What's the dumbest thing you ever heard while playing sports?

[Chasing Lamely]

As the title says... what's the dumbest thing you ever heard playing sports?

I may have found the most retarded centre back ever last Sunday. The ref blew him up for a passback thinking he'd shinned it back to his own keeper. He runs up to the ref shouting 'What was that for?' so the ref says 'passback' and - I swear to God - he said "But I used my hand!"

So rather than giving us a 6 yard free kick for the passback, he got sent off, two match ban, sixty quid fine and I scored my eighth goal of the season from the penalty.

Absolute fucking genius.

[The Sultan of Swank]

Playing a Baseball tournie in New York. Only Canadian draw in the tournament field of 16, we decide to play one of our games only in French. While playing at first and chatting with the short stop between plays, I was politely asked by a baserunner to "Quit speakin' that nigger mexican bullshit!"

We crushed the inferior American team 11-3.

[Toe]

Did you tell him to fuck off in French?

[Guest Tequilla Rockin' Bird]

I fouled an opposing defender in his own box once and he tried to claim a penalty for his team.

[Guest Anti-Hero]

I was right near a punch-up on the rugby field when the two guys were pulled apart, and the guy from the opposition called my teammate an "Assclown". It was one of those weird situations where I wanted to call someone a retard, but then realised that I'd be acknowledging that I knew where he stole that "gem" of an insult from. Classic self-loathing

[NobBe Nobbs]

I've had one guy protest that he couldn't have tackled me illegally because he was on my team in a non-serious American football game thing, another ask where the goal was during hockey practice and a third claim that he didn't need a facemask because he was "hardcore". We proved him wrong pretty quickly by firing pucks high and making him curl up into a ball.

[Lowerdeck]

Dumbest thing I heard while playing sports.

Freshman year of HS, I was on the golf team. I was the #6 man and wasn't really counted for scoring purposes (thank God). And then the #5 man quit the team in the middle of a round, crying like a bitch because his girlfriend broke up with him.

I started the rest of that season.

[GhostMachine]

I was playing baseball in middle school (gym class), and was playing 2nd base - I usually played center field or left field when we played baseball in gym class - player for the other team hits the ball, then after he is tagged out at first, tries to say he was safe because the 1st baseman wasn't touching the bag. Would have been a decent argument, if not for the fact that the 1st baseman had his right foot smack dab in the middle of 1st base when he tagged him.

(Lucky for him I wasn't pitching, because I would have intentionally hit him next time he came to bat just for trying to pull that shit or being that damned stupid)

[gunnar hendershow]

Back when I wrestled one of my teammates lost to a girl, she ended up winning the whole tournament at the weight class (130 I think). So obviously she was very good. But my teammate, instead of taking it like a man and accepting that girls can be monsters too he decidced to come up with all these excuses in our team's section. Nobody even brought it up that he lost to a girl, only that he lost a match and that in and of itself is tough.