Signs that your Premier League club are screwed

[ChrisSteeleAteMyHamster]

Please add....

1. Iain Dowie is unveiled as your new manager.

2. Rob Earnshaw and Ade Akinbiyi are signed to make up your new strike force.

3. Wigan come back from 5-1 down to beat you 6-5.

4. The board are trying to sign Fabianski from Arsenal because "he's more reliable" than your current keeper.

[Blue Rosler]

5. Your summer transfer targets include Marlon Harewood, Mido and Robbie Savage.

[Captain Kirk]

6. Nathan Blake is in your team.

[new_era]

7. When Liverpool win The Premier League

8. When Djemba-Djemba is your midfield rock

9. When Sergei Rebrov is your main goal threat

Edited May 26, 2010 by new_era

[Shelty92]

10. Yanks.

[hugobomb]

11. David Gold and David Sullivan announce they are interested in buying you.

[hackerjack]

12. You sign a player who earns more than double the amount in pounds per week that you get people in your average attendance.

[ChrisSteeleAteMyHamster]

13. Your big summer signing is a player who you've signed in the knowledge that he's going to be injured for the next few months.

[stokeriño]

14. Your shirt sponsor is a job recruitment agency.

15. There's a line in your matchday programme about how last week's 1-0 FA Cup 3rd Round victory against a lower league side gives cause for "renewed optimism".

16. Alan Hansen no longer bothers to criticise your team's defensive frailties on Match of the Day because there's nothing he hasn't said before.

[brenchill]

17. In a bid to sure up your frail midfield, In the january transfer window Nigel Quashie joins you on a loan deal until the end of the season.

[Blue Rosler]

18. After a long summer of speculation, Glenn Roeder is announced as your new manager.

[R.W.]

19. Iain Dowie is your new "Managment Consultant"

[stokeriño]

20. You sign Jamie Devitt.

[METALMAN]

21. One of Dave Bassett, Howard Wilkinson or Terry Venables is brought in to give the manager a hand.

[SeanDMan]

22. Hacking your team website reveals that they are rolling out "Npower Champions 2011" merchadise into upcoming editions of the team store.

[hugobomb]

23. Ken Bates buys you promising to take you out of the Championship, then asks if he really needs to pay tax

Edited May 26, 2010 by Hugobombski

[new_era]

24. You're linked with Carlos Puyol only to sign Jean Alain Boumsong

[brenchill]

25. You are Newcastle United.

[9 to 5]

26. You are Burnley. So you deserve everthing you get.

[SeanDMan]

27. Your team plays a few friendlies to warm up for the season against MLS teams, and manages to lose them all.