EWBFF Ki-Jana Carter League

[Maxx]

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

Welcome to Season 9 of the EWB Fantasy Football League. This year's leagues are named after bust running backs, as you can tell.

Round 1

1. Livid - Adrian Peterson, RB, Vikings

2. DMN - Aaron Rodgers, QB, Packers
3. Maxx - Drew Brees, QB, Saints
4. Lowerdeck- Peyton Manning, QB, Broncos
5. Rocksta- Cam Newton, QB, Panthers

6. kbusch- Tom Brady, QB, Patriots
7. LL- Eli Manning, QB, Giants
8. Damshow- Calvin Johnson, WR, Lions
9. Dragsy- Ray Rice, RB, Ravens
10. Srar- Doug Martin, RB, Buccaneers

11. Midget- Matt Ryan, QB, Falcons

12. Plubby- Arian Foster, RB, Texans

Round 2

1. Plubby- AJ Green, WR, Bengals
2. Midget- Marshawn Lynch, RB, Seahawks
3. Srar- Jamaal Charles, RB, Chiefs

4. Dragsy- Brandon Marshall, WR, Bears
5. Damshow- Colin Kaepernick and Associated Swag, QB, 49ers
6. LL- Dez Bryant, WR, Cowboys
7. Kbusch- Trent Richardson, RB, Browns

8. Rocksta- LeSean McCoy, RB, Eagles
9. Lowerdeck- CJ Spiller, RB, Buffalo

10. Maxx- Julio Jones, WR, Falcons
11. DMN- Maurice Jones-Drew, RB, Jaguars

12. Livid- Alfred Morris, RB, Racist Team Name

Round 3

1. Livid - Matt Forte, RB, Bears

2. DMN - Darren McFadden, RB, Raiders
3. Maxx - DeMaryius Thomas, WR, Broncos
4. Lowerdeck- Steven Jackson, RB, Falcons
5. Rocksta- Jimmy Graham, TE, Saints

6. kbusch- Victor Cruz, WR, Giants
7. LL- Frank Gore, RB, 49ers
8. Damshow- Chris Johnson, RB, Titans
9. Dragsy- Darren Sproles, RB, Saints
10. Srar- Andre Johnson, WR, Texans

11. Midget- Vincent Jackson, WR, Buccaneers

12. Plubby- Vernon Davis, TE, 49ers

Round 4

1. Plubby- Stevan Ridley, RB, Patriots
2. Midget- Eric Decker, WR, Broncos
3. Srar- Randall Cobb, WR, Packers

4. Dragsy- Marques Colston, WR, Falcons
5. Damshow- Larry Fitzgerald, WR, Cardinals
6. LL- Wes Welker, WR, Broncos
7. Kbusch- Jason Witten, TE, Cowboys

8. Rocksta- Reggie Bush, RB, Lions
9. Lowerdeck- Roddy White, WR, Falcons

10. Maxx- DeMarco Murray, RB, Cowboys
11. DMN- Greg Jennings, WR, Vikings

12. Livid- Reggie Wayne, WR, Colts

Round 5

1. Livid- Danny Amendola, WR, Patriots
2. DMN- Torrey Smith, WR, Ravens
3. Maxx- Montee Ball, RB, Broncos

4. Lowerdeck- Lamar Miller, RB, Dolphins

5. Rocksta- Rob Gronkowski, TE, Patriots

6. Kbusch- Steve Smith, WR, Panthers

7. LL- Kyle Rudolph, TE, Vikings

8. Damshow- Tony Gonzalez, TE, Falcons

9. Dragsy- Antonio Gates, TE, Chargers

10. Srar- Dwayne Bowe, WR, Chiefs

11. Midget- Heath Miller, TE, Steelers

12. Plubby- Andrew Luck, QB, Colts

Round 6

1. Plubby- Pierre Garcon, WR, Racist Team Name
2. Midget- Chris Ivory, RB, Jets
3. Srar- Robert Griffin III, QB, Racist Team Name

4. Dragsy- Ben Rapelisberger, QB, Steelers
5. Damshow- Ahmad Bradshaw, RB, Colts
6. LL- Cecil Shorts, WR, Jaguars
7. Kbusch- Mike Wallace, WR, Dolphins

8. Rocksta- Hakeem Nicks, WR, Giants
9. Lowerdeck- Le'veon Bell, RB, Steelers

10. Maxx- James Jones, WR, Packers
11. DMN- Greg Olsen, TE, Panthers

12. Livid- Matthew Stafford, QB, Lions

Round 7

1. Livid- Brandon Myers, TE, Giants
2. DMN- Seattle Seahawks Defense
3. Maxx- Shane Vereen, RB, Patriots

4. Lowerdeck- Antonio Brown, WR, Steelers

5. Rocksta- DeSean Jackson, WR, Eagles

6. Kbusch- David Wilson, RB, Giants

7. LL- BenJarvus Green-Ellis, RB, Bengals

8. Damshow- Stevie Johnson, WR, Buffalo

9. Dragsy- Chicago Bears Defense

10. Srar- Ryan Matthews, RB, Chargers

11. Midget- Anquan Boldin, WR, 49ers

12. Plubby- Tavon Austin, WR, Rams

Round 8

1. Plubby- Denver Broncos Defense
2. Midget- New England Patriots Defense
3. Srar- T.Y. Hilton, WR, Colts

4. Dragsy- Rashard Mendenhall, RB, Cardinals
5. Damshow- Tony Romo, QB, Cowboys
6. LL- Sidney Rice, WR, Seahawks
7. Kbusch- San Francisco 49ers Defense

