CZW - To The Top of the Wrestling World

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

August 9, 2005

Kendo Kashin over Chris Ca$h

I bet you guys can see where this one is going before I even get done typing the match synopsis. Ca$h spent most of the time cheating before Nate Webb hobbled out to ringside on crutches, selling the attack to his ankle from last week. And the moment the ref had his back turned, Webb broke one of the crutches over Ca$h's head, leading to the upset victory for Kashin. Afterwards, Webb choked Ca$h with his other crutch before getting pulled off by various refs and security.

We cut to backstage where a grinning Ruckus walks into the office of the new Authority of CZW, Nick Mondo.

"Yo dawg, it's great to have you back. Remember the old days when you and me used to tear shit up around here? You know I helped save you last week, right bro? So how about helping a nigga out and cancelling that tag match, for the sake of B-Boy, right?"

"Yeah, I do remember the days where you and I were flying around this here arena like bats out of hell. But that doesn't change the fact that what you and B-Boy have been doing to Mike Quackenbush the past couple weeks is bull! So, no, I'm not just going to cancel an advertised match that the fans paid to see, even if your partner isn't here. You're lucky I don't put you in a Handicap match tonight! But I have found a suitable replacement for B-Boy but I won't tell you who. Tonight will be a Double Mystery Partner Tag Match and I suggest you get your ass out of my office and out to that ring because it's up next!"

"What the...? Man, screw you. You're lucky you're retired or else I'd punk yo' ass!"

We go to commercial and when we come back, Ruckus is stomping to the ring, waiting for his Mystery Partner. Some familiar music hits and out comes Jack Evans, a man that Ruckus kicked out of the Blackout after Cage of Death 6. Evans extends his hand as a peace offering and Ruckus just gives him a weak five. Next comes Mike Quackenbush, who takes a mike after getting into the ring.

"It's a shame B-Boy couldn't be here tonight but I couldn't let you guys miss a surprise like this. I've known my partner for a long time. We've wrestled up and down this coast together for years, whether it be on the same team or against each other. He's not quite so young by now and he's not very reckless anymore but he is one hell of a wrestler. So Tom Carter...come on down!"

The crowd gives a decent pop for the former Reckless Youth, Tom Carter, as he slaps hands with the fans on the way to the ring. Eric Gargiulo gives a brief rundown of these two men's history together as part of the Black T-Shirt Squad before the match goes underway.

Black T-Shirt Squad (Mike Quackenbush and Tom Carter) over Ruckus and Jack Evans

Despite not wanting to work together, Ruckus and Evans actually gelled together well as a team. But that still couldn't compare to the years that Quack and Carter spent wrestling each other and knowing each other like brothers. Ruckus and Evans had Quack stranded on the top turnbuckle and looked to be going for a Spanish Fly or something but Carter ran into the ring and shoved Evans off the top to the outside and followed him out. Meanwhile, Quack took care of Ruckus with a Super Facebuster and got the pin for a small measure of revenge. The Black T-Shirt Squad played to the crowd while Ruckus and Evans bickered their way to the back.

Cut to Nick Mondo's office where we see Wifebeater, Nate Hatred, Nick Gage and Justice Pain all in the same room without coming to blows. Well...almost. The hatred is so thick that they're practically going into convulsions to prevent a brawl, especially since Mondo is standing between them all.

"I know you're wondering why I called you all in here. No, it's not to get this all worked out between you four. In fact, I would love to see you all beat the hell out of each other...and that's exactly what will happen tonight. In our main event, it will be Nate Hatred vs Wifebeater vs Nick Gage vs Justice Pain in an Ultraviolent 4-Way match. But the catch is that a spot in the Tournament of Death is on the line. I've talked this over with Zandig and we've decided that having all four of you in the Tournament of Death is too dangerous, even for CZW. That's why only one of you will go on to TOD in two weeks. The other three will have to wait until next year. Now I suggest all four of you get ready for your match."

I'm sure that decision didn't do much to ease the tension as all four men storm out with clenched fists. I'd be surprised if the match didn't start right outside the door.

Kaos over Rico

It seems like we have two running themes in CZW television lately - Nate Webb and Chris Ca$h are costing each other matches and guys like Rico, Kaos, Christian York and Nicho are having killer matches. This one isn't an exception. But if you figured that Kaos could only win this one by cheating, well then...you'd be right. Feet on the ropes here. Maybe if Eddy had accompanied Rico out to the ring, that would've been averted. Oh well. Anyways, Christian York runs out after the match and gives Kaos a receipt for the attack from last week.

Meanwhile, back in Mondo's office, Chris Hero steps inside.

"Yeah, you wanted to see me?"

"I just wanted to thank you for saving me from being attacked by Messiah and his goon squad last week and I wanted to give you something in return - a rematch against Messiah for the CZW World title! Better yet, it's going to be in two weeks at the Tournament of Death in an I Quit match. I'm giving you free reign to do whatever you want to him. Anything goes until one of you gives up."

"So, I can do whatever I want?"

"Uh-huh."

"But he can do whatever he wants to me? At the Tournament of Death?"

"Yeah...I guess so."

"I don't know what you take me for but I'm not some 'extreme' spot-monkey, no offense. I'm a WRESTLER. I'm not about to get my back torn up by barbed wire or take some stupid light-tube shots."

"But I figured you'd want to get your hands on Messiah no matter what. So I take it you won't accept the match?"

"Of course I'll take the title shot. What do you think I am, stupid?"

Chris Hero walks out of the office while Mondo is left at his desk, dumbfounded by what just happened.

Ultraviolent 4-Way For A Spot In The Tournament of Death

Wifebeater over Justice Pain, Nick Gage and Nate Hatred

The match was littered with sick spots including fan-made weapons, tables and sick light-tube shots that I'm surprised made it on TV. Pain and Beater paired off while Nate Hatred worked over his former tag partner, Nick Gage, namely working over the hand he slammed in a car trunk last week. At one point, Pain had Beater pinned but Gage broke it up, showing that a spot in TOD was more important than their bond as a tag team and as brothers. That's heels for ya. Finally, Beater ended by giving Pain a Chokenstein off the apron and through a barbed wire table on the outside. Pretty good for a random beatdown match.

Final Thoughts: Decent show this time out, but not great. The crowd didn't take to Tom Carter's debut but I'm sure him and Quack will show them all what's up. This Ca$h/Webb feud had promise but is going nowhere fast. Mondo's making an impact as the Authority, even though it seemed like he was in every other segment. At least Tournament of Death is getting a decent build right off the bat, especially with the World title match.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For August 10, 2005 - Fake You! TV Preview, New TOD Entrants!

-Next week's episode of Fake You! TV will play host to the following matches:

Jonny Storm vs Adam Flash

Gene Snitsky vs CKNY - Handicap Match

Chris Ca$h vs Nate Webb

Mike Quackenbush vs Tom Carter

S.B.S. vs Mexico's Most Wanted - CZW Tag Team Championship Match

-Due to the result of the main event last night, Wifebeater has been granted the first spot in the Tournament of Death. Nate Hatred, Nick Gage and Justice Pain are now unable to enter due to the stipulations of the match. But Nick Mondo has decided to announce the next two entrants. First of all, Mondo has forced Adam Flash to enter as a punishment of sorts for being a part of the attack on Mondo a few weeks back. Second, Sexxxy Eddy has decided to throw his hat into the ring, despite urgings against it from his "mentor" Rico. Stay tuned to CZWrestling.com for more details on the Tournament of Death, coming August 21!

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

August 16, 2005

Jonny Storm over Adam Flash by DQ

A DQ you say? In CZW? That's right. Flash ruined a perfectly fine match by bringing a chair into the mix. While the initial chair shot didn't get him disqualified due to the lax rules in CZw, something snapped inside Flash's brain and he went apeshit on Storm to the point where the ref had to pry the chair out of his hands and call for the bell. Flash questioned the ref's call, as did most of the crowd, but all he did was flip him off and walk to the back. I guess Flash got wrapped up in the moment, considering he's entered in the Tournament of Death on Sunday.

Backstage, we see Angel sitting on a bench in the locker room with his face buried in his hands. His "partner" RF slides next to him and wraps an arm around him, asking what's the matter. Angel's crying because he's just been entered into the TOD! RF brings up a good point saying that Angel's been in deathmatch tournaments before, almost winning one even! But Angel then shoots that down saying that they weren't like TOD. Angel continues to cry on RF's shoulder as we go to commercial.

Handicap Match

Gene Snitsky over CKNY (Cory Kastle and Niles Young)

Can you say "squash", children? I knew you could. I'm not Green Lantern Fan so I didn't keep a stopwatch at my side but if this match reached 5 minutes, I'd be shocked. Snitsky finished it off with a Double Chokeslam. Meh.

Cut to backstage again where Chris Hero arrives at the New Alhambra. Hero is...WALKING! There, I said it. Happy?

Tom Carter over Mike Quackenbush

This match was billed as a "wrestling clinic" and "friendly competition" by Gargiulo, which was pretty much proven when Carter and Quack shook hands before locking up. Best wrestled match of the night by far but didn't get much heat compared to what happens later on. Of course, as with all decent matches in CZW as of late, something has to go wrong. And that something was Ruckus, as he sauntered down to ringside and distracted Quack enough for Carter to get the pin. Carter, realizing that he won because of Ruckus and not because of being the better man in a great match, jumped out of the ring and chased Ruckus to the back.

Backstage, Nate Webb is stretching out and preparing for his match with Chris Ca$h when, speak of the devil, Ca$h runs in and attacks Webb, working over the tender ankle that he Pillmanized weeks back. Ca$h yells there won't be a match tonight and runs off, leaving Webb clutching at his ankle and calling for help.

Wifebeater comes out to the ring to cut a promo. Hey, watch the F-Bombs. It's a family show. Wait, no it isn't, so F-Bombs away! Yeah, I didn't bother transcripting it. But he did put over the fact that he's won two out of the three Tournament of Deaths that CZW put on and he's bound and determined to win his third. Of course, his promo didn't go very far as The New H8 Club came out from the crowd and put a beatin' on Beater. Luckily for Beater, Nate Hatred ran out from the back and chased off Pain and Gage.

CZW Tag Team Championship Match

S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur) © over Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween) to retain

Great match with tons of heat. Again, MMW had the better of S.B.S. and were bound and determined to take the belts and finish their feud with S.B.S. before Tournament of Death. But you won't believe how they squeaked out with the win. Super Dragon had Damien 666 down on the mat so he went up to the top for his world famous Double Stomp to the head. Only Damien rolled out of the way and when Dragon came down, it looked like he snapped his ankle as he rolled to the outside clutching it. Excalibur had the ref look at Dragon's ankle and the ref decided throw up the dreaded X sign to bring out the paramedics. But once the medics came out, Excalibur grabbed the belts, gave one to Dragon and they both walked to the back like nothing happened. Dragon never snapped his ankle and didn't even pretend like it hurt as he walked to the back. You better believe that got a huge "Bullshit!" chant.

CZW World Champion The Messiah came out to the ring to hype up his title defense against Chris Hero in an I Quit match at the Tournament of Death. Messiah says that Hero has every reason to be afraid because TOD is his domain and he'll do anything (and I'm sure he means anything) to retain his belt. Of course, that brought out Chris Hero and the two started to brawl. It spilled out to ringside where Hero picked up Messiah and went for the Godsmack, only spinning him into the ring post (ala Brock F5ing Cena in the ringpost). Messiah went down clutching his knee, which brought out the UVDS. Hero escaped through the crowd and the damage was done.

Final Thoughts: Decent build-up for TOD. The actual Tournament wasn't super-built up, especially considering that there's still 4 more spots open, but the Beater promo did it's job. I'm more psyched for the World title match than the Tournament, if you ask me. Great match between Carter and Quack that ended too soon. And it's official, Super Dragon and Excalibur are the biggest dicks in wrestling! How many different ways have they screwed MMW out of the belts? 32? It's entertaining and makes me want to see MMW win it even more.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For August 19, 2005 - Final TOD4 Spots Filled, TOD4 Matches Set, Minor Rule Changes.

-The Authority of CZW, Nick Mondo, has signed the following wrestlers to take part in Tournament of Death 4 this Sunday:

A close personal friend of Mondo's - Horace The Psychopath!

A man crazy enough to piss off New Jack - "Vicious" Vic Grimes!

Winner of last year's IWA Mid-South King of the Deathmatch Tournament - Corporal Robinson!

Runner-up of last year's Tournament of Death - Necro Butcher!

-With the final spots filled, the opening tournament matches will look like this:

Corporal Robinson vs Adam Flash

Vic Grimes vs Angel

Horace The Psychopath vs Sexxxy Eddy

Necro Butcher vs Wifebeater

-There has been some uproar due to the DQ decision in the match between Adam Flash and Jonny Storm last week on Fake You! TV. It has been decided that, due to the exposure on TV leading to more matches and a weekly schedule for the wrestlers, most matches will be contested under standard rules. Although the rules will still be a little more lenient than in matches seen on WWE or TNA, a wrestler will be disqualified due to excessive violence when it isn't called for, such as Flash repeatedly beating on Storm with a chair for no reason. Of course, deathmatches, ladder matches and other such matches where a clear finish must be made will not have to worry about such rules. We feel that this is a good compromise that will give our die-hard fans the type of action they've come to appreciate yet ensure the safety of our talent.

-In other Fake You! TV news, we have extended our contract with WWN for another nine months!

-This week's match of the week is the CZW Tag Title match between S.B.S. and Mexico's Most Wanted and is available for download in the Multimedia section of the site.

CZW Tournament of Death 4

August 21, 2005

Opening Round:

Corporal Robinson vs Adam Flash

Vic Grimes vs Angel

Horace The Psychopath vs Sexxxy Eddy

Necro Butcher vs Wifebeater

Semi-Final Round:

Winner of Robinson/Flash vs Winner of Grimes/Angel

Winner of Horace/Eddy vs Winner of Necro/Beater

Final Round:

Winner of Semi-Final 1 vs Winner of Semi-Final 2

CZW World Championship Match

Anything Goes Until Someone Gives Up

The Messiah © vs Chris Hero

Edited December 31, 2005 by TheRyno

[TheRyno]

CZW Tournament of Death 4 Live Report

August 21, 2005

Before the tournament started, Authority Nick Mondo came out with the CZW Iron Man belt over his shoulder. He cut a promo talking about how it was good to be back at the Tournament of Death with the Iron Man title again, but it wasn't for him. As everyone knows, B-Boy is in rehab right now and Mondo has had no choice but to strip him of the Iron Man title and declare it vacant. But he'll be in the back watching the entire show through the curtain and the actions that go down tonight in the Tournament of Death will give him an idea of what to do with the vacant Iron Man championship.

Before I go on with the report, the rules for TOD have changed a little bit. Instead of having a special gimmick every match, the opening round matches are just your average hardcore brawls with weapon use and all that good stuff. The special gimmicks won't come into play until the Semi-Final and Final Rounds.

Opening Round Match

Adam Flash over Corporal Robinson to advance to the Semi-Finals

With Corp being the winner of IWA-MS's Deathmatch tournament, people not only expected him to be a favorite but to completely beat the crap out of Adam Flash. He did get a lot of damage in on Flash but it was all for naught as Flash's UVDS crony Gene Snitsky came out and helped Flash beat down Corp. And since this was a deathmatch where anything goes, Snitsky couldn't be ejected. It finally came to an end where Flash brought out a table wrapped in barbed wire and Snitsky powerbombed Corp over the ropes and through the table on the outside, where Flash got the pin. The people booed Flash unmercilessly for taking the cheap victory.

Opening Round Match

"Vicious" Vic Grimes over Angel to advance to the Semi-Finals

Angel looked pretty scared out there since RF decided to take the night off, possibly to chat up 14 year olds on the net. But when Grimes came out, Angel kinda perked up since he was so glad to face off against a "bear" like Grimes. Of course, Angel had no chance. Grimes spent a lot of the match carving up Angel's forehead with a pizza cutter before finishing it off with a somersault senton from the top rope.

Opening Round Match

Sexxxy Eddy over Horace The Psychopath to advance to the Semi-Finals

Pretty good match that showcased Horace to the CZW crowd as I believe this is his first time wrestling for them. Mondo picked a good brawler that I can see having a bright future in CZW. Of course, he wasn't going past Sexxxy Eddy, as Eddy was bound and determined to make an impact this year after having to forfeit in last year's tournament due to blood loss. Horace missed a top rope senton and hit a pile of lighttubes which led to Eddy hitting the Stupidsault (moonsault with a trashcan over the head) for the win. Afterwards, both men shook hands.

Opening Round Match

Necro Butcher over Wifebeater to advance to the Semi-Finals

Great premise to this match as this is a rematch of the final round of last year's TOD. Now they're facing off again to see who will continue on and who will go home. This match definately had a different outcome as last year as Justice Pain ran out and attacked Wifebeater with a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire behind Necro's back. Necro ended up getting the pin but Nate Hatred ran out and attacked Pain. When Necro realized he got the tainted win, he helped Hatred in his attack, sending Pain running off scared. Necro, Hatred and Beater all stood in the ring afterwards and Necro held up Beater's hand, despite losing his chance to win his third Tournament of Death.

