The 2008 Scummy Awards - The AWARDS Thread!

[Sousa]

Well, it's been a month and a half.

So better late than never, I guess?

With no further delay, Sousa presents...

The 2008

SCUMMY

AWARDS!

hosted by

DANCING HUGH JACKMAN!

Let's start things out with the Individual Superlative Awards for Sucking! New awards will be posted all day today, so WATCH THIS SPACE!

Altogether, 18 people voted. However, not everyone voted in every category, and there are thus some numerical inconsistencies. But fuck it, here we go anyway!

WORST FAKE CLAIM IN A MAFIA GAME:

With 7 votes in second place...

Pleatherface claims Chris Benoit, WWE Mafia by Jam!

...which means that, in first place, with 8 votes...

Pleatherface claims Sandman, Jobber Mafia II by Sousa!

A terrible, horribly stupid ploy. Apparently, everyone figured that because I stupidly included Roxxi Laveaux in the first Jobber Mafia mere moments before her inexplicable push, anyone who's ever lost a wrestling match was suddenly fair game to job to the big boys. No such luck here, and the town saw right through Pleather's stupid fake claim, nailing another student of the evil Parts Unknown Championship Wrestling development territory.

WORST SCUM PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

Ladies and gentlemen... WE HAVE A TIE!

With 9 votes apiece, our co-winners are...

Momo as Several Lernean Hydra Heads, Mythology Mafia by Norro

AND

Huss Delgado as Colonel Roderick Decker, A-Team Mafia by Josh-oo-wuh!

Each performance here is uniquely bad in its own right. Momo's blisteringly bad defense of the scum Ruki on Day One sealed his fate early, and his inexplicable turn to voting toward Ruki when the chips were down only sealed his fate as Ruki's vile head-mate. As for Huss? Huss claimed to be Military-Aligned in an A-Team game. Yeeeeah...

WORST TOWNIE PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

With 3 votes in third place...

Blaze as Erik Watts, Jobber Mafia II by Sousa!

And in second place with 4 votes...

D-Extreme as Roxxi Laveaux, Jobber Mafia I by Sousa!

And our woeful winner, with 9 votes...

Huss Delgado as Mr. Game & Watch, Super Smash Bros. Mafia by Ruki!

How do you stand out among such a group of horrid standouts? How about by taking a suspicious player at his word in the endgame, allowing the town to blow through the critical lynch-or-lose last day before anyone else in the game had a chance to contribute? How about casting your vote for a confirmed townie teammate who happens to have a double vote, allowing the last members of the Evil Newbies Mafia to pile on and win? I'd say that'd be a start.

WORST PLAYER OF 2008:

But who stands out above all? Two wretched performances by Huss Delgado take home the Worst Scum and Worst Townie performances... but he's not the worst of the year. WHO IS IT!?

In third place with 2 votes... Slogger!

In second place with 5 votes... Krone!

And taking home the top prize, the worst of the worst, with 11 votes...

MasterOfPain!

MoP can do it all. He can blindly follow a bandwagon. He can allow scum players to lead him by the nuts straight into the abyss. He can make horrid claims that make him stand out like a sore thumb as scum. He can make banal joke posts that can turn an entire game against him. This, folks, is the total package of bad play, and our condolences to him.

I'd love to read his response, but I have him on Ignore and he's probably still banned.

COMING UP AFTER THE BREAK: The Group Superlative Awards for Sucking, plus a performance by Counting Crows!

[Guest Mr. Plow]

C'MON C'MON

MOVE A LITTLE FASTER

C'MON C'MON

THE WORLD WILL FOLLOW AFTER

C'MON C'MON

CUZ EVERYBODY'S AFTER

LOVE

[Sousa]

ACCIDENTALLY IN LOOOOOOOOVE

WORST TOWN PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

In fourth place with 2 votes... Jobber Mafia I by Sousa!

In third place with 4 votes... Marvel: Civil War Mafia by Will!

In second place with 5 votes... Super Smash Bros. Mafia by Ruki!

And with 7 votes... who else could win but...

The Devil's Rejects Mafia by Essa!