8. Rocksta- Houston Texans Defense
9. Lowerdeck- Owen Daniels, TE, Texans

10. Maxx- Eddie Lacy, RB, Packers
11. DMN- DeAngelo Williams, RB, Panthers

12. Livid- Daryl Richardson, RB, Rams

Round 9

1. Livid- Jordy Nelson, WR, Packers
2. DMN- Denarius Moore, WR, Raiders
3. Maxx- Kenny Britt, WR, Titans

4. Lowerdeck- Russell Wilson, QB, Seahawks

5. Rocksta- Mike Williams, WR, Buccaneers

6. Kbusch- Miles Austin, WR, Cowboys

7. LL- Pittsburgh Steelers Defense

8. Damshow- Mark Ingram, RB, Saints

9. Dragsy- Emmanuel Sanders, WR, Steelers

10. Srar- Vick Ballard, RB, Colts

11. Midget- Andre Brown, RB, Giants

12. Plubby- Giovani Bernard, RB, Bengals

Round 10

1. Plubby- DeAndre Hopkins, WR, Texans
2. Midget- Lance Moore, WR, Saints
3. Srar- Chris Givens, WR, Rams

4. Dragsy- St. Louis Rams Defense
5. Damshow- Golden Tate, WR, Seahawks
6. LL- Ryan Williams, RB, Cardinals
7. Kbusch- Percy Harvin, WR, Seahawks

8. Rocksta- Jonathan Franklin, RB, Packers

9. Lowerdeck- Cincinatti Bengals Defense

10. Maxx- Green Bay Packers Defense
11. DMN- Jared Cook, TE, Rams

12. Livid- Ryan Broyles, WR, Lions

Round 11

1. Livid- Ronnie Hillman, RB, Broncos
2. DMN- Joe Flacco, QB, Ravens
3. Maxx- Zach Sudfeld, TE, Patriots

4. Lowerdeck- Vincent Brown, WR, Chargers

5. Rocksta- Pierre Thomas, RB, Saints

6. Kbusch- Jacquizz "on your face" Rodgers, RB, Falcons

7. LL- Kendall Wright, WR, Titans

8. Damshow- Dustin Keller, TE, Dolphins

9. Dragsy- Andy Dalton, QB, Bengals

10. Srar- Isiah Pead, RB, Rams

11. Midget- Bryce Brown, RB, Eagles

12. Plubby- Michael Vick, QB, Eagles

Round 12

1. Plubby- Brent Celek, TE, Eagles
2. Midget- Sam Bradford, QB, Rams
3. Srar- Martellus Bennett, TE, Bears

4. Dragsy- Jordan Cameron, TE, Browns
5. Damshow- Arizona Cardinals Defense
6. LL- Jermaine Gresham, TE, Bengals
7. Kbusch- Danny Woodhead, RB, Chargers

