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Sousa

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Status Updates posted by Sousa

  1. Sousa

    "It's no secret, John Cena, that I've got a Mongolian beef with you!"

    1. Show previous comments  8 more
    2. gunnar hendershow

      gunnar hendershow

      "You're just a bunch of Queef Fried Rice!"

    3. NobBe Nobbs

      NobBe Nobbs

      Fuck you guys, I'm hungry now.

    4. Benji

      Benji

      Something about Cream of Sum Yung Gi.

  2. Sousa

    I'M A LOT LIKE YOU SO PLEASE HELLO I'M HERE I'M WAAAAAAAAAAAAAITIIIIIIIIIIIIING

  3. Sousa

    HEY, WHA HAPPUH?

    1. C-MIL

      C-MIL

      I actually never hired smily once I saw his face and the fact that he is 40 years and has puffy hair just made my computer frezze and scream NO MORE!!! NO MORE!!!

  4. Sousa

    That really chaps my vaginal lips.

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Your Mom

      Your Mom

      The hell?

    3. Sousa

      Sousa

      My vulva is vexed. Significantly vexed.

    4. King Ellis

      King Ellis

      This really offends my ovaries.

  5. Sousa

    Yeah, we the Promised Land, a sacred place, gettin' blessed by Josh O. Wuh from spaaaaace...

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. TEOL

      TEOL

      HEEEEEY

    3. Josh

      Josh

      GOD-GOD BLESS AMEEERICA!

    4. Sousa

      Sousa

      HEEEEEY

  6. Sousa

    1. Arrive 2. Have awesome sex 3. Leave

  7. Sousa

    I'm sorry to say this, but Beth Phoenix has much nicer breasts than Greg Valentine.

    1. LUKIE

      LUKIE

      Why must you be so full of hate?

    2. Gazz

      Gazz

      Ass's are about even though.

    3. IDOL

      IDOL

      That's not very feminist!

  8. Sousa

    ROAR AT MONKEYS

  9. Sousa

    That is actually the quickest anyone has ever catapulted onto my ignore list, back off of it, and then back onto it again.

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Sousa

      Sousa

      "Now I know you are a pompous git."

      Yay indeed!

    3. apsham

      apsham

      The ignore list was actually a suggestion made too. God damn, some people can't be pleased.

    4. Summers

      Summers

      Hey Sousa, don't use your status to say what you want.

  10. Sousa

    Someone get me some brownies. I'm not going to leave if you don't. Just someone do it. Now.

    1. Ol' Spanktooth

      Ol' Spanktooth

      Really Sousa, brownies? Have you ever heard of a salad? *eye roll*

    2. Sousa

      Sousa

      Fine, crumble up some brownies and sprinkle them over some arugula.

    3. Ol' Spanktooth

      Ol' Spanktooth

      mmm brownie croutons.

  11. Sousa

    Saying the fucking admins suck is a bannable offense on the profile of someone with a president's name repeated twice in his username. Best not do the same thing to GrantGrant.

  12. Sousa

    Leonard Cohen should not be allowed to eat oysters.

    1. GA!

      GA!

      Fuck Leonard Cohen and his cunting oysters.

    2. Sousa

      Sousa

      That pompous git.

  13. Sousa

    BADSTREET, ATLANTA GA, BADDEST STREET IN THE WHOLE USA

  14. Sousa

    When your only tool is top-notch video production, the whole world looks like an Arabic chant-fueled video package.

  15. Sousa

    Beef and Cheddarrrrr. FIVE FOR FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE.

    1. The Third Dukes

      The Third Dukes

      Indeed, Rax. Indeed.

  16. Sousa

    RIP Ptolemy.

  17. Sousa

    I am a better and more consistent @GingrichOfMars than Maxx is. <_<

    1. Maxx

      Maxx

      He hasn't been grandstanding enough, aside from Romney bashing. I need another debate to get my mojo back,

    2. Maxx

      Maxx

      He hasn't been grandstanding enough, aside from Romney bashing. I need another debate to get my mojo back,

  18. Sousa

    I have exactly zero hours and zero minutes a week for that kind of thing right now. Waaaaaaaaaaay busy.

  19. Sousa

    Rosa Mendez makes me feel funny in my pants.

    1. Meacon Keaton

      Meacon Keaton

      She makes me feel kinda funny. Like climbing the rope in gym class.

    2. Maxx

      Maxx

      La mirra! La mirra!

    3. jimbiz

      jimbiz

      me gusta

  20. Sousa

    1. Go to jth's poll thing in the EWR forum. 2. Vote for noted German kickboxer/strongman Gunther von Karma. 3. Magic.

    1. apsham

      apsham

      I did it, and now I have 7 fingers on one hand! Thanks Sousa!

  21. Sousa

    this is going to sound Marvin Gaye. What's going on?

    1. Pettengill_Mark

      Pettengill_Mark

      Winner

    2. LUKIE

      LUKIE

      gaye

    3. Kane's Mullet Slacker

      Kane's Mullet Slacker

      Sexual Healing.

  22. Sousa

    "Road Dogg, honey, the cable bill is past due." "OH YOU DIDN'T KNOW? YOUR ASS BETTER CAAAAAAAAAAALL TIME WARNEEEEEEEEEEEEER."

    1. Sousa

      Sousa

      (P.S. Road Dogg's wife calls him Road Dogg.)

    2. Maxx

      Maxx

      Idea 3.5/5 stars, execution 2/5 stars.

  23. Sousa

    "QueedeBox" sounds like something Frankie would call Cory on Boy Meets World.

    1. Sousa

      Sousa

      e.g., "Nice shirt, QueedeBox!"

    2. Maxx

      Maxx

      As an authority on Boy Meets World, I disagree. Frankie was far more eloquent than that.

  24. Sousa

    Every dollar you donate to The Sousa Foundation will go toward feeding hungry Andre the Giant.

    1. EWB's Best Poster.

      EWB's Best Poster.

      You gave your hunger a NAME?

  25. Sousa

    I will now provide EWB with the comprehensive list of wrestling women types that you all are allowed to find attractive. 1. Vickie Guerrero (obvs.) 2. Cheerleader Melissa 3. Rhaka Khan 4. Rosa Mendez (because, fuck, wow) 5. Nikki but not Brie 6. Rhonda Singh 7. Madusa (mountainous cleavage era) 8. Molly Holly

    1. Show previous comments  21 more
    2. King Ellis

      King Ellis

      So, all women?

    3. Sousa

      Sousa

      You are not allowed to find Natalya and Beth Phoenix attractive because they are WRESTLERS and not OBJECTS, GOD DAMN IT.

    4. Meacon Keaton

      Meacon Keaton

      I want them all to show me their boobs while they fan me and feed me grapes.

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