All glory to RW for a sterling performance, but it'd be difficult to give him sole credit for a great performance without acknowledging the sheep-like town that hung on his every word as "investigator"--even when his results steered them wrong time and time again. RW's cop claim helped him exploit the backbiting and mistrust that plagued this particular game, and the town fucked itself over while the Mafia sat back and laughed for an easy victory.

WORST MAFIA PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

In second place with 6 votes... The Lernean Hydra Mafia, Mythology Mafia by Norro!

But even that awful performance couldn't touch our winner, with 10 votes...

The McMahon Logging Company, Jobber Mafia III by Sousa!

MEG came into J-Maf 3 with a bit of a swagger. With two previous Jobber Mafia victories under his belt, he seemed to think he was invincible coming in. Of course, all that changed when he found himself under suspicion on Night Zero... then came to face the wrath of the Ultimate Warrior that very same night. From there, it all fell apart between survivors 9 to 5 and Will, as they successfully managed to kill exactly zero people between them, remained on the town's radar the entire game, and ultimately floundered away into nothingness en route to a town victory. Seriously, MEG. Dreadful.

WORST GM:

In second place with 3 votes... Pleatherface!

And your runaway winner, with fourteen votes...

Visionary!

Sure, a case could be made for Pleather as a more consistent failure--his games never get off the ground, petering off literally from the start. But when you put together the clusterfuck known as Scrubs Mafia, with its labyrinthine win conditions and baffling interlocked roles, and then have the gall to tell living players that if they can't win then tough titties... well, you've failed pretty badly, haven't you?

WORST GAME:

Once again, our second-place winner comes out with 3 votes, and it's Individual Mafia by Kryptonite3D!

And once again winning with 14 votes...

Scrubs Mafia by Visionary!

Seriously, I just told you this game sucked. Here it is again. BUT NOW, THE BIG QUESTION...

WORST ROLE:

WHICH SCRUBS MAFIA ROLE WILL WIN?

WILL RUSSO PULL IT OFF!?

WILL VISIONARY GET THE THREEPEAT?

In fourth place with 1 vote... Dr. Keith from Scrubs Mafia by Visionary!

In third place with 3 votes... Elliot from Scrubs Mafia by Visionary!

In second place...

with 5 votes...

...VINCE RUSSO FROM WCW 2000 MAFIA BY DUKES OH MY GOD VISIONARY PULLS IT OFF!

WITH 10 VOTES! YOUR WINNER IS...

The Guy Who Changed Everyone's Allegiances Around from Scrubs Mafia by Visionary!

To this day, we still don't know what did it. But halfway through Scrubs Mafia... everything suddenly turned on its ear. Two Mafia members were suddenly Town-aligned, guaranteeing their ability to pick the Mafia apart and almost assuring a town victory. How could it happen? Who could've done such a thing?

Visionary hasn't been seen in nearly three months... so the world may never know.

COMING UP NEXT: The Minor Individual Awards, plus the Rashid Memorial Lifetime Achievement Award doesn't start existing!

[Mr Evil Guy]

WORST MAFIA PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

In second place with 6 votes... The Lernean Hydra Mafia, Mythology Mafia by Norro!

But even that awful performance couldn't touch our winner, with 10 votes...

The McMahon Logging Company, Jobber Mafia III by Sousa!

MEG came into J-Maf 3 with a bit of a swagger. With two previous Jobber Mafia victories under his belt, he seemed to think he was invincible coming in. Of course, all that changed when he found himself under suspicion on Night Zero... then came to face the wrath of the Ultimate Warrior that very same night. From there, it all fell apart between survivors 9 to 5 and Will, as they successfully managed to kill exactly zero people between them, remained on the town's radar the entire game, and ultimately floundered away into nothingness en route to a town victory. Seriously, MEG. Dreadful.

I died the first night, I wasn't even alive long enough to have a shitty performance. :/

Also, when investigated I turned out town. I was trying to bait investigators to clear me so I could be cleared throughout the game. It's not my fault that after I died both my mafia mates fucked off and posted like 3 times between them. And RW was gonna kill me regardless so there was nothing I could do.

That is my defense on why I didn't particular play as shitty as the others.

EDIT: I did play pretty shit though, for a first night exit.

Edited February 28, 2009 by Mr. Evil Guy

[Sousa]

We're back with the Minor Individual Player Awards!

