The BVS WWE: 2004-05

[9 to 5]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[grind your soul]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[TMM]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[DonaldMick]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[K.O.T.W]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

Edited November 26, 2004 by K.O.T.W

[oldskool]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm NOT NECESSARY

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[Nick Adams]

World Title: Y2J vs. RKO

- I'll go with Jericho. Why not?

IC Title: Storm takes the first two matches, making the third unncecessary. (I may not be that good with my RAW guesses, but I can count, and you've booked ten matches, one of which can be avoided).

World Tag Titles: I'll take Evolution.

Women's Title: Lexi, thanks.

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

- In the most depressing ending, Bischoff wins when he manages to sneak in a chair while the ref is out.

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

- Hmm...as much of an HBK mark as I am, Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

- Well, tapping signifies quitting...but Mondo is "Sick". I'll go with Benoit.

Kane vs. Christian

- Hmm...Kane. I am a total mark for Kane, evil or not.

[TheBookerMan69]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton- Chris Jericho

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm- Nowinski

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm- Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm- Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris- Batista and Shane

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy- Alexis

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff- Molly

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno- Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo- Mondo

Kane vs. Christian- Christian

[Jam]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm - Not Needed

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[Blehschmidt]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[Kane's Mullet Slacker]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo

Kane vs. Christian

[GCCWolverine]

World Title: Chris Jericho ©

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Lance Storm

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Lance Storm

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane ©

Women's Title: Tracy

Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit

Christian

[The Punisher]

World Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Randy Orton- Orton

Intercontinental Title #1 (Street Fight): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm- Nowinski

Intercontinental Title #2 (Submission): Chris Nowinski vs. Lance Storm- Storm

Intercontinental Title #3 (Ladder) (if necessary): Chris Nowinski © vs. Lance Storm- Nowinski

World Tag Team Titles: Batista and Michael Shane © vs. Sting and Chris Harris- Batista and Shane

Women's Title: Alexis Laree © vs. Trish Stratus vs. Tracy- Alexis Laree

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff- Eric Bischoff

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno- Shawn Michaels

I Quit Match: Chris Benoit vs. Nick Mondo- Benoit

Kane vs. Christian- Christian

[The Third Dukes]

The following is a special presentation of ABC Sports -- the Leader in Championship Television!

The intro to U2's "Vertigo" is on loop in the background, as shots of various wrestlers throughout RAW's split-brand history form the visual images that Mike Tirico is doing the voiceover for. At various times, we play a snippet from "Vertigo" that actually features the lyrics. That will be noted.

Tirico: "For years, the world of professional wrestling has revolved around destiny. Whether it's winning the Royal Rumble or King of the Ring, or even being in the right place at the right time, wrestlers build their careers around putting their destiny in their own hands."

Bono: "Uno, dos, tres, catorze..."

Tirico: "But after a controversial Unforgiven supershow, Stone Cold Steve Austin and the WWE decided they wanted change. They opened things up to the fans and asked for ideas. And the fans responded -- over half a million matches from almost 100,000 different cards, faxes, e-mails, and live events -- all asking for a chance to play matchmaker for one night."

Bono:

"Lights go down.

It's dark.

The jungle is your head

Can't rule your heart.

I'm feeling so much stronger

Than I thought.

Your eyes are wide,

And though your soul

It can't be bought,

Your mind can wander."

Tirico: "Tonight, the votes are in. Ten matches, each one a favorite of the fanbase, are on the offering. 19 wrestlers have had destiny picked for them by the people who pay to see their performance. And here on ABC, fans around America will see it all come to a head as the wrestlers experience what it's like to lose control and spin off into vertigo."

Bono:

"Hello, Hello -- Hola!

I'm at a place called vertigo. Donde esta?

It's everything I wish I didn't know,

Except you give me something I can feel --

Feel!"

Tirico: "When the people rule the WWE, there's only one thing to expect -- pure havoc! Halloween Havoc, only on ABC, is next!"

Bono: "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!"

THE FANS ALSO VOTED FOR US TO SPEND MILLIONS OF DOLLARS ON PYRO as we are live on ABC, BBC, CBC, and so on! Sign in the crowd: "Don't Blame Me, I Voted for Doink!"

Tirico: "We are coming to you live from the Bradley Center in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, for Halloween Havoc, the first ever completely interactive wrestling showcase! Hello, folks, I'm Mike Tirico, and tonight we have a real treat for you. WWE fan voting has put together tonight's ten-match spectacular, and all of the wrestlers in the back know they want to go all-out for the fans. I'm joined again by David Meltzer, and David, it appears that the fans have sent a message as to which rivalries are red-hot."

Meltzer: "Well, when the voting results were announced yesterday, the fans made clear which burning issues they wanted settled. For the past few weeks, there have been rivalries brewing. Lance Storm wants to prove he can take the Intercontinental Title from Chris Nowinski, and tonight they will meet two, maybe three times. Tracy Brooks and Trish Stratus are at odds over what appears to be the affections of a man, and tonight, those two will face not just each other, but Women's Champion Alexis Laree. And on top of that, you have Chris Benoit going one-on-one with Nick Mondo, the man he nearly crippled during a Last Man Standing match at Unforgiven."

CRASH!!!

Tirico: "And there's a familiar sound to wrestling fans, and a familiar face to people the world over. It's Stone Cold Steve Austin, now a member of the WWE's Board of Governors. This was his idea, David, and now he's going to give us a few opening remarks."

Meltzer: "And when Austin talks, you gotta believe people listen. He has decades of respect built up over the years -- arguably at his peak, he was the biggest thing in wrestling history. And now, he has authority, a sight that must frighten some of the people in the WWE."

Austin: "What? * What? * What? * What? * Can you hear me? * Can you hear me now? * Good. * Tonight * In This Very Ring * the matches all you people wanna see * are gonna be played out. * So on behalf of the WWE Competition Committee, * who really enjoys getting a vacation now and then * I wanna say thank you, * sit back, * relax, * open a beer, * open two beers, * and hurry cuz they stop selling beer at the intermission, * and enjoy your show. * And that's the Bottom Line, Cuz Stone Cold Said So!"

Tirico: "And with those inspiring words, we are ready to begin Halloween Havoc. Up first is the first of three possible matches between Lance Storm and Chris Nowinski, the Intercontinental Title to be awarded to the first man to two falls."

Meltzer: "And although many times these matches are one right after the other, because of a ruling by Austin before this match, these three matches will be held at three different times, meaning that the winner may not be known until the end of the show!"

Tirico: "In addition, none of these matches will be contested under standard rules. In all three matches, you cannot be disqualified, which means we will get a winner in all three cases. This first match is dubbed a street fight, which means you must win by pinfall. Here we go!"

Intercontinental Title Series, Round 1, Street Fight: Chris Nowinski (champion, 0) vs. Lance Storm (challenger, 0)

Nowinski (who was first out) pounds on Storm as he enters, sending him into the ropes and nailing a kneelift on the way back. He undoes his belt and measures Storm, who ducks the swing. Storm kicks Nowinski in the gut and DDTs him on the belt. Storm covers for two. Storm pounds Nowinski in the back of the neck before heading to the outside and getting a steel chair. Storm measures Nowinski, but Nowinski spears Storm's wide-open body and punches away. He picks Storm up and delivers a suplex before going to the top rope. He dives off with a kneedrop, but stalls for too long and can only get two. Nowinski pounds on Storm's back before sending him into the ropes and getting a dropkick.

He puts on a front chancery, turning it into a swinging neckbreaker as Storm stands up. Nowinski covers for two. Nowinski grabs the chair and waits for Storm to stand, planting him with a chairshot for two. Nowinski gets a Rude Awakening, and covers again, but pulls Storm up at two. Nowinski applies a camel clutch, but Storm is right next to the ropes and grabs them immediately. Nowinski drags him away and gets a brainbuster on Storm.

He covers again, but again it's a two-count. Nowinski puts Storm on the top rope and follows him up for a superplex, but Storm dives off the top and sunset flips Nowinski for two. Storm gets the belt and, as Nowinski pulls himself up, he whips Nowinski with it. Storm tosses the belt aside and tries for a superkick, but Nowinski ducks and grabs Storm in a German suplex for two. Nowinski stands behind Storm and grabs him in a sitdown neckbreaker (think reverse Rude Awakening). Nowinski covers, but it's still only two. Nowinski picks Storm up and nails him with an inverted DDT, but instead of covering goes for the chair.

