WWE: The Suicide Diary

[Malenko]

i think you're doing a very good work on keeping lawler and bischoff's character personalities close to reality.

you're going to fire one of your most over non-wrestlers allready? wasn't the date of your game somewhere near the time when bischoff and foley were co-general managers? maybe you could had foley to austin's team. Just an idea.

P.S.

Jerry Lawler:

“Shane O Mac!! What is he doing here?”

Jerry Lawler:

”I think that’s an obvious one, King. These two just will not rest until one of them is destroyed.”

Jerry Lawler:

“Well, that man is going to be Shane unless he realizes that he is playing with fire. Quite literally.”

you have mistaken there.. it was supposed to be JR on the second.

[Guest raze0811]

i think you're doing a very good work on  keeping lawler and bischoff's character personalities close to reality.

you're going to fire one of your most over non-wrestlers allready? wasn't the date of your game somewhere near the time when bischoff and foley were co-general managers? maybe you could had foley to austin's team. Just an idea.

P.S.

Jerry Lawler:

“Shane O Mac!! What is he doing here?”

Jerry Lawler:

”I think that’s an obvious one, King. These two just will not rest until one of them is destroyed.”

Jerry Lawler:

“Well, that man is going to be Shane unless he realizes that he is playing with fire. Quite literally.”

you have mistaken there.. it was supposed to be JR on the second.

←

Thanks. I've missed that commentary screwup. I blame it on copy and paste gone awry.

As for the timeline. Yes, Mick Foley came back as the "consultant" for Raw on the 12/1/04 episode. Good idea, you had there, I'll try to think if I can work it in somehow. I already hada rough outline leading up to WrestleMania XX, but your suggestion is worth noting.

[Guest raze0811]

Note: I planned on doing this at the end of every month, but since I’ve never done one yet at all, I figured now I might as well post an update on the rosters in WWE, their overness, gimmicks, and storylines so readers can catch up easily, or recap, depending on if it’s a new reader or somebody who has been following along. I will still provide one at the end of every month, but this one is going up now too. So, without further adieu . . . .

THE RAW REPORT

Tuesday October 21, 2003

Faces are BLUE

Heels are RED

Tweeners are GREEN

(D) Indicates this wrestler has yet to debut

Overness and gimmicks follow names

Main Eventers:

Goldberg: 82, Hero

The Rock: 95, Unique

Chris Jericho: 92, Egomaniac

Triple H: 93, Frachise Player

Upper Midcarders

Booker T: 83, Sucka

Kevin Nash: 69, Cool

Rob Van Dam: 84, Show Stealer

Kane: 86, Psycho

Midcarders

Bubba Ray Dudley: 77, Extremist

Dvon Dudley: 74, Extremist

Goldust: 83, Freak

Hurricane: 80, Comic Book Hero

Lita: 80, Tomboy

Mark Jindrak: 54, None

Tommy Dreamer: 69, Extremist

Trish Stratus: 80, Old School Face

Val Venis: 69, Adult Film Star

Batista: 76, Demon

Christian: 84, Sidekick

Gail Kim: 65, Evolution

Jazz: 72, Bad Ass

Randy Orton: 84, Cool

Rene Dupree: 70, Blue Chipper

Scott Steiner: 75, Monster

Sylvan Grenier: 70, Evil Foreigner

Test: 72, Cocky

Victoria: 65, Crazy

William Regal: 71, Rich Snob

(D) Raven: 79, Loner

Lower Midcarders

Ivory: 65, None

Lance Storm: 64, Fun Babyface

Maven: 68, Blue Chipper

Rosey: 63, Sidekick

Spike Dudley: 65, Underdog

Chris Nowinski: 66, Arrogant

Molly Holly: 72, Clean Cut

Rico: 74, Gay

Rodney Mack: 64, Bad Ass

Openers:

Garrison Cade: 42, None

Jacqueline: 53, Bad Ass

Non-Wrestlers

Al Snow: 77, Staff Member

Shane McMahon: 85, Cool

Shawn Michaels: 92, Old School Face

Steve Austin: 90, People’s Boss

Eric Bischoff: 84, Evil Boss

Managers

Stacy Keibler: 85, Dancer

Miss Jackie: 53, Seductress

Ric Flair: 91, Suave

Stevie Richards: 70, Putz

Theodore Long: 66, Troublemaker

Current Storylines

Having just won the World Heavyweight Championship from Triple H, Goldberg has already been targeted by numerous challengers that have emerged to try to collect a $100,000 bounty placed on Goldberg’s head by The Game himself. Goldberg subsequently brutally attack and hospitalized The Game, in effect ending the bounty by removing the man who was supposedly going to pay it. Many expect Ric Flair, the next in line member of Evolution, to step up and challenge Goldberg next. But will he?