BEST NEWBIE:

In a close second with 7 votes... YoungB!

And in first, with 9... who else could it be but...

Split Second!

Seriously, Split's a newbie? He's been playing longer than I have for fuck's sake. Still, Split's been a standout performer even when people haven't been paying attention to his performances, and we're better in the Mafia Cube to have him around.

MOST UNDERRATED:

In third place with 3 votes... C-MIL!

In second place with 5 votes... Hajjhowe!

And your winner, with 10 total votes...

TheRossWalker!

No major surprises here--Ross is always a dark horse, very rarely a nightkill target, but effective when he gets his head fully in the game. He knows how to play both townie and scum effectively, and he's present with a keen observation from time to time. Not really a force to be reckoned with, but a towering dark horse notwithstanding.

MOST IMPROVED:

In third place with 4 votes... Ruki!

In second place with 6 votes... Gamemaster!

And pulling off the surprise victory with 8 votes is none other than...

Pleatherface!

Pleather's come a long way since he was a town player who came up with a fake claim for some reason. Now, he can make logical conclusions as a townie, and he can baffle the town with bullshit as scum--he did it in Jobber Mafia 2 until pressed, and he just now did it in Marvel Comics Mafia as well. Pleather may never be regarded as a top player... but I'm sure sometimes, he wouldn't have it any other way.

BEST FAKE CLAIM:

In a VERY CLOSE second place with 8 votes... Pleatherface claims Vince McMahon, WWF 1999 Mafia by Rabid Wolverine!

...which means that our winner, with 9 votes, must be...

GoGo Yubari claims Typeface, Marvel: Civil War Mafia by Will!

Add another notch to GoGo's win belt. From the moment he entered Marvel Civil War a-gimmick-postin' away, the town bought every word of it... hook, line, and sinker. Seriously, I died early and replaced a scum player later, and even I didn't believe it. The don GoGo, with no safe claim given, managed to pull the wool over everyone's eyes, leading his monstrous Pro-Registration mafia to a relatively easy victory.

BEST SCUM PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

In second place, with 1 vote... Josh-oo-wuh as Brodie Lee, CHIKARA Mafia by FlatDoughnut!

And, of course, your winner and STILL scum heavyweight champeen...

Sousa as Wheat Germ, Food Mafia by Ruki!

...or else the far more obvious

Rabid Wolverine as Baby Firefly, The Devil's Reject Mafia by Essa!

Seriously, this was a positively sick performance. Despite being an investigator who returned virtually zero anti-Mafia results, the town only started to suspect his play near the end, and even then it wasn't enough for them to believe that their precious RW--WHO HAD CLAIMED COP SO HE MUST BE TOWN GUYS--was working against them. By needling the town into a frenzy, RW was able to keep his scum buddies under the radar, handing his Mafia faction the victory.

BEST TOWNIE PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

Can RW pull off the double-win?

It's a close one, folks.

In fourth place with 2 votes... LittleDaniel as Tohya Miho, Web Comic Mafia III by Norro!

In third place with 3 votes... FlatDoughnut as Norman Smiley, Jobber Mafia II by Sousa!

In second place...

with 6 votes...

...LCS as Kane, WWF Invasion Mafia by Rabid Wolverine!

YES! THAT'S RIGHT! IN FIRST PLACE, WITH 7 POINTS, IT'S...

Rabid Wolverine as Achelous, Mythology Mafia by Norro!

Sure, LCS did it without the benefit of Jesus Investigation Powers. But when Mythology Mafia started to wind down and RW seized the reins as ubercop, the Titans didn't stand a chance. Combining some top-quality investigation choices with a real sense of leadership, RW was the clear MVP of the tl;dr classics-wank-fest that was Mythology Mafia, helping a huge amount of townies take home the gold.

COMING UP NEXT: The Minor GM/Game Awards, plus a touching tribute to Beeker!

[GoGo Yubari]

Yessssss! One more for the Winnin' Guy! That's going in my sig.

[Jimmy]

Woot. Best Newbie

[Your Mom]

That Vince claim was my idea! Gogo stole my award!

[GoGo Yubari]

Not really. If Pleather had won, then he would have stolen your award. Will you B serious, JHS?

