38 Remakes Coming Soon

[tristy]

The Thing? Fame? Footloose? Akira? Just some of the names being raided once more by a Hollywood system that's fast running out of ideas. We’ve already pointed out recently 30 sequels that were in the works in the factories of Hollywood – but how about remakes? Cast your eyes over this little lot, and prepare to be depressed…

The Shadow

Presumably this a reboot of the hilarious-but-iffy Alec Baldwin non-franchise of the mid-90s. Sam Raimi is producing, and the project is at the screenplay stage right now. Expect a release no sooner than 2010.

Battle Royale

The brilliant, brilliant, brilliant Asian movie is getting a Western remake. Producer Neal H Moritz is currently attached to the project, which has been optioned but not yet got much further. It didn’t help that New Line was linked with funding the film, and the same New Line got swallowed up by Warner Bros totally the other week.

Starfighter

A planned remake of the 1984 movie The Last Starfighter, which remains popular today. Nick Castle is currently attached to direct the project (he did the original as well, although his biggest hit as director is the 1993 kids’ movie Dennis). We fear this one may get lost in development hell. Hope not.

The Evil Dead

Sam Raimi is attached to the remake of one of his most loved films, with both he and Bruce Campbell on producing duties. Set for release at some point next year, they’ll have to get their skates on, as there’s no sign of cameras being turned on just yet.

Knight Rider

Forget the recent TV rebooting, the Weinstein Company has the option to produce a feature film, and the original creator of Knight Rider – Glen A Larson – is hard at work on the screenplay. Expect a release around 2010/11. If the new TV version doesn’t kill the franchise stone dead, of course…

Conan The Barbarian

The script is still being written for the remake of one of Arnie’s best-ever roles. It’s a fair bet that Arnie won’t be returning, but Sahara scribes Thomas Dean Donnelly and Joshua Oppenheimer are beavering away on the screenplay. Production may yet start this year, apparently.

Logan’s Run

Uber-producer Joel Silver is pushing this long-mooted remake, which has director Joseph Kosinski attached (whose name is also being linked with the new Tron film). Logan’s Run is believed to be first in line, though, and a 2010 release is being mooted.

Death Wish

Sylvester Stallone is set to step into the role made famous by Charles Bronson in a remake of Michael Winner’s violent original. Stallone is set to write, produce and star, and production is planned to start at some point this year.

The Taking Of Pelham 123

Tony Scott is directing, and Denzel Washington and John Travolta are starring in a remake of the brilliant 1974 Walter Matthau original. David Koepp has written the screenplay, and the film will be released in the Autumn of 2009.

Fahrenheit 451

Frank Darabont – he of Shawshank Redemption and The Mist fame – has been linked with a fresh take on the Ray Bradbury book for a while. It seems he’s getting closer to honing a script too for him to direct, but it’s still not ready, so no idea of release date. Tom Hanks had been mooted to star.

Friday The 13th

Marcus Nispel – director of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake – has inked his name on the dotted to helm the remake of the original Friday The 13th movie. It’s a great solution: run out of sequels, start at the beginning! It’s in pre-production now for a 2009 release.

Last House On The Left

A remake of the brutal 70s Wes Craven movie, this time it’s relative-newcomer Dennis Illiadis in the director’s chair. The cast is rumoured to feature Liv Tyler, along with Monica Potter, Garret Dillahunt and Tony Goldwyn. It’s due to start filming next month,

Hellraiser

They’ve given up making sequels, so now they’re remaking the 80s original. No sign of Doug Bradley as Pinhead, but Clive Barker has been involved with the script, and Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury will be making their English language directorial debuts with the project.

Tron

Will it be a sequel? Will it be a remake? Will they call it a ‘reimagining’? All these questions and more are set to be answered, as three decades on, Tron will be heading back to the big screen in 2010.

Clash of the Titans

The 1981 film is being remade, and Stephen Norrington has – after not being seen behind a camera since League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen – agreed to direct. He did the original Blade, too. Lawrence Kasdan has been penning the script, and the film is in pre-production for a 2010 release.