He wraps it around Storm's neck and heads to the top rope. He dives, but Storm rolls away and Nowinski crashes to the mat. Storm then unwraps himself from the chair and smashes it into Nowinski's face. He waits for Nowinski to get up, then tosses the chair to him and superkicks it into Nowinski's face. He covers, and that earns him a three-count and the first fall.

WINNER of Round One: Lance Storm (8:23)

Tirico: "Lance Storm is now one win away from being crowned the new Intercontinental Champion! Chris Nowinski has his work cut out for him here!"

Meltzer: "And to make matters worse, the next match is a submission match. Lance Storm used a submission hold to become a Triple Crown champion in WCW, so Nowinski really needed this fall. He didn't get it, and it's gonna be an uphill struggle right now!"

Tirico: "Folks, let's go to the back, where Jonathan Coachman is standing by with Triple H, who it's fair to say has a vested interest in the next match. Jonathan?"

Coach: "Thank you, Mike. HHH, recently you and your girlfriend Trish Stratus have been on uneven terms, particularly due to the infatuations of Tracy. But where there's smoke, there's usually fire, so..."

HHH: "Are you asking if I'm cheating on my girl? Well, the answer is no, Coach. Never. I am loyal to her. I remained loyal to her during the time she was injured. This is nothing more than a mind game. If it takes every last ounce of energy I have, I will prove to her that I am legitimate. Trish and I will remain... because I am the Game."

Coach: "Thank you, HHH. Back to you, guys."

Tirico: "All right, David, it looks like our Triple Threat match for the Women's Championship is up next, and to clarify for those who are used to one on one matches, anybody can score a victory over anyone at any time, and the first person to get a pin will win the match, and in this case, the Women's Title."

Meltzer: "And normally, I'd say that puts the champ at a disadvantage, because she could lose her title without being involved in the decision, but given the level of animosity here between Trish and Tracy, two former friends, I would say the chances of some conspiracy-level title change are remote at best."

Women's Title match: Alexis Laree (champion) vs. Tracy (challenger) vs. Trish Stratus (challenger)

Trish goes straight at Tracy, pounding her head on the mat as Laree watches. Trish backs Tracy into the corner and pounds her with closed fists before chopping away at her chest. She sends Tracy into the opposite corner and tries to follow in with a handspring elbow, but backflips straight into a Laree release German suplex. Tracy covers, but it gets two. Tracy hammers on Trish, sending her into the corner and climbing up, trying a rana. But Laree is right behind her and backdrop suplexes her off of Trish.

Trish takes advantage and dives onto Tracy, choking her out, and the two women start a catfight. The referee tries to break it up, but a windup from Trish catches him in the eye. He staggers until Tracy kicks Trish into him, knocking him flat. Trish catches Tracy in the Stratusfaction bulldog, but Laree stops it and knocks both of them over.

HHH runs in from the back and attempts to hit Laree, but she yanks Trish into the way. As HHH stares in shock, Tracy walks up to him and kisses him. However, Laree rolls Tracy up from behind as the ref comes to, and that rollup gets the three-count.

WINNER and STILL Women's Champion: Alexis Laree (4:27)

Tirico: "That, I guess, is why Alexis Laree is the champion. She picked her spots and is still the top woman in the WWE."

Meltzer: "Exactly right. Trish and Tracy were too consumed with each other to make any headway on the Women's Champion, and in the end, she was able to parlay that into a W. Congratulations to her."

We head backstage, where Chris Jericho runs into Molly Holly.

Jericho: "Hey, lady. What's the deal?"

Molly: "It's not good. I just found out I've been voted as the special guest referee for a match tonight."

Jericho: "What's so bad about that?"

Molly: "It means I can't wrestle -- Eric is saying there's a law about that. I've gotta choose which thing I want to do."

Jericho: "And lemme guess... if you say no to refereeing, the match is out the window, right?"

Molly: "Yeah... and Kane's involved. I'd rather not be any more on his bad side than I already am."

Jericho: "Gee... that's too bad. I guess you really want a shot at my belt, huh?"

Molly: "It's not that! It's shutting Eric up. I just wish I could..."

She stops. The camera pulls back to show Stone Cold listening in.

Austin: "You know what? * That rule's pretty stupid. * So I'm killin' it tonight. * Go do both, Molly. * And give ol' Uncle Eric a Stunner for me, would ya?"

Molly: "Thanks."

Molly walks off, a smile on her face. Jericho rolls his eyes.

Jericho: "She just wants the title."

Back to ringside.

Tirico: "Big news coming down from Stone Cold there. Molly Holly will be the referee in Kane's match against Christian after all."

Meltzer: "And that's big because at Unforgiven and afterwards, Kane has tried everything in his power to mutilate Molly because of the sympathy she gets. Kane has been through a lot -- but so has Molly, and Kane can't accept that. Tonight, he has to keep it clean and take on a man who has come to Molly's aid -- Christian."

Tirico: "That's for later on, but first, we have another title match as Evolution's big man, Batista, and high flyer Michael Shane take on the legendary Sting and the Wildcat, Chris Harris."

Meltzer: "Sting has long been a popular man, so it's no surprise he's featured tonight, but he hasn't held tag gold in... I think about 10 years, Mike. Can he still do it?"

World Tag Team title match: Evolution (champions) vs. Sting and Chris Harris (challengers)

A huge brawl starts us off, with Harris working over Shane and Sting pounding away at Batista. The faces whip the heels together, and Batista runs over Shane without a scratch. However, Harris hits a leaping clothesline on Batista, who falls back into a German suplex from Sting. Shane is up and charges Harris, but Harris spears him back to the mat and punches away.

Meanwhile, Sting waits for Batista to rise in the corner and charges in with a Stinger Splash, but Batista ducks and Sting hits the post. Batista carries him out with a fireman's carry into a slam. Harris tosses Shane out and follows, so Batista and Sting are the legal men. Batista pounds Sting on the mat, then picks him up and tags in Shane.

Shane goes to the top rope as Batista slams Sting down. Shane hits a splash on Sting and holds on for the cover. It gets two. Shane forearms Sting a few times before sending him into the ropes. He hits a flying back elbow on Sting and covers again, but again it gets two. Shane tags Batista in, then sends Sting into the ropes. Batista hits a spinebuster on Sting on the way back. He covers for two. Batista pounds away on Sting before sending him into the corner. He takes a step back, then throws a right jab at Sting's face, levelling him.

Batista drags Sting to the center of the ring, but the cover only gets two. Batista gets frustrated and tags Shane in. Shane warms up the band as Sting comes to, but Shane's superkick is caught by Sting. He sweeps the other leg out, then turns Shane over into the Scorpion. Batista grabs Sting's head and DDTs him for the save, allowing Shane to reverse into a Sharpshooter of his own. This time, Harris enters via the top rope and gets a missile dropkick on Shane, causing another break and a Double KO.

Shane gets to Batista first, but Batista's charge is caught by Sting and turned into a backdrop. Sting stumbles over and tags in Harris. Harris enters with a springboard clothesline on Batista, then a pair of dropkicks. Shane enters, only to get caught with a lariat that turns him inside out. Harris superkicks Batista down, going to the top rope. He dives off with a big elbow and covers, but Shane saves at two.

Sting returns to hold Shane off while Harris sends Batista into the ropes and scores a Thesz Press. Sting sends Shane out as Harris whips Batista into the corner. Sting hits a Stinger Splash on Batista, but the referee escorts him out. Shane re-enters, but Harris catches him and delivers the Catatonic. Batista picks Harris up and goes for the Demon Bomb, but Sting clips Batista and Harris lands on top, hooking the legs. Sting pulls Shane out of the ring, and the referee counts the three for the title change.

WINNERS and NEW World Tag Team Champions: Sting and Chris Harris (10:54)

Tirico: "And just like that, we have new Tag Team champions! Chris Harris gets his first taste of gold here in the WWE, and he gets it with an icon of the business in Sting!"

Meltzer: "A little history, Mike -- back in 2002, Edge and Hulk Hogan were Tag Team champions, and a lot of people credit that reign with sending Edge to the heights he has reached today. Do you think this might do the same for Harris -- being associated in a winning team with a legend?"

