Football Manager 2012

[Hobo]

It's only cheating if you're doing it on purpose! And to gain an advantage.

If anything this is disadvantaging me!

[new_era]

I'm sure it has been asked before but has anybody got/playing the handheld version?

I downloaded it on Friday for my iPhone 4s as it was only £2.99 and I generally can't get enough of it.

[stokeriño]

Although I am saddened by FM handheld's current lack of availability on the Android platform, it didn't even come close to tempting me to consider spending money on an Apple product.

I did have an older version on the PSP ages ago, though. Decent fun to be had.

[NobBe Nobbs]

After having Adebayor on the brink of re-signing with us, as you may remember from before I bailed on the deal and instead added Goran Pandev and Oscar Cardozo. Cardozo has been solid but not the droids I thought he'd be. Pandev has been wonderful.

So they were not the droids you were looking for?

I have no idea why, but "...but not the droids I thought he'd be" is fucking cracking me up.

[Liam]

After having Adebayor on the brink of re-signing with us, as you may remember from before I bailed on the deal and instead added Goran Pandev and Oscar Cardozo. Cardozo has been solid but not the droids I thought he'd be. Pandev has been wonderful.

So they were not the droids you were looking for?

I have no idea why, but "...but not the droids I thought he'd be" is fucking cracking me up.

Because you are a geek who only had his penis touched for the first time within the past few years?

Just throwing it out there....

[TheTruth]

Is there a tutorial out there somewhere which helps explain what a poacher, attacking winger, etc. are, and the attributes which are most beneficial in these roles? I don't follow football really, and it'd help out a lot as I'm pretty clueless.

[Guest mr. potato head]

To explain what they are, there are descriptions if you set them via the Player Instructions screen. Which attributes to look at are in there as well I believe.

[Hobo]

Doesn't it tell you on the player instructions screen?

[TheTruth]

It does? Sorry, I haven't bought this as of yet and din't want to unless I had some clue as to what I was doing. Thanks for your help.

[Gazz]

Is there a tutorial out there somewhere which helps explain what a poacher, attacking winger, etc. are, and the attributes which are most beneficial in these roles? I don't follow football really, and it'd help out a lot as I'm pretty clueless.

View key attributes is your friend.

Also, on 'reports', it'll tell you what role the player is best suited to.

[stokeriño]

Is it just me, or do half the striker roles just suck balls, and you're often better off making the guy a poacher even if they say he sucks at it?

Also, I hate scouted reports where you can only get details of how good they are in one position. "YES I KNOW HE'S BEST AS A DEFENSIVE MIDFIELDER BUT I WANT TO SEE HOW GOOD A RIGHT-BACK HE'D BE."

Sigh.

[Plubby]

Also, I hate scouted reports where you can only get details of how good they are in one position. "YES I KNOW HE'S BEST AS A DEFENSIVE MIDFIELDER BUT I WANT TO SEE HOW GOOD A RIGHT-BACK HE'D BE."

Oh god this.

------

My game.

So it all came down to the last day. I needed a win, and both Liverpool and Man City to NOT win. I put Nottingham Forest away 2-0. Sunderland had Liverpool down 2-0 as well, and a goal to each of Chelsea and Man City in the first ten minutes had me clinging to fourth place. Things were looking good when I made my final sub on 80 minutes.

I check the scores after the game... MAN CITY SCORED IN THE 86th MINUTE So I missed out on the Champions League despite losing in the semifinals.

In the offseason the Barca job became available. I went for it, then for some reason I talked to the media about it (I didn't press a button). The board threatened me, I apologised and got to keep my job. The fans wanted my head. ("Reece out! Reece out!") Mancini got the Barca job. I went Man City and resigned, then applied. Then the guy who replaced Dalglish at Liverpool got that. I went Liverpool!

The Malaga (Spanish League) manager got that. I went :\ Malaga. Then noticed they finished fourth last season. I went Malaga!

They hired some other unemployed guy.

I went two months without a job.

Now I'm at Union Berlin of the German second division.

That sound you hear is a career nosedive

[stokeriño]

You won't have talked to the media about the Barca job yourself - some swine will have leaked it to the tabloids with direct quotes.

[NobBe Nobbs]

After having Adebayor on the brink of re-signing with us, as you may remember from before I bailed on the deal and instead added Goran Pandev and Oscar Cardozo. Cardozo has been solid but not the droids I thought he'd be. Pandev has been wonderful.

So they were not the droids you were looking for?

I have no idea why, but "...but not the droids I thought he'd be" is fucking cracking me up.

Because you are a geek who only had his penis touched for the first time within the past few years?

Just throwing it out there....

Harsh. It wasn't even the Star Wars thing, just the sentence construction that was doing it.

[Plubby]

"Not the droids you're looking for" is a quote with such flexibility You can construct it any way you like to imply unfulfilled expectations. It's a modular sentence!

*nods enthusiastically*

[Hobo]

One game to go in the regular season. The late surge for the Supporters Shield has come to naught because we lost and drew against DC and NY which was followed by Columbus (who are on a quite staggering run of 15 games unbeaten after a pretty horrible first half of the season) and Portland getting a head of us in the overall standings. I wasn't aiming to win it either so it's nice to be in contention and will finish the highest Vancouver have ever finished in the MLS.

We have qualified automatically for the play offs when I was just aiming to finish at most fourth and grab a wildcard spot. Which is nice. Again, I'm not aiming to win it because I wasn't expecting it so doing well at all will be a nice bonus.

[Cactus Drags]

I haven't read anything anywhere, but I seriously hope they do a version of this for the Vita, what with the touch screen and everything.

[Plubby]

Had to retire and start over botched my game pretty bad.

[stokeriño]

Bad enough to retire? That's pretty bad.

[hugobomb]

He found the little known 'Get sent to prision for tax evasion' feature