Akira

A live action version of the iconic anime film of the same name, the adaptation is believe to be being handled in two parts, and Leonardo DiCaprio has been linked with the project. It’s still at the scripting stage, although director Ruairi Robinson is attached to helm.

The Birds

How depressing. Hitchcock’s awesome thriller is getting the remake treatment, with Martin ‘Casino Royale’ Campbell rumoured to be directing, and Naomi Watts linked with the project too. It has a release date of July 2009.

Frankenweenie

Tim Burton’s terrific early short film is being brought to the big screen by… Tim Burton! There’s logic there, somewhere. December 2009 is the targeted release time.

A Nightmare On Elm Street

Hurray! That ‘reimagining’ word is being used to describe the now-in-the-pre-production stages new Elm Street movie. Michael Bay produces, but doesn’t direct. Thank goodness.

Westworld

The terrific forerunner to Jurassic Park – also penned by Michael Crichton – Westworld has long been mooted for a remake. Billy Ray, who directed Breach and Shattered Glass, is the latest writer to take a stab at the theme-park-attraction-goes-out-of-control concept.

The Warriors

Director Tony Scott – once he’s finished on The Taking Of Pelham 123 - remains attached to the proposed remake of Walter Hill’s 1979 classic tale of rival gangs on a mission that takes them across a dangerous city. It’s still in the writing stages, and may be held up in development hell for some time yet.

Piranha

Alexandra Aja, who enjoyed success with his remake of The Hills Have Eyes, is directing a potentially 3D version of Joe Dante’s terrific original. A 2009 release date has been eyed up.

Escape From New York

Another John Carpenter classic is getting remade, and Terminator 3 director Jonathan Mostow – with Ken Nolan - is taking a stab at the script. No word if he’s going to direct, but a 2009 release is mooted.

Meatballs

Another 80s comedy getting a remake, Meatballs has – oh dear – Big Momma’s House 2 (not even the original!) director John Whitesell attached to it. And no sign of Bill Murray, either. Never a good thing.

Howard Stern’s Porkys

A remake of Bob Clark’s bawdy early 80s comedy, this is still in the planning stages with US shock-jock lending his name to the project and the title. It’s planned to have it ready for 2009. Expect an array of shitty sequels if it hits.

The Lives Of Others

The stunning German film is getting an American remake, with Anthony Minghella attached to produce, but not direct. It’s only been optioned so far, so 2010 would be the earliest you see it. Our advice? See the original. It’s genuinely stunning.

Short Circuit

Number Five is, er, still alive, with original screenwriters coming back for the reboot of the 80s original. No news of a finished script, director or shooting date, though.

Straw Dogs

Rod Lurie – the man who directed The Contender – is scripting and directing the remake of the Dustin Hoffman-starring original. It’s only been optioned thus far, and so the planned 2009 release date may be optimistic.

1984

Tim Robbins is apparently hunting for the money for a new big screen adaptation of George Orwell’s classic and never-more-relevant novel. He’s not having much luck though, we’re led to believe.

Red Sonja

Roy Thomas (Conan The Destroyer) has been drafted in to write a screenplay for a new Red Sonja film, although don’t expect Arnie to be in it. Nor should you expect it soon.

The Dirty Dozen

Alias veteran Josh Applebaum has the unenviable task of coming up with a suitable script for the remake of the original classic. 2010 is the earliest it’ll be released.

Footloose

Surely not? The 80s musical could be coming back to life if director Kenny Ortega has anything to do with it. That said, given he directed High School Musical and its spin-offs, he’d probably be allowed to do anything he wanted in Hollywood right now. Sigh. Footloose has thus far been optioned, and may go before the camera this year.

Dune

Frank Herbert’s source material is set to be mined again, for a new movie due out in 2010. Peter Berg, who directed the brilliant Friday Night Lights movie, is waving the megaphone, but further details are still sketchy.

The Thing

A remake of the 1982 classic, that’s got Battlestar Galactica producer Ronald D Moore attached to it. That said, it’s being described as a companion rather than a remake. Hmmmm. No word on it going before the cameras yet.

