EU3

[NobBe Nobbs]

Two reasons why EU2 can go burn:

1) As Austria, I was at war with Switzerland (or whatever their name is in this) and Brittany decided to join in. I thought no problem, I was besieging Schwyz and they were doing the same with Bern. So, Schwyz surrends finally and I'm about to move into Bern to attempt to force Switzerland to cede Schwyz to me when I notice a message. The moment I made Schwyz surrender, Brittany managed to forcibly annex the entire of Switzerland, so I did all the work and got bugger all out of it. I then made use of some well-planned warnings, though, to get a Casus Belli with Brittany and smoked them. Fuckers take my land...

2) I'm Austria again and in an alliance with Wurtemberg. Now, originally I was part of an alliance with Prussia, the Teutonic Order and Novgorod (the TO invited me and I joined) when Wurtemberg joined the alliance as well. I think the TO were the leaders. Anyway, Wurtemberg went to war against the Palatinat and I agreed to uphold the alliance, only for the others to say "lol no" and break it off, leaving me and Wurtemberg in an alliance together. I got a white peace with the Palatinat simply because I couldn't be bothered fighting them. Later, I inadvertantly accepted a mission asking me to conquer Bayern, which was in Wurtembergian hands; I tried to declare war on the fuckers, but because I'm both still in this alliance and not the leader of it, I can't.

To summarise: Fuck Brittany and Wurtemberg.

Hmm, interesting addendum. Apparently the game is in somewhat of a loop - I cannot leave the alliance with Wurtemberg because I'm actually the leader of it. Any suggestions on how to fix it?

Edited April 3, 2007 by Tree

[NobBe Nobbs]

SUCCESS! In the form of Munster, who invited me into an alliance with them and in accepting, meant Wurtemberg can go fuck themselves! And now, because they had no-one else but me to have them back, attack my idle armies!

Superbo, I couldn't force a full annexation but at least I took Bayern and made the lone province my vassals.

Edited April 3, 2007 by Tree

[stokeriño]

Some of the EU2 mechanics are somewhat iffy in comparison to EU3, aye.

[stokeriño]

I post this in here because, well, Hearts of Iron II and others are all part of the Paradox Interactive historical strategy series ala EU3.

Has anyone else bought the Armageddon add-on to HoI2: Doomsday? You can find it here. It's download-only and costs 4.99 Euros or equivilent. Apparently it carries on for a bit further after Doomsday left off (which was 1953).

I would buy it right now, but I know it would distract me from my awesome EU3 France game.

[The Sultan of Swank]

I've got it. It's fun for a little while. HoI2 was always far too easy and cumbersome in my opinion.

My EU3 has randomly crashed like 4 times now with no error message. Why?

[NobBe Nobbs]

Ouch.

Well, after becoming the biggest power as the Austrians, I had a very bad reputation and a ton of people who wanted to see me barbecued. I figured I'd be fine because, with provinces all over the shop (especially after a couple of events that gave me more land than I knew what to do with), I could conceivably beat up anyone I needed to.

That was, however, before there was a civil war and about 80% of my armies turned.

I say again, ouch.

[Fanku Kaibutsu]

So, I've got the game, installed it, downloaded the patch, and I can't play it. After the intro movies, my screen goes blank and it says "Input not supported", which means the game is in a resolution my monitor can't support. Is there a way to change the game's resolution without actually going into the game?

[Gongsun Zan]

Try settings.txt in your installation folder.

I'm going off memory though.

[Farmer Reil]

Be controls territories all over the world, and eventually the world gets sick of it and turns on him? ¬_¬ EU2 bears a striking resemblance to EWB ¬_¬.

Anyway, I started another new game after Sweden ripped Norway a new one in 1520 ¬_¬. Burgundy this time, and it started off quite well last night. Rather than the huge blue strip cutting my country in half, the big lime green stain in the north, or the tiny yellow blob at the top, I decided to start painting Europe burgundy with... Calais, the nearly-the-same-colour tiny little square in the northwest ¬_¬.

This started out well - I took Calais - but then the Portuguese dropped by for a chat, and nearly left with Holland. So I eventually gave in, and accepted an English peace treaty, giving me a massive TWO ducats, in exchange for leaving them alone. Now, Calais is half-blue, because the French are having a pop at them.

