribs of Val Venis before the camera zoomed out.

Punk: “I will not work in a company full of sin and moral corruption! Your promiscuous sexual antics sicken me Val! One of us has got to go! One way or the other! And it’s not going to be me! See you Monday Val.”

As Punk and Vicki Adams leave, we see spray painted on the wall “Venis vs. Punk September 12”

Overall: 70

IC Title Match!

Carlito comes down to the ring to his music and takes a microphone from the ring crew.

Carlito: “Well, well, well, what a bunch of uncool, fat, lazy, losers I’m surrounded by. None of you could ever even hope to be as cool as Carlito! It makes me sick. I’m starting to think that it’s all of America that’s uncool. Maybe Carlito’s the only one in the US that has any remote coolness!”

Before Carlito can continue, some patriotic music hits as Danny Basham comes out on stage.

Basham: “Do my ears deceive me? Did you just call America uncool? Let me point something out to you, my name is Danny Basham, and I’m an American citizen! I’m here to stand up for what America used to stand for! Freedom! And I’m going to use my freedom of speech right now to point out… that you Carlito are a [~bleep!~]. Tonight, I challenge you to put your Intercontinental Title on the line against me! Right here! Right now! USA! ALL THE WAY!”

Carlito motions for Basham to bring it and Basham runs down the aisle into the ring to start the match.

Overall: 76

Carlito vs. Danny Basham - Intercontinental Title

A great match between the two that brought out a superb old school feel. The two brought out everything from their technical arsenal, brawling arsenal, and even some attempts at high flying maneuvers, such as a flying Axe Handle off the top rope by Danny Basham. Basham got a lot of USA chants to fire him up, and it worked as he began whipping out a series of Hip-Tosses, Back Body Drops, and Clotheslines. Unfortunately for Basham, tonight was not his night and after hitting the Cool-Breaker on Danny Basham, Rene Dupree ran down the aisle to hold Basham’s feet down unknown to the referee, making it impossible to kick out, and soon Carlito was declared the winner. Carlito ran off with his IC Title, leaving Rene Dupree celebrating his screw job in the ring. Danny Basham, extremely pissed off got up and tackled Dupree, rolling around the ring and pounding away at him until a flock of zebras could prance down the aisle and separate the two.

Winner: Carlito

Overall Rating: 79

Crowd Rating: 74

Match Rating: 84

::Fade To Commercial::

A Super Interview!

Stacy Keibler, The Hurricane and Rosey were all backstage in the interview area with Todd Grisham.

Grisham: “Stacy, tonight The Hurricane and Rosey take on both The Masterpieces, and The Heart Throbs in a triple threat tag team match for The Hurricane and Rosey’s, World Tag Team Titles. What are your thoughts?”

Super Stacy: “Holy improper name callings, citizen Todd! I’m no longer Stacy Keibler! Stacy Keibler is a girl who prances around in her skimpies for the amusement of others! I am so much better then her! I am super Stacy! And I am here to save the day for my Tag Team Champions! Tonight, my boys take on both The Masterpieces and The Heart Throbs, but we’re more than confident in our ability to win! Hurricane! Can you believe there are actually people out there who think you can’t win tonight!?”

Hurricane: “Simply put Super Stacy, WASSUP WIT DAT!?”

Hurricane gets a loud, cheap pop as he yells his catch phrase and crosses his arms.

Overall: 82

Masterpieces vs. The Heart Throbs vs. RAW's Super Heroes - World Tag Team Titles

A great triple threat tag match between the three teams. The Masterpieces dominated every time they were tagged in. Neither of RAW’s Superheroes or The Heart Throbs could single handedly take down either of the Masterpieces, and had to rely on double teams to inflict damage on them. Masters got the Master Lock locked in on Rosey at one point but The Hurricane broke it up with a Missile Dropkick to the back. The Heart Throbs crushed Masters at the end with the Party Down, but both were then destroyed at the hands of Masters’ tag partner Snitsky, taking Romeo down with a Big Boot and the other down with a Pump Handled Slam. However after dominating, Snitsky turned around into a Side Slam position by Rosey and then got dropped with the Eye Of The Hurricane by The Hurricane. RAW’s Superheroes pig-piled on Snitsky for the three count.

Winners: RAW’s Superheroes

Overall Rating: 75

Crowd Rating: 67

Match Rating: 84

Show Rating: 70

RAW Preview:

Shelton Benjamin vs. Kurt Angle - Teacher vs Student!

Big Show vs. Chris Jericho

Matt Hardy vs. Rob Conway

Danny Basham vs. Rene Dupree

Eugene vs. Carlito - Non-Title Match

CM Punk vs. Val Venis

All this and much, much more!

[I Don't Mind]

RAW:

Date: September 12, 2005

CM Punk w/Vicki Adams vs. Val Venis

A great match between the two contestants. Venis had a fire lit under him tonight due to Punk’s attack on him at heat. Venis really wanted to teach this new comer a lesson, but it wouldn’t be so easy to take down CM Punk. Punk had his manager/girlfriend Vicki Adams cheering him on through the whole match, and got in a cheap shot on Venis every so often. In a WrestleMania XIII classic moment, with Venis having a Sleeper locked in tight on Punk, Punk pushed himself off the turnbuckles into a pin, but it was only for a two count. Not too long after, Venis whipped Punk off the ropes and went for a Back Body Drop but Punk stopped short and nailed Venis with a faceplant into the mat. Punk locked on the Devil Lock for the submission victory.

Winner: CM Punk

Overall Rating: 77

Crowd Rating: 71

Match Rating: 83

SXE Strikes Again!

Before leaving the ring, Vicki Adams climbs into the ring with Punk, and hands him a microphone.

Punk: September 18, 6 days from now! Unforgiven! Culture and society as a whole will once again sicken me and Vicki! Your beloved hero, Stone Cold Steve Austin will be at Unforgiven! To do what!? Attack people, wave middle fingers, and… drink the night away! Those are his only talents! He isn’t a wrestler! He’s a convict! He sure as hell isn’t any role model for your kids! Not like me! Any yahoo can get drunk, flick people off then kick their ass! Steve Austin, is no CM Punk! Steve Austin is no wrestler. I, am, a, wrestler. And I’m the best there is today, tomorrow, yesterday and anywhere in between, before or after! Austin! Unforgiven! I’ll meet you on the Highlight Reel! Bring your middle fingers, bring your beer, I don’t give a damn. You can bet your sorry ass I’m going to see you eye to eye, and as Vince McMahon already stated… it’s going to be highly, explosive! And that’s the bottom line… because the Straight Edge says so!”

Overall: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

Danny Basham vs. Rene Dupree

In the second great match of the night, the two men most proud of their ethnicity battle it out. Basham got a little dirty in this match, intensified by his patriotism. Basham picked Dupree up for a Back Drop, but instead of falling backwards, dropped Dupree onto the ropes, sending them right between his legs. Basham then added insult to injury by climbing up to the second rope and knocking Dupree off the ropes to the outside with a right hand. The crowd was right behind Basham in this one all the way, and Dupree got some serious heat when he hit the French Tickler. Unfortunately the crowd being behind you isn’t always enough to give you the big W. After exposing the second turnbuckle pad earlier in the match, the end came when Dupree delivered a drop toe hold onto the exposed steel turnbuckle for the three count. Basham’s lip was clearly busted open from the drop onto the steel turnbuckle, but Dupree celebrated his win to a lot of animosity from the audience.

Winner: Rene Dupree

Ovreall Rating: 77

Crowd Rating: 73

Match Rating: 82

Age Of Punk… Rock Not CM

Ashley Massaro is backstage talking to Christy Hemme when Lita comes walking by holding onto the arm of her boyfriend Edge. Lita spots Ashley in her converse, backwards baseball hat, fishnet stockings and sleeveless belly-shirt. Lita scoffs at Ashley and sends Edge away, before deciding to make her presence known.

Lita: “Hey I didn’t know Avril Lavigne was in town. Can I have your autograph Avril? Oh, oops, I’m sorry Ashley. I thought you were a different punk-rock-wannabe.”

Christy takes Ashley by the arm and tries to pull her away and console her but Ashley will hear none of it.

Ashley: “Wannabe? If you ask me, you’re a Courtney Love wannabe! You find your Kurt Cobain in Matt Hardy, then you stab him in the back! Just like Courtney had Cobain killed, you got Matt fired after you cheated on him.”

Lita: “Oh god, everyone’s a conspiracy expert now I take it. Don’t give me that B.S. Cobain killed himself! He bit the bullet when he sucked the shotgun! You hear one little morsel of a story revolving Punk Rock, and you store it away in your head for over a decade, and you think you know what Punk Rock is about? You think you know anything about Punk Rock!?”

Ashley: “Hey, I admit I’m the new kid on the block here on RAW, but last time I checked when people had a dispute they settled it in the ring! So how about you vs. me at Unforgiven!”

Lita: “You’re on!”

Lita then stomps off leaving Christy concerned for Ashley.

Christy: “Hey! Whoa! Ashley! What are you thinking! You’re not a wrestler! You don’t know how to wrestle! And Lita, is a lying, dirty, cheating, man-stealing, whore! She’ll screw you over faster then she screwed Edge!”

Ashley: “You’re right. I’m an idiot for challenging her. So Christy, I think in the interest of fairness… you should be the referee!”

Christy’s mouth drops as Ashley merrily skips off.

Overall: 73

::Fade To Commercial::

Matt Hardy vs. Rob Conway

Hardy and Conway both brought it to the table tonight, but as everyone expected this to be a slower-paced technical styled match, a vicious Matt Hardy turned it into a street-fight-like brawl! Conway, infuriated that Hardy knocked his shades off of him in the opening of the match brought out his intensity, and Hardy, pissed about his feud with Edge brought out his intensity. Hardy slammed Conway down with the Side Effect, then climbed to the second rope and nailed the Legdrop. Hardy then covered Conway but released the pin at two. Hardy picked Conway’s limp body up and screamed “This Is For You Edge! Unforgiven!” and planted Conway with the Twist Of Fate for the three count. As Hardy celebrated his victory to an ovation from his MF’ers, Edge ran down the ramp way and slid into the ring. The two got into a wild brawl that neither could take control of. They battled back and forth with only right hands to the temple and hands full of each other’s hair. Finally a swarm of referee’s and officials ran down and held the two apart.

Winner: Matt Hardy

Overall Rating: 73

Crowd Rating: 69

Match Rating: 78

Unforgiven Match Never Going To Happen!

As Edge is held apart from Hardy on one side of the ring, and Hardy is likewise on the other side, Eric Bischoff’s music hits as he comes out on stage.

Bischoff: “Enough! Enough the both of you! Stop it! It’s plain to see that you two want to do each other more harm then any normal wrestling match, which puts each of your lives at risk! I won’t stop you two from tearing each other limb from limb at the expense of yourselves and my ratings, but I can’t allow it to happen! The WWE can not, and will not allow it to happen! That’s why… your match at Unforgiven is unsanctioned! No hold’s barred rules! Do whatever you’d like to each other! WWE, RAW, and personally myself, don’t give a damn anymore!”

Overall: 78

::Fade To Commercial::

Eugene Dinsmore vs. Carlito - Non-Title Match

This match would have been equally as great, if not better with some sort of comical three-stooges music playing. Eugene did everything and anything to humiliate Carlito. Carlito had everything done to him from being given a wedgie, being spun around till he was dizzy, being rode like a horse, and even pretended to be urinated on in a Junk-Yard-Dog like fashioned “Attack” from Eugene. The more Eugene humiliated Carlito, the more aggravated he got. Carlito at the end got so aggravated that he just plain charged at Eugene for a tackle, but Eugene so quick and clever dodged it and Carlito went right into the ring post. Eugene dropped Carlito for the three count after a Stone Cold Stunner. Carlito got up after the pinfall kicked Eugene right between the legs. Carlito choked Eugene out with a boot across the throat in the corner, and before leaving spit apple in Eugene’s face.

Winner: Eugene

Overall Rating: 78

Crowd Rating: 74

Match Rating: 82

Game On!… Again!

Ric Flair and Triple H burst into Eric Bischoff’s office, unforeseen by Bischoff.

Flair: “Eric man, what are you thinking? You’re giving Eugene, Carlito, Matt Hardy, Edge and all those other losers spots on the Unforgiven card, your giving them all opportunities to shine, but your not giving The Game, Triple H an opportunity!? This man, is a ten time World Champion! He single-handedly put RAW on the map! We would be out of business if it weren’t for The Game!”

Triple H: “Bischoff, I’m a reasonable, patient man. But my patience will only last so long. I want what is mine, and you are going to give it to me. As if it isn’t bad enough Shawn Michaels is getting MY title shot, I’m not even being put in matches on RAW to show you that I can destroy anyone at any time and take my title back! I can take your ratings Eric, and bring them to a place they’ve never been before! Give me my opportunity!”

Eric: “… Alright! Alright! You’ve got your match! At Unforgiven, you Triple H will face… a mystery opponent! Triple H vs. a wrestler of my choosing, for the number one contendership. It could be Chris Jericho, it could be Kurt Angle, it could be even… Steve Austin! You won’t know, but since you’re so confident in yourself, I guess it just won’t matter will it Hunter? Alright you’ve got your match, now get the hell out of my office.”

Triple H: Laughing, “Eric, you can play all the little mind games you want, but you’re not going to psych me out. I, Am, The Game! I am a ten time Heavyweight Champion! And I will be again… because I am… that, Damn, Good!”

Overall: 91

Big Show vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho played the cowardly, underdog-heel on this one, constantly running away from Big Show and using cheap tactics like being chased into the ring then attacking Show when he tries to follow to wear him down. Jericho using his keen intellect dove off the top rope for a missile dropkick to try and knock the big man down, but Show caught Y2J’s legs and slingshotted him into the corner, where he sandwiched the referee. As Jericho staggered back over to Big Show, he was caught by the neck. Before he could be lifted up though, Jericho kicked Show between the legs. Y2J exited the ring and grabbed a steel chair. Before Jericho could use it when he reentered the ring though, Stone Cold Steve Austin bolted down the aisle, entering the ring and stealing the chair from him. Austin flattened Jericho with the chair and played up the crowd. Big Show turned around into a Stone Cold Stunner before Austin left. The Big Show fell backwards onto the fallen Jericho for a pin. The referee reawoken and counted the three, declaring Big Show the winner.

Winner: Big Show

Overall Rating: 87

Crowd Rating: 90

Match Rating: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

Up The Ante At Unforgiven

Shawn Michaels and Eric Bischoff are seen backstage in Bischoff’s office going over HBK’s strategy for Sunday when John Cena barges in.

Cena: “Take notice because The Champ is here!”

Bischoff: “God, I’ve got to get a lock on that door”

Cena: “Eric Bischoff, Shawn Michaels. What an honor it is to be in both of your presences at the same time. It’s like being at a retirement home, and I’m calling out the Bingo numbers.”

Bischoff: “What do you want Cena? To say goodbye to your WWE Heavyweight Title now and just forfeit the your match at Unforgiven?”

Cena: “Actually Eric, quite the opposite. I wanna put more on the line then just my title! I know how bad you want this title off of my Bischoff. And I know how much confidence you have in Shawn Michaels. So I’m proposing we up the ante. Lets do it for real! Because Real... recognizes Real! You want some!? Come get some! Unforgiven, it’s going to be The New Franchise, John Cena walking out with the Chain Gang, WWE Title around my waist! Not Shawn Michaels dancing out like a Chippendale’s dancer at a gentlemen’s club… if you catch my drift, surrounded by his Kliq of ILGA.”