Semi-Final Four Corners of Glass Match

Sexxxy Eddy over Adam Flash to advance to the Finals

Flash got the upperhand early on by sending Eddy through the first pane of glass with a Death Valley Driver. Flash got cocky and laid Eddy on the second pane but when Flash ran across the ring with a spear, Eddy moved out of the way, sending Flash crashing through the glass. Flash got revenge by putting Eddy underneath a pane of glass and breaking the glass with a steel chair. But it was Eddy who put Flash through the last pane by laying it in the corner across the second rope and while Flash laid across it, Eddy put Flash through it with the Total Sextacy (springboard reverse SSP) which led to the pinfall victory.

Semi-Final Lighttube Log Cabin Match

Necro Butcher over Vic Grimes to advance to the Finals

STIFF! Necro and Grimes spent most of the match potatoing each other punches that made Vader vs Cactus Jack seem tame in comparison. Grimes surprisingly had Necro down enough that he sat Necro in a chair and went up top for another somersault senton. But Necro came to his senses and threw the chair he was sitting on straight at Grimes' head, causing him to lose his balance and plummet to his doom through the Lighttube Log Cabin at ringside. The bell was rung soon after and Necro was awarded the victory.

CZW World Championship Match

Anything Goes Until Someone Says "I Quit"

The Messiah © over Chris Hero to retain

For a match taking place at the Tournament of Death, you'd be surprised to see some actual wrestling in it. This match was wrestled pretty well and not a weapon was used at all. Hero dictated the pace and figured that submissions would be better to make someone quit instead of just bludgeoning someone with a weapon. Hero cravate-snap-mared Messiah into the corner and went for a top rope maneuver but Messiah rolled to the outside, letting Hero crash to the mat. As Messiah was at ringside, he reached in to grab Hero's legs and wrapped them around the ringpost, hooking Hero into a Figure Four leglock! Messiah had that hold on Hero for a good couple minutes but Hero didn't dare quit. Suddenly, Messiah let go so he could grab a chair from under the ring that he used to bash Hero's knee into the ringpost with. Messiah went back to the Figure Four but Hero still didn't quit. Again, Messiah broke the hold and reached under the ring for a few lighttubes, which he broke over Hero's knee! Messiah hooked the Figure Four back on and Hero had no choice but to quit. As Messiah walked to the back with his World title, Hero remained lying in the ring to the point where the ref had to call out members of security to help Hero to the back, who was limping and unable to make it on his own.

Tournament of Death Final Match

No Rope Barbed Wire Match

Necro Butcher over Sexxxy Eddy to WIN Tournament of Death 4!

The crowd was definately divided as to who they thought should win. People wanted Necro to win as many thought he should've won last year, yet people wanted Eddy to win since he didn't get that chance last year. Eventually, the majority of people sided with Eddy since Necro's stiff shots were too much for the smaller Eddy to take, instantly making him the underdog. But with Eddy taking sick blows to the head and stomach by the hands of Necro, coupled with being thrown like a ragdoll in the barbed wire ropes, he didn't have a chance but to pass out when Necro applied the Asiatic Spike. Afterwards, when Necro was handed the Tournament of Death trophy, Necro picked up Eddy and helped him come to his senses before lifting him up on his shoulders.

Final Thoughts: Of course, you don't come to a deathmatch tournament expecting to see good wrestling, but it wasn't as bad as in year's past. I'm sure a lot of the blood-crazy fans are pissed about changing the opening matches to regular hardcore matches but I don't mind. Otherwise, by the time you get to the final round, it's overkill. Hero and Messiah put on a good wrestling match despite the violence (and the ending) and the final matches were better than your average mindless deathmatches.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For August 22, 2005 - Hero Suffers Injury At TOD4, Fake You! TV Reminder.

-Unfortunately, Chris Hero suffered a serious injury at the hands of The Messiah last night at Tournament of Death 4. The Figure Four around the ring post, coupled with the chair and lighttube shots, caused him to tear his calf. Paramedics took a look at him after the I Quit match and he was promptly taken to the hospital by ambulance, where he underwent further tests. The doctor's word is that Hero will be out of wrestling for about nine months. CZW Management would like to send our condolences to Chris Hero and wish him a speedy recovery.

-Reminder to our WWN audience that tomorrow night's Fake You! TV will be a recap of Tournament of Death 4. But as a preview for next week, we have booked the match between Chris Ca$h and Nate Webb that did not take place last week due to Ca$h's attack on Webb.

-In other news, we have released Ultra Mantis Black from the CZW roster. We wish him well for the future.

Edited December 31, 2005 by TheRyno

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

August 30, 2005

Tom Carter over Kendo Kashin

While both of these guys are known for aerial acrobatics, Carter and Kashin kept it low on the ground and wrestled a mat classic. Unfortunately, wrestling a great hold-for-hold battle in front of most CZW fans is like taking PETA to a KFC factory. Well, not quite that bad but the crowd still didn't get behind it, sadly. Carter's years of experience over Kashin led to a submission victory via the Stretch Plum.

Backstage, Rico is sitting in the locker room when he is approached by Rick Feinberg.

"Hey Rico, what's up? You know, I was thinking maybe later tonight you and..."

"No."

"What?"

"I know what you're gonna ask and the answer's no. I'm sick of all you people thinking I'm gay."

"Whoah! Wait a minute! Did you think I was asking you out? Psssht, whatever. Anyways, what I was asking you is that Angel wants a match with you tonight. But you do seem a little repressed. Maybe I oughta take you to a bathhouse sometime and..."

"You know what? Send that little freak of yours out to the ring so I can kick his ass. And afterwards, I'll kick your ass too!"

"I'd definately kiss you."

Rico gets pissed and storms out of the room while RF makes the "call me" signal with his hands as we go to commercial.

Nate Webb over Chris Ca$h

Much of the match was spent with Ca$h working over Webb's ankle with stomps and wear-down holds. But Ca$h made the mistake of going for another Pillmanizing double-stomp from the top as Webb was able to lift his leg and kick the chair into Ca$h's face on the way down. Webb took the chair and limped up to the top for a Chairsault and the win. But as Webb was celebrating, Ca$h came to and beat down Webb with a flurry of chair shots before leaving the ring. Webb may have gotten a measure of redemption but Ca$h won't let this feud be over as long as Webb is walking.

We cut to a brief pre-taped promo by Christian York where he talks about being antagonized by Kaos for the past couple months. All the cheap shots and all the attacks behind his back just proved that York is still better than Kaos. So York is makes a challenge to Kaos for Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression in less than two weeks to see who is the best once and for all.

Gene Snitsky over El Generico

Another squash. Generico made the mistake of starting out with a crossbody from the top rope as Snitsky caught him, lifted him up in a military press and dropped his stomach down across his knee. The crowd actually ate up all 30 seconds of the action, though.

This seems like an old episode of ECW TV as we cut to another pre-taped promo, this time by Wifebeater and Nate Hatred. Beater is pissed that he got screwed out of the Tournament of Death by Justice Pain. But they want to end this feud and end it violently. So they extend a challenge to The New H8 Club for an Ultraviolent Tag Team match on September 11.

Rico over Angel

Rico had most of this match in the bag. RF got sick of Angel getting beat on so much that he had to jump on the apron to distract Rico. When Rico got in his face, RF grabbed his head and went for a kiss! But Rico could sense Angel bouncing off the ropes and getting ready to attack so Rico ducked out of the way. But instead of Angel crashing into Rico, they stopped and kissed! Rico got disgusted so he gave Angel a roundhouse kick to the back of the head which sent RF flying off the apron. With Angel dazed, Rico hit him with a belly-to-back suplex for the win. Afterwards, RF slid back into the ring and started peppering Rico with weak shots. While it wasn't meant to hurt Rico, it was enough for Angel to get back up and take a chair from ringside. As he wound back to hit Rico, Sexxxy Eddy ran out (wrapped up pretty good due to the many wounds he suffered at Tournament of Death) and attacked Angel. Rico and Eddy teamed up to throw Angel and RF out of the ring and kept playing to the crowd until the ad break.

After the commercials, CZW World Champion The Messiah came out with the belt still draped over his shoulder but without his UVDS backup. Messiah takes the mike but takes a few minutes to start due to the immense booing from the crowd.

"As you can see, I didn't come out with the Death Squad tonight, just like I didn't need them to defeat Chris Hero at the Tournament of Death. I faced the best wrestler CZW had to offer and beat him single-handedly! I am still the CZW World Champion and I am the TRUE SAVIOR OF CZW!! And I'm sure all of you are out there boo-hooing that I put him out for nine months. But if it were up to me, I would've taken out both of his legs. So be thankful that your god is not a vengeful god! But I've already forgotten about that worthless Hero. This one goes out to Nick Mondo! I know you're back there so listen to me. If you had any sense, you would take this belt, retire it and make a shrine to me in the CZW Hall of Fame because there is no one in Heaven or in Hell and definately no one here on Earth that can take this belt away from me! It doesn't matter who you put in front of me. You've seen what I've done with Hero. Believe me when I can say I can do a lot worse."

With that, Messiah throws the mike to the timekeeper and walks to the back holding the CZW World title high while the crowd hurls garbage and obscenities in his direction.

Final Thoughts: The main event interview comes to CZW! I'm joking as it was actually good and put Messiah over big as the top asshole heel in the company, as he should be. Right now, only the S.B.S. come close in assholiness. Decent show this time out. While Rico vs Angel wasn't the best wrestled match, it got the most heat. And they're doing a good job building toward UVFoE especially since they only have one more show left to do it.

CZWrestling.com Press Release for September 1, 2005 - Fake You! TV Preview, UVFoE Update, New Contracts Signed!

-Matches signed for next week's episode of Fake You! TV include:

Nick Berk vs Horace The Psychopath

Black T-Shirt Squad (Mike Quackenbush and Tom Carter) vs El Generico and a Mystery Partner

Sexxxy Eddy vs Kaos

-Also, Nick Mondo has a plan on deciding who will face The Messiah for the CZW World title at Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression!

-Speaking of Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression, the challenges put forth last night by Christian York, Wifebeater and Nate Hatred have been accepted by Kaos and The New H8 Club, respectively.

-Based on their performances at the Tournament of Death, we have signed Horace The Psychopatch and Vic Grimes to exclusive Written contracts. Unfortunately, we have decided that our deal with Corporal Robinson was only a one-time deal. Also, Necro Butcher has been working in Japan lately and, though we will still use him, we will not be able to use him as much as we'd like.

-We have also parted ways with Claudio Castagnoli, who has been unhappy in CZW as of late. We wish him the best in his future endeavors.

-Don't forget to visit CZWrestling.com's Multimedia section to watch the Match of the Week - Rico vs Angel.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

September 6, 2005

Horace The Psychopath over Nick Berk

Berk's Angle-esque offense was mainly no-sold by the much larger Horace. With Horace perched on the top rope, Berk ran up and went for the top rope slam but was merely pushed off by Horace, who retaliated with a sweet senton-bomb from the top rope for the win. Not bad but not great either. But at least Horace can go in non-hardcore matches too, which is nice.

After the match, El Generico comes out and takes the mike.

"Ole! Ole ole oleoleole, ole ole. OLE!"

Apparently that's Spanish for "Here's my mystery opponent!" as he points to the entryway where "Hangin' Tough" by New Kids On The Block plays and Beef Wellington comes out! Beef gets a decent Beef chant as they prepare for their match against the Black T-Shirt Squad after the ad break.

Black T-Shirt Squad over Beef Wellington and El Generico

Pretty much a glorified squash as Beef and Generico got little offense in. At one point, Carter hooked both Beef and Generico into some weird Indian Deathlock/STF combo at the same time which forced both men to tap out. Afterwards, Quack joined Carter to celebrate but out came Ruckus with a steel chair that he used to clock Quack over the head with. Carter took the chair away from Ruckus and chased him all the way to the back with it before sliding back into the ring to check on his partner.

Backstage, we see Nick Mondo in his office with a number roller on his desk. He says that he put every person on the CZW roster into the hopper and he's going to pull out four names, who will face off in an Elimination Match in tonight's main event. The prize? A CZW World title shot against Messiah this Sunday! The first name he pulls out is Rico. #2 is Tournament of Death participant Vic Grimes. #3 is La Familia De Tijuana member L.A. Par-K. Last but not least is...Messiah's own bodyguard, Gene Snitsky!

Kaos over Sexxxy Eddy

Great match as Eddy has been showing he can go with most anybody on the roster as of late. Rico must be teaching him well. Of course, since this is a Kaos match, you can probably tell that Eddy is gonna get screwed. Eddy had Kaos down in the corner and went for the Total Sextacy but Kaos slid out of the way as he came down and immediately rolled him up with a schoolboy and hooking the ...um...tights, if you wanna call them that, for good measure. As Kaos celebrated, out came Christian York to attack him and have the fight go all the way to the back.

Backstage, we see a brawl already in progress between Nate Hatred, Wifebeater and The New H8 Club. Nick Gage is paired with Hatred, who takes a chair to the head and gets speared through a propped-up table for his troubles. Beater is brawling with Justice Pain up the stairs that lead to the Eagle's Nest. But with Hatred out of the picture, Gage is able to set up another table before joining the fray. Beater can't take both Pain and Gage so he gets overmatched, leading to both men picking Beater up for a double powerbomb off the balcony and through the table! Security swarms on Beater's limp body while The New H8 Club laugh at the destruction they've caused.

4-Way Elimination Match For #1 Contendership To The CZW World Title

Vic Grimes over Rico, L.A. Par-K and Gene Snitsky

A surprisingly good match with surprising results. After a few minutes of brawling, Rico, who was picked as the favorite, was actually the first one eliminated after a few too many chair shots from Snitsky. I'm sure Snitsky eliminated Rico on Messiah's orders seeing as he's probably the biggest threat to the World title in this match. But after Snitsky eliminated Rico, Par-K took Snitsky's chair out of his hands and started pummelling him with it, bringing back the old days as WCW's Chairman. But Par-K got too preoccupied with Snitsky as he didn't see Grimes come up behind him and pick him up for the Victimizer (Styles Clash) for the elimination. It was down to the two behemoths, Snitsky and Grimes, as they stared each other down before breaking down into a brawl. Snitsky picked up the chair to gain the upperhand and swung it but Grimes ducked and kicked it back into Snitsky's face. Snitsky looked to be out so Grimes unfolded the chair and sat Snitsky down before climbing up the top rope and delivering the somersault senton that he wanted to hit Necro Butcher with at the Tournament of Death. The weight of Grimes completely flattened the chair Snitsky was sitting in, so you'd have to imagine the wind would be knocked out of him if his intestines weren't liquified first. Of course, that was enough for Grimes to get the pinfall victory and be named the #1 Contender to the CZW World title.

As Grimes celebrated, out came the CZW World Champion himself, The Messiah. Before berating his bodyguard a bit, he grabbed a mike from the ring announcer and stepped into the ring face to face with "Vicious" Vic Grimes.

"I'm sure all of my fans here in the Arena would like to see me verbally berate you, but I've come out here to congratulate you. You've gotten past my bodyguard in very convincing fashion. You've only been in CZW for a few weeks and you're already the #1 Contender! We've wrestled a few times, on the same side and on opposing sides, so I've already known you've had this in you. But I have to remind you, we're not in So-Cal anymore! We're not wrestling for a scumbag who doesn't know wrestling...well, actually we are but that's not the point. The point is that times have changed and I'm the CZW World Champion. I'm not the same guy I was a few years ago. So it's gonna take a lot more than sitting on me with your fat ass if you want to walk out with MY belt!"

With Messiah's words irritating him, Grimes tries to take the mike away but Messiah snatches it away and gets out of the ring. Grimes is left in the ring staring at his new opponent, who is helping Snitsky to his feet and walking to the back. But before he goes behind the curtain, Messiah raises the CZW World title high and stares back at Grimes as the show ends.

Final Thoughts: I kinda have mixed feelings about this show. The last two matches were great but not much got solved here. So, we have only three matches booked for an event that's taking place in five days? They better get some good matches on that card, STAT! At least they did a pretty good build-up for Messiah vs Grimes in the limited time they've had to work with.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For September 7, 2005 - New Matches Added To UVFoE, Card Finalized.

-Due to the limited time to build matches between Tournament of Death and Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression, CZW Authority Nick Mondo has wracked his brain trying to come up with new matches to fill out the rest of the card. He has come up with two new matches that he's sure the fans will come out to see.

-The first new match will be for the vacated Iron Man Championship. After stripping B-Boy of the title due to his stay in rehab, Mondo sat in the back and watched the Tournament of Death trying to find the best way to find the man most deserving of wearing the Iron Man title. And he decided that at Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression, Tournament of Death Champion Necro Butcher and runner-up Sexxxy Eddy will face off in a rematch. This time, instead of winning a trophy, the winner will be crowned the new Iron Man Champion!

-The second new match pertains to the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship. Mondo has booked an odd, yet intriguing, match as he has booked La Familia De Tijuana stablemates Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K to go at it in a #1 Contender's Match. Better yet, the winner of that match will face Jr. Heavyweight Champion Ruckus later on in the night for the belt itself! But one has to wonder how Mike Quackenbush feels as he definately wants to get his hands on the man who stole his belt and has repeatedly attacked him week after week.