Chris Jericho and Christian have been trying to get Stone Cold Steve Austin removed as co-General Manager of Raw. Eric Bischoff also joined the cause due to his growing hostilities with the Rattlesnake. The challenge has been made and accepted, where Stone Cold and Eric Bischoff will each lead a team of themselves and four other superstars against each other at Survivor Series in a classiv Survivor style match. The losing captain will also lose his job at WWE. Bischoff has so far recruited Jericho and Christian, and Austin has recruited Booker T. Who else will be recruited before Survivor Series?

Kane and Shane McMahon have been bitter rivals for almost two months now. Fresh off of a Last Man Standing match at the last PPV, they are now all set to have an Ambulance Match at Survivor Series. But at the rate they are attacking each other, will these men still be able to compete by then?

Edited May 20, 2004 by raze0811

[Guest raze0811]

THE SMACKDOWN! REPORT

Tuesday October 21, 2003

Faces are BLUE

Heels are RED

Tweeners are GREEN

(D) Indicates this wrestler has yet to debut

Overness and gimmicks follow names

Main Eventers:

Kurt Angle: 92, Legitimate Athlete

The Undertaker: 85, Biker

Brock Lesnar: 85, Legitimate Athlete

Upper Midcarders

Chris Benoit: 88, No Gimmick Needed

Eddie Guerrero: 73, Cheater

Edge: 85, Mysterious

AJ Styles: 82, Cocky

Big Show: 84, Monster

John Cena: 85, Rapper

Midcarders

Billy Gunn: 70, Old School Face

Billy Kidman: 65, None

Bradshaw: 70, Cowboy

Chavo Guerrero: 68, Cheater

Rey Mysterio: 87, Show Stealer

Rikishi: 75, Fun Babyface

Ron Simmons: 70, Bad Ass

Ultimo Dragon: 75, Foreign Star

Zach Gowen: 72, Underdog

A-Train: 70, Monster

Charlie Haas: 75, Legitimate Athlete

Chris Kanyon: 70, Old School Heel

Jerry Lynn: 78, No Gimmick Needed

Matt Hardy: 84, Cult Leader

Rhyno: 87, Man Beast

Sean O’Haire: 81, Evil

Shelton Benjamin: 75, Legitimate Athlete

Tajiri: 80, Martial Arts

Lower Midcarders

Hardcore Holly: 66, Bad Ass

Nathan Jones: 69, Psycho

Scotty 2 Hotty: 80, Fun Babyface

Spanky: 63, Fun Babyface

Tatanka: 52, Native American

Chuck Palumbo: 75, Blue Chipper

(D) EZ Money: 65, Arrogant

Jamie Noble: 65, Trash

Johnny Stamboli: 70, Fiery Italian

Kid Kash: 70, Cocky

Mark Henry: 52, Legitimate Athlete

Nunzio: 69, Fiery Italian

Shannon Moore: 70, Lackey

Bill DeMott: 65, Crazy

Openers:

Funaki: 52, Staff Member

Orlando Jordan: 40, Blue Chipper

Danny Basham: 44, Monster

Doug Basham: 50, Machine

Non-Wrestlers

Stephanie McMahon: 88, Commissioner

Tazz: 72, Staff Member

Sable: 70, Arrogant

Managers

Torrie Wilson: 79, Cheerleader

Dawn Marie: 60, Slut

Nidia: 62, Trash

Paul Heyman: 80, Sports Agent

Shaniqua: 46, None

Current Storylines

At No Mercy, Kurt Angle won back the WWE Championship during a Triple Threat match with Brock Lesnar and the Undertaker. The other two men are bound to not be happy about this outcome, but the question leading up to survivor Series will be who will be the next challenger in the title picture?