I moved on to one of those "small-scale wars" the manual was so fond of, and tried taking Liege. At this point, I was allied with Conought (which was slightly odd, but the alliance was forged in the middle of the war with England, so maybe they thought I'd help them take Meath - ha!). Liege were allied with Cologne (who IMMEDIATELY said "shitshitshitshit! Please leave us alone :'(") and Munster.

First lesson in Medieval Geography: The importance of an umlaut. Munster are a tiny Irish provice, who would've been no problem at all in this war, and may even have helped Conaught by rolling over and dieing, allowing them to expand southwards.

Münster were sitting on my border, ready to take my precious provinces, starting with...umm... whatever the one south of Liege is called. Ignoring them is a silly idea. Luckily, the real Irishmen arrived and threw themselves at Province-South-Of-Liege, of course, this didn't take very long for the Munstermen to defeat, but it gave me three extra months of sieging Liege (Siege and Liege don't rhyme, by the way. It's annoying when people can't talk properly (says the Cornishman who's lived in Bristol... ¬_¬). Unless you mean 'person you've offered alliegence to', that liege rhymes, but not Liege the place in Belgium. Don't you just love language? That's language, the word that doesn't rhyme with guage, but does sound like mortgage ¬_¬ Anyway, I think I was telling a story, these parenthesis have gone on way too long). Yeah, so the guys from Conaught bravely threw themselves onto Munster-with-an-umlaut's pikes, leaving me to capture Liege and force-vassalise them (annexing is cruel ¬_¬, I've got a bad enough reputation anyway), in time to get back and defend the-province-just-below-Liege. Oh, and that shitty greeney-blue country behind Liege was allied with me. So for shits and giggles I made Liege give up their claims on that province as part of the peace treaty. No idea why, I was just clicking random buttons.

So I've vassalised Liege, buggered up an assault on Calais which is now pretty much French (I'm on pretty good terms with France at the moment. I asked them for, and recieved, military access so I could get the rest of my army up from my capital to Liege, and I granted their request for miltary access too, although I'm not entirely sure why they need it ¬_¬ I don't think I'll bother allying with them though... they'll be in far too many wars, and eventually one of them will be with me, whether I'm their ally or not ). Next target is the lime green country to my north-east, who's name escapes me.

Just before I saved, my king died. Unlike in reality, my land wasn't divided between France and Austria ¬_¬ Instead, I have a pretty useless Queen, Anne I. There goes another stability point.

[NobBe Nobbs]

Be controls territories all over the world, and eventually the world gets sick of it and turns on him? ¬_¬ EU2 bears a striking resemblance to EWB ¬_¬.

[NobBe Nobbs]

FUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDYFUCKBURGUNDY

Ahem. As Austria, beating up Bavaria, Burgundy made peace with Bavaria despite doing nothing and got the two provinces I'd already taken. Cunts.

Edited April 5, 2007 by Tree

[Gongsun Zan]

Just FYI to everyone, patch 1.2 is out, yay!

[Fanku Kaibutsu]

Try settings.txt in your installation folder.

I'm going off memory though.

[Gongsun Zan]

Bah, the game works fine on Vista...but the music doesn't. Ack.

[NobBe Nobbs]

Ug. This Austria game is pissing me off, so fuck them. Suggest me one of England, France, Castile, Novgorod, China, Byzantium or Turkey to play the Grand Campaign as.

[stokeriño]

I'll suggest Byzantium, only because you seem to have such bad luck that it'll be amusing when the Ottomans rape you so hard. >_>

[NobBe Nobbs]

I hate you.

Byzantium I have had one good experience with, though, that being the Duchy of Athens inevitably cancelling their vassalisation with Tuscany (every single game with any nation that's happened) and getting DP'd. I usually force-annex the bastards.

[Fanku Kaibutsu]

ah, the joys of playing a complex strategy game without any form of instruction. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing, and I can't figure out how to load troops into boats. Well, I think I know how to do that, it's how to get the boats to go to any point that isn't in a port I'm having trouble with.

[RazorsEdge]

Boo. I downloaded the demo and when I tried to run it it said that it failed to create a graphics device, and exited. I'll just assume it is Vista related. >_>

[KevinStorm]

How do you load troops onto boats and transport them anywhere that isn't a port? Or is it possible to unload somewhere that doesn't have a port?