Bischoff: “Up the ante? I like the way you think Cena, what did you have in mind. I don’t really much care what you suggest because I know you’re just going to lose anyways, so lay it on me MC Cena.”

HBK: “Stop Eric! It’s Cena time! Don’t think too hard now kid, I wouldn’t want you to pull anything”

Cena: “Shawn, your jokes are about as old and gray as Bischoff’s hair. What I’m proposing is job vs. job. I’m willing to put my job up on the line, how about that!”

HBK: “Are you serious? He can’t be serious. Is he serious? You want me to put my career on the line against yours?”

Cena: “Ha, Shawn, just like I expected. You need some spectacles old man, because it’s way to clear that you just can’t see me! I don’t want to end your career Shawn. Sure, you busted me over the head with a chair last week like a little sissy girl who attacks from behind, but you’re a legend. You’re an icon! You’re the Heart Break Kid! No, I want your job on the line Bischoff! I’m sick and tired of you pushing me around as GM! And I know you’re too gutless to face me for your job, so lets put your job in the hands of HBK here… since you have so much confidence in him that is.”

After a moment of hesitance for Bischoff he responds.

Bischoff: “Alright. You’re on! John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels at Unforgiven! If John Cena wins, then I’ll hand over my position as GM, hell! I’ll let you choose who to replace me with. I don’t give a damn, because I know that if, no! When! When, Shawn Michaels beats you… I’ll never have to look at this toy you call a title, or your ugly face, ever again!”

Bischoff and HBK stare Cena down but Cena doesn’t back down an inch as the camera fades out.

Overall: 80

Kurt Angle vs. Shelton Benjamin - Teacher vs. Student Match

The question tonight was bound to finally be answered! Kurt Angle undoubtedly taught Shelton Benjamin everything Shelton knows, but did Angle teach Shelton everything that he knows!? The two put on a wrestling clinic that lasted a whole twenty minutes, but the crowd couldn’t keep their eyes off. Everything from mat wrestling, to Angle’s top rope Moonsault and Shelton’s Springboard Bulldog and Planchas were pulled out. These two arrogant athletes were playing a personal game of “Can You Top This!?”. Trying to show one another up throughout the match left the crowd drooling and craving more. Benjamin looked as though he was just about to get the upset victory when he hit the Dragon Whip that knocked Angle out of the ring. As Shelton fired up the crowd the lights went out, similar to last week. After a long period of time of darkness, the lights came back on where the audience and referee saw Shelton Benjamin down and bloodied in the middle of the ring with Angle on his hands and knees beside him, and chair by Angle’s hands. The referee immediately disqualified Angle which angered him. The Olympic Gold Medallist nailed the referee with the Angle Slam and yelled in his face as the show ended.

Winner: Shelton Benjamin via DQ

Overall Rating: 92

Crowd Rating: 88

Match Rating: 96

Show Rating: 81

Smackdown Preview:

Rey Mysterio on The Peep Show!

The Italian Connection (Vito and Nunzio) vs. MNM

William Regal and A Partner Of His Choosing vs. The New Road Warriors - Tag Team Titles

An Interview with Randy Orton via Satellite

Chris Benoit and Booker T team up against Steven Richards and Simon Dean

Also on the card, Batista, Eddie Guerrero, The Mexicools, Paul London, The Undertaker, Teddy Long and more!

[Twist]

Very good again, so far I think you've dealt with Punk greatly, even if his push has been quite big considering. Kind of hoping HBK wins. RAW without Bischoff would be weird and plus, im not a fan of Cena.

[I Don't Mind]

Smackdown:

Date: September 15, 2005

The Italian Connection vs. MNM w/Jillian Hall and Melina

An old school feel tag team match, which wasn’t bad by any means. Lots of double teams by each team and back and forth action. Mostly cruiserweight action between the two teams, except when Vito came in to dominate. Mercury and Nitro had to use cheap tactics to wear down the big man as usual, but it wasn’t very effective as Vito knew a thing or two about cheating. The end came when all four competitors were battling it out in the ring, with Vito throwing MNM around. Jillian Hall jumped up on the apron to try and distract the referee so MNM could cheat to get the upper hand, but Vito was in control. Vito whipped Mercury off the ropes, but Mercury reversed. Vito almost collided with Hall on the apron but stopped just in time. Hall and Vito stared at one another for a few moments as MNM double Clotheslined Nunzio out of the ring. Vito turned back around into the Snapshot for the three count.

Winners: MNM

Overall Rating: 71

Crowd Rating: 61

Match Rating: 82

::Fade To Commercial::

Darn Gringos!

The Mexicools drove down the aisle in their supped up lawn mower. They climbed into the ring as Juvi grabbed the microphone.

Juvi: “Listen up Gringos! There is one lousy punk backstage who keeps getting in our way! We don’t like when people get in our way! We are not the typical, lazy, pushover Mexicans! We are Mexicools! And tonight, Psychosis is going to teach one bad little Gringo a lesson!”

Just as Juvi makes that statement, a cameraman drops his camera and slides into the ring. The cameraman fires off several right forearms on Super Crazy, backing him into a corner. Juvi tries to attack the camera man from behind but the camera man dodges it and Juvi runs right into Super Crazy. The cameraman charges at Psychosis and knocks him down with a back elbow. Juvi charges once more but gets floored by a Dropsault! The cameraman’s hat and phony mustache falls off thus revealing Paul London! London catches Super Crazy with a Spinning Heel Kick as he runs over. Juvi and Crazy roll out of the ring leaving Psychosis all alone for his match.

Overall: 71

Paul London vs. Psychosis

A spectacular cruiserweight match generated from the immense tension between The Mexicools and Paul London. London fought off both Super Crazy and Juvi, being wise of their games, but after just one cheap shot on London by Juvi, London took out both of them with a Plancha, and the referee kicked The Mexicools to the back. Psychosis slowed the match down with a lot of rest holds and submissions, but London kept the crowd entertained with some acrobatics. With London in clear control, he climbed up to the top rope for the 450 Splash, but Psychosis gave the referee a kick to the back of the leg, causing him to fall down and hit his head on the ropes, knocking him down holding his head and London onto the turnbuckle. London couldn’t keep his balance after being crotched on the turnbuckle and fell forward onto the mat as Psychosis rolled out. Psychosis took the ring bell and as London leaned out of the ring over the bottom rope, Psychosis clocked him with it. Psychosis dropped the ring bell and climbed back in the ring, covering London for the three count.

Winner: Psychosis

Overall Rating: 79

Crowd Rating: 66

Match Rating: 93

Main Event Announced!

Theodore Long is backstage in his office when Eddie Guerrero comes dancing in, happy as a clam over last week’s assault on Batista.

Eddie: “Senor Long, Whatsup Ese Vato!? Odele homes.”

Long: “Eddie, don’t come in here prancing around like you just solved world hunger. This is serious. What you did last week to Batista was disgusting and most of all disrespectful. I have no choice as the general manager but to put you in a match tonight to teach you some respect. And I think your opponent will be a man who is all about respect, in The Undertaker!”

Eddie: “The Undertaker!? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Teddy, man, calm down. Take a breath ese. Think about what you’re doing here. You can’t book me in a match tonight ese! Batista’s probably stomping around the hallways right now looking for me! You know he’s going to get involved in my match tonight homes!”

Long: “Usually Eddie, I would agree with you and I would ban Batista from ringside to retain order here on Smackdown…”

Eddie: “That’s the spirit homes, there you go.”

Long: “But not tonight! Tonight, to keep Batista and you apart, you will face The Undertaker in a fifteen foot high steel cage match!”

The camera zooms in on Eddie’s face of fear and astonishment.

Overall: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

Booker T and Chris Benoit vs. Simon Dean and Steven Richards

A spectacular tag team match between the four contestants. Richards and Dean came out in matching work-out clothes, and Richards had his Right To Censor haircut. Booker and Benoit really blended as a team, knowing each other’s ins and outs from their Best Of 7 Series in WCW, while Dean and Richards knew one another’s styles from their ECW Tagging days in the BWO. This was a great technical styled match with great psychology. Steven Richards and Simon Dean took turns throwing their opponents outside so the other one could pound away at them illegally. Booker got the hot tag and opened up with right hands and Houston Side Kicks on both his opponents. Benoit got up as Dean went to attack Booker from behind, but Benoit intercepted and locked him in the Crippler Crossface. Booker nailed Richards with the Scissors Kick for the three count. After the match as Booker and Benoit celebrated, John Bradshaw Layfield ran down the aisle and slid into the ring with a lead pipe in hand. JBL drove the pipe into the ribs of Booker, followed by a shot to his spine. JBL then leveled Benoit with a shot to the head with the pipe busting him open. JBL laid in some boots to the fallen Benoit before nailing him with the pipe a few more times.

Winners: Booker T and Chris Benoit

Overall Rating: 84

Crowd Rating: 81

Match Rating: 88

Wrestling God Smites Benoit!

Before JBL leaves, he drops his pipe and picks up a microphone.

JBL: “Chris Benoit! You meddled in my business for the last time! You tried to play the hero last week by saving your little buddy Booker T, but how does it feel to be a hero now!? You’re paying the price of being a hero Benoit! Don’t you see? It doesn’t matter what you do for these people, it doesn’t matter how much they love you, it’s all shallow B.S. emotions! None of it is real! What is real is right now, how you lay in a puddle of your own blood, bowing at the feet of a wrestling, GOD! I’m saying right now is that Benoit is nothing compared to John Bradshaw Layfield! He is an insect! A maggot! A nothing! A nobody! And I will continue to beat his ass week in and week out until he gives up this sad little parade of ridicule of our sport! Benoit will never again try and play the hero, I‘ll make sure of it! And what I say, I do, and what I do, I do very, very well. So mark this day on your calendars, the day Chris Benoit’s career was flushed down the toilet by J-B-L!”

Overall: 82

::Fade To Commercial::

Regal’s Partner Search:

Orlando Jordan is seen getting coffee at a concession table when William Regal approaches him.

Regal: “Orlando Jordan, US Champion. If anyone deserves to hold that title its you sunshine. What do you say Orlando, tonight we put the best representation of the US and the best representation of mother England, to take those Tag Team Titles! What do you say to that sunshine?”

Orlando: “Ah, I don’t know Regal. Honestly, you’re really not all that trustable.”

Regal: “I understand Orlando. I understand perfectly fine. It’s ok to be afraid of The New Road Warriors, it is. I understand.”

Orlando: “Afraid!? Hold on a second there William, who do you think you’re talking to? I’m Orlando Jordan! I was trained by John Bradshaw Layfield! How many people in this industry were taken under the wing of a wrestling god!? Mr. Layfield’s been like a big brother for me, always looking out for me and whatnot. I owe him the world.”

Regal: “Then wouldn’t you like to impress him by showing him two WWE titles? Think about it, Orlando Jordan - US Champion, and Tag Team Champion!”

Orlando: “Hmm… you’re right. That does have a nice ring to it. Alright Regal, you’re on!”

Overall: 71

Orlando Jordan and William Regal vs. New Road Warriors

Jordan and Regal got shoved around and overpowered by the New Road Warriors like the last few weeks. Jordan did prove to be an adequate tag team partner for Regal tonight, as he didn’t walk out on him this time. However The New Road Warriors had just so much more chemistry then Jordan and Regal and thus it wasn’t long before Jordan was down and out via the Doomsday Device for the three count. After the Road Warriors celebrated and left with their tag team titles William Regal and Orlando Jordan had an intense staredown. Jordan shoved Regal down and started mouthing off to him, looking irate! Suddenly a large man dressed in only slacks ran out from the back and into the ring. The man known as Paul Mitchell floated behind Jordan as he went for a punch, and struck Jordan with a Release German Suplex. After trying to fire up the crowd, Mitchell picked Jordan back up and hit him with a Rolling Samoan Drop, followed by a standing Moonsault! This got the crowd to stand on their feet due to Mitchell’s size. Mitchell picked Jordan up once more and placed him on the top rope. Mitchell climbed up with him and hooked his arm like a Rock Bottom. Mitchell did a backflip, bringing Jordan along with him and nailed the C-4!! The crowd went nuts as did Regal! Regal had found his tag team partner and raised his hand in victory.

Winner: New Road Warriors

Overall Rating: 77

Crowd Rating: 73

Match Rating: 81

::Fade To Commercial::

No Glass Bones

Randy Orton comes on the screen from his home via Satellite. Orton is covered in cuts and bandages and looks very intense.

Orton: “Batista, last week you tried to end my career. You threw me through a glass window! That glass could have been in my eyes, my head, it could have very well killed me. Luckily though, I was rushed off to the hospital and I’m told I’ll be back as soon as, oh say, next week! You see Batista, I am Randy Orton! Nothing can stop Randy Orton! You know why!? Because I’m the future of this business! Not you! Me! I’m a third generation superstar, and nothing can stop me Batista, not even you. I’ll be back Batista, you’ll see. I’ll be back and I’ll be coming for you. And when I find you Batista, I’ve got three letters that will be very important to you. R…K…O!”

Overall: 88

Mysterio On The Peep Show!

As the camera comes off of the Titan-Tron and back to the ring, Christian is standing in the middle of his set for The Peep Show.

Christian: “Where’s my peeps tonight!?”

Christian gets a large ovation despite being a heel.

Christian: “Tonight I’m here to ask the questions no one seems to want to ask. I’m not afraid to ask because I’m not afraid to hear the answers! I’m Captain Charisma Bitch! And that’s how I roll! So for all my peeps out there tonight, let me introduce tonight’s guest. Rey Mysterio!”

Rey Mysterio’s music hits followed by his sparks shooting up from the stage but no Mysterio. Mysterio then walks through the curtains and down the aisle before getting into the ring. Rey takes a microphone from the ring crew before sitting down on the plastic inflatable couch.

Rey: “Christian.”

Christian: “Yes, I am. Rey let’s get right down to brass bones here. Let’s drop all the small talk and all the little stupid sissy mind games. What’s been going on with you man? You’ve been no-showing for your matches, sitting in dark rooms by yourself, getting yourself purposely disqualified! And you don’t even have a title, therefore you don’t even really have an excuse. So what’s been going on with you?”

Rey: “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me is I lost the only title to me that really mattered. That title was… Dad. With Dominic out of my life not a lot makes sense to me anymore. I don’t really have the ambition to do anything. All I feel is fury all the time and it hurts Christian! It hurts bad! Frankly I don’t have the ambition to wrestle all that much anymore! I don’t have the ambition to go out every night and entertain these fans! The only reason I came out last week, and maybe the following weeks for my matches is to vent some of my aggression on my opponent! You see, I no longer come out to wrestle, or entertain… I come out to hurt people! Because when I see pain in someone else’s eyes, then for one brief moment my hurt goes away!”

Christian: “Rey, this is a business where we entertain the fans. That’s what this business is all about. That’s why Captain Charisma is so great! Because that’s what he does best, is entertain the fans! So I’ve only got one more question for you Rey… are you thinking about retiring from wrestling?”