AJ Styles and Chris Benoit have been feuding for the past month, ever since Styles targeted Benoit upon his debut in order to make a name for himself in the WWE. At No Mercy, AJ Styles managed to cheat his way to a cheap victory over Benoit. In addition, Benoit was seriously hurt during the match and may not be able to appear on the next SmackDown. This is sure to only provoke AJ Styles’s ego further.

Los Guerreros have expressed that their primary goal for the foreseeable future is to regain the WWE Tag Team Championships, which they lost to Big Show and A-Train at No Mercy when Eddie was knocked unconscious with an illegal belt shot. No doubt this desire will fuel Los Guerreros in the weeks leading to the Survivor Series.

Kid Kash and Jerry Lynn have emerged on the SmackDown scene and were both participants in a Four Corners match for the Cruiserweight Title at No Mercy. Both men are arrogant and cocky, and both are hungry for gold. Meanwhile, Spanky is going strong as the current Cruiserweight Champion, but will either of these new faces prove to be a viable threat to his dominance of the Cruiserweight Division?

[craig]

nice but i am confused, your sig says goldberg is champ but during raw says HHH is champ, but at that time goldberg was champ so who is raw world champ?

[Malenko]

goldberg won the title from triple h. if you read his last raw preview you'll see this:

"Poor Goldberg just can’t catch a break. Fresh off of his World Title victory over Triple H, he now must deal with the $100,000 bounty on his head that The Game placed there to get rid of him."

[Guest raze0811]

Wednesday October 22, 2003

I didn’t know why, but Vince McMahon had decided that I tag along on one of his road trips with Triple H again. His motivation? Maybe he liked me, or maybe he was just following that “keep your enemies closer” mentality. Either way, I don’t know. What I do know, is that after our previous visit to “Mike the Headless Chicken’s House of Great Tasting Fried Chicken,” I was not looking forward to this.

So there we are, in Vince’s BMW. Triple H was in the passenger seat and I was couped up in the backseat. From the angle of his shoulder, it looked like Triple H’s hand was on Vince McMahon’s thigh. I was mortified and tried to look out the window and avoid noticing the way Triple H’s head gradually angled toward Vince McMahon’s shoulder.

Vince: I’m trying to drive.

Triple H: Poo.

Triple H sat back up straight and seemed upset. I rolled my eyes.

Me: So . . . . . where exactly are we going?

Vince: We, my good man, are going to Mel’s Formal Wear to rent tuxedoes for this upcoming wedding. My big boy is marrying my big girl.

Me: And I’m coming along because … ?

Triple H: You’re standing in the wedding.

Me: WHAT ?!? When did this happen?

Triple H: Believe me, it wasn’t my call.

Vince: It was my idea. We have Nash, Michaels, Shane, Show, and you. Test was supposed to stand, but he said he’s gonna be sick that day.

Me: The wedding is like a month away. He’s gonna be sick that day? He knows this now?

Vince: What? You don’t believe him?

Me: Whatever. Why me? Wasn’t there anybody else that would do it?

Triple H: Nobody else likes me.

Triple H started crying and for a second I almost felt bad. Almost. Vince put a reassuring arm around his future son-in-law/current lover and spoke softly to him.

Vince: It’s okay, cuddly wuddly. Its okay.

Suddenly Triple H sat bolt upright with real excitement and pointed out the window.

Triple H: CHICKEN PLACE!!!!!!! CHICKEN PLACE!!!!! I STILL WANT CHICKEN!!!!!!!

Vince: Whoa, calm down. Let’s not forget what happened last time we tried to stop at a chicken restaurant.

Triple H: I’M HUNGRY NOW!!!!!!!!!

Vince: We’ll eat later. Look, we’re at the tuxedo place already.

Triple H: I WANT A NUDE WEDDING!!!!!!!

Vince: Really? I like the sound of that.

Me: Holy crap. I’m about to vomit.

Vince: Be nice.

Me: Be sane.

Triple H: Okay, we can go look at tuxedoes I guess.

Vince: That’s my boy.

We got out of the car and went inside the shop. It smelled tranquil inside of Mel’s Formal Wear, almost floral. A very, very, large woman was working behind the cash register, ringing up what must have been some insanely extravagant purchase. As she worked, she took colossal bites of a huge jelly donut. Globs of jelly fell onto a stack of papers that looked like receipts or invoices or something. Taking no notice, she finished ringing up the order on the register and promptly filed away the invoices in a filing cabinet. I watched in shock as the jelly glob disappeared into the cabinet along with the papers. I did not have a good feeling about this place.