Near Dark

Kathryn Bigelow’s 1987 vampire flick enters the remake chamber, with music video director Samuel Bayer making his debut in the directors’ chair on the film. Cast has yet to be announced, but it appears that Bigelow has had a hand in the screenplay.

The Swarm

This is more like it! Lots of bees! Frank Schaetzing’s book is plundered again for the big screen, with Silence Of The Lambs adapter Ted Tally on scripting duties. No director or cast yet, though.

Fame

Alan Parker’s 1980 musical is being remade by MGM, who originally had a Christmas 2008 release date inked in. Andy Finkman – who directed The Game Plan and She’s The Man – is down to direct, though, and the project will no doubt move forward shortly.

The Witches

Roald Dahl’s book has already been filmed with Anjelica Huston in the leading role, but Guillermo Del Toro is toying with the idea of having a stab himself. No start date has been announced for the project, though.

The one thing that REALLY caught my eye was Akira - basically the only anime, movie or TV show, I can stand - being remade with Leonardo DiCaprio maybe being attatched. Also, a mild interest in a 1984 remake, but I don't want to see Tim Robbins in it. I hate Tim Robbins. Yeah, that's right ROC. I said it!

[PkmnTrainerJ]

April Fools?

[Farmer Reil]

They're remaking Akira? And not as an anime? And with Leonardo DiCaprio in it?

Part of me just died, and the rest is jealous of the dead part.

Edit: As for an April Fools, considering it's only been April for two hours, and is only 6pm on March 31st in the States - where this no doubt came from - I doubt it

Although I really hope it is.

Edited April 1, 2008 by Farmer Reil

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

I've heard of a few of these, so I don't think it's an April Fools' joke.

It's good to see that people are realizing they don't need to keep churning out crappy concepts just for the sake of being original (Baby Geniuses). It's not so good that it's going too far in the other direction, and there aren't that many good movies that AREN'T somehow rehashes.

[Whisper]

Anyone who hates Tim Robbins needs to leave right now and go watch Jacob's Ladder.

[Zaz]

Considering Anthony Minghella got a mention, it would've been written at least two weeks ago, or the writer just has no idea.

[Hellfire]

Hollywood has pretty much run out of ideas, or they are too lazy to think of new ones. Instead of taking random movies from the 80's and making crappy remakes, take a chance and do something else.

[apsham]

You know, a lot of those really don't sound that bad. Although seeing Sly take over for Bronson is just a crime. Unless he grows a mustache for it.

[ROC]

Pfft, I'm not a Tim Robbins fanboy...

*hides copies of Bob Roberts, Bull Durham, and AntiTrust...just for laughs*

[tristy]

WHAT?! No Shawshank? For shame.

[ROC]

WHAT?! No Shawshank? For shame.

It's too redundant to say Shawshank. Plus, I haven't seen it in a good year or so. Plus, that'd be me more being a Morgan Freeman mark than anything.

[Maxx]

Sam Bayer directing a Near Dark remake sounds like a good idea to me. He should get Lance Hendrickson to reprise his role.

[illmatic]

You forgot to add the remake of Korean movies My Sassy Girl and Sympathy For Lady Vengence. Seriously all these remakes make me sad:( Always fucking up good movies.

[GRIFT]

The Shadow

On the one hand you have this character's notorious film flop, and on the other you have a character who ruled radio and was an influential pulp character who helped to shape my all time favorite comic character: Batman. In Raimi's capable hands this could turn into a nice little cult Franchise, afterall this is the character who Raimi tried to get the rights to so many years ago before creating his classic Darkman character as a facsimile.

Battle Royale

I'd love to see this one get a proper Western treatment, though without a hard R this film is hardly worth the effort or recreating it here.

Starfighter

A director re-making his own work? Further, a director re-making his only true great work? I'd pass on this one, but who knows. We might be surprised.

