Cuthman

Shame we're shit at penalties.

I can see Torres returning to Spain for a couple of years. I think that will be very beneficial to him and he might be able to return to England refreshed and in much better form.

Lucky! Munich looks like a very lovely city too.

metalman? More like medalman, am I right?

What is up with that QPR collar? It looks dreadful. Rest of the kit isn't too bad though. Nice looking Valencia shirt, pinstripes always look decent.

This one is difficult to do by oneself. It requires a team effort. I'm planning to make one right now but creating it completely alone will be near-impossible.

Isn't that every player?

Martinez is apparently the bookie's favourite to get the job with 6/5 odds. That pretty much means that the job is going to someone else.

That's even worse then! When Heskey, playing in midfield, has scored more goals than you and probably assists too, you should have a good long look at yourself retire.

Emile Heskey, who is notoriously known for being frankly terrible when it comes to scoring goals, has scored more than Stewart Downing this season despite having 43 less shots. One may argue that Heskey is a forward so would score more goals anyway, but the rate is still really shocking on Downing's end. A Wikipedia vandal summed it up well on Downing's page. "Downing has managed no league goals and no assists over the entire league season, even after taking one penalty and 72 shots and yet this form is good enough for the England national team."

I have my doubts that Di Canio actually racially abused Tehoue. Paolo may be outspoken, just doesn't seem like that kind of person. Then again, I also thought Ryan Giggs was probably the most humble and respectable player around and that Luis Suarez was actually a nice guy.

While it would be such a great finish to a fairytale story for Holt, one has to acknowledge that, realistically, he is unlikely to be included in the squad. Ruddy might be in contention, though. Ray Clemence was at the Norwich and Villa match, likely casting his eye for a possible third choice keeper.

The "People" picture pack takes a bloody long time to download. I'm sure it will be worth it in the end.

No Doubt, Less Than Jake and Reel Big Fish are three names that come instantly to mind. The Offspring also have some ska-influenced songs like "Why Don't You Get a Job?".

Villa are bigger and better than both sides they're currently at. Martinez stayed out of loyalty to Whelan and nothing else. You're assuming Lambert wants to stay and secure Norwich's position when he's already said himself; ‎'Paul, will you still be at Norwich at the start of next season?' Lambert: 'Erm, erm, erm, it's difficult to answer that' Surely if he wanted to stay and was going to that question would be answered differently. Assuming Villa sack McLeish and replace him before the start of the season I reckon we'd finish above Wigan and Norwich. Lambert would be taking a big step forward by coming to Villa Park and he knows it. I don't think Martinez wants to leave Wigan, he's happy and settled there and is a very loyal man. He'll see his contract out. I disagree. Villa are not the side they used to be. Fair enough, they have talented players but that's all they have going for them. They've practically fallen apart, which is a shame because I like Villa a fair bit. Lambert could sort out the problems at Villa, he's very detail-orientated and great at man management, but I don't see him going. It's like saying Brendan Rodgers, who is similar in that sense to Lambert, will leave for Villa Park. Lambert will leave Norwich one day, probably sooner other than later, but it won't be to a team like Villa. We're still bigger and better than Norwich, Wigan, Swansea, etc. I'm not denying that they're bigger than them teams, I'm merely suggesting that their managers will not leave for an outfit that are frankly stuck in a rut like Villa's. I guess we can agree to disagree.

Villa are bigger and better than both sides they're currently at. Martinez stayed out of loyalty to Whelan and nothing else. You're assuming Lambert wants to stay and secure Norwich's position when he's already said himself; ‎'Paul, will you still be at Norwich at the start of next season?' Lambert: 'Erm, erm, erm, it's difficult to answer that' Surely if he wanted to stay and was going to that question would be answered differently. Assuming Villa sack McLeish and replace him before the start of the season I reckon we'd finish above Wigan and Norwich. Lambert would be taking a big step forward by coming to Villa Park and he knows it. I don't think Martinez wants to leave Wigan, he's happy and settled there and is a very loyal man. He'll see his contract out. I disagree. Villa are not the side they used to be. Fair enough, they have talented players but that's all they have going for them. They've practically fallen apart, which is a shame because I like Villa a fair bit. Lambert could sort out the problems at Villa, he's very detail-orientated and great at man management, but I don't see him going. It's like saying Brendan Rodgers, who is similar in that sense to Lambert, will leave for Villa Park. Lambert will leave Norwich one day, probably sooner other than later, but it won't be to a team like Villa.

Regardless, neither Martinez nor Lambert will leave their respective club for Aston Villa. Martinez is clearly happy at Wigan and will probably be looking to fight for a higher spot on the table next season, and Lambert probably wants to secure Norwich's status as a Premier League club in the long-run. Neither manager will leave for at least a couple of seasons unless a big team like Liverpool come snooping around.

Martinez rejected Villa last season, didn't he? I doubt he would have changed his mind. Likewise, hasn't Lambert already said he would not take the Villa job?

THREE! YES THANK YOU! KUN YOU BEAUTY!

2-2! 2-2! 2-2! Now Sunderland just need to score!

Looks like the title is heading to Manchester.

Joey Barton, the world's most violent pacifist.