The fat woman looked at us with the most bored, “Oh-Great-More-Customers” face I’ve ever seen, and then addressed us.

Fat Woman: What can I do for you?

Vince smirked.

Vince: I’m shopping for groceries!

The woman’s expression did not change. Vince leaned on the counter in a suggestive manner and ran his hand through his hair.

Vince: Get it? Groceries? This isn’t even a grocery store!!!!!!

Fat Woman: Is that like a joke or something?

Vince: Don’t you know who I am?

Fat Woman: A wanna-be Don Juan?

Vince: I’M VINCE MCMAHON, DAMMIT!!!!!

Triple H: HE’S VINCE MCMAHON, DAMMIT!!!!!

Fat Woman: I’ve never heard of a Vince McManus.

Vince: MCMAHON!!!!

Triple H: MCMAHON!!!!

Fat Woman: McWhat do you want?

Vince took a breath and collected himself. He straightened his lapels and cleared his throat. The fat woman’s expression had never changed.

Vince: Look, we have a wedding coming up. We want to get fitted for tuxes.

Fat Woman: Is the groom here?

Triple H: I’m the groom.

Fat Woman: You look like a fucking steroid freak.

Triple H: WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Fat Woman: You’re lucky . . . we have a special this week.

Triple H: Oh . . . . . . okay.

Fat Woman: So you’re Vince McNamara, you’re the groom . . . . .who are you?

The fat woman was now pointing at me.

Me: I’m Raze.

Fat Woman: And I am so yours.

Me: Excuse me.

Fat Woman: Tuxes for the whole wedding party are on the house if you come in the back room with me right now?

Me: Ahem . . . . . .Excuse me?

Fat Woman: You heard me.

Triple H: JUST DO IT I WANT FREE TUXES!!!!!!

Me: You mean like take on for the team?

Triple H: YES!!!!

Me: Because you’re Mr. Team Player, right?

Vince: Well you know, miss, I’d love to take you in the back and . . . .

Triple H: NEVER!!!!!!!!

Vince: Its nothing personal, Cuddly Wuddly, I just always had a thing for . . . .

Triple H: YOU WILL NOT CHEAT ON ME DAMMIT!!!!!

Fat Woman: Wait . . . . you two are together? So this is like . . . .a gay wedding.

The fat woman looked at me curiously and her eyes seemed to register understanding.

Fat Woman: Ohh . . . . Ewwww…. Nevermind.

Me: Wait . . . . I’m not. . . . . . .no, you got it wrong . . . . . .

Triple H: I’M MARRYING A WOMAN!!!!!!

Fat Woman: And I’m Doctor Fucking Atkins.

Vince: Has anybody ever told you that you have beautiful calves?

Fat Woman: My calves are flabby and I haven’t shaved them in two months.

Vince: Big and hairy . . . . . Just the way I like ‘em.

I had to do it. I coughed very loudly.

Me: {Cough} A-Train {Cough}

Triple H: CAN WE JUST ORDER OUR TUXES ?!?!?

The fat woman just looked at me and licked some loose jelly off of her fingers. Vince’s eyes rolled back.

Vince: Uhhhh . . . . . .uhh uhh uhh

He spasmed slightly. He politely excused himself to a restroom. I did not ask.

Fat Woman: That depends. You gay or not?

Me: Of course not.

Fat Woman: Well how about it then? You and me, hot shot. I have more folds than you’ll know what . . . .

Me: Wow, that’s entirely more information than I ever needed to hear about.

Fat Woman: I even have elbow fat. I can hold you down all night.

Triple H: Now that’s more like it!! I know about holding people down!!

Fat Woman: Oh do you now?

Triple H: Hell yeah lady!! I’ve held all kinds of people down in my life!!!

Me: See? You two would be a perfect fit for each other. You don’t need me, lady.

Triple H: I don’t know . . . . she’s kinda fat and gross.

Fat Woman: Umm . . . . I can hear you. I’m standing right here, you fucking freak.

Triple H: WHAT DID YOU SAY ????

Fat Woman: I said this must be your lucky week.

Triple H: Oh . . . Okay. Why is it my lucky week?