CZW Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression

Live At The New Alhambra Arena

September 11, 2005

Christian York vs Kaos

Ultraviolent Tag Team Match

Nate Hatred and Wifebeater vs The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage)

CZW Iron Man Championship Match

Necro Butcher vs Sexxxy Eddy

#1 Contenders Match For The CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship

Nicho El Milionario vs L.A. Par-K

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Ruckus © vs Winner of Nicho/Par-K

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © vs "Vicious" Vic Grimes

-And don't forget to download the Match of the Week - The 4-Way Elimination Match that crowned Vic Grimes the #1 Contender to the CZW World title!

[TheRyno]

CZW Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression

Live Report From The New Alhambra Arena

September 11, 2005

Horace The Psychopath over Chris Ca$h

Pretty good for a dark match but I can understand why it was relegated to opening the card since this is about Part 504 in an ongoing series of Ca$h and Nate Webb costing each other matches. Webb came out and clocked Ca$h with a chair (again) and laid it on top of Ca$h so Horace could bounce off the ropes and hit him with a somersault senton for the win. I hope they go somewhere with the Ca$h/Webb feud because it's starting to get old.

Christian York over Kaos by DQ

I was surprised that two of the guys who consistantly put in the best matches every night were put first on the card, but as you'll read later, I was pleasantly surprised. By all means, they put on a great match but for once, it wasn't the best match of the night. A lot of that had to do with the ending where Kaos pulled some brass knucks out of his trunks and clocked York in the head. That's not what caused the DQ though. With York down, the ref tried to put Kaos in a corner but he broke out and hopped on top of York and added some more punches, enough to bust him open. The ref had no choice but to call for the bell and ended up pulling Kaos off of the bloodied York. The ref had to call out some medics to check on York while Kaos walked to the back, raising his bloody knucks for all to see.

After they helped York to the back and got things cleaned up, out came the CZW Tag Team Champions, S.B.S. Excalibur proceeded to cut a promo about how it wouldn't be a great CZW show if the S.B.S. didn't wrestle. So they wanted to defend the belts against a team who made a "huge impact" last week on Fake You! TV. The crowd popped, expecting to see the Black T-Shirt Squad come out. But those hopes were dashed when Excalibur yelled "Beef and Generico, come on down!" Yup, the crowd pretty much poo-pooed on that one.

CZW Tag Team Championship Match

S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur) © over Beef and Generico to retain

For being perennial jobbers, Beef and Generico actually helped make the match enjoyable. Of course, most of the crowd still didn't take but I liked it. Of course it was a squash but B&G made the beatdown look good. Dragon put Generico out with a Psycho Driver but Excalibur told Dragon to ease off so he could get the pin. Afterwards, Beef ran in to avenge his partner and got lifted up for a Psycho Driver as well but out came Mexico's Most Wanted for the save. S.B.S. bolted out of the ring and grabbed their belts while MMW checked on the fallen challengers.

Ultraviolent Tag Team Match

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) over Nate Hatred and Wifebeater

Basically, the "ultraviolent" match is really your run of the mill hardcore match. With the recent cutback in over-the-top violence and the fact that the Pennsylvania State Athletic Committee wouldn't allow half the stuff these guys do anyway really limited it. But despite that, the fans really got behind it. I guess this feud caters to the base instinct of four burly guys beating the fuck outta each other, which is pretty much what they did. The attack on last week's Fake You! really served to soften Wifebeater up as they did the same thing they did then, only powerbombing him from the ring through a table on the outside instead of off a balcony, to get the win.

CZW Iron Man Championship Match

Sexxxy Eddy over Necro Butcher to become the NEW CZW Iron Man Champion!

Right after they got the participants from the last match to the back, they didn't even bother cleaning up the ring as the next match was to crown the new Iron Man Champion! Unfortunately, this one didn't quite live up to expectations as Eddy and Necro basically did the same match they did at Tournament of Death, minus the barbed wire. Only instead of ending the match like they did last time, Eddy came back from the odds and defeated Necro with a chair-aided Total Sextacy. After the match, Necro handed Eddy the belt and raised his hand. Pretty nice ending but I felt the whole match was a bit underwhelming.

#1 Contender's Match

L.A. Par-K over Nicho El Milionario

Great match that started off with both men shaking hands and going move-for-move, resulting in many stalemates. They must've gone about 15 or 20 minutes until Nicho went for the Guillotine Legdrop but Par-K rolled out of the way and hit the sitting Nicho with a short dropkick to the face for the win. Afterwards, Par-K picked up his teammate and both men hugged. That was until Ruckus ran out to the ring and clocked Par-K in the back of the head with the Jr. Heavyweight title. Nicho pushed Ruckus out of the ring, who then took a microphone from the ring announcer and said he wants his title match right now. The refs had no choice but to show Nicho to the back while the next match went underway.

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Ruckus © over L.A. Par-K to retain

Holy shiat! If you would've told me that two overweight "lightweights" could pull off a flawless match, especially after one had just wrestled, I would've laughed in your face. Match of the year candidate right here! At first, Ruckus merely played around with Par-K but Par-K would end up playing possum and gaining the upperhand. In fact, Par-K almost had the match won with the Yoshi Tonic but Ruckus somehow kicked out. This made the fans go wild as they knew this wasn't just going to be some one-off squash and they really didn't know who would win for once. But alas, Ruckus eked it out when he reversed a Par-K crossbody and held onto the tights. After the bell rang, Par-K sat right back up and started to push Ruckus but Ruckus came back with a punch to the jaw that sent Par-K reeling. At that point, Mike Quackenbush came out and ran Ruckus off. With Ruckus gone, Quack stayed in the ring with Par-K and raised his hand, dignifying what a great match the fans had just seen.

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © over "Vicious" Vic Grimes to retain

Messiah seemed to have his work cut out for him as no matter what he did, nothing could phase the deranged Grimes. Messiah would hit him with something and Grimes would just shrug it off until the point where Grimes unleashed so much fury that Messiah couldn't fight back. At that point, Grimes started toying with his victim. In a nod to last week's Fake You! TV where Messiah claimed Grimes would have to do more than sit on him, Grimes dragged Messiah to the corner and delivered a Bonzai Splash ala Yokozuna. Of course, Grimes is nowhere near as big as Yoko but the damage was done nonetheless. At that point, Gene Snitsky ran out with a chair and smacked Grimes in the face with it. Grimes stumbled back but stayed on his feet until Messiah crawled behind him as Snitsky hit him one more time. This time, Grimes tumbled backwards and tripped over the bent over Messiah, who promptly rolled him up for the cheap pin. Messiah didn't have much time to celebrate as Grimes started back up to his feet. Snitsky gave Messiah another chair and they both reared back, connecting with a sick Conchairto to Grimes' skull. Grimes crumpled to his knees as Messiah grabbed his belt and celebrated on his way to the back.

Final Thoughts: Overall, I'd say definately catch this show if you can. Ruckus vs Par-K is a definite MOTYC. Messiah and Grimes had a hard act to follow and, while they didn't top it, they certainly pulled off a worthy World title match. All of the other matches were solid overall. The only real weak point was Eddy vs Necro which wasn't bad, just disappointment. But I'd definately pick this up when Smart Mark Video has it. You never would've thought CZW would pull off a good show like this with only 2 weeks worth of build-up.

CZWresting.com Press Release for September 13, 2005 - Necro Butcher Leaves CZW, Fake You! Preview For Next Week.

-Unfortunately, Necro Butcher's schedule for Japan is so packed that there is no way possible for him to squeeze in any appearances in the States, let alone CZW. We would like to thank Necro Butcher for his previous performances in CZW and would welcome him back for another appearance without a doubt. But we would also like to wish him the best of luck in his extended stay in Japan.

-Tonight's episode of Fake You! TV will be a recap of the events that took place at Ultraviolent Freedom of Expression two days ago. But we already have the card set up for next week's show.

Chris Ca$h vs Beef Wellington

Jonny Storm vs Angel vs Kendo Kashin

Wifebeater vs Justice Pain

Nate Hatred vs Nick Gage in a Hardcore match

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

September 20, 2005

Chris Ca$h over Beef Wellington

Nate Webb didn't interfere in this one? No way! But it's not like Ca$h squeaked away with a clean win here. He pretty much suckered Beef into getting some offense until Beef went up top for the dreaded Ass Punch. But as he came down from the top, Ca$h grabbed the same chair that's played so much into this feud and clocked Beef in the face on the way down to get the quick pin. Afterwards, Ca$h started taking the chair to Beef when Nate Webb came out to stop him from doing any more damage. Webb then grabbed a mike and tried to talk some sense into Ca$h.

"I know what you've been trying to do to me these past few months and I have to say something: You're right. You've been right all along. It took me a while but I know what you're doing. You're trying to save me from becoming a jobber like HIM (Beef). I know how it must hurt for you to come through the CZW Wrestling School and scratch and claw to make a name for yourself only for it to be stolen by a dancing goon like me. But that's over now. The dancing, the poppy entrance music, the pandering to little kids, that's over for me. What I'm saying is that I'm willing to bury the hatchet. I'm sick of being a loser and I want you to show me the path to greatness!"

After the promo, Webb extends his hand to Ca$h, who is pretty confused at this sudden turn. But it was all a setup as that gave Beef enough time to recover and grab the chair that put him out in the first place. Right when Ca$h decided to accept the olive branch, Beef brought the chair down across his back and put him down to the mat. Webb then helped Beef beat down Ca$h to a chorus of cheers before walking to the back together.

Cut to backstage where we see the new CZW Iron Man Champion Sexxxy Eddy walking around the back room until he sees who he was looking for, his mentor Rico.

"Hey Rico. I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate all the help you've given me lately. I did it! I'm the Iron Man Champion and I probably wouldn't have been without your help."

"Wait a second. Even though I don't really agree with all these Iron Man matches or whatever the hell you call them here in CZW and think they're a waste of your talent but I do have to say I'm proud of you. You came out on top over Necro Butcher who, quite frankly, is a homicidal maniac. Not many men can say they've done that. But that belt you have over your shoulder isn't the end of your training. In fact, it's only the beginning. Now come on, we have some work to do."

Kendo Kashin over Jonny Storm and Angel

Decent for a three-way but not great. Angel looked to be in heaven since he had two men in the ring at the same time but he took a beating that him and RF bailed to the back later on, leaving Storm and Kashin to go at it alone. Storm went for the Rewind Hurricanrana and hit it but Kendo rolled through it with a pin of his own and got the surprise victory.

Cut to backstage where Damien 666 and Halloween are hanging out when they're suddenly attacked by the Tag Team Champs, S.B.S. Simple, yet effective.

Justice Pain over Wifebeater

Beater's been coming up on the short end of the stick as of late, evident by this match. Pain spent a lot of time working on the already injured back of Wifebeater but Beater was able to muster enough strength to fight back, almost to the point of coming out on top. Pain blocked a Chokenstein and hit him with the Pain Thriller, making sure to put his feet on the ropes so Beater couldn't kick out. Pain knew Beater was gonna want some revenge so he quickly high-tailed it to the back, leaving Beater in the ring fuming.

Cut to a pre-taped promo from Mike Quackenbush.

"Ruckus, I don't like you but I can't help but respect you. You see, I thought you were just a common street thug trying to make it in the world of wrestling. You go out there and disrespect a sport that I've made my bread and butter from for years! So I bring in my good buddy Tom Carter and make a solemn vow to show you the 'sport' of wrestling, if not beat it into you. And it never worked as, time after time, you'd bend the rules or attack me behind my back. But just when I think you're a lost cause, you go out and have one of the best matches with L.A Par-K that CZW has ever seen. I want to be done with this whole feud but I know it can't be over not just after I beat you, but after I beat you in the best match you've ever had. Then you'll know what it's like to be a wrestler because you've been defeated by the Best...of the Best."

Hardcore Match

Nick Gage over Nate Hatred

This match had to be contested by Hardcore rules because pairing these two former partners in a regular match would get out of hand in no time. And it did get out of hand in no time as they pretty much potatoed each other in the face...repeatedly. Surprisingly, they didn't really go for the weapons as they were content on breaking each other's jaws but eventually it got to the point where they were trading stiff chair shots to see which one would fall down first. And as stiff as they were, neither one did. That was until Justice Pain came out with a bunch of lighttubes taped together and broke them over the back of Nate Hatred's head. Gage went for the pin but Hatred kicked out! So Pain went under the ring and grabbed a couple more lighttubes and tucked them down the back of Hatred's shirt so they stuck out behind his head. Both Gage and Pain grabbed some chairs and hit a sick Con-Chair-To, breaking the lighttubes. That was enough to put Hatred down for the count. But The New H8 Club continued to beat down their fallen foe, that is until Wifebeater ran out with his trusty weedwhacker to clear the ring.

Cut to out in the parking lot, where Vic Grimes is leaning against the building waiting for someone. A door opens and out comes The Messiah, of all people!

"What the hell do you want me out here for?"

"Hey, ease up! I just want to talk things over in a civil manner, that's all. Remember a few years back when you and I used to roll together? You had my back and I had yours. I wanna do that again. I know first hand what you can do in that ring. Hell, I'm still feeling it right now. I'm just gonna lay it out right now. I want you to join the Death Squad. Believe me, you'll have anything you want if you just join up with me."

Messiah extends his hand but Grimes slaps it away.

"You say I can have anything I want? Bullshit! You know what I want is that belt and you only want me to join with you so it doesn't leave your waist!"

"You're gonna regret this. You're lucky I didn't hurt you in the ring a few days ago...just like I'm gonna do now."

Grimes turns to walk away but walks right into a chairshot from Gene Snitsky! Messiah, Snitsky and eventually Adam Flash starts putting the boots to Grimes while The Dew yells at the cameraman to turn the camera off.

Final Thoughts: Not too bad of a show. Gage/Hatred was a great brawl and Beater/Pain was surprisingly good. They're starting to hype up Grimes as a legitimate contender to the World title after practically being drawn out of a hat. And it looks like they're at least doing a little something with the Webb/Ca$h feud by inserting Beef Wellington into the mix. But other than that, nothing progressed or moved on. Where's Christian York and Kaos?

CZWrestling.com Press Release for September 21, 2005 - BIG News For Next Week's Fake You! TV

-After watching last night's episode of Fake You! TV, Nick Mondo has decided that the violence and the bloodshed between Wifebeater, Nate Hatred and The New H8 Club has gone too far. Therefore, he is forcing that both teams face off in a Cage match next week. The stipulation is that the losing team must BREAK UP FOR GOOD! Mondo feels is that the only way this feud will end is if one of the teams is broken up because, if this goes any farther, someone will suffer a severe injury.

-Other matches signed for Fake You! TV next week:

Adam Flash vs Horace The Psychopath

Nate Webb and Beef and Generico vs Chris Ca$h and CZW Tag Team Champions S.B.S.

Christian York vs Tom Carter

"Vicious" Vic Grimes vs Gene Snitsky

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

September 27, 2005

Instead of the usual CZW opening video, we get a pretty sweet music video to the tune of O Fortuna detailing the feud between Nate Hatred and Wifebeater and The New H8 Club. It started with clips from the Cage of Death match that couldn't contain the four men and the eventual double-turn of Justice Pain and Nate Hatred. Clips of every man hitting each other with lighttubes and other weapons play in rapid-fire succession until it briefly ends with a chain-link graphic with the words "ONE TEAM MUST BREAK UP TONIGHT!" in blood red font in front of it.

Chris Ca$h and S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur) over Nate Webb and Beef and Generico

Webb really made a mistake of siding with two jobbers since he pretty much spent a majority of this match fending off not only his rival Chris Ca$h, but the Tag Team Champions as well. S.B.S. used their heel tactics to their advantage to sucker in Beef and Generico only to have the ref divert his attention repeatedly to getting the faces out of the ring while the heels had their way with Webb. Webb went for a huricanrana out of desperation but Ca$h rolled through and held out his hands to his partners for leverage to get the cheap pin. After the three count, all hell broke loose as Beef and Generico jumped back into the ring to start a Pier Six brawl. Not only did security come out to break things up, but Mexico's Most Wanted did as well to get their hands on Super Dragon and Excalibur, who promptly booked it through the crowd.

Adam Flash over Horace The Psychopath

Pretty blah match here. Flash got a cheap win by rolling away from Horace's running senton and then rolling him up with his feet on the ropes. The only thing of interest is Horace going apeshit after the match, throwing chairs at Flash who hightailed it to the back. About time he lived up to the Psychopath part of his name.

Backstage, Sexxxy Eddy is posing in front of a mirror with his coveted Iron Man title when he's interrupted by the voice of Rick Feinberg.

"I don't know what everyone sees in you. You may think you're the sexiest man alive but Angel can go all night long. Believe me, I know from experience, dude. In my eyes, Angel is the true Iron Man in CZW. And I want him to prove it to you with an Iron Man title match!"

"You know something, I'm feeling generous tonight. I'll give Angel a match next week, but it WON'T be for the title! This is my first title here in CZW and I've learned too much from Rico to start handing out title shots like candy. But if Angel can beat me next week, then I'll give him a title shot. Fair enough?"

RF agrees to the terms and extends his hand. But Eddy looks at his hand in disgust, not quite knowing where it's been so he slaps it away and walks off.

Tom Carter over Christian York

Awesome match here! These two guys meshed as well as they did in Maryland feds back in the day. I'll dare say it was as good of a match as Ruckus/Par-K from UVFoE but the fans weren't quite into it like they were that night. Also, the ending was a bust as Kaos came down to the ring with a chair. Carter flipped over the top rope from the apron to catch York in a sunset flip but York held on to the ropes. At least he held on until Kaos clocked him in the face with the chair, causing York to flip over and get pinned. Afterwards, Kaos celebrated by putting one foot on York's chest and raising Carter's hand in victory but Carter knew better than siding with an ass like Kaos and pushed him out of the ring. Carter helped up York while Kaos walked to the back cursing out both men.