After a long hesitation, of Rey walking around the ring holding his chin in deep concentration, Rey finally got face to face with Christian and after a staredown answered.

Rey: “Actually Christian I was considering it. But something recently dawned on me. If I did retire, and I did unleash some of the pain I feel everyday… onto just random people instead of people that are meant to take it for a living, then I’d be arrested, and what fun is that? Or basically Christian I think I can summarize this, I’m not going to retire for a long time, simply so I can still do this!”

Rey slammed the microphone into the face of Christian, dropping him to the ground. Rey mounted Christian and pounded away at him with the microphone, then just with his fists. Rey dismounted off of Christian and exited the ring where he got a steel chair from Tony Chimmel. Rey reentered the ring and nailed Christian in the face with it as he was on his heels staring up bloodied. Rey nailed Christian repeatedly in the spine, legs, and arms with the chair, more vicious then we’ve ever seen Rey. Finally Rey dropped his chair and got down on his belly where he stared into Christian’s bloody face, and evilly smiled.

Overall: 82

::Fade To Commercial::

The Undertaker vs. Eddie Guerrero - Cage Match

Undertaker did his job tonight, dismantling Eddie to show him some respect. Taker threw Guerrero into all four cage walls followed by a Choke Slam. Eddie managed to nail some cheap shots on Undertaker, such as low blows and brought out some ariel assaults by diving off the side of the cage as he was climbing up with a Sky Twister Press. Near the end Undertaker nailed a second Choke Slam and began crawling for the door. Eddie got to his feet and baseball slided The Undertaker in the butt, sending him face first into the door, and the door swinging into the referee, knocking him out. Taker did manage to escape the cage but the referee never saw it, so after some fighting around the ring Eddie managed to get The Undertaker back into the ring. The match lasted about another five minutes before Eddie locks the Lasso From El Passo in on The Undertaker. The Undertaker powers out of it though using just his leg strength, but sent Eddie flying out the door for the win. Eddie celebrated but it wasn’t long before as Eddie was backing up up the ramp way, Batista showed up behind him. Batista brutally beat on Eddie before throwing him back into the ring. Batista bounced Eddie around the cage a while and grated his face like cheese on it, before nailing the Batista Bomb and standing proud over his enemy.

Winner: Eddie Guerrero

Overall rating: 89

Crowd Rating: 96

Match Rating: 75

Show Rating: 78

Velocity Preview:

Scotty 2 Hotty and Funaki vs. Psychosis and Super Crazy

MNM vs. Chair Swinging Freaks

Orlando Jordan Makes An Open Challange For His US Title

Unforgiven Preview:

Shawn Michaels vs John Cena - Bischoff/Cena's Job On The Line and WWE Heavyweight Title

Matt Hardy vs Edge - Non Sanctioned

??? vs Triple H - Number One Contendership

Stone Cold Steve Austin On The Highlight Reel

Kurt Angle vs Shelton Benjamin - Teacher vs Student Match II

Carlito vs Eugene - Intercontinental Title

Lita vs Ashley Guest Ref. Christy Hemme

Danny Basham vs Rene Dupree - Flag Match

[Feel Free To Make Predictions. (Choose Who You Think Is Going To Win. Bonus Question: Who's Triple H's Opponent? Second Bonus Question: How Many Asses Is Stone Cold Going To Whoop? Third Bonus Question: If Cena wins, Who will be the new General Manager, If He Loses, Who will Shawn Michael's First Opponent Be For The Title?) Winner gets to e-mail/PM me who they want any title to change hands to :-)]

Edited August 23, 2005 by Inner D Monz

[Michael]

This is very well written and realistic but there is one flaw. Heat and Velocity are taped BEFORE Raw and Smackdown respectively on the same night so you can't have storylines from Smackdown continuing on Velocity because they wouldn't have happened until later that night.

Besides that, this is looking good. Keep the good work up and you could be onto a winner.

[I Don't Mind]

Velocity:

Date: September 17, 2005

Taking the place of Steve Romero tonight was Al Snow, who thankfully has a lot more wrestling knowledge then Romero.

Scotty 2 Hotty and Funaki vs. The Mexicools (Super Crazy and Psychosis w/Juvi)

A great back and forth cruiserweight tag team match, with A LOT of counters. The veterans Scotty and Funaki knew just about everything Crazy and Psychosis had to throw at them, but The Mexicools did have a few surprises up their sleeves hitting some springboard assaults. Mid-match Scotty and Psychosis fought on the outside until Funaki climbed up to the top rope and dove onto the both of them. This feat was topped only by a flipping corkscrew plancha by Super Crazy taking all three of them out. The match came to an end when Juvi pulled Funaki out of the ring after Funaki drove Psychosis down with a Tornado DDT. Juvi mounted Funaki, pounding away at him behind the apron of the ring out of the ref’s visibility. On the inside, Super Crazy nailed Scotty with a big spine buster followed by a Trifecta Moonsault for the three count.

Winners: The Mexicools

Overall Rating: 79

Crowd Rating: 62

Match Rating: 96

These Broads Today…

Big Vito is walking around backstage when he comes across Jillian Hall leaning up against his locker room door, rather flirtatious looking.

Hall: “Vito, how’s it going?”

Vito: “I’m good doll face, how’s about you?”

Hall: “Now that you’re here… terrific. Come here Vito. There’s something I want to show you.”

Vito and Jillian Hall go nose to nose before engaging in a deep passionate kiss to which the crowd groans but almost retches at when Jillian’s hair moves making her blemish visible. As the kiss ends Jillian continues talking.

Jillian: “Vito…”

Vito: “Yeah Dollface?”

Jillian: “I’m sorry.”

With that being their que, Mercury and Nitro jump Vito from behind. They beat down Vito mercilessly with punches and kicks. Jillian walks away from the locker room door looking somewhat remorseful, but as she removes herself from the doorway you can see a steel pipe in the door handle keeping it shut. A banging on the other side of the door begins and from the other side the voice of Nunzio is heard.

Nunzio: “Hey! What’s going on in there! Hey! Open this door! Open this door right now! Damnit open the door!”

Hall and Melina walk away leaving Nitro and Mercury smirking at the beat down they gave.

Mercury: “Oh my god dude, he actually kissed her!”

Nitro: “I didn’t think he’d actually do it either man! God who could ever kiss someone so… repulsive! That thing on her face, I know he knows its there! He must like it or something!”

Mercury: “Alright dude, stop. Just stop. Oh god. I almost threw up that time thinking about it. Oh god, lets just go do our match man. Jesus.”

Mercury takes a deep breath and the two walk off to the ring to proceed with their match.

Overall: 66

::Fade To Commercial::

EC ‘Dub Unleashed!

With MNM in the ring preparing for their opponents the Chair Swinging Freaks, to their surprise Theodore Long’s music hits.

Long: “Mercury, Nitro, you boys think you’re pretty smart don’t ya? Attacking Big Vito back there. Well this is Velocity and Velocity is a branch of Smackdown playas. And so long as I’m in control, there will be control! Holla, holla, holla! So I’m gonna start this off sweet and simple. Jillian Hall, Melina, baby girls, tonight you are banned from ringside! Get to steppin! For once, it’s not that I’m all that worried about you interfering, I just don’t want you to see what’s going to happen to your boys tonight ya feel me? Tonight MNM, as you know your opponents are Axl Rotten and, BRAD Mahoney. What you don’t know is the decision I just made!”

The Chair Swinging Freaks come out on both sides of Theodore Long to a massive pop and ECW Chant as they each hold a chair in their hands and are tugging along a cart full of weapons.

Long: “What I just decided playas, is tonight is going to be a one time only ECW Rules Match!”

The crowd goes absolutely ape-shit with ECW chants as The Chair Swinging Freaks rush the ring and Teddy Long goes backstage.

Overall: 81

Chair Swinging Freaks vs. MNM - ECW Rules

A brutal match that reminded many of the tag matches between The New Age Outlaws and Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie AKA Terry Funk. MNM showed Long who’s boss, nailing The Chair Swinging Freaks with most of the weapons they brought in, such as garbage can lids, garbage cans, Singapore canes, spray-painted steel chairs, and even 2x4’s. Chair Swinging freaks did get Extreme though on MNM hitting veteran hardcore wrestler maneuvers such as T-Bone Suplexes through tables, Flying Legdrops onto steel chairs, DDT’s on Stop Signs. With MNM in control however The Italian Connection got some payback by running down into the ring and beating MNM senseless with lead pipes. After the Italian Connection left, the Chair Swinging Freaks hit their own version of the Conchairto, by Axl first hitting Mercury in the gut with the chair, doubling him over, then holding the chair under his face. Mahoney then nailed Mercury in the back of the head, sandwiching him between the two chairs. They covered Mercury for the three count and that was that.

Winners: Chair Swinging Freaks

Overall Rating: 70

Crowd Rating: 61

Match Rating: 79

::Fade To Commercial::

United States Invitation

Orlando Jordan’s music hits as the US Champion comes down to the ring in his wrestling gear. He climbs into the ring and after parading around with the title for a bit, takes a microphone from the ring crew.

Orlando: “Tonight, I, Orlando Jordan, trainee of the Wrestling God, JBL, makes an open challenge. I know that JBL has taught me better than anyone in that locker room, and thus, I know I can therefore beat anyone in that locker room! On behalf of The Cabinet, I make this challenge so I can put another win up on The Cabinet’s win column. Lets go! Bring em out! Who wants some gold! Who wants some of Orlando Jordan!?”

The music of none other than Orlando’s former ally Doug Basham hits as the ex-Cabinet member comes out on stage with a microphone in hand. As he talks he walks down the aisle and starts circling the ring.

Basham: “Orlando, Orlando, Orlando. Don’t you get it yet man? Don’t you understand? JBL doesn’t give a damn about you man! You’re nothing but a patsy to him! A flunky! A tool! A second-rate pawn in his cheap little games to get in his opponent’s head and steal him a win. I know Orlando, because I was once in your position. It wasn’t long ago that I myself was in The Cabinet. And I know what a jackass JBL can be too! He couldn’t even get my name right and I was doing more work in The Cabinet then he ever did by himself! You think you have any importance to him just because you hold that little piece of gold? That title means nothing to him! Only the World Heavyweight Title means anything to him and THAT is why you’re still a part of The Cabinet. But lets hypothetically say your US Title does mean something to him. If it does, then it’s only to make his Cabinet look more respectable, thus making him look more respectable. And if that is the truth Orlando, then lets see how long he keeps you under his wing when I take that title away from you!”

Basham drops the microphone and slides into the ring starting the match.

Overall: 71

Orlando Jordan vs. Doug Basham

Though a lot of rest holds, the two brought a great technical match to the table. Lots of technical old-school moves such as butterfly suplexes, back drops, and suplexes. The crowd really expected the win as Orlando nailed a big Rydeen Bomb before locking in a Single Leg Crab. Orlando tempted the tap-out for what was seemingly forever before finally grasping the ropes. The end came when Orlando ducked a Clothesline by Basham, turning it into a schoolboy and grabbing the ropes with his free hand. Jordan got the three count making the fans irate, but they weren’t disappointed as Basham Clotheslined Jordan over the top rope and beat the crap out of him all the way to the back where a flock of referees and officials pulled him off. As Basham was held away from Jordan as OJ made the run for it, he continually made the belt sign across his waist.

Winner: Orlando Jordan

Overall Rating: 77

Crowd Rating: 70

Match Rating: 84

Overall: 68

Unforgiven Preview:

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena - Bischoff/Cena's Job On The Line and WWE Heavyweight Title

Matt Hardy vs. Edge - Non Sanctioned

??? Vs. Triple H - Number One Contendership

Stone Cold Steve Austin On The Highlight Reel

Kurt Angle vs. Shelton Benjamin - Teacher vs. Student Match II

Carlito vs. Eugene - Intercontinental Title

Lita vs. Ashley Guest Ref. Christy Hemme

Danny Basham vs. Rene Dupree - Flag Match

[Feel Free To Make Predictions. (Choose Who You Think Is Going To Win. Bonus Question: Who's Triple H's Opponent? Second Bonus Question: How Many Asses Is Stone Cold Going To Whoop? Third Bonus Question: If Cena wins, Who will be the new General Manager, If He Loses, Who will Shawn Michael's First Opponent Be For The Title?) Winner gets to e-mail/PM me who they want any title to change hands to :-)]

[I Don't Mind]

Heat:

Date: September 18, 2005

Doc Marlee and The Coach greet us from their hype studio.

Marlee: “We’ve got a heck of a card lined up for the home viewing audience tonight, isn’t that right coach?”

Coach: “Shut up Doc, don’t you get it by now? It’s the Coach that makes the decisions around here. You don’t make any decisions, the coach does. You’ll get the feel of how things work here soon though, I know you’re still new. Lets take a look at one of our matches tonight. 2005 RAW Diva Search winner Ashley Massaro vs. WWE Diva Lita, with special guest referee 2004 RAW Diva Search contestant, and now Playboy Playmate, Christy Hemme."

A video is shown of the Ashley-Lita confrontation/challenge with Christy getting involved.

The camera comes back to Coach and Doc Marlee.

Marlee: “That’s going to be a heck of a catfight coach. Those two kittens have claws and they’re not afraid to use them on one another!”

Coach: “You’re telling me Doc, but lets take a look at our next matchup on the Unforgiven card. The French Phenom Rene Dupree and Danny Basham who apparently has found a new love for his country.”

Marlee: “Well this is America man, what’s not to love?”

A video is shown of Danny Basham answering Rene Dupree’s challenge on Heat. Highlights of their bloody battle are shown, followed by Dupree costing Basham the IC Title, and their second match together.

The Coach: “Those two superstars face off tonight in a flag match!”

Marlee: “They sure will Coach. Each man’s country’s flag will be on a pole tonight. To win the match, the contestant will have to pull their flag down off the pole.”

The Coach: “Well more or less Doc. Their Flag will be tied to a flag pole, and the flag pole will be tied to a big steel pole. To win you untie your flag pole from the steel pole.”

Marlee: “Exactly what I said.”

The Coach: “Whatever. Ladies and gentlemen we’ve got to take a quick commercial break, but there’s still time to order and make predictions on WWE.com for Unforgiven.”

::Fade To Commercial::

Marlee: “Welcome back folks, Doc Marlee and The Coach here explaining some of the great matchups on the Unforigven card tonight.”

Coach: “You think you‘re so cool Marlee, and it‘s really quite irritating.”

Marlee: “Speaking of people thinking their cool, lets look at our next match up. Carlito defends his Intercontinental title against Eugene! I love Eugene, he’s such a card.”

Coach: “Ha! That’s a good one Marlee, Eugene couldn’t wrestle his way out of a paper bag. Carlito’s my man. Lets take a look at how this feud started.”

A hype video is shown, showing Eugene winning the Number One Contender Match, then beating Carlito and the beating that ensued.

Marlee: “Watching Eugene and Carlito go at it one more time for the IC Title tonight is going to be quite the rush wouldn’t you say Coach?”

Coach: “You bet Doc, almost as big of a rush as I’m sure you get every time you get to announce with The Coach.”

Marlee: “Oh yeah Coach, you caught me red handed, it’s just such a thrill to be working with you. But seriously, how thrilling was Shelton Benjamin taking on Kurt Angle on RAW last Monday Coach?”

