The Barclays Premier League Thread 2014/2015

[Hobo]

Frank Lampard looks really cold and scared.

[The Lusophone]

He's wondering why Khalifa asked to borrow his passport.

[Lineker]

Howard Webb will make himself available to explain key decisions to fans during the season as part of his role as technical director of the official referees' association. The 43-year-old is keen to "enlighten people" about reasons behind decisions.

[TCO]

"You see here in the replay, Rooney is clearly wearing a Man United shirt. Stonewall pen."

[Colly]

I hope it's as hilarious as Halsey on BT Sport.

[stokeriño]

Chelsea will shortly play two 45 minute matches against Fenerbahce (featuring The Heel Beard of MRLSH) and Besiktas (featuring Demba-Demba-Demba-Ba) in a mini charity tournament, raising money to help the families of those who suffered as a result of the Soma mining disaster.

First minutes back from holiday for Shirley, Oscar, etc. Come on guys! You've only got a week left!

[stokeriño]

So Costa just drove past four or five players and scored a pretty fantastic goal.

...And shortly thereafter is lucky to come away unscathed from a two-footed challenge by Bruno Alves, and Costa has to be held back from killing the bastard.

[Baddar]

So Costa just drove past four or five players and scored a pretty fantastic goal.

It's what he does!

He's a great striker. If he stays fit, his goals could win you the league.

[stokeriño]

He's a great striker.

IT'S WEIRD AND ALIEN TO ME.

[Baddar]

Chelsea have had plenty of wonderful strikers. Don't be greedy!

[stokeriño]

[Baddar]

They've let him have that one. Let's all stick a leg out and fall on the spot!

[stokeriño]

They're realising that the Demba Ba technique does not work for defenders.

[stokeriño]

After beating Fenerbahce 2-0, Chelsea lose 1-0 to Besiktas after conceding one of those late "corner headed down and poked home by unmarked player from close range" goals that we seem to love at the moment.

[Lineker]

For anyone finding themselves particularly bored this afternoon, Spurs vs. Schalke is on ITV4 from 1715.

[stokeriño]

And so, it has come to this...

...Watching today's Community Shield entirely as a scouting effort ahead of Fantasy Football squads being locked down next week.

[Baddar]

Well I was thinking of betting on City, and a 3-1 scoreline. Then I read that none of their World Cup players are featuring. I think Arsenal have a great chance now.

[Nerf]

Javier Manquillo and Dejan Lovren make their debuts for Liverpool against Dortmund. Should be fun!

[DavidMarrio]

Yeh hoping for a good game. Taken the girlfriend and her younger brother the game, their first time sitting in the kop.

[Baddar]

Poor Mrs Marrio. Make sure she clutches her purse tightly.