The Evil Dead

My only real problem with Evil Dead getting an update is the suggested lack of Bruce Campbell in the leading role. Bruce Campbell is Ash, and without Campbell Evil Dead just isn't Evil Dead. I wonder if they will go for a more horror based film here? Perhaps making the film that they probably set out to make in college.

Knight Rider

Kit, I am picking up readings of over exposure.

Conan The Barbarian

The role HHH was born to butcher. I hope they go a route that is more loyal to the comics. My dad was a huge Conan comic fan and as such I grew up with a pretty comprehensive Conan library. If they bring that side of the character to life this could be one of the better films listed.

Logan's Run

This film seems to get booted around for the re-make treatment every couple of years. I wouldn't count on seeing anything materialize for a few more years.

Death Wish

Ladies and Gentleman, Sly is going Get Carter the Death Wish series. Coming from someone who thought the most recent Rambo was one of the most satisfying films he'd seen in ages (that film was everything it was supposed to be) I am not expecting much from this. Sly can be Sly. I don't think he can be Charles Bronson.

The Taking Of Pelham 123

I didn't see the original... no comment.

Fahrenheit 451

I didn't really like the original film all that much despite loving the book. I am all for this one.

A Nightmare On Elm Street

Friday The 13th

Last House On The Left

Hellraiser

All of these are hopping onto the success of Halloween's remake and hoping for a rebirth of franchise horror. I didn't like most of these films the first time around, but there is certainly a proven market for them.

Tron

This will be great. Period. I don't care what they do, a new Tron will rock.

Clash of the Titans

I am excited for this one. The first film was alright, and very cutting edge for its time but I think there is a big hole to be filled as far as Greek mythology goes in cinema. Aside from some shaky Hercules productions it is a surprisingly untapped well for cinema to start drawing from.

Akira

This could be tricky, but if it has a star like Leo at the forefront and is treated with uber realism outside of the suspended belief elements it could be a really amazing adaptation.

The Birds

This is the big UGH for me. While Naomi Watts really is like the modern day Tippi Hedron I don't know why they'd update this masterpiece. Outside of getting 'more realistic' birds and special effects there is nothing to be done. The original was one of the finest pieces of cinema ever crafted. To remake this beautifully lyrical film without Hitchcock's watchful eye would surely result in a clunky and shirll work of pseudo suspense.

Frankenweenie

Tim Burton is hit or miss for me. I'd like to see him do something from an original source again. His last several films, hell most of his films, have all been adaptations of some sort.

Westworld

This could be a fun remake. I loved the premise of the original but always thought it could be executed better.

The Warriors

Tony Scott. The Warriors. TONY SCOTT. THE WARRIORS. TONY FUCKING SCOTT MAKING A REMAKE OF THE WARRIORS. That rocks so immensly hard.

Piranha

Didn't see the original.

Escape From New York

This falls under the Evil Dead category for me. Without Kurt Russell is the remake worth seeing?

Short Circuit

Meatballs

Howard Stern's Porkys

Just when I thought they had finished bastardizing pieces of my childhood.

The Lives Of Others

Haven't seen the original. Just added it to the netflix queue though.

Straw Dogs

The original was too good to remake. Can't we leave the masterpieces alone?

1984

Tim Robbins could play a great lead in this film that I think has never been given a proper adaptation from the book.

Red Sonja

Why remake the shitty sequel?

The Dirty Dozen

I could see this one working out if it had the right cast. Clint Eastwood as the lead anyone? I'd love to see a version of this directed by Tarantino. He could finally stop making remakes of movies as his own, and just do a remake.

Footloose

Why?

Dune

I never got into the Dune madness.

The Thing

I loved the original. Kurt Russell is less important to its success than in his previous film on this list.

Near Dark

Yeah, because we need more vampire movies.

The Swarm

It is like the Birds but with BEES! ZOMG~!

Fame

Bah, could care less.

The Witches

Guillermo Del Toro is on fire right now. I don't think this man will do wrong for quite some times.

[Guest Ant]

Whats the point in remakes? They will never be as better than the originals so whats the point?

Fucking hate hollywood sometimes.