Coach: “Oh man, those two got it on in a way we’ve never seen before! They tore the place up. Let’s take a look at why Shelton Benjamin challenged Kurt Angle to this rematch at Unforgiven”

A video is shown of the Benjamin-Eugene Number One Contender Match where the lights went out and Benjamin lost. The next clip on the video is Angle-Benjamin where the lights went out again and Angle was disqualified for holding a chair.

Coach: “Shelton discovered that it was Kurt Angle who ambushed him when the lights went out in his number one contender match with Eugene, and thus the rematch is set up tonight so Shelton can get some payback. Hold on folks we‘re going onto our second commercial break of the night! Remember, there’s still time to order WWE Unforgiven, and place your predictions on WWE.com. Don‘t be a stranger, we’ll be right back.”

::Fade To Commercial::

Marlee: “You know what Coach? I sort of believe Angle was innocent. I smell some foul play afoot. I think who really attacked Shelton is still a mystery.”

Coach: “No, you know who’s a mystery? Is this new kid and his girlfriend, running around beating the hell out of everyone like they own the place!”

Marlee: “I assume you’re talking about CM Punk and Vicki Adams.”

Coach: “Exactly, they’re running around preaching about Straight Edge, and now Punk has threatened to meet The Rattlesnake Stone Cold Steve Austin in the ring tonight on the Highlight Reel! I think he may be getting a little too big for his britches here.”

Marlee: “For once I agree with you Coach, man. CM Punk is a rookie and hasn’t been around here for a long time. Neither have I, but I know enough to know you Stone Cold is not one you want to be messing with! Let’s take a look at this guy CM Punk and what lead to tonight”

A Hype video for CM Punk is shown, attacking RVD on Heat, attacking him again on RAW on The Highlight Reel, attacking Val Venis and his interview on Steve Austin.

Coach: “Vince McMahon said it best when he said that was going to be explosive.”

Marlee: “What about the next match Coach. Let’s talk about the Number One Contendership for the WWE Heavyweight Title.”

Coach: “You know there are a lot of guys who would kill for the opportunity to face the champ, but who more opportunistic, who more driven… then Triple H? Let’s take a look.”

A video showing Triple H’s return to intimidate Bischoff, followed by Bischoff announcing he can have his match but the opponent will be a mystery.

Marlee: “That Bischoff’s a slippery eel Coach. Who knows who Triple H’s opponent will be!”

Coach: “It could be just about anyone Doc! Chris Jericho! Steve Austin! Maybe even Triple H’s own manager, Ric Flair.”

Marlee: “There are many uncertainties about tonight Coach, that’s for sure. However, what is certain is that the next feud we look at is going to be one of the bloodiest, most hate-filled feuds in WWE in a long, long time.”

Coach: “Ah yes, you must be talking about Edge vs. Matt Hardy. This match was destined to be so brutal, so barbaric! That WWE… couldn’t even sanction it! It will be stricken from the record books, lets take a look at how it went down.”

A video is shown of Hardy losing to Edge at Unforgiven, then nailing Lita with the Twist Of Fate. The video shows clips of Edge’s interview afterwards, and the attacks on Matt Hardy, ending with Hardy screwing Edge in his Triple Threat match.

Coach: “That’s going to be as brutal as they come Doc. However folks we’ve got to take our last commercial break of the night. When we come back we’ll look at the build up to our Main Event for Unforgiven, and our match here on Heat which will be a six-man tag team match!”

Marlee: “That’s right Coach, RAW’s Superheroes, The Hurricane and Rosey tag with Tyson Tomko - The Problem Solver, to take on The Masterpieces, Chris Masters and Snitsky along with The Conman - Rob Conway. Stay tuned folks, don’t change that channel!”

Coach: “And remember to order Unforgiven and make those predictions because the time draws near, for Unforgiven!”

::Fade To Commercial::

Coach: “You know Doc, John Cena has been a thorn in everybody’s side since he moved over here from Smackdown. But no one hates Cena more then Eric Bischoff.”

Marlee: “You’re telling me Coach, Bischoff loathes Cena. But I think we couldn’t even properly describe the hatred Bischoff has for Cena, so lets just show it instead.”

A video is shown of Cena’s debut on RAW, getting on bad terms with Eric Bischoff, winning against Chris Jericho (Bischoff’s hand-chosen Number One Contender) Shawn Michaels attacking Cena thus becoming the new Number One Contender, and the challenge - Bischoff’s Job vs. Cena’s Job, all on the line as Cena takes on HBK in the Main Event.

Coach: “I’m not afraid for my boss’s job because I do have faith in Shawn Michaels, but it is totally unfair that Mr. Bischoff should even put his job up on the line!”

Marlee: “RAW definitely will feel different without Eric Bischoff screwing it up.”

Coach: “Hey! You watch your mouth Doc. Anyways ladies and gentleman, its time for the Heat Main Event! Be sure to go order Unforgiven and make your predictions on WWE.Com. This is The Coach…”

Marlee: “And Doc Marlee…”

Coach: “Signing off.”

Hurricane, Rosey, and Tyson Tomko w/Stacy Keibler vs. Chris Masters, Snitsky, and Rob Conway

A big old Hoss-fest with the exception of Conway and The Hurricane. Conway and Hurricane got man-handled by everyone else in this match but when the two went head-to-head it was beautiful. Arm drags, rest holds, and a Flying Crossbody off the top rope by The Hurricane. The Problem Solver was the MVP of the match though, really taking it to Masters, Snitsky and Conway. RAW’s Superheroes began battling Snitsky and Conway on the outside of the ring after Snitsky and Conway tried to attack Stacy for distracting the referee during a pin. On the inside Tyson Tomko hit an unsuspecting Chris Masters with the Chainsaw Kick for the three count.

Winners: Hurricane, Rosey, and Tyson Tomko w/Stacy Keibler

Overall Rating: 71

Crowd Rating: 66

Match Rating: 76

Unforgiven Preview:

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena - Bischoff/Cena's Job On The Line and WWE Heavyweight Title

Matt Hardy vs. Edge - Non Sanctioned

??? Vs. Triple H - Number One Contendership

Stone Cold Steve Austin On The Highlight Reel

Kurt Angle vs. Shelton Benjamin - Teacher vs. Student Match II

Carlito vs. Eugene - Intercontinental Title

Lita vs. Ashley Guest Ref. Christy Hemme

Danny Basham vs. Rene Dupree - Flag Match

[Last Chance To Make Predictions. (Choose Who You Think Is Going To Win. Bonus Question: Who's Triple H's Opponent? Second Bonus Question: How Many Asses Is Stone Cold Going To Whoop? Third Bonus Question: If Cena wins, Who will be the new General Manager, If He Loses, Who will Shawn Michael's First Opponent Be For The Title?) Winner gets to e-mail/PM me who they want any title to change hands to :-)]

[The End]

Unforgiven Preview:

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena - Bischoff/Cena's Job On The Line and WWE Heavyweight Title

John Cena-Booking wise it just wouldn't fit to have Cena fired. Sure he could go to Smackdown but he technically just appeared on Raw so I can't see him going back. Bonus Question-Would be good to see Bret Hart but reality would say no.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge - Non Sanctioned

Matt Hardy-Kind of needs this win to make anything he's done credible. Unless of course you're gonna go the WWE's route and completely kill any credibility he has.

??? Vs. Triple H - Number One Contendership

Triple H-I think he's going to win and I think his opponent is going to be Kane

Stone Cold Steve Austin On The Highlight Reel

Bonus Question: I say that he's not going to "Whoop" anyone because he'll be too busy getting his ass handed to him by CM Punk. Of course I see RVD coming to save Austin but I still say Punk gets away before anything happens.

Kurt Angle vs. Shelton Benjamin - Teacher vs. Student Match II

Shelton Benjamin-Don't think Angle needs this win and I think a loss would serve to drive him even more off the deep end.

Carlito vs. Eugene - Intercontinental Title

Carlito-For the sake of sanity.

Lita vs. Ashley Guest Ref. Christy Hemme

Lita-Christy Hemme turn, it's what I'd do, but then again I could care less about the women's division.

Danny Basham vs. Rene Dupree - Flag Match

Rene Dupree-Of course there has to be another match that nobody cares about. Dupree is the guy who should be getting the push, which translates to him winning this match.

Now Feedback for the dairy, I've actually enjoyed your writing, and feel that you've captured the guys great in your promo's. A few booking mistakes in my opinion but nothing that can't be fixed as the diary continues. Good work.

[I Don't Mind]

Unforgiven:

Date: September 18, 2005

JR: “Welcome ladies and gentlemen to WWE RAW Presents: Unforgiven!”

King: “We’ve got a heck of a line up tonight JR. Oh and it looks like the match of the night is going to happen right now! Puppies!”

Ashley Massaro vs. Lita - Special Guest Referee - Christy Hemme

Ashley Massaro comes down first to the ring, getting a fairly low pop from being so new. Lita comes down next and gets a lot of heat. Christy Hemme comes down last in a referee shirt to a fairly ok pop. Ashley and Lita go nose to nose and then take turns shoving each other. The two lock up in a collar-elbow tie-up which turns into each competitor tearing at one another’s hair. Christy tries to get between them but SWEARVE Ashley plows down Christy with a big Clothesline. Lita and Ashley smile at one another before they team up and begin kicking away at the fallen Christy. They pick her up only long enough for Lita to spike her head into the mat with a DDT. Ashley and Lita share a high five before leaving with one another’s arms draped over each other’s shoulders.

Overall: 70

The camera goes over to JR and The King at the announcers booth.

JR: “What has gotten into 2005 Diva Search Winner Ashley Massaro, King?"

King: “I have no idea JR. But it’s clear that Lita and Ashley have joined forces. I wanted Ashley to make friends here on RAW but I think it’s safe to say she needs to learn how to make better friends.”

JR: “Christy is being helped out of the ring now by a team of referees. This is tragic, I hope she’s ok. Anyways, lets move on, lets change focus and digress. Next up is our Flag match between Rene Dupree and Danny Basham, lets take a look at how this all started.”

The hype video is shown of Danny Basham answering Rene Dupree’s challenge on Heat. Highlights of their bloody battle are shown, followed by Dupree costing Basham the IC Title, and their second match together.

Rene Dupree vs. Danny Basham - Flag Match

Basham makes his entrance first to a lot of USA chants. Apparently his gimmick is getting him quite over, quite quickly. Rene Dupree comes out next to a lot of heat, of course, being the anti-American with a microphone in hand.

Rene: “Look at this dumpster of an arena! This is definitely American built. Or maybe it was us Canadian Frenchman that built this dumpster… for the sole purpose to store all you American Trash in it! Tonight, the French Phenom will retrieve his French-Canadian flag, and wave it proudly! Because there is no flag more beautiful, and more uplifting then the French-Canadian flag! I’m the only man who could win this sort of the match because I’m the French Phenom, which makes me simply… phenomenal!”

Dupree dropped the microphone and climbed into the ring. The two stare each other down in the center of the ring, with some trash talk thrown out at one another. Dupree slaps Basham, to which he receives a series of right hands to start this off. Basham whips Dupree off the ropes and ducks down for a Back Body Drop but gets kicked in the face. Dupree goes for a clothesline but Basham ducks it and hit’s a Back Drop. Basham slams Dupree down on the mat with a big Stalling Suplex then fires up the crowd as he climbs the ropes to untie his flag. Dupree gets up and pulls Basham down off the ropes, nailing several right hands before attempting to whip Basham off the ropes, only for it to get reversed. Dupree ducks a clothesline this time and on the way back, drops Basham with a back elbow to the face. Dupree slams Basham down with a scoop slam then hit’s the French Tickler. Dupree now climbs the ropes to get his flag, but Basham nails him from behind with some forearms to the back. Basham climbs up the ropes and slams Dupree’s head into the steel pole twice before throwing him back down onto the mat. Basham climbs to the top rope and as Dupree gets up, he catches him with a Flying Axe Handle. Basham goes for the Gutwrench Powerbomb but Dupree slips out the backdoor. Dupree staggers over to the ropes and as Basham approaches finds himself on the receiving end of the Hotshot. Dupree then picked Basham up onto his shoulder for the Snake Eyes as he charges towards the corner of his flag, but Basham slips out the back door and shoved Dupree face first into the steel pole. Dupree staggers back over to Basham and receives a Fisherman Suplex, which Basham is calling the Old Glory Suplex. Both men are down but Basham makes it to his feet first. Basham slowly climbs the ropes and begins to untie his flag but Dupree crawls over and stands up between Basham’s legs, slamming him down with a Powerbomb. With both men down after the Powerbomb, Dupree makes it to his feet first and signals for the end. Dupree picks Basham up and goes for the Dupree Driver (Michinoku Driver II) but Basham rakes the eyes and after slipping out, nails Dupree with the Gutwrench Powerbomb. Basham climbs back up the ropes and finishes untying his flag, and waves it around as the victor. Basham then lays the flag over Dupree’s body. Dupree wakes up to see Red White and Blue and begins spazzing out. Dupree rolls out of the ring and makes his way up the aisle, wiping of his face in disgust of the flag.

Winner: Danny Basham

Overall Rating: 79

Crowd Rating: 76

Match Rating: 82

JR: “USA prevails again King.”

King: “I’m glad somebody finally gave the French Phenom what he deserves, a good ass kicking!”

JR: “It was a slobber knocker King, no doubt. But next up is our Intercontinental Title match with your favorite Carlito, vs. my favorite, EUGENE!”

King: “Oh God. How can you like Eugene JR? Here let’s roll the footage so maybe I can see what it is you like about him.”

The hype video is shown, showing Eugene winning the Number One Contender Match, then beating Carlito and the beating that ensued.

Carlito is shown backstage holding his Intercontinental Title with Todd Grisham by his side with a microphone.

Grisham: “Carlito. Tonight you face off against Eugene one on one for your Intercontinental Title. Now last week Eugene beat you in a singles match in a non-title match. Are you at all intimidated by Eugene’s win last week over you?”

Carlito: “Intimidated? Todd what question… it’s not cool! Just like you! Eugene got lucky last week, that’s all. I was going easy on him, but tonight things will be different! Tonight Carlito walks in Intercontinental Champion, and walks out Intercontinental Champion! Now That! That’s cool!”

Carlito takes out his apple and starts tossing it into the air and catching it making Todd Grisham nervous. As Carlito goes to bite it he stops before his mouth touches it.

Carlito: “You know what Todd? I think I’ll save this apple for Eugene. Just like last week. Because Eugene is not cool, and you know me. I spit in the face of people who aren’t cool!”