Fat Woman: Cuz I’m gonna pleasure you and give you free tuxedo rentals.

Triple H: Well . . . . I do like to save money.

The fat woman grabbed his wrist.

Fat Woman: Well come on . . . . . we’re going to the store room out back!!

She started dragging Triple H toward a back door. Vince had just emerged from the restroom.

Vince: Oooh . . . . . . Oooh . . . . . . . . I got seconds!

Fat Woman: Come on then!!

Vince: Alright!!!!!

Vince skipped happily behind them as the fat woman turned to look at me.

Fat Woman: You want thirds?

Me: Fuck no. I’ll wait here.

They disappeared through the door. I decided I was not far enough away and walked out the front door and up the street. I didn’t know where I was going . . . . but anything had to be better than a one mile radius to the Vince/Triple H/Fat Woman ménage a trios.

Little did I know . . . . . . . . . . . .

Edited May 21, 2004 by raze0811

[Guest J_Lethal]

LMAO,This is golden. You tha man Raze.

[Ace]

Me: See? You two would be a perfect fit for each other. You don’t need me, lady.

Triple H: I don’t know . . . . she’s kinda fat and gross.

Fat Woman: Umm . . . . I can hear you. I’m standing right here, you fucking freak.

Triple H: WHAT DID YOU SAY ????

Fat Woman: I said this must be your lucky week.

Triple H: Oh . . . Okay. Why is it my lucky week?

Fat Woman: Cuz I’m gonna pleasure you and give you free tuxedo rentals.

Triple H: Well . . . . I do like to save money.

The fat woman grabbed his wrist.

Fat Woman: Well come on . . . . . we’re going to the store room out back!!

She started dragging Triple H toward a back door. Vince had just emerged from the restroom.

Vince: Oooh . . . . . . Oooh . . . . . . . . I got seconds!

Fat Woman: Come on then!!

Vince: Alright!!!!!

Vince skipped happily behind them as the fat woman turned to look at me.

Fat Woman: You want thirds?

Me: Fuck no. I’ll wait here.

←

[Guest raze0811]

Wednesday October 22, 2003

So there I was walking along down the street. Up ahead there was a small hole in the wall bar. A beat-up red Ford pick-up truck with no tailgate was parked out front, and a motorcycle was staged nearby. The road I walked along was paved at least, but the smaller road that branched off of it and led to the bar was not. It was just mud and small shells, as was the parking lot. I veered along this road. I had some cash on me, with the money Vince was paying me I ALWAYS had cash on me these days. Thinking of the obscene triple threat match going on at Mel’s Formal Wear, I knew I needed a drink. How Vince and Triple H would find me afterward did not concern me all that much right now.

So finally I came up to the bar, which emanated a curious urine-like smell. I tried as best I could to ignore the smell, noticing the puddle of piss I inadvertently stepped in along the way, which was the source of the odor. I winced as I wondered who would piss in the parking lot in the middle of the day, but cast the thoughts aside. I walked in.

There was an old jukebox in the corner, but it did not appear to be functional. Some country tune played amidst static from an old style manual tuner radio behind the counter. The bartender looked like he was a brewsky shy of being rip-roaring drunk, and the sole patron, a beefy black-leather clad tough guy with lots of chains, sat near a window off to the side giving me a curious look. As if he could not figure out if he would buy me a beer or cut my stomach open.

I seated myself at the counter and ordered a beer. The bartender hiccupped several times as he staggered to the cooler to get it. After three broken bottles, his attempt at fetching a bottle was successful and there I sat drinking away my horrible thoughts, when I heard the bar door slam open with a CRASH and a wild eyed man stood there with bloodshot eyes and a much, much too sun burnt pigment of skin.

Man: Mel!!!! They gots two men up at the store running a train on your wife!!!!

The biker, an angry scowl appearing on his face, slowly stood as his face proceeded to get redder and redder. He smashed his beer bottle against the table, breaking it and turning it into a weapon. So this guy was Mel? The Mel? What was a fat angry biker doing owning a formal attire store?

Mel: Well, we better get on over there, I think? You got your truck?

Man: Hell yeah! Got me two shotguns in it, too!!

Shotguns?!?