[thuganomic]

Wow. I just noticed your sig for the first time. I don't know whether to be impressed or to laugh. >_>

[GoGo Yubari]

Both.

[Your Mom]

Not really. If Pleather had won, then he would have stolen your award. Will you B serious, JHS?

I just wanted someone to love me

[Sousa]

What's that? MORE awards?

BEST ROLE:

It's our SECOND tie of the game!

With 8 votes apiece, your co-winners are...

The Cardboard Tube Samurai, Web Comic Mafia III by Norro

AND

Big Josh/Doink the Clown, Jobber Mafia III by Sousa!

Proving that three is the magic number, Norro and I meet in the field of battle and prove that samurai and lumberjacks are equally matched. Norro's CTS (played by GoGo) could enter an Honorable Duel with his foe, providing a number of effects cumulative with his time spent meditating. Big Josh (played by Will) started as a standard goon for the McMahon Logging Company, but if he outlasted his Mafia teammates (he did!), he would become Doink, a serial killer whose victims all also appeared to be Doink. Risks both ways with great reward, these two roles are the reason why I let Ruki off the hook for having a Jesus blue mage in his game. At least he tried. A lot of people don't.

BEST MAFIA PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

In third place with 2 votes... The Evil Newbie Mafia, Super Smash Bros. Mafia by Ruki!

In second place with 4 votes... The Mafia, Traditional Mafia IV by The Evil Overlord!

And with a towering victory at 12 votes, the best Mafia of 2008 was...

The Corporation, WWF 1999 Mafia by Rabid Wolverine!

Certainly, one would expect a Mafia with such a sterling performance to be stacked. But think again: the group was stokerino, Ruki, Srar, Pleather, and TGC, with Katsuya as a late convert. Decent players all, but... best scum performance of the year? Really? Absolutely--the Corporation was coordinated, efficient, and full of masterful fakeclaims, sending the town on a witch hunt for the Ministry of Darkness while it quietly disassembled the game along the margins. A tremendous performance, particularly in the pivotal last day.

BEST TOWN PERFORMANCE IN A SINGLE GAME:

A very, very close race here.

In third place, with 5 votes... Traditional Mafia V: Assassins in the Palace!

In second place, with 6 votes... WWF Invasion Mafia by Rabid Wolverine!

And your very narrow winner, with 7 votes...

Mythology Mafia by Norro!

Sure, there were a few dry spells in the middle. But when the chips were down and things were rolling, the gods nailed down their foes almost 100% of the time from Hydra-fragging beginning to Titan-flattening end. Seriously, fourteen winners? Does that EVER happen? It happened here.

COMING UP NEXT: YOUR Best Town Player, Best Scum Player, and the 2008 Player of the Year!

Edited February 28, 2009 by Sous Betta Than Kanyon?

[Sousa]

The major Individual Awards are next! Will GoGo get another notch in his belt? Will Pesci and RW rule the day? We'll find out now!

SCUM PLAYER OF THE YEAR:

In third place, with 3 votes that prove he should be up for Most Underrated next year... Rabid Wolverine!

In second place, with 4 votes... Mr. Potato Head!

And the very natural Scum Player of the Year, with 11 votes and probably nearly as many scum victories...

Mr. Evil Guy!

There's a reason they call him Evil, folks; nobody on EWB plays a better scum game. He knows when to fake claim, when to lie back and wait, and when to grab the town by the jewels and seize control of the whole game (see Jobber Mafia I and Super Smash Bros. Mafia). He builds alliances, draws suspicion away from himself, and bends newbies to his whim. And he does all this by largely playing the exact same way when he plays as town. He is Machiavelli on horse steroids, and I fear him.

TOWN PLAYER OF THE YEAR:

In second place, with 7 votes...

...Rabid Wolverine!

Your 2008 Town Player of the Year is, with 11 votes...

Pesci!

One of the consequences of being good is that you always seem to die off on Night One. Pesci... always seems to die off on Night One, even when he's contributed little or has a worthless ability. That's because a town Pesci likes to watch the scum build its argument like a flimsy house of cards moments before being a prick and blowing it right over. He's the enemy of scum bandwagon leaders in particular, and he's not afraid to call people out while at the same time knowing exactly when to pull back and call off the dogs. He's everything you want on your side if you're town and your worst nightmare if you're scum.