Cut to backstage where Mike Quackenbush is watching the great match his best friend just wrestled on a monitor when he is bum rushed by Ruckus. Thug life, yo.

"Vicious" Vic Grimes over Gene Snitsky

This match wasn't half bad considering the barrel of suck that is Gene Snitsky. But the fans are really starting to get behind Grimes, which is a good thing because he actually carried most of this match. After a while, Grimes started to tire which resulted in Snitsky getting the upperhand. After showing his strength by putting Grimes down with a powerbomb, he got cocky and waved to the back. Out came The Messiah with his CZW World title belt and as he slid into the ring, Snitsky picked up Grimes and put his arms behind his back while Messiah reared back with the belt. I'm sure you can guess what happens next. Grimes ducks, Snitsky eats shit, Grimes throws Messiah out and gets the pin on Snitsky. After the bell, Messiah slid back into the ring and pushed Grimes, who retaliated with a punch to the face. That was enough for Messiah to grab his bodyguard and retreat to the back. While the match was enjoyable, it wasn't great due to the fact that the big Cage match is next and they didn't want to overshadow it.

Cage Match

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) over Nate Hatred and Wifebeater

If you came to see these guys in a mat classic, you came to the wrong place. All four men stared each other down for a few moments before completely breaking out into a brutal slugfest. Nothing of note happened for a while (aside from beating the crap out of each other's faces) until Wifebeater made the mistake of climbing to the top of the cage to come down on Nick Gage with...something. We'll never know what that something was as Justice Pain jumped up on the top turnbuckle and pushed Beater off, sending him straight through a conveniently placed table. Eric Gargiulo put over the CZW Cage rules, mainly that escaping the cage does not result in a win, therefore the match went on with Nate Hatred trying to fend off both Pain and Gage by himself. And he didn't do that bad of a job, though considering he's a Satanic monster, would you expect anything less? Hatred had a good momentum going for a few minutes until Wifebeater tried crawling through the cage door. Nick Gage saw this and put the boots to Beater before going back to the outside and slamming Beater's head in the cage door! While he was outside, Gage threw in a few chairs to his partner, who came off the top turnbuckle with a sick chair shot. Pain went for the pin but, much like last week's Hardcore match, Hatred kicked out! Gage decided that was enough and threw a table inside the cage. Pain set the table up and threw Hatred on top of it while Gage climbed to the top of the cage before coming down with a Frog Splash through the table! That was it for Hatred as they both jumped on top of him for the pinfall. Afterwards, The New H8 Club walked to the back while Beater and Hatred recovered in the ring. You could see Beater telling Hatred he was sorry for being the weak link of the team and both men hugged while Pain and Gage made fun of them by calling them crybabies. Beater and Hatred held up each other's hands in one final hurrah as The New H8 Club just flipped them off and walked to the back.

Final Thoughts: Great way to end a feud. I kinda had my doubts since none of the four men were considered great wrestlers but the feud has been pretty engaging as of late, resulting in the brutal cage match. But even though it's been pretty one-sided, I think the right team won as there's more of a future for The New H8 Club than the challengers who were practically thrown together. Grimes/Snitsky was alright considering they didn't want to upstage the main event. But Carter/York did it anyway. :-P

CZWrestling.com Press Release For October 1, 2005 - CZW Star Returns, Fake You! TV Matches Signed, Another Company Folds.

-We would like to welcome Jay Briscoe back to the CZW roster after returning from rehab. We know he and his brother Mark are itching to get back into a CZW ring. Therefore, we have signed them to face Mexico's Most Wanted in just a few days on Fake You! TV.

-After hearing the challenge made between Sexxxy Eddy and Angel next week, Nick Mondo has decided that if Angel gets the win on Tuesday, he will receive the Iron Man title shot at Havoc In Hellaware on October 23!

-In an interesting development, Nick Mondo has also decided to take some action due to The Messiah's recent behavior. Rumor has it that it will involve the CZW World title!

-Also on Fake You! TV, Nate Webb is set to bring out a posse to watch his back in his ongoing battle against Chris Ca$h. After last week's show, he was visibly yelling at Beef and Generico for failing to help him get the win against his foe and the CZW Tag Team Champions, S.B.S. Who are the members of his posse? Find out by tuning in to WWN this Tuesday!

-The final card for Fake You! TV looks like this:

Mexico's Most Wanted vs The Briscoe Brothers

Sexxxy Eddy vs Angel for a shot at the Iron Man title

Mike Quackenbush vs Nicho El Milionario in a sure-fire classic!

-One final note on Fake You! TV, due to our recent money-making success, we have decided to increase the production of our television show. Expect a slicker, more polished edition of Fake You! TV this Tuesday!

-Head on over to our Multimedia section to download last week's mat classic between Tom Carter and Christian York as the Match of the Week.

-Finally, we send our condolences to everyone involved with Jersey All Pro Wrestling as they have gone bankrupt. JAPW has been a staple of the East Coast independent scene and it is sad to see a company with a legacy such as theirs to fade away.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

October 4, 2005

We get a glimpse of the upped production values right off the bat with a new music video. Instead of the copied-from-a-4th-gen-RF Video quality video and the "so bad it's good" theme song, we get a new video set to the tune of Fear Factory's "Cyberwaste". NOTHING! YOU SAY! MATTERS! TO US! FUCK YOU! Good choice.

After the video, Nate Webb is already in the ring holding a mike.

"I took two guys - Beef Wellington and El Generico - under my wing as of late and unfortunately, you can't get the job done and your contracts are officially TERMINATED! Now, Chris Ca$h, I hope you're in the back watching this because I want to introduce you to the two men who are going to help me beat your ass. Ladies and gentlemen, I want to introduce you to...The N8 Club!"

Webb gestures to the entrance where two familiar men walk out. First is El Generico wearing bandanas over his head and across his mask in a nod to Nick Gage, even though it's entirely unnecessary since he's wearing a mask. The other man is Beef Wellington who looks to be injecting himself with a syringe and freaking out at random fans. They step into the ring where Webb asks them a few questions.

"So, Gage, how does it feel to be a part of The N8 Club now?"

"OLE MOTHERFUCKER!"

By this time, Beef is freaking out on the mat and starts pulling one of his boots off, ready to inject the syringe inbetween his toes.

"Wait a minute, what's in that syringe? Steroids or heroin?"

"I don't know anymore! I JUST DON'T KNOW ANYMORE!"

By this time, Chris Ca$h pops up on the entrance way with a cocky grin on his face and clapping. But before Webb can get a word in edgewise, out bursts The New H8 Club who run past Ca$h and slide right into the ring, beating on their dopplegangers.

Chris Ca$h and The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) over Nate Webb and Beef and Generico

What started as a brawl turned into an impromptu match as a ref was sent out to officiate soon thereafter. Then again, this wasn't much of a match as Beef and Generico quickly fell victim to The New H8 Club (with Beef still wrestling with one boot on). Webb had a bit of control over Ca$h but that didn't last long as Pain and Gage rolled back into the ring brandishing chairs and hit Webb with a Con-Chair-To. Ca$h cockily put one foot on Webb's chest, struck a pose and got the easy win.

Cut to backstage where Nick Mondo is sitting in his office. He talked about how he tried to stay out of business and try to run things from afar but with Messiah trying to run the show, he couldn't stand back any longer. So, in a form of punishment for his recent actions, Mondo says Messiah must defend the CZW World title tonight against the man who gave CZW one of their greatest matches in recent memory - L.A. Par-K!

Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween) over The Briscoe Brothers (Jay and Mark Briscoe)

After MMW came out, The Briscoes made their way to the ring to the chorus of a "Welcome Back!" chant from the CZW fans. Jay slapped hands with fans in appreciation and thanks for helping him through his recent ordeal. But once they got into the ring, it was all business. Match of the night wrestling-wise as it was a perfect blend of lucha-goodness and head-dropping-indytastic goodness. But the time away didn't do the Briscoes much good as Mark ended up getting hit with the Montezuma's Revenge for the win. Both teams shook hands and The Briscoes walked to the back. Meanwhile, S.B.S. ran through the crowd and jumped in the ring behind MMW, knocking them out with their tag title belts. If The Briscoes had seen this, they surely would've saved their opponents instead of having them getting ambushed from behind.

Christian York cuts a brief pre-taped promo on Kaos, talking about how he should be the one coming out on top night after night instead of Kaos taking the easy way out. It got the point across but was only maybe a minute long.

Angel over Sexxxy Eddy

Eddy tried to challenge Angel to a Dance-Off but it backfired when he realized that it turned Angel (and probably RF) on. Pretty good match as Angel has wrestled and pretty much been booked as Eddy's bizarro parallel universe twin. And that wasn't more evident than when he went for the Bathhouse Bomb, which is the exact same move as Eddy's Total Sextacy (Springboard reverse SSP). Even though Eddy was close to the ropes, Angel went for the pin. But RF reached into the ring and held Eddy's legs down so he couldn't kick out. Angel and RF screwed Eddy and they're going on to Havoc In Hellaware! Even worse, the duo put the boots onto the Iron Man Champion but Rico ran out and chased them off.

Nicho El Milionario over Mike Quackenbush

Decent match but it seems like I've seen this before. It's like they know guys like Quack, Nicho, York, Kaos, Ruckus, Carter, etc can pull off great matches no matter what, yet they just stick any combination of them in the same scenario. Case in point, Nicho and Quack wrestled an awesome match that was ruined by Ruckus interference. Nicho then went after Ruckus for ruining the match. Isn't this the same thing they're doing with Kaos and Christian York? Not to take anything away from the match, though, as it was better than the majority of the stuff on TV now.

Like Christian York, Vic Grimes cuts a brief pre-taped promo. He didn't really say much other than how he's gonna take the belt off of Messiah. This one didn't work so much.

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © over L.A. Par-K to retain

It didn't look good for Par-K from the beginning as Messiah came out with Gene Snitsky in tow. A great solid match that was filled with wrestling and had the crowd interested from beginning to end. There was a number of near counts that made you believe that Par-K was going to come out of this match with the belt. But it was not to be as right when Par-K caught Messiah with his Yoshi Tonic, Snitsky jumped into the ring and broke up the pinfall with a straight kick to the skull-faced Par-K. The ref admonished Snitsky for interfering, which gave Messiah the chance to get up to his feet and kick Par-K square between the legs and then hit him with the Godsmack for the win. But as great as the match was, the real story was afterwards when out ran Nate Hatred. Messiah practically wet his pants at the sight of him and immediately grabbed his belt and ran straight to the back. Meanwhile, Snitsky, instead of being at Messiah's side, stood steadfast in the ring and engaged in a stare-down with Hatred. The two behemoths stood face to face in the middle of the ring as the show ended.

Final Thoughts: Pretty good show this time around. Not a bad match on the card, with the exception of the opening six-man, but that's because it wasn't so much of a match as it was a riot. Storyline-wise, though, it didn't feel like much was accomplished. It's just a matter of who's going to run in or who's going to cut a promo. The only real advancements was Angel getting his Iron Man title shot and a possible Hatred/Snitsky feud. But the H8 Club parody was pretty funny.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For October 5, 2005 - Another CZW Star Enters Rehab, Fake You! TV Preview.

-After the return of Jay Briscoe, who has just returned from rehab, and B-Boy who is still in rehab, we are disappointed to announce the news of another wrestler who has decided to undergo the same treatment. This time, it's #1 Contender to the World title, Vic Grimes. As you may have noticed on Fake You! TV last night, his promo was brief and barely coherent. After taping that promo, CZW Management had a talk with Grimes where he revealed he's been battling alcoholism, like B-Boy and Jay Briscoe before him. We have come to the agreement to send him to a rehab facility to help him get clean. Though unannounced, the plan was for Grimes to have a rematch against Messiah for the World title at Havoc in Hellaware. Obviously, those plans have been scrapped for the health and well-being of Vic Grimes.

-The matches signed for next weeks edition of Fake You! TV are:

Tom Carter vs Adam Flash

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) vs Beef and Generico

Christian York and Nate Webb vs Kaos and Chris Ca$h

The Sexxx Express (Sexxxy Eddy and Rico) vs Angel and Rick Feinberg

-Also, Nick Mondo has sent us word that he has decided to punish Ruckus for his recent behavior, much like he punished Messiah last night, on next week's episode of Fake You! TV.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

October 11, 2005

Adam Flash over Tom Carter

Thank god Carter was in this match. If it was anyone else, it'd just be a dark match that somehow made it onto TV. Most of the match was spent with Carter stretching out Flash in various positions, until Flash was able to reverse one into a small package and hook the tights for the cheap win. Flash didn't even wait to get his hand raised as he waved off Carter, not wanting any more of him, and promptly limped to the back.

Backstage, we see the CZW Tag Team Champions S.B.S. putting on their gear. Suddenly, Mexico's Most Wanted burst into the locker room and get right into their faces. Excalibur jokes with them, saying "I don't know how you do this in T-J, but in America, you attack us from behind." Halloween just makes it short and sweet "Last match...Havoc In Hellaware...Ladder match!" MMW extend their hands and Excalibur just blows them off. Super Dragon, however, agrees and shakes both men's hands, while Excalibur gives Dragon a "WTF?" look.

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) over Beef and Generico

Yup, you guessed it. SQUASH! If two big pissed off dudes beating the crap out of two little dudes is your idea of fun, have at it. Pretty much the only thing of note is Pain going into 'roid rage and/or heroin withdrawls after the match and beating the crap out of B&G even more, to the point where Gage had to step in and hold him back. Whatta guy.

Cut to backstage in Nick Mondo's office, where Mondo is pretending to do some paperwork until CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion Ruckus interrupts him. Ruckus justs wants to know what his "punishment" is and get it over with. Mondo drops the bombshell that he secretly made the Nicho/Quack match last week a #1 Contender's match without his knowledge. And since Ruckus interfered on behalf of Nicho El Milionario, that means Ruckus must defend the title against him tonight in the main event!

Christian York and Nate Webb over Kaos and Chris Ca$h

A pretty decent tag match considering Webb and Ca$h aren't quite in the same league as York and Kaos. I guess that's why Webb and Ca$h spent most of the match fighting outside of the ring while York and Kaos fought inside. While York and Kaos were trading punches on the top turnbuckle, Webb somehow blinded Ca$h. Kaos threw York off and got ready to hit him with the Flying Guillotine but Ca$h tossed Kaos off, thinking it was York, and Kaos landed right in the arms of York, who promptly took him out with the Onion Buster for the win. Afterwards, York and Webb danced to the back while Kaos and Ca$h traded words and shoves inside the ring.

Cut to a pre-taped promo from Nate Hatred. Hatred takes exception to Messiah calling Snitsky "the sickest man in pro wrestling" because everyone in CZW knows the sickest man is Nate Hatred. Hatred says that when he takes out Snitsky, he's going straight for Messiah and the CZW World Championship.

The Sexxx Express (Rico and Sexxxy Eddy) over Angel and Rick Feinberg

Wow, did this one suck. Though it's not really the fault of Rico, Eddy or Angel. RF not only dropped the wrestling level of this match, but the heat level as well. Just like in real life, anything that RF touches turns to shit. Eddy quickly took out RF with the SexxxyPlex to garner some heat back from this vacuum of suck.

Cut to another pre-taped promo from the CZW World Champion, The Messiah. Messiah mentions Vic Grimes going to rehab, saying "if he can get defeated by the bottle, what chance does he have against me?" Messiah admits that the only person in CZW who even had a sliver of a chance of taking the title from him was Grimes. And now that he's gone, he's just going to sit back and relax. He tells Mondo to retire the belt now, because Messiah will hold onto it forever.

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Ruckus © over Nicho El Milionario to retain

Before the match, Ruckus extends his hand to apologize for interfering last week. And just when Nicho goes to accept, Ruckus slaps the taste out of his mouth. While not as great as Ruckus/Par-K from UVFoE, this match was good for free TV and sufficient enough to make people forget how big a piece of crap the last match was. The end came when Nicho leapt off of the top turnbuckle and caught Ruckus with a huricanrana. Only Ruckus planted Nicho with a powerbomb and hooked his feet on the ropes for good measure. After being named the winner, Ruckus jumped out of the ring and grabbed his belt, only to be caught by Mike Quackenbush, who ran out to ringside to confront Ruckus. The two men started trading punches as the show came to a close.

Final Thoughts: Pretty "bleh" show overall. While the wrestling wasn't groundbreaking, it was solid. That was until the Sexxx Express/Angel and RF match. Just like his real-life counterpart, everything RF touches turns to crap. I don't mind wrestlers parodizing other wrestlers (see last week's N8 Club segment) but this joke has been told...repeatedly. It's getting old. At least Ruckus/Nicho was good enough to salvage the show. Plus, we're getting a Ladder match for the Tag titles at HIH that should rule ass.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For October 15, 2005 - CZW Star To Return! Plus, Fake You! TV Preview.

