Jason Statham

[GhostMachine]

Watched Chaos a couple of months back and Crank on cable last night, and I was wondering if anyone else is a Jason Statham fan and can recommend anything he's in to watch besides those two films, Ghosts of Mars and the Transporter movies.

(There's a Crank 2 coming out in April or May, and the premise sounds nuttier than the first. But then again, it would have to be considering the end of the first movie)

[Jimmy]

Snatch is quality.

[EddieG]

Just watched Transporter 3, Death Race and the Bank Job in the last 2 days.. all pure class..

HUGE Statham fan

And as SS said .. Snatch is pretty fucking quality too

[MalaCloudy Black]

Crank 2 looks fucking awesome.

[Ruki]

I have a mancrush on Jason Statham.

[LL!]

Whoever doesn't have a man crush on Statham is not a real man. His best include all the Guy Ritchie stuff he's in: Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch (I haven't seen Revolver yet, but at least one person has told me he enjoyed it. ) However, I really enjoyed The Bank Job as well. As for more action oriented... Crank and The Transporter Trilogy you can't go wrong with. Apart from that, I haven't seen Death Race, but I'm sure it's mindless fun. The Italian Job wasn't bad. Cellular sucked balls. And he had a part in Collateral which was spectacular.

Also, he's coming out with Crank 2 which by the looks of it looks fucking crazier than Crank which is all good. And he's got 13 (Remake of 13 Tzameti which was pretty insane in its own right and fun) with Mickey Rourke and The Expendables also with Mickey Rourke, Sylvester Stallone, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li, Ahnold, Eric Roberts, and Danny Trejo. Just by the cast I know the movie will be crazy as all shit.

Yeah, I love Jason Statham.

[GRIFT]

While we are on the subject of the Statham Man Crush here is something Patton Oswald wrote on the subject...

GAY-THAM FOR STATHAM

Jason Statham has never been in a great movie.

He's also never been in a boring one.

Statham's imdb.com profile, collectively, is a promise to you, the weary filmgoer. It's a promise that says, "I promise that you will not FOR ONE SECOND be bored during one of my movies. You won't learn shit about the human condition, or feel a collective connection with the brotherhood of man. But if you give me $10, I will fuck an explosion while a Slayer song plays".

I just watched CRANK on Showtime, and I can't understand how I missed this when it was in theaters.

I'm buying THE BANK JOB and DEATHRACE on iTunes today. After CRANK, Mr. Statham can count on my $10 every time he makes a movie. If someone figures out how to make a movie for $8, and it stars Jason Statham, then they're guaranteed a $2 profit.

I look forward to any new film by Ang Lee, David Gordon Green, Paul Thomas Anderson, The Coen Brothers, Paul Greengrass or Ross McElwee.

And now, Jason Statham. I don't know how much say he has in the films he makes. But I get the impression that he reads the scripts. And if the script doesn't make him want to drive a bulldozer through a cake store, I'll bet he punches the script through a wall.

In fact, my entire stack of Academy screeners would have been vastly improved by the addition of Jason Statham. Here we go:

CHANGELING: Jason Statham plays the kidnapped boy, who immediately beats his kidnappers to death, then fights female assassins on top of a blimp.

CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON: Jason Statham injects the backward-aging man-freak with a Sino/Chilean rage compound, and they fight in lava pit.

DEFIANCE: Jason Statham throws Hitler into a woodchipper, eats the entrails as they fly out the other end, and then shits out Winston Churchill.

DOUBT: Jason Statham drop-kicks the Pope through the core of the Earth, and the Pope's head goes up Meryl Streep's ass and then Motorhead's "The Ace of Spades" plays.

FROST/NIXON: Jason Statham pulls off David Frost's skin, drops him into a tank of sea salt, and then Statham and Nixon rent a limo and drive across country, shotgunning hippies.

GRAN TORINO: Jason Statham glowers at Clint Eastwood, who glowers back, creating a Glower Vortex which destroys the planet.

THE READER: Statham kills the teenage kid with a lawnmower, then fucks Kate Winslet literate.

REVOLUTIONARY ROAD: Jason Statham drives an 18-wheeler full of nitro into the title suburb, blows everything to shit, and then spends 90 minutes hunting down absolutely everyone involved with the making of this film, beating them to death with TV trays.

THE WRESTLER: Jason Statham, Richard Nixon, the 'roided-out Benjamin Button murder-freak, the Churchill feces-baby and Mickey Rourke drive cross country in a limo, with Leo DiCaprio's severed head on the hood, where they crash the Spirit Awards and kill everyone.