[apsham]

Was this the second one, or was there another?

[brenchill]

The Shadow

Thank god. Let's finally put Alec Baldwin's darkest hour or two behind us and have a decent adaption of the classic pulp fiction (Not that pulp fiction) dime novel. I hope a decent director gets attached to it and gives it a 40's style noiristic setting.

The Evil Dead

Is nothing sacred? I can't imagine anybody but Bruce Campbell playing Ash. I don't see how this could benefit from a remake. The original does what it does well, it's horrificly low-budget and that's its charm.

Death Wish

The original is okay but I'm not a huge fan. I can only see Stallone bastardizing the name of Death Wish in a similiar way as he that of Get Carter.

The Taking Of Pelham 123

This one could be good. Tony Scott's a good director and Travolta, Denzel and Gandolfini are great actors. Finally people will get to see exactly where Tarantino stole borrowed ideas from to form Reservoir Dogs. I just hope it doesn't turn into another Ocean's 13 odyssey.

Friday The 13th

It'll be forgotten like the Halloween remake with a bit of luck.

A Nightmare On Elm Street

Michael Bay produces? Jesus christ. Commence shaky cameras, semi-naked girls, shaky cameras, explosions, shaky cameras and more semi-naked girls.

The Warriors

The original is one of my favourite films of all time. I've got great memories of it I first saw it when I was about eight years old and loved it so naturally I'm somewhat reserved about it being remade. But judging by the rumours it's going to be different to the original and much more epic. It's also set in L.A. I'll give it a chance.

Escape From New York

I'm hoping this is going to fall into devolpment hell pretty quickly. It's already had many rewrites, a few different directors attached to it and also, it's star, Gerard Butler has dropped out. I don't mind films from the 40's and 50's that couldn't portray their story correctly due to censoring laws (The Big Sleep and Cape Fear are perfect examples) or the state of soceity during their release, or blockbusters that need be given a modern touch (King Kong) to attract a new audience, it's the remaking of cult classics that annoys me.

Straw Dogs

The original was so shocking for it's time and still holds up well today, so why bother remaking it? It doesn't need remaking. Edward Norton is behind the project (which is possibly going to be renamed "Fear Itsself"). I like Norton but the reason he wants to remake it is ridiculous. He's a "fan" of the original. If you're such a fan, don't bother ruining it.

The Dirty Dozen

I don't know what's worse, A Dirty Dozen remake or the prospect of Tarantino's Inglorious Bastards being released around the same time.

[Pesci]

I'd love to see Robbins play Winston in Nineteen Eighty-Four (what the fuck's 1984? ), he seems the type of guy who could do a good job. Such a fantastic book, there needs to be a better film to do it justice than the old one.

And I'm a big fan of Battle Royale, but I really want an English-language version. It probably won't touch the original, but the concept of it could lead to so many interpretations and I want to see more of them.

Edited April 1, 2008 by Pesci

[Future-Shock]

I'm very on the fence...I love The Warriors, Clash of the Titans, Conan the Barbarian, Red Sonja, Escape From New York and The Evil Dead as they are. I think new technology can do wonders for some of them but I don't know how I would feel about remakes, especially if they stray from teh story and end up sucking.

I guess I just don't want my cult favorites to be remembered as crappy movies because of the remakes....like Roller Ball.

Edited April 2, 2008 by Future-Shock

[GhostMachine]

The Shadow

Thank god. Let's finally put Alec Baldwin's darkest hour or two behind us and have a decent adaption of the classic pulp fiction (Not that pulp fiction) dime novel. I hope a decent director gets attached to it and gives it a 40's style noiristic setting.

Actually, I'd rank Beetlejuice as worse than The Shadow, as far as Alec Baldwin's career goes. I'm a big fan of The Shadow radio shows (I own several tapes of it, including a tape that has an episode from the Australian version of the show) and I thought the movie was tolerable, aside from the miscasting of Penelope Ann Miller as Margot Lane and the crappy thing they did about the Shadow's appearance being illusory or whatever. But I'm certainly looking forward to an all-new movie....provided they do it right.

