TMM

I just turned it on tonight and have heard the twins voice for about 20 seconds and they're already doing my head on. Shut your mouths and get your clothes off damnit!!!

If there is no lesbian twin action, I shall be disappointed. Or at least some lesbian action that doesn't include Carole, Leslie, Charley or Tracey will suit me.

I feel sorry for Leslie...Leslie for the win, come on!

Leslie looks ready to kill someone...or herself.

What...what the hell is that? I see breasts, but I'm not sure. It's cuckoo.

My ears...my ears...they bleed...

Yeah, as in they can wear the bikini bottoms but not the top, so...topless-ness. Just a rumour, but I wouldn't be surprised at all as C4 are desperate for someone to have sex.

Apparently there was talk of banning bikini tops, there's also a secret garden, and there is only one single bed with the others sleeping three or four. Still gonna be shite though.

Great rack begs to differ...although McGowan has a great one to...damn it's difficult. I think this is how all female roles should be filled; best tits.

Oooo, let's hope it's Carla Gugino! She's hot, so, yeah, her please!

What players do you have in your team? That's an awesome achievement, I managed a similar thing with my Walsall team on '06 when I finished 4th in my first season as well. Oh, and most important, what skin is that?

It's a stupid decision for Sidwell, but from the Chelski point of view it makes sense because half of their midfield will be away playing the African Cup of Nations in January.

Ha, trust Paul Jewell to try and kill someone for giving the ball back. Man I hate that Wigan have survived. Wankers.

I love that Chelski have to do the guard of honour at Stamford Bridge for Man Utd. Ah, it'll be lubberly.

So...what game was Jose watching tonight? Chelsea were playing for penalties. Yeah they tried to score, but so did Liverpool and quite frankly more-so. Ah, I love Mourinho-excuses.

Milan are dirty cheats who shouldn't even be in the competition this season at all, so they are lucky to be in the semi's at all. I'm praying for a Liverpool/Man Utd final myself.

Liverpool vs. Man Utd is still much bigger a game than Chelsea vs. Man Utd. No matter how many times Kenyon tries to tell everyone, Chelsea are not on the scale of Man Utd, Liverpool or Arsenal in England. The two Premier League titles they've won beg to differ sadly. In 50+ years...

Liverpool vs. Man Utd is still much bigger a game than Chelsea vs. Man Utd. No matter how many times Kenyon tries to tell everyone, Chelsea are not on the scale of Man Utd, Liverpool or Arsenal in England.

Ah...it's brilliant seeing Cashley Cunt all dejected. That made my day...well, that and that Chelski are out.

YAY!!!! BYE BYE CHELSKI!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!!!

BOLO!!!! YAY!!!! FUCK YOU ROBBEN!!!! COME ON LIVERPOOL!!!!

Pfft, Fowler's all "fuck this running malarky"

Wow...Robben fell over again. If they score, we riot....BWAHAHAHAHAHA, ah, how we love thee Fat Frank.

Hey ITV commentator dudes...give us a sign on the air if you're reading. Burp or something.