-We are proud to announce that former CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion and Best of the Best 4 Winner Sonjay Dutt is not only returning to CZW but has signed an exclusive contract as well. Though we have not used him as much as we'd like to due to his commitments with TNA, TNA has recently released him so we were eager to have him return. After signing the contact, Sonjay told CZWrestling.com that "CZW has always felt like my home so I'm glad to be back. But Priority #1 right now is to recapture the Jr. Heavyweight title!"

-Nick Mondo has sent CZWrestling.com a number of announcements regarding next week's episode of Fake You! TV. First, in preparation for his Iron Man title match against Sexxxy Eddy, Angel will have a warm up in a match against Eddy's mentor, Rico! Also, Mondo is booking the match fans have been waiting months for. Mike Quackenbush will get another chance to regain the CZW Jr. Heavyweight title as he faces his rival and the current champion, Ruckus! Also, we have gotten word that CZW World Champion The Messiah has an announcement regarding Havoc In Hellaware and the comments made by Nate Hatred last week on Fake You! TV.

-The final card for Fake You! TV looks like this:

Tom Carter vs Jonny Storm

Kaos vs Chris Ca$h

Rico vs Angel

Ruckus © vs Mike Quackenbush for the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship!

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

October 18, 2005

Tom Carter over Jonny Storm

Carter redeemed himself from the disappointing loss to Adam Flash last week with a win over The Wonderkid in a stellar match. Unfortunately, the fans weren't quite into it as they probably should've been. Storm was able to wriggle out of much of Carter's hold-based offense but wasn't quick enough to get away from Carter's Stretch Plum and had no choice but to tap out.

Cut to a pre-taped promo from (ugh) Rick Feinberg, who is giving Angel a back massage while he lays face down on a locker room bench with a towel covering his backside. Basically, RF just talks about how Angel will beat Sexxxy Eddy at Havoc In Hellaware and become the new Iron Man Champion. But first, he'll beat Rico tonight. Of course, unwitty gay jokes abound in this promo. I don't mind gay characters but I do mind it when it gets annoyingly unfunny. Get this man off my screen.

Rico over Angel

Pretty solid match overall. It's hard to remember that Rico is a great wrestler when he was saddled with that pseudo-gay gimmick in the WWE. It's also hard to remember that Angel is able to keep up with almost anybody when he's saddled with such a crappy manager. Angel thought he had the match in the bag so he went up to the top turnbuckle and launched off with the Flying Fairy splash. Only Rico lifted his leg up and caught Angel right in the mush. While Angel stumbled around the ring clutching his jaw, Rico hit him in the back of the head with a roundhouse kick and pinned him for the win. Afterwards, Angel decided to swallow (pun intended) his pride and extended his hand to Rico. Rico accepted but Angel pulled him in closer and grabbed his ass. Rico was pissed off enough to swing at Angel with another roundhouse but Angel saw it coming and jumped out of the ring, pointing and laughing at Rico all the way to the back.

Cut to backstage where Mexico's Most Wanted are going over their gameplan for their Ladder match at Havoc In Hellaware. Suddenly, the door bursts open and in run S.B.S., their opponents in the Ladder match, who ambush them and hit them with their Tag Team title belts. With Halloween and Damien down, Excalibur yells "That's how you do it in America!" To add more insult to injury, Super Dragon bends down and shakes both of the men's hands once again, only this time while they're unconscious.

After the commercial break, we go back to the backstage area where it looks like The N8 Club (Nate Webb, Beef Wellington and El Generico) are going over some sort of game plan involving the next match with Nate Webb's rival, Chris Ca$h. The camera moves in closer and shows they're really playing Rock Paper Scissors. Dorks.

Chris Ca$h over Kaos

Another great match that, again, the fans didn't go for. This match showed that Ca$h could hang with someone like Kaos and that he is really underrated. Sadly, he just can't garner the heat that would get him over and, if you ask me, the feud with Nate Webb isn't really helping matters any. Kaos had Ca$h groggy and went up top to hit the Flying Guillotine to finish it. Only Christian York made his way out and distracted Kaos long enough for Ca$h to meet him up top and hit him with a top-rope Ca$h Flow for the win. Meanwhile, I'm sure The N8 Club are STILL playing Rock Paper Scissors. While Ca$h celebrates his win, York puts the boots (and the badmouth) down on Kaos.

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Ruckus © drew Mike Quackenbush to retain

I had a feeling that when the ring announcer mentioned "TV Time Remaining" that it would go the time limit. But there was enough back-and-forth action going on in the match that made you feel it would end at any time. There were a number of times that Quack could've won the belt back but Ruckus always kicked out and would roll outside for a breather, that is until Quack got sick of it and would meet him out there and start a brawl. Ruckus had a feeling that he couldn't beat Quack so all he had to do was last the time limit, which he did. After getting his belt back, Ruckus, with a cocky smile on his mug, extended his hand. Quack was understandably wary of accepting it but he did nonetheless. Of course, it was a mistake as Ruckus pulled his hand back and slapped Quack across the face, much like he did to Nicho before his match last week. Ruckus just laughed at his opponent until out from the back ran Sonjay Dutt! Dutt was a house of fire, raining down punches on Ruckus until he put him down with a slam, went up to the top turnbuckle and hit the Phoenix Splash! All the while, Quack sat in the corner watching the whole thing transpire and laughing at Ruckus, who's getting what he deserved this whole time.

Cut to backstage where CZW World Champion The Messiah is standing with his Ultraviolent Death Squad. He talked about the comments made by Nate Hatred last week. Messiah says he's feeling generous and will give him a match with Gene Snitsky at Havoc In Hellaware. Better yet, if he wins, he'll get a World title shot! But Snitsky gets close up into the camera, makes an ugly face and snarls "That's not going to happen!" Messiah eases Snitsky away from the camera and says that even if Nate gets lucky, he'll make sure he'll put down "the biggest monster CZW has to offer".

Final Thoughts: While the wrestling on this show was very good, the crowd sat on their hands through most of it. Not to mention most of the backstage vignettes served absolutely no purpose. This show could've been the best Fake You! yet but it had too many things killing it's momentum. And while I'm sure they'll announce more matches on the website, they didn't do a whole lot to build up Havoc In Hellaware. So far we only have 3 matches announced and the show is in a few days. Then again, they've done this before and pulled out stellar shows so I'm hoping for the best.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For October 19, 2005 - Final Havoc In Hellaware Card!

-To fill out the card set for this Sunday, Nick Mondo has gone on to book two matches that fans are going to look forward to. First, Mondo has set Christian York and Kaos to face each other again, but not in a one-on-one encounter. No, this match will be a Dream Partner match, where both York and Kaos will choose their partner for the night! Also, due to the return of Sonjay Dutt last night on Fake You! TV, Mondo is giving Dutt his first opportunity to win the Jr. Heavyweight Championship in a while. But Mike Quackenbush won't be left out as Mondo is forcing Ruckus to defend the title against BOTH men! That's right, it will be Ruckus vs Mike Quackenbush vs Sonjay Dutt in a Triangle match for the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship!

CZW Havoc In Hellaware

October 23, 2005

Dream Partner Match

Christian York/??? vs Kaos/???

If Hatred wins, he earns a CZW World title shot!

Nate Hatred vs Gene Snitsky

CZW Iron Man Championship Match

Sexxxy Eddy © vs Angel

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Ruckus © vs Mike Quackenbush vs Sonjay Dutt

Ladder Match For The CZW Tag Team Championship

S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur) © vs Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween)

[TheRyno]

CZW Havoc In Hellaware

Live Report

October 23, 2005

Nick Berk over Beef Wellington

Even by dark match standards, this one was pretty "blah". Even though Berk is decent talent, I can understand why they barely put him on TV. And Beef is pretty funny, just not all the time. I don't know, I guess they just didn't click. In keeping with the Kurt Angle ripoff...uh...angle, I guess the story was that Berk was impervious to the dreaded Ass Punch since he injects steroids into his ass on a regular basis. So when he got hit with it, Berk no-sold it and took him out with a Bridged German Suplex for the win.

Jonny Storm over Chris Ca$h

Hey, didn't we already have a dark match? While these guys deserve more opportunities, they're usually relegated to dark match status on the big cards. And I think a part of that is that most of your average CZW fans don't really buy these guys. Both Storm and Ca$h did more than their share in this match but the fans were pretty much non-responding to everything they did. Not to mention this was a continuation of the series of matches that Nate Webb has cost Ca$h. As Ca$h went for the Ca$h Flow off the top turnbuckle, much like he did to Kaos on Fake You! TV, Nate Webb ran out and grabbed his leg, causing Storm to flip out of it and jump back up to hit Ca$h with a Frankensteiner from the top for the win. Webb slaps Ca$h around some more after the match and I'm just wishing this whole feud would end soon since they obviously won't do anything new with it.

Over the video screen, they show an undercover cameraman sneaking into the Ultraviolent Death Squad's locker room as they're working on a plan for Gene Snitsky's match tonight against Nate Hatred. The Messiah sees the cameraman and pushes him out.

CZW Iron Man Championship Match

Sexxxy Eddy © over Angel to retain

Pretty decent match considering it was under Iron Man Rules (ie Anything Goes). There were a few uses of weapons but not much as they pretty much stuck to hard hitting wrestling. I enjoy hardcore as much at the next guy but I want to see wrestling mixed in with it too. Guys like Zandig and Wifebeater aren't wrestlers to me since they pretty much just fall on sharp objects. Guys like Eddy and Angel can mix hardcore and wrestling together and do it well. After putting Eddy down with a few lighttube shots, Angel decided to finish it off with his version of the Total Sextacy, the Bathhouse Bomb. Only when he came down with it, Eddy lifted his knees, practically bending Angel in half...the wrong way. Eddy then put Angel away with the Total Sextacy for the win.

Dream Partner Match

Christian York and Nicho El Milionario over Kaos and Jack Evans

Jack Evans has pretty much been CZW's mercenary as he only shows up when someone needs backup (like Evans/Ruckus vs Quack/Carter). Of course, that really doesn't make for a good team, especially when you're facing off against the caliber of York and Nicho. Pretty good high-flying match, even if it was a bit spotty and disjointed. It all seemed like a game of who can one-up the other instead of an actual wrestling match. At one point, Kaos sat on the top turnbuckle acted as a footstool so Jack Evans could hit his twisting 450 Splash on York with extra leverage. Later on, York sat on the top turnbuckle as well and Nicho came off of York's shoulders with the Guillotine Legdrop onto Evans. From then on, it was down to York and Kaos, with York coming out on top with an Onion Buster for the win.

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Ruckus © over Mike Quackenbush and Sonjay Dutt to retain

Much like the previous match, this one was chock full of high-flying spotty goodness. But that's to be expected when you try to put more than two cruiserweights in the match and tell them to outdo the others. This match would've been a lot better in front of a different crowd, though. It seems like this crowd is dead tonight and they haven't been reacting much to anything. Ruckus continued his dickish ways by spending the bulk of the match out at ringside and letting Quack and Dutt wear each other down. Later on, Ruckus joined back into the fray but Quack and Dutt turned their attention to taking him down. It worked to an extent until they both started fighting each other again. It seemed like Dutt had the match won when he hit Quack with a Phoenix Splash (which Ruckus also uses) but when Dutt went for the pin, Ruckus picked him up and threw him out of the ring before going for the easy pin himself.

Ladder Match For The CZW Tag Team Championships

Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween) over S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur) © to become the NEW CZW Tag Team Champions!

Hot damn! Match of the night by far! Tons of great spots which (finally) got the fans up on their feet. If you didn't know, CZW Ladder matches aren't under regular ladder match rules, meaning the Tag titles weren't suspended above the ring and you had to climb the ladder to get to them. Basically, the ladders are just used to beat the shit out of people and set up some crazy spots. S.B.S. had the advantage for the majority of the match. Super Dragon put Damien in position for the Curb Stomp but instead of putting his foot down, Excalibur jumped off the top rope with a ladder and slammed it down onto Damien's head. Later on, Excalibur put Halloween on a table at ringside and Super Dragon climbed a ladder in the ring and jumped off with a Double Stomp through the table! Miraculously, MMW came back from getting demolished and gained their second win. After disposing of Excalibur with a ladder-aided Montezuma's Revenge (leg spin with a ladder to the head instead of a dropkick) they put away Super Dragon with a Super Curb Stomp of their own. Damien got Super Dragon in a Swinging Pendulum hold, swaying him over a ladder laying on the mat, and Halloween came off the top rope with a Double Stomp of his own, sending Dragon's head into the ladder. Not even Super Dragon could get up from that and Mexico's Most Wanted have finally regained the Tag Team titles!

Nate Hatred over Gene Snitsky to earn a shot at the CZW World Championship

While this match was nowhere near a mat classic, it was a great visual to see the two biggest men in CZW go to town in an all-out brawl. After a few minutes of just plain old fist-fighting around the ring, Snitsky made the mistake of bringing a chair into the ring. When he brought it down on Hatred's head and saw it had no effect on a man as demented as him, he actually begged off. Hatred took the chair away from Snitsky and just demolished him with it. Snitsky tried fighting back from the onslaught of chair shots but it was all for naught as Hatred finished it with a Fire Thunder Bomb on a chair for the win. After the match, Hatred celebrates but is interrupted by the CZW World Champion, Messiah, who is standing on the stage. Messiah tells him he doesn't deserve a title shot but it is merely a distraction as Snitsky picks up the chair and starts beating down the new #1 Contender to the World title. While this is happening, Messiah runs over to tell the ring announcer something and yells at the timekeeper to ring the bell. It's announced that Nate Hatred is getting his World title shot right now!

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © over Nate Hatred to retain

While Messiah had planned for this to be a piece of cake, considering Hatred already wrestled a match and got beaten down by Snitsky, it wasn't as easy as he thought it would be. Messiah wanted to get it over with early with a quick pin but was thrown up into the air by the much bigger Hatred. Messiah tried to wear him down with punches but that only infuriated the monster until he blocked a punch and countered it with a Sitout Chokeslam. It looked as if Nate could possibly win the World title but Snitsky brought out The Dew and Adam Flash to help out their leader. Not even Nate Hatred could fend off three and a half men as Snitsky and Flash practically put Hatred on top of Messiah's shoulders so he could hit the Godsmack for the win. Afterwards, the UVDS put the boots to Hatred until out came Hatred's former tag team partner Wifebeater and his trusty weedwhacker to clear the ring.

Final Thoughts: I may be the only one who thought this but I thought this was a great show. The show was full of good wrestling as there was honestly not a bad match on the card (save for the comedy dark match, obviously). Actually, the opener of Storm/Ca$h was the best match, in terms of wrestling quality. The thing this show had against it was the dead-as-hell crowd, as they hardly gave out heat or popped for anything outside of the insane Ladder match. Hopefully this show will look better on DVD.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For October 24, 2005 - Fake You! TV Reminder, Big Negotiations Planned.

-Just a reminder, just as we do the week after every big show, tomorrow's edition of Fake You! TV will be a recap of the events that took place at Havoc In Hellaware.

-Also, as we enter the homestretch toward Night of Infamy and Cage of Death VII, CZW is currently in negotiations with some of the biggest names in independent wrestling today. We can't give you any hints right now. The only thing we can tell you is that some of them may appear as soon as next week's taping of Fake You! TV. Stay tuned to CZWrestling.com and Fake You! TV as the Road To Cage of Death VII has begun!

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

November 1, 2005

After the opening video played, we get a brief word from Eric Gargiulo, who says that there are so many surprises planned tonight that he doesn't even have a format to work off of. And one of those surprises happened right off the bat as Jonny Storm walked out to the ring for a match, he was attacked from behind by none other than "The Future" Frankie Kazarian! What started as a brawl was quickly turned into an impromptu match.

Frankie Kazarian over Jonny Storm

Spectacular match! Why they put this on first is beyond me. I can understand wanting to hype up a crowd but there's a difference between that and completely blowing away everything following it. Plus I don't think the crowd was ready for such awesomeness. Either they were sleeping or just stood in awed silence. It seems like it's getting harder and harder for a CZW crowd to pop for something that's not blood. Storm went for the Rewind Huricanrana but Kazarian had him scouted and ended up giving him an Electric Chair Drop face first on the top turnbuckle. Kazarian then took Storm up to the top rope and finished him off with the Wave of the Future for the win. Afterwards, Kazarian got a few boos when he stomped on Storm a bit before going to the back.

Cut to backstage where Chris Ca$h approaches Nate Webb in the locker room. You'd think he would've blindsided him, but he didn't. Instead, he told Webb he wanted to end it all tonight in a Tables match. Webb agreed. Finally!

After the commercial break, CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion Ruckus came out to the ring. Since it seems like the inmates are running the asylum tonight, he decided to have some fun and issue an open challenge with the Jr. Heavyweight title on the line. And who would answer that challenge? Shark Boy, that's who! Shark Boy got a pretty decent pop when he came out, even if Ruckus could hardly contain his laughter inside the ring. But Shark Boy got into the ring and went right to the business at hand.

CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Match

Shark Boy over Ruckus © by DQ

Another great match that wasn't quite as good as Kazarian/Storm but still close. The crowd finally started to loosen up with the debut of Shark Boy. While Kazarian/Storm was a bit crisper, the match came out of nowhere and the crowd didn't quite know how to react. Plus they had a good chance to razz Ruckus as Shark Boy came dangerously close to beating him on a number of occasions. Ruckus knew that he could've been beaten easily so he went over to the timekeeper's table to snatch his belt back so he could bring it back in the ring and smack Shark Boy in the head with it...in plain view of the referee! Even though this is CZW, the ref decided to disqualify Ruckus, taking into account the newer, stricter rules. Shark Boy was awarded the win but Ruckus still walks out the champ. And as he was walking to the back, holding up his belt and jawing with the fans, out comes Mike Quackenbush to attack him and throw him through the curtain.