Tirico: "It's entirely possible, David."

In-house advertisement...

Voiceover: "It is the most dangerous structure in the business."

JR: "A cross between Hell in a Cell, WarGames, Survivor Series tradition..."

Voiceover: "The brainchild of a mad genius."

Bischoff: "It's beautiful, isn't it?"

Voiceover: "A place where almost anything can happen."

Lawler: "The HeartBreak Kid is back!"

JR: "Look out! A fireball!"

Voiceover: "Six will enter. One will be the champion. It's the third annual Elimination Chamber! RAW and SmackDown! present WWE Survivor Series -- live on November 14, only on Pay-Per-View! Who will survive?"

Back to ringside.

Tirico: "That's a very difficult match for whoever gets involved in it, David. Steel mesh, plexiglass pods -- a lot can happen in there."

Meltzer: "Exactly right, Mike. Careers are made and broken in that environment. Kane became a legitimate threat that night last year and not just a dangerous man because he won the World Title and maintained it for four months. He is not a man to be treated with anything but respect and maybe fear."

Tirico: "And he is in our next match, as he will go one-on-one with Christian, but with Molly Holly calling the shots, do you think Kane will get a fair fight?"

Meltzer: "I'm not even sure he'll TRY."

With referee Molly Holly: Kane vs. Christian

Christian charges, but Kane simply throws him aside. A second charge is met with a big boot, and Kane begins to choke Christian down. Molly orders Kane to release the chokehold, and he stares at her as he does. Christian tries a clothesline, but it has no effect on Kane, who slaps Christian to the mat and chokes again. Molly again tells Kane to let go, but this time when he does, he grabs HER by the throat. Molly barely has time to call for the bell before the chokeslam.

WINNER by disqualification: Christian (1:53)

The beating continues in the ring, as Kane stands over Molly, waiting for her to get up. Christian tries to save, but Kane catches him in a Tombstone. Kane again lurks over Molly as Eric Bischoff comes out. With Eric cheering him on, Kane picks Molly up and drops her in a Burning Hammer. Kane sets off his pyro before leaving the ring, making sure to stare at Eric, who quickly stops cheering. EMTs begin to check Molly out to see is she's in any condition to continue.

Tirico: "Well, you hate to see something like this happen in any sport, and it appears that Kane will have to be dealt with for this... I just have to wonder if Molly will be in any condition to defend her dignity later tonight."

Meltzer: "And if I know Eric, he isn't about to call the match off, either. Odds are he's going to demand a win by forfeit, and that would be a shame."

Tirico: "Folks, let's go... let's go backstage to Jonathan Coachman, who's standing by with the Intercontinental Champion. Jonathan?"

Coach: "Chris Nowinski, you're down 1-0. The submission match is up next. Needless to say, this isn't your strength. Do you think you'll be able to win it?"

Nowinski: "Think? I know. If you were watching the first match, you'd know the same thing, too. I would explain, but I'd rather not tip off that idiot Storm any more than I would like to waste my breath on fans at home who couldn't do better than getting into some two-bit school like Marquette. They'll see my plan come to fruition. I'm not scared. Lance Storm... he should be."

Coach: "Back to the boys at ringside. Mike?"

Tirico: "All right, here we go, David. A submission match is just what it sounds like -- you have to apply a hold or other lock on your opponent and get them to concede the match."

Meltzer: "And for those at home who've never seen this, in the world of professional wrestling, there is a very specific way to indicate submission. Because words can be misheard, the man giving up will tap his hand on a surface -- which is why a submission is called a "tap-out" in wrestling circles. It can be the mat, it can be the opponent -- heck, you can tap one hand on the other if you're bent out of shape. So long as it's the tapping motion, it counts. You lose the match, but you could save yourself from major damage."

Tirico: "And if Lance Storm can make Chris Nowinski perform that motion tonight, he will walk away the Intercontinental Champion."

Intercontinental Title Series, Round 2, Submission Match: Chris Nowinski (champion, 0) vs. Lance Storm (challenger, 1)

They lock up, and Nowinski gets a headlock, working it in and adding a few punches to the face. He drops into a bulldog, then switches to a front chancery. Storm gets up quickly and slides out of it, grabbing Nowinski's leg in a legbar while checking his neck. Nowinski makes the ropes easily, and both men are up. Nowinski charges Storm and hits a knee to the face, then drops a knee on Storm's head. Nowinski goes for Al Snow's Beast Choker, but Storm rolls the pair over onto Nowinski's back and Nowinski instinctively breaks.

Storm tries to grab Nowinski's leg again, but Nowinski gets to a standing position. Storm gets a dragon screw, and Nowinski hobbles to the outside, trying to regain some feeling. He talks strategy with Teddy Long before re-entering the ring and ducking a lockup, pointing to his head. Storm is ready, though, and dropkicks Nowinski's leg out before picking it up and applying a half-crab. Nowinski manages to struggle all the way across the ring and barely makes the ropes in time, forcing Storm to break.

Nowinski thumbs Storm in the eye as they get up, then grabs Storm and connects with a half-nelson facebuster. Nowinski returns to a camel clutch, and Storm attempts to fight out of it, so Nowinski releases and drops down on Storm's back. Nowinski picks Storm up and tries for a piledriver, but Storm backdrops out of it. Storm stomps away on Nowinski's knee, then tries for a standing legbar, but Nowinski kicks Storm aside and into the referee.

With the ref down, Storm hooks up the Sharpshooter and Nowinski taps, but it's all meaningless. Storm sees that the ref is down and tries to revive him, but as he does, Nowinski grabs Storm from behind and hits a German suplex. He hangs on and actually connects with a second German suplex. He hangs on again, and the third German suplex connects.

Nowinski gets up and points to his head while shouting "Learn from the best", then grabs Storm and picks him up over his shoulder. Instead of a running powerslam, though, he drops Storm in Snake Eyes on the turnbuckle. He then grabs Storm from behind and slaps on a dragon sleeper. Storm fights for dear life, but Nowinski drops to one knee and makes a full bridge of Storm's body. Storm waves his arms for the ropes, but eventually, he taps his own leg to even the series.

WINNER of Round 2: Chris Nowinski (9:27)

Tirico: "It's all square, folks! Later tonight, we will have a ladder match to determine who truly is the Intercontinental Champion!"

Meltzer: "And if you remember that Nowinski said his plan was in effect... I saw it! Think back to the first match and all the work on the neck that Nowinski did. He was thinking ahead to the second match, where as you saw, he did more weakening of Storm's neck and wound up evening the series. You have to think he has the advantage entering Round 3."

Tirico: "It'll be hard to argue that. Also coming up, we will have Shawn Michaels taking on the sadistic Rhyno. Molly Holly -- will she be ready to face Eric Bischoff? And in our main event, it will be Chris Jericho defending the World Heavyweight Title against Randy Orton. Stay tuned, folks! We'll be right back after this halftime report!"

<<<INTERMISSION>>>

[K.O.T.W]

Now You're making us wait? Awww..

Pretty Good show so far, btw.

Edited November 30, 2004 by K.O.T.W

[The Third Dukes]

Tirico: "We are back for the second half of Halloween Havoc, and David, this is where the heavy hitters are going to come out, isn't it?"

Meltzer: "Traditionally, yes, Mike, the later you are in a show, the bigger the names you see, and this should be no exception. You're going to have the World Heavyweight Champion in Chris Jericho defending his title against Randy Orton. You'll have Shawn Michaels and Rhyno, two former champions in their own right, squaring off for another shot at glory. And above all, the Intercontinental Title rubber match between Chris Nowinski and Lance Storm will occur, and it's gonna be a ladder match -- one of the most exciting matches the WWE has to offer."

Tirico: "That of course will be later on, but first it appears we'll have a pair of men who have earned the respect of millions squaring off. It's the HeartBreak Kid Shawn Michaels ready to face Rhyno!"

Meltzer: "Rhyno is a dangerous individual, and his full-body attack, which he has nicknamed the Gore, is one that very few people have survived. But if anyone can bounce back, it's Shawn, who has made a career out of defying the odds."

