Premier League 2017/18

[Gazz]

Alan 'Never Relegated*' Pardew will be available.

*except that time with Charlton that he was but journalists either forget or ignore because 'narrative'.

[Adam]

3 hours ago, MDK said:

So what happens when Silva gets them into a relegation battle... Time for Bisto Tits to get back in? Oh, that would be hilarious.

Depends who is at the front of the merry-go-round ey. Pulis, Pardew, Hughes could all be there.

[Arjen Robben]

Emery is basically Coogan from The Bureau in The Day Today

[TCO]

He's clearly the butler from Mr. Deeds

[Jimmy]

2 hours ago, Arjen Robben said:

Emery is basically Coogan from The Bureau in The Day Today

 

https://twitter.com/_AndyHa/status/999268514711134208

huh, I thought that'd embed. worth a click tho. 
 

Edited May 23, 2018 by Jimmy

[Lineker]

Poch signs new contract at Spurs until 2023. Thank fuck for that.

[Adam]

Levy must be stumping up the transfer cash then?

[The Lusophone]

This is the sign a new contract to increase the transfer fee tactic. Real incoming if they lose on Saturday.

[DavidMarrio]

1 hour ago, MadJack said:

This is the sign a new contract to increase the transfer fee tactic. Real incoming when they lose on Saturday.

Fixed

[DavidMarrio]

1 hour ago, Lineker said:

Poch signs new contract at Spurs until 2023. Thank fuck for that.

 

[Lineker]

Stop, I can only get so erect.

[Jimmy]

4 hours ago, MadJack said:

This is the sign a new contract to increase the transfer fee tactic. Real incoming if they lose on Saturday.

Supposedly it’s £8.5 mil a year, so it’d cost em £40 mil plus.

[Lineker]

Raheem Sterling has gone and got an M16 assault rifle tattooed down the side of his whole leg.

[Colly]

Worse than the Sun. 

Here's real Lineker's take, plus an image somewhere which explains the reasoning and shows it doesn't cover his entire leg. 

 

[Baddar]

The Sun have gone with "Ace's sick new tattoo". I'm not sure if they like it or not, mind.

[MDK]

Some in the media seem to have it out for Raheem.

It goes on.

[DavidMarrio]

Are we actually still surprised that The S*n are massive scumbags who'll report any shite and be misleading with it or down right stating inaccurate false shite...

[Lineker]

I mean, I get the reasoning,I just don't think it's his smartest idea ever - unless you get the context tattooed on there as well

[Adam]

It's his leg, why does it matter to all of us? The quoted anti-gun campaigner "demanding" he gets it lasered or covered up is laughable.

The BBC's article on it is also useless, it is basically derived entirely from The Sun's article trying to claim people are outraged. Seems to me only that rag is outraged, as it is every time Sterling blows his nose.

I'm sure this is only the start of the media going all-out to drag the England team down before they've even tried to play a game. It's a bi-annual tradition now.

[Lineker]

It doesn't matter to the likes of us - I'm just thinking of dumb impressionable kids.

 

Also I'm full of so much drugs right now and I'm ever so ill still (actually dying) so there's an above 50% chance that I'm spouting a higher level of bollocks than usual.