Cut to backstage where the new CZW Tag Team Champions, Damien 666 and Halloween, are still celebrating their victory over S.B.S. at Havoc In Hellware. But, from out of nowhere, come The New H8 Club to blindside them. It ended up being a vicious attack as Justice Pain picked up Halloween and slammed him into the wall and then down to the concrete floor. Meanwhile, Gage threw Damien through a nearby window. The show cut to commercial but when it came back, we saw paramedics tending to the fallen champions while the whole CZW locker room is chewing out Pain and Gage, who flip everyone off and walk out. The paramedics get Damien and Halloween on gurneys and put them in an ambulance before driving off to the hospital. What possessed The New H8 Club to commit such a despicable act?

The Sexxx Express (Rico and CZW Iron Man Champion Sexxxy Eddy) over The Briscoe Brothers (Mark and Jay Briscoe)

Rico and Eddy had a pretty funny entrance, coming out to Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy". Eddy got a leopard-print jogging suit to match Rico's tiger-print suit but he ended up ripping off his warm-up pants revealing the CZW Iron Man title (and his creepy manties) underneath. But, goofy entrance aside, they were ready to go to town against the tough-as-nails Briscoe Brothers. Eddy played Ricky Morton for most of the match, getting double-teamed (not that way!) by Mark and Jay, even falling victim to that swank backbreaker-top rope kneedrop combo. But Eddy somehow got the hot tag out of desperation which allowed Rico to clean house. The Sexxx Express ended up getting the duke when Rico came off with a top-rope moonsault onto Jay as Eddy hit the Total Sextacy on Mark for the double-pin win.

Tables Match

Nate Webb over Chris Ca$h

While CZW is never going to suffer a table shortage, they booked this match to end when the first person goes through a table. They actually built some suspense with just one table by setting it up and constantly teasing who was going to go through it, with either Webb or Ca$h narrowly avoiding defeat at the last second. It looked like Nate Webb would win this one as he had Ca$h laid out on the table and he went to the top turnbuckle with a chair. He leapt off the top with a Chairsault but somehow, the table didn't break at all. It didn't even budge. Ca$h looked to be in a bad way as he caught the full brunt of that chair but as he struggled to get back up, Webb clocked him in the head with the chair, knocking him out cold. But for some reason, Webb walked to the back. After a few seconds, he brought out a giant ladder, which he propped up in the ring. Webb climbed up the ladder but instead of jumping off, he grabbed the celing of Viking Hall, which was barely in his grasp. He proceeded to climb across the top of Viking Hall like monkey bars until he was right above Ca$h and the table. Webb suddenly let go and hit Ca$h with a legdrop right through the table! Webb wins the Table match and his war against Chris Ca$h!

Cut to a pre-taped promo from CZW World Champion The Messiah, who is flanked by his Ultraviolent Death Squad cronies: Gene Snitsky, Adam Flash and The Dew. Pretty much, he just talked about how they played with Nate Hatred at Havoc In Hellaware and teased him into thinking it was possible for him to become CZW World Champion. Now, he's back at the bottom of the pecking order. And since they took out the biggest man in CZW, no one else has a chance to even come close to taking the World title away from The Messiah.

Final Thoughts: Really good show tonight. Great debuts from Frankie Kazarian and Shark Boy as they showed how nice they'll fit into CZW's Jr. Heavyweight scene. And finally a fitting end to the droning Webb/Ca$h feud. The only thing I'm concerned with is that they neither really addressed the events from Havoc In Hellaware (aside from the World title match) or built up Night of Infamy, especially since there's only one more show left before NoI. Plus, what's up with taking out Mexico's Most Wanted right after they regained the Tag Team belts?

CZWrestling.com Press Release For November 2, 2005 - First Night of Infamy Matches Announced, Deals Finalized, More On The Way?

-As you saw on Fake You! TV, Shark Boy and "The Future" Frankie Kazarian are the two newest wrestlers on CZW's roster. Not only that but, right before their debuts, they signed exclusive contracts meaning the only place you'll be able to see Shark Boy and Kazarian is right here in CZW.

-Speaking of exclusive contracts, The Briscoe Brothers have also agreed to wrestle exclusively for CZW.

-In other contract news, the following wrestlers have renewed their exclusive deals with CZW: Nicho El Millionario, Damien 666, Halloween, Kaos, Christian York, Rico, Justice Pain, Nick Gage, Messiah, Wifebeater, Nate Hatred, Ruckus, Excalibur and Super Dragon.

-Not only have Frankie Kazarian and Shark Boy debuted but we are also in negotiations with other phenomenal indy talent to come to CZW and to build some hype for Night of Infamy and Cage of Death VII.

-As for Night of Infamy, Nick Mondo has decided to announce the following matches:

Four men who have taken the Jr. Heavyweight scene, not only in CZW but independent wrestling in general, by storm will square off in an Elimination match to earn a shot at the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship at Cage of Death VII. It will be Jonny Storm vs Sonjay Dutt vs Shark Boy vs Frankie Kazarian! But who will be the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion at Cage of Death VII? You see, Mondo has decided that the constant fighting between Ruckus and Mike Quackenbush must stop now. Therefore, he has booked them in a Ladder match at Night of Infamy for the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship!

-Finally, we send our condolences to the wrestlers and workers of two fellow East Coast independent companies, International Wrestling Cartel and Cyberspace Wrestling Federation, as they have followed many other companies into bankruptcy in recent months.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

November 8, 2005

Shark Boy over Horace The Psychopath

Alright match to open the show with. Unlike last week's opener of Kazarian/Storm, this one let go of workrate and highspots and was mainly comedy based. I think Shark Boy and Beef Wellington are the only wrestlers I know that work over the ass as a body part (not even Angel does that!) as Sharky wears down the backside of Horace with a few bites. While Horace eventually gained the upperhand, he lost it when Sharky rolled away from a middle-rope senton bomb and hit Horace with the Dead Sea Drop for the win.

Cut to a brief backstage promo from "The Future" Frankie Kazarian. Kazarian is pumped for Night of Infamy because he'll defeat "the greatest wrestler from the UK, the greatest wrestler from under the sea and the greatest wrestler from Magicarpetstan" at the same time. They may be the greatest wrestlers from where they come from, but none of them are "the coolest!" Then he'll go on to Cage of Death VII and become the new Jr. Heavyweight Champion because "The Future...looks good!"

The Briscoe Brothers (Mark and Jay Briscoe) over Beef and Generico

Pretty entertaining for what was basically an extended squash. They may be jobbers but Beef and Generico can make almost anyone's offense look good. While Generico was setting Mark up for the top rope BRAINBUSTAH!!!11, Beef tried to hit Jay with the dreaded Ass Punch. But The Briscoes were merely playing with their opponents. Jay blocked the Ass Punch and hit a backbreaker while Mark pushed Generico off the top rope and leapt off with a knee to Beef's face while still in backbreaker position for the win.

Cut to another pre-taped promo, this time from Justice Pain and Nick Gage, The New H8 Club. They bragged about sending Mexico's Most Wanted to the hospital last week and, since Damien 666 and Halloween are unable to defend the titles, Nick Mondo should "do the right thing" and strip them of the titles and put them around the waists of the "deserving" team of The New H8 Club.

Backstage, Kaos blindsides Christian York. These guys are still feuding? Nate Webb and Chris Ca$h got about more airtime than they have.

Rico over Chris Ca$h

Nice solid match between an underestimated veteran and an overlooked up-and-comer. Although his feud with Nate Webb wasn't the greatest in terms of booking, hopefully it'll lead to him getting showcased on a larger scale. While this match was even for the most part, Ca$h practically fell victim to himself as he was still very sore from his Tables match with Webb last week. Ca$h went for the Ca$h Flow but couldn't lift Rico up so Rico retaliated with a roundhouse kick to the head before going up top and delivering a moonsault for the win.

Cut to yet another pre-taped promo, this time with former CZW Tag Team Champions S.B.S., with Excalibur talking for the always-silent Super Dragon. Excalibur pretty much bitched about fighting Mexico's Most Wanted for months and not being able to end up on top yet The New H8 Club was able to take them out of the game in one night. While he's bitching, Super Dragon just stands there with his arms crossed, causing Excalibur to yell at him for not being motivated enough. Without hesitation, Dragon slaps the taste out of Excalibur's mouth which causes him to shut it fairly quickly.

Nicho El Milionario over Gene Snitsky

Boy, this is a mismatch if ever I saw one. Even though the match had good intentions to be a David vs Goliath match, it didn't quite get the job done. Most of the match was spent with Nicho using his speed to get away from the clumsy Snitsky but it ended up looking like a Keystone Cops routine. Not to mention that Nate Hatred had eventually made his way out to ringside to distract Snitsky. Nicho leapt off the top rope to hit Snitsky with the Guillotine Legdrop but Snitsky had caught him and was ready to give him a powerbomb. But Hatred slid into the ring and caught Snitsky with a chop block to the back of the knee, causing Nicho to land on top of Snitsky and get the surprise pinfall. Hatred was egging Snitsky on to see if he would hit him back but, before he could, out came The Messiah with his trusty CZW World Championship belt. Messiah took the mike and told Snitsky to calm down and relax. Hatred gives up and walks to the back. Messiah then cuts a promo about relaxing at Night of Infamy because, not only is everyone too scared to face Snitsky, but no one has stepped up to the challenge of taking the CZW World title off of him. So he tells Snitsky to go pack their things because they're taking the week off. As Snitsky walks to the back, Messiah continues bragging but someone jumps the railing and slides into the ring, making a beeline straight towards the World Champion. But for some reason, security doesn't even bother trying to detain the fan. But after Messiah escapes with his belt, it is revealed that the crazed fan is none other than Devon Storm! He points at Messiah, who looks like he's seen a ghost, and makes the belt-around-the-waist motion to end the show.

Final Thoughts: Great surprise to end the show with. While Devon Storm isn't a huge name (his biggest claim to fame is being a schizophrenic mechanic in WCW), people know he's a solid wrestler and has a big chance of becoming the new CZW World Champion. Other than that, nothing really clicked. Rico/Ca$h was solid but Nicho/Snitsky was too much of a mismatch and Shark Boy/Horace was too comedy. Plus, they still didn't do too much to build Night of Infamy. Instead of playing pre-taped promos, they should've built matches. All the matches for NoI have pretty much been booked on their website.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For November 9, 2005 - Final Night of Infamy Card!

-It seems as if Nick Mondo is finally bound and determined to take the CZW World Championship away from The Messiah as he intended to when he returned as the Authority of CZW. After the Fake You! TV tapings, not only did Devon Storm sign an exclusive contract with CZW but he also granted him a title shot against The Messiah as his first match in this company! Devon Storm has wrestled just about everywhere across the country but how well will he fare in CZW against the World Champion?

-Last night, The New H8 Club cut a promo talking about how they should be the CZW Tag Team Champions ever since they put Mexico's Most Wanted on the shelf. These comments gave Mondo an idea. If Justice Pain and Nick Gage want to be Tag Team Champions, they'll have to work for it. That's why, at Night of Infamy, it will be a 4-Way Tag Team Elimination match between The New H8 Club, Beef and Generico, The Briscoe Brothers and S.B.S. to crown the next #1 Contenders to the Tag Team titles!

-Much like Mondo decided that the feud between Ruckus and Mike Quackenbush must end at Night of Infamy, he has decided that another long running feud must end, that being the feud between Christian York and Kaos. He credits both Kaos and York for their resilience and their inability to stay down. But this time, they must fight until one of them is put down because Nick Mondo has booked Christian York and Kaos to square off in a Last Man Standing match!

CZW Night of Infamy

Live At The New Alhambra Arena

November 13, 2005

4-Way Elimination Match To Determine The #1 Contender To The CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship

Jonny Storm vs Sonjay Dutt vs Shark Boy vs Frankie Kazarian

4-Team Elimination Match To Determine The #1 Contenders To The CZW Tag Team Championships

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) vs Beef and Generico vs The Briscoe Brothers (Mark and Jay Briscoe) vs S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur)

Last Man Standing Match

Christian York vs Kaos

Ladder Match For The CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship

Ruckus © vs Mike Quackenbush

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © vs Devon Storm

Edited February 5, 2006 by TheRyno

[chazmers]

just read the whole thing, great diary man keep it up! good to see ur not bringing in too many names which could ruin CZW in some sorts and keeping it real. keep up the good work

[TheRyno]

CZW Night of Infamy

Live Report From The New Alhambra Arena

November 13, 2005

Nate Webb over Angel

Dark match time! This one actually wasn't bad for a dark match that was played mainly for comedy as Webb and Angel were able to mix some decent wrestling in. Rick Feinberg jumped on the apron and attempted to hit Webb with a brick-loaded purse (???) but Webb ducked and hit Angel instead. Webb then hit the Soylent Green for good measure and got the win. Afterwards, RF tried to stand up to Webb but Webb put him out as well.

4-Team Elimination Match

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) over Beef and Generico, S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur) and The Briscoe Brothers (Mark and Jay Briscoe) To Become #1 Contenders To The CZW Tag Team Titles

This match was non-stop action from top to bottom, so much so in fact that a lot of the people in the crowd didn't know what to make of it. Beef and Generico were obviously the first team eliminated as they fell to a quadruple-team beatdown from The H8 Club and S.B.S. The Briscoes tried to save the poor underdogs but they were too late as El Generico was press-tossed out of the ring by The H8 Club and Beef fell to a Tiger Driver from Excalibur for the elimination pin. Pain and Gage took a sabbatical out of the ring while The Briscoes and S.B.S. tangled. S.B.S. were eliminated next when Jay wriggled out of a Psycho Driver and hit Super Dragon with a Tiger Driver (aka Jay Driller) of his own. It then came down to The Briscoes and The H8 Club, who had an intense staredown that the crowd popped for big time. Sadly, it was a power game that the smaller Briscoes lost as not only were they not able to match strength with Pain and Gage but The H8 Club were also refreshened after that breather. While Pain beat on Mark, Gage hit Jay with a Frog Splash for the pin. Mondo put three teams in the way of The New H8 Club and they were still able to come out of the match with what they wanted: a shot at Tag Team gold.

After the match, the video screen in the arena showed Devon Storm in the locker room, taping up his wrists in preparation for his CZW World Title match against The Messiah later tonight. He cut a brief promo talking about how he has butterflies in his stomach since his first match in this company is for the biggest prize in this company. But he vows to take the World title off of Messiah and he'll do it for the fans tonight.

4-Way Elimination Match

Sonjay Dutt over Jonny Storm, Shark Boy and Frankie Kazarian To Become The #1 Contender To The CZW Jr. Heavyweight Title

You would expect that four of the best lightweights in CZW facing off would be lightning-quick blur that would be over in a flash. While it was quick, they wrestled a crisp and precise match compared to the previous Elimination match that was basically a free-for-all beatdown. The match actually went a while without an elimination until Shark Boy countered the Rewind to eliminate Jonny Storm. But as the elimination was being announced, Kazarian jumped into the ring and rolled up Shark Boy with his feet on the ropes for the second elimination. Sonjay then got into Kazarian's face until Kazarian answered him with a shove. It then broke down into a brawl that Kazarian eventually got the better of. He put Sonjay on the top rope and got ready to hit the Wave of the Future but Sonjay had the wherewithal to hold onto the ropes and when Kazarian went to flip over with it, he was the only one that ended up hitting the mat. With Kazarian lying prone on the mat, it was the perfect opportunity for Sonjay to hit the Phoenix Splash for the win. Sonjay Dutt is going on to Cage of Death VII to face either Ruckus or Mike Quackenbush for the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Title!

Last Man Standing Match

Christian York over Kaos

The hatred between these two men finally came to a head tonight in a great match, probably the best in their series. The match actually went a while without a pinfall as both men wanted to wear the other down. York put Kaos down with an Onion Buster for the first pinfall but Kaos was back up by the count of 7. York went for another one but Kaos reversed it and ran up the corner to hit him with a Sliced Bread #2 that put him down for the count of 5. But while the ref was counting, Kaos went outside and brought a chair back with him. Kaos laid the chair down on the mat and grabbed York, lifting him up and putting him down with his Shooting Star Ganso Bomb, sending York's head into the chair with a sickening crack. Everyone in the crowd thought that was the end but York, with help from the ropes, was barely able to get up to his feet by the count of 9. Kaos got pissed that he couldn't put him down so he threw York to the outside before leaping off the apron with a Flying Guillotine to the outside! Kaos rolled him back in and made the pin but, again, York was able to get up by 9. Kaos climbed to the top rope and intended to finish it with a 450 Splash but York was able to grab the chair and block it. The ref started a ten count as both men felt the impact of the chair and it took them a while to get to their feet. York was up first and he brought the chair down on Kaos' skull before going up top and coming back down with a Frog Splash into a pin. Kaos was down until 8 but York had more plans with the chair. Much like Kaos, York left it down on the mat and picked Kaos up and brought him down with an Onion Buster onto the chair. That was finally enough to put Kaos down for the ten count as the crowd jumped to their feet and gave both men a standing ovation for going through such a brutal match.