Shawn Michaels vs. Rhyno

They lock up, and Shawn gets a headlock. Rhyno shoves him into the ropes and charges, but Shawn slides out of the ring. He slowly returns back in, and they lock up again. Shawn pushes Rhyno into the corner and gives him a clean break. Rhyno slaps Shawn, who begins a slugfest with Rhyno. Rhyno wins that easily and lifts Shawn over his head, dropping him in a powerslam on the way down. Rhyno covers for two.

Rhyno backs Shawn into the corner and thrusts his shoulder into Shawn's sternum. He sends Shawn to the opposite corner, where Shawn flips up into a sitting position. Rhyno gets on the second turnbuckle and tries a back superplex, but Shawn elbows him back down. Shawn then stands on the top turnbuckle and shoves himself backwards, landing a back elbow on Rhyno. He covers for two. Shawn stands up quickly and armdrags Rhyno, followed by a second one, then sends him into the corner.

Shawn charges in, but Rhyno flips Shawn over the top of the turnbuckle and all the way down. Rhyno follows him to the outside and beals him straight into the steel steps. Back in, Rhyno stalks Shawn and charges, but Shawn vaults him and Rhyno crashes into the turnbuckle. Shawn grabs Rhyno in a German suplex with a bridge, but it only gets two. Shawn maintains the advantage, hitting a dropkick on Rhyno, then grabbing Rhyno in a vertical suplex. He rolls through with it, then hooks Rhyno's leg and connects on a fisherman's suplex. It gets two. Shawn slugs Rhyno in the head as he picks him up, then sends him into the ropes, getting a spinkick on the way out.

Shawn picks Rhyno up and slams him down in the center of the mat, then climbs to the top rope. He signals for the flying elbow, but as he flies, Rhyno rolls aside and Shawn crashes to the mat. Rhyno grabs Shawn and presses him over his head, but Shawn slides down the back and gets a rolling reverse cradle on Rhyno. It gets two before Rhyno kicks out. Shawn dives over Rhyno in a sunset flip try, but Rhyno sits down to block for two. Shawn then completes it, but that gets two.

Rhyno and Shawn get up, and Rhyno hits Shawn with a Northern Lights suplex for two, but Shawn kips up and catches a rising Rhyno with a backslide for another two. Both men try clotheslines at the same time, and both men fall down. Rhyno gets up first and waits for Shawn to stand, charging as he does so. Shawn, however, drops down and holds the top rope, sending Rhyno flying over it. As Rhyno collects himself on the outside, Shawn goes to the top rope. He dives off onto Rhyno, landing a series of punches on the outside. Shawn throws Rhyno back in and cues up the band.

Rhyno senses it and charges Shawn out of a crouched position. Shawn's superkick hits Rhyno's GORE, and the collision sends both men flying. Shawn is off-balance and falls out of the ring, while Rhyno is loopy and falls into a corner. Neither man moves, but since Shawn is outside the ring, the referee's ten count applies to him and not Rhyno, ending the match.

WINNER by countout: Rhyno (12:06)

Tirico: "And this match comes to an unfortunate end, as Shawn Michaels could not answer the bell... well, neither could Rhyno, but Shawn was outside the ring, and that's a loss."

Meltzer: "You don't like to see matches end that way, especially between two of the top stars like Shawn Michaels and Rhyno are. I have a feeling we'll see them go at it again."

Tirico: "It would be a pleasure. Folks, we have Jonathan Coachman once again standing by, this time with Chris Benoit and Eric Bischoff. Jonathan?"

Coach: "Eric, it appears that Kane has helped you out in a way that is very unexpected tonight."

Bischoff: "That's right, and let me tell you something else. What you will witness tonight in these next few matches will be nothing less than the greatest display of Evolution's dominance. Sure, we lost a belt earlier -- but no one will remember that when we're done. First, it's going to be the Crippler, Chris Benoit, my prize star, dismantling Nick Mondo and making him utter words he didn't know he could -- I Quit. Then, assuming Molly even wants to show up, I will take on myself personally to scoop up what little is left of her and end her dreams. And finally, Randy Orton will become the youngest World Heavyweight Champion ever when he takes pure gold from Chris Jericho. Tell 'em what it's all about, Chris."

Benoit: "Mondo -- I destroyed you before. It will happen again. Molly -- you made me the animal I am. Now I will delight in your destruction. And Jericho -- keep the title warm. It's coming right here."

Bischoff: "Evolution, going for gold! Let's go, Chris!"

Coachman: "Back to you at ringside, boys."

Tirico: "Okay, thank you, Jonathan, and from that interview, I guess it's time to see the I Quit match. David, what makes this match different from the submission match we saw earlier?"

Meltzer: "Well, in the submission match, you could only lose by tapping out, as we discussed earlier. But in an I Quit match, you don't have to tap out. You can also say the words "I Quit" -- either to the referee or to your opponent. It has become somewhat standard for the in-house speaker system to play a part in the match, as often opponents will go for maximum humiliation by making their beaten foe say the magic words into a microphone for the entire audience to hear and understand."

I Quit Match: Nick Mondo vs. Chris Benoit

Mondo hits Benoit and Bischoff with a dive as they approach the ring. He pounds both men in turn, then picks them up and knocks their noggins together. Mondo tosses Benoit in the ring and picks him up in a tilt-a-whirl slam. He goes to the outside and tosses a chair into the ring before arriving with the microphone. Benoit has the chair, though, and swings, but Mondo ducks, then boots the chair into Benoit's face.

"Say it, Chris! C'mon!"

"No way."

Mondo pounds Benoit with the microphone repeatedly, then switches to the chair and cracks it over Benoit's head, knocking him into the ropes. Mondo goes to the top and delivers the Sledgehammer legdrop to Benoit before returning to the ring and grabbing the microphone again.

"How about now, Benoit?"

But Benoit pokes Mondo in the eyes and grabs him from behind, launching him in a German suplex to the outside of the ring. Benoit takes the microphone and follows, whipping Mondo with it before kicking Mondo in the ribs.

"Got somethin' to say, Nick?"

"Yeah -- GO TO HELL!"

Benoit drops the mic and picks Mondo up, looking for a brainbuster on the floor. Mondo slips out the back and throws Benoit into the guardrail, then tosses him onto the steps. Back in the ring, Mondo goes to the top rope and dives for M.Bison, but Benoit sidesteps. When Mondo lands on his feet, Benoit chops him into the corner, and a few more times once there. Benoit sends Mondo chest-first into the opposite turnbuckle, then hooks a German suplex. He rolls through it and gets a second German suplex. He rolls through with that and gets a third German suplex. He then one-ups Nowinski by rolling through and connecting with a fourth German. He rolls through one last time and nails Mondo with another German suplex. Benoit catches the mic Bischoff throws to him.

"You want some more, Nick? Just tell me and I'll stop!"

Mondo grabs the arm and uses it to pull himself up, then picks Benoit up and hits an inverted atomic drop. He backs up and lariats Benoit to the mat. Mondo goes to the outside to retrieve the chair, then back in the ring, he levels Benoit with a shot. He goes to the top rope and, after pointing skyward like Sabu, Mondo dives off for the Arabian facebuster, but Benoit rolls aside. Mondo gets up and checks his leg, so Benoit trips Mondo up and laces on the Sharpshooter. Mondo tries to crawl to the ropes, but they're too far away. The chair, however, is right there, and Mondo grabs that first. He takes the chair and jams it into Benoit's leg until Benoit falls over. Mondo then is able to reverse the hold, but Benoit is much closer to the ropes on his end and makes them easily. Mondo picks the chair up as Benoit limps to his feet, then swings and appears to connect with Benoit, who tries to shield his head with his hand before falling down. Mondo grabs the mic and hovers over Benoit.

"How about now? What you gotta say for yourself?"

Mondo sticks the mic in Benoit's face, but Benoit grabs that arm and pulls Mondo down with it, into the Crippler Crossface. Mondo struggles to find the ropes, but Benoit rolls the pair into the center of the ring. Mondo grits his teeth to hold on, while Bischoff jumps into the ring and grabs the microphone.

"What are you gonna say, Nick?"

"No! Do your worst!"

Bischoff pounds the top of Mondo's head with the microphone as the thud rings throughout the arena.

"Say it, Nick!"

"Never!"

Bischoff continues to pound away as Benoit smiles and leans back even more.

"Say it, Nick!"

"NOOOO!"