The Evil Dead

Is nothing sacred? I can't imagine anybody but Bruce Campbell playing Ash. I don't see how this could benefit from a remake. The original does what it does well, it's horrificly low-budget and that's its charm.

Couldn't agree with you more.

Death Wish

The original is okay but I'm not a huge fan. I can only see Stallone bastardizing the name of Death Wish in a similiar way as he that of Get Carter.

The very thought of a remake of a Charles Bronson movie with Stallone in the role almost makes me want to vomit.

The Taking Of Pelham 123

This one could be good. Tony Scott's a good director and Travolta, Denzel and Gandolfini are great actors. Finally people will get to see exactly where Tarantino stole borrowed ideas from to form Reservoir Dogs. I just hope it doesn't turn into another Ocean's 13 odyssey.

Actually, parts of Reservoir Dogs - especially the ending - were also ripped off the Hong Kong movie City on Fire.

Friday The 13th

It'll be forgotten like the Halloween remake with a bit of luck.

I'd rather see a movie that wraps the franchise up once and for all, with Jason getting his final comeuppance and the Jason X movie ignored, thank you very much.

A Nightmare On Elm Street

Michael Bay produces? Jesus christ. Commence shaky cameras, semi-naked girls, shaky cameras, explosions, shaky cameras and more semi-naked girls.

I was completely against this before I ever heard anything about Bay being involved, because just like Bruce Campbell as Ash, I can't see anyone other than Robert Englund as Freddy. Bay being the producer makes it a lot worse.

The Warriors

The original is one of my favourite films of all time. I've got great memories of it I first saw it when I was about eight years old and loved it so naturally I'm somewhat reserved about it being remade. But judging by the rumours it's going to be different to the original and much more epic. It's also set in L.A. I'll give it a chance.

The fact that its not going to be so much of a straight remake is the only reason I'm not against it. I do hope they leave the "Warriors....come out and play-ay!" scene in the script.

Escape From New York

I'm hoping this is going to fall into devolpment hell pretty quickly. It's already had many rewrites, a few different directors attached to it and also, it's star, Gerard Butler has dropped out. I don't mind films from the 40's and 50's that couldn't portray their story correctly due to censoring laws (The Big Sleep and Cape Fear are perfect examples) or the state of soceity during their release, or blockbusters that need be given a modern touch (King Kong) to attract a new audience, it's the remaking of cult classics that annoys me.

Quite frankly, I hope it doesn't happen. The original is a classic (but the sequel is bleech), not just a cult classic, if you ask me. Its my second favorite Kurt Russell movie - Big Trouble In Little China being my favorite. (And its a fucking crime there was never a sequel to Big Trouble)

Straw Dogs

The original was so shocking for it's time and still holds up well today, so why bother remaking it? It doesn't need remaking. Edward Norton is behind the project (which is possibly going to be renamed "Fear Itsself"). I like Norton but the reason he wants to remake it is ridiculous. He's a "fan" of the original. If you're such a fan, don't bother ruining it.

Believe it or not, I've never seen Straw Dogs, so no comment. But I'm looking forward to the new Hulk movie starring Norton, and he's a fan of the comics and actually rewrote the script (or parts of it, anyway) to be more faithful to the comic.

The Dirty Dozen

I don't know what's worse, A Dirty Dozen remake or the prospect of Tarantino's Inglorious Bastards being released around the same time.

I think a remake is a bad idea. Especially considering they milked it for all it was worth with pointless made for tv sequels (with Telly Savalas, who was in the original movie, taking over as the lead (as a new character, of course) after Lee Marvin died) and a (justifiably) short-lived tv series.

The movie I think is the biggest crime, however, is the remake of The Day The Earth Stood Still, with Ted Neo Utah Constantine himself Keanu Reeves playing Klatuu. It happens to be one of my mother's favorite movies of all time, and we both agreed that someone like Liam Neeson would have been a much better choice for the part. Keanu would make a much better Gort!

Edited April 2, 2008 by GhostMachine