Ladder Match For The CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship

Mike Quackenbush over Ruckus © To Become The NEW CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion!

While this match was better wrestled than the previous one, it just didn't have quite as much impact on the crowd as the Last Man Standing match did. And you would've thought that a Ladder match would be Ruckus' forte but Quack was on top of his game here. Ruckus flipped around a few times but Quack used his submission techniques to wear down the high-flyer so he couldn't take to the skies. Ruckus tried giving Quack a superplex with a ladder laid across the second rope but Quack crotched Ruckus, setting him up with a double stomp to the head. Ruckus later gave Quack a reciept by smashing the ladder into Quack's head. With Quack out, Ruckus set up a ladder and climbed up it before jumping off with a Phoenix Splash. But Quack was able to roll out of the way, leaving Ruckus to hit nothing but the cold, hard mat. Quack then picked up Ruckus and hit him with a Quackendriver onto a ladder lying on the mat. But that wasn't enough for Quack, as he wanted Ruckus to suffer. Therefore, he slapped on the Lightning Lock tight in the middle of the ring. Ruckus tried to fight it off but was in so much pain that he had no choice but to tap out. After many months, Mike Quackenbush regains the Jr. Heavyweight title and comes out on top over Ruckus! Quack clutches the belt tight to his chest before climbing the top of a ladder and raising the belt high amongst the adulation of the crowd.

As Ruckus is being helped to the back and the ring is cleared of various ladders, a video pops up on the large screen. It shows the The New H8 Club celebrating their win earlier tonight to become the #1 Contenders to the CZW Tag Team titles. But as it happens, they are jumped by Nicho El Milionario and L.A Par-K, no doubt payback for what Justice Pain and Nick Gage did to Mexico's Most Wanted a few weeks back.

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © over Devon Storm

Devon Storm walked out to the ring to a chorus of cheers, albeit looking a bit flustered for wrestling such a high-profile match. But Storm had no reason to be nervous as from the moment Messiah got into the ring, Storm routinely out-wrestled the CZW World Champion. It got to a point where Messiah got out of the ring, grabbed his belt and started walking to the back, content on getting counted out and screwing the fans out of a great match. But Messiah's bodyguard, Gene Snitsky, walked out and whispered something in his ear that got his confidence back up. Again, Messiah kept getting out-wrestled by Storm but Storm always had to keep his eye out on Snitsky. The match was thought to be over when Storm hit Messiah with the Mindbender but Snitsky jumped into the ring and attacked the ref before he could count to three. Snitsky stalked Storm but Nate Hatred ran out and started beating on Snitsky. Storm attempted to revive the ref but it ended up backfiring on him as Messiah got up behind him and delivered The Fall From Grace (Burning Hammer) before the now-revived ref counted the pinfall. Hatred, seeing what just happened, jumped into the ring after Messiah but Messiah escaped and grabbed his belt before walking to the back. Hatred then helped Storm, who got a good amount of applause for his efforts, to his feet to end the show.

Final Thoughts: Great show, maybe even the best one of the year. None of the matches disappointed in the slightest. The Elimination matches served their purposes for fast-paced action and set up some challengers for Cage of Death. The feuds between Quack/Ruckus and York/Kaos were ended in stellar fashion. And we saw Messiah's greatest challenge yet. This is definately a must-see when it comes out on DVD, VHS or whatever. Just get your hands on it.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For November 14, 2005 - Night of Infamy Aftermath, Wrestler Released.

-After seeing The Messiah sneak out of another victory with the CZW World Title around his waist and seeing Devon Storm on the losing end of what was otherwise a great technical display, Nick Mondo has decided to book a rematch for the next edition of Fake You! TV, which will tape on the 21st and air the 22nd! And this time, he'll make sure Messiah won't have anything up his sleeve.

-Also on Fake You! TV, Mondo has decided to book the #1 Contenders to the CZW Tag Team titles, The New H8 Club, in a match against Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K after seeing the fight that broke out backstage during Night of Infamy. Nicho and Par-K surely want some revenge for Justice Pain and Nick Gage sending the CZW Tag Team Champions, Mexico's Most Wanted, to the hospital at the beginning of the month and this is the best shot they'll get.

-The final lineup of the November 22nd edition of Fake You! TV looks like this:

Shark Boy vs Nick Berk

Frankie Kazarian vs Kendo Ka Shin

The Briscoe Brothers (Mark and Jay Briscoe) vs The Black T-Shirt Squad (Tom Carter and New CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion Mike Quackenbush)

Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K vs The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage)

Night of Infamy Rematch For The CZW World Championship

The Messiah © vs Devon Storm

-Finally, we have decided to release Hallowicked due to not having anything for him to do on recent shows. We wish him the best of luck in the future.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

November 22, 2005

Shark Boy over Nick Berk

While one of the better CZW comedy matches in recent memory, it still didn't do much to get the fans riled up for later in the night. Once again, this match centered around the ass of Nick Berk as it seemed he was impervious to Shark Boy's ass bites due it being his preferred location of steroid injections. When it seemed all was lost, Berk picked up Sharky for the Angle Slam but Sharky wriggled out of it and hit the Dead Sea Drop for the win.

Cut to backstage, where we see Nick Mondo and Devon Storm talking things over in Mondo's office. Suddenly, in bursts the CZW World Champion, The Messiah, who notices their "chumminess" and talks about how there's a conspiracy to take the belt off of him. Storm is quick to get into Messiah's face saying "Conspiracy? Maybe there is, maybe there isn't. It doesn't matter. All I'm concerned about is getting that belt around my waist." Messiah and Storm have an intense staredown before Mondo gets between them and tells them to settle it in the ring.

Black T-Shirt Squad (Mike Quackenbush and Tom Carter) over The Briscoe Brothers (Mark and Jay Briscoe)

The BTS got a great ovation due to fan-favorite Mike Quackenbush regaining the CZW Jr. Heavyweight title at Night of Infamy, which helped propel them to victory here tonight. This was a great technical match that showed the Briscoes could grapple with the best of them, as well as drop them on their heads without remorse. During the melee, Carter powered out of a Jay Driller attempt and flipped him over, right into the waiting arms of Quack, who slapped on the Lightning Lock for the submission victory.

Cut to backstage where we see Christian York leaning up against a wall in the hallway, sipping on a cold beverage. Ruckus walks past him when it seems that York had some soda go down the wrong pipe as he starts to cough. Ruckus turns his head and glares at York yelling "You making fun of me cuz I lost the belt to Quack? Fuck you! I didn't fucking choke, bitch!" Ruckus forcibly pushes York against the wall and stomps off, leaving York confused as to what exactly just happened.

Frankie Kazarian over Kendo Ka Shin

Decent match here but didn't really have much going for it unlike the last two. Kazarian had Ka Shin in the corner, ready to lift him up top for the Wave of the Future when, from out of nowhere, Ka Shin powers out of the corner and hooks Kazarian in an armbar. But Kazarian saw they were too close to the ropes so, instead of putting his feet on the ropes to get the ref to break the hold, he uses the ropes for leverage to put Ka Shin into a pin that he couldn't kick out of. After announcing the decision and the ref making Ka Shin break the hold, Kazarian made his way to the back knowing that he barely squeaked out another win tonight.

Cut to backstage again where Gene Snitsky is walking down the hall towards The Messiah's locker room. But just before he gets there, he is ambushed by Nate Hatred brandishing a chair. After bringing the chair down across Snitsky's skull and busting him open, Hatred reveals he was sent by Mondo to make sure Snitsky didn't screw Devon Storm out of the CZW World title once again. It looks like Snitsky will be a non-factor in the main event tonight.

The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) over Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K

Nicho spent the beginning of the match using his speed to evade Pain and Gage, which worked quite well until he tried to hit a springboard moonsault onto Nick Gage, who caught him and flattened him with a powerslam. Much of the match from then on consisted of Pain and Gage double-teaming Nicho who was going for the hot tag. Once he finally got the tag, Par-K brought his trusty chair in and cleaned house, sending The New H8 Club to the outside where they fell victim to a triple-jump plancha from Nicho. It looked like Nicho and Par-K were well on their way to avenging their brothers in La Familia, but Justice Pain and Gage had some tricks up their sleeve. While they were recovering from aftermath on the outside, Pain handcuffed Nicho to the guardrail, leaving Par-K to get double-teamed inside the ring. All Nicho could do was watch as Pain and Gage lifted Par-K up in a double chokeslam and put him right through the chair set up in the middle of the ring and get the three count. Afterwards, Nicho tried getting out of his handcuffs while The New H8 Club beat down his partner but out ran the CZW Tag Team Champions, Mexico's Most Wanted, with chairs of their own! Pain and Gage quickly jumped out of the ring before getting their deserved beatdown as the crowd cheered for the Damien and Halloween's return. MMW then helped Par-K to the back while security unlocked Nicho from the handcuffs.

CZW World Championship Match

The Messiah © over Devon Storm

The Messiah made his way to the ring, not looking like his cocky self. With Adam Flash injured and Snitsky taken out by Nate Hatred earlier tonight, Messiah has to fight this battle on his own for once. Devon Storm then came out looking sure of himself, not only getting over some of the nerves from Night of Infamy but knowing that he has what it takes to one-up Messiah. Storm looked to have this match in the bag as he had out-wrestled Messiah to the point of exhaustion. Just like Night of Infamy, Messiah jumped out of the ring, took his belt and started walking to the back. Knowing there wasn't anyone back there that would change his mind about getting back in, Storm followed him. Messiah then got down on his knees in the middle of the aisle and started to beg. Storm wasn't having any of it and reared back to hit him. Suddenly, a tall muscular figure ran out from behind the curtain and leveled Storm with a huge lariat. It wasn't until afterwards that everyone discovered it wasn't Snitsky who ran out, but it was Mike Awesome! It looked like Awesome has sided with The Messiah! Awesome picked Storm up and threw him in the ring but was blocked by the referee. That ended up being a mistake for the ref as Awesome had no problem with knocking him out. While all this was happening, Messiah grabbed a table from underneath the ring and set it up inside. Awesome then picked up Storm and carried him to the top turnbuckle, where he then proceeded to drive Storm through the table with an Awesome Bomb. To add insult to injury, Messiah put one foot on top of Storm's prone body as Awesome picked up the ref's hand and brought it down three times. Messiah then proceeded to call out the rest of his Ultraviolent Death Squad (minus the injured Flash) and celebrate his "victory", still standing on top of Storm to make it seem like he was as big and bad as Awesome and Snitsky. Messiah and the still-bandaged Snitsky then raised Awesome's hands and officially inducted him into the Death Squad to end the show.

Final Thoughts: Wow! Mike Awesome? I totally didn't see that one coming. They did a good job of making me think Messiah was going to get beat only to have him trick us all again. And Mexico's Most Wanted are back so maybe we can see the MMW/H8 Club feud go full bore now. The rest of the show was solid but was pretty much overshadowed by main event time.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For November 23, 2005 - Fake You! TV Preview For Next Week.

-Nick Mondo was obviously pissed off after the show last night when he realized he was duped by The Messiah yet again. But Mondo has decided to give both Devon Storm and Nate Hatred a small measure of revenge next week as he booked them to team up against Gene Snitsky and the newest recruit of the UVDS, Mike Awesome.

-Also on tap next week is the return of Mexico's Most Wanted after being out of commission for the past couple weeks at the hands of The New H8 Club. CZW Management has learned that they have been both cleared to wrestle and both want to get their hands on Justice Pain and Nick Gage. But Mondo has decided against having the big money match right away and instead are booking both teams in singles matches. Next week, it will be Damien 666 against Nick Gage and Halloween against Justice Pain.

-The full card for next week's edition of Fake You! TV looks like this:

Chris Ca$h vs Angel

Black T-Shirt Squad (Mike Quackenbush and Tom Carter) vs The Sexxx Express (Sexxxy Eddy and Rico)

Damien 666 vs Nick Gage

Halloween vs Justice Pain

Devon Storm and Nate Hatred vs Gene Snitsky and Mike Awesome

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

November 29, 2005

Angel over Chris Ca$h

While Ca$h and Angel are both good talent, the crowd was practically asleep during this match. Not to mention they went more for comedy than actual wrestling, which both can do. When Ca$h lifted Angel up for the Ca$h Flow, Rick Feinberg got up on the apron, which allowed Angel to float over and lock on the Testicular Claw. Ca$h somehow rolled out of it but laid prone near the corner, which allowed Angel to hop over Ca$h and jump on the second turnbuckle to deliver the Bathhouse Bomb for the win.

Cut to backstage where Nick Mondo is at his desk looking over some paperwork when The Messiah strides in with the CZW World Championship draped over his shoulder and a cocky smile on his face. Messiah brags about screwing over Mondo and the fans with his actions last week. Plus, he demands that since his briefly former bodyguard, Mike Awesome, is no longer here that the main event tag match be cancelled tonight. Mondo tells Messiah that not only will the tag match go on as planned tonight but he's replacing Mike Awesome with The Messiah himself! Messiah starts to argue but Mondo tells him that Zandig is pissed and he should be lucky that he doesn't strip him of the World title and fire him on the spot! With that, Messiah shuts up and gives Mondo an evil glare before storming out.

We then go to another part of the backstage area where Super Dragon and Excalibur cut a brief promo. Excalibur blames Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K for hogging the tag spotlight when Mexico's Most Wanted got injured. He then goes on to say that they can prove that the S.B.S. is the best tag team in CZW when they face off against Nicho and Par-K on Fake You! TV next week!

Sexxx Express (Sexxxy Eddy and Rico) over Black T-Shirt Squad (Mike Quackenbush and Tom Carter)

Very good match that was mainly centered around Jr. Heavyweight Champion Quackenbush working over the Iron Man Champion, Sexxxy Eddy. As much as Eddy was getting stretched out by the techical expertise of both Quack and Carter, Rico would always be in the corner encouraging him to endure the pain and stick it out. But it got to the point where Eddy couldn't take much more...or so everyone thought. Later on, when all four men were in the ring duking it out, Rico connected with a roundhouse kick to the head of Quackenbush. But Eddy was right behind as he hooked Quack in a schoolboy and got the surprise pin.

Cut to a brief backstage promo from Sonjay Dutt, who talks about looking forward to facing Mike Quackenbush at Cage of Death VII for the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship. He brings up some history, reminding us that it was Quack who originally took the belt from him at No Rules, No Limits back in June. And last month, he had to go through three other men, namely "that putz Frankie Kazarian" to get the opportunity to get the belt back. So he's bound and determined to walk out of Cage of Death with the belt around his waist once again.

Damien 666 over Nick Gage

While definately not a technical affair, this match did a great job of getting the crowd riled up as Gage beat down Damien mercilessly. Every time Damien tried to get back up, it seemed like Gage always had something to put him back down with, which made the crowd really want Damien to make the comeback. And that he did as, after Gage put Damien down with a chairshot, Gage climbed up to the top turnbuckle to finish things off with the Frog Splash. But Damien was able to get up and crotch Gage on the top turnbuckle before mustering up all the strength he could to pick him up in the La Marionette and drive Gage's head into his shoulders and get the quick pin. Right after Damien was announced the winner, Gage got pissed and started throwing a tantrum in the ring, accusing the ref of giving him a fast count.

Justice Pain over Halloween

Even though this was technically a better match than Damien/Gage, it didn't get the crowd near as involved. Halloween and Pain didn't back down from each other, resulting in a brawl where neither man got the upper hand. Eventually, it seemed as if Halloween's speed wore down Pain but he never got the opportunity to capitalize as Nick Gage ran down to the ring and hit him with a chair behind the ref's back. It was academic from there as Pain gave Halloween the Pain Thriller for the tainted victory. But before The New H8 Club got a chance to beat down Halloween, out ran Damien 666 for the save.

Cut to backstage where Christian York is seen roaming the hallways. Suddenly, he is jumped by Ruckus and beaten down to the ground. As he stomps down on him, Ruckus is heard yelling "Who's choking now, bitch!"

Devon Storm and Nate Hatred over The Messiah and Gene Snitsky

Great match that combined the wrestling of Storm and Messiah with the brutal brawling of Hatred and Snitsky. It looked like the underhanded tactics of the Ultraviolent Death Squad would've sealed the deal but Storm and Hatred fought back valiantly. Messiah had Storm on his shoulders, ready to deliver the Godsmack, but when Messiah spun him, Storm landed on his feet and lifted him up for the Mindbender. But before he could deliver the finishing blow, Snitsky ran in and plowed right into both men, sending them falling out of the ring. Snitsky flexed to the booing crowd but that proved to be a mistake as Hatred came up behind him and gave him a Fire Thunder Bomb for the win. But as Storm and Hatred celebrated their victory, their opponents got back into the ring and attacked them from behind (Snitsky with a lariat to Hatred and Messiah hitting Storm with the World title belt) and stomped them down to the mat as the show ended.

Final Thoughts: A small part of me was afraid the show would fall apart due to the last minute firing of Mike Awesome. But CZW answered back with a solid show. Save for maybe Ca$h/Angel, there wasn't a bad match on the show. Not that Ca$h/Angel was bad but it was weak for an opener. Cage of Death VII is less than a month away so it'll be fun to see how they build up for it and if they have any more surprises up their sleeve (that turn out better than the Awesome surprise did, hopefully).

CZWrestling.com Press Release For December 1, 2006 - Fake You! TV Preview, CZW Wrestler Awaiting Return!