Benoit releases the hold and applies an STF instead, leaving Mondo's face open for Bischoff to hit it more easily with the microphone.

"Say it, Nick!"

"I... I..."

"COME ON!"

Mondo reaches to break the hold, but Benoit grabs that arm and puts the Crossface on it. Mondo's other arm is limp, and his eyes appear to be glazed.

"Say it, Nick!"

"I... iquit."

WINNER: Chris Benoit (15:38)

Benoit gets up and stares at Mondo, smiling. Mondo is immobile as Bischoff smiles broadly.

Bischoff: "One down, two to go! Let's make it a very special night indeed! Oh, and Chris, since you're such a great and powerful technical wrestler, remind me to give you a shot at the World Heavyweight Championship down the line. After all, after I'm done with Molly -- assuming she bothers to show up -- I won't need to give it to her. Yeah, look at all the EMTs checking on poor ol' Sick Nick. I bet he's really sick now -- sick of himself! You all heard him! He quit! He's a quitter! This is the man who survived the ultimate combat zones in Philadelphia? This man couldn't last with Chris Benoit? What a loser! No wonder he's lying flat on his back right now. But he won't be the only one flat on a back as a result of tonight -- ain't that right, Molly? I'm gonna leave you breathless at how awesome I really am! So as these losers are taking poor ol' Mondo away, how about you come on out here and face a real man -- a man who would love nothing more than to destroy you?"

We wait. We see the EMTs rolling Mondo behind the curtain, but there's no sign of Molly.

Bischoff: "Oh well... ya know what? I think she's still in the hospital. C'mon, Chris, let's go see Nick off, shall we? We got all the time in the world."

Bischoff drops the mic, and he and Benoit walk to the back through the curtain. We switch to a camera following Benoit and Bischoff as they trail the Mondo stretcher. Benoit peels off at the Evolution locker room, with Bischoff giving his blessing. Mondo arrives at the ambulance just outside the arena loading dock. The EMTs are about to open the door when Bischoff signals for them to stop.

Bischoff (smiling): "Allow me, boys."

He opens the ambulance doors wide...

...and out from the ambulance flies Molly, springing forward and tackling Bischoff to the ground. Molly slugs away at Bischoff as officials spread in all directions. Molly grabs Bischoff by the hair and flings him into a nearby stack of wooden pallets. She then picks him up and grabs him in a headlock.

Molly: "What's the matter, Uncle Eric? Scared to see me? C'mon, we got a match to do!"

Molly walks Eric back as Eric tries to fight his way out of the headlock. As they pass the Evolution locker room, however, Benoit re-emerges and clotheslines down Molly. He stares at her, smugly, before turning around and getting pasted by an off-camera Shawn Michaels' Sweet Chin Music. However, the shot is enough for Bischoff to have the advantage. He chokes down Molly on the concrete, then picks her up by the hair and drags her caveman-style towards the ring. He stops her on the outside and props her up against the railing, before adopting a martial arts pose and going for a thrust kick. Molly catches it and uses the leg to pull Bischoff in closer before dropping down and low blowing him with gusto. Eric hops around in pain until Molly tosses him into the ring.

Molly Holly vs. Eric Bischoff

Molly stands over Eric, who begs off. She tells him to get up, then hits a seated dropkick to his face when he doesn't. Molly picks Eric up and snap suplexes him, then grabs his arm and does her spinning arm wrenches. She picks Bischoff up while holding the arm and kicks it a few times. She then pulls the arm into a Crippler Crossface, and Bischoff does a very fast submission.

WINNER: Molly Holly (1:34)

Molly then sees the microphone Bischoff dropped. She picks it up.

Molly: "Oh, Chris? About your title shot from Eric -- take a number. I'm in line too."

Tirico: "What a slaughter! Eric Bischoff may not be a trained fighter, but I think he's learned the hard way that Molly Holly is indeed that good."

Meltzer: "She definitely is that good -- she's seen as the best women's wrestler outside of Japan right now, and that's not a backhanded compliment either. Molly Holly has worked her way up to the point that she is a legitimately tough person to defeat."

Tirico: "Folks, as you can see in the ring right now, technicians have lowered a hook to about -- I'd say ten to twelve feet above the ring. They will place the Intercontinental Title upon that hook, and whoever of our next two competitors -- Chris Nowinski the champion or Lance Storm the challenger -- can get that belt first will win the match, and with it the Intercontinental Title."

Meltzer: "This is what the fans wanted most of all. The Intercontinental Title has been on the line in ladder matches many times before, and each time it has not failed to come through. Shawn Michaels and Scott Hall had a pair of trend-setting ladder matches for this belt in 1994 and 1995. The Rock and Triple H went from stars to superstars after their match in 1998. Edge and Christian in 2001 fought a brutal ladder match for this belt. When you say "ladder match", you often think "instant classic".

Tirico: "These two men have met twice tonight. Now, it all comes down to one final match. Here we go! The Intercontinental Title quite literally hangs in the balance above the ring."

Intercontinental Title Series, Round 3, Ladder Match: Chris Nowinski (champion, 1) vs. Lance Storm (challenger, 1)

The two men circle, but Nowinski ducks out of the ring and makes a break for the ladder, with Storm in hot pursuit. Nowinski grabs the ladder, but Storm pounds on Nowinski as the two duke it out in the aisle. Nowinski goes low on Storm to take the advantage, then nails Storm between the legs with the ladder. Nowinski snapmares Storm onto the ladder, then drops an elbow on Storm. Nowinski tosses Storm aside and picks the ladder up, carrying it back in front of him, but Storm dropkicks the ladder into Nowinski's face.

Storm grabs the ladder and slides it into the ring before returning to Nowinski, tossing him into the guardrail. Storm climbs the opposite guardrail in the aisle and dives off onto Nowinski with a clothesline. Storm rolls Nowinski back in the ring and follows him in with a springboard legdrop. Storm grabs the ladder and, after adding a shot to Nowinski with it, sets it up in the middle of the ring. He begins to climb, but as he does, Nowinski grabs him from behind and German suplexes him off. Storm grabs the neck, so Nowinski clubs the back of Storm's neck and picks Storm up by the hair.

He slams Storm's head into the ladder, then throws Storm into the turnbuckles and begins to climb the ladder. Storm climbs the turnbuckle ahead of Nowinski and dives off, hitting Nowinski with a missile dropkick to knock him off the ladder. Storm jumps onto Nowinski, hitting his leg with closed fists. He pulls Nowinski up in a half-crab, but submissions are meaningless and there's no referee. Nowinski uses the ropes to pull himself into a standing position, then launches himself with an enzuigiri to the back of Storm's head (!!).

Nowinski crawls over and sets up the ladder, beginning to climb. Storm grabs Nowinski from behind, however, and laces up a full nelson, hitting a release dragon suplex off the ladder on Nowinski. Storm stays down, grabbing his neck as he rolls onto his hands and knees, then gets up to his feet. He grabs the ladder to set it up, but Nowinski is up on the other side and shoves the Storm/ladder combo over, with the ladder landing on Storm. Nowinski goes to the top rope, then drops a knee on the ladder, which is on Storm.

Nowinski rolls around in pain for a few seconds before getting up and shaking the feeling back into his leg. He picks the ladder up and sets it up, but as soon as he does, Storm trips him with a drop toehold. Storm quickly grabs Nowinski's knee and drops it on the mat. He turns Nowinski over and picks the leg up again, but this time, Nowinski kicks Storm off and into the ladder. Nowinski limps to his feet, grabbing Storm and slamming him onto the ladder. He picks the ladder out from underneath Storm and sets it up, preparing to climb it.

He gets near the top when Storm shoves the ladder over, sending Nowinski into the ropes and tying his leg up in them as he falls to the inside. Storm grabs the ladder and charges, butting Nowinski in the kneecap but freeing him in the process. Storm heads outside the ring and leans the ladder against a ringpost. He returns, only to be hit with a guillotine kick as he enters the ring. Nowinski hobbles around to recover, then sees Storm hung on the ropes and tries a Bossman straddle, but Storm moves and Nowinski hurts the knee some more.