Carlito vs. Eugene - Intercontinental Title

Eugene came down first, followed by Carlito. The two circled the ring a little before locking up in a collar-elbow tie-up. Carlito locks on a tight headlock that puts a smile on his face, but Carlito was not so happy when Eugene broke the headlock by whipping Carlito off the ropes. Eugene dropped down as Carlito jumped over him, but on the rebound off the ropes Carlito got plowed down by the comical Eugene via a shoulder block. Eugene gave a goofy Hulk Hogan taunt before running around the ring slapping his head and waving. The two stare down before going to lock horns again, but this time Carlito gave Eugene a cheap boot the gut followed by a few right forearms to the face. Carlito whipped Eugene into the opposing corner with such velocity that he bounced right out into a running Clothesline from Carlito. Carlito covered Eugene for a two count then applied another side headlock. Eugene pulled himself to his feet and nailed Carlito with a Back Drop. As Carlito pulled himself to his hands and knees, Eugene mounted his back and began to ride him like a horsy, slapping his back comically. Carlito rolled forward, catapulting Eugene into the turnbuckles but Eugene saved his head by stopping himself from hitting the turnbuckles. As Carlito got back up he charged at Eugene for a Clothesline but Eugene ducked it, and floated over into a DDT, shades of The Rock. Eugene applauded himself for this and covered Carlito for a two count. Eugene picked Carlito up but Carlito nailed Eugene with a rake to the eyes. Eugene staggered over to the corner where he received several boots to the gut from Carlito, dropping him down to the mat. Carlito then began to choke Eugene with his boot until the referee pulled him away. Carlito exited the ring and reentered the ring with his apple. Eugene crawled over to Carlito on his hands and knees only to receive a boot to the back of the head. Carlito took a big bite into the apple and spit it right in the face of Eugene. This caused Eugene to snap! Carlito tossed the apple out of the ring and picked Eugene up. He slammed Eugene’s head into the turnbuckle but to no effect. He slammed his head again and again but still to no effect. Eugene began to Hulk Up before unleashing his fury on Carlito with rights and lefts at every turn. Eugene gave Carlito not one arm wringer, but two, to which Carlito went for a right hand but Eugene ducked it releasing the arm wringer and floated behind Carlito hitting a German Suplex. Eugene went for the Stunner but Carlito shoved Eugene off chest first into the ropes, throwing him back into a Schoolboy with Carlito’s feet on the second rope for the three count. Carlito grabbed his IC belt and made a dash up the aisle.

Winner: Carlito

Overall Rating: 78

Crowd Rating: 74

Match Rating: 83

JR: “That damn Carlito! He just screwed poor Eugene out of the Intercontinental Title!”

King: “What are you talking about JR? Carlito pinned Eugene fair and square.”

JR: “Fair and Square my big Oklahoma butt King! Carlito had his feet on the ropes!”

King: “I didn’t see anything like that!”

JR: “Yeah, big surprise! You don’t see when your favorite in the match is cheating, go figure. Alright folks lets talk about our next match! Shelton Benjamin takes on Kurt Angle.”

King: “Yeah, better show the video for our next match before JR has a heart attack.”

A video is shown of the Benjamin-Eugene Number One Contender Match where the lights went out and Benjamin lost. The next clip on the video is Angle-Benjamin where the lights went out again and Angle was disqualified for holding a chair.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Kurt Angle - Teacher vs. Student Match II

Angle makes his entrance first to a lot of “You Suck” chants as usual. Shelton makes his entrance next to a big reaction, as he runs down the aisle and slides into the ring. Angle and Benjamin mat wrestle for a good minute and a half, just counter after counter, sliding over and under and all around one another with neither getting any clear advantage. Finally Angle just clearly shoved Benjamin off of him looking irate that he can’t win. The two tie-up with Angle getting a side-headlock on Benjamin. Benjamin goes for a Back Drop but Angle lands on his feet. Angle goes for a right hand but Benjamin ducks it floating behind Angle and locking him in a hammerlock, but floating back around turning it into a front-facelock. Angle goes for a Northern Lights Suplex but Benjamin lands on his feet. Benjamin now goes for a right hand but Angle ducks it going behind Benjamin for a German Suplex. Benjamin goes for a back elbow to break the waistlock but Angle ducks and Benjamin spins himself around still in Angle’s waistlock. Angle nails Benjamin with a Overhead Belly to Belly Suplex for only a two count. Angle locks in a Surfboard like submission with a knee in the downed Benjamin’s back and a crossface around his mouth but he releases it after resting. Angle picks Benjamin up and whips him into the corner but Benjamin grabs hold of the top rope and throws his feet into the air as Angle charges. Angle however stops short and grabs Benjamin’s feet, throwing him over the ropes onto the apron. Angle goes for a right hand that Benjamin ducks and Benjamin hits Angle with a Neckbeaker over the ropes. Benjamin climbs back up onto the apron and as Angle crawls to his feet holding his neck, Benjamin nails Angle with the Springboard Bulldog for a two count. Benjamin picks Angle up, but Angle slips behind Benjamin nailing him with a big German Suplex. Angle still has the waist lock in on Benjamin and hit’s the German two more times for the Hat Trick. Angle and Benjamin pull themselves up slowly, Angle still holding his neck. Angle charges at Benjamin who pulled himself up by the ropes and Benjamin Back Body Drops Angle over the top rope to the ground below. Benjamin fires up the crowd as Angle pulls himself back up, then bounces off the ropes and hit’s a senton over the top rope onto Angle for a “Holy Shit” chant. Benjamin yells that that’s it and throws Angle in the ring. Benjamin picks Angle up but Angle trips him and locks him in the Angle Lock. Benjamin begins hopping on one foot as the other is in the Angle Lock and reaches for the ropes but Angle won’t allow him to get it. Benjamin throws his foot that he’s hopping on up and catches Angle with a Dragonwhip like kick on the side of the head knocking him goofy. Benjamin crawls over to Angle and covers him for the two count. Benjamin picks Angle up one more time and this time nails him with the T-Bone Suplex. Benjamin covers Angle - One! Two! The lights go out for a few seconds and when they come back on the referee and Shelton Benjamin are unconscious in the ring. Kerwin White stands over them with a steel chair in hand. Kerwin throws Angle’s arm over Shelton and throws the referee over to the pin where he slowly counts the three. Kerwin drops the chair and picks Shelton’s limp body up. Kerwin nails Benjamin with a Brainbuster right onto the steel chair before leaving.

Winner: Kurt Angle

Overall Rating: 93

Crowd Rating: 90

Match Rating: 96

JR: “That was a brutal assault but Kerwin White.”

King: “I don’t quite understand it JR, why would Kerwin attack Shelton?”

JR: “I have an idea but I’ll save my opinions for later. I can not believe the brutal assault we witnessed. However ladies and gentleman, next up we have possibly the most explosive segment to ever grace a pay per view.”

King: “Alright baby! Chris Jericho’s Highlight Reel featuring Stone Cold Steve Austin!”

JR: “Up and comer CM Punk with his girlfriend Vicki Adams have threatened to crash The Highlight Reel and face Stone Cold face to face.”

King: “Oh boy. Lets take a look at how this all built itself up.”

A Hype video for CM Punk is shown, attacking RVD on Heat, attacking him again on RAW on The Highlight Reel, attacking Val Venis and his interview on Steve Austin.

SXE vs. The Rattlesnake

The Highlight Reel is set up in the ring but there’s no sign of anyone in the set. Suddenly the countdown appears on the screen and after an explosion the host of the Highlight Reel, Chris Jericho comes down to the ring and take a microphone from the ring crew.

Y2J: “Welcome to, Unforgiven! Is! Jericho! Tonight it is my dishonor to interview one of the biggest Assclowns in the industry! The man is an utter joke lets face it! He calls himself The Rattlesnake, because he wishes he had an Anaconda like Y2J. Lets bring him out, the biggest piece of Texas trailer park trash walking the earth! Stone Cold Steve Austin!”

Glass Shatters as the whole stadium stands up and freaks out. Austin walks down the aisle wearing his newest Stone Cold merchandise. Austin climbs into the ring and starts mounting the turnbuckles, throwing up the middle fingers. Austin has to forcefully move part of Jericho’s set to get to his forth turnbuckle which irritates Y2J. Finally Austin takes a microphone from the ring crew.

Y2J: “Austin, who the hell do you think you are? What were you thinking last week attacking me in my match against The Big Show!? Let’s show the footage on the insanely expensive Jeri-Tron 5000.”

The video of Austin attacking Jericho in his match with The Big Show is shown.

Y2J: “What the hell was that about you jackass!? What were you trying to prove or say just there!?”

Austin: “What Stone Cold was trying to say… was what he has always said, and what he always will say. And that is DTA… Don’t, Trust…”

Y2J: “Yeah, yeah, yeah, don’t trust anybody. No one gives a rats ass about any of that stupid crap! Now they only care about me! The first Undisputed Champion! And I beat your ass to do it Steve!”

Austin: “What? If you let me finish, What? I said if you let me finish before you go on making it all about yourself. I was going to say Don’t Trust Austin you stupid son of a bitch! And that’s all I got to say about that so you best move your little carcass on with another question because I’m done answering that one.”

Y2J: “Yeah? Well what if I don’t want to move on to the next question Austin. Then what?”

Austin: “What? Well then… I’d have to stomp a mudhole in your ass, and walk it dry! What? I’ll open up a can of whoop ass on you boy! What? If you want Stone Cold to drink a beer, whoop this sorry sum’bitches ass and raise some hell gimme a hell yeah!”

The crowd explodes with a “Hell Yeah” But before Austin can do anything the music if CM Punk hits. Punk and his girlfriend Vicki Adams come down to the ring and take a microphone from ring crew.

Punk: “Stone Cold Steve Austin. It’s an honor and a disgrace at the same time. On one hand you’ve accomplished more than a lot of people in the back can ever hope to accomplish! You’re an icon. You’re a legend! But… you’re not CM Punk. You’re not Straight Edge! And you never will be Steve. My name is CM Punk and I am the only Straight Edge Superstar in the WWE Today Steve! I got to where I am today without drinking, doing drugs, or sleeping my way to the top! Unlike you. How did you get where you are Steve? What? I’ll tell you how you got here. You got here by raising your middle fingers, getting drunk off your ass and attacking people from behind!"

Austin: “CM Punk, I see where you’re coming from. And believe it or not, I like you. not a lot, but like you. I respect that you fight for what you believe in. What? I respect that you whoop people’s asses to get through to them, and send a message. What? I also respect that hell, you can kiss my ass. I didn’t get to where I am today by raising middle fingers and drinking beer. I got where I am today by raising hell and drinking beer! I’m a legend in the back and to these people out here because I’m the best there was in my prime, and probably the best there is today too.”

Punk: “Wrong again Steve. The Straight Edge Superstar is the best today. Straight Edge means no drugs, no alcohol, no promiscuous sex, or basically, Straight Edge means I’m better than you!”

Austin: “If you want me to whip this sorry son of a bitches’ ass, give me a hell yeah!”

“HELL YEAH” The crowd screams but as CM gets his fighting face on, Jericho nails Austin in the back of the head with a forearm. Punk and Jericho pound away on Austin with right hands and boots. They pick him up and bring him over to the corner of the ring where they take turns taking shots at him. Austin then grabs Punk and throws him into the corner and unleashes right hands on him. The crowd goes crazy for Punk finally getting his. Austin turns around and gives Jericho a boot to the gut. Vicki Adams hands a chain to CM Punk that he wraps around his fist. Austin goes for the Stunner on Jericho but gets shoved off into Punk who nails Austin with a chain to the head, busting him open. Jericho and Punk team up again to pound away on Austin. Jericho ascends the turnbuckles to mock Austin’s taunts as Punk goes on the other side of the ring and throws out the Straight Edge X with his arms. Austin pulls himself up the ropes and shoves Jericho off the turnbuckle, sending him tumbling to the outside. CM Punk turns around and gets a boot to the gut followed a Stone Cold Stunner. Jericho slides into the ring with a chair and swings at Austin who ducks it. Jericho turns back around right into the Stone Cold Stunner. Vicki Adams climbs into the ring and grabs CM Punk’s chain. Vicki goes to strike Austin with the chain but Austin shoots her a look that stops her dead in her tracks. Austin advances on Vicki Adams then gives her a boot to the gut, followed by a Stunner. Austin has a beer bash and pours the beer all over Punk and Adams before leaving.

Overall: 95

??? vs. Triple H w/Ric Flair

Triple H’s music hits as The Game comes down to the ring accompanied by Ric Flair. They climb onto the apron with spot line on HHH, as he spits his water dramatically. Flair waits in the corner with a cocky expression while Triple H preps himself up by pulling on the ropes and pacing back and forth. Finally his opponent’s music hits and much to their dismay it’s the music of The Big Show. The seven footer comes down the aisle and Triple H exit’s the ring to try and cut him off from the ring. Triple H gets in only two shots before Big Show knocks him down with a big Headbutt. Show grabs Triple H and throws him over the barricade and into the crowd. Big Show follows him in but Triple H scores some cheap right hands. Triple H backs up and charges at Big Show, only to get a big Back Body Drop back over the barricade onto the concrete ringside floor. Show climbs back over the barricade and throws Triple H into the ring. Big Show climbs in too as the match officially starts. Show picks Triple H and with a mere hip toss throws Triple H clear across the ring. Triple H holds onto his back in agony as he tries to get a breather in the corner. Big Show approaches and after licking his hand gives Triple H a ear shattering slap to the chest. Four more follow, each easy to hear throughout the arena. Show whips Triple H into the opposing corner so hard that he flies over the top rope to the ground below. Flair tries to buy Triple H some time by jumping on the apron but gets hip tossed into the ring with Show. Flair tries to get away from Show but gets grabbed by the belt as he tries to reexit the ring. Show grabs Flair by the throat and lifts him up but Triple H slides back into the ring and hits Show with a shot to the back of the knee, dropping him down to size and giving Flair the opportunity to escape. Triple H delivers a few stiff right hands before whipping The Big Show off the ropes, but Show reverses. Show ducks down for a Back Body Drop but Triple H hit’s the Face Buster onto his knee that takes the big man down. Triple H covers Big Show for a mere two count before Show powers out with authority. Triple H hits Big Show with a knee to the gut before whipping him off the ropes. Triple H bounces off the opposing ropes and goes for a Clothesline but Big Show ducks it. They bounce off opposing ropes again and this time Triple H hits Big Show with a Flying Knee Attack that drops him down for another two count. Triple H picks Big Show up and sets him up for the Pedigree but Show Back Body Drops The Game. Show nails Triple H with the Hog Log and covers him for only a two count. Show signals for the Show Stopper but as he lifts Triple H up and grabs him by the throat, Triple H delivers a kick to the gut and this time connects with the Pedigree. Triple H covers Big Show but to the crowd’s shock, Big Show kicked out. Triple H stomps around the ring clearly frustrated that he can’t keep the big man down. Triple H climbs out of the ring and pulls a Sledgehammer out from underneath the ring. Triple H climbs back into the ring and waits for Show to get to his feet. As he does Triple H goes to strike but the referee grabs the sledgehammer and pulls it away. The referee goes to put the sledgehammer away, but as he hands it to the ring crew and instructs him not to let Triple H have it, The Game scores a low blow on Big Show and Ric Flair slid a chair into the ring, which Triple H hit the Pedigree on top of. Triple H slid the chair out of the ring before covering the giant for the three count, making him the number one contender.

Winner: Triple H

Overall Rating: 85

Crowd Rating: 89

Match Rating: 79

King: “I knew it JR! Triple H really is that damn good! He’s going on to face the WWE Champion!”

JR: “Maybe so, but it took Ric Flair and steel chair to do it! The win came not without controversy however Triple H is indeed the number one contender.”

We cut backstage to John Cena holding his WWE Heavyweight Title, and who is standing with Maria.

Maria: “John usually you’re a fun-loving, carefree type of guy. Tonight however you seem to have a different look on your face. What I’m trying to say here to be blunt. Are you going to kick Shawn Michael’s butt?”

