Stand-Up Comedy Mafia

[RoyWill Rumble]

The spots could technically be filled right now and I'd be confident with a good game. It's seriously down to the last three or four spots. That said, I obviously wanna give this a bit more time. I'm gonna be out for a bit and I'll come back tonight and see what's transpired. The game could be up at by later on tonight/early early tomorrow morning. Feel free to still sign up, plzkthx.

Edit: Fuck it, tell a good joke and you up your chances.

Edited March 25, 2009 by Will-E

[The Mask of Norro]

What about me? What about Norro?

[LittleDaniel]

Please???

[thuganomic]

Get me on that mic!

[Bigal]

Pick me!

[Pleatherface]

In, please...

I wanna be Mitch Hedberg, Zombie Comic Aligned Squinty Pothead Wait That's Bullshit Man.. That's Not A Full And Accurate Role Description.. I Totally Ripped You Guys Off.. That's Just Filler.. Yeah... Right On.

Pretty, please.

[StevenRichardsRules]

Carlos Mencia, the Joke-Stealing Beaner needs to be an indy role.

[Matt]

The spots could technically be filled right now and I'd be confident with a good game. It's seriously down to the last three or four spots. That said, I obviously wanna give this a bit more time. I'm gonna be out for a bit and I'll come back tonight and see what's transpired. The game could be up at by later on tonight/early early tomorrow morning. Feel free to still sign up, plzkthx.

Edit: Fuck it, tell a good joke and you up your chances.

Ruki.

Nah, but I have two:

Ryanair pilot Paddy is flying into Heathrow when all of the sudden the engine cuts out, Paddy panics and shouts down the radio "HELP! HELP! Easter! Pancake Tuesday! New Year's Eve. Bank Holiday Monday. April Fools. Halloween. Bonfire night". Voice comes through the radio and says "For fucks sake Paddy, it's mayday!".

Wife walks into the bedroom and says "tonight I'm going to make you the happiest man alive". Husband responds, "are you kidding? who the fuck's going to help you pack at this time of night".

[wrathofcarnage]

Edit: Fuck it, tell a good joke and you up your chances.

Man: Excuse me, are you a single mother?

Woman: No...

Man: Would ya LIKE ta be?

If the answer is yes, well... you're already in!

[-A-]

Argh, I'm perilously close to being in no games once CM finishes

Michael Johnson has been enjoying his retirement. Taking a step back from his coaching duties he decides to relax a bit more and takes up the noble sport of golf. Making his way to his local club, he walks up to the desk to be greeted by a nervous-looking youth in front of him.

"Um ... hello, sir, Mr Johnson. I'm afraid our membership is ... full ... at the moment. There's another club 10 minutes up the road, I'm sure they'd be happy to accept you."

"What? Are you serious? I'm Michael Johnson!"

"OK, 5 minutes up the road."

[Jimmy]

My attempt at a joke.

Two blondes were walking through the woods, deep in conversation, before they came across some tracks.

They were unusually intreged by these tracks because they couldn't figure out what they were.

Were they animal tracks, they asked each other? Are they tracks made by a horse?

...They were still thinking when they get hit by a train.

[NobBe Nobbs]

What's the difference between Madeline McCann and the Scottish?

Spoiler: Click here to view

The Scottish are still tight

Honestly, I have like ninety-one McCann jokes and people seem to like them.

[Matt]

I could trump any sick jokes, but I thought they might be too risque.

[Sousa]

What time is it when the clock strikes 13?

Spoiler: Click here to view

Fuck you o'clock, that's what time it is.

Really, Michael Johnson, -A-? Way to hit these things while they're relevant.

[RoyWill Rumble]

I could trump any sick jokes, but I thought they might be too risque.

There is no such thing.

[Guest Mr. Potato Head]

The punchline to the funniest joke I've ever heard on EWB is in my sig.

[Matt]

Awesome in which case:

NOTE: If you're offended by dead baby jokes, jokes about dead people or jokes about the holocaust, don't read the spoilers.

Spoiler: Click here to view

What's harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree?

Spoiler: Click here to view

My cock whilst I'm doing it

What did Jade Goody's kids get for Mothers day?

Spoiler: Click here to view

Refunds

To say there's allegedly safety in numbers it didn't work out too well for 6 million jews.

That'll do for now, I'll save more for later, but I leave you with a non-sick joke.

A man walks into a shop and says "I'll have a packet of salt and vinegar and a KitKat chunky". The woman behind the counter hands over the crisps and the KitKat chunky. The man looks up at her and says "no, I wanted a regular KitKat, you fat bitch."

Edit: Fixed mistakes It's late.

Edited March 25, 2009 by Footjob Fever

[-A-]

What time is it when the clock strikes 13?

Spoiler: Click here to view

Fuck you o'clock, that's what time it is.

Really, Michael Johnson, -A-? Way to hit these things while they're relevant.

I just thought of famous black sprinters The original joke was Linford Christie but I didn't know how famous he was outside this country. Also, Michael Johnson is awesome.

[RoyWill Rumble]

Soooo, this actually ended up first come first serve because everyone who signed up I could make a compelling reason for being in the game. I honestly plan on running a continued version of this game if it is a success because there's a lottttttt of people I didn't cover. Also, I took some chances with some roles, so hopefully things will go well.

And as for reserves, I know that the list is huge, but if a reserve is needed then I will go by looking at who is around and my decision will come via whoever on the reserve list PMs me first. There will be at least a day warning for those being replaced. AND people will have to both post AND send in night actions to be considered active in my opinion.

So, sorry to anyone who didn't get it and congrats to anyone who did. Basically, everyone brings something to the game and is a good player from what I've seen ('cept Ruki, who I just wanna see meltdown. I keed, I love you) so it came down to first-come first-serve.

1. YoungB

2. Ruki

3. The Mask of Norro (promised him a pre-reg if he wanted it considering he pre-reg'd me in Web Comic mafia)

4. RW

5. The Ross Walker

6. Be

7. MPH

8. Teej

9. Essa

10. GoGo

11. Sousa

12. Pris

13. Jesus/Pizzamonkey

14. Ace Andrews

15. Split Second

Reserves:

Blehschmidt

LCS

WrathofCarnage

Matt/Footjob FEEEEEEVAAAAAAAAH!~

LD

thug

Bigal

Pleatherface

SRR

-A-

I'm working on randomizing the roles now and finding some pictures, so expect PMs and the beginning of the game by the end of the night.

Edited March 26, 2009 by Will-E