Mel joined the other man as they sped out the door. I could not believe what I was hearing as I jumped up and ran after them. I guess I hoped to stop them. It was already too late. They were in the truck and pulling off, and I unfortunately was on foot. I ran after the truck as fast as I could. But the two men easily reached Mel’s Formal Wear three or four minutes before me. Prior to my arrival, I believed the situation had blown over, as all was quiet. But just as I was approaching, the gunfire began.

BANG!!!!!! BANG!!!!!!

I heard glass explode. I heard shouting. Suddenly, Vince McMahon emerged from the front door as a slug flew right over his head and almost hit me. Mr. McMahon was completed nude except for what had to be a pair of Women’s panties wrapped around his neck. If I had to estimate, I would say the size of the panties was at least a 24 or 25.

Vince: Holy shit!! We have to get out of here!!! These guys are nuts!!!

Me: Where’s Triple H?

Vince: Who?

Me: You know, your boyfriend. . . . . The guy we came here with.

By that point Mel was standing just outside the door, holding his shotgun at the ready. Vince, proving his cowardliness, hid behind me and held on so that when I tried to move I could not shake him. Now I was all that stood between Mel and Vince. Judging from the look on Mel’s face, he would just as soon pump the slugs through me to get Vince. But even worse was the fact that naked Vince McMahon was hiding behind me!!

Mel: Well, well, well, I should have known you were with these jokers!

Me: I had nothing to do with this.

Mel: I don’t care.

Me: Listen, this isn’t going to solve anything.

Mel: It’ll solve my problem.

Vince: I don’t want to die!!!!!!!!!!

Me: Listen, this is all a misunderstanding. I’m sure we can all talk thin thing out.

Mel: Misunderstanding? I misunderstood when I thought I saw my wife stick a vibrator up that guy’s ass?

Me: What?!?!? SICK!!!

I promptly threw Vince off of me and he landed on the ground at Mel’s feet.

Me: That’s just gross. Fucking shoot him already!!

Mel: That’s what I wanted to hear.

Wait, what had I done? I quickly stepped between them again.

Me: On second thought - - Listen, here’s the thing. . . . You’re actually gonna laugh . . .

Mel: Laugh? Laugh at this!!

Mel swung the shotgun like a club, right at my head. I would have likely been struck a direct, crushing blow, had at that moment, Mel’s redneck friend not come flying out of the only unbroken window in the place, striking Mel in the process. Mel stumbled, dropped the shotgun, and fell to his knees. I grabbed the gun, but then Mel grabbed me by the waist and grabbed the shotgun, trying to wrench it free. Then, none other than our friend Triple H, jumped through the same window in true action movie form, wearing only a pair of tightey whiteys. No doubt about it, he was mad. Mel’s eyes went wide.

Triple H: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mel: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Triple H grabbed Mel and threw him into a wall of the store. Mel tried to escape into the store itself. Triple H was hot on his heels.

Mel: I don’t get it!!! I beat the crap out of you!!!!

Triple H: I WON’T SELL FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Triple H then promptly hooked Mel’s arms and delivered a Pedigree, right there on the store floor. The chaos was over. I stood there, the only person who was both conscious AND dressed, and surveyed the carnage. More importantly, it occurred to me that I had almost been responsible for the death of Vince McMahon. True, he had been naked and clinging to me when I learned he was into anal play, but still. He did not deserve to die just because of that. Well, maybe not anyway. I would have to think about that one later.

The fat woman emerged from the back. Also stark raving naked. I shielded my eyes.

Fat Woman: Mel?!?!

Triple H: Okay, lady, let’s pick up where we left off.

Fat Woman: What?!?! After what you did to my husband? Get out! Get out!!

Triple H: Don’t forget I get free tuxes!

Fat Woman: Like hell!

Triple H: YOU PROMISED!!!!

Fat Woman: That was before you did all of this!! Get out!! Get out!!

The fat woman proceeded to pick up one of the shotguns and start firing.

Me: Oh shit!!!

Triple H: WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE OR WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!

Vince: Hop in my car!!

We all piled in. A shotgun slug took out the back window, spraying glass all over me as we peeled off.

Triple H: Whew!! That was close!!!

Vince: Close?? CLOSE?!? It was CLOSER THAN CLOSE!!!! My car has been hit!!

Triple H:Hey Vince, you promised food. Stop at this chicken place up here.