There you go. Statham! Full disclosure: I saw Jason Statham eating a salad at Joan's on 3rd, here in L.A. Really, I did. I wanted to say hello, but he seemed like he could chuck an arugula leaf through my skull.

Do yourselves a favor, Academy voters. CRANK 2: HIGH VOLTAGE comes out April 19th. On April 20th, rescind all the voting categories. There should be one statue given out next year -- a 45-foot, sentient Oscar kill-bot, which Jason Statham will fight to the death at the next ceremony.

STATHAM! YELL IT WHEN YOU ARE FUCKING!

[LL!]

Yes, Patton Oswalt is awesome and I read that around the time he posted it. This is one of the best lines ever:

If someone figures out how to make a movie for $8, and it stars Jason Statham, then they're guaranteed a $2 profit.

[Lint]

I agree with weveryone so far. I wouild totally go gay for jason statham. But he did make one boring movie...in the name of the king. Its a uwe boll movie though, so its more bolls fault the movie sucked ass. Avoid that one but every other statham movie is ace

[James Casey]

Don't forget his cameo in Collateral...

...but he is the man. The Mrs. and I watched Transporter a few weeks back and we were like "How in the name of all that's holy did we miss this?"

Edited March 17, 2009 by James Casey

[Lint]

Don't forget "war" costarring jet li. Movie was so badass its beyond words

[Adam]

Mean Machine is a good film, but Statham doesn't have a great role in that.

I didn't really like the second Transporter and haven't seen the third, but the first one is great. As others have said, Snatch is brilliant too.

[Toe]

I didn't like the first two Transporter movies and won't watch the third, but everything else I have seen him in has been entertaining. I thought Death Race was very entertaining and Crank was awesome. I am going to watch Crank 2.

He is probably the Arnold or Stallone of this generation.

EDIT - I just found out that Crank was made for less then $20 million. That is impressive considering how cool that movie turned out.

Edited March 18, 2009 by Toe

[Vendetta]

Him fucking Amy Smart in public was the hottest thing ever

[XxCactusmikexX]

The Bank job

[K]

Statham rules in everything, although not everything he is in rules.

If that makes sense.

The One is shit, for example.

[ChrisSteeleAteMyHamster]

Statham is one of my favourite actors to watch. He makes everything instantly better by being in it.

As K mentioned, The One is hardly a great film but Statham's presence improves it.

Transporter movies are loadsa fun, Snatch and Lock Stock are brilliant, Crank is sensational....I really need to watch Revolver even though I hear loads of bad stuff about it!

Basically he just seems to KNOW when he's in a ridiculous film and refuses to take himself too seriously.

Crank 2 I'm MAJORLY in two minds about it. Basically for me the first one has so quickly passed into folklore that it should have been untouchable. However, I love Crank and watching the trailer for the second one means I KNOW I'll watch it cos it's Statham at his best and he's looking for people who have his HEART. Brilliant

[darkrayne]

Statham rules in everything, although not everything he is in rules.

If that makes sense.

The One is shit, for example.

I must disagree, as The One and War are some of his best... and having Jet Li in them sure doesnt hurt any at alll.

[livid]

Whoever doesn't have a man crush on Statham is not a real man. His best include all the Guy Ritchie stuff he's in: Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch (I haven't seen Revolver yet, but at least one person has told me he enjoyed it. ) However, I really enjoyed The Bank Job as well. As for more action oriented... Crank and The Transporter Trilogy you can't go wrong with. Apart from that, I haven't seen Death Race, but I'm sure it's mindless fun. The Italian Job wasn't bad. Cellular sucked balls. And he had a part in Collateral which was spectacular.

Also, he's coming out with Crank 2 which by the looks of it looks fucking crazier than Crank which is all good. And he's got 13 (Remake of 13 Tzameti which was pretty insane in its own right and fun) with Mickey Rourke and The Expendables also with Mickey Rourke, Sylvester Stallone, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li, Ahnold, Eric Roberts, and Danny Trejo. Just by the cast I know the movie will be crazy as all shit.

Yeah, I love Jason Statham.

It's not bad but at the same time, going in you should know that it is pretty much a bunch of Kabbalah bullshit and ultimately is a movie that Ritchie couldn't really pull off.

And The Expendables got more awesome recently the additions of Charisma Carpenter and...STONE COLD.

[K]

As long as the moment Revolver finishes, you stop thinking about it, it's all good.

If you actually try and digest it, you're just going to upset yourself. So don't. Stick a finger down your throat, throw it all back up again and then forget about it.