8. Rocksta- Matt Schaub, QB, Texans

9. Lowerdeck- Baltimore Ravens Defense

10. Maxx- Josh Gordon, WR, Browns
11. DMN- Mikel Leshoure, RB, Lions

12. Livid- Michael Floyd, WR, Cardinals

Round 13

1. Livid- Josh Freeman, QB, Buccaneers

2. DMN- Fred Jackson, RB, Bills
3. Maxx- Rob Housler, TE, Cardinals

4. Lowerdeck- Jermichael Finley, TE, Packers

5. Rocksta- Alshon Jeffrey, WR, Bears

6. Kbusch- Jake Locker, QB, Titans

7. LL- Phillip Rivers, QB, Chargers

8. Damshow- Aaron Dobson, WR, Patriots

9. Dragsy- Ruben Randle, WR, Giants

10. Srar- EJ Manuel, QB, Bills

11. Midget- Brandon Pettigrew, TE, Lions

12. Plubby- LaMichael James, RB, 49ers

Round 14

1. Plubby- Stephen Gostkowski, K, Patriots
2. Midget- Miami Dolphins Defense
3. Srar- Minnesota Vikings Defense

4. Dragsy- Michael Bush, RB, Bears
5. Damshow- Darrius Heyward-Bey, WR, Colts

6. LL- Blair Walsh, K, Vikings
7. Kbusch- Matt Bryant, K, Falcons

8. Rocksta- New York Giants Defense

9. Lowerdeck- Kenbrell Thompkins, WR, Patriots

10. Maxx- Jay Cutler, QB, Bears
11. DMN- Justin Blackmon, WR, Jaguars

12. Livid- Cleveland Browns Defense

Round 15

1. Livid- Greg Zuerlein, K, Rams

2. DMN- Sebastian Janikowski, K, Raiders
3. Maxx- Dan Bailey, K, Cowboys

4. Lowerdeck- Phil Dawson, K, 49ers

5. Rocksta- Matt Prater, K, Broncos

6. Kbusch- Cordarrelle Paterson, WR, Vikings

7. LL- Brian Hartline, WR, Dolphins

8. Damshow- Justin Tucker, K, Ravens

9. Dragsy- Robbie Gould, K, Bears

10. Srar- Randy Bullock K Texans

11. Midget- Steven Hauschka, K, Seahawks

12. Plubby- Kellen Moore, QB, Lions

[gunnar hendershow]

The Ravishing Rick Rudes are reporting for duty.

[Your Mom]

I'm signed up!

[Berober]

Man, I'm bummed I'm not in the Midget/Srar league this year, them two are great comedic fodder!

[thatshortguy]

I'm signed up!

I SIGNED UP BEFORE YOU DID!

http://youtu.be/ANk8xlsp1pQ

[LL!]

I WAS THE FIRST ONE TO SIGN UP!

[thatshortguy]

I WAS THE FIRST ONE TO SIGN UP!

DON'T CARE, DID IT BEFORE JHS!

Who, I'm sad to say, will have more Ls this year than LL if LL multiplied exponentially.

We'll have to rename her Jeff Hardy Loser. Or Loser Hardy Loser.

Or Matt Hardy!

/as cold as ice

//f yo couch, Stalka!

///dey shoulda neva gave dem Srars money!

[LL!]

Snap.

[Your Mom]

Starting early I see. I for one am pacing myself. You'll be out of gas by mid season

[Plubby]

Like the Bears!

[thatshortguy]

Starting early I see. I for one am pacing myself. You'll be out of gas by mid season

Know who was "out of gas" right around midseason?

Ryan Braun.

[Plubby]

A baseball reference. Topical. Watching you try to trash talk Srar reminds me of the child who tries to windmill away at an adult while the adult holds them at arm's length.

Oh and the picture just loaded! You drop-the-mic'd your own joke! Oh that's so damn cute

EDIT: And if that's not enough to spark a rivalry, something about your significant other/next of kin/parents!

[thatshortguy]

A baseball reference. Topical. Watching you try to trash talk Srar reminds me of the child who tries to windmill away at an adult while the adult holds them at arm's length.

Oh and the picture just loaded! You drop-the-mic'd your own joke! Oh that's so damn cute

EDIT: And if that's not enough to spark a rivalry, something about your significant other/next of kin/parents!

You picked Brett Favre Lite last year. Your argument is invalid.

[Your Mom]

You'll never win but I admit the Braun thing still stings

[Plubby]

A baseball reference. Topical. Watching you try to trash talk Srar reminds me of the child who tries to windmill away at an adult while the adult holds them at arm's length.

Oh and the picture just loaded! You drop-the-mic'd your own joke! Oh that's so damn cute

EDIT: And if that's not enough to spark a rivalry, something about your significant other/next of kin/parents!

You picked Brett Favre Lite last year. Your argument is invalid.

Who is Brett Favre Lite? Romo? I remember picking Romo at the beginning.

[DYSI]

Man, I'm bummed I'm not in the Midget/Srar league this year, them two are great comedic fodder!

I guarantee our league will be ten times more entertaining!

...and here's how:

1. Every odd numbered week will be contested under triple threat rules - three teams, one winner!

2. Each week I will randomly change the outcome of a matchup, giving the victory to the loser, and thus making each week a MUST SEE. (I will obviously be excluded)

3. There will be sporadic roster deadlines - truly making each week unpredictable. (I, of course, will properly set my roster each week)

4. All kicker points will be DOUBLED and then immediately set to zero because kickers are pansies.

5. All New York Giants players will automatically be given a 20 point bonus for playing on the greatest NFL franchise.

6. Week 4 will be contested under Teddy Long rules, pitting two teams of two against each other.

7. LL won't be involved, thus making it a significantly better league.

8. Dan will automatically be set to lose every matchup this season.

9. Any buttfumbles will lead to 20 points awarded to the quarterback, just out of pity.

10. Anyone that drafts Aaron Hermandez will recieve a 1000 point bonus the week he is sentenced to jail time. If he's found innocent... well that probably won't happen.

[livid]

So what you're saying is that all the people in your league suck so you have to find ways of making it entertaining for yourself?

[Plubby]

Your move, Maxx.

[Maxx]

No gimmicks needed.

Besides LIVE DRAFT DRAWING!

[DYSI]

So what you're saying is that all the people in your league suck so you have to find ways of making it entertaining for yourself?

Yes.