Vince: How can you think about - - -

Triple H: FAT CHICKS MAKE ME HUNGRY!!!

Vince: Good point. Let’s go.

So there we went. And did we ever get some strange looks when we got there – Me and the two naked guys in the shot-out BMW.

[Guest raze0811]

Just a little note to anybody whose been reading this diary:

As I am participating in the EWR Idol contest, I may not continue to have the time to update this diary as often as I have been up until now. I will still try to provide an update at least two or three times a week, hopefully even get a show up every week. But as long as I advance in EWR Idol my attention will be split and this one may slow down a little bit.

[Guest J_Lethal]

LMAO @ I WONT SELL FOR YOU!!!!!

Golden, You da man Raze. (Not Goldberg:@)

[Ace]

Damn man that was sick. Vince with a vibrator up his.....

[Malenko]

i know you have the diary battles and all but couldn't you post once in a while?

i miss this

[Commander Sheepard]

Well, aside from the fact that the thought of a vibrator up Vince's ANYTHING makes me wanna lose my dinner, that was one darn funny post.

" I WON'T SELL FOR YOU" is going in my sig right now...

[Guest raze0811]

SmackDown! October 22, 2003 – PREVIEW

The fallout from No Mercy begins here!

Last Sunday at No Mercy, in an amazing display of skill and prowess, Kurt Angle bested Brock Lesnar AND The Undertaker in a Triple Threat match to win back the WWE Title. With Survivor Series looming in the very near future, what will the fallout from this epic clash be and how will it effect the title picture at Survivor Series? All three of these men are scheduled to appear on SmackDown, so there are guaranteed to be some answers.

Chris Benoit will NOT be appearing due to injuries sustained at the hands of AJ Styles at No Mercy. How will AJ Styles take this news and what will happen when he steps into the ring against Billy Kidman?

Los Guerreros are also scheduled to appear, and without a doubt they will be looking for payback against Big Show and A-Train who cheated their way to Tag Title glory this past Sunday night?

Confirmed Matches for SmackDown! Live:

AJ Styles vs Billy Kidman

World’s Greatest Tag Team vs APA

Cruiserweight Title Match

Spanky© vs Shannon Moore

Tune in to catch every exciting second of SmackDown!

Edited May 28, 2004 by raze0811

[Guest The Notorious M.I.K.E]

I only have three words for this...

BEST... DIARY... EVER!

[Guest raze0811]

From WWE.com

CHRIS BENOIT - OUT FOR THE COUNT?

Has Chris Benoit wrestled his last match? Currently it is believed by many industry insiders that just may be the case. Doctors have worked with him  daily since his match against AJ Styles at No Mercy, where his back sustained an extraordinary amount of impact in a short span of time.

Chris insists that he will be back in the ring in no time, but his doctors have advised against such a course of action until his exact condition can be better determined.

One of the doctors on the medical team, when questioned, stated that among other things, it was possible that Benoit had sustained damage to his kidneys, although the exact severity has yet to be determined. Benoit is relegated to bed rest at this time.

The injuries came during a match with AJ Styles at the WWE PPV "No Mercy." Benoit fell out of the ring, landing hard on the apron with his lower back taking the brunt of the fall. Benoit's body then bounced from the apron and crashed into the steel steps, with his lower back again taking the brunt of the fall. Seizing the advantage, Styles then proceeded to toss Benoit into the steel post several times, further injuring the back. At this point, Benoit could barely stand, and although he fought valiantly, was unable to win the match. AJ Styles is scheduled to appear on this week's "SmackDown! Live," taking on Billy Kidman. Benoit, however, has not been cleared to wrestle.

Now, all that is left is to wait for more concrete results and hope for the best.

Edited May 31, 2004 by raze0811

[Protoman Version 2.5]

In the words of ron simmons " DAMN!!! " this is one funny diary. I really enjoy how you are slowly going off track from what really happened during that time period and into your own storylines of WWF/E. And the backstage posts are funny as hell, big show and the KFC wanna be place had to be two of the funniest things i've ever read. And the " Laying down? What's laying down? " line was golden. I hope you can keep up the good work, though i think if all the stuff happened to me so far i'd want to kill myself too. :blink:

[Guest J_Lethal]

Triple H: I WON’T SELL FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That deserves a BUMP!!!!!