Cena: “Maria, honey, tonight isn’t about vengeance. Tonight isn’t about payback, and how I want to bloody Shawn Michaels. I’m not setting out to end Shawn Michaels’ career. This isn’t all that personal between me and Shawn Michaels, this is about me and Eric Bischoff. Since I moved to RAW he’s been on my back and I’m only facing HBK tonight to get rid of that punk! He says I’m a fake, a phony, a scared little white kid trying to play rapper! Well guess what Bisch? I’m real. This title, this is real! And as I always say, Real... recognizes Real! Tonight me and the Chain Gang are going to pin HBK, one-two-three to get rid of your punk ass! HBK is a hell of an athlete but I would face anyone at anytime anywhere to get rid of you Eric Bischoff! Because this ... is what ... we do! And if anybody wants some? COME GET SOME! Bischoff, I guarantee that by the time tonight is over… you WILL… see… me!”

JR: “This thing between Shawn Michaels and John Cena isn’t all that personal, but the feud between Cena and Bischoff sure is.”

King: “You’re telling me JR. This thing between Cena and Bischoff has been brutal but it all ends tonight between them. However our next match is going to be possibly the most brutal tonight JR.”

JR: “Oh without a doubt King. Matt Hardy vs. Edge in an unsanctioned match, this is going to be a bloodbath like no other. Lets show the audience.”

The hype video is shown of Hardy losing to Edge at Unforgiven, then nailing Lita with the Twist Of Fate. The video shows clips of Edge’s interview afterwards, and the attacks on Matt Hardy, ending with Hardy screwing Edge in his Triple Threat match.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge w/Lita - Non-Sanctioned Match

Matt Hardy came out first to a large ovation especially when he began throwing up the V-1 sign. Edge came out next accompanied by Lita to a lot of heat. As soon as Edge got in the ring Hardy attacked. The two engaged in a wild brawl the resulted in Hardy backing Edge into the corner. Edge reversed an irish whip and pulled Hardy into a Short Arm Clothesline. Edge laid in some boots on Matt Hardy before picking him up and slamming his head repeatedly into the turnbuckle. Edge whipped Hardy into the opposing corner then began untying the turnbuckles Hardy was formally in. Just as Edge managed to get the turnbuckle pad off Hardy charged at him. Edge lifted Hardy up and dropped him face first onto the exposed steel, busting him open. Edge kicked Hardy in the gut and went for the Edgeucution, but Hardy countered with an Inverted Atomic Drop. Hardy gave Edge a Cactus Clothesline over the top rope sending them both tumbling to the ground below. Hardy pulled a fire extinguisher out from underneath the ring and sprayed it in Edge’s eyes before slamming it into his face. Hardy dropped the fire extinguisher and just plain threw Edge head first into the steel steps. Hardy laid Edge’s body across the steel steps as Hardy climbed up onto the apron. Hardy dropped a Legdrop off the apron onto the back of the head of Edge sending him flipping over off of the steel steps. Hardy shuffled through the weapons under the ring once more this time pulling out a steel chair. Hardy went to strike Edge but Edge dodged it and Hardy hit the steel steps, hurting his hands and causing him to drop the chair. Edge pulled himself up and as Hardy went for a right hand, Edge ducked it, floated behind Hardy and nailed him with the Edge-O-Matic onto the concrete floor. Edge pulled a table out from underneath the ring and set it up on top of the apron and the barricade. Edge picked Hardy up and laid him across the table. Hardy would have none of it though and fired off some right hands on Edge. Hardy slammed Edge’s head into the barricade and pulled a ladder out from underneath the ring. Hardy put the ladder down and picked Edge up. Lita came behind Hardy and gave him a kick between the legs, which gave Edge the opportunity to deliver a Scoop Slam onto the ladder on Hardy. Edge pulled a steel chair out from underneath the ring and as Hardy pulled himself up, Edge struck him across the head with it, flooring him once more. Edge dropped the chair and pulled out another chair. Edge placed on chair underneath Hardy’s head and picked up the other chair. Hardy rolled out of the way of the One Man Conchairto that caused Edge to drop his chair. Edge kicked Hardy in the head to keep him down. Edge then leaned the ladder up against the ring post and picked Hardy up. Edge whipped Hardy back first into the ladder knocking him and the ladder down. Edge set the ladder up beside the table and brought Hardy over to the table. Hardy delivered a shot between the legs of Edge then nailed him between the eyes with a steel chair busting him open and sending him over onto the table. Hardy ascended the ladder and after throwing up the V-1 sign from the top of the ladder, dove off for a Legdrop. Edge rolled off the table and Hardy drove himself through. After a long pause in the match of both men being down Edge got up first and folded up the ladder, sliding it into the ring along with Hardy. Edge picked up the folded ladder and as Hardy made it to his feet, Edge used the Ladder as a battering ram, slamming it into Hardy’s face and knocking him back down. Edge exited the ring and took out another table, sliding it into the ring. Edge set the table up along the side of the ring and put the ladder in the middle of the ring not to far away. Edge gave Hardy a baseball slide right to the ribs that sent him to the outside of the ring. As Edge went to get Hardy through the ropes he found a chair shot across the head by Hardy. Hardy threw the chair into the ring and slid in after it. A bloody Matt Hardy grabs Edge’s suitcase and blasts him across the face with it before throwing it out of the ring. Lita entered the ring to try and attack Hardy but found herself on the receiving end of the Side Effect. Edge then nailed Hardy with a chair shot that left Hardy down. Edge dropped the chair and rolled Hardy onto the table. Edge climbed up to the top of the ladder but so slow that Hardy was already on the other side of the ladder meeting him at the top. The two exchanged blows at the top of the ladder before Edge set Hardy up for the DDT, signaling to DDT Hardy off the ladder through the table. Hardy however slammed Edge’s head into the top of the ladder and set him up for the DDT. Hardy threw the V-1 sign into the air and nailed a Twist Of Fate off the top of the ladder through a table for a “Holy Shit” chant. Hardy draped his arm over Edge for the three count. Hardy and Lita were escorted out of the ringside area via referees and officials while Edge left on a stretcher.

Winner: Matt Hardy

Overall Rating: 81

Crowd Rating: 84

Match Rating: 75

JR: “A brutal and barbaric match that I don’t know will ever be topped. I have sincere concerns for the health of all three of those wrestlers, and hope them all a speedy recovery.”

King: “Well if you ask me Hardy got just what he deserved. Now its time for our main event JR! I can’t wait. Either John Cena, or Eric Bischoff will be fired after tonight haha! If Cena wins he keeps his WWE Title and his job, not to mention he gets to name the new General Manager of RAW! But if Eric Bischoff wins, HBK is the new champ and Cena’s off RAW for good!”

JR: “Let’s take a look at how this all built up to this point”

The hype video is shown of Cena’s debut on RAW, getting on bad terms with Eric Bischoff, winning against Chris Jericho (Bischoff’s hand-chosen Number One Contender) Shawn Michaels attacking Cena thus becoming the new Number One Contender, and the challenge - Bischoff’s Job vs. Cena’s Job, all on the line as Cena takes on HBK in the Main Event.

Shawn Michaels is shown backstage in his locker room when Todd Grisham appears by him.

Grisham: “Shawn Michaels, your match is next. You have the opportunity of winning the WWE Title tonight, saving your boss’s job, and getting rid of John Cena for life. What’s going through your head right now?”

HBK: “You know Todd, you pretty much summed up all the pressure that’s on my shoulders tonight. Or did you? To be honest Todd I really don’t give a damn about Eric Bischoff! I don’t really much care about John Cena either. Cena is just another bump in my path to the WWE Title. That’s all I care about Todd is the WWE Title. Having the WWE Title around your waist says that you are the best! Now I know that I’m the best but I don’t think it’d hurt to have a piece of gold that publicly states that fact. I need a piece of gold Josh, I need THAT gold. I need something I can wear that says, Hey! Here’s a guy who’s exactly what he says he is. He is the showstopper, the headliner, the main event, the icon that is the Heartbreak Kid! HBK is going to bring it to Cena tonight with everything I’ve got! Not for Bischoff, not to get rid of Cena, but for myself! The Heartbreak Kid can keep it up all night! And I will because The Heartbreak Kid lays down for absolutely nobody!”

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena - Cena’s Job vs. Bischoff’s Job & WWE Title

John Cena came out first to a huge ovation. Next was Shawn Michaels who got a lot of heat but also a smattering of cheers. Cena and HBK looked around as the bell rang because surprisingly there was no referee in the ring! The music of Eric Bischoff as Bischoff comes down the aisle in a referee outfit. Cena begins mouthing profanities but with Bischoff holding Cena’s attention, HBK jumps him from behind. Michaels opens up on him with right hands and forearms until Cena is backed up in the corner. HBK then unleashes a series of stiff chops to the chest. HBK brought Cena to the middle of the ropes and whipped him off of them. HBK went for a right hand which Cena ducked as he bounced off the opposing ropes and nailed HBK with a Flying Shoulder Block on the rebound. HBK got back up to his feet to receive a big Spinebuster to a VERY slow two count by Bischoff. Cena picked HBK up and whipped him off the ropes but Michaels nailed Cena with a Flying Forearm attack. Shawn Michaels sprung back up to his feet and began to fire up the crowd. Shawn Michaels went to pick Cena up but Cena rolled him up with a Small Package to another VERY slow two count by Bischoff. Shawn Michaels gave Cena a few boots to keep him down then brought him over to the corner where HBK drove the air out of Cena with a few shoulder thrusts to the midsection. Shawn Michaels whipped Cena into the opposing corner so hard he bounced right out. Cena went for a Clothesline on Michaels but HBK ducked it and hit a Back Drop for a quick two count. Shawn Michaels locked John Cena in the Figure Four Leglock where Cena screamed in agony but refused to tap. Bischoff yelled to Cena to tap over and over but Cena kept crawling towards the ropes. Bischoff put his foot on the bottom rope and pushed it out of Cena’s reach. With Cena not being able to reach the ropes he rolled over and reversed the pressure on HBK forcing him to break the hold. Cena ended up firing off some right hands on HBK gaining momentum. Cena hooked Shawn Michaels up for a Stalling Vertical Suplex and in mid-air gave the “You Can’t See Me” sign to Bischoff before dropping. John Cena pumped up his shoes and climbed to the top rope. HBK climbed to his feet and received a Missile Dropkick for third VERY slow two count. Cena began yelling in Bischoff’s face but HBK jumped Cena from behind. Cena got slammed down on the mat before HBK climbed to the top rope. HBK nailed Cena with the Flying Elbow Drop for only a two count. Shawn Michaels began tuning up the band for the Sweet Chin Music. Cena ducked the Kick and set HBK up for the F-U. Michaels slipped out the back door and nailed Cena with the Sweet Chin Music! Unfortunately they were so close to the ropes that it knocked Cena out of the ring threw the middle rope. HBK climbed out of the ring and threw Cena into the steel ring post. Shawn Michaels took Cena’s Heavyweight Title and blatantly clocked him over the head with it right in front of Bischoff who refused to call for the disqualification. Michaels rolled Cena back into the ring and covered him for a very close two count, but not quite enough to make three. Shawn Michaels climbed up to the top rope and awaited for Cena to get up. Bischoff began yelling in Cena’s face as he tried to make it to his feet. HBK went for a Flying Moonsault but Cena dodged it and HBK nailed Bischoff with it! Shawn Michaels looks at Bischoff, confused at what he had done then turned around to see Cena giving the “You Can’t See Me” Sign and hitting HBK with the F-U. Cena covered Shawn Michaels until none other than Eric Bischoff’s employer Vince McMahon ran down the aisle sliding into the ring and counting the three. Cena celebrated as confetti fell from the ceiling. RAW will now be Bischoffless! Bischoff is gone from RAW forever! All thanks to the swerve of Vince McMahon himself!

Winner: John Cena

Overall Rating: 87

Crowd Rating: 92

Match Rating: 77

Show Rating: 84

RAW Preview:

Word From John Cena and Vince McMahon on the NEW RAW General Manager!

First Meeting between John Cena and Triple H Ever!

Chris Jericho vs. Eugene

Kurt Angle vs. Danny Basham

Word From CM Punk On Unforgiven

Main Event: Shawn Michaels vs. Big Show

Also On The Card: CM Punk, Tyson Tomko, Kerwin White, Shelton Benjamin, Viscera and more!

Also, because Tristan Kancer was the only one to actually make predictions, You can PM me or e-mail me at alittledisturbed@earthlink.net whenever ya get the chance to tell me who you want any title to change hands to (Y)

Edited August 28, 2005 by Inner D Monz

[The End]

Before I PM you with my answer, I wanna comment on this. First off, I think it's bad that I won with only 3 right answers. More people should read and comment, as well as vote because this is a pretty good booked diary. There are a few things I'd change but ya know. Okay, here we go on the ppv.

John Cena vs Shawn Michaels: It was really the only way you could have possibly went, which is what I'd call booking yourself into a hole. The answer was really predictable. The swerve with McMahon was out of nowhere, which could be a good thing or a bad thing. That will be decided on Raw where we get an explanation.

Shawn Michaels interview: It was good, and belieavable even though it kind of made HBK seem like he was doubting himself. Unless that's the gimmick you're looking for then you need to make him more cocky. He just seemed like he was questioning whether or not he could do it. Not the HBK we all know.

Matt Hardy vs Edge: Nice win for Hardy. Twist of Fate through the table was nice as well. It was definately needed in order to keep Hardy from looking like a bitch.

John Cena Interview: Seems like both men are in agreeance about the match not being personal, which pretty much guarentee's it ends after this match here. Typical Cena comments, and a pretty good interview on it's own.

Triple H vs Big Show: Well, I guess since there was really only one way to go with this match it kind of made sense to use WWE's "Biggest" jobber and it keeps Kane from being made a bitch like I thought he would. Triple H winning had to be done, the man doesn't lose his return match.

sXe/Austin confrontation: The first thing I saw that there was no possible way I could have agreed with it. Bringing Punk in only to have him be Austin's bitch was just not the way to go. Austin can't wrestle, Punk can. The best way would have been for Austin to attempt to kick his ass only to be blindsided and taken out. Would have made Punk credible. Now to me he's lost any credibility he might have had.

Shelton Benjamin vs Kurt Angle: As I said when I made the predictions, Angle didn't need this win but if it serves to set up another fued then I guess it could work. Kerwin and Benjamin should be able to put on pretty good matches but I'm not sure how much of a story you're able to put behind them. JR knowing something about it seems a bit odd but we'll have to wait to find out.

Carlito vs Eugene: I was praying for Carlito to win and thank god he did. Eugene's gimmick is old, as well as branding a perfectly good wrestler under a ridiculous gimmick. Of course if you change the gimmick, the only way to go would be turning him heel and going back to Nick Dinsmore. I know a perfect way to do it if you were thinking of going that way, give me a pm and I'll let ya in on it. Plus, Carlito, now that's cool.

Dupree vs Basham: I hope you have something planned for Basham, otherwise you've jobbed out a talented wrestler to someone who doesn't have much outside of the tag ranks. Plus the face winning just kind of threw me since Dupree loses some heat from this.

Ashley vs Lita Well, there was a swerve involved but I guess it didn't go in the same direction I figured it would. Lita/Ashley together doesn't make a lot of sense unless you bring Trish back as a face. Then her and Christy could fued with Lita and Ashley.