THE 2008 PLAYER OF THE YEAR:

In third place!

With 1 vote!

...Josh-oo-wuh!

IN SECOND PLACE...

...WITH 7 VOTES...

...GOGO YUBARI!

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WITH 10 VOTES, YOUR PLAYER OF THE YEAR IS

PESCI!

I'm not kissing his ass again. I just did it. Pesci's tremendous, though, and worst of all is that he's the same when he's scum or town. It doesn't matter what side you're on; if it's Pesci's side, you're in pretty good shape.

So big congratulations go to Pesci, your 2008 Player of the Year!

COMING UP NEXT: The Major Game Awards, including the 2008 Mafia Game of the Year!

[GoGo Yubari]

To be honest I'm astonished that seven people voted for me.

[Sousa]

Let's close it up!

GM OF THE YEAR:

In third place, with 3 votes... C-MIL!

In second place, with 5 votes... Rabid Wolverine!

And your very flattered winner, with 10 votes total... it's...

:w00t: SOUSA! :w00t:

My thanks to the lot of you. I'm flattered to be the top of a very excellent field. Big props to C-MIL and RW for running some incredible games this year.

BEST TRADITIONAL GAME:

In fourth place, with 2 votes... 12 Angry Men: A Mafia Roleplaying Experiment by Josh-oo-wuh!

Tied at second place with 3 votes apiece... it's Traditional Mafias III and IV by The Evil Overlord!

And that can only mean that, with 8 votes, the Best Traditional Game of 2008 was...

Whose Mafia Is It Anyway? by Mr. Potato Head!

Taking a cue from Ruki's baffling Random Rules Mafia, MPH refines the concept to ensure that everyone can actually participate without worrying about being killed for not counting syllables. In this respect, he turns in a game that's always chaotic, always unpredictable, but never boring to both outside observers and players. It was chaos, but it was controlled chaos, and it stands head and shoulders above other "RULEZ" games that have been overrunning the Mafia Cube of late.

BEST THEME GAME:

In third place, with 2 votes... DC Mafia: Metropolis by thug!

In second place, with 5 votes... Web Comic Mafia III by Norro!

And, not surprisingly, the Best Theme Game of 2008 is...

Saved by the Bell Mafia by C-MIL!

And rightfully so damn it. In my year or so playing Mafia on EWB, I've never seen a game so accurately capture the spirit, the style, and the sense of humor of the source material like this one. With an inventive "win before the end of the school day" mechanic that played out perfectly in the game, supplemented by appropriate abilities, C-MIL brought his trademark humor and attention to detail to every moment in Saved by the Bell Mafia.

THE 2008 GAME OF THE YEAR

...but can he take home the top prize?

Is thug super enough to claim it?

Will the jobbers pull off the upset?

Did RW invade our hearts?

Or did RW just *WWF '99* with our very souls?

Let's find out... in the closest race of the entire 2008 Scummy Awards.

In fifth place, with 2 votes each... DC Mafia: Metropolis by thug and WWF Invasion Mafia by Rabid Wolverine!

In third place... we have another tie.

With 4 votes apiece...

...WWF 1999 Mafia by Rabid Wolverine...

...and...

...Saved by the Bell Mafia by C-MIL!

The 2008 Game of the Year is, with 5 votes,...

The Jobber Brigade Mafia III: Last Stand at Parts Unknown by Sousa!

...wow. Holy shit, wow. Thank you to everyone, and incredible congratulations to everyone else up for this award. I don't even know what to say, because I barely even won the damn thing and I was in there with an amazing group. If any of you ever say Mafia is dead on EWB, you only need to look at the games in this category to know that there is ALWAYS room for a good, fun Mafia game on EWB.

That's it! Good night, everyone!

Edited March 1, 2009 by Sous Betta Than Kanyon?

[Pesci]

Awesome! I thought I'd win Best Player but RW was kicking my ass in the Best Townie voting in the thread if I remember rightly. Guess I have all those PM voters to thank. I won't even be in the running this year though.

[Your Mom]

I got something! *runs off with award leaving all Corporation team members in the dust*

[stokeriño]

I won a Mafia award?

A Mafia award?

What in the fuck?

[Jimmy]

You did?