Storm then drags Nowinski to the corner where the ladder is waiting. He goes outside and wraps Nowinski's legs around both the post and the ladder. He then jumps up and puts on a figure-four-type hold on Nowinski, who screams in pain. After about 30 seconds of applying the hold, Storm lets go and untangles the ladder. He returns to the ring with the ladder, setting the ladder up in the ring.

Storm begins to climb it, but Nowinski drags himself to the center of the ring as Storm is near the top. Nowinski knocks the ladder away, so Storm grabs the hook and hangs on. Nowinski pulls himself up and grabs Storm, with both men dangling until Storm loses his grip and they both crash to the mat. Both men slowly pull themselves up and go for the ladder at the same time.

The ladder is set up perpendicular to the stage, and Storm climbs with his back to the entranceway as Nowinski climbs facing it. As they climb, Nowinski winces, then motions to the back. Storm is almost at the top when Rodney Mack enters the ring and climbs behind Storm. Nowinski braces the ladder as Mack yanks Storm off the ladder and applies the Blackout. Nowinski then slowly climbs, weakened but otherwise unimpeded, and manages to unhook and retain his Intercontinental Title.

WINNER of Round 3 AND the Series and STILL Intercontinental Champion: Chris Nowinski (18:11)

Tirico: "Did it HAVE to end like this? An exciting contest ruined by Rodney Mack as he throws the match in favor of his former tag team partner, Chris Nowinski!"

Meltzer: "I can't say as I agree, but fortunately, I'm not the only one -- look at this!"

In the ring, as Nowinski and Mack double-team Storm, Booker T enters. He pulls Mack away from Storm and gives him the Bookend. Meanwhile, Nowinski hits Storm with the Cactus DDT and celebrates, arms extended. He doesn't see Scott Hall enter, so Hall picks Nowinski up back-to-back with the arms in perfect position to deliver the Razor's Edge -- which he does. Hall's music plays as Hall and Booker help Storm up.

Tirico: "Looks like Storm has a few friends of his own, eh, David?"

Meltzer: "It goes beyond that, Mike. Scott Hall lost $250,000 worth of jewelry to Chris Nowinski in a ladder match in June. He hasn't forgotten it, and I guarantee you he wants to make sure Nowinski regrets winning unfairly."

Tirico: "Folks, there's only one match left, and it's the main event! Chris Jericho faces Randy Orton for the World Heavyweight Championship! That comes up next after this commercial break."

***COMMERCIAL***

World Heavyweight Title match: Chris Jericho (champion) vs. Randy Orton (challenger)

They lock up. Jericho gets a headlock, but Orton shoves him off. The collision produces a stalemate. They lock up again, and this time Orton gets a headlock on Jericho. Jericho lifts him up into a back suplex, but Orton shifts the weight and stays on his feet. Jericho gets the back suplex on the second try, however, and covers Orton with one foot. At two, Orton grabs that leg and twists as Jericho falls to the mat in pain.

Orton slams the knee into the ground a few times before applying a legbar. Orton, being near the ropes, uses them for leverage as Jericho screams in pain. Jericho manages to trip Orton up and get on the attack as they both stand, chopping away. He sends Orton into the ropes and hits a back elbow on the way out. Jericho drops an elbow on Orton, then picks him up and hits a snap suplex. As Orton makes his way to his feet, Jericho springs off the ropes and dropkicks him to the mat.

Orton pulls his way up again, but Jericho hits him with the facejam. Jericho tries the Lionsault, but Orton gets his knees up and Jericho is clutching his ribs in pain. Orton goes back to the leg, applying a spinning toehold and dropping down to torque the calf. Jericho fights the pain, but in doing so his shoulders fall to the mat for a two-count. Jericho reaches for the ropes and makes them, however, forcing a break. Orton pulls Jericho up for a DDT, but Jericho grabs Orton's legs and turns him over into the Walls of Jericho.

Orton begins to scramble for the ropes, making them with urgency. Jericho breaks, then charges, but Orton pulls the top rope down and Jericho flies to the outside. Orton follows him out there, rolling him back in quickly. In the ring, Orton grabs the injured leg of Jericho and whoos to the crowd, but while winding up the figure-four, Orton is cradled by Jericho for two. Orton hops back up and lariats Jericho down. He picks Jericho up and connects with the Play of the Day on Jericho. He covers, but it gets two. Orton sets Jericho up for the RKO, but Jericho shoves Orton aside and into the referee.

With the referee down, Orton clips Jericho and motions to the back. Chris Benoit makes an appearance, brandishing a chair. He enters the ring, and Orton and Benoit set Jericho's leg up for a Pillmanizing. However, as Benoit lurks over Jericho, Shawn Michaels enters the ring and tackles Orton down. He then pulls Benoit aside and pounds on him as Jericho untangles the chair from his leg. Michaels tosses Benoit to the outside as Jericho encourages him, and before the ref can get up, Michaels dives over the top and flattens Benoit on the outside. Jericho turns around, but runs right into a chairshot from Orton -- of course, the ref saw that.

WINNER by disqualification and STILL World Heavyweight Champion: Chris Jericho (10:52)

Orton continues to pound on Jericho with the chair, oblivious to the bell, as Benoit returns to the ring. Benoit goes up to the top rope, ready to deliver the swandive headbutt, but Molly Holly appears out of nowhere and shoves Benoit down. Michaels returns to the ring as the faces launch a comeback, sending Orton packing. Molly and Benoit have a staredown, but that's interrupted when Rhyno charges into the ring and GORES both of them. Rhyno stares at his work before being superkicked by Michaels. Michaels celebrates, but as he does, Orton gives him the RKO. Orton gets up, only to walk into a chairshot from Jericho, who stands tall in the center of the ring. As he does, though, Benoit gets up and spins him around. Soon, Orton is up, too, but when things look bad for Jericho...

CRASH!!!

Yup, here's Steve Austin to make one last trip to the ring. He stares all three men down as Orton gets in his face. Orton pokes at Austin, saying "You were, old man; I am. Get out of the way."

KICK WHAM STUNNER~!

So much for Austin getting out of the way. As he drops down and yells at Orton, Jericho tosses Benoit over the top rope. Michaels comes to and sees the carnage, but before he can react, Eric Bischoff heads to the ring.

Bischoff: "Wait, wait, wait... what is all this? Austin, get out of my ring! C'mon now! Or have you forgotten? The show is now over, and I'm back in charge."

Austin reluctantly steps aside, smirking as Michaels helps Molly to her feet.

Bischoff: "Now, Chris Jericho... you were lucky tonight that the referee had selective vision. But it won't be that easy at Survivor Series. You see, when I realized I HAD to give this girl over here a title shot, I remember the fastest way to preventing any one person from winning a match -- and that is, flood it with so many people that anything can happen. And with Survivor Series just around the corner, Chris... well, the little melee you just had inspired me. So, Jericho, prepare to re-enter the most dangerous structure on earth.

At Survivor Series, it'll be you, Molly, Shawn Michaels, Rhyno, Randy Orton, and Chris Benoit -- in the ELIMINATION CHAMBER!"

The crowd cheers this as Jericho looks around, half-nervous. Austin then re-enters the ring.

Austin: "Well, that's all well and good there, son, but now I suggest you get yourself out of this here ring before ol' Stone Cold finds a way to kick it out."

Bischoff: "No, no, no... you know the rules, Steve... you can't touch anyone unless they do it first."

Austin: "Yea, you're right there... I can't. But I ain't the only one in this ring, and if my ol' noggin's still workin' the way it oughta, I reckon there's someone here who owes you a little somethin' right about now."

At the word "now", Molly spins Bischoff around and gives him a KICK WHAM STUNNER of her own. With Bischoff down, Austin leans over him.

Austin: "Looks like you just got beat by a girl, Eric. And that's the Bottom Line, Cuz Stone Cold Said So!"

The glass crashes as Austin's music plays. Austin calls for a few (dozen) beers, and he, Molly, Jericho, and Michaels share a toast.

Tirico: "After a long night, we have seen what the fans can produce, and it's clear that the people's voice is stronger than ever! This has been a presentation of ABC Sports, the Leader in Championship Television! For more information, log on to ABCSports.com or WWE.com, the official website of World Wrestling Entertainment. For David Meltzer, I'm Mike Tirico, saying so long everyone from Halloween Havoc!"

<<<FIN>>>

[grind your soul]

Sorry, Dukes, but that was, by far, the worst major show you've ever done.