-After watching the great tag team match involving the Sexxx Express and the Black T-Shirt Squad, Nick Mondo had an idea for a match: Champion vs Champion! Next week on Fake You! TV, it will be CZW Jr. Heavyweight Champion Mike Quackenbush facing off against CZW Iron Man Champion Sexxxy Eddy. Mind you, neither belt will be on the line but a whole lot of pride may be as each man will be representing their respective divisions. Which will prevail? The high-flying yet technical-based Juniors or the stiff, hard-hitting, bordering-on-hardcore Iron Men? Find out next week!

-Also, as a preparation for Cage of Death VII, the #1 Contender to the CZW Jr. Heavyweight Championship Sonjay Dutt will face off against the previous champion, Ruckus. While these men have faced off many times before, you'll have to wonder if Ruckus' mind will be on the match as he's been more focused on Christian York, who hasn't even done anything to provoke the ire of Ruckus in the first place!

-The final card for the first Fake You! TV episode of December looks like this:

Chris Ca$h vs Horace The Psychopath

Mike Quackenbush vs Sexxxy Eddy

Sonjay Dutt vs Ruckus

S.B.S. vs Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K

-Earlier today, we have recieved word that B-Boy has finished his stint in rehab. Not only that, but he has dropped by the offices of CZW Management to sign an exclusive contract! We welcome B-Boy back to the roster and await for his return.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

December 6, 2005

Chris Ca$h over Horace The Psychopath

While not as good as his match with Angel last week, Ca$h and Horace were able to get the crowd into the match a bit more. I blame it on RF. Anyways, it looked like Horace had Ca$h beat so he climbed up to the second turnbuckle to deliver a senton bomb. Only Ca$h rolled out of the way, leaving Horace to land flush on his back. Not only that, but Ca$h hooked Horace for the pin and also hooked his feet on the ropes to get the cheap pin. Afterwards, Horace starts going nuts but Ca$h grabs a mic and tells security to come out and restrain him. While Horace is being led to the back, Ca$h cuts a promo talking about ever since he lost to Nate Webb months ago, he's been relegated to "jerking the curtain and jobbing to bad gimmicks". As Ca$h continues his rant, a man in army fatigues jumps the guardrail and slides into the ring behind Ca$h. Since security is too busy with Horace, they don't even notice what this man is doing. But Gargiulo and the crowd know who this man is...it's The Joker! Ca$h's biggest rival has returned from his tour of Iraq! Joker taps Ca$h on the shoulder causing him to turn around. Ca$h knows who it is right away, judging by the look on his face. Ca$h begs off but Joker kicks him in the gut and plants him into the mat with the Joker Driver!

Cut to backstage in Nick Mondo's office. The New H8 Club burst in and yell at Mondo, saying they're sick of toying around with Mexico's Most Wanted and they should've been the CZW Tag Team Champions by now. They don't want to wait until Cage of Death, they want their title shot tonight! Mondo tells them "If you want to throw your shot away tonight, fine!" Mondo makes the match and The New H8 Club with devious smiles on their faces.

Mike Quackenbush over Sexxxy Eddy

Neither Quack's Jr. Heavyweight title nor Eddy's Iron Man title were on the line, but you wouldn't have known it by the way they wrestled. While Eddy played the underdog and got a few good shots in, he couldn't overcome the technical expertise of Quackenbush. Eddy was worn down enough that he had no choice but to submit to the Lightning Lock. After the match, Quack got both belts from the timekeeper and gave the Iron Man title back to Eddy before shaking and raising his hand in a great show of sportsmanship. But as Eddy walked to the back while Quack stayed in the ring playing to the fans, he was jumped in the aisle by the returning B-Boy! B-Boy rocked Eddy with a couple punches before laying him out with a DDT on the concrete floor. Quack saw what was going on and raced to Eddy's aid but not only was the damage done but B-Boy had also made off with the Iron Man title belt as well!

Sonjay Dutt over Ruckus

Every time these two get together, they put on a great high-flying exhibition and tonight was no exception. After a few minutes of trading and countering armdrags, Ruckus got the upperhand by blocking a German suplex attempt with a mule kick between Dutt's legs. Ruckus played with Dutt from then on and looked to finish it off with the Phoenix Splash. But Christian York made his way out to ringside and distracted Ruckus. While Ruckus yelled at York, Dutt got back to his feet and gave Ruckus a sweet armdrag off the top turnbuckle before climbing up top and hitting his own Phoenix Splash for the win. While Dutt danced his way to the back, York stepped into the ring and stood over Ruckus, mockingly clapping and celebrating his loss. Ruckus used the ropes to pull himself up and managed to push York away but, instead of just pushing back, York grabbed Ruckus and dropped him with the Onion Buster in the middle of the ring. I don't quite know what's going on between these two...but I like it.

Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K over S.B.S. (Super Dragon and Excalibur)

Sweet lucha goodness here. It was a battle between the lucha legends and the young up-and-comers that looked up to them, no matter what they say to the contrary. In the end, S.B.S. basically got schooled in the ways of Mexican wrestling, which was no more evident than when Excalibur fell to a Guillotine Legdrop from Nicho and a corkscrew plancha from Par-K for the win. But maybe S.B.S.'s plan wasn't to beat them but to embarass them instead as Super Dragon came back into the ring with Par-K trusty chair and knocked Par-K out with it before hitting Nicho with the Psycho Driver. Dragon left both men for dead as he picked up Excalibur and helped him to the back.

Cut to backstage where Nate Hatred is walking! But he walks right into an ambush by the Ultraviolent Death Squad. After getting a few shots in, Messiah tells Snitsky to keep laying into Hatred because he's got "bigger fish to fry". Messiah walks off while Snitsky holds Hatred back, allowing The Dew to get in the wimpiest shots ever.

CZW Tag Team Championship Match

Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween) © over The New H8 Club (Justice Pain and Nick Gage) To Retain

Great main event that saw the lucha stylings of MMW and the hardcore brawling of the H8 Club mesh together well. Due to some underhanded tactics, Pain and Gage ended up getting the upper hand. But that's when they got cocky as they stopped the match and motioned towards the back for someone to come out. That's when Super Dragon (with Par-K chair, still) and Excalibur came out and interjected themselves into the match. Pain grabbed Halloween in a full-nelson and had Excalibur hold the chair up to Halloween's face while Dragon came towards them with his springboard spinning crescent kick. Only Halloween slipped out of Pain's clutches, causing Dragon's kick to send the chair into Pain's face, knocking him out. S.B.S. stood in the ring arguing at the plan going awry until Halloween sent them out of the ring with a double clothesline. That's when MMW got back together and double-teamed Gage, resulting in the Montezuma's Revenge for the win. Afterwards, The H8 Club and S.B.S. surrounded the ring ready to pounce on the Tag Team Champions until Nicho and Par-K ran back out and helped their fellow Familia members clean house.

Cut to backstage where Nick Mondo is closing up his office. He gets ready to lock his door when he is attacked by The Messiah! Messiah rams Mondo's head into the door a few times before throwing him back into the office. The door slams shut but you hear the beating continue for a few moments before the show ends.

Final Thoughts: Fake You! has been really good on a consistant basis lately. Each show has been solid from top to bottom with maybe only one slow or quiet match that gets forgotten about by the end of the night. They're really starting to get the Cage of Death hype in high gear too. They brought back Joker for an encounter with Chris Ca$h and B-Boy returned for his Iron Man belt. The MMW/H8 Club feud has really gotten hot with S.B.S. and Nicho and Par-K added to it. The only thing that's not clear is the World title scene but I'm sure it'll be much clearer by Cage of Death time.

CZWrestling.com Press Release For December 7, 2005 - Legend Announces Retirement, Fake You! TV Preview, Wrestler Released.

-Earlier this week, the wrestling world was saddened to hear that Abdullah The Butcher has announced that he will retire by the end of the year. Abdullah's brutal wrestling style was admired by many wrestling fans, some of which would go on to become members of CZW's talent roster. Therefore, we have contacted Abdullah to appear on Fake You! TV next week so we can celebrate his illustrious career and give him the proper send-off that he deserves.

-Due to the sickening attack at the hands of The Messiah, Nick Mondo will not be appearing on next week's edition of Fake You! TV. Worse yet, he had not booked any matches beforehand. Therefore, the CZW Management Committee has booked the following matches to take place next week:

Kaos vs The Joker

B-Boy vs Rico

Nicho El Milionario vs Excalibur

L.A. Par-K vs Super Dragon

CZW Tag Team Championship Match

Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween) © vs Beef & Generico (Beef Wellington and El Generico)

-CZW Management has also let go of Jack Marciano. We wish him the best in the future.

[TheRyno]

CZW Fake You! TV Report

December 13, 2005

Kaos over The Joker

Very good opener to kick off the show. Technically speaking, this was the best wrestling match of the night. I would've figured Joker would've had some ring rust, not just from being away from the ring so long but from being in Iraq as well. It seemed as if Joker had Kaos well scouted as he was able to counter much of Kaos' offense. But it was all for naught as Chris Ca$h made his way out to ringside as Joker was going for the Joker Driver. Joker made the mistake of letting go of Kaos so he could push Ca$h off of the ring apron. When Joker turned back around, he walked right into the Shooting Star Ganso Bomb that gave Kaos the win. Afterwards, Ca$h slid into the ring and put the boots to Joker while he was down.

Cut to a promo from B-Boy that was taped earlier in the day. He talks about attacking Sexxxy Eddy last week and getting the Iron Man title back, which is draped over his shoulder. He reminds everyone that he never lost the belt, that it was stripped of it by Nick Mondo, so he still considers himself the Iron Man Champion. He tells Eddy that he did a good job of "holding the belt" for him until he came back but the belt is back where it belongs now. B-Boy ends the interview by officially challenging Eddy to a match at Cage of Death VII for the belt, saying "if you want it back, come get it."

Rico over B-Boy

Can't believe I missed this match. Blame Taco Bell for giving me the runs. I thought I'd get done by the time the commercials were over but I was wrong. I'm just gonna pretend it was the best match ever and move along. I did catch the ending, though. Rico was down and B-Boy was set to give him a Shining Wizard but Sexxxy Eddy reached in and grabbed his foot. That distracted B-Boy enough to take a roundhouse kick to the head from Rico and leave him lying down long enough to take a Ricosault to end the match. Eddy then had gone over to the timekeeper's table and taken the Iron Man title belt back for himself. I guess he really did take B-Boy's advice after all.

Cut to backstage where Christian York cuts a brief promo. He doesn't know what he did to piss off Ruckus but he's taken offense to it anyways. He then mocks Ruckus for having a deeply-seeded inferiority complex but he's going to give him a reason to have one as he beats Ruckus next week on Fake You! TV.

Nicho El Milionario over Excalibur

Pretty good match here as both men were able to pull off a speedy, high-flying match. But the story here was that Excalbur couldn't match the years of experience that Nicho has had accumulated over the years as Nicho was able to somehow counter Excalibur's Tiger Driver '98 with a huricanrana, hooking the legs to get the pin. Nicho celebrated his win all the way to the back, slapping hands with the fans, as Excalibur stayed inside, kicking the ropes and swearing revenge.

L.A. Par-K over Super Dragon

Decent match, but not quite as good as Nicho/Excalibur as Par-K's lucha style and Dragon's hard strikes clashed a little bit throughout the match. Par-K had brought in his trusty chair to combat Dragon's strikes but that ended up backfiring as Dragon had put Par-K down with a Curb Stomp and laid the chair down in the middle of the ring, ready to deliver a Psycho Driver right onto it. Dragon picked Par-K up but Par-K was able to swing around and counter it with the Yoshi Tonic into the deciding pinfall. Dragon rolled to the outside to collect himself as Par-K set up the chair to do his patented victory dance. Dragon saw this as a prime opportunity to get revenge and rolled back into the ring to kick Par-K feet out from under him, causing him to land chest first on the set-up chair. With the wind knocked out of him, Dragon positioned Par-K's head on the seat of the chair and climbed up to the top turnbuckle, only to come back down with a Double Stomp right on Par-K's head!

After a commercial break, we come back to see Eric Gargiulo standing by himself in the middle of the ring. He talks about his special guest who has announced his retirement from the world of wrestling. Gargiulo then officially announces Abdullah The Butcher after running down a list of his accomplishments. Abdullah comes out to the ring clad in a suit that looks surprisingly great on him. Once Abdullah gets into the ring, Garguilo hands him the mike so he can give a farewell speech. He looks around the New Alhambra soaking in the deafening "AB-BY! AB-BY!" chants. But those chants are cut off with music as the Wifebeater walks to the ring with a mike of his own.

"I hate to interrupt this celebration but I just want to let you know that I, and all the boys in the back, greatly respect you and what you've done for the wrestling business. I'll go out on a limb and say that if it wasn't for guys like you and your brutal battles, CZW would've never been established. With that said, ever since you announced your retirement, I've been thinking. It's not like Abdullah The Butcher to come out to the middle of the ring, give a speech and just wave goodbye to the fans forever. No, he should be making as much of an impact on his way out as he did when he was in. So I have to ask you a favor. I want Abdullah The Butcher to wrestle one last time here in CZW. Better yet, I want to be a part of it. How about you and me at Cage of Death...in a barbed wire match?"

The fans in the Arena pop at this huge announcement. Abdullah looks around at the reaction they're getting and then looks right into the eyes of Wifebeater before shaking hands to seal the deal. Abdullah's final match will happen right here in CZW at Cage of Death VII!

CZW Tag Team Championship Match

Beef & Generico (Beef Wellington and El Generico) over Mexico's Most Wanted (Damien 666 and Halloween) © To Become The NEW CZW Tag Team Champions!

Everyone thought that this was going to be a cakewalk for Mexico's Most Wanted and indeed, it did start out that way. That was until The New H8 Club came out to ringside to heckle the champions. It did a little bit to unnerve the champions but not enough for the challengers to take advantage of it. Justice Pain and Nick Gage then got sick of heckling and decided to interject themselves into the match by pulling Halloween off of the apron just as Damien was going for a tag. Damien and the ref tried to admonish The New H8 Club but that left Damien wide open for the dreaded Ass Punch from Beef Wellington! And as the momentum of the Ass Punch sent Damien toward the ropes, Pain grabbed a chair and clocked Damien over the head with it. Damien stumbled backward into a schoolboy from El Generico which the ref had no choice to count the pinfall. Beef & Generico have done the impossible and become the new CZW Tag Team Champions but no doubt with the help of The New H8 Club. But while the new champions celebrated the biggest wins of their career, The New H8 Club and Mexico's Most Wanted brawled at ringside.

Cut to backstage where Devon Storm is walking the halls of the Arena, only to walk right into a chairshot from The Messiah! With Storm down on the concrete floor, Messiah drives the chair into Storm's stomach and throat a few times before walking off with a smile on his face, satisfied that all his enemies have been eliminated.

Final Thoughts: Great solid show this week. Once again, not a bad match on the card. This time, even the opening match stepped up to the plate and knocked one out of the park. We got a huge match set for Cage of Death with Abdullah's final match, not to mention the B-Boy/Eddy match. Of course, the big story is Pain and Gage costing MMW the Tag titles so it'll be interesting to see what's planned for them at Cage of Death, not to mention Messiah taking out all of his enemies. I'm sure he'll be booked for something (he is the World Champ, of course) but for what?

CZWrestling.com Press Release For December 14, 2005 - Mondo Returns To Sign Another HUGE CoD Match!

-Nick Mondo has decided to return to Fake You! TV next week after suffering a brutal attack from The Messiah on December 6. But before he makes his official return, he has signed a blockbuster match to take place at Cage of Death VII. As if the matches already announced weren't enough, this one will undoubtedly make CoDVII the biggest independent wrestling event of the year. It will be the team of Damien 666, Halloween, Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K facing off against the team of Justice Pain, Nick Gage, Super Dragon and Excalibur. The wars between these eight men had come to a head last night as Justice Pain and Nick Gage had robbed Mexico's Most Wanted of the CZW Tag Team Championships! Also, Nicho El Milionario and L.A. Par-K had beaten S.B.S. in singles matches but Super Dragon had gotten enough revenge for the both of them as he could've possibly broken Par-K's neck or crushed his head with that Double Stomp on the chair. Mondo has decided that the only way to settle the score will be INSIDE THE CAGE OF DEATH!

-Mondo has also made it known to CZWrestling.com that, when he returns to Fake You! TV next week, he will have something in store involving The Messiah, Cage of Death VII and the CZW World Championship. But he will not let anyone in on what exactly that secret is. The only hint he has given us is that Messiah hasn't eliminated all of his enemies like he thought. Mondo's return to television next week is proof enough of that, but we'll have to see what kind of tricks he has up his sleeve.

-In other CoD news, B-Boy had challenged Sexxxy Eddy to a match for the Iron Man title that he stole from him on December 6. But after his match with Rico where Eddy stole back the belt, B-Boy tried to back out of the match that he had made since he "wasn't the champion anymore". CZW Management has decided that, to punish B-Boy for stealing the Iron Man title belt in the first place, that the match will go on as planned. It will be Sexxxy Eddy defending the Iron Man Championship against B-Boy at Cage of Death VII!

-The matches officially signed for Fake You! TV next week are:

Tom Carter vs Nick Berk

Shark Boy vs Kaos vs Frankie Kazarian

Christian York vs Ruckus