Paradox games but definitely NOT GAMES OF THRONE

[Noah]

I'd quite like to be an agent of ass death.

I imagine it's like when that viking stabbed King Edmund II up the bottom.

[Benji]

This game has too many options and is very complicated and makes me feel dumb for not understanding what the fuck I'm doing I'd do the tutorial but that just makes me even more confused.

[JasonM]

This game has too many options and is very complicated and makes me feel dumb for not understanding what the fuck I'm doing I'd do the tutorial but that just makes me even more confused.

Suggestions are playing an Irish count (Everyone has gone through noob island) and perhaps searching for Let's play's on the youtubes.

[Noah]

I am getting the hang of it. If I can, anyone can.

[Benji]

I think my brain is just too hardwired to think it'd be as simple as Civ's learning curve, but this game is monstrous. Will try the Irish count thing tonight, cheers.

[Sousa]

Start in Munster (Thormond)--that's the easiest place to start on Noob Island. You start controlling a county yourself, have another county as a vassal, and have a de jure claim on a third (since you're starting as a duke). It's fairly easy to plot to revoke Ormond from your vassal and therefore have a larger army under your control to take care of Desmond in the south. Once you have the whole duchy of Munster under your control, it's easy enough to swoop north into Connacht or Dublin. I suggest Dublin since it's got the most possible holdings of any county in Ireland. The rest of Ireland should be so busy bickering that they won't know what's what.

Really, it's a complicated game, but especially early on, you can get away with focusing on just one thing at a time to help make things easier.

[The Lusophone]

Just don't get involved in any of the foolishness that will surround and consume at least two of Scotland, England and France.

[MalaCloudy Black]

From the new patch notes:

– Now possible to search for trait names and last names in character finder.

Finally.

[The Lusophone]

Best. Fucking. Thing.

[Benji]

Man, I just really don't get this. I really want to, and I keep trying, but it's totally overwhelming, and I really can't be bothered sitting through two hours of videos just to understand what the heck I'm meant to be doing. I wish it had an option like Total War where there's a tutorial you can actually play as you go rather than a tutorial that tries to explain everything all at once without actually getting to play the game.

[Gazz]

Just remember its easiest to assassinate babies.

[MalaCloudy Black]

And keep your vassal opinion high or else it's easiest to assassinate you. Also it seems like 9 times out of 10 people have no problem killing women. The pregnanter, the better!

[Noah]

Playing the old gods and as Scotland. Actually doing quite well and taken some territory. Now I'm in a rut, going nowhere fast and nothing to do except make babies and fend off evil raiders.

[Noah]

So I'm noticing a sale on this game and all the dlc!

I'm about to get:

-Persian portraits and unit packs. 66c x2

-Turkish portrait and unit packs. 66c x2

-Warriors of Faith unit pack. 66c

-Military Orders unit pack. 66c

-Finno-Ugric unit pack. 66c

-Saxon unit pack. 66c

-Hymns of Abraham. 66c

-Songs of India. 66c

-Customization pack. $1.66

-Sons of Abraham. $3.33

-Rajas of India. $4.99

All up it's only $16.58 aud and it'll mean I'll have all the dlc that has been released.

My only regret is not having the money to buy Europa Universalis IV, when it was on sale recently(so yeah I didn't bother with the save converter as it kept the price under $17 and I wont be needing it anytime soon).

[apsham]

I think I have:

-Sons of Abraham. $3.33

-Rajas of India. $4.99

To pick up until I have all the meaningful DLC. Nice.

[MalaCloudy Black]

[Schlitzbrille]

GOD MORE CKII STUFF I'M JUST BARELY STARTING TO PROCESS HOW TO PLAY AND NOW I'VE GOT TO THINK ABOUT MORE SYSTEMS.

Can't wait. Maybe by the time it comes out I'll be done getting the current DLC.

[The Lusophone]

Charlemagne didn't found the Holy Roman Empire. That was Otto the Great in 962. Otto wasn't even a Carolingian.

Charlemagne was King of the Franks, King of the Lombards and was crowned (possibly against his will) 'Imperator', Emperor, but not Holy Roman Empire.

Plus his power base was not in Germany, but largely Frankish and although his capital Aachen is in Germany today, it is on the border with Alsace-Lorraine.

You disappoint me Paradox. :/

[Gazz]

The disappointing thing about this is it just allows you to play as an overpowered blob HRE under a different name and earlier.

[Sousa]

I hope you can evolve Charlemagne into Charlezard.