Disappointing matches, bad results, booking was off.

..you sure this isn't the REAL WWE that's going on here?

I can understand why you did [it's on free TV, and thus unsatisfying endings are a norm], but.. it just seemed like a collassal [sp] trainwreck from start to finish.

And no, this has nothing to do with my horrible predictions.

[Ace]

Well I got 6 but I don't think that show was actually that bad. Sting and Harris winning the belts was a surprise but everything else was a given.

[The Third Dukes]

First, I'd like to thank all EIGHTEEN people who entered the contest. Yes, you heard me -- that's one off the BVS record, set at No Mercy 2003. Wow. Of course, a similar prize was on the line. So maybe... eh.

And yeah, the card was off. I was trying to do the "introduce new viewers to everyone and not ruin too much credibility" thing, and it failed. Sorry.

Average score: 5.1. Kind of a bizarre score, but this was kind of a bizarre card... read on...

*****

- The SmarK Rant for Halloween Havoc, held Oct. 19 / 04.

- Live from Milwaukee, WI.

- Your Canadian hosts are Michael Landsberg and Rowdy Roddy Piper.

- Man, I never thought I'd have to do this again. After the roll that the WWE had been on, I would've thought they'd learn. But this show was so bizarre, so disgusting, so unfulfilling, that there's really only one way I can tell you how I felt. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...

- *drum roll*

- THE HOT POKER UP THE ASS RATING SYSTEM! See, when I'm truly pissed off at a show and star ratings just don't make it perfectly clear, I will metaphorically shove hot pokers up someone's ass to make them suffer an equal amount of pain to what I've been through. In this case, I'm targetting Eric Bischoff, who (let's face it) should've received the pokering for destroying WCW. If Vince Russo were around, I'd have pokered him.

- And we start with an easy target, as Steve Austin welcomes us to the event and encourages everyone to sit back and order a cold one. 3 hot pokers for encouraging people to get drunk.

- Opening match, Round One: Chris Nowinski v. Lance Storm. This is a Street Fight, and unless they were going for irony, let's give Uncle Eric two more hot pokers for booking two non-street-fighters in this match. I've seen Lance's chairshots in ECW -- the crowd hated them. And when an ECW crowd boos chairshots, something is wrong. Nowinski jumps the gun to start and hits a kneelift, then misses a beltshot. Storm gets a DDT on the belt for two. Chair time, but before Storm can swing and embarrass himself, Nowinski gets a spear. Suplex and flying kneedrop gets two. Dropkick and swinging neckbreaker follow, for two. Greco-Roman chairshot gets two. Rude Awakening, but Nowinski pulls him up. Camel clutch, but Storm is in the ropes. Brainbuster for two. A superplex is blocked, so Storm gets a flying sunset flip for two. Catch-as-catch-can belt-whipping cues the comeback. Superkick is blocked, and Nowinski gets a German suplex for two. Bizarre neckbreaker thing gets two. Inverted DDT and Nowinski gets the chair, but he can't Pillmanize Storm's neck with it. Storm with the chairshot (still as bad as ever) and a Van Daminator gets the pin at 8:23. Really didn't play to either man's strength, and why did Storm win the street fight? He's just going to lose the submission match. *3/4 Another poker for Storm's chairshot, of course.

- Women's title: Alexis Laree v. Tracy v. Trish Stratus. I appreciate the effort put on here, and I won't blame the fans for this, but triple threat matches have NEVER been fun. Ever. Trish opens a can of whoop-ass on Tracy, but Laree flings Trish mid-handspring in a cool spot. Tracy steals a cover for two. Frankensteiner try for Tracy is blocked by Laree, who gets a back suplex. A catfight breaks out, bumping the referee. 2 more pokers for a ref bump caused by a woman. I mean, COME ON. Bulldog is blocked as HHH runs in and accidentally nails Trish. Tracy with the LIPLOCK OF DOOM, but Laree rolls her up for the pin at 4:23. Was there a point? 1/4*

- Meanwhile, Austin informs us that Molly will be doing double duty tonight, refereeing a match and wrestling Eric Bischoff. Exposition between Jericho and Molly establishes that Molly wasn't sure which way she would have leaned.

- World Tag Team titles: Batista and Michael Shane v. Sting and Chris Harris. Piper compares the Sting/Harris team to Edge and Hogan from No Mercy, further proving he's completely senile. 4 more pokers to Bischoff for Piper having no sense of perspective. Hey, when you become an international bestselling author, you can invent your OWN sadistic rating system and use it however the hell you like, okay? Good. It's a Big-Ass Brawl to start, with one cute bit: the faces whip the heels together, and Batista no-sells while Shane oversells. Harris sends Batista into a suplex from Sting, then spears Shane. Stinger Splash on Batista misses, and the little guys bail out so Sting is YOUR Crow-in-Peril. Another poker for having Sting wrestle most of the match when Harris is RIGHT THERE. Slam/splash combo by the heels gets two. Flying back elbow by Shane gets two. MAIN EVENT SPINEBUSTER gets two. A huge shot to the jaw gets two. Who does Batista think he is, Mike Barton? Sting catches the superkick and goes for the Sharpshooter, but Batista DDTs Sting and Shane reverses. RING THE BELL, RING THE FU... sorry, wrong relative. Harris with a beautiful missile dropkick to break THAT up, and it's a Double KO. Hot tag Harris, who enters with Air Pillman and dropkicks everyone. Big elbow gets two for Batista. It's BONZO GONZO as Sting hits the Stinger Splash on Batista and Harris gets the Catatonic on Shane. Batista tries the Demon Bomb, but Sting clips him and Harris falls on top for the pin and the titles at 10:54. Ending came out of nowhere, but other than that a nice little tag match. **1/2

- Christian v. Kane. Molly is YOUR special referee. Kane pounds on Christian and chokes him, and Molly orders a release. Kane no-sells a clothesline and chokes some more, and this time when Molly orders a break, Kane beats her up for the DQ at 1:53. Not even a match. DUD Tombstone to Christian and Burning Hammer to Molly as everyone goes quiet. 3 more hot pokers for wasting Christian.

- Round Two: Chris Nowinski v. Lance Storm. This is a submission match. The announcers point out Storm is a huge favorite in this style, because he uses submission holds regularly and Nowinski doesn't. Nowinski starts with a headlock and bulldog, into a front chancery, continuing the neckwork from the first match. Storm gets a legbar so he can stall and check his neck for damage. Nowinski breaks, then USES THE KNEE~! with a running knee to the face and kneedrop. Beast Choker (with Piper pointing out that that's usually Al Snow's move), but Storm rolls Nowinski onto his back, causing a break. Um, how? There are no pinfalls. Two pokers for a contrived spot. Storm with a dragon screw as Nowinski limps on the outside. Nowinski ducks a lockup and tells us how smart he is (more heels NEED to do that), but Storm with a basement dropkick and half-crab. Nowinski reaches the ropes. Thumb to the eye by Nowinski (as Landsberg asks Piper if it looks familiar), and the Stroke follows. Camel clutch again, but Nowinski breaks and drops on Storm's back. Piledriver (normally illegal, but it's a submission match), but Storm fights out of it. Nowinski kicks Storm into the ref, earning another 2 pokers for the inevitable spot where Nowinski taps and the ref doesn't see it. And sure enough, Storm has a Sharpshooter, and Nowinski taps, but it doesn't count. Storm goes to wake the ref up, but Nowinski catches him from behind with the rolling Germans. Another poker for stealing from other people's work, and it would have been 3 if Nowinski didn't at least say he was learning from the best. That's right, Benoit rules. Snake Eyes (well, Nash doesn't rule) and dragon sleeper get the tap at 9:27. So Nowinski stole from HHH, Nash, Benoit, Piper, and Snow in one match, meaning I dislike his strategy by a vote of 3-2. ***

- At the half, Piper does a Tale of the Tape on Jericho and Orton, making sure to make fun of Cowboy Bob as often as possible. 3 more pokers for referencing someone nobody in today's audience has heard of.