Overall you're doing a pretty good job of capturing some challengers and such, just watch that you don't fall into the same trap as WWE does and start underutilizing talent. PM coming soon.

[I Don't Mind]

RAW:

Date: September 19, 2005

Cena’s Decision!

Vince McMahon’s music hits to start off RAW. The chairman of the WWE struts down the aisle and climbs into the ring, taking a microphone from Lillian Garcia who introduced him.

Vince: “Ladies and gentlemen last night I know I turned a lot of heads. I know I dropped a lot of jaws but I did it all… in the interest of fairness. I didn’t have a rhyme or reason to get Eric Bischoff kicked off of RAW. I was the one who brought him here in the first place! However, Eric Bischoff did make the foolish mistake of making his wager with John Cena, putting his job on the line. Let’s bring out the winner of that match right now! Ladies and gentlemen! The WWE Champion! John! Cena!”

John Cena’s music hits as the crowd stands on their feet. Cena walks down the aisle, belt around his shoulder, throwing the double horns in the air. Cena climbs into the ring and takes a microphone from the ring crew.

Cena: “I got to be honest with you all. There was a part of me that wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to stand here and say this ever again. But… THE CHAMP! IS! HERE!”

The crowd pops for Cena still having his job.

Cena: “And most importantly Eric Bischoff is not! You’re boy, John Cena won last night! He beat Shawn Michaels! He came up against all odds! Mr. McMahon, thank you for your support last night. My regards and blessings to you and your family.”

Vince: “Whoa, whoa, whoa, John. I didn’t come out here just to be your ring announcer. I mean you’re great but you’re not great enough to have me be your personal ring announcer. I didn’t come out here just for the honor to say your name, I came out here because I, like all these fans want to know… who is our new RAW general manager?”

Cena: “Vinny Mac, dog, I hate to say it but… well no actually I don’t hate to say it. YOU CAN’T SEE ME! And you won’t be able to see the new general manager till next week. I contacted them and next week, I will personally come down to the ring and introduce them.”

Vince: “Oh come on John. You can’t just tell me? I mean come on, I am Vince McMahon. I think I deserve to know a little bit more than all these fans.”

Cena: “Sorry Vince but here on RAW we believe in keeping secrets to keep them surprises. Why? Because this ... is what ... we do! And you don’t come before any one person in my Chain Gang! We’re here to represent! And next week, I’m counting on my Chain Gang to raise the roof for their new General Manager, who’s a personal long time friend of mine. Frankly Vince you know them very well, but I won’t get into it.”

Vince: “Damnit Cena I’m not screwing around! Tell me who the new General Manager is next week or else!”

Cena: “Or else? Vince, a few months ago I delivered the F-U to one Bitch in the middle of the ring. If you want to be the second one I deliver it to… come get some!”

Cena drops his microphone and exit’s the ring throwing up the double horns as he leaves leaving Vince in bewilderment.

Overall Rating: 86

::Fade To Commercial::

Kerwin White vs. Viscera

A clear mismatch of styles. The World’s Largest Love Machine Viscera threw Kerwin around a lot and even managed to humiliate him at points too by sodimizing him. White would fight back with cheap shots behind the referee’s back. After an astonishing Spinning Heel Kick from Viscera, Kerwin began begging the referee to call Viscera off. Viscera grabbed Kerwin from behind but Kerwin scored with a kick between the legs, out of the referee’s site. Shelton Benjamin dashes down the aisle and slides into the ring. Benjamin tackles Kerwin and pounds away at him with right hands as the referee calls for the bell. Viscera lifts Benjamin up off of Kerwin with little ease and throws him down. Viscera yells at Benjamin then turns around and delivers a big Splash to Kerwin. Benjamin and Viscera shake hands then leave together.

Winner: Kerwin White via DQ

Overall Rating: 68

Crowd Rating: 67

Match Rating: 70

A New Mentor

Ashley Massaro and Lita are backstage together hanging out with Edge in the interview area. Edge has his arm around Lita who’s leaning against him and putting a hand on his chest. Ashley is sitting beside them on a crate with one leg dangling off and the other one bent on the crate.

Grisham: “Ashley Massaro, Lita, last night you two were supposed to face off against each other one on one with Christy Hemme as special guest referee. What caused you two to put your differences aside and team up to commit the heinous beat down you laid on Christy?”

Lita: “Ha! Christy? That little skank had it coming. Christy’s not one of us. Christy’s a preppy little always-happy tramp! I hate her guts! She makes me so sick she’s always so happy. Here’s an idea Christy, SWITCH TO DECAF!”

Ashley: “Being my predecessor to the RAW Diva Search, I knew that she was my only real competition. Lita and Edge have taken me under their wing to teach me how things run around here. You have to connive before the other connivers and deceive before the other deceivers. But you have to admit Josh, I played these idiot fans like pawns on a chess set. The happy, spunky Ashley Massaro was all an act to get me a contract into the World Wrestling Entertainment. Welcome to the new Ashley Massaro. A new vicious Ashley Massaro.”

Overall Rating: 68

::Fade To Commercial::

SXE Fails. Or Does It?

CM Punk along with Vicki Adams comes down to the ring to their music. They climb into the ring and CM Punk snatches the microphone away from Lillian Garcia after she’s done announcing his name.

Punk: “Last night, in a lot of people’s eyes, CM Punk failed to deliver. In some people’s eyes, CM Punk couldn’t get the job done! Well the people who think these things are utter idiots! Their fools! Their borderline retarded! I may have gotten a Stone Cold Stunner, and so did Vicki but in our eyes and all the eyes of Straight Edgers around the world, it was a small price to pay. We were martyred in the eyes of our Straight Edgers. We may have each taken a Stunner, but not before busting Stone Cold wide open.”

CM Punk and Vicki start to laugh at their diabolical deed.

Punk: “We didn’t leave that night without his blood on my hands! And there was plenty to go around believe me. I could have bathed in his blood. It was a great feeling. I may have taken a Stunner, but damnit I know I got the last laugh knowing that night Austin was lying in a hospital bed getting stitched up! And with every stitch put in his head, I hope he cursed my name. I hope he yelled and screamed and cursed DAMN YOU CM PUNK! DAMN YOU STRAIGHT EDGERS! I…”

CM Punk is cut off by the music of Problem Solver Tyson Tomko. Tomko comes out on stage with a microphone in hand.

Tomko: “CM Punk, I have to be honest with you. Stone Cold has been a hero of mine for over a decade and I’m not going to stand in the back and listen to you tirade on and on about him! These people here seem to not like you CM, they seem to think you’re a huge problem here on RAW. And who better to shut your mouth then the Problem Solver, Tyson Tomko!”

Tomko sets his mic down and charges the ring. Vicki Adams exit’s the ring as CM Punk motions Tomko to bring it.

Overall Rating: 69

CM Punk w/Vicki Adams vs. Tyson Tomko

Punk brought a wide variety of moves and submissions to the match but Tomko powered out of a lot of them. After a Reverse Hurricanrana, CM Punk locked Tomko in the Texas Cloverleaf but Tomko wasn’t in it long as he threw Punk off with just his leg strength. The end came when Tomko lifted CM Punk up for a Press Slam, but Punk slipped out the back and locked in the Crossface Chickenwing. Tomko lifted Punk right off his feet and began swinging him around like a rag doll. Punk went flying off of Tomko and right into the referee. Punk then turned around right into the Chainsaw Kick. Tomko covered Punk but the referee was still down. Vicki Adams then slid into the ring and scored with a kick between the legs on Tomko. Punk got back up and hit the Devil’s Lock DDT for the three count. As CM Punk is named the victor, Vicki Adams pulls a can of spray paint out of her pocket. Punk smiles at her and holds Tomko down, facedown on the mat. Vicki Adams spray paints SXE on Tomko’s back before the two leave.

Winner: CM Punk

Overall Rating: 74

Crowd Rating: 70

Match Rating: 79

::Fade To Commercial::

Kurt Angle vs. Danny Basham

Angle showed a mean streak tonight taking it to Basham pretty good with German Suplexes and Belly-To-Belly’s. Basham did manage to get in a fair share of offense though through his brawling and old school moves. Angle went for the Angle Slam but Basham slipped out the back and kicked Angle in the gut as he turned around. Rene Dupree jumped the barricade and as Angle reversed an Irish whip, Dupree caught Basham by the foot. Basham reached over the ropes but Dupree dodged his grab. Angle then hit the Angle Slam and locked in the Angle Lock to which Basham quickly tapped out. Rene Dupree climbs into the ring and starts stomping away at Danny Basham as Angle exit’s the ring. Dupree hit’s the French Tickler as Angle stops at the bottom of the ramp and watches. Angle ignores Dupree’s beating on Basham and keeps walking up the ramp. Dupree exit’s the ring and snatches an American Flag from a fan, sliding back into the ring and covering Basham with it. Dupree spits upon the flag and begins stomping on it and Basham. Angle sees this action and stops his tracks. Angle dashed down the aisle and slid into the ring, taking down Dupree with several right hands. Angle nails Dupree with the Angle Slam then locks him in the Angle Lock. A swarm of referees run down and try and pull Angle off of Dupree as Dupree taps out rapidly. Finally Angle releases the hold under his own will and walks backstage.

Winner: Kurt Angle

Overall Rating: 84

Crowd Rating: 86

Match Rating: 80

True Patriot

Kurt Angle is caught backstage by Maria who has a microphone.

Maria: “Kurt Angle, how do you explain your attack on Rene Dupree after he helped you win your match? Are you now all about America, just like Danny Basham, or are you just anti-Germany.”

Angle: “Anti-Germany? What are you a fricken idiot? Dupree’s from Canada! He’s French Canadian! And Dupree helping me? I don’t need any help Maria, never did, never will. I’m an Olympic gold medallist for Christ’s sake! And I won my gold medal with a broken freakin' neck! Third of all, just like Danny Basham? Let me tell you something Maria, I was waving around the American flag while Basham was still in diapers! I snapped Rene Dupree’s ankle not because he was attacking Danny Basham, but because he disrespected America by spitting and stomping on our flag! Anyone that walks through those curtains and I catch them disrespecting my country… I’ll break their fricken ankle too! Just like that! Oh it’s true! It’s damn true!”

Overall Rating: 89

::Fade To Commercial::

Chris Jericho vs. Eugene Dinsmore

A great technical match with lots of counters between the two. Y2J was very cocky in his beating on Eugene. Eugene managed to humiliate Jericho by locking him in his own Walls Of Jericho, but Y2J managed to reach the ropes. Midmatch, Eugene began to hulk up and really take it to Jericho, firing off rights and lefts. The momentum was switched though when after Eugene threw Jericho to the outside, and Jericho then pulled Eugene out under the bottom rope and threw him into the barricade. Back in the ring at the end, Jericho managed to hit the Bulldog followed by the Lionsault for the three count. Before Jericho left, he slapped Eugene around a little bit and yelled profanities in his face.

Winner: Chris Jericho

Overall Rating: 91

Crowd Rating: 86

Match Rating: 96

Unmitigated Retribution

Matt Hardy arrives at the arena a little late tonight. He pulls his bags out of the trunk of his rental car but as he closes the trunk he gets jumped from behind by Edge. Edge slams Hardy face first into the car several times then leaves the scene. After Hardy catches his breath and stands back up to his full posture, Edge then Spears Hardy into the car. Edge then opens the trunk and throws him in, closing it and locking it up tight. Lita then comes over and the two begin making out.

Edge: “Matt, this all started because I got your girl to cheat on you with me. Now before that event took place we both know that you and I were good friends. A lot of people ask me how could a friend do this to someone? It seems like the lowest thing anyone could ever do to anyone else. Well Matt tonight I’m going to top that. Because tonight, Lita and I are going to take this car into a dark alley and with you locked in the trunk you get to hear every filthy, dirty, whorish thing I get your former girl to yell when we do it.”

Edge and Lita laugh then make out some more before climbing into the car and peeling off.

Overall Rating: 88

Shawn Michaels vs. Big Show

A good match between the two with Shawn Michaels playing the cowardly heel. Big Show would continually throw Michaels to the outside then chase after him only for HBK to slide into the ring and ambush Big Show as he followed. Show no-sold a lot of HBK’s moves, especially his flying Forearms and even his Flying Elbow Drop from the top rope. Michaels did get a bit of a pop though as Big Show lifted him up for the Show Stopper, Michaels threw his legs around Big Show’s back, wrapping it around his other arm and rolling Big Show backwards with an old school Crucifix Pin for a two count. After Big Show missed a big Clothesline, he turned back around right into the Sweet Chin Music for the big three.

Winner: Shawn Michaels

Overall Rating: 87

Crowd Rating: 90

Match Rating: 83

::Fade To Commercial::

HHH Meets Cena

John Cena’s music hits to a great acclaim. Cena struts down to the ring with his Heavyweight Title and takes a microphone from ringside before pacing back and forth. Triple H’s music hits next to a lot of heat. Triple H struts down to the ring in his street clothes without Ric Flair tonight watching his back. The Game climbs up onto the apron and dramatically sprays his water into the crowd before entering through the ropes. The two go nose to nose talking some inaudible trash. Triple H takes a few steps back and shoots Cena a boastful grin.

Triple H: “John Cena. WWE’s hottest new thing. Undoubtedly the future of this industry. Meet the present of the industry. I’m the best there is today John and that is a fact, jack! They call me Triple H, they call me The Game, they call me the ten time Heavyweight Champion! And they call me these things for a reason, because I am! Because I have worked my ass off to get where I am now! I was winning titles when you’re little “Throwbacks” was a high school graduation hat and gown. I was kicking ass and taking names while u were fighting acne pal! You Cena… will never… ever… be half of the man that I am.”

John Cena: “Triple H. Boy this has been a long time coming. This is the ultimate showdown. The Game and The New Franchise, locking horns for the grandest prize in this business! A title I hold. Not you. Me! If you’re the present Triple H, and I’m only the future of this industry, then why do I hold the title that says I’M the best around?”

Triple H: “That’s a good question John. But for every question there is an answer, and being The Game, I have that answer. You are still the WWE Heavyweight Champion, because I have allowed it. Because I have yet to face you for it. When we go at it John, you will be staring up at the ceiling hearing the zebra in the ring strike the mat three times, and that damn title will be coming home with the best there is today… because I am, that, DAMN! GOOD!”

John Cena: “Hunter, I think you should take your game board in the back and re-write the rules because The Champ Is Here! And he’s staying here for a very, very, long time. Because this ... is what ... we do.”

Triple H: “John, you just don’t get it. When we do face off, one on one, it will be catastrophic. We’ll tear the roof off of the place. We’ll destroy everyone and everything that gets in our paths. And only then John will you see what happens when the proud take on The Game. Your Cockiness will be your downfall John. And that’s the only opening I’ll need. I’ll find that weakness, I’ll capitalize… and I’ll walk out the ELEVEN TIME! HEAVYWEIGHT! CHAMPION! OF THE! WORLD!”

John Cena: “Alright Kid! I’m tired of this nonsense! When we fight it is going to be big man! It’s gonna be huge! No doubt about it! But you’ll walk out Eleven Time champion over my dead body. The only thing that’ll be proven after our match, or fight, or whatever it’s gonna be, is going to be… that You Can’t See Me!”

