Oh dear god.

[Guest Angry Baboon]

I found out about this from a friend I made at a concert I just got back from. A few of us were out on the dock and he started telling these stories. They're by Chuck Palahniuk, same guy who wrote Fight Club. It's three stories.

The first one, is kinda funny, in a sad way.

The second one just sucks, but interesting to read.

The third one though, watch the fuck out, I'm warning you. If you're the least bit squemish this will probably fuck you up. I'm not very squemish myself, and I fucking passed out while my friend was telling this. So don't say I didn't warn you.

http://www.seizureandy.com/stuff/guts.html

Good luck.

[DMN in the House]

That was bad ass.

[FunkAsPuck]

Thats the weirdest and most disgusting thing I have ever read.

It was awesome (Y)

[Clawson]

Interesting...very very interesting.

[Scarface]

Do do do do you have it?

Do do do do you have it?

GUTS!

That story was sick, but I guess I'm sick, as it didn't really affect me except certain things they were talking about.

***Spoilers***

I had this urinary tract infection last year, and the doctor at the hospital had to stick a Q-Tip down my penis hole to get some cells. It stung like a bitch, so when they talked about masterbating that way, it brought back that shit, and I was afraid to pee again. Bastard.

[Death Before Dishonor]

Okay, I fucking just puked after reading that. I'm not usually squimish, but that was just out of this world. Fucking stomach churning.

[The Mask of Norro]

It's funny how I can read through that, get mental images and be mildly disgusted, but the moment anyone mentions Tubgirl I get a flashback of the picture and gag.

I have a strong stomach when it comes to READING things...but seeing/smelling things is another story. Gah.

Pretty fucking brutal story there though...God damn.

[Guest MuRd0K]

as I said to squancho on the msn:

]-[ Jorge ]-[ says:

Oh my god....

]-[ Jorge ]-[ says:

lmao

]-[ Jorge ]-[ says:

I am supposed to be puking... but I'm laughing my ass off

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

it's horrid isn't it?

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

j00 monster!!!11

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

He got disembowled through his butt!

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

HOW IS THAT FUNNY GOOD SIR

]-[ Jorge ]-[ says:

Who the fuck beats off underwater?

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

xd

[~Angry Baboon~] I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy. says:

true

]-[ Jorge ]-[ says:

and saying "Now I know why girls like it" it's the uber-gay

[Big Tuna]

Good lord, that is fucking disgusting.

[cthemason]

I started reading it like "I won't get grossed out big fuckin deal"...

I feel sick.

[DMN in the House]

You're all pansies.

It wasn't that bad. I was eating and I was fine.

[Commander Sheepard]

I hate to do it, but I have to agree with syco here. That wasn't THAT bad. I mean, yeah, it was THAT bad, but it wasn't THAT BAD, if that makes sense.

Still, like, ouch. Seriously ouch.

[EWFan2004]

I don't know why you all compaining I seen worse then what I read for the link

[Numbahs]

...yeah, that wasn't that bad. Having read all his books, I knew what I was in for.

[LL!]

Wasn't that bad at all. I'm fine. I just feel really sorry for the guy, but hey he made a stupid mistake and is man enough to admit. Take note people...

old school masturbation is better.

[Blehschmidt]

I didn't find it disgusting...

Al I can think of is "Dumb Ass"

[Godfatha]

I've seen this before. It was odd, there's an audio recording of this as well and it's supposedly funny if you hear it. I'll see if I can find the link.

EDIT: I'm not sure if I should post this what with it being an MP3 and all but I figure it's him reading his own work. So here's the MP3.

Linkage

Edited August 3, 2004 by Godfatha

[Gongsun Zan]

Amusing story to tell if you're ever at a dinner party. I got to remember that :thumbsup:

But seriously, Chuck should just stick to writing gross-out stories, instead of randomly inserting them in his novels for no reason whatsoever other than to gross out people. Then again, his novels aren't much to sing about either...

[Big Red Fury]

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, c'mon people you cannot tell me that that is not funny. Infact you might even say that it was "gut wrenchingly funny". BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.