- Shawn Michaels v. Rhyno. Piper insinuates that Rhyno is a convert to the Church Severe Butt-Kicking. Senility is not a toy, people. Shawn bails early, fearing the GOAR, and back in, another lockup leads to a slugfest. Rhyno with a press into powerslam for two after winning it, and some shoulder thrusts follow. Shawn flips to the top turnbuckle, but catches Rhyno and hits a flying back elbow for two. A series of armdrags send Rhyno reeling, but Shawn misses a blind charge and does the Holy Shit Bump. Into the STEEL steps, and back in, a GOAR try -- but Shawn leapfrogs it and Rhyno crashes. Shawn with a German suplex for two. Dropkick, and a suplex into fisherman's suplex gets two. Spinkick follows, then the big elbow... but it misses. Rhyno tries a press slam, but Shawn slides down the back and a pinfall reversal sequence breaks out, leading to a double clothesline. Not bad. Rhyno charges and flies out of the ring, and Shawn follows with a pescado. Back in the ring, Shawn warms up the band, but Sweet Chin Music meets Sweet GOAR Music and both men are out. Shawn's outside the ring and Rhyno's inside it, though, so Rhyno wins by countout at 12:06. Cute finish. Bad, but cute. Otherwise a good match, so we'll only go 2 hot pokers for the ending. ***1/4

- "I Quit" match: Chris Benoit v. Nick Mondo. Piper explains the difference between Submission and I Quit (basically, it involves a microphone), then reminds everyone he refereed an I Quit match back in the day. Thanks, Roddy. Have another hot poker, Eric. Mondo nails Benoit and Eric Bischoff at the same time, then scores a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER OF DEATH. In the ring, tilt-a-whirl slam and Mondo goes for the hardware. He ducks a chairshot and boots Benoit in the face, and we get the first microphone sell ("Say it!" "NO!" THUNK!). Chairshot and Sledgehammer follow, and more microphone stuff. Benoit pokes Mondo in the eyes and tosses him to the floor, and more fun with the mic (THUNK THUNK THUNK) before another question. Answer: "Go to hell", so Benoit tries a brainbuster on the floor. Mondo slips out and sends Benoit on a tour of ringside. Back in the ring, M.Bison misses and Benoit unloads the CANADIAN VIOLENCE. Mondo takes the Bret Hart bump, and Benoit busts out the rolling Germans, going to five so some Harvard greenhorn won't upstage him cuz he's a right proper bastard like that. More asking, but Mondo gets an inverted atomic drop and lariat. Chairshot and Mondo goes up, but the Arabian facebuster misses. Sharpshooter, but Mondo chairs his way out of it. Mondo reverses it, but Benoit grabs the ropes. Benoit blocks a chairshot with his hand, but sells it anyway so that when Mondo asks, Benoit pulls his arm into the Crossface. That's why Benoit rules. Bischoff sticks the mic into Mondo's face, but Mondo won't give up. So Bischoff joins the fun (THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK) and keeps asking, but Mondo keeps refusing. Benoit switches to an STF, leaving Mondo's head more wide open (THUNK THUNK), then switches back to the Crossface as Mondo finally lets out an "iquit" at 15:38. Another poker for Bischoff going over in this match, which was otherwise another brutal brawl. ***1/4

- So Eric celebrates and waits for Molly to come out, "knowing" she won't be around. Bischoff and Benoit follow Mondo to the ambulance, where "Stone Cold" Molly Holly dives out onto Bischoff. She drags him to the ring, but Benoit levels Molly as they pass Evolution's locker room. Shawn gets back at Benoit, but Bischoff drags Molly to the ring. He stops to hit a martial arts kick in the aisle, but Molly low blows him as the crowd pops BIG. In the ring, Molly kicks his ass, getting the submission with a very poor Crippler Crossface. 3 pokers for the Crossface, but otherwise this was what it had to be -- an excuse to watch Eric get his (red-hot poker-burned) ass kicked.

- Round Three for All the Marbles: Chris Nowinski v. Lance Storm. This is, of course, a ladder match. Storm is STILL selling the neck injury. Nowinski dives for the ladder post-haste (he's SMART, you see), and a slugfest erupts in the aisle. Nowinski goes low, then crotches Storm with the ladder. YEEOUCH. Snapmare and elbowdrop on the ladder follow. Nowinski tosses Storm and gets the ladder... dropkicked in his face. Oops. The ladder goes into the ring as Storm tosses Nowinski into the railing and gets a clothesline off another rail. Back in with a springboard legdrop, and a Greco-Roman ladder shot follows. Storm makes the first climb, but gets suplexed off, landing on that there neck again. Nowinski goes CLUBBERIN', THEY BE CLUBBERIN', TONY and picks Storm up by his flattop. Into the ladder he goes, then into the corner. Nowinski tries to climb, so Storm missile dropkicks him off the ladder and pounds on Nowinski's leg. Half-crab again, but Nowinski with an ENZUIGIRI to break. I didn't know he could! Must be a special occasion. Nowinski climbs again, but Storm with a DRAGON SUPLEX~! off the ladder for a double KO. Storm gets the ladder, but Nowinski shoves them over -- with the ladder landing on Storm. Nowinski then hits a flying kneedrop on Storm, but the ladder's in the way and Nowinski injured the knee even more. PSYCHOLOGY~! The ladder's back up, but Storm gets a drop toehold and works the leg. Nowinski kicks Storm into the ladder to stop it. Nowinski slams Storm on the ladder, then pulls the ladder out and climbs, but Storm knocks it over and Nowinski is caught in the ropes. Storm slams the ladder into Nowinski's tied-up leg, but that just frees it. Storm puts the ladder against the post, but gets kicked as he returns. Bossman straddle is avoided, however, and Storm gets the LADDER ASSISTED RINGPOST FIGURE FOUR~! Storm has the match in hand and climbs, but Nowinski knocks the ladder aside, leaving Storm hanging for dear life. Nowinski jumps up, and they hang like characters in a videogame before falling off without the belt. Both men race for the ladder and set it up, but Rodney Mack runs in and yanks Storm away, allowing Nowinski to take the title at 18:11. DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT! That was a wicked awesome match until the interference. ***1/4 and 10 hot pokers for the run-in. Booker T and Scott Hall make he save as a Survivor Series match seems imminent.

- Main event, World title: Chris Jericho v. Randy Orton. I think we all know this won't end cleanly by now. They fight over a headlock, and Jericho gets the back suplex and ARROGANT COVER~! for two before Orton works the leg. Jericho with the CANADIAN VIOLENCE and a back elbow. Suplex, springboard dropkick, and facejam set up the Lionsault, which of course hits the knees. Spinning toehold, and Jericho gives up a two-count before making the ropes. DDT is reversed to the Walls of Jericho, and Orton makes the ropes. Jericho is dumped to the outside, and Orton tosses him in and tries a figure-four, but Jericho cradles for two. Lariat sets up the Play of the Day for two. RKO leads to a ref bump and EVERYONE looks to the entrance, where Chris Benoit emerges. Shawn Michaels makes the save and goes to town on both men, hitting a tope suicida on Benoit. Orton then just smashes Jericho with the chair as the melee continues. It's a Sportz Entertainment Finish at 11:00 or so. 5 hot pokers for a non-finish to the main event. ** Molly Holly and Rhyno charge in as well, so Austin makes them the opponents in Elimination Chamber III. But first, KICK WHAM STUNNER for Orton. Another 3 hot pokers for putting Austin over ANYONE at this stage in his career. Bischoff tells him to leave, but Molly gives Bischoff KICK WHAM STUNNER and beer is shared, end of show.

The Bottom Line:

Let's add one more hot poker for the whole card and call it an even 50 hot pokers up Bischoff's ass. He's gonna look back fondly on the asskickings the WWF gave him in the Monday Night Wars as being lovetaps by comparison.

Anyway, a total waste of a show, with run-ins and non-finishes everywhere that gave it a Russo-ish feel. Instead of delivering on the fans' efforts, they toss the card aside and encourage the fans to keep watching RAW, blowing off any goodwill they may have had. Congratulations.

Thumbs down.

*****

Your winners of the Prediction Contest, and thus my RAW booking team, are:

9 to 5

Hurricane Donald

K.O.T.W

Steve Corino

I'll take the Elimination Chamber because a belt is involved, but you'll have three matches to work on, so have fun. I gotta get some rest -- my booking is starting to suck.

[Steve Corino]

Cool. How do we do this then? AIM, MSN, PM?

But does winning on a bad show mean quite as much?