Triple H: “Cena, don’t humor me. I’m not one of your stupid little Chain Gang morons. I’m going to kick your ass so bad, your “homies” on the street are going to feel it. And if you ever and I mean ever get in my face again like the little snot-nosed kid I know you are… I will mop the floor with you.”

John Cena: “Oh is that so? Well Hunter…”

Cena took off his hat, then his belt and his jersey before very dramatically getting in Triple H’s face.

John Cena: “If you want some… COME! GET! SOME!”

Triple H went to strike Cena, but Cena blocked it and fired off a right hand of his own. The two exchanged right hands until a few referees slid into the ring. The referees began holding the two apart but Triple H floored one with a right hand and just threw the other referee clear out of the ring. Cena shoved one referee down and knocked the other down with a Clothesline. Triple H and Cena clashed again in the center of the ring until many more referees entered the ring and tried to separate the two. Cena and Triple H annihilated each referee one by one. After the two completely destroyed all those who wished to separate them, they had completely forgotten about one another. They each bent down to pick up the WWE Heavyweight Title but found themselves in a bit of a tug-a-war. Finally Triple H released it and got in Cena’s face looking rather irate and intense, while Cena looked very statue-esq. Cena slowly rose the WWE Title above his head and into the air as the camera faded out.

Overall Rating: 90

Show Rating: 82

Smackdown Preview:

Batista and The Undertaker vs. Eddie Guerrero and Randy Orton

Christian vs. Rey Mysterio

Paul Mitchell and William Regal vs. Chair Swinging Freaks

Nunzio vs. Juventud - Cruiserweight Title

Also On The Card: Simon Dean, Booker T, JBL, Orlando Jordan, Chris Benoit and more!

[I Don't Mind]

Smackdown:

Date: September 22, 2005

Main Event Stipulation

Theodore Long is shown backstage in his office to a loud ovation.

Long: “Holla, holla, holla Smackdown! Tonight playas, two feuds will be put together in a match like no other. “Legend Killer” Randy Orton will team up with “Latino Heat” Eddie Guerrero to take on “The Dead Man” The Undertaker and “The Animal” in what is sure to be a hell of a main event, now believe dat! Now, because I know how bad these four guys want to get at each other, I know things are going to get a little rowdy and out of control! So to make sure order is maintained, I, myself, will be the special guest referee, now believe dat playas!”

Overall Rating: 87

Nunzio w/Big Vito vs. Juventud w/Super Crazy and Psychosis - Cruiserweight Title

A superb technical match that can only be compared to Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit at Royal Rumble a few years back. Lots of mat wrestling and counters by these two who kept things for the most part grounded. Vito and the Mexicools on the outside of the ring, didn’t play too much of a difference in this match as opposed to the other matches with their partners wrestling. Juvi tried to keep things in his advantage, working on the ribs of Nunzio, but Juvi made the mistake of putting the mat-wrestling on pause to go up top. This cost Juvi big time as Nunzio leaped up to the top rope with Juvi and brought him back down to the mat with a Single-Arm DDT for the three count. Vito took the Cruiserweight Title from the referee and entered the ring, wrapping it around Nunzio’s waist. The two celebrated for a moment before MNM ran down the aisle and attacked the two from behind. Once Mercury discovered the way to floor Vito was to kick him in the crotch, MNM focused on working over the smaller of the two, Nunzio. Nunzio was laid out with the Snap Shot, followed by a Snap Shot to Vito.

Winner: Nunzio

Overall Rating: 83

Crowd Rating: 67

Match Rating: 100

::Fade To Commercial::

Love Struck?

Johnny Nitro and Joey Mercury are walking around backstage in the hallways with arrogant smirks on their faces, clearly proud of what they did.

Nitro: “We totally kicked those two Italians’ asses man!”

Mercury: “As if there was any doubt we ever could. And we did it without our “Fixer’s” help!”

Nitro: “Totally man, totally, who needs her anyways? We can kick Vito and Nunzio’s asses any time, anywhere, any…”

Nitro is cut off by getting jumped from behind by Vito while Mercury is ambushed by Nunzio. Mercury is thrown face first into the concrete wall several times as Nitro is dragged across the concession table, being choked by Vito. Finally Jillian Hall runs over and tries to pull Vito off of him which she clearly can’t do on her own might but Vito relinquishes his choke and after a stare down between Vito and Jillian Hall, Vito takes Nunzio and leaves.

Overall Rating: 68

Fresh Blood On Smackdown!

A video is played on the Titan-Tron of a completely dark room with lit candles lined up against the walls. Johnny Jeter wearing all black baggy pants and a baggy Anarchist shirt steps onto the scene.

Jeter: “Change. It’s what keeps life interesting. It’s what separates the boring and mundane - the normal, from excitement! Well I’m anything but normal. My name is Aleister Dante, and I’m here to change the scene of World Wrestling Entertainment forever. I’m sick and tired of all these pretty-boy prima donnas running around, in their tight little spandex briefs, flexing their steroid-driven muscles and trying to woo the ladies. Things are going to get very dark, very soon for WWE, I’ll make sure of it. To be honest I’m jaded of this colorful world Vince McMahon has created. I think things are better left off bleak, black and white, but mostly black! So I’ll be coming around that mountain soon Smackdown, and when I do, I’ll be painting you black! So says, Aleister Dante.”

Overall Rating: 69

Latino Heat and Legend Killer

The team of Eddie Guerrero and Randy Orton are backstage in the interview area with Josh Matthews.

Matthews: “Randy Orton and Eddie Guerrero, tonight you face two of your biggest rivals. Randy Orton you faced half of your tag team opponents, I.E. The Undertaker, at WrestleMania and again at SummerSlam, and Batista and you have been going at it for some time now. Eddie you’ve been getting in Batista’s face left and right, is that just about taking the World Heavyweight Title? Or does it go deeper then that?”

Guerrero: “Josh, homes, let me tell you something ese. Me taking the World Heavyweight Title, and becoming a two time WWE Champion ese, that’s just a bonus. Truth be told ese vato, Batista disrespected me homes! He tried to extinguish my Latino Heat! Well no one can extinguish my Latino Heat Josh, so the first chance I get, I’m going to tear Batista apart, and I’m going to take that World Heavyweight Title!”

Orton: “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold onto your horses their Eddie. As I see it, I beat The Undertaker at SummerSlam, and that makes me the number one contender. Hell, you lost to Rey Mysterio like fifty times before you finally beat him! So how the hell does that get you a title shot? Batista and I, we go way back. Back on RAW when him and I were in Evolution together, I sat back and observed him from afar, and only I know how to bring The Animal down! I beat the Undertaker, and Batista’s next. I’ll be the next World Heavyweight Champion Eddie, you just sit back and take notes, so you can get a look at greatness!”

Guerrero: “Yeah homes, you beat The Undertaker. I know you beat The Undertaker, because you haven’t shut up about it since! But you also lost to Batista homes, to refresh your memory. It was Latino Heat, Eddie Guerrero that left Batista down in a puddle of his own blood two weeks ago, and beat The Undertaker just last week! So as I see it, you just stay out of my way tonight in our tag match and we’ll get along just fine Orton!”

Teddy Long steps out on the scene before a fight can break out between the two.

Long: “Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Break it up you two! Now knock it off! Show some sophistication playas! This is Smackdown! Now there seems to be a little disagreement between who the number one contender is. So I’ll tell you what, the winner of the fall tonight, will be crowned the number one contender and will face off against Batista at No Mercy, so believe dat playas!”

Orton and Guerrero smirk and nod at the clause of tonight’s tag match.

Long: “Now you two get to steppin, you’ve got a tag team match to prepare for!”

Overall Rating: 85

::Fade To Commercial::

Mitchell and Regal (Paul Mitchell and William Regal) vs. Chair Swinging Freaks

Mitchell and Regal worked over the extreme brawlers, the Chair Swinging Freaks in this one. They put all of their technical prowess to work, wearing down the appendages of their challengers. Towards the end, Regal tagged in Mitchell and let him do all the work. Mitchell single-handedly demolished both of the Chair Swinging Freaks, using them as spot monkeys for his stiff maneuvers. Several times throughout the match, the camera cut to the New Road Warriors backstage watching the match intently with their Tag Team Titles. The end came when Mitchell rocked Axl Rotten’s noggin with a Big Boot, then laid out Brad Mahoney with a Pump Handled Sidewalk Slam. Mitchell got back up and hit Axl Rotten with a Standing Shooting Star Press which got a big pop for the three count. Regal entered the ring feeling very refreshed and patted Mitchell on the back.

Winners: Mitchell and Regal

Overall Rating: 70

Crowd Rating: 59

Match Rating: 81

Riding In Style

JBL and Orlando Jordan are seen on the Titan-Tron from inside of a limo wearing their finest attire, laughing as they sip on Champaign.

JBL: “Hello peasants! John Bradshaw Layfield and Chief Of Staff Orlando Jordan here from… well hell! A hell of a long way from where all you losers are! See, John Bradshaw Layfield is no idiot. I know how angry Chris Benoit probably is after I beat the snot out of him last week. I know the Rabid Wolverine is a dangerous man when provoked and thus it’s only smart of me to not be anywhere near. Now I know a lot of you people are probably calling me a coward right now, but what do you know? I mean honestly, you people can’t pay for a decent education, unlike Orlando and I, who went to private schools all our life and received the finest teachings in the country!”

Orlando: “The absolute finest!”

JBL: “Chris Benoit is a putz! He’s a nobody in my eyes! He’s a great athlete I’ll give him that, and he’s got a physique like Tarzan, but when compared to the Wrestling God, JBL, He wrestles like Jane!”

Orlando: “He wrestles like a woman compared to this man!”

JBL: “Driver, I’ve had enough of these idiot fans, who would rather cheer for that toothless imbecile Chris Benoit, than chant the three most valuable letters in their life - J-B-L! J-B-L! J-B-L! Take me to the clubs driver, Orlando and I would like to celebrate our wit.”

The glass screen separating the driver from the passengers in the back slides down as the driver turns around, revealing himself as Chris Benoit. Benoit throws his chauffeur hat at JBL and starts laughing.

Benoit: “RIGHT AWAY MR. LAYFIELD!”

The camera inside the limo goes back to JBL and Orlando who are now clinching at their seats as the sound of the limousine peeling off is heard, then going to static.

Overall Rating: 85

Christian vs. Rey Mysterio

Much to the crowd’s disappointment Mysterio kept things pretty mat-based as opposed to his high flying antics. The two still dished out some pretty quick offense on one another, which included Christian bringing out his old arsenal of Crossbody Blocks, and a Tornado Reverse DDT. Mysterio got some pops when he hit his Sunset Flip Powerbomb, and his Wheelbarrel Bulldog, which each scored a two count, but other then that Mysterio used a lot of technical holds to keep the match at a slow pace. The biggest pop of the match came when Mysterio low-bridged Christian and then nailed him with a Running Somersault Pescado. With Mysterio in control over Christian, Mysterio hit the West Coast Pop out of nowhere on Christian who was clearly right by the ropes, and thus the crowd was shocked as the wholesome Rey Mysterio wrapped his arm around the middle rope for leverage as the referee counted the three. The bell rang as the referee raised Mysterio’s hand in victory, but the referee was then shoved down my Mysterio and dropkicked in the face. Mysterio rolled out of the ring and shoved the time keeper out of his chair, taking the ring bell. Rey Mysterio slid back into the ring with the ring bell and clocked Christian in the back of the head with it, flooring him. Rey then continued to slam the bell into the back of Christian’s head until he was busted open before leaving.

Winner: Rey Mysterio

Overall Rating: 88

Crowd Rating: 87

Match Rating: 89

::Fade To Commercial::

Not Clear Enough Yet?

Rey Mysterio is walking around backstage riving with frustration. He passes by Booker T and Sharmell who begin patting him on the back and embracing him.

Booker: “Yo man, you totally whipped Christian’s punk ass like it was butter man! You laid a beating on him that can only be compared to one laid by the…”

Sharmell: “BY THE FIVE TIME! FIVE TIME! FIVE TIME! FIVE TIME! FIVE TIME CHAMP BABY!”

Booker: “You damn Skippy Hippy! Now I know you can dig that! SUCKA!!”

Rey: “Yeah, yeah, I can dig it just fine Booker. Thanks man. Good to see I get some love around here.”

Booker and Sharmell go to walk away but as they get just a foot in front of Mysterio, Rey kicked Booker between the legs and slams his head into a fire extinguisher case, busting it open. Rey pulls out the fire extinguisher and slams it into the fallen Booker T’s head repeatedly while Sharmell looks on and screams in terror.

Rey: “It’s too bad it’s not about the love anymore Booker! I loved Dominic! And where did it get me!? I don’t give a rats ass about the love anymore Booker! So you can take your love for me, AND SHOVE IT!”

Overall Rating: 87

Batista and The Undertaker vs. Eddie Guerrero and Randy Orton - Theodore Long as Special Guest Referee

Eddie and Orton started this one off strong, both working over the World Heavyweight Champion Batista. The two seemed reluctant to tag as did Batista and The Undertaker who are both basically loners. When Undertaker got the hot tag all hell broke lose and neither Eddie or Orton wanted to be in the ring, making frequent tags to one another once they received a little damage. Batista and The Undertaker manhandled their opponents midmatch but the tide began to favor their opponents after a low blow and some blatant choke holds. Eddie nailed the Frog Splash on the fallen Batista in the middle of the ring while at the same time Randy Orton was hit with a Superplex by The Undertaker. Unfortunately for Taker as he hit the Superplex on Orton, Orton’s arm draped over the fallen Batista’s body, causing a double pin by Orton and Guerrero for the three count. Long raised both Eddie and Orton’s hands in victory but an argument soon broke out between the two. Shoves were exchanged until Long grabbed a microphone.

Winners: Eddie Guerrero and Randy Orton

Overall Rating: 92

Crowd Rating: 93

Match Rating: 91

No Mercy Main Event

Long: “Hold on, hold on, hold on now playas. I know I may have been a little rash to make the stipulation that whoever makes the pinfall gets the title shot seeing as how you both had the cover on Batista, so here’s what I’ll do. At No Mercy, Batista will defend his title against… Eddie Guerrero! And Randy Orton! In a triple threat match! Now believe dat!”

Just as Long finished speaking, Batista and The Undertaker attacked Orton and Eddie, knocking them both to the outside. Batista and Undertaker demolished Orton and Eddie all the way up the ramp way while Long yelled at all of them to cease and desist. With no one but Long in the ring the crowd went berzerk as someone jumped the barricade and slid into the ring. Standing behind Theodore Long was none other then recently fired RAW General Manager, Eric Bischoff! Long turned around and received a right hand to knock him on his ass. Bischoff mounted and pummeled on Long until he got back up and gave him a few stiff Martial Arts Kicks. Bischoff tore off his business suit to reveal a RAW T-Shirt, which he then took off to reveal a Smackdown T-Shirt.

Overall: 83

Show Rating: 80

Velocity Preview:

Doug Basham vs. Sylvain Greiner

Super Crazy vs. Hardcore Holly

New Road Warriors vs. Steven Richards and Simon Dean - Tag Team Titles

[craig]

i like the debut of Bischoff of Smackdown, and i am very intrigued on to who Cena names GM of RAW, i think it would be quite good if he names himself